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Film / Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie

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"C'mon! Just see the film, it's not the end of the world. You go see see, you check it out, there's a coup — a bunch of good laughs in it, and, uh, if you go see it and see the whole movie and stay to the very end, you get a $10 gift certificate to Walden Books."

A 2012 comedy film from Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim, the stars and creators of Tom Goes to the Mayor and Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!. The film stars the titular duo, playing twisted versions of themselves, as two filmmakers who are given a record setting 1 billion dollar budget by the Schlaaang Corporation to make a movie.

After wasting the money on superfluous things (i.e. a $500,000 personal trainer, real diamonds, paying Johnny Depp's salary to a Johnny Depp impersonator, etc.) and signing a bad contract, they find themselves owing the corporation the money. After seeing an advertisement with Damian Weebs (Will Ferrell) looking for somebody to run his mall, with the promise they will make a billion dollars, Tim and Eric decide to take the job. While trying to refurbish the mall, they must deal with vagrants (ex. a man-child named Taquito), bizarre stores (ex. Reggie's Used Toilet Paper Discount Warehouse), and a man-eating wolf that stalks the food court.

Also features John C. Reilly, Zach Galifianakis, Ray Wise, Jeff Goldblum, Will Forte and a host of others, most of whom appeared on the duo's TV show.

A sequel called Tim and Eric's Trillion Dollar Movie has been confirmed.

This goof and a spoof contains examples of:

  • After the End: When Tim and Eric arrive in the S'Wallow Valley Mall, the conditions are very post-apocalyptic, with Taquito living in his own constructed cave with custom machines and a toilet made from a bucket and spare toilet parts.
  • As Himself: In addition to the titular duo it's played straight with James Quall, Robert Axelrod, David Liebe Hart, Tenessee Winston Luke and Michael Gross. Subverted by Johnny Depp and Steven Spielberg who are both played by impersonators and with Jeff Goldblum playing a spokesman in the opening segment named Chef Goldblum.
  • Binge Montage: After the disaster of their billion dollar movie, Tim and Eric decide to go partying to ease the tension, first getting drunk, then doing cocaine off of women's chests, then getting high, and finally Tim gets his arm chopped off while Eric gets his penis pierced.
  • Bittersweet Ending: Tim and Eric save the S'Wallow Valley Mall and stop the Schlaaang Corporation, but Katie and Jeffery die, as does Jeffery's real father and Alan Bishopman after finally having a change of heart, and Tim and Eric are sentenced to death for the deaths of everyone involved. Though, this is only the film-within-a-film, as Tim and Eric get a normal Happy Ending for getting Steven Spielberg's approval for the film.
  • Bland-Name Product: The Tetnis poster in Taquito's "house".
  • Blatant Lies: The "Actual Billionares" from the S'Wallow Valley Mall commercial.
  • Book Ends: The film begins with a film-within-a-film, Bonjour, Diamond Jim, and then cuts to the reaction of the Schlaaang Corporation. It ends with cutting from the film-within-a-film, the entire previous plot, to the reaction of Steven Spielberg.
  • Boom, Headshot!: Katie dies this way.
  • Break the Haughty: Alan Bishopman after the Schlaaang Corporation find Tim and Eric and decide to kill him, too.
  • Breaking the Fourth Wall: At one point, they stop mid-fight to talk to the audience about their unique sense of humor, wishing they could have added a laugh track, but couldn't since it's a motion picture.
  • Budget-Busting Element: In-Universe. A big reason the Show Within a Show Bonjour, Diamond Jim cost a billion dollars to make was because Tim and Eric insisted on having the protagonist wear a suit covered in thousands of genuine diamonds. It ate up so much of the budget that they could only afford to shoot three minutes of footage, and they had to cast a Celebrity Impersonator as Diamond Jim instead of the real Johnny Depp.
  • Butt-Monkey: Jeffery's father, who has his used toilet paper business shut down, his son is taken away from him by Tim, and finally, he is shot and blown up by the Schlaaang Corporation.
  • Captain Obvious: Dobis P.R.'s plan to save the mall:
  • Chekhov's Gun: A number of the shops come into play as the film approaches the 2/3rds mark, especially the sword shop, which gives Tim and Eric the weapons they need to take down Schlaaang.
  • Corrupt Corporate Executive: Tommy Schlaaang.
    • Despite successfully renovating the S'Wallow Valley Mall, Tim and Eric for their numerous Kick the Dog moments.
    • Damien Weebs, the former owner of the S'Wallow Valley Mall.
  • Credits Gag: At the beginning of the Bonjour, Diamond Jim there is a cavalcade of production company logos that are all obviously subsidiaries of the Schlaaang Corporation with Schlaaang in their names. Played again right after when Tim & Eric's names appear incessantly under many different titles, ending with their directing credit staying onscreen long enough to border on Overly Long Gag.
  • Died Standing Up: All of the Schlaaang goons in the final battle, still holding their guns, but without their heads.
  • The Dreaded: The Wolf and Yogurt Man.
  • Easily Forgiven: Subverted with Allen as Eric murders him almost immediately after he decides to help them out.
    • Played straight between Tim and Eric, even after Tim sleeps with Katie.
  • Eiffel Tower Effect: The first shot from Bonjour, Diamond Jim has the Eiffel Tower.
  • Excuse Plot: The plot basically exists an empty vessel meant to contain all the weird shit in the film.
  • invoked Fight Scene Failure: Invoked in the fight between Tim and Eric after Tim drugs Eric to get him away from Katie, only for Tim to have sex with her while he's stuck in the Shrim Alternative Healing Center. It begins fairly realistic, but pretty soon, the punches no longer connect, and they begin doing things that resemble dance moves more than actual fight moves.
  • Expy: Since it's not an official [adult swim] film, Tim and Eric had to invent new characters to take the place of the Awesome Show ones...
    • Schlaaang Corporation = Cinco Corporation
    • Taquito (played by John C. Reilly) = Steve Brule with a dash of Casey Tatum.
    • Jim Joe Kelly (played by Zach Galifianakis) = Tairy Greene, only now as a poet and spiritual guru.
    • Averted with James Quall and the cameo by David Leibe Hart. Will Forte is cast in a role similar to his other roles on Awesome Show.
  • Fan Disservice: Tim and Eric removing their tight leather vests in their hotel room, with slow-motion close-ups their fat bellies popping out. To say nothing of Tim's sex scene with Katie, where she shoves a number of objects up his ass and watches as he fucks an inflatable sex doll. All while Eric is doused in human feces.
  • The Film of the Series: Sort of. Its related to the show in the same way that Monty Python and the Holy Grail is related to Monty Python's Flying Circus. It features a lot of the same actors and the same style of humor but none of the show's recurring characters and it has an actual plot, albeit one riddled with bizarre scenes that could stand on their own, as opposed to being a series of sketches.
  • Fish out of Water: Two Hollywood actors become public relations managers for a mall so they can pay back a major corporation, but they do a surprisingly good job at it until that corporation comes out for blood.
  • Heel–Face Turn: Alan Bishopman, after the Schlaaang goons fire on him.
    • Heel–Face Door-Slam: As soon as Bishopman gives his swords to Tim and Eric to fight Schlaaang, Eric slashes Alan's throat for causing this mess.
  • Heroic Sacrifice: Played for Laughs, As their last stand plan Tim throws his "son" Jeffrey at the gunmen as a distraction; naturally the gunmen go out of their way to focus fire on the unarmed flying child. This gives Tim and Eric the opening to throw their swords, decapitating the gunmen, just as young Jeff explodes in a shower of blood and flame. Tim knew Jeffrey would be able to do it, because he was after all, "the best son I've ever had".
    • Taquito straps pizza slices to himself to lure the wolf out, then as it mauls him he grabs it and leaps to the bottom floor to kill them both. Unfortunately, Taquito survives in excruciating pain as Weeb tries multiple times to put him out of his misery.
  • Horrible Judge of Character: Tim and Eric to Damien Weebs, who cannot tell Tim and Eric they'll earn a billion dollars running the mall without giving a sarcastic wink. They trust him anyway, seconds before he skips town.
  • "I Am" Song: Dobis P.R.'s Intro Theme, but they never actually get around to actually describing what they do.
    • Taquito gets one in his introduction, explaining the backstory of both himself and the mall, but it's mainly used as a distraction for Damien Weebs to skip town.
    • Instant Death Bullet: Averted with Taquito's death by Mercy Kill, Damien tries shooting him to put him out of his misery, only to find out each bullet only makes it worse and he has to shoot him several times. When told to shoot him in the head, Damien says no, opting for an open-casket funeral.
  • Jerkass: Alan Bishopman, owner of the sword shop who gets paid not to sell swords.
  • Kick the Dog: The Shlaaang Corporation and the heroes both get a number of these, its mainly played for laughs though.
  • Laugh Track: At one point, they break the fourth wall to say they wish they could use one, but can't since it's a major motion picture.
  • Love at First Sight: Eric falls in love with Katie when he first sees her in the commercial for the S'Wallow Valley Mall.
  • Love Triangle: Tim and Eric with Katie Hill.
  • Makeover Montage: Inverted. Tim and Eric get a montage where they get rid of their expensive Hollywood makeovers so they can become PR businessmen.
  • The Man Behind the Curtain: Yogurt Man is really Taquito in disguise, trying to scare off PR people like Tim and Eric.
  • Manchild: Taquito was literally Raised by Wolves and is dressed in clothing for little boys well into middle age. He's very sweet and well-meaning but sickly and stunted due to his neglectful upbringing.
  • MegaCorp: Sclaaang Corporation, which is an Expy for Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!'s Cinco Family.
  • Mercy Kill: Damien shoots Taquito after being mortally wounded by the Wolf, only to find he doesn't die on the first shot.
  • Mirror Character:
    • Tim and Eric, two slackers with skewed priorities, skip town on the Schlaaang Corporation after letting a billion dollar movie go to waste, leaving the missing billion dollars as their problem. Then they meet Damien Weebs, a slacker with skewed priorities, who then skips town after Tim and Eric show interest in running the mall, leaving it as their problem. However, they actually renovate the mall, and if the Schlaaang Corporation hadn't intervened, it could have been quite successful.
    • Alan Bishopman doesn't want Tim and Eric running the mall because he hates change, and if customers come, then he won't be paid by the city to not sell swords. Then, when Tim and Eric confront Yogurt Man, it turns out to really by Taquito in disguise, who's just as scared of the mall changing as Bishopman is.
  • Mushroom Samba: Eric has one when Tim gives him Spanish Fly.
  • No Good Deed Goes Unpunished: In the finale, Tim and Eric kill the Schlaaang Corporation in revenge for everyone who died and to save the mall, but they are then arrested for the deaths of everyone involved and sentenced to death.
  • Nosebleed: Eric gets one when talking to Katie for the first time.
  • Off with His Head!: The ENTIRE Schlaaang Corporation after Tim and Eric throw swords at them in the final battle, still in the poses they were shooting in.
  • Orange/Blue Contrast: Played for Laughs, near the end of the film when they kill the Schlaaang gang.
  • Orphan's Ordeal: Semi-subverted. Poor Jeffrey. He may not be a true orphan, but his dadis too spineless to stop Tim from adopting him as his own son in the space of a 40 second conversation. Sure, Tim's loving and all, but there is that bit where he uses young Jeff as bait for the gunmen, killing Jeffrey.
    • The commentary by Tim and Eric explain that Jeffrey was little more than a status symbol to Tim.
  • Overly Long Gag: Tim and Eric watching Top Gun, Jim Joe Kelly's whining/singing, Taquito's death.
  • The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: Despite owning a sword store, Allen Bishopman is EXTREMELY emphatic about NOT selling swords.
    Allen: I sell two swords a year, I'm good. I sell no swords a year, I'm even better. You see, S'wallow Valley wants to keep swords off the streets, and they pay me a monthly fee to NOT sell any swords!
  • Pungeon Master: James Quall's standup routine during his appearances is made up entirely of bread puns.
    "I've just come from Hollywood where they have all these famous personalities like Bread Pitt and Robert Breadford."
  • Rank Scales with Asskicking: Both Schlaaang and Dobis PR, especially in the final battle.
  • Rasputinian Death: Taquito's.
  • Rewarded as a Traitor Deserves: Alan Bishopman alerts the Schlaaang Corporation of Tim and Eric's wherabouts, only to get nearly gunned down by them when they arrive.
  • Shoot the Shaggy Dog: In the end, Tim and Eric defeat the Schlaaang Corporation, but every other character in the movie besides Weebs is dead, and a line of text appears after the final battle saying that Tim and Eric were executed for the deaths of every person who died through the movie. This is all made even worse by the fact that during the finale, Eric nonchalantly mentions that they had a billion dollars worth of diamonds but doesn't seem to connect it with the fact that this would solve all their problems.
  • Rule of Cool: The bread restaurant, where even the silverware is made out of bread. And you get stand up comedy while you eat by James Quall, making bread puns.
  • Scenery Gorn: The S'Wallow Valley Mall when Tim and Eric first arrive.
  • Scenery Porn: Paris in Bonjour, Diamond Jim.
  • Severely Specialized Store: The S'Wallow Valley Mall is full of them, like Reggie's Used Toilet Paper Discount Warehouse. Tim and Eric's plan to save the mall includes getting rid of these kinds of shops that don't work.
  • Show Within a Show: Bonjour, Diamond Jim Also, the film itself.
  • Sugar Bowl: Paris in Bonjour, Diamond Jim.
  • Toilet Humour: Shrim. Sounds like Shrimp. It's Tim and Eric, so we can guess that this holistic therapy is going to be something unpleasant. Of course, it reaches new levels when you find that it's not just poop-related, but a diarrhea bath. Young boys' diarrhea. That they poop on you. Y'know, to heal you, with their purity. To ease the potential Nausea Fuel, Eric confirms it was made of warm soy milk and oatmeal and was actually quite relaxing to sit in.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: Taquito and taquitos. Also Dr. Struts' sons and their diet of the "finest, softest meats."
  • A Tragedy of Impulsiveness: The moment they realize the billion dollar movie was a waste, Tim and Eric decide to get trashed, and then, while drunk and high, decide to go into PR to save a mall to earn a billion dollars. However, near the very end of the film, Tim and Eric remember they had a billion dollars worth in diamonds left over from the Diamond Jim movie, but by this point, the Schlaaang Corporation is out to kill Tim, Eric, and possibly destroy the S'Wallow Valley Mall, so they decide to fight back anyway.
  • Throwing Your Sword Always Works: In the climatic battle, Tim and Eric throw Alan Bishopman's swords to stop the Schlaaang Corporation.
  • Violence Really Is the Answer: The end battle between Schlaaang and Tim and Eric has Schlaaang armed with rifles and a machine gun while Tim and Eric have swords. Subverted when an ending title reveals Tim and Eric were sentenced to death for the deaths of everyone who died at the mall.
  • Vulgar Humor: All over the place, but the crowning moment of vulgarity happens when the film intercuts between Tim having over-the-top sex with Katie in a sex toy shop while Eric is stuck in the Shrim Alternative Healing Center after being drugged by Tim, trapped in a bathtub while up to his head in diarrhea.
  • Xtreme Kool Letterz: During the original S'Wallow Valley Mall commercial: "It's E-Z! Not hard."