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Can't Bathe Without a Weapon

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"Ask me if I want a towel one... more... time..."

"Yeah, except my gun's all soapy. Pretty stupid to bathe with a gun...."
Archer
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When a character is bathing it's not unusual for someone to barge in on them, or for them to be interrupted by something, or for something to attack them. But then said bather suddenly pulls out a gun to try to shoot the intruder. Or draw a blade and try to stab them, if firearms aren't an option. This indicates that the bather is an anticipator, Crazy-Prepared or Properly Paranoid type of person that does not like to feel vulnerable. They also usually don't have modesty as a priority.

The weapon is normally just placed within reach of said bather, but sometimes they may simply produce it from Hammerspace. This commonly happens in Outdoor Bath Peeping scenarios, but can also happen in Shower, Furo or Bathtub Scenes.

If Played for Laughs this can result in the intruder suffering a Pervert Revenge Mode or Unprovoked Pervert Payback from the armed bather. If it's Played for Drama a Full-Frontal Assault between bather and the intruder is likely to take place.

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If the bather improvises something in the area as a weapon see Improvised Weapon. If they employ their towel as said weapon, see Cloth Fu. If the bather starts throwing random objects at the intruder, see Tantrum Throwing. If their clothes, weapons, or equipment are stolen from them while they're bathing see Gone Swimming, Clothes Stolen.

See also Pillow Pistol for a character that keeps a weapon under the pillow as they sleep and Hidden Supplies for keeping hidden stashes of supplies and Where's My Gun? for a character struggling to find their weapon in a tense situation.


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Examples

    open/close all folders 

    Anime & Manga 

    Comic Books 

    Fan Works 

    Films — Live-Action 
  • In the 2018 film An Acceptable Loss, Libby is so Crazy-Prepared she keeps a loaded gun within arm's reach even while she bathes, as she thinks she has both a stalker and the government coming after her.
  • In the Barb Wire movie with Pamela Anderson, Barb bathes with a gun nearby. When her ex comes in, she prepares to shoot him.
  • John Wayne has done this in at least one Western, Big Jake. There's a Shower Scene, and he knows someone's after him, so he keeps a shotgun in the shower. When the guy comes in to kill him, Jake has the shotgun in his hands and uses it to shoot through the thin wooden door of the shower stall.
  • Deadpool 2: Not that it helps them, but the Yakuza that Deadpool ambushes in a public bathhouse all bring up katanas from under the water to fight.
  • An unnamed blond girl from Doomsday pulls out a shotgun while still in her bathtub and shoots.
  • Firefox offers a shower example: while bathing for the title plane's maiden flight, the protagonist talks to a mission command officer, without leaving his pistol. (Justified for two reasons: he's an American sent there to hijack the Firefox... and he's Clint Eastwood.)
  • In Ghost Rock, Jenya Lano does this in her bathtub with two pistols. She then gets out and walks all over the saloon naked, shooting all the intruders.
  • The Good, the Bad and the Ugly: A vengeful man, whom Tuco had previously shot in the hand and permanently disabled, catches the "Ugly" naked in a bathtub. He delivers a long speech about how he tracked Tuco down, and how he had lots of time to learn to shoot with his left hand... which is cut off when Tuco shoots him with a gun hidden under the bathtub bubbles.
    Tuco: When you have to shoot, shoot, don't talk.
  • Gunless: Sean is taking a bath in the Chinese laundry and appears to be asleep in the tub. The young girl Adell enters to bring him food. He suddenly stand bolt upright in the tub pointing his gun in her face.
  • Gunmen: When Parker and Servigo arrive at Bennett's house and finds her bathing, she greets them with a Sawed-Off Shotgun that she pulls from inside her bathtub.
  • James Bond:
    • In The Man with the Golden Gun, Andrea Anders pulls a gun on James Bond when he walks in on her showering.
      James Bond: [not surprised at all] A water pistol?
    • Bond himself pulls a similar trick in GoldenEye when Xenia attacks him while he's having a leisurely swim at his hotel. He retrieves his gun from alongside his towel once out of the pool and sets it down when Xenia begins to kiss him. Conveniently, it disappears when Onatopp starts crushing him to death, presumably as not to ruin the tension and provide a too-easy ending to the fight.
  • Averted at the end of the Maverick movie. Twice. However, both those times were deliberate. the first was a setup to reveal that Cooper is actually Maverick's dad and the second time because Maverick wanted the money to be stolen by Annabelle because "it's going to be a whole lot of fun getting it back!"
    Cooper: There's a half a million dollars in that satchel over there and your gun is eight feet away from you. Not smart. Not smart at all.
  • Naked Killer: In the opening scene, Femme Fatale assassin The Princess, is showering in her target's room, a bodybuilder who has cheated on his girlfriend. When said target hears someone in his shower and pulls open the shower curtain to reveal the Princess's Toplessness from the Back he demands outraged who she is and what she's doing in his bathroom. She nonchalantly tells him she "likes to shower before doing her job" and then whips out a pistol and proceeds to shoot all of his limbs until he's crawling on the floor, before finishing him off with a final shot in his crotch.
  • In the Onechanbara Vortex live-action film, a zombie sneaks up on Aya while she showers, she wraps herself in a Modesty Towel and picks up her pair of blades and proceeds to easily cut the intruder in half.
  • Every single man in the tubs in Sao Feng's bathhouse does this in Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. "WEAPONS!"
  • In the 1979 French crime drama film The Police War, Police inspector Marie Garcin is shown to keep her weapon at hand even while she showers.
  • Revenge (2017): When Richard returns to the house after searching the desert for Jen, he takes his shotgun with him when he goes to take a shower. Justifies as he knows that Jen is still out there and hunting for him.
  • When Mathayus (Dwayne Johnson), The Hero of The Scorpion King, crashes through the ceiling of Sorceress Cassandra's (Kelly Hu) bathing chambers, she surfaces from the water clad in nothing but Godiva Hair and instantly grabs a convenient dagger and assumes a defensive stance while Mathayus has his jaw hanging.
    Cassandra: Well? Are you going to kill me or just stare at me?
  • Showdown in Little Tokyo: During the shootout in the Japanese bathhouse, several Yakuza who were bathing are dressed only in Modesty Towels or Fundoshis but are all armed with Micro-Uzis.
  • Sweetwater: Two bandits spot Sarah bathing topless in a river and start approaching her with less than noble intentions. But this turns out to be a deliberate trap as she turns to face them and reveals she had a revolver with her all along and had just been waiting for them to get close so she could take them out.
  • Wild Zero: The trigger happy arms dealer lady showers with a gun, which comes in handy when a couple of zombies sneak up on her while she's showering.

    Literature 
  • In The Caves of Steel, the future-NYPD rules require this; Elijah keeps his blaster (in a waterproof holster) with him whilst showering. As restroom and shower facilities are communal (though socially still "private" as men are expected to ignore each other) and securable lockers seem nonexistent the rule logically follows.
  • In the Charlie Parker Series, a flashback to Louis and Angel's first meeting has Louis emerge from the shower and pull a gun on Angel, who has broken into his apartment and is attempting to steal his television. Louis also keeps a small arsenal hidden in the medicine cabinet in their guest bedroom' en suite.
  • In the first Doom novel, Flynn Taggart decides to risk taking a shower in the Phobos Lab infirmary. He takes the trouble to lock the doors and turn off the lights except for the one in the shower stall and keeps his trusty shotgun within arm's reach. Makes sense since the base is currently in the middle of an Alien Invasion and a Zombie Apocalypse. Luckily for Flynn, he doesn't get attacked while he's showering. He gets attacked immediately after leaving the infirmary though.
  • Dragonlance Chronicles: In Dragons of Winter Night when Silvara hears Gilthanas watching her bathe, she runs over to her clothes. He expects her to cover herself, but she just pulls out her knife. He manages to calm her down and they actually have a bonding moment, and the incident raises their Unresolved Sexual Tension to a point where they both confess and the scene ends in a Sexy Discretion Shot.
  • The Immortals: In The Realms of the Gods, Daine's bath is interrupted by a tauros. She improvises a sling with her Modesty Towel and swears to never bathe without a proper weapon again.
  • Not a literal example, but in Iron Fist, two of the Wraiths on a mission are surprised to find that another Wraith brought his sniper rifle, even though the mission wasn't one that should have called for any sort of sniping. He offhandedly tells them that he takes it everywhere — sleeps with it, bathes with it, goes to the fresher with it... He's probably just messing with them, of course; even in Wraith Squadron, someone carrying a meter-long laser rifle on his person at all times would have earned him some weird looks.
  • In Matadora, Dirisha Zuri is told that the bathrooms are not off-limits in Matador Villa's running spetsdöd-tag game, and to therefore use the following procedure when washing her hands: take off one spetsdöd, wash that hand, put the spetsdöd back on, then do the same with the other hand.note 
  • In The Stainless Steel Rat Wants You by Harry Harrison, James Bolivar DiGriz is showering at home on a peaceful planet. He hears his wife's scream and runs out without even grabbing a towel. He sees her get shoved into a car by two goons and pulls out a gun he keeps in his ankle holster. We can assume that the gun is waterproof. Needless to say, the neighbors are a little freaked out by a naked guy firing a gun.

    Live-Action TV 
  • Chuck: In "Chuck Vs The Suitcase", Chuck and Sarah sneak into the apartment of the Villainess Of The Week Sofia while she's showering and take the chance to search the room. But just as Sarah leaves Chuck alone, he finds himself held at gunpoint by her while she's still naked and dripping wet, and he finds it very difficult to Ignore the Fanservice.
    [Chuck is almost finished opening her safe]
    Sofia: [Dramatic Gun Cock] Don't move.
    Chuck: [slowly turns around to face her, sees she's completely naked and quickly turns away]
    Sofia: Look at me.
    Chuck: [turns to face her again, trying and failing not to ogle her] Okay, you should know that I have a girlfriend—
    Sofia: Who do you work for, and how did you find me?
    Chuck: [nervously] I would love to get into this. Is it at all possible for you to cover yourself with maybe a towel?
  • Dominion In the pilot episode, Arika is taking a bath when someone enters the room and she suddenly spin-sits, while quickly pointing a gun at the intruder who turns out to be David, who makes fun of her paranoia.
    David: You’re as paranoid as ever.
    Arika: If that were true... you'd be dead.
  • In the 2005 Hercules miniseries, Forest Nymph Deianeira is bathing in a lake and keeps her bow and arrows close to the shore, which she's quick to pick up when the boar she's been hunting unexpectedly shows up. Unfortunately for her, so does Hercules who's quick to start Eating the Eye Candy. Deianeira cowers in the water and threatens to shoot him but he counters that the vision of her standing up to shoot might be Worth It. Furious, she then calls for her Loyal Animal Companion to come to her and provide In-Universe Scenery Censor from him while she gets out of the water and goes Streaking to her home.
  • Hunter:
    • In the pilot episode, Hunter breaks in on McCall's apartment in search of her, and when he comes inside the bathroom he finds her soaking in her tub inside her bedroom with a gun pointed at him.
    Hunter:: A water pistol? [teasingly] Where do you keep it?
    McCall: ...Just hand me something to put on.
    [Hunter hands her a hand towel and she gives him a Death Glare and shoos him away]
    • Happens again in "The Biggest Man in Town". Hunter comes into his room and notices someone has been inside. Alert, he draws his gun and searches the room, and when he opens the bathroom he finds an equally alert McCall in his bathtub pointing her own gun at him. He even comments on how they've been on this same situation before and she asks for him to hand her a real Modesty Towel before she can explain herself.
  • Jack-of-All-Trades: Played With in "Monkey Business" where this is done with the episode's MacGuffin: a hidden idol Jack and Emilia are competing over. While trying to extract its location from Emilia, Jack barges in on her, while she's taking a bubble bath and invokes Defeat by Modesty by starting to drain the tub to get her to confess. As the water rapidly drains and exposes more of her, she tells him it's under her bed and he hurries off. But she has the last laugh when he finds naught but a bunch of mouse-traps under her bed, and it's revealed she was bathing with the idol the whole time, which was the real reason she was panicking as the water level lowered.
  • Legend of the Seeker: Averted in "Mirror" when two thieves hatch a plot to steal Richard's Sword of Truth. One of them gets disguised as Kahlan via a magical mirror and she coyly tries to convince Richard to go Skinny Dipping with her in a lake. Richard is reluctant to bathe without his sword, but she turns up the sex appeal and tells him to loosen up and she gets him hooked when her Dress Hits Floor and they're soon both frolicking in the water while her partner successfully steals the sword he left in the bank. When the real Kahlan finds out, she's less than pleased.
    Kahlan: Someone stole the Sword of Truth? How did that happen?
    Richard: I was distracted!
    Kahlan: By a naked woman you went swimming with!
    Richard: But I thought that was you!
    [awkward beat]
  • Longmire: When Vic is being stalked by Ed Gorski in "A Good Death is Hard to Find", she starts taking her gun into the shower with her.
  • Lost Girl In "Hail, Hale", Bo's relaxing bubble bath is interrupted by Tamsin walking on her. Bo is startled and stands up in the tub with a knife in hand. Tamsin enjoys the sight while asking if Bo always bathes with a weapon.
  • Lucifer: In "Manly Whatnots", Chloe is having a Shower of Angst while thinking about last episode's events, but it gets interrupted when she hears an intruder in her home. She throws on a Modesty Towel and picks up her gun which she brought to the bathroom and goes to investigate. It turns out to be Lucifer, who's casually barged into her house to cook her breakfast, but he ends up startling Chloe who manages not to fire on him but still loses the towel. Lucifer obviously doesn't miss the chance to go Eating the Eye Candy.
  • The Shannara Chronicles: Im "Chosen", Wil first meets Amberle when he finds her taking a Waterfall Shower and he ends up slipping and rolling down to where she is. By the time he gets himself up, a stark naked Amberle (only seen from the shoulders up) is holding a knife to his throat and demanding he keep his eyes up.
  • Pasión de gavilanes: When Rosario interrupts Dark Action Girl Dínora while she's bathing she ends up startling her and Rosario quickly finds herself being held at gunpoint.
  • Psych: Lassiter has many guns hidden in his apartment, including one hidden in his showerhead.
  • V.I.P.: One episode had Vallery popping up out of a bubble bath with a pistol hidden somewhere on her body.

    Tabletop Games 
  • The Forgotten Realms spell "Laeral's Gesture" is the result of Laeral being tired of being attacked while bathing, and thus not having her spell components on hand (it quickly fires any currently available low-level spell, skipping its material or verbal components).
  • One illustration in Scion: Demigod shows Horace Farrow lifting a pistol out of his bath and shooting an intruder. Appropriately enough, it's next to the description of the "Eternal Vigilance" Knack. It's also a reference to The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (see above).

    Video Games 
  • In a scene cut from the US release of Breath of Fire IV, Ryu sneaks in upon Nina and Ursula conversing while enjoying a hot spring (after Nina told him not to, no less) in an island the group is currently stranded on. The moment his curiosity gets the better of him and he tries to take a peek, he finds out that Ursula apparently prefers to soak with her firearm close by. See for yourself. In fact, given that there was literally zero reaction time between him starting to peek and the rock he was hiding behind getting shot, she probably heard him and knew he was there the whole time, just waiting for him to try his luck.
  • Crush Crush: Claudia takes her BFS with her everywhere including the showers, and even spoons with the blade in bed.
  • In a cutscene in God Hand, Olivia is talking to Gene while taking a bubble bath and pulls an ax from under the bubbles to discourage him from getting too close. (Of course, she's crazy, and Gene's not known for keeping his hands to himself.)
  • Hitman: Codename 47: In the Thermal Bath Hotel, the pool guy will direct you to the changing booth where you'll find some complimentary swimming trunks. If you wish, you can pick up your weapons after changing (and magically stuff them into your chest, mind you), but it's not necessary to shoot anyone.
  • Not a gun, but in The Granstream Saga, the hero sneaks onto a flying vessel in a treasure box. Said treasure box is delivered to the female leader's personal quarters. The hero sneaks out of the box at just the right time (said leader is taking a shower in the same room), said female leader notices and throws a battle axe across the room, barely missing his head and comes out of the shower dressed in a Modesty Towel and holding a massive morning star.
  • Kid Icarus: Uprising: Hot springs scattered around the chapters serve as healing points but are also used by many characters for recreational purposes. According to a conversation between Pit and Magnus in Chapter 2, "the angel's code of conduct states that [angels] must always be ready for duty"; this means going into a hot spring fully dressed and armed doesn't just happen in gameplay.
  • In Mass Effect 3, a background NPC character called Aeian T'Goni is a Shell-Shocked Veteran from an incident where she found herself helpless when the farm she was guardian was attacked while she showered without her gear. What followed was a horrible, horrible line of traumatic events. It wasn't funny at all and as a result, she requests permission to carry a firearm in the bathroom. If you use your Spectre status to let her have a gun, she uses it to kill herself.
  • No More Heroes:
    • Averted at a critical moment: Travis doesn't have his beam katana when Ermen Palmer attacks him on the toilet, almost costing him his life.
    • A nod to this is in the sequel, which upholds this trope — Travis keeps all his beam katanas on his belt at all times in the sequel, most likely due to the above incident.
  • The Operative: No One Lives Forever: Cate isn't attacked in the Shower Scene, but you can see she's ready for that contingency, as her handy revolver is right there.
  • Rage of Bahamut: The artwork for Bloody Mary has her lounging in a bathtub while having her rusted blade right by her side.
  • Shadow Warrior (1997): Follow the singing to find a woman taking a Waterfall Shower. But watch out, she only looks unarmed. If the Player Character stands too close his pickup lines will lead her to whip out an Uzi.
  • While not a gun, in Summon Night: Swordcraft Story 2, when The Protagonist is asked why they always carry their smith hammer around (Which they just used to defeat a monster.) They reply by pointing out, as a Craftknight, they carry their hammer around with them EVERYWHERE. (They mention taking it to the bathroom, so it's not too much to assume they also bathe with it)
  • The Witcher 3: During the "Get Junior" quest in Novigrad Geralt goes to talk to Dijkstra in a Public Bathhouse, since it's a meeting ground for the heads of the big four crime syndicates in Novigrad as it ensures no one will be armed with anything but for a Modesty Towel. But Dijkstra is still Properly Paranoid enough to keep a hidden stash of weapons nearby anyway, which comes in handy when they're all attacked by Whoreson Junior's Mooks hoping to take advantage of their lack of equipment.
  • Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of Dana: Adol first meeting with Laxia in Seiren is a fairly standard Accidental Pervert scenario where he walks on her bathing in a river. Granted, she's wearing a Modesty Towel, but it doesn't stay on for long since her reaction is to reach for her nearby rapier and attack him with it, but this proves to be a mistake when Adol parries her attack and it causes her to lose her grip on the towel, which pools at her feet. The player doesn't see anything beyond a Shoulders-Up Nudity shot of her covering herself while having a Naked Freak-Out. The scene ends with her Skyward Scream followed by a slap sound.

    Visual Novel 
  • Killing Time: Hatsuki's sprite still has her sword even when she's bathing.

    Web Animation 

    Webcomics 

    Western Animation 
  • Archer: Archer's competence and good judgment are extremely questionable, but he goes nowhere without a weapon, not even a hot tub. In "Jeu Monégasque He then promptly Lampshades the entire thing.
    Archer: ...My gun's all soapy. Pretty dumb, taking a bath with it...
  • Danny Phantom: In the Made-for-TV Movie Reality Trip, Jack is shown to be so paranoid of ghosts that he even showers with his anti-ghost weaponry.

    Real Life 
  • George MacDonald Fraser's way of describing the dangers of serving in the British Army in Palestine in 1946 was, "You took your service revolver into the shower with you." He was not exaggerating.
  • A variant: the legendary Miyamoto Musashi supposedly had poor personal hygiene because he refused to bathe very often, with the reasoning that even if you brought a weapon with you, you could be caught off guard too easily.

 
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