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Creator / Jeff Goldblum

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"I now, more and more, appreciate when I'm in a group of good people and get to work in good movies and projects. I'm wildly grateful and appreciative."
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Describe JeHehheha reHA RAHA!

Jeffrey Lynn Goldblum (born October 22, 1952) is, uh, an American actor, uh, known for his portrayal, uh, of quirky/nerdy characters, as well as his, um, unique form of, uh, di-dialogue delivery, which, uh, has became one of the most memorable parts of his, uh, career, averting the, um, t-trope that Realistic Diction Is Unrealistic. He, uh, also is a f-frequent s-subject of internet memes going all the way back to the, um, late 1990s when a, uh, sc-sc-sc-screenshot from, uh, The Fly (1986) was given the, uh, caption "Jeff Goldblum is watching you poop!" Ah, uh, fame.

And he is, um, actually alive, despite what, uh, Google tells you. Same goes for, uh, Stephen Colbert and, uh, Goldblum himself, and, uh, yeah.

Checkmate.

Though, uh, typecast as white and, um, nerdy—NERDY eccentric intellectual types, Goldblum has, uh, been quite The Casanova in real life. His-his, uh, second wife was none other than, uh, Geena Davis, and he had a long—LONG-time relationship with, uh, actress Laura Dern, whom he met on-on-on the set of Jurassic Park.

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    He has, uh-um, appeared in such productions as (arranged alphabetically): 

Films

Television series:

  • Law & Order: Criminal Intent (Seasons 8 and 9)
  • Raines
  • Tenspeed and Brown Shoe
  • The World According to Jeff Goldblum, a forthcoming docuseries from National Geographic for the Disney+ streaming service

Television guest/recurring appearances:

Theatre

  • The Music Man (2004 Pittsburgh Civic Light Operanote  staging — the 2006 Mockumentary Pittsburgh is constructed around this actual production)
  • The Pillowman (2005 Broadway version)
  • The Prisoner of Second Avenue (2010 West End staging)
  • Two Gentlemen of Verona (1971 Broadway musical adaptation; as a chorus member, his first professional acting credit)

Tropes, ahem, commonly associated with Jeff Goldblum's work:

  • Actually Pretty Funny: He's quite amused by the parodies and memes he's inspired over the years, such as David Duchovny's impression of him in a "Celebrity Jeopardy" sketch on Saturday Night Live (which suggested that his verbal affectations were a cover for illiteracy) and the various goofs on the infamous Shirtless Scene in Jurassic Park.
  • Adam Westing: Frequently since the Turn of the Millennium.
    • In the Friends episode "The One with the Mugging", he plays Leonard Day, a fictional famed actor whom Joey is auditioning to star alongside, poking fun at his own acting style in the process. In what might be a gentle poke at Goldblum having served as a spokesman for Apple among other things, Joey accidentally offends the classically-trained Leonard by saying how much he loves the goofy cellphone commercials he does, Leonard declaring in response "I believe in those phones! I almost lost a cousin because of bad wireless service!" But upon realizing Joey is sincere, he relaxes and admits "Well, I do bring a certain credibility to the role."
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    • He frequently made early-in-the-episode The Colbert Report appearances, which usually ended with a blatant plug for Law & Order: Criminal Intent, as his tenure on that show was running concurrently with Report. Most famously, when Michael Jackson's death in June 2009 led to subsequent copycat rumors of Goldblum's death, he appeared to dispel the rumors...only to see Australian TV footage that reported his death as a fact. Upon realizing he was dead, he went on to deliver a eulogy for himself!
    • He was one of several Law & Order franchise alumni to appear in the Last Week Tonight with John Oliver spoof Law & Order: Civil Asset Forfeiture Unit.
    • A comic promotional video for Independence Day: Resurgence dispels the in-universe conspiracy theory that David Levinson and Jeff Goldblum are the same person by having them meet. While Levinson doesn't know much about Goldblum (confusing him with both Dabney Coleman and Bowser from Sha Na Na), Goldblum is a total fanboy, even praising Levinson's mahogany eyes!
    • A 2018 Jeep commercial (a Super Bowl Special) is built around the famous "Must go faster" chase from Jurassic Park, as the 25-years-older Goldblum imagines himself using the newest model to outwit the T-Rex.
    • The Alamo Drafthouse theater chain's "No Talking or Phones" Warning for Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom has him reveal that he's personally arranged for a velociraptor named Sheila to come for anyone in the audience who breaks the rules.
    • Samantha Bee's Holidays on ICE Christmas Special was promoted with a spoof of Love Actually's famous placard scene in which Bee accidentally visits Goldblum's house instead of that of an unnamed crush. Luckily she's an Ian Malcolm fangirl and ready to hit on him instead with those placards.
    • Participated in James Corden's ''Thor: Ragnarok 4D'' stunt along with the film's other principals. Speaking of Corden...
    • The cold open of the December 4, 2018 episode of The Late Late Show with James Corden has him being surprised but terribly flattered by the elaborate tribute "thank u, jeff", a spoof of Ariana Grande's "thank u, next" that heavily plays up his Mr. Fanservice image.
  • Advertising Campaigns: He has participated in quite a few of these, starting with serving as an Apple spokesman in the late 1990s as the company was making a major comeback with such things as the iMac. His work in these ranges from simple voiceovers to Adam Westing (for Jeep; see above) to playing original whimsical characters such as Brad Bellflower in a long-running Apartments.com campaign and, in a Tim & Eric-helmed ad for General Elecric, "Terry Quattro, Famous Person".
  • The Cast Showoff: invoked Whenever he has a chance to play the piano, such as in The Fly and Law and Order: Criminal Intent. He is very serious about this, and his longstanding weekly gig at the Rockwell club in Los Angeles was parlayed into an album of jazz standards, Jeff Goldblum and the Mildred Snitzer Orchestra: The Capitol Studios Sessions, in 2018.
  • Gibbering Genius: Starting with 1981's Threshold, in which he plays the designer of an artificial heart, he's played intense, fast-talking, realistically-dictioned men of science in both comic and dramatic contexts, among them Dr. Sidney Zweibel / New Jersey (neurosurgeon), Dr. Seth Brundle (inventor of teleportation technology / Professor Guinea Pig), Dr. Ian Malcolm (mathematician), David Levinson (satellite technician), and Professor Brody (Professor Guinea Pig for a cure for dog allergies). As several of these characters are among, and in Malcolm's case just plain is, his most beloved/popular, Goldblum has arguably become the patron saint of this trope.
  • Motor Mouth: Even if his given character isn't a Gibbering Genius, he may well be a fast talker. Such characters are often exposition-dumpers (Fay Grim), specialize in deception (Man of the Year), are trying to sell something (Harold Hill, some of his Portlandia characters), or are prone to being excitable/flustered (Jack Bellicec).
  • Mr. Fanservice: Just look at the above picture from Jurassic Park, just one of the films he's appeared in that have presented him as an object of the Female Gaze. This article argues that his being a shining example of "geek sexiness" in sci-fi and horror filmmaking is one of the keys to his enduring popularity.
  • Older Than They Look: His hair may have gone grey, but he still looks pretty good for someone born in 1952. In fact, the grey just made "Silver Fox" a popular descriptive term for him in the fanbase.
  • Verbal Tic: He tends to stutter and "um" and "uh" while speaking (an affectation known as fumfering). Lends to a bit of irony to casting him as Aaron, the brother of Moses, in The Prince of Egypt, as in the original book, Moses begs for Aaron to speak for him because he lacks his stutter.

"And, uh, like that, we didn't expect a troper to suddenly-suddenly reach the end of this page. Here I am now by myself, um, talking to myself. That's-that's Chaos Theory."

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