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Let's Plays

     Amnesia: The Dark Descent 
  • At the end of episode 7, Jesse hits The Water Part. The Co-Dependent girls (who have played the game and know what's coming) egg him on until he steps into the water, at which point everything dissolves into a confusion of giggling, Angrish and the splashes of oncoming doom. "Keep Out Of The Water..."
  • In episode 22, Jesse somehow manages to fake out a monster in the funniest way possible.

     Saints Row The Third 

  • Jesse plays a round of Magicka for a special Fourth of July livestream. Jesse plays a game with Friendly Fire. With three other people. They let him have a gun. FOR AMERICA!

  • In episode 24 of the Terraria Let's Play, Jesse throws a bomb in a small space where both he and TotalBiscuit are trapped. TotalBiscuit lives.
    • Made even funnier due to the fact that they can't kill each other unless they change teams, but they don't even realize it yet.
  • In one episode, Jesse acquired a top hat that TotalBiscuit wanted. Bad stuff occurred.
  • In another episode, a glitch had occurred and the previous episode was lost. Lets just say that many a Brick Joke happened.
    Jesse: AND FOR 14.99 you too can know what happened in that fateful episode.
  • The secrets of Castle von Jessenstein v 1.0 were truly valuable.
  • Where Jesse tried to trick TotalBiscuit with dynamite by claiming it was what was in a chest. Once again, he lives, and Jesse has killed himself with explosives yet again.
  • A fan put together a montage of the many, many, many deaths of Jesse and TB during the first Terraria series.

     Terraria - The Next World Generation 
  • Episode 10 of Terraria: The Next World Generation has Jesse devolving into Angrish after TB shows that the fruits of their labor in the jungle (where he was constantly dying) happened to be 2 statues that don't do anything.
    • What makes this even funnier is that TB is laughing so hard that he—in his words here—can't breathe properly.
    • It was also this episode that the Great Space Butterfly first came into being.
  • From Episode 30: "Fujimora Yachtsu", a pun so incredibly lame it left TotalBiscuit in physical pain.
    • Alternative names were LoLboat One, and Frankenboat Joe.
  • In Episode 34, TB and Jesse's death counts have been equal, until one point. At one point, while TB is putting items away, Jesse sneaks up to a sky island and aggros a Wyvern so it will kill TB. It worked... to some extent.
  • For a considerable number of episodes near the end (so far) of the series, TB and Jesse repeatedly tried to reach the Underground Jungle - which was being overrun by the Hardmode Corruption - to harvest Moonglow for potions, and repeatedly died, often when nearly in sight of the jungle (or even in the surface portion of it). Finally Moonglow was acquired, and they returned to home base...only to discover that there had been five Moonglow in one of their chests the entire time.
  • When making the hellivator, Jesse and TB were mining through some obsidian, with lava on three sides and water on top. They mined faster than the obsidian could be created, making them both fall down into the lava and die. Even worse is that one of their tombstones ended up under their shaft, causing more lava-related deaths because obsidian couldn't form over the tombstone.
  • The same fan that made the video of the Terraria deaths for the first season made another one for this season.

     The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim 
  • Anytime he goes into a vocal rendition, such as saying "Diabeetus" when he sees a Horker.
  • The moment he figures out he can put the Shock spell on both hands, Jesse unleashes the only quote worth using in such a situation as he fries a wolf in true Sith fashion.
  • Episode 27. While hunting vampires, Jesse's Dragonborn manages to score decapitation, after decapitation, and finisher kills in general, then in the end, gets his own head cut off by Movarth, the master vampire.
    Jesse: Oh irony!
  • Look, I'm a novice, here...
  • The entirety of Episode 36, with Jesse's constant confused/scared reaction during the Sheogorath quest, and his frustration with the puzzles.
  • In Episode 48, while Jesse is 'sneaking' in the Thalmor Embassy, when he is in the courtyard he is ambushed by a dragon! Not only that but soon not one but two more dragons appear as well, distracting the Thalmor
    Jesse: (Hears roar) Wait, was that a dragon?!
    (Gets bathed in flames)
    • Earlier while he was headed for the Embassy, a dragon attacked him, while he was naked no less. Understandably he died almost instantly. On his second time he equipped as much armor he could (only some gauntlets) and charged the dragon... only for the dragon to One-Hit Kill him. The third time, after deciding to suit up at the nearby town, the dragon doesn't appear at all.
    • Even funnier, that dragon might have been one of the dragons that attacked the embassy.
  • The song at the end of Episode 55.
  • At the end of Episode 64 Jesse encounters a boss Draugr, which leads to this
    Jesse: Come at me bro! Come at me!
    Draugr: Fus Ro Dah!
    *Jesse gets Blown Across the Room, and dies*
    Jeese: Oh shit! Well he came at me.
  • In episode 67 and 68, Jesse does a quest that involves investigating a murder, and he makes good use of a certain Memetic Mutation.
  • An unfortunate friendly fire incident! Slowed down if you didn't quite catch it here.
  • Jesse's reaction to Lizzy leaving him in episode 78.
    "You didn't have to stoop so low! Have your friends collect your weapons and change your location! I guess I don't need your bow! Now you're just the Lizzy that I used to know..."

  • In Part 13 he complains that he might have to worry about Carla's claustrophobia and while Carla is leaving the asylum...
    Jesse: "Well at least I don't have to do any claustrophobia anything."
    * Lights go out*
    Jesse: "*Beat* SON OF A BITCH!!"
  • In the beginning of Part 15 when Jesse is trying to get past a couple of guards again.
    Jesse: "Focus Jesse. Focus with all of your focusing abilities."
    * immediately gets caught*
    Jesse: "God damn it..."
  • The Final Part. Jesse doesn't even make that many jokes in it, instead just reacting the how batshit insane the last part of the game is. And his final reaction to the endings. "WHY IS THERE NO ANSWERS!" indeed.
    "Fahrenheit is the fevered dream of a psychopath. It's a nonsensical, insane, ridiculous ride into the maw of madness. One cannot describe it, only experience it. And God help those who tread this path. 10/10, Game of the Year." - Jesse Cox

     Mc Pixel 
  • Just about anytime Jesse's response to a puzzle solution with "Well, that just happened..."
  • During the second Bonus Level set:
    I'm not sure how... womens' undergarments work.

     Dead Space 
  • on Part 9 just as he barely survives the vacuum he says:
    Jesse: "There is a lesson to be learned here that I probably should take some oxygen, although it gave me an oxygen tank in the room, no, I'm pretty sure the game is gonna be nice to me, I don't think it's going to be a dick and like, pull anything crazy on me here."
    * cue tentacles grabbing his leg*
    Jesse: "OH SHIT! What is that? Oh God! I AM NOT A SCHOOLGIRL!"
    • A similar situation in part 18 where he get's attacked by another of those tentacles, and later fights the boss that the tentacle spawned from. Which, as he points out, can be best described as a 'space anus'.
  • Jesse: I just noticed my life...
  • In Part 27, Jesse logs out and back into the game to grab a bit of loot that the game wouldn't let him get, only to, well:
    Jesse: So I cut there because I logged out, and then logged back in, specifically for the purpose of getting this loot. Because as a loot whore I feel like—
    *turns to see that the loot is gone from the wall panel*
    Jesse: *after looking around for the loot for a few seconds* ...are you kidding me?! This game has truly become terrifying. When—when loot starts disappearing, it has become a loot whore's worst nightmare! Great! Great, so it mocked me first, and then it was like, I'm out, bitch!
  • Part 28
    Jesse (singing): This is the e-lev-ator song - (door opens to reveal exploding enemy) OH SHIT!!
  • One of the best parts throughout the entire Let's Play of Dead Space and Dead Space 2 is how Jesse can be perfectly Genre Savvy regarding an upcoming Necromorph attack, yet still freak the hell out at the inevitable Jump Scare.
  • On a similar note, every time Kendra or Hammond contact Isaac, it comes with a loud blast of static that never fails to surprise Jesse.
  • The final words of the Let's Play:
    Yeah... I'm gonna- I'm gonna- I'm gonna skip Impossible Mode...


     Far Cry 3 

     Dead Space 2 
  • During the puzzle where Isaac has to move some fuses around to shut down ANTI, he becomes convinced he has the puzzle down. Only to... well:
    Jesse: So, red is dead, and blue is in the goo!
    (Inserts first fuse, which turns blue.)
    Jesse: Blue! Nice. Okay, stick this down here...
    (Inserts second fuse. It turns green. Beat)
    Jesse: Wait, what? What the hell is green?! (bursts out laughing)
    • Even better, when he connects all the fuses so that they're green, he finds a secret room containing loot and Peng!
  • Best glitch ever. Gets even more hilarious towards the end of the video.

     Star Craft II: Heart of the Swarm 

     Star Craft II: Legacy of the Void 
  • During their very first playthrough of a Co-op mode mission with TotalBiscuit, Jesse plays as the Zerg and announces his plans to re-form Death Squad 7. TB repeats every single argument that Jesse made during the Hot S playthrough that led up to the creation of Death Squad 7 in the first place. Also constitutes an extemporaneous Brick Joke.
  • He somehow manages to spin Amon corrupting the Khala into a fanfic arc about Artanis stealing Zeratul's space car. And makes it work in-canon.
  • The Death Squad 7 Brick Joke continues in the mission "Purification": The Purifier forces start chasing a group of overlords and slaughters them.
    Jesse: "Death Squad Seven: never stood a chance."
  • Occasionally a Colossus will poke its head in on the War Council chamber as it walks by. Jesse's reaction is almost always amusing, especially when it looks like the giant robot is eavesdropping on a plot-relevant conversation.

     Bio Shock Infinite 
  • The first part features Jesse rendered speechless—partly because he's blown away by the scenery, and partly because he has no idea what the hell is going on.
  • About the Lutece twins: "WHY DO I LOVE AND/OR HATE YOOOUUU?!"
  • After seeing Booker's dream about Columbia attacking New York and arriving in the Garden of New Eden, Jesse then finds the inscription "The Seed of the Prophet shall sit the throne and drown in flame the Mountains of Man."
    Jesse: Is that... Oooh, is that a prophecy of what I saw in my dream of the vision of the future in my office when I opened the door? I know that made no sense, what I just said...
  • Jesse's "old-timey" voice. Especially when he decides to sing while using it.
  • The incident at the raffle: first, Jesse is driven to hysterical giggling by Fink's casually racist comment about "the prettiest white girl in all of Columbia"; then he realizes that he's just won on number 77 after being warned not to... and then it turns out that he's won the first throw in the public stoning of a mixed-race couple. Cue incredulous shouts of "Wait what? What the shit... WHAT?! What is happening here?" Then Booker fights back by ramming a policeman's face into a skyhook, leading to an incredibly bloody fight scene, and all of a sudden, Jesse's laughing again.
    Jesse: "Uh, sirs, can we have a conversa—OH GOD, OKAY, NEVERMIND!"
  • Upon arriving in the Monument Island research center, Jesse finds an overturned chair with a shirt draped over it and a pair of shoes lying nearby; he immediately speculates that the previous owner was just so startled that his shoes and shirt blew off and he ran out of the building completely naked.
    Jesse: Future DLC.
  • In part 9, Jesse comes across a Kinetescope in the arcade after going through and seeing the Colored & Irish bathrooms compared to the White bathrooms.
    Jesse: What other horrific racist thing are we gonna fi—"Solving the Irish Problem", of course! Of course...
  • Upon encountering the animatronic, poem-reciting George Washington in the Hall of Heroes lobby, Jesse's computer suffered a critical error and crashed. Jesse could only speculate that it simply couldn't handle the awesomeness.
  • Part 13 has Jesse performing the single most violent mood swing imaginable. After listening to the somber, doomed message on one of Slate's audio-logs he delivers this thoughtful insight:
    Jesse: ... Interesting, I'm not sure where to put his character yet... (sees enemy soldier and blasts him in the back) But I know where to put this guy's character! ON THE GROUND!
    • Elizabeth's expression in response helps sell it.
    Jesse: "I'm comin' for ya, Slate - OH SHIT, HE'S COMIN' FOR ME! *Beat* Note to self, he has more guys..."
  • The first encounter with the Motorized Patriots.
    • "That is one pissed-off George Washington!"
    • "Come on, George! I cannot tell a lie, I'm going to shoot you in the e- ("George" charges his cover, minigun blazing) OH SHIT!"
    • "Mr Ple... President... You've been voted out of office."
    • "The only thing I got out of that was that I almost called George Washington "Mr Plesident." You know, because he's so happy, he's pleasident."
  • At Finkton Docks, Jesse runs into another Motorized Patriot, and is halfway through calling it George when he realizes that it's actually modelled on Ben Franklin.
  • While exploring the Shantytown, with its "keep your guns, we need food" sign, Jesse realizes he might be responsible for Columbia's food shortage.
  • "Wait, they've got minotaurs, now?!"
  • In yet another encounter with Motorized Patriots, Jesse finds himself fighting a Vox Populi-aligned version modeled after Abraham Lincoln. After taking a few potshots at it with his Hand Cannon - and laughing over the fact that he's trying to shoot Abraham Lincoln in the head - he realizes that Elizabeth can summon a Motorized Patriot of her own to fight it... but this one's modeled on George Washington. Cue massive squee attack as the two mechanized presidents square off. George Wins.
    Jesse: George Washington vs Abraham Lincoln! Goooooooo History!
  • His response to hearing the "Whispers Through The Walls" voxophone, which implies that the Lutece Twins are really just the same person, but from different dimensions.
  • While he's about to board the gondola to Comstock House, Jesse takes the time to poke around before deciding that it probably isn't a boss area.
    Jesse: Is there a reason to be up here? Besides the fact that things look cool. Nope, I don't really see one... unless I'm about to get into a fight, but that seems unlikely, 'cause I've killed literally everyone... Alright, here we go-
    Songbird: SCREEEEEE!!
    Jesse: OH GODDAMMIT!

     Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon 
  • Jesse's constantly competing with Rex Power Colt's one-liners.
  • Jesse correctly predicts Rex's dialogue during a scene with Dr. Darling in Part 3, when Dr. Darling is offering an injection to make him as powerful as the Big Bad.
    Rex: No, Doc. No way. I swore an oath to a special lady.
    Jesse: Lady Liberty.
    Dr. Darling: Your... wife?
    Jesse: Say it.
    Rex: No, lady liberty
    Jesse: yea-ha-hahhh! America!
    Rex: She taught me that winners... don't use drugs.
    Jesse: Fuck yeah!
  • Jesse takes a quick, terror and rant-filled ride down a river in a jet ski in Part 9. It ends when he rides right into the mouth of a mutant crocodile.
  • Jesse's glee throughout the Battle Armored Dragon Assault Strike System portion of the finale.
    Battle Dragon: DO YOU LIKE RIDING ME?
    Jesse: I do, buddy!
  • "Can I 'F' this guy?"

     Kerbal Space Program w/ Myndflame 
  • The series is full of these. A large amount of the humor though comes from Clint (who is very experienced at the game) being a Deadpan Snarker to Jesse, who is practically new at the game.
  • In part 3, Jesse wants to send a Space Butterfly themed rocket to the moon. To which Clint has already prepared one but much to his objection, Jesse decides to make his own. The results of their first launch are expected.
    Clint: *mocking Jesse* "Or we could just build a Space Butterfly!"

     Dead Space 3 w/ Dodger 
  • You know a Let's Play is off to a good start when the first gunfight after the prologue ends with this:
    Unitologist: AAAAH! *BOOM*
    Dodger: What.
    Jesse: Bane just blew himself up on the top of my damn car!

     Cube World w/ Wowcrendor 
  • Part 3: Jesse and Crendor come across a castle named Sesel Palace; their first attempt to enter ends with them getting murdered by a small army of very powerful, very angry humans.

     Saints Row IV w/ Wowcrendor 

     Outlast w/ Wowcrendor 
  • The first jump scare of the Coxtober season.
  • Jesse is way too Genre Savvy for this game, constantly yelling at the main character for not turning around and leaving at the first (or second or third) sign of danger.
  • Jesse and Crendor pretending that Chris Walker is that guy on the ghost hunter shows that keeps yelling "Come and fight me, ghosts!"
  • In part 3, Crendor reaches over and taps Jesse on the back freaking him out.
    • They find the naked twins at the end.
    Jesse: That is definite penis. I wanna go back to when it's blurry!
    Crendor: I'd like to veto this whole process.
  • In Part 8, when Jesse successfully escapes from and kills Dr. Trager, both he and Crendor are Flipping the Bird at him.
  • Part 12: Jesse & Crendor's reactions to watching Hitler Ghost, a.k.a. Walrider, tear up Chris Walker, who they've spend the last couple episodes developing a special hatred for. Crendor starts clapping.
    Jesse: You can't applaud Hitler Ghost!
    Crendor: Why not?!
  • Jesse and Crendor confused and raging about the ending.
    Crendor: Even David Lynch would play this game and be like "What just happened at the end I don't understand."
    Jesse: *laughing* Well you see David: this game was like a river. A river of idea fish. And the creators caught those idea fish, but ate them before they had time to lay the, the brain seeds.

     Marlow Briggs and the Mask of Death 
  • The Running Gag of Jesse singing "MARLOW BRIIIIIGGS!" whenever he opens a door, and then getting annoyed when there's no one on the other side of it to hear him doing it.
  • In episode 4, he ends up defeating a boss in 5 seconds when he accidentally knocks the guy off the platform.
  • In episode 9, he tries out the ice power up and winds up getting a 100 hit combo, this causes the mask to go into a massive rant about how awesome Marlow is, to the point he drowns out the plot.

     Tokyo Jungle 
  • During Part 3 when he starts playing the lost fawns searching for their mother.
    Jesse: I'm saying right now if I get there and the she's dead I'mma be pissed off at that Bambi shit. Oh, by the way, spoiler alert for Bambi...
    • Jesse compares sneaking past hyenas to Metal Gear then cracks up upon discovering the sequence invlves hiding under a box.
    • Jesse gets killed but the second deer, still being attacked by the hyena, is immune to harm (due to later needing to die in a cutscene).
      Jesse: Brother! If you were impervious to harm you should have led!
    • Jesse sees a velociraptor (after chanting "No monsters. No monsters")
      Jesse (while laughing): What?! Why is there a velociraptor?! This is un- this is even imposisble! It's not unbelievable. This is impossible! How am I supposed to- Oh my God!
  • Jesse encounters Kangaroos and rabbits, armed with boxing gloves.
    Jesse: Oh no, ohh no! They all got boxing gloves. Why do the rabbits have boxing gloves?! Who puts boxing gloves on rabbits?!
    • From the same episode, Jesse's inability to say Pteranodon. Followed immediately after by a lion club seeing a Pteranodon and running to its mother:
      Lion Cub: Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom! Guess what I saw! Guess what I saw!
      Lioness: Oh my God... Dear diary, please kill me.
  • Jesse's raging in part 10 as Act 11 of the story mode quickly turns into That One Level for him. At various points he devolves into Angrish and you can hear him throwing the controller down or banging on a desk in frustration, or breaking down as the game starts him far back.
    Jesse: Where's Scar? Where the fuck is that piece of shit? I am gonna kill him. I'm gonna personally murder his face right off.

     Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance 
  • Part 7 begins with Jesse explaining how some commenters told him that not every secret appears on AR. Meaning from then on, he'd be spending much, much more time scouring the levels for loot. He repeatedly insists that the viewers brought this on themselves.
  • Jesse's freak-out during part 15 during the boss rush before Sundowner.
    Jesse: *Having just destroyed Mistral's body double* Well that shit just occurred and it was kinda freakin' awesome! Also? Her robot body? Still pretty sexy, just sayin'.
    *Beat then Monsoon's body double ambushes Jesse and begins ripping him apart.*
    Jesse: OH MY—WHAT!? *Laughing* Oh COME ON!
    Boris: And a spare Monsoon? Well, if it's AI-controlled it should pose no problem for you, yes?
    Jesse: Oh my god, what are you talking about!? This is a problem for me!
    *Monsoon beats the tar out of Jesse more*
    Jesse: *Disbelieving laugh* Oh my god...Yep, this is a problem for me.

     South Park: The Stick of Truth 
  • Episode 1: Jesse's overdramatic opening narration.
  • The Running Gag of him going in every shower and pooping in every toilet he sees.
  • His interaction with Ned at the start of part 6.
    Ned: You remind me of a guy I served with in 'Nam.
    Jesse: *Imitating Ned's voice box* Thank you.
    Ned: Remember you can legally kill anything in self-defense.
    Jesse: They're coming right for us.
    Ned: Do you need to borrow my voice box?
    Jesse: *Speaking normally* Nope! Got it covered!
  • It takes a while, but in Part 7 Jesse finally finds the fart button.
  • Jesse's absolute refusal to, when given the option, skip past Jimmy's stuttering attempts to say the words "enchantment" & "destiny"
    Oh I'm not skippin' this. Nope. I'm putting the controller down. Let's see how far down the rabbit hole we go.
    • He enjoys it so much that, in part 13, he doesn't seem to even realize you can't skip an instance that occurs during a side-quest.
  • Part 10 begins with a disclaimer:
    Jesse: Warning: The following episode contains... Butt Stuff. If you don't what that means or you have a problem with... Butt Stuff, then don't watch because you will be offended. But if you made it through, like, episode 2 of South Park back in the 90s, you should be okay. But remember.. Butt Stuff!
    • Jesse gets an alien helmet, immediately recognizes its resemblance to a Dragon Ball Z scouter, and dyes it accordingly.
  • Jesse cracks up watching the New Kid staring blankly ahead at the screen:
    "I don't know why that's so funny to me! His expression's just like 'Why do you do this to me? Why do you do this to yourself?' *giggles* Shut up, Internet! I thought it was funny."
  • Jesse sees Jimmy now has the ability "Brown Note:"
    Oh my God, I wanna see a Nazi Zombie shit himself!
  • The aptly titled part 18 "Don't Watch This" has this preface, where he starts out strongly before quickly deflating. His reaction once he reaches a certain point explains it all.
    Warning! The following episode will scar you for life. Don't watch this. If you have kids in the room, do NOT let them watch this. This is one for adults only. Go watch kittens on the Internet. Don't watch this episode.
  • Jesse summoning Mr. Slave inside his own asshole.

     Diablo III: Reaper of Souls 
  • After speaking to Ivy, an NPC whose husband was killed in the Big Bad's initial attack, Jesse meets another NPC:
    Male NPC: At long last, a hero comes to save us. That won't bring my wife back, though, will it?
    Jesse: (singsong) I know a lady who's single! (normal) If you're lookin'.

  • Jesse's escalating Big Whats in part two when the early plot twists start kicking in.
  • During the initial scene between John Yesterday and Henry White:
    Jesse: What I thought was a game about a nerdy hero turned out to be a game about a nerdy ginger villain. Ooh, this is even more exciting!

     Wolfenstein: The New Order 
  • Jesse puts his Bond One-Liner skills to work:
    Jesse:*shoots a Nazi sailor in the head* Something something semen joke!
  • Jesse begins quoting "Never Hesitate" whenever he gets a knife kill, despite being unable to remember what movie its from.

     Among the Sleep 
  • Jesse deciding he's going to sneak around in the bushes "like a baby Metal Gear Solid".
    Jesse: Baby Snake they'll call me!
    • Just the way he's so tactical about the whole thing with keeping himself in cover to hide from the monster(s), considering he's playing a two year old. It makes the game slightly less scary - but only slightly.
  • Jesse's first encounter with the monster and first proper jump scare.
  • Jesse and the Top Hat Fish. He can't resist the obvious joke...
    Jesse: (as the fish) Let me tell you about fov sliders!
  • Saying a drawing looks like Slenderman in a hat.

    Resident Evil 6 w/ Cryaotic (Chaoticmonki) 

    Shovel Knight w/ The Completionist 
  • In episode 1, Jesse asks if he can go down the hole.
    Jesse: Is this a hole I can go down in?
    Jirard: There are rarely holes you want to try and go down in.
    Jesse: Heh heh heh, internet!
    Jirard: Heh heh... we're twelve.
    • #YouTubeMeat
      Jirard: That meat, though, that Youtube meat.
      Jesse: Ladies! Hashtag YouTubeMeat.
      Jirard: I don't think there's ever an appropriate time to say "hashtag YouTubeMeat."
      Jesse: That's why I said it. You know me, I've never been an appropriate person.
  • Throughout episode 2, Jesse's increasing worry and raging about dying as Jirard convinces him to destroy the checkpoints. Coupled by, at one point, Jesse destroying a checkpoint completely without thinking about it.
    Jirard: You should see his face right now. So angry.
    • This exchange as Jirard takes over to replay the level after Jesse dies:
      Jesse: You're Spider-Man to my Gwen Stacy. How'd that work out?
      Jirard: I feel that I have betrayed you. I feel that i am now going to be Spider-Man for forever no matter what anyone says; and Mary Jane Watson and I will never be.
      Jesse: Nope I'm going to give you a Mephisto bargain and reset the universe so that marriage never happens.
    • After Jesse gets the "Get to the Point" Achievement for destroying the checkpoints in Pridemoor Keep
      Jesse: Oh, and it's only one level?
      Jirard: There's one all the levels.
      Jesse: Oh to Hell with that!
  • Part 4:
    • Jesse speaks to the Dancer after defeating Specter Knight, both he and Jirard are nearly entirely silent through the dance, though apparently Jesse's face was something to behold.
      Jesse: That was fabulous!
    • Jesse dies in the Explodatorium and, upon restarting, immediately destroys the checkpoint. Cue Jirard cracking up laughing while Jesse himself wonders why he even did that, followed by several Big Nos.

    Hyrule Warriors 
  • At the start of the playthrough we have Jesse's reaction to the lack of voice acting in the game:
    Ohhh! No crappy voice acting?! Don't worry I'll cover it.
    • From part 1: Volga's No One Could Survive That!:
      Jesse (as Volga): They certainly aren't alive after that! Smug face.
    • Jesse meets the Great Fairy:
      Jesse: Hoooly shit. Princess, look, I-I... she's very tempting. I love you but that girl got faries. Faries with explosives. I can not say no to her. (later) That fairy just unloaded what I assume is a tactical nucular strike.
  • From Part 2:
    Hylian Captain: Reinforcements are here! Oh, thank goodness!
    Jesse: And then an entire army shows up, that's okay.
    • Immediately after, Impa (who Jesse is playing as) stops the action to point out some lava.
      Jesse: I was dealing a killing blow to an army... me!
    • Jesse's very excited to discover you can cut grass.
  • At the end of Part 6, Jesse's caught off-guard by one of the game's Reveals.
    Midna: Lana, her face... it looks just like yours...
    Jesse: I mean, they are Generic Anime Characters, so I feel like-
    Lana: I am Cia's other half-
    Jesse: I'm sorry, her what?
  • From Part 8
    • Jesse's utter bewilderment that he had been saying Fi's name wrong the entire time.
  • During episode 13, the camera focuses on Cia for entirely too long. Jesse promptly forgets why they're fighting.

    Shadow of Mordor 
  • The biggest of Jesse's mistakes would have to be the episode titled "Too Many Orcs", where a bonus objective says to Strike From Above. Jesse attempts this, only to fall onto a captain. After a few moments, Jesse is surrounded and meets another captain. And then a third one. At one point, you can hear him throw the controller to the floor.
    • At one point, Jesse kills a captain named Klimp... Only for the guy to return not five minutes later. Jesse is astounded and starts screaming.

    Dragon Age: Inquisition 
  • Not even five minutes into the game Jesse decides he has to remake the player character in the image of Nicolas Cage (or, as Jesse called him, Nicolas Mage).
  • Jesse's idea for the next game- Dragon Age IV: The Demons Have Guns.
  • After hearing bards sing about Sera, Jesse is outraged that his own character doesn't have a song, so he makes one up, and even he admits it's shitty.
    There once was a man who was called Nick Mage,
    He stared at me and I felt real strange.
    So I wrote this song, to say I love him—
    Just like everyone else!

    Far Cry 4 

    Heroes of the Storm 
  • Heroes of the Storm - THE GREATEST UNDERDOG STORY EVER is this because at the end of the day we have four cute creatures; Brightwing, Lili, Murky and Baby Abathur with the only 'serious' character being Valla beating powerhouses like Tyrande, Tychus, Tassadar, Muradin and the Lich King. It's even more hilarious when you start to think of them as the Muppet Babies of Blizzard, with Valla as their babysitter.

    The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt 
  • Jesse tests whether or not it's possible to start a romantic encounter with Yennefer.
    Jesse: We've got one more candle, and the hopes of a thousand young men on our side!

    Saints Row: Gat out of Hell w/ Wowcrendor 
  • You can tell it's off to a great start when Jesse drives into a lava pit, managing to kill both of them even not 5 minutes into the game.
    Jesse: No matter what we do, nothing changes!
  • Jesse points out that since they're in hell, Crendor might finally get the chance to punch Hitler. Crendor is very excited.
  • Jesse getting fed up with Crendor's tangents and inane stories.
    • In Part 6, Jesse stops for a moment to upgrade his character, while Crendor tells a story about trying to buy The Moaning of Life but running into region-locking restrictions. A few minutes later Jesse is violently ejected from the menu screen by a fiery explosion.
      Jesse: What the hell, I just - what the hell happened?!
      Crendor: I'unno.
      Jesse: What have you been doing out here?!
      Crendor: Shootin' people.
      Jesse: Were you just calmly talking about Karl Pilkington while the world was ending around us?! There is a tank here! There is an army of demons and a tank!
  • Their reactions to the drive-able machine gum armchair weapons. And then Crendor starts pretending he's Stephen Hawking while in his.
    Jesse (pretending to be a demon) The age of man has come to an end! (trumpet noises)
    Jesse (nearly wets himself laughing)
    • Crendor loves the chair so much he uses it exclusively for the rest of the playthrough.
  • In Part 9, Jesse cracks up when picking up said Armchair weapon then having it appear that Johnny Gat carries it around instead of sitting

     Minecraft and RPG Makers 
  • Jesse’s blind first foray into Minecraft. Having no idea what he’s supposed to be doing, he ends up confused and terrified.
  • Slyfox and the Yogscast both have a go at trying to explain Minecraft to Jesse, with variying levels of success.
  • “Damn you Cookie Monster!” The start of omzit’s Running Gag of throwing cookies in everyone’s way.
  • ”Trust us, we’re Americans.”
  • Meeuwes randomly starts singing a Dutch rap song where the only line in English is “Diamonds on my neck, bitch.” And he keeps going, even while Jesse and the others are making fun of him and trying to figure out what the heck he’s saying.
    Jesse:What does that mean? *Meeuwes keeps singing* '’What does that mean?’’
    Jesse:*starts singing random nonsense* I can make up gibberish words too, what does that mean? *Meeuwes ignores him and keeps going*
    Jesse:What is he doing with blintzes? He has a baby on his blintzes?
  • "Don’t fall off naked baby!”
  • Any of the "build days" where fans and sometimes professionals are invited on to the server to help with large scale builds. Hilarity often ensues along with the awesomeness.
  • One day, Omzit shows up drunk…
    Jesse:People watching right now are probably like “Boy. Thomas is extra annoying today. Well…”
    omzit:Oh, annoying, is that what I am now?! Well thank you very f*cking much you…buh, something!
  • After months of waiting, a new episode finally came out. Hilarity ensued.
    • Thomas, at Jesse's request, does a rap about pirates. Jesse then asks for a rap about Meeuwes. The result has to be censored multiple times.
    • The censor beep gets used several more times after that. At one point Lewis repeats something that gets beeped out - all we know is that he didn't know it was offensive and he somehow added a slur and made it worse.
    • The Golden Hoe.
    • "I'm trying to congratulate you and you're all cats."
  • The Running Gag that they keep unintentionally building things that look like penises.
  • RPG Makers: Memory Lane has everyone going back through all the old stuff they build and remembering all the stupid jokes they made.
    • Meeuwes and Jesse prancing.
    • They try out a boss fight, but since they don't have the custom mobs in yet it looks like a skeleton turns into a spider. Jesse complains/mocks them about this for the rest of the video.
    • Jesse finds a little grove out in the middle of nowhere that he's told to ignore. Obviously he doesn't, and he decides that it's going to be an Easter Egg with a circle of Omzits/Thomas' that dance once every hour, and a hidden weapon that looks like a cookie and makes more cookies.
    Jesse: This is a thing now!

     Valiant Hearts 
Usually the game's driving sequences since it involves classical music.
  • Jesse lampshades the French being REALLY bad drivers while Anna drives a taxi full of French soldiers leaving Paris in chapter 2.
    Why is this always happening~
    I've never been to Paris IS THIS A THING?!~
    Dodging poles and other cars, HOW THE HELL I GET THIS FAR?!~
    OH. MY. GOD. NO!~
    Well, I'm doing oka-AHHH!
    [laughs] This is great!
    Why are there so many guys on the road tonight~
    I don't know why OH MY GOD THERE ARE BARRELS~
    Is Donkey Kong up there, I don't know~
    Oh my god, please don't crash into me, I don't want to die!

     Life is Strange 
  • Jesse's imitation of a random bird watching Max and Warren, with a high pitch voice.
    Jesse: Warren! It's me! I've come from the forest to warn you! You're in the friend zone!
  • Reading the introductory text about actions having consequences for Episode 4, just after seeing his actions as a time traveler resulted in Chloe becoming quadriplegic.
    Jesse, while audibly upset: Life is Strange is a story-based game that features player choice where you hurt your friends.
    Dodger, same: Where you try to go back in time to make everything better but then you mess it all up again.

    Resident Evil 5 w/ Cryaotic (Chaoticmonki) 
  • Part 1:
  • In Part 2
  • In Part 3
  • Part 6: Jesse bravely confronts his fear of aquatic predators.
  • Part 7 takes place in a tribal village on stilts over a croc-infested marsh. Jesse has an intense phobia of water monsters. And Cry is a troll. Hilarity ensues.
    • The best part is that if you check out Cry's footage of the incident, it confirms that he was indeed half-assing the QTE to get Jesse through the section.
      Cry: Ah, I gotta take a breather, hold on a sec-
      Jesse: WHAT?! WHAT?! WHY?!
    • Jesse and Cry note the chemistry between Josh and Sheva, and Jesse requests fanart of the boat ride out of the level with an explosion in the background, alligators spraying water, and Chris singing "Kiss the Girl" in a lobster costume (because of trademarks). The fans were happy to oblige.
  • They eventually decide Part 10 is some sort of "Sheva snuff film" given how often Cry dies as they struggle through the level's instant-death lasers.
    • The highlight may be the time Jesse manages to detonate a grenade Cry threw, in mid-air, with a rocket, thus getting around the game's usual Friendly Fireproof. It's actually kind of impressive.
      Jesse: It wasn't me! It wasn't me!
      Jesse: (laughs hysterically)
      Cry: (dies)
  • Part 11 starts with Cry shocking Jesse with a shock-pole.
  • In Part 13's fight against Wesker and a Brainwashed and Crazy Jill Valentine, it turns out shotgun shells aren't the best antidote for mind control.
    Jesse: Focus on Jill, focus on Jill!
    Cry: Focus on Jill, you sure?
    Jesse: Yeah-yeah-yeah, I'm gonna try and get her. Just keep shooting her with my shotty. (BLAM) I love you!
    Cry: Die, Jill, die- (Jill dies) Oh my God...
    Your Partner Died
    Jesse and Cry: (ten seconds of hysterical laughter)
    Cry: (still laughing) O-kay... don't focus on Jill. That's a no-go.
    Jesse: Look, my version of Chris let her go. When she sided with his arch-nemesis, he let her go. I'm just sayin'-
  • Part 15 has Jesse come across a document written by Wesker, and begins reading it out loud. He starts off reading it in an "evil" voice, only to change into an "evil old man voice", before finishing it up by reading it as Emperor Palpatine, complete with slipping in quotes from Return of the Jedi. That's funny. Then it gets hilarious when Jesse suddenly remembers a detail about Cry he learned in the last part:
    Jesse: You don't even know these jokes! You've never seen Star Wars! God damn it! God damn it, you don't even know what I'm talking about! This is all lost on you!
    Cry: (giggling profusely) Yup!
    • They try to end the boss fight against Excella with an appropriate Pre-Mortem One-Liner, but have trouble coming up with a good quote at the proper timing. Cry's delivery of "You're fired!" is perfect but the boss doesn't go down, "You'll never seek employment in this town again!" doesn't work either, so in the end...
      Cry: (dramatic voice) Excella? You're wasted - fuck! (has to break off to deal with blobs)
      Jesse: That's terrible! You got hit 'cause that's terrible!
      Cry: (dramatic voice) Let's get wasted!
      Jesse: What, no-
      (coup de grace cutscene)
  • Early in the finale, Jesse is being swarmed by enemies, but Cry tries to save him with a cunning ambush.
    Cry: Okay, come on down, I dropped a proximity bomb-
    Jesse: (picks up the proximity mine)
    Cry: -so that when they come down-
    Jesse: I picked it up for some reason! Why did I do that?!
    Cry: (as they're both gunned down) God dammit, it was perfectly set!
    Jesse: It was loot on the ground! I just reacted!
    • Jesse continues to be frustrated by Cry's limited cinematic knowledge.
      Jesse: Ready?
      Cry: (sigh) I'm scared man. I'm scared.
      Jesse: You know what? You should be. You should be. That was my Yoda. (Beat) You wouldn't know what that is, either! God damn you, Cry!
      Cry: No, no, I know, actually, about the Yoda. I know that he went to, uh-
      Jesse: You called him "The Yoda." You called him "The Yoda."
      Cry: H-he was, Yoga was in Dagobah, and fuckin'-
      Jesse: "Yoga?" "Yoga?!" Yoga was in Dagobah?!
      Cry: Yoda was in Dagobah, and fuckin', he was in a swamp, and Luke was just like, "Man, how's it fuckin' goin', my uncle's treatin' me like a scruffy Nerf-herder."
      Jesse: I'm not okay with this. I'm not okay with this.
      Cry: (cracking up) I'm sorry.
    • During the first fight with Wesker, Cry attemps to distract him so that Jesse can shoot him in the back with a rocket. Jesse fires the rocket, but at the last second, Wesker dodges, which causes the rocket to hit Cry in the face.
    • They fail the QTEs in the plane with Wesker so often that...
      Cry: Okay, alright, we got this.
      Jesse: Here we go now.
      Cry: We are masters now. (beat) So wait, I fucked up on these, but now you have also fucked up on these, so-
      Jesse: Technically I fucked-up twice, so don't... no, we're still even. My neck was twisted backwards, we're definitely even.
      Cry: I sacrificed myself for the world!
      Jesse: And that's so brave of you, but my neck got twisted backwards.
    • Jesse's okay with the final level being inside an active volcano's caldera, because he knows that's where the eagles will come to rescue them. Sure enough, "Best Boyfriend" and Jill show up in a helicopter for the finale.
    • Even after Wesker is finally killed, Jesse and Cry still have their fingers on their keyboards waiting for one last QTE to screw them over.
    • At the very end, as the heroes fly off into the sunrise, Jesse still has trouble with timing.
      Jesse: And now, cue J-Pop song, go.
      Cry: Please. Please.
      Jesse: And... go.
      Cry: Please.
      (still nothing)
      Jesse: And - I'll take a Wesker! Like, Wesker's like "I'll be back! In Resident Evil 7!"
      Cry: "Chrissssss!"
      Jesse: Wouldn't that be amazing, if Resident Ev-
      (distinctly non-Japanese singing finally starts)
      Jesse: Close enough, close enough.
      Cry: I think that's African, isn't it?
      Jesse: You know what? I wanted some type of music, I got some type of music. We're good.
      Cry: Yeah, it's Africa-Pop.
      Jesse: A-Pop.

     The Infectious Madness of Doctor Dekker 
  • Jesse and Dodger begin the game, and their first interview is with Marianna, who immediately tells them about how she keeps being picked up by the police... for public nudity.
    Jesse: Dodger, hold my hand.
    • Dodger goes on to ask "How nude we talkin'", with Jesse barely containing his lust.
  • The beginning parts of their interview with Nathan, wherein Jesse mistypes "Hello Nathan" and ends up with "Hell Nathan," which the game actually acknowledges as a real question.
  • One of the patients mentions playing World of Warcraft. Jesse asks them a very long technical question about the game that of course includes his theory that Jaina is a Dreadlord.

     Sniper Elite 4 w/ Sips 
  • Their unrestrained glee whenever one of them gets in a really good shot, especially if it involves knocking the guy's helmet off.
  • Deciding that their characters are giving each other mouth-to-mouth when healing each other.
  • Jesse and Sips' epic quest to take Hitler out with a testicle shot. They eventually succeed in the most epic way.

    Dishonored 2 
  • Pretty much any moment involving Fishy the fish head.
  • In part 24, while Jesse is skulking around the Howler's HQ, several uses of sleep darts result in the unconscious victim's body doing something weird.
  • During part 26, Jesse is spying on some maids in the kitchen, only to watch one knock over a pot and walk away, confounding Jesse.

    Cuphead w/ Crendor 

    God Of War w/ The Completionist 
  • In part three, they get to a boss that kills them multiple times. So Jesse decides to play it out like a World of Warcraft raid.
    Jesse: More dots. More dots. More dots.
  • In part 16, Jesse and Jirard are reunited with the Blades of Chaos. They keep squeeing over the nostalgia and awesomeness.

    Fan Fridays 
The Fan Fridays are hilarious in and of themselves, as it seems the fans doing the suggesting seem to make it a point to find the craziest games imaginable for him to play. Some particularly good moments, however:

  • Jesse's reactions to realizing he's playing a girl in Hatoful Boyfriend. Which also makes his not using the name Cox Hilarious in Hindsight.
  • The end of the I Wanna Be the Guy Gaiden video.
    * dies*
    Jesse: *furiously pounds on desk*
    • Even better is the apparent reason the screen flipped on him at the end. All throughout the video was a notice about a new patch to the game, warning retribution if you didn't download it. When the screen flips, you see at the bottom, upside down, the text "What part of get the patch do you not understand".
  • Part 2 of that Fan Friday has him playing Slender, and freaking out within seconds before he's even done anything. By the end...
    I've never been so afraid of grass rendering in my entire damn life.
    • That is followed shortly after by momentary distortion and Jesse staring at the screen in silent horror for a good ten seconds.
  • From The Political Machine Rematch with Crendor: Hipster Lincoln! Jesse laughs for nearly 20 seconds straight before he can come up with a coherent response.
    • Any of Crendor's characters seems to be able to do the trick. The same thing happens in the final battle.
  • Before even watching the video: the preview thumbnail for Jesse's 9/27/12 "Revenge of the Q&A" shows Jesse wearing a Bane mask from The Dark Knight Rises. Jesse is inordinately fond of his Bane-slash-Deckard Cain impersonation.
  • In his second attempt at FTL, Jesse gets boarded by an attacker with the same name as one of his recently deceased crew members. ATREYU!!!
  • Jesse is bad at farming.
    • Most of the video is Jesse failing to stop in time to pick up passengers, rambling about nothing in particular, and finally deciding to just screw it and try to derail the train. He manages to do so, AND THE TRAIN GOES THROUGH A BRIDGE.
  • The Fan Friday featuring Katawa Shoujo. Pretty much all of it, but highlights include his consistent mispronunciation of the Japanese words, the cartoonish voices he gives the characters such as the teacher Mutou, and his reaction to realizing just what kind of game he's playing.
    (to the viewers who requested this game) Oh God... you dicks... you dicks... is this a game where a kid with arrhythmia actively tries to bang disabled girls? *sigh* Look, I'm gonna make the best of this but if any of you assholes out there who are gonna start writing me like "Jesse you're making humorous comments about disabled students." This is on you. This is on you, for making me play this!
    • Also, his comment on the video itself, that suggested that he kept playing and wound up getting the Bad Ending.
      So I went ahead and played a bit more today just to see about the possibility of "more". I played for 2 hours and was given 2 additional choices :P Spoiler I failed at each. I'm not sure I have it in me to suck at hitting on girls in anything but real life :P
  • The Ship: Murder Party Fan "Frunday" is pretty much wall-to-wall hilarity. One of the best parts has to be when they start off playing a regular version of the game and Jesse finds himself on the hunt for Dora A. bin-Laden. Then they switch over to "World Leaders" mode server, a mod where the players must hunt down and kill various world leaders. Among them is a certain other bin-Laden. Jesse is in hysterics when he finds this out.
    • "Hey George, I hear you've been looking for me!"
    • The video was made not long after Margaret Thatcher passed away. She's one of the characters in the game mode. This being The Ship, this creates some awkward moments. Meanwhile, omzit runs through the corridors calling for Thatcher's blood whenever he gets her as a target. So many Dude, Not Funny! comments are made that one player goes so far as to suggest they ought to just make it the title, and is part of the reason Jesse calls it "The Most Offensive Game Ever".
  • During the Fan Friday of Game Dev Tycoon, Jesse's hastily thrown together Take That, Critics! is his most successful game to date, cracking him up. Earlier, his most successful game was "Last Hope" (which inadvertently mirrored Square's history with the original Final Fantasy).
    • Later on, as he starts a real playthrough, it becomes clear that he is the worst namer of games on the planet—his process is just vomiting out words that sorta-kinda fit the theme and rolling with it, even the misspellings.
      Jesse: Do not... do NOT let me name a child!
    • His Game Dev Tycoon Let's Play ends abruptly when his MMO's maintenance costs exceed its profits. It's abrupt because it happens within the span of around a minute, and it's hilarious because he had around a billion dollars in the bank before he went under.
  • Jesse plays Knights of Pen and Paper, a game about a group of people playing a traditional Tabletop RPG together. By the end of the video, Jesse's group members include Grandma the paladin, a hipster mage, and Woofie the cleric.
  • In the Ride to Hell: Retribution video, Jesse comes across a truck he has to powerslide under. After multiple failed attempts (because the game is telling him to push what he thinks is the up arrow, when it means shift), he simply drives around the damn thing. And then there's his reaction to the sex scenes.
  • Goat Simulator. The whole damn thing.
  • Near the end of Volgarr The Viking, Jesse declares that if he can just finish the level, he'll be happy. He finally reaches the top of the fortress... and meets the first boss. he doesn't finish the level.
    Jesse: Son of a bitch!
  • Five Nights at Freddy's: The Deadpool cupcake, and Jesse absentmindedly playing with the lights during the intro if you know how the game works You're supposed to manage your resources so that the power lasts all night. Jesse just wasted a whole bunch of it..
    • Inevitably the video ends when Freddy gets Jesse, who is trying to sing along with his song in an attempt to survive. He is interrupted mid-song and screams and babbles in terror before pausing.
  • The entirety of the Rocket League video, but especially Crendor's dedication to scoring a goal by bicycle kick. He succeeds beautifully in the final match.
  • At the end of the Pro Gamer Manager video, Jesse pulls off a screaming Rage Quit at the game's unfairness... and screams so loud it's picked up by Dodger livestreaming in a separate room.
    Dodger:'s Jesse screaming "I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't do anything. What the fuck." over and over and over again. I think he's playing Heroes. I assume he's playing Heroes. I don't know what else he would be doing.
    • And then Jesse bursts into said room to yell about the game some more.
  • After Jesse finds all the secret cutscenes in Pony Island, with help from his Twitch chat, he decides he's going to save the game on a flash drive forever. It would be spoilery to explain why if you haven't watched/played the game, but let's just say this decision resulted in the chat chanting at Jesse to FREE SATAN. And then he had said chat invade Dodger's Diablo stream with said chants.

Non-Video Game Moments

  • Jesse, whilst helping Rosanna Pansino film an episode of Nerdy Nummies, accidentally dropped one of the cupcakes. Large Ham ensues.
  • A Running Gag throughout the The Gamestation's Free For All of Chivalry: Medieval Warfare has Jesse shouting his Battle Cry of "FALRAK IS A DOOB!!!!", followed by epic music, usually followed shortly by the music abruptly halting (sometimes with Record Needle Scratch) when Jesse dies. Made funnier later on when Jesse uses a completely different theme after the Falrak-cry.
  • The 27th TGS Podcast in which Jesse serenades Felicia Day, who he has been a Stalker with a Crush towards for some time. Hilarity Ensues.
    Felicia: I've got to admire the effort...
    TotalBiscuit: I've got to be slightly terrified by the effort.
    Felicia: It's restraining-level order effort, like, restraining-order level effort.
  • Podcast #39 Jesse is introduced to Irn-Bru.
    Jesse: This stuff is like liquid meth!
    • The combination of Irn-Bru and a Boost candy bar also may have contributed to the now-legendary SqueEnix rant.
    Jesse: I'm sorry! Make a new game, you psychopaths! No one wants to play XIII — that was an unliked game to begin with! Where's Final Fantasy XV? Make that! We saw your tech demo! YOU'VE GOT DRAGONS AND SHIT! WHERE IS THAT?! This is garbage! You are such a letdown! Jesus H. Christ, you are bad! What happened to you? You were so good... You are f— you — you are the George Lucas of video games! STOP IT! STOP IT!! You're killing me inside!
  • Podcast #29 had Jimquisition as a guest and as they're talking about a rather old game, it quickly degenerates to them poking fun at "old tech". Hilariously animated.
  • For his fourth round in the TGS Blood Bowl League Jesse convinces both himself and The Completionist to engage in an increasingly elaborate drinking game. Guess how this turned out.
  • TGS Podcast 50, while discussing his past as a teacher, Jesse tells a story in which he went back to his old school to apologize for his past Class Clown behavior, having gained a whole new appreciation for what teachers deal with. Security had been upped since he was there last, resulting in him being accosted by a guard and taken to the office. The office secretary's reaction: "Back in the office again, eh, Cox?"
  • TGS Podcast 52, Jesse describing the Dungeons & Dragons game he and Dodger played while at Gemucon.
    Jesse: By hobgoblin law!
  • TGS Podcast 61, TB, Jesse, Dodger and Crendor spend the last 10 minutes discussing a bad porno game.
  • Almost the entirety of the Guns of Icarus Online match is hilarious, but this exchange on Jesse's ship took the cake.
    Jesse: You can shake each other's dongs later. Lets go!
    Cry: Dongs! What the hell did I miss?!
    Jesse: Well... Dodger found a mystical potion and...
    Dodger: What?
    Cry: Ahhh... Futa. I understand.
  • During Dodger's 12 Hour live-stream, Jesse gets very... excited, when he learns that Husky hasn't played Left 4 Dead 2.
    Jesse, effeminately: HUUUUUSSSSKY. COME AND PLAY!
    Husky: What.
  • During Jesse's livestream of Secret of Mana, he constantly makes everyone chant "FLAMEY! FLAMEY!" and banters with Strippin of the Yogscast who ends up being the only mod in the chat at some point.
    • They name the characters Suplex, LHorse (Lava Horse) and Dooger.
    • The Blue Whale joke. And even though it crosses the line way too many times, the Cinderblock joke told by Brofu.
    • Dodger's response to a question from chat. She would kill her old grandmother, marry her twin, and have sex with a guy who later turns out to be her son.
  • At one Blizzcon, Jesse asked Chris Metzen and Dave Kosak (the head of creative development and lead quest designer, respectively) about a giant snake tail in a World of Warcraft dungeon. They had no idea what he was talking about since it was just something the artists threw in, but Jesse even printed out a poster-sized image of a screenshot he took of the dang thing! Then, nearly two years later, Jesse is interviewing Dave Kosak and Kosak exclaims happily "You were the snake-tail guy!"
  • TB asks people to watch his Hearthstone vids so he will be more powerful than Miley Cyrus and Vevo, Jesse takes it to mean TB is going to twerk.
    • And right after they mention Hearthstone, Crendor shows up in the chat.
  • At Home with Uncle Wormy. The best part is that clearly, he's put some thought into his answer before making it.
  • "Talk like you're speaking language!"
  • "David Cage is a golden god!" Unsurprisingly, this has been raised to Memetic Mutation status. Type David Cage into Google and look at the suggestions.
  • Jesse's apparent lack of privacy in his apartment complex, seen as a series of people coming in from behind or off-camera. To date, the TGS/Co-Optional Podcast has been interrupted by his housecleaning service, a window washer, and the Marina del Rey fire department. Since Jesse works at home and is only seen from the waist up on the podcasts, he seldom wears pants, leading to interesting reactions.
  • Jesse attends Blizzcon dressed as Leah from Diablo III and spends the entire time speaking in a Valley Girl accent.
    • And Crendor and Total Biscuit are both shown playing with his hair... er, wig.
    • He even goes and asks a panel questions in character!
  • Jesse plays Day9 in Magic: The Gathering, and loses, to say the least.
    • Jesse putting on a random pointless accent while describing the creature he just played quickly morphs into a Running Gag about a drake flying around Europe picking up accents.
    • Day9 finally attacks Jesse, and the conversation devolves into Fantastic Racism against merfolk and eventually into Jesse just ranting about how useless all his options are. Day9 declares it the best block phase he's ever experienced.
    • Jesse consistently draws land cards and basically nothing else useful the entire game. After losing, he takes the top six cards from his remaining deck and slams them on the table. They're all land cards. Both crack up, with Jesse lamenting that they weren't playing Monopoly.
    Day9: You can't even cheat-[breaks into laughter]
  • The Co-Optional Podcast, Episode 18: Crendor's incredibly fake Polaris contract(s).
  • There's a Running Gag of Jesse eating foreign "trash snacks" on the Podcasts, stuff that tastes so off to people not-adjusted that it floors him. One particularly memorable time was when the candy came looking like a pill, even TB, who by this point knows how this ends but hasn't stopped it before, told Jesse not to do it. Then Jesse decided to just pour from the box, and his reaction makes you think it sent him into a convulsive fit.
  • Pretty much the entire trailer for Learning Curve
  • Jesse and TB host a special Christmas stream, where they play Depth, a game about sharks. TB constantly promises that Jesse gets to be the shark to own his fear, and then the game mode defaults to a King of the Hill-type mode where only one person at a time gets to be the shark...and Jesse freaks out.
  • In episode 74 of the Co-Optional Podcast it is brought up that there are machines in Japan that jack you off. Jesse immediately tries to learn more about these machines but the others start to drift towards another topic until finally Jesse seizes control and MAKES the podcast come back to it.
    Jesse: Whoa, whoa, where are these machines at? *Everyone keeps talking* Hold the phone! Hooold the phone! Where are these machines at, how do these machines work? *Everyone still continues to talk* No, no, no, no, no! Are these like...vending machines? *Talking* Are these vending machines!? *Even more talking* WHY ARE WE SKIPPING OVER THE JAPANESE FUCK MACHINES!? *Everyone loses it* No, no, no! No, no, no! You can't move on from that! There are machines! In Japan! That jerk you off!!! We are not moving on from this! I wanna know!
  • During the episode of New Canon Book Club Podcast where the boys review The Last Jedi, Jirard and Davis get into a discussion about plot holes and lore missing from the movie. This goes on for whole minutes where you can practically hear the foam dripping from their mouths as they argue with one another. Meanwhile, Jesse laughs like a madman in the background the whole time.
  • At Pyrkon (Polish fantasy convention) he tried to play "60 Seconds" but because of technical problems he needed to wait. To entertain everyone he asked questions. When he asked one person about his name and heard his name was Kuba (Polish name or short from Jakub) he was silent for like 5 seconds before the room was filled with his Big "WHAT?!". For another 10 minutes he couldn't believe that and when something went wrong he shout "It was you Kuba!? It's your fault!?"
    • Next day in a live Q&A he told everyone that all day he was in giggly humor because he heard that "kupa" is shit in Polish so "koopa troopas" are shit troopers.
  • While joining the New Canon Book Club for a Playthrough of Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order, over the course of this episode, Jesse started noticing blatantly strange things regarding the locale they were exploring, Ilum. The fact that Imperials were on the planet, the fact they had widespread mining, and most damning of all (and what set Jesse off), a massive artificial trench. The other voiced skepticism, but Jesse begged Davis, the one with the controller, to fly back to see the planet without a storm covering the surface. Jesse's reaction when the foundation for Starkiller Base's distinctive equatorial trench came into view was one thing, but Davis's indignant reaction just made it so much better.
    Jesse: Shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up!
    Davis: Goddammit. I'm so pissed. It doesn't even matter, because Starkiller doesn't even USE the Death Star shit, it sucks the fucking life, out of fucking SUNS!
  • New Canon Book Club play Star Wars: Squadrons, with Jesse at the controls. Because the game involves a Switching P.O.V. between two Player Characters, Jesse is allowed to customize and name both of them. He names one "Cesse Jox" and the second one "Josse Cex", which the others immediately declare to be "The most Star Wars names ever."

Alternative Title(s): OMFG Cata