Attention. Attention. The following personnel are assigned to the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital:
Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce
Chief surgeon of the 4077th MASH, he was one of the few people assigned to the unit for the entire run of the show; he lived in what was officially the Bachelor Officer Quarters, but almost always called "The Swamp". Hails from the fictional Crabapple Cove, Maine (Vermont in some early episodes) where his widowed father still lives.
- The Ace: Generally considered the best all-around surgeon of the show. Occasionally Charles in later seasons would get the nod for his specialties, and even B.J. would show him up with a technique he didn't know. In one episode, he even conceded that B.J. be the one to perform a tricky surgery as he had the most experience with it (i.e.: reading about it in a medical journal).
- Achilles in His Tent: "The Late Captain Pierce"
- Actual Pacifist: Hates guns and violence in general. The amount of fights he participates in over eleven seasons can be counted on one hand. He even refused to fire back at North Korean soldiers when he and Col. Potter were pinned down in a ditch. Potter, naturally, calls him out on his bullheadedness in this specific situation, and convinces him to at least just fire into the air to scare them off.Hawkeye: Look, Colonel, I will treat their wounds, heal their wounds, bind their wounds, but I will not inflict their wounds!
- Always a Bigger Fish: B.J. becomes this to Hawkeye, as it becomes apparent that as much of The Trickster Hawkeye thinks he is, B.J. is an even bigger one, albeit in a Beware the Nice Ones way.
- Ambiguously Bi: Flirted with every woman who crossed his path, but did the same with quite a few men, as well. It was passed off as a joke in canon, but he's virtually the only male character to do so and he does it so frequently that it cannot possibly be a throwaway joke.
- Author Avatar:
- Increasingly as the series progressed and Alan Alda assumed an ever-larger creative role.
- Inverted in the transfer from novel to television; the original author had penned Hawkeye as a patriotic, pro-war, married man, based upon himself and upon seeing the changes, he disowned the movie and series altogether.
- Author Filibuster: He's frequently used as a vehicle for these, especially in the later seasons.
- Berserk Button: The war - especially the draft - as a whole, as well as harming children and commanding officers who sacrifice soldiers' lives to win.
- Beware the Nice and Silly Ones: Hawkeye is a nice guy under all the pranks, but harm children and it doesn't matter if you're in the same army; he'll get you.
- Big Brother Mentor: To Radar.
- Big Brother Instinct: ...and he does not take it well if anything happens to Radar ("Fallen Idol") or if someone (Frank) mistreats him.
- Broken Ace: Had multiple mental breakdowns over the course of the series, and it's generally implied he takes the sufferings of war to heart much more than the other characters.Hawkeye: I'm here to pull bodies out of a sausage grinder, if possible without going crazy. Period.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: As mentioned on the Main Page, it was pretty much impossible to fire surgeons when the army was in such desperate need of them. Hawkeye knew this. And took advantage of it.
- The Casanova: And at one point called out on it by a nurse he hadn't hit on. Because he hadn't hit on her.
- Character Development: He grows increasingly more depressed and neurotic as the show progresses and the war begins to take its toll. On the other hand, he also shows his kinder, more compassionate side more often and treats the women he pursues with more respect.
- Character Filibuster: He's occasionally prone to these, particularly when his righteous indignation is roused or when he's in the mood to indulge in a bit of Word Salad Philosophy.
- Character Tics: He has a frequent, and vaguely disgusting, habit of sniffing his food prior to eating it. B.J. even calls him out on it in one episode.
- Chivalrous Pervert: He may be a womanizer but respects the nursing staff professionally, grows to respect and care deeply for Margaret, actually turn down a romance with a girl barely out of her teens in the USO episode (a pet the dog moment), and seems to have been humbled by his encounters with Kelly and Inga. He also won't seduce a nurse he thinks is married (although nurses dating or engaged to someone are still fair game), though it turns out she just wears a ring to fend off attention she doesn't want.Hawkeye: You're not married? Move over, lieutenant.
- Claustrophobia: He suffers from it, as revealed in the "C*A*V*E" episode.
- Crying Wolf: Hawkeye's unrepentant reputation for causing trouble and trolling others means he's not always trusted. In "I Hate A Mystery", a series of robberies occur in the 4077, and are found in his tent. Precisely nobody in the camp believes him when he claims to be innocent. To display what his reputation's like, nobody thinks he's stealing out of greed, but believe he's playing some sort of elaborate practical joke.
- Deadpan Snarker: A great deal of the time.
- Determinator: He will always put caring for his patients over himself and not let anything slow him down be it illness, sleep deprivation, risk of capture, death, his own fears, or an Obstructive Bureaucrat.
- Doesn't Like Guns: Or grenades, mines, bombs, anti-aircraft artillery, ammo dumps, tanks, the Korean War, or war in general. Basically he has nothing but hate for anything made specifically to kill another man. He is not hesitant to take this up with top brass or anyone supporting said war.Hawkeye: (to Frank) I'll carry your books, I'll carry a torch, I'll carry a tune, I'll carry on, carry over, carry forward, Cary Grant, cash-and-carry, carry me back to Old Virginia, I'll even 'hari-kari' if you show me how, but I will not carry a gun.
- Drinking on Duty: Frequently.
- In "The Consultant", he calls someone else out on it, who then points out that Hawkeye keeps a still in his tent.
- In "Fallen Idol" he gets called out on it himself by Radar and by Potter. Potter expresses disbelief that a surgeon of Hawkeye's skill and professionalism would do such a thing.
- Dynamic Character: Hawkeye's personality gradually changed as the series went on, until he became almost a completely different person from who he was in the early episodes. He started out as a carefree, energetic, irreverent trickster; by the end, he was a troubled, insecure man prone to depression and brooding, having gone through several emotional breakdowns. While the Doylist explanation for this is simply that the tone of the series as a whole gradually shifted to be more sombre and serious, the progression is also fairly logical from a Watsonian perspective: from the very start it was made clear just how much Hawkeye hates the war, and how constant exposure to it drains him; it simply wore him away, season by season.
- On the other hand, he always, always puts the patients first, and no matter what he will not let someone die on his watch if he can avoid it. He never crosses over into Stepford Smiler territory, but he almost always has a good bedside manner no matter how miserable he is.
- Fatal Flaw: Pride, like most of the other surgeons. He needs to be good at his job, especially later in the series, if only to justify his being in Korea. A patient developing complications noticeably gets to him.
- Hawaiian-Shirted Tourist: Frequently, both when he goes on leave or is just vacationing between OR sessions.
- Heroic BSoD: At least five major breakdowns in eleven seasons, each one worse than the last, culminating in the final episode where he's hospitalized after losing it over a smothered infant. He's prone to smaller ones whenever he loses a patient.
- Heroic Comedic Sociopath: To some extent, in the early seasons. He was never outright evil by any stretch, but he could certainly play very mean tricks on anyone who got in his way, through the truly cruel ones were reserved for people who had earned it in some way.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners:
- Best friends and very close with his fellow army doctor Trapper.
- After Trapper gets to go home, he bonds with his replacement B.J.
- Hypocrite: Frequently drinks on duty and performs surgery while hungover, yet complains about another character doing the same thing.
- The Insomniac: Cannot sleep in "Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde".
- Ironic Nickname: Hawkeye Does Not Like Guns, but he's nicknamed after a famous fictional sharpshooter from The Last of the Mohicans.
- It's All About Me: If Hawkeye has a major flaw, it's this. He's extremely self-centered and only occasionally gets called out on it. He even hijacks giving a eulogy to tell everyone how he feels about them and how they make him feel.
- Kick the Morality Pet: When he gets drunk enough in "Fallen Idol" that Winchester has to finish for him and then goes ballistic on Radar, for which he gets called on it by pretty much everybody.
- Large Ham: Note this is referring to character moments. A good example appears in "Adam's Ribs", where Hawkeye leads, hammily, a revolt in the mess tent over the lack of variety in the chow line, culminating with him doing what can only be described as pole-dancing.
- Legally Dead: The Army mistakenly declares him this in "The Late Captain Pierce".
- Lovable Coward: He sometimes affects this persona, usually for comic effect. It's really a front, though; when the chips are down he's capable of great bravery and heroism, and his aversion to combat is more about fear of hurting or killing others (see Actual Pacifist above).
- Married to the Job: His first serious relationship ended because his girlfriend could tell that, really, he would always think of the patients first and her second, and she couldn't accept that. She reappears in one episode and, after they attempt to pick things up again, spells it out to him that this is why she left in the first place.
- Military Maverick: An extreme version. The only way to make Hawkeye do something military is to point a gun at him or tell him there's a storm on the way.
- Military Moonshiner: A rare officer example, and very much NOT a secret. Upon finding out, Colonel Potter made a suggestion or two on how to improve the product. Both Potter and Blake would occasionally come by to have some.
- Missing Mom: Although Hawkeye's mother is referenced in a couple very early episodes, his father is eventually established as a widower. Similarly, Hawkeye goes from having a sister in season 1 to being an only child.
- Motor Mouth: Occasionally, as when delivering a Character Filibuster. It also tends to crop up whenever he's stressed (or just plain bored), and is pretty clearly a coping mechanism. It's especially severe in "Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen", when Hawkeye is confined to a mental ward.
- My God, What Have I Done?: His reaction after Radar, who he'd urged to drive to Seoul and find a woman to bed, returns as one of a load of wounded.
- New Old Flame: Carlye, his old girlfriend from surgical residency in Boston, who gets assigned to the 4077th as a nurse in "The More I See You".
- Obfuscating Insanity: He tries to get Frank to approve him for R&R by employing this in "Bananas, Crackers and Nuts".
- Only Known by Their Nickname: His full name is Benjamin Franklin Pierce, but he is always referred to as Hawkeye, a nickname given to him by his father (whose favorite book was The Last of the Mohicans).
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: If he ever salutes you, you have earned it.
- Precision F-Strike: In "The Interview". While the offending word is naturally bleeped out, it can clearly be seen on Alda's lips as he speaks."I may care about things more than I ever have before, because there's so much more to care about here. On the other hand, I really don't give a shit what happens, 'cause it just doesn't matter anymore."
- Not to mention his calling Lt. Park a "son of a bitch" as he's taking his prisoner away for presumed Jack Bauer-style interrogation in "Guerilla My Dreams". This was actually the first (un-bleeped) use of the b-word on U.S. network television.
- Not exactly clear which curseword he was going to use, but in "Welcome to Korea" upon being confronted with a Korean man who was using his daughters to check for mines in a field, him asking Radar what the Korean translation of a particular word was blotted out by the explosion of a mine.
- Prematurely Grey-Haired: While Alan Alda aged 11 years during the show, from the character's perspective, he grew grey hair in just two years. Considering the setting, it's not surprising.
- Pungeon Master: Cracking puns and witticisms is basically what he does, to the point that one late-series episode is his getting into a bet with B.J. to refrain from doing so for 24 hours, something he finds almost physically painful.
- Really Gets Around: Less so in the later seaons, but he sleeps with a lot of women.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Red to B.J.'s Blue. Conversely, Trapper was usually pictured as more impulsive and emotion-driven than Hawkeye.
- Refuge in Audacity: Most of his pranks. He even mentions in the episode "The Interview" that he loves doing something crazy just to see the looks in people's eyes when their jaws drop in disbelief.
- Sad Clown: He explicitly states in canon that he uses humor to deal with the horrors of war.Hawkeye: Joking about it is the only way of opening my mouth without screaming.
- Sarcasm Failure: Is generally ironic and caustic about most things, but when he taps into his compassionate side (for a friend or a patient) he instantly becomes incredibly serious.
- Screw the Rules, I'm Doing What's Right!: One of the prime examples of this trope.
- Secular Hero: In one episode Father Mulcahy fondly refers to him as "that crazy agnostic".
- Sensei for Scoundrels: Is this for Radar in at least one episode, and for more than one guest star in others.
- Shell-Shocked Veteran: Shows a little of this from time to time. A lot of it in the episode where heavy fighting and many casualties results in double and triple shifts and severe sleep deprivation for the entire company.
- Signature Laugh: His hyena-like cackle is always easy to pick out.
- Sleeps with Everyone but You: He flirts with just about every nurse in the camp, but he completely ignores resident Fat Girl Nurse Kellye. In the last season premiere "Hey, Look Me Over", she calls him out on this and accuses him of avoiding her on purpose. Later, after secretly watching her, he sees her in a new light, but by then it's too late because she's moved on.
- Sleepwalking: He suffers from this (as well as Bad Dreams) in "Hawk's Nightmare".
- Stepford Snarker: A classic example, but often crossing into Snark Knight territory as well.
- Tall, Dark, and Snarky: Tall, handsome, dark-haired and incredibly snarky.
- Temporary Blindness: In "Out of Sight, Out of Mind".
- The Trickster: Especially in the early seasons, Hawkeye would often pull complicated tricks (which would often grow more and more complex as the episode went on) to get something out of the Army, his friends, his enemies, or anyone else he happened to come across. Usually he used these for the greater good, trying to make life bearable for those affected by the war, but of course sometimes he'd just do it for entertainment. Later in the series this aspect of Hawkeye somewhat faded: he'd still sometimes play pranks on other characters (and they would play ones on him, as well), but these were usually for fun; the role Hawkeye's schemes played in solving major plot elements was greatly reduced.
- Unperson: When Hawkeye is declared dead, an officer from HQ jokingly refers to him as one of these. Hawkeye is not amused, especially for the family of the soldier who really died.
- Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist: Not nearly to the same degree as in the novel and film, but while his heart is generally in the right place he's not exactly a stranger to egotism, self-righteousness, sexism, etc.
- Yank the Dog's Chain: Gets this in the endings of "Bananas, Crackers and Nuts" and "Adam's Ribs" when incoming wounded ruining his (and Trapper)'s R&R plans and his finally getting his hands on the titular ribs, respectively.
- Yiddish as a Second Language: He's been known to employ a Yiddish phrase now and again, though is at a loss for the term for "bedbug" note when doing a crossword puzzle.
- You Are in Command Now: Comedic example in "Carry On, Hawkeye"; less so in "Commander Pierce".
- You Called Me "X"; It Must Be Serious: Charles called him "Hawkeye" once in the series, to break him out of a Heroic BSoD.
Capt. "Trapper" John Francis Xavier McIntyre
Another surgeon, and the first of Hawkeye's sidekicks in the Swamp. Originally supposed to be equal to Hawkeye, he ended up as more of a sidekick, much to the dismay of the actor. This, combined with issues with Rogers' contract, resulted in Trapper being Put on a Bus (back stateside) after the third season. He was not made an unperson, though—jealousy of him worked into two later B.J. stories. The nickname, as related in the original novel and film, is from an incident in his past, when a woman he was having sex with claimed he had "trapped" her.
- The Casanova: Didn't let his status as a married man stop him from chasing nurses as avidly as Hawkeye.
- Character Development: He actually did get some, despite his relatively short time on the series. He starts out simple as The Lancer to Hawkeye before showing some shades of his War Is Hell philosophy when he almost kills a North Korean POW as well as getting drunk and punching out Hawkeye when he attempted to get back home to see his family. Some of these developments would later be mirrored by B.J.
- Cool Shades: He briefly wears these while hungover in a couple of episodes.
- Deadpan Snarker: He's arguably even more of one than Hawkeye, with much of his day-to-day dialogue being delivered in this manner.
- Even the Guys Want Him: It was jokingly implied in an early episode that Hawkeye had seen guys taking peeks at him during calisthenics. Trapper didn't take it too well.Trapper: Which guys are taking peeks at me during calisthenics?Hawkeye: I'd rather not say, some of them were married.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Hawkeye, albeit sometimes verging on overt Ho Yay.
- The Lancer: Was both this and a Foil to Hawkeye.
- Put on a Bus: He receives his discharge and returns to the States immediately prior to the start of Season 4.
- Put on a Bus to Hell: At least from Hawkeye's point of view. His not leaving a note (only a goodbye peck on the cheek) clearly upset Hawkeye and has been picked up on by many a fanfic.
- Of course, in real life, it was a "Take That!" against actor Wayne Rogers, who had acrimoniously left the show because he was fed up with the fact that Trapper was being treated as a sidekick instead of an equal. In addition, he was also greatly frustrated with a "morals clause" in his contract, which stated he could be suspended or fired if he did anything the producers found objectionable. When Rogers left, in fact, the producers actually sued him for breach of contract, but their case fell apart when it was discovered that Rogers didn't even sign the contract in the first place, due to the clause issue.
- Tranquil Fury: Gets a moment of this in "Radar's Report", when he appears to consider murdering a wounded North Korean POW (who'd inadvertently caused the death of one of Trapper's patients while trying to escape from the O.R.) by pulling his IV. Only Hawkeye walking in on him and reminding him that "that's not what we're about" prevents him from following through on it.
- Yank the Dog's Chain: "Check-Up" has him believing he's going to be sent home due to a stomach ulcer, and even getting a big going-away party from the camp...only to learn that this isn't the case.
- In "Kim" he comes to love (and makes plans to adopt) the titular Korean boy, who's presumed to be an orphan. Then the kid's mother turns up.
- Your Cheating Heart: And not sorry about it, although he also seems to genuinely miss his wife and daughters back home.
Lt. Col. Henry Braymore Blake
The Mildly Military commanding officer of the 4077th for the show's first three seasons. Almost always seen with a fishing hat (with lures that made any salute attempt risk a Purple Heart), he was from Bloomington, Illinois. He tried his best to keep the camp running, although between Hawkeye, Trapper, Burns, Houlihan, and Radar... well, OK, Radar's goal was to keep the camp running, too.
- The Alleged Boss: Generally a Type 1, with some Type 4 mixed in. Sometimes has to be reminded that he's actually Pierce and McIntyre's commanding officer.
- Averted in the O.R. scenes, where he is very much in charge. A notable instance comes in "Sometimes You Hear the Bullet", when he orders Hawkeye to quit operating on his friend (who's already slipped away) and go help Trapper.
- Also averted regarding Klinger's attempts to be considered mentally unstable - no matter what Klinger tried, Henry would always refuse to discharge him.
- Averted in the O.R. scenes, where he is very much in charge. A notable instance comes in "Sometimes You Hear the Bullet", when he orders Hawkeye to quit operating on his friend (who's already slipped away) and go help Trapper.
- Amusing Injuries: In several episodes. Among them is him saluting and accidentally skewering himself on his hat's collection of assorted fishhooks, which actually looks rather painful. The most notable situation is when he kept getting injured while somebody tried to kill him and all sorts of calamities followed him in his wake in near-misses with death (you won't find that funny after the finale of Season 3), culminating in the outhouse exploding. Out walks Henry with the toilet seat adorned around his neck.Henry: ........BOOM.
- Ash Face: His decision to thump the Swamp's fireplace chimmney in search of contraband got him pelted and blanketed with soot, causing Hawkeye to collapse into a fit of uncontrollable, hysterical laughter.
- Cliché Storm: In-universe; Henry was prone to these.Henry: All right, people, I'm gonna give it to you straight. Starting right here and now, we're all going to have to put our shoulders to the wheel, our noses to the grindstone. We've got to hunker down and pull together, all for one and one for all.
- Colonel Badass: Without a doubt, he is NOT one of these, and acknowledges as much himself. Hawkeye once mused privately that he could be arrested for impersonating an officer.Hawkeye: It's a bit like being on a sinking liner, running to the bridge, and finding out the captain is Daffy Duck.
- Deadpan Snarker: He has a very dry and somewhat sarcastic sense of humor that reveals itself during the times when he's not being an incompetent boob.
- Drinking on Duty: He's been known to imbibe when alone in his office.
- Father to His Men: Or more specifically to Radar, who actually regresses slightly after Henry is gone. He also had this with Hawkeye when Hawkeye's best friend from Crabapple Cove died in the O.R. and Hawkeye couldn't save him.Hawkeye: *weeping* I haven't cried once since I came to this crummy place. Why am I crying for him? Why not any of these other kids?Henry: If I had the answer to that, I'd be at the Mayo Clinic. Does this look like the Mayo Clinic to you? All I know is what they taught me in command school. There are certain rules about a war. Rule number one is young men die. And rule number two is doctors can't change rule number one.
- First-Name Basis: He's routinely addressed in this manner by Hawkeye and Trapper, though for the most part he doesn't seem to mind.
- Genius Ditz: Is a competent doctor, but a chronically indecisive commanding officer.
- Happily Married: In spite of his infidelities (see Your Cheating Heart, below), he seems to love and miss his wife.
- Home Guard: Army Reservist
- Mildly Military: Is usually out of uniform, tends to be lax about discipline, and tolerates an awful lot of guff from his two captains.
- Modern Major General: He's an excellent doctor, but what he knows about being a military officer would probably fit in the palm of his hand. With room to spare.
- Nice Hat: Until he saluted.
- Pointy-Haired Boss: A rare benevolent example. He means well, but he is completely out of his depth in trying to run a MASH unit, and everybody knows it.
- Put on a Bus: At the end of Season 3, he gets his discharge orders and heads off to fly home to the States.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: For a certain value of reasonable. Occasionally he would simply ignore Hawkeye and Trapper's requests because Majors Burns and Houlihan were giving him so much trouble. Other times he'd go to bat for them, even when unexpected. It caught Hawkeye off guard once.Hawkeye: [upon hearing Blake stood up to Burns and Houlihan] How dare you do the right thing?
- Retirony: Accumulates enough points to be discharged, but dies on the trip home when his plane is shot down.
- Ruptured Appendix: He suffers one of these in "The Long John Flap".
- The Talk: His periodic sex lectures kind of resemble this, although he does such a bad job that his STD lecture ends with Radar asking him to "give us a talk on VD".
- Team Dad: He's a pretty inept administrative figure, but the whole camp loves him for his paternalistic "one of the guys" nature, especially since they know they could have ended up with someone who'd be more militaristic and far worse to bear.
- Like Frank Burns, for example. (Who actually does become their commanding officer for an unspecified period of time between Henry's death and Potter's arrival.)
- That Came Out Wrong: Is apparently incapable of opening his mouth to an authority figure without either revealing too much information or dropping an Accidental Innuendo.
- Would Hit a Girl: Threatens to punch Houlihan right in the mouth in "Local Indigenous Personnel" when she, serving as a mouthpiece for Frank, insults his style of command. This shocks Houlihan and Burns enough to get them to back off.
- Your Cheating Heart:
- In the first season he has a regular girlfriend in Lt. Scorch, and there are hints of a couple other extramarital dalliances.
- The "Henry in Love" episode from season 2 has him falling hard for a much younger woman he met on R&R in Tokyo, to the point where it actually jeopardizes his marriage...at least, until Radar puts things right.
- Then in "Life with Father" he experiences the other side of this when he discovers his wife had a fling with an orthodontist in his absence. Although he seems more upset about the fact it was an orthodontist than anything else...
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan (at one point also Penobscott)
A no-nonsense, by-the-book soldier, and head nurse. Another of the few people who saw the whole show through at the 4077th. The first seasons had her in an illicit relationship with Frank Burns; after meeting Donald Penobscott, she breaks off with him. Later she breaks off with Donald, too, and spends the rest of the show single.
- All Women Are Prudes: Invoked, but Averted. Margaret is publically a prim, professional figure, but she's very passionate in private and, in the early series, it wouldn't be inaccurate to call her a slut with standards.
- Alliterative Name: Her early nickname ("Hot Lips" Houlihan) sort of achieves this effect.
- Battleaxe Nurse: Averted considering that even in her most hardassed period to coworkers in the early years; she is unquestionably professional and caring to the patients.
- Birthday Episode: "The Birthday Girls" has her planning a weekend birthday trip away from camp, only to get stranded in the countryside with Klinger after the jeep he's driving her to Seoul in breaks down.
- Blonde Republican Sex Kitten: At least in the beginning.
- Brainless Beauty: Subverted. In earlier seasons she tended to get rather silly while alone with Frank, but she was always responsible, took her job very seriously, and was presented as intelligent and competent, even when she was treated on the show as a bit of a babe. Both the audience and her former antagonists grew to respect her over the course of the show.
- Casual Kink: Hinted at in some of her interactions with Frank, and she is generally the dominant figure. A whip is mentioned in one or two episodes, and is even a present from her fiancee Penobscott early in their relationship.
- Catchphrase: In the early seasons, she was frequently heard emitting a plaintive wail of "Oh, Frank!"
- Character Development: Moved from being a one-joke, unlikable character to a nuanced, much more sympathetic one.
- Covert Pervert: During the early seasons, part of the comedy of Margaret's character is her attempts to hide her extremely sexual nature and antics, only to fool absolutely nobody.
- Cruel to Be Kind: She was particularly exacting and harsh to a nurse who was studying to be a doctor, because there were so few female doctors in the Army and damn it, Margaret wasn't going to let her fail.
- Defrosting Ice Queen: Goes from a real hardass to a much warmer and more human figure over the series.
- Embarrassing Nickname: "Hot Lips", although she seemed to accept it in later seasons.
- Fear of Thunder: In the "C*A*V*E" episode she helps Hawkeye deal with his claustrophobia by sharing (and confronting) her own lifelong fear of loud noises.
- Friend to All Children: Even during her more meaner years, Margaret always had a soft spot for children regardless of nationalities.
- Getting Crap Past the Radar:
Margaret: Frank, my lips are hot! Kiss my hot lips!
- Remember, the hot lips aren't the ones on her face.
- Hawk, pass us a martini. Heavy on the heavy oils.
- Jokes about her ass (a part of her that seemed most noticeable by the males in the cast) seemed incredibly common in the series.
- Gung Holier Than Thou: Margaret is very proud of the US Army and her diligence in trying to follow all the rules and regulations, and looks down on the draftees for their less than stellar devotion to what they consider a bunch of silly nonsense. This trait is eased back as part of her "softening up" progress during the series.
- Happily Married: Sadly averted with her marriage to Donald Penobscott. It fell apart due to his mistreatment of her and the distance between their postings, but she kept trying to make it work until she found out he was cheating on her.
- Hospital Hottie: A lot of the male characters think she's sexy.
- Hypocrite: Not as bad as Frank, but still can be quite hypocritical. Even after her character development.
- At one point, she got angry at Donald Penobscott for cheating on her, seemingly forgetting that she unrepentingly helped Frank cheat on his wife before he came to the picture. In addition, she would remark on how degenerate and perverted Hawkeye and Trapper are for womanizing with the nurses when she gleefully sleeps with any male high ranking officer who visits.
- She often claims that her nurses have no respect for her when she's unfairly harsh to them on multiple occasions (especially when one of their supposed infractions is correcting Frank at the operating table).
- Irony: She's quite casual about the fact she's sleeping with a married man for the first four seasons of the show, and often gets angry or upset when she's forced to acknowledge that Frank's never going to divorce his wife for her. She finally dumps Frank to marry Donald, only to learn that he's cheating on her, a fact which contributes to her eventually divorcing him.
- Lady Macbeth: She sort of acts like this in the early seasons, pushing Frank and/or teaming with him to go over Henry's head, and on a couple of occasions scheming with him to try and get Henry removed from his command, presumably replaced by Frank.
- Military Brat: Her father is a legendary career Army soldier named "Howitzer" Al Houlihan. She spent her childhood moving around."When I was a little girl ... I thought a civilian was just someone who was waiting to get his uniform back from the cleaners!"
- Moral Myopia: The situation detailed in Irony above; when she finds out about her husband's cheating, the term "Hell hath no fury" might be the best way to describe her reaction. This after she had constantly gotten angry at Frank for mentioning his wife during their own affair.
- The Neidermeyer: Albeit to a lesser degree than Frank, but still. Before growing into a more fair authority figure in the later seasons, she was a bossy, brown-nosing shrew of a woman who often abused her power (especially around her nurses) while complaining about how those under her don't respect her. She also wasn't above sleeping around with high ranking officials to get what she wanted.
- No Accounting for Taste: Her relationships with Frank and Donald. The former is a snivelling weasel of a man who she knows for a fact is cheating on his wife to be with her. The latter is a lying, miserly, manipulative jerk who is secretly cheating on her all the time. Scully is somewhat better, but she still dumps him because he doesn't respect her enough.
- Not So Above It All: She occasionally got in on the jokes the rest of the cast played, and at one point started a pun-off with Hawkeye with "the sulfa's in the living room, between the end tables."Hawkeye: [stunned] Margaret. You made a joke!Margaret: I told you I was tired!
- Pet the Dog: Had several of these has she started becoming nicer, especially in instances where she learned to be kinder to her nurses. As early as the second season, we saw her maternal instincts coaxed out by the Korean orphan Kim and her budding friendships with Hawkeye and Klinger in "Aid Station."
- Had a literal one in one episode where she secretly adopted one of the local strays, feeding it scraps of food from the mess hall when no one was looking. Reveals a much more human side to her when she breaks down in tears at the news that the dog was run over by a truck and killed. This leads to another when she befriends a nurse she had berated earlier for being too emotional with the patients. (Ironically, the nurse in question didn't even bat an eye about the dog, while Margaret barely made it to her tent before she collapsed in tears).
- Pom-Pom Girl: Takes on the role of cheerleader for her Battalion during the film's Big Game, even though she knows next to nothing about football.
- Really Gets Around: In the early seasons, part of the comedy is the fact that Margaret is blatantly implied to have slept with, or be sleeping with, virtually every Major or higher ranked military official who catches her eye. To say nothing of the ongoing adulterous affair with Frank Burns. This aspect gets toned down as she becomes more human.
- Sergeant Rock: What she later becomes after her Character Development.
- She's Got Legs: As seen on the rare occasions when she wears a skirt, or shorts, or a short nightgown, or runs out of the shower wearing only a short towel (and, curiously, pantyhose).
- Slap-Slap-Kiss: Does this with Frank in "Dear Dad...Three".
- Her liaison with Hawkeye in "Comrades in Arms" could be seen as a more figurative version.
- Sleeping Their Way to the Top: More than once other staff members make remarks suggesting that Margaret has slept around to help her career. And while it's never shown (or confirmed by "Hot Lips"), it is made clear she has had sexual relations with high ranking officers. However, even in her Hot Lips days it was suggested she only slept with high ranking officers because that's just the kind of men she likes, and that she hasn't used it to her advantage. One might remember who her father is. That said, her relationship with particular generals certainly made it easier to make things difficult for Henry.
- The Smurfette Principle: There's quite a few nurses, but she's the sole female character in the core cast.
- Sugar-and-Ice Personality: Specifically noted by Hawkeye in one episode, where he describes Margaret to his father like this: "The major is a paradox. A woman of considerable passion, she is also a stickler for military correctness. I wouldn't mind making a grab for her myself, but I don't know how to do that and salute her at the same time."
- Stepford Smiler: Much tougher and gritter than the usual example, but definitely one. Even in an early episode we see her smiling over her younger sister getting married, though it's clear that Margaret is bothered that she, herself, is not even engaged.
- Sweater Girl: Especially in the early seasons.
- Team Mom: To her nurses, in a way. She's very hard on them but she's also quite protective of them.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: To Hawkeye and B.J., with some underlying Belligerent Sexual Tension with the former. She never stops snarking at them, but eventually warms up enough to play practical jokes on them and even tickle-attacks Hawkeye in one episode.
- Speaking of sexual tension, there's a fair amount of this between her and Trapper in the early seasons. In "Hot Lips and Empty Arms", (while she's drunk as a skunk,) she wraps her arms around Trapper and tells him her true feelings while they're both in the shower.
- The same thing happens in "Check-Up", when everyone thinks Trapper is going home and he's given a farewell party, she makes it very clear that she's always found him attractive.
- Wartime Wedding: To Donald Penobscott, at the end of Season 5. It doesn't last.
- Well Done, Daughter Girl: Shares a moment like this with her father at the end of the episode "Father's Day." Col. Potter gives her this a couple times, as well.
- What Does She See in Him?: Margaret's passionate affection for Frank elicits a lot of puzzlement, In-Universe and out. It's implied it's because he is both as passionately supportive of the military and its regulations as she is (in theory, at least) and a relatively high-ranking military officer (rank being a definite turn-on for her). Later series episodes add the implication she also found Frank's tormented side and passionate displays of affection endearing, if not enough to make up for his many, many personality faults. Or his persistent status as a married man.
Maj. (offscreen, Lt. Col.) Franklin "Frank" Marion "Ferret Face" Burns
The camp's second-in-command, and a real Jerkass. The closest anyone came to enjoying his company in the series was Maj. Houlihan, with whom he had an illicit relationship—he has a wife and family back in his home of Fort Wayne, Indiana.
- Abusive Parents: As he tells Trapper in one episode, "I'm from a very strict family. We weren't allowed to talk at meals. We couldn't even hum. Anybody who hummed got a punch in the throat."
- During a phone call with his mother, he comments that his father only pretended to like him, a comment seemingly undisputed by his mother.
- Annoying Laugh: A childish, high-pitched giggle, ad-libbed by Linville.
- Birthday Episode: Both "For Want of a Boot" and "The Most Unforgettable Characters" have Frank's birthday as a subplot. Oddly enough, the former episode is set in the dead of winter while the latter takes place in June.
- For a character like Frank, a birthday in the dead of winter, where most people are freezing cold and miserable, seems quite fitting.
- Butt-Monkey: Squarely in the sights of anyone on the show with a rank of Captain.
- Can't Hold His Liquor: Played with. He's normally a Teetotaler, and when he does drink he tends to get very drunk indeed. On the other hand, he seems to be able to imbibe without feeling it or reacting to the taste. Possibly he can hold his liquor, and just happens to drink enough to get good and plastered on the rare occasions that he lets his hair down.
- Combat Medic: What he thinks he is.
- The Neidermeyer: What he actually is. In about every field he was involved in, whether military or medical.
- The season one episode "Major Fred C. Dobbs" has Henry Blake refer to him as "a fair, competent general surgeon", implying that Frank was not really a bad doctor but merely an inferior one when compared to Hawkeye and Trapper (and later B.J. and Winchester), but as time went by the writers just went more and more with the all-around bad doctor jokes. Granted, those were ubiquitous from the beginning, and was in fact a defining trait in the book. Henry's anger at Hawkeye and Trapper in that particular episode may have led him to give Frank more credit than he deserved. It could also be possible that he is a skilled surgeon, but his own ego causes him to make mistakes that make him seem worse than he is.
- Control Freak: One of his defining traits is his being a stickler for discipline and order, especially military. It made his (fortunately brief) tenure as a base commander absolutely unbearable.
- Dark and Troubled Past: His stories about his childhood are genuinely disturbing. Even his actor Larry Linville said there was something very dark and dangerous about Frank.
- Delusions of Eloquence: He's sometimes prone to this.Frank: Leadership is a lonely business. Your Napoleons, your Kaisers, your Atillas the Hun...
- Dirty Coward: When he believes he's been captured by North Koreans pretending to be supply soldiers, he immediately tries to surrender and offer them all of the information he knows. Lucky for him, even the enemy couldn't stand him and told him to get out of the jeep and walk back to camp.
- Dr. Jerk: He's a doctor, and he's a complete and total asshole. What more need be said?
- Dry Crusader: In "Alcoholics Unanimous".
- Embarrassing Middle Name: Marion
- Embarrassing Nickname: "Ferret Face". Which, as he drunkenly confesses in one episode, was given to him by his own brother.note
- "Needle Nose" is also employed in a couple of episodes.
- The Koreans in the area also have a nickname for him, though only heard in one episode:Kim Chung Quoc: The Major had what we call, here in Korea, a real "fertilizer face".
- Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: He seems to really love his mother. Part of the reason he became a doctor was to please her, and when he's upset over Margaret's engagement, a phone conversation with his mother was just the thing he needed.
- Fatal Flaw: Greed. It's implied that he truly does love Margaret, but he's simply too greedy to give up his money by divorcing his wife (who has all the stocks and properties in her name).
- Fetish: Frank has a thing for feet.
- First-Name Basis: Pretty much every other officer in camp routinely addresses him this way (save for Col. Potter, who's Regular Army enough to call him "Major" or "Burns" despite having no more respect for him than any of the others).
- Flanderization: Particularly in the fifth season, which led to Linville leaving the show when his contract expired, as there was no further development possible for Burns. (And the fact that even Linville was starting to hate Frank.) While other characters got better, Frank got worse.
- Freudian Excuse: Frank apparently had an absolutely miserable childhood.
- The Friend No One Likes: Frank is this to the entire 4077th beyond Margaret. Best seen in "Movie Tonight" when everybody in the main cast sings an ad-libbed lyric to "I Don't Want No More of Army Life" and gets an amused/colorful reaction from the rest of the camp. After remaining oddly silent, suddenly, Frank chimes in long after the singing has stopped and everyone's attention is turned away, hastily belting out a lyric that is more of a thinly-veiled threat to Hawkeye and B.J. out of nowhere after feeling too bashful to speak up, and the whole room goes as dead as a mortuary, while Frank shrinks back into his seat feeling totally small and put out and making it obvious that he knew this was doomed to happen.
- Gung Holier Than Thou: Frank is constantly flaunting what a patriotic American he is and his love for the military. At the same time, he's also a total coward who lives in fear of actually getting hurt in the war, and he cheats on his taxes.
- Hate Sink: Serves as one of these In-Universe. At one point, Hawkeye attacks a particularly obnoxious Frank whilst claiming that nobody will save him due to Frank being "the ten most hated men in this camp". Something of a Running Gag is that even Margaret, the one person in the camp who actually likes him, will often lose patience and call him out on being a despicable human being. Case in point, after he gets Section 8'ed out of the camp, whilst packing Frank's things, Margaret goes from talking about Frank's sweet, tender side to angrily calling him a fink for stealing her alarm clock.
- Henpecked Husband: Implied from conversation and from the home movie of his wedding.
- Holier Than Thou: Though not so much as his movie counterpart, and in fact most of his ardor is channeled into patriotism rather than religion.
- Hypochondria: Seen any time he's sick or injured. Especially in the episode where the unit had to take precautions due to a hepatitis scare.
- Gave himself a Purple Heart because he was caught a shell fragment in his eye. No, not a mortar shell fragment, an egg shell fragment. From opening a hardboiled egg too hard.
- Insane Troll Logic: He once put a nurse on report for handing him the instrument he had asked for.
- It's All About Me: He never cares that effectiveness and morale plummet whenever he's in command (and it's never his fault anyway according to him), he feels he's where he deserves to be and nothing else matters. This is especially evident when he gets the news that the camp is getting a new commanding officer, which causes him to throw a tantrum and then run away from camp.
- Jerkass: Frank Burns is the camp's resident asshole. So much so that he was more of an enemy to the MASH populace than the war was, during the early seasons. The war was down the road, whilst Frank was right next door.
- Jerk Ass Woobie: As much of a jerk as he is, you really are inclined to feel a bit sorry for him on occasion, such as during the telephone call scene in "Margaret's Engagement." Most of the time, his suffering at the hands of his tentmates is classic Comedic Sociopathy material. His wedding video increases the Woobiedom, with almost no guests, a bride who doesn't smile, and getting a fly strip stuck to his face while cutting the cake.
- Lawful Stupid: When commanding, he discovered that the "M" in "M.A.S.H." stood for "mobile". So he naturally decided to move the entire camp 100 feet down the road... and then, the next day, moved it back. For context, the camp is supposed to move with the front lines, not whenever the commanding officer feels like it.Frank: The "M" stands for mobile!Hawkeye: Also for meshuggah'.
- Leader Wannabe: He often would covet being the CO, and would thus relish the times when (as 2nd in command) he would be temporarily put into command (his underlings, not so much).
- Manchild: Frank often displays appallingly childish behavior for a man his age and in his position. Perhaps the most telling is in Colonel Potter's introductory episode; not only does Frank, upon retreating to Margaret's tent after hearing he's being replaced as Commanding Officer of the 4077, start shouting and flailing his limbs around in a temper tantrum befitting a toddler, he then complains about how the camp will miss him when he's gone and starts holding his breath like a toddler. Soon after, he actually runs away from home like a little kid, something that an incredulous Hawkeye calls Margaret out on.
- Some of Frank's more disturbing moments arguably bump him up to Psychopathic Man Child, with his willingness to do stuff like steal a colonel's six-shooter to impress Margaret and then allow Radar to take the blame and potentially be given 15 years in the stockade for it.
- Manly Tears: On hearing the news of Henry's death in "Abyssinia, Henry". A rare human moment for the character.
- Mean Character, Nice Actor: Larry Linville was, in Real Life, very different from his character.Larry Hama: Larry Linville was a sweet and charming guy, and one of the most popular people on the set. Quite the opposite of what he played.
- Miles Gloriosus: Frank likes to make out that he's a tough soldier who's ready to fight the Red Menace bare-handed, but tends to fold like a tent anytime there's a hint of real danger.
- Mistaken for Gay: The episode "The Chosen People" has a scene where Frank is on the phone with another Major from the Civilian Affairs office. After bitching about the slipshod way things are being run at the 4077th, Frank tells the other officer, "You're my kinda fella... Hey, maybe we can get together sometime? I have a feeling that we're very much alike." While we only see/hear Frank's side of the conversation, it's clear from his subsequent, horrified reaction that the guy propositioned him.
- And, of course, Hawkeye and Trapper deliberately induce this as part of their scheme to gaslight a visiting colonel in "The Ringbanger".
- Momma's Boy: Frank's mother is probably the only one who truly loves him.
- Significantly, he keeps a photograph of her next to his cot but none of his wife or kids. (He does mention he's got a picture of his wife in his wallet at one point, but considering that he's on the phone with his wife and trying to stop her from leaving him at the time, it's questionable whether that's actually true.)
- My God, What Have I Done?: In the "O.R." episode, after discovering he was trying to remove a kidney from a patient who only had one.note Frank's surgical incompetence is usually Played for Laughs, but in this particular case he seems to be genuinely horrified at what he nearly did... and uncharacteristically grateful to Trapper for pointing it out to him in time.
- The Neidermeyer: He's rude, loud, obnoxious, entitled, racist, sexist, homophobic, a stickler for draconian discipline, has no respect for anyone but himself unless he's kissing their ass, and is an incompetent doctor besides. Literally no one in the camp except for Houlihan liked him during his time there, and even she has her limits with him.
- Never My Fault: He gives Klinger a hard time for being out of uniform by wearing a red bandana while Klinger is delivering some necessary supplies a nurse asked for. Frank physically holds Klinger back, causes him to drop the supplies, and remarks, "See what you did?!"
- He'll often verbally tear into his current nurse for a mistake he made or for something he omitted during surgery. At one point his words even cause Nurse Ginger to cry.
- Number Two: And no, that's not a Double Entendre. Okay, not an intentional one.
- Only in It for the Money : Why he became a doctor, and why he never divorced his wife despite his affair with Houlihan. It's mentioned pretty frequently that his house and most of his investments are in her name.
- Patriotic Fervor: And how.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: Along with his other negative qualities, Frank is strongly prejudiced against Koreans (even South Korean allies), calling them "savages" and "heathens", and has little use for foreigners in general. He's also a homophobe.
- Put on a Bus: His offscreen crackup and departure at the start of Season 6. After losing it and attacking a general and his wife (mistaking them for Margaret and Donald) while on R&R in Tokyo, he's put under psychiatric observation. Then he's cleared of all charges, promoted to Lieutenant Colonel, and assigned to a VA hospital back in the States. Hawkeye and B.J. understandably do not take the news of this well.
- Rank Up: promoted to lieutenant colonel after his breakdown over Margaret's marriage to Penobscot. Further, in the original book he'd only been a captain.
- Red Scare: Bought into this thoroughly.
- Sanity Slippage: Not that he's the sanest character to begin with, but he really doesn't react well to Margaret dumping him and getting engaged to (and eventually marrying) Donald Penobscott.
- Small Name, Big Ego: Frank's ego far outstrips his actual capabilities.
- Straw Loser: Used to help emphasize his villain status in comparison to Hawkeye et al.
- Suspiciously Specific Denial: Frequently, especially with regard to his relationship with Margaret.
- That Came Out Wrong: Occasionally, in his conversations with Margaret.Frank: Oh, Margaret, you're my snug harbor. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you to sail into.
- Throw the Dog a Bone: After having spent the entire fifth season being humiliated and abandoned, he gets promoted and given a plum posting at a stateside VA hospital.
- Triage Tyrant: Sent in American soldiers ahead of Korean ones even though the Koreans are in much more critical state. However, this IS Truth in Television, as this was the actual standard triage procedure at genuine MASH units. It's the WAY he went about it, however, that put the "tyrant" in Triage Tyrant.
- It should be noted that while this is still standard operating procedure for US Military Medicine, Burns way of doing it was purely out of his distaste for anyone that wasn't an American. The triage priority however only applies when dealing with limited staff, and lots of critical patients. If an American or Allied soldier can wait, then a critical enemy soldier will go ahead of them. This is done for two reasons. 1. It shows how willing we are to treat people, regardless of faction, and 2. It allows Intelligence groups to glean information from them later. Dead men tell no tales after all.
- Your Cheating Heart: Cheats on his wife with Margaret Houlihan but never planned to actually divorce her. Also carried on an affair with his receptionist before coming to Korea, which it is implied he intends to renew upon his arrival (he is still in contact with her and making references to the hotel they would meet at in letters).
- In yet another Hypocritical Humor example, he's also paranoid that his wife is cheating on him back home, to the point of hiring a detective to follow her... and then worrying that she's fooling around with him, prompting him to hire a second detective to shadow the first one. (An unmade episode reveals that she actually has been having an affair with a Congressman, although the canonicity of this is questionable.)
Cpl. Walter Eugene "Radar" OReilly
The company clerk, and the epitome of Hyper-Competent Sidekicknote ; Steve Jackson has actually used him and his ability to know things 'before the Colonel' as full-blown Psychic Powers in two of the company's roleplaying games. In fact, his nickname derives from announcing incoming helicopters before anyone else can. Early on, he's shown as pretty savvy and worldly, and occasionally even a little bit devious; later, the Ottumwa, Iowa native develops more into the lovably naïve Woobie we all know. Note that we didn't say he stopped being savvy and worldly... whether he simply opted to behave better for the new CO is up to the viewer.
- Absentee Actor: Gary Burghoff renegotiated his contract to limit his appearances beginning in the fourth season, so there are actually quite a few episodes that have Radar "away on R&R".
- And Starring: Burghoff was billed this way in the season 8 episodes up to and including "Good-Bye, Radar".
- The Anticipator: More strongly in the early seasons, but Radar is defined by his ability to anticipate and preemptively prepare just about everything, including the Running Gag of always hearing choppers before anyone else does.
- Bearer of Bad News:
- Most famously at the end of "Abyssinia, Henry"."I have a message... Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blake's plane was shot down over the Sea of Japan. It spun in. There were no survivors."
- It also falls to him to inform Trapper he's not going home in "Check-Up", and to tell Hawkeye that Trapper did go home (while Hawk was away on R&R) in "Welcome to Korea".
- In "Change of Command" he has to tell Frank Burns that Potter's replacing him as CO, an assignment that fills him with such terror that Hawkeye and B.J. accompany him as backup. (To everyone's surprise, Frank accepts the news with calm professionalism...at least until he's alone with Margaret in her tent.)
- In "Dear Sigmund" he composes a letter to the parents of an ambulance driver killed in a crash, which Potter then signs. It's implied that this is something he often does.
- It usually falls on him to wake up a sleeping surgeon, typically because all Hell has broken loose (incoming wounded, patient getting worse, etc).
- Most famously at the end of "Abyssinia, Henry".
- Berserk Button: Don't let him see you mistreat an animal.
- Don't talk badly about his teddy bear. Or Iowa. Or his mother.
- It's also not such a good idea to shoot the bugle out of his hands during morning assembly.
- Making fun of his short stature is also a massive source of annoyance for him.
- Big Eater: He is seen quite a few times carrying or devouring a huge tray full of food, and is the only person in camp who never complained about the quality of the food. Hawkeye at one point suggests ending the war by having Radar eat North Korea.Klinger: How can you eat this slop?
Radar: My mouth is tone-deaf.
- Bitter Sweet Ending: Of all the characters whose post-Korean War fates we know about decisively, Radar had the absolute worst luck. When he departs the series in season 8, things seem to be looking up for him; he's finally going home to his mother, and he even meets a cute girl — Missouri native Patty Haven — who is actually shipping back out to his neck of the woods. Then, in season 9, we learn that the farm is really struggling financially, to the extent that Radar has had to take a second job. In the After Show AfterM*A*S*H, we learn that the bad harvest seasons only got worse, and Radar ultimately had to sell the entire farm, especially because he couldn't keep up with the competing government subsidies in his area, forcing them both to leave and his mother move in with his Aunt Lucille. In the failed After Show "W*A*L*T*E*R", we learn that it got even worse from there; he married Patty Haven... but she dumped him and ran off with another man on the honeymoon. Not surprisingly, he was Driven to Suicide! What keeps this from being a full-fledged Downer Ending is that, when he went to the drug store to buy a fatal overdose worth of sleeping pills, he struck up a friendship with the girl working there, Victoria, who snapped him out of it. And then his cousin Wendell Micklejohn got him a new job on the police force in St. Louis, Missouri. So his luck had finally turned itself around.
- Broken Pedestal: "Fallen Idol" is all about Radar's disillusionment after learning Hawkeye, who Radar saw as a "Super Surgeon" who could do anything under any kind of pressure, was drunk on duty and had to leave the O.R. mid-operation to throw up, leaving Charles to finish for him. Radar was never told it was because Hawkeye was under tremendous guilt for getting Radar wounded in the first place.
- Can't Hold His Liquor: Seeing that he doesn't drink often, he doesn't really have much of a tolerance. He once ended up getting hammered on barely two drinks.
- "Here they come!" or "Choppers!" when sensing the arrival of incoming wounded preemptively.
- And then "Wait for it!" if another character says they don't hear anything.
- Prone to saying "Gosh" or "Gee", childish and innocent words that reflect his youthful innocence.
- There's also the fact that Radar often parrots what someone is going to say right as they're going to say it, which in itself happens so much it might as well be a catchphrase.
- "Here they come!" or "Choppers!" when sensing the arrival of incoming wounded preemptively.
- Characterization Marches On: As noted above, he's a lot more sly, devious and worldly in the early seasons, including stealing Colonel Blake's brandy and cigars, but he becomes more childlike and innocent after Colonel Potter joins the cast, losing his taste for smoking and drinking anything other than soft drinks.
- Companion Cube: His teddy bear.
- Country Mouse: From a small town in Iowa. When interviewed, he initially doesn't see the point in saying hi to his mom because there was only one television set in his town.
- Cute, but Cacophonic: Played with. Henry and Potter occasionally have trouble getting the staff to quiet down, only for Radar to instantly shut them all up by bellowing "QUIET!" Other times, he merely has to say it at a normal volume and everyone immediately quiets down.
- Deadpan Snarker: Not nearly as often as the doctors, but even more so on the "deadpan" end of the scale. And he was more likely to get away with it because it wasn't expected of him.Frank: Here's tomorrow's routine. See that it's posted.
Radar: (reading the routine) They're not gonna like this.
Frank: I didn't come here to be liked.
Radar: You certainly came to the right place.
- Dreadful Musician: His bugling leaves a lot to be desired. And when he plays the bridal chorus on the piano during Margaret's wedding, he flubs a couple notes and winds up noodling a bit before Mulcahy gets him to stop. However, he can play a mean set of drums...as can Gary Burghoff.
- Fainting: On a bus with a wounded Korean woman who goes into labor, Radar practically has a Heroic BSoD.
- Flanderization: Grew increasingly more childlike and naive as the show went along. Until Pierce got mad at him for his foolishness, which is where Radar began to snap back and mature in indignant response, before finally outgrowing all this in his departure episode.
- Friend to All Living Things:
- His menagerie of pets. He even objected to killing a rabbit of his as part of a pregnancy test.
- In one episode he tells Col. Blake he's got sixteen cats back home. ("At the draft board they found a furball in my throat.")
- In another episode, he saves a lamb from becoming an Easter feast by tricking Henry into giving it a medical discharge.
- Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Rarely swore; his epithets of choice were mostly limited to "Heck!" and "Aw, jeez!"
- To the point that when he actually says "Hell," Hawkeye and B.J. realize he's seriously distressed.
- Hates Baths: Rarely showered, much to the merriment of Hawkeye and the other officers.
- Height Angst: Radar is periodically embarrassed by or ashamed of his shortness, combined with others teasing him this makes him very angry.
- Hiding the Handicap: Meta-example: Gary Burghoff has a congenital deformity of three fingers on his left hand, and would always hide his hand the best he could whenever possible on camera, usually by holding a clipboard or some other item related to Radar being a clerk.
- Hyper-Competent Sidekick: Former Trope Namer. Generally the main interaction between the unit and I-Corps. One episode is built entirely around Hawkeye and Trapper John trying to get an incubator, going all the way up to (and disrupting the press conference of) a brigadier general. In the denoument, Radar reveals he just traded for one.
- Especially in the early seasons where Colonel Blake was "in charge," Radar pretty much ran the unit and pointed to the lines where Blake needed to sign. (One episode had Blake "jokingly" admitting that Radar actually ran things at a camp assembly. Absolutely nobody laughed.)
- Later in the series, Col. Potter plainly and proudly said "Radar really runs the base" to his worried doctors when his departure to an indoc required Burns to be in charge.
- In-Series Nickname: Called Radar because of his ability to predict incoming helicopters.
- I Need a Freaking Drink: In the form of a Grape Nehi, of course.
- Malaproper: Occasionally, along with elements of Buffy Speak and Department of Redundancy Department. However, at other times he can be quite eloquent; witness, for example, his impassioned condemnation of the cost of war on people in the episode "The Interview".
- Maybe Magic, Maybe Mundane: Radar is called as such because he seems to be psychic, knowing when choppers are coming before they do and completing his superiors sentences when asked to do an order. The show makes it vague at whether Radar is psychic or just has extremely good hearing and knows rules, regulations and what his superiors will tell him by heart. Once, Potter managed to foul it up by giving him an order he didn't expect; Sherman was, to say the very least, pleased.
Hawkeye: [writing home to his father] It's very quiet at the moment, Dad. The only man in sight is Radar O'Reilly, an amazing kid. I've never put much stock in E.S.P. but if it is possible for one person to read another person's mind Radar has that ability, the little fink.Radar: [walking by that very moment]] Is that a nice thing to say?
- At one point, he appears to be a telepath....
- In another episode, Potter is composing a letter to his wife (which we hear via voiceover). At one point he tells her that his company clerk is "nice enough, but a little squirrelly". Radar, who's busy tidying up the desk right next to Potter, pauses in his work and glances at him.
- In the original novel, he actually is. His girlfriend in the book is too.
- Meaningful Name: Called Radar because of his ability to predict... well, just about everything, but approaching choppers in particular.
- Misplaced Wildlife: He has a skunk. In Korea. Skunks are mostly New World creatures; the few that aren't (stink badgers) are from Indonesia and the Philippines.
- Nerd Glasses: Present and accounted for, Sirs!
- Not Himself: In his final episode, the "Good-Bye Radar" two-parter in Season 8, he acts noticeably older — and angrier — than what we're accustomed to. According to co-scripter Ken Levine, this shift in characterization was Gary Burghoff's idea, as was having him appear in most of the episode without a hat, revealing Burghoff's rapidly-receding hairline. (Burghoff had also lost a considerable amount of weight since the previous season, giving Radar much less of a youthful baby-faced look.) The idea was apparently to show that the character had finally left his childhood behind and was ready to leave the bosom of his 4077th "family".
- Another possible in-universe reason for the change: his Uncle Ed had just died, and the news hit him very, very hard. It's understandable that Radar would change so dramatically upon learning that one of the people he was closest to and grew up with would not be there when he went back home, a reverse of Henry's unfortunate fate.
- The Other Darrin: Alone among the main TV cast, he's an aversion of this, as Gary Burghoff had played him in the movie as well.
- Precision F-Strike: From the last person you'd expect. But in the episode where Potter's horse takes sick while he's away, the doctors have trouble taking the animal's ailment seriously until Radar lets loose with the dreaded H-bomb (followed by "H-E-double-toothpicks!") It later happens again with no humorous sentiment attached when he's on the receiving end of one from one high-strung Pierce, who accidentally sent him into the line of fire, feels bad about the fact Radar got wounded on his watch, and then tells him "To hell with all your Iowa naivete, and while we're at it, to hell with YOU!" and stop idolizing him. Radar fires back spectacularly by echoing his statement; "To hell with me?! To hell with YOU!!" Followed by a truly epic comeback where Radar defends his small town upbringing and blasts Pierce for all the rotten things he's spouted.
- Put on a Bus: He receives a hardship discharge so he can go home and help run his family's farm after the death of his Uncle Ed in Season 8. He meets Hunnicutt's wife and daughter (offscreen) on his way back home, and later sends the 4077th a letter in Season 10. He also makes an appearance on AfterMASH and even gets a follow-up special all his very own titled W*A*L*T*E*R*.note
- Rank Up: Gets promoted to Second Lieutenant in one episode, thanks to an administrator owing a poker debt to Hawkeye and B.J. It gets undone at the end of the episode, though.
- Reality Ensues: When the 4077th receives a letter from him in Season 10, he makes them think all is going well back at home. It is not. Nobody was prepared for Uncle Ed's sudden death, who was helping the family barely scrape by at the time he died, and the farm is on the verge of collapse. This prompts the 4077th to band together and send Radar a Korean kid who's a brilliant farmer to help pull him and his family out of the hole.
- The Scrounger: Part of his effectiveness as a clerk comes from his being good at this. He's better at the paperwork side, however.
- Security Blanket: He had a teddy bear (likely to symbolize his childlike innocence) which he was always a little embarrassed about. However, in the episode where he left the cast (where his going-away party was cancelled due to an emergency rush of wounded shipped in and he had to leave without saying goodbye to anyone) he leaves it behind so they can remember him; Hawkeye and the others find it in the last scene. In the final episode, they place it in the time capsule, representing all the soldiers who came there as boys and left as men.
- The Short Guy with Glasses: With the "short" part, in particular, being the source of a great many jokes from Hawkeye and others.
- Shout-Out: Some people will note that the name "Radar" is a familiar holdover from their childhoods. That's because on Sesame Street, Big Bird named his teddy bear "Radar", the show's obvious send-up to Radar and his own teddy.
- Spider-Sense: Always knows when the choppers are in-coming before any annoucement over the PA is made.
Hawkeye: [to Trapper, as Radar picks up and answers the phone] Did you hear a ring?
- In "The Army-Navy Game," he manages to hear incoming artillery shells with a radio blaring right next to him.
- He also tends to pick up the phone just before it rings, and in the early seasons had a habit of anticipating Col. Blake's orders before they were even given.
- The Tonsillitis Episode: He comes down with this in "None Like It Hot".
- This had been a minor Running Gag through the series up until that point, with Hawkeye randomly commenting that Radar's tonsils would have to come out eventually.
Cpl. (later Sgt.) Maxwell Q. Klinger
A corpsman forever trying to get out of the Army on a psychiatric discharge, most notably by dressing in women's clothing; he cited a family history of this. Of his family, most are not English-speaking, and most are in his hometown of Toledo, Ohio. And yes, both the Toledo Mud Hens and Tony Packo's are real. (The Mud Hens at one point slaughtered the big-league Detroit Tigers in a pre-season game. It was a rebuilding year.)
- Always Someone Better: After Radar goes home, Klinger takes over his job as company clerk. Things don't go so smoothly at first, with Klinger taking a lot of flak for not being able to perform to Radar's high standards. However, Potter later admits that it was wrong to expect Klinger to simply be Radar and not give him a chance to grow into the job.
- Klinger eventually becomes a clerk on par with, if not even better than, Radar. He eventually earns a promotion to sergeant.
- Becoming the Mask: At one point, he worries about his orientation, given that at one point he's looking at sexy catalog shots... and contemplating how the outfits would look on him. Out of character, fears of this being implied by Farr's dressing in drag on TV every week and the fact that his children were becoming old enough to watch their father on TV in same led to Farr lobbying to get the crossdressing diminished (leading to more focus on zany schemes to prove Klinger's "insantiy") and nearly eliminated as the series wore on.
- Breakout Character: Klinger had been intended as a one-time throwaway gag character (meant to reference Lenny Bruce and (apocryphal rumours of) his attempts to get out of World War II dressed as a WAC). Kinger proved so popular with the audience and the cast that they just kept writing him into episodes.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: For all Klinger's discharge schemes, he never does them at the expense of his duties. That in turn explains why his antics are usually tolerated by the commanding officers even while they are never fooled.
- Camp Straight: He was originally written this way for his initial appearance (in "Chief Surgeon Who?"), but this was changed at Jamie Farr's behest. Klinger wants the Army to think he's crazy, not gay.
- Character Development: From Flat Character, add Hidden Depths. In fact, used to name the antitrope to Flanderization. Klinger started off as the guy bucking for a Section 8, then became the Lebanese jokester from Toledo who comes from a hard luck background. And when Radar departed and he became company clerk in Radar's stead, he also had a nightmare about what it would mean if he actually did run out on his friends at the Mash unit and completely stopped donning drag, deciding to ride out the war like the rest of them.
- *Click* Hello: Pulled this on a Chinese POW who tried to assault him using a scalpel.Klinger: Are you crazy? You wrecked a thirty-nine dollar dress! Your people will pay for this! *Pulls back the lever on his rifle and points the barrel not five inches from the POW's face.*
- Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: Klinger had a bunch of awesome moments, usually coming through when nobody expected he would. This is the guy who walked guard duty in heels and a fur stole...and then one time, used said stole to take down someone who had managed to get his rifle away from him without really hurting the guy. Klinger is the corpsman who hauled litters in heels, set the MASH pole-sitting record in army boots and a nightie, sewed his own wardrobe from scratch, drove halfway across Korea and brought back crates of live crabs and a footlocker full of beach sand for the sake of unit morale, scrounged up everything the unit needed when it needed it most, and concocted endless plans to get himself discharged from the army. Granted, the plans never actually worked, but points for creativity.
- Crying Wolf: Because of all the escape and discharge-catching attempts, there are several times in the series when others think Klinger is faking an actual source of trouble. Most notably his emotional distress when his wife sends him a "Dear John" letter and his getting sick from a dose of the antimalarial Primaquine.
- Determinator: When it comes to trying to get out of the Army, he is an absolute marvel of perseverance.Henry: (*pulls out binder of Klinger's forged letters*) Father dying, last year. Mother dying, last year. Mother and father dying. Mother, father, and older sister dying. Mother dying and older sister pregnant. Older sister dying and mother pregnant. Younger sister pregnant and older sister dying. Here's an oldie but a goodie: half of the family dying, other half pregnant. (*puts file down*) Klinger, aren't you ashamed of yourself?Klinger: Yes, sir. (*beat*) I don't deserve to be in the Army.
Charles: That man is the Michelangelo of deviant behavior.
- In "Souvenirs," he tries to get a Section 8 by sitting on top of a pole in the middle of winter. Potter doesn't buy it, but persuades him to stay up there in order to break the M*A*S*H pole-sitting record. Klinger succeeds after 94 hours and change, and Potter rewards him with a three-day pass to Tokyo.
- Averted in "None Like It Hot" when Potter tells Klinger that if he can wear a rubberized bodysuit and a heavy fur coat for 24 hours straight in the heat of a Korean summer, he really is crazy and deserves a Section 8. Klinger ends up folding with just one hour to go.
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: Several times.
- After he learns his wife has left him for someone else and wants a divorce, he goes looking for sympathy, but everyone thinks it's another con to get a Section 8. Ripping off part of his dress demonstrates he's not joking around this time.
- Had this reaction after getting hassled over not living up to Radar's high standards immediately.
- One episode shows him trying to decorate his living area with personal mementos, but Potter chastizes him for it. His quarters are the headquarters for the camp, so Potter demands a more professional look and no mementos at all. Klinger responds that everyone else gets to decorate their living areas with reminders of home and expressions of their identity, so he deserves the same freedom. In the end, they compromise and Klinger is allowed to set up some small items.
- Klinger once became seriously ill, but everybody believed that Klinger was faking illness to get out of work. When a Jewish soldier develops symptoms identical to Klinger's, that soldier is believed without question, something that Klinger calls the medical staff on. Its eventually discovered that Klinger had developed hemolysis from taking the antimalarial Primaquine, and his life was in serious danger.note
- Early Installment Weirdness: In his second appearance, Klinger was portrayed as having a Hair-Trigger Temper, to the point where he plans to threaten Frank Burns with a live grenade as revenge for Frank chiding him in postop (and refusing to allow him to wear a lucky red bandana his mother had given him). The incident was never mentioned again, and Klinger was generally portrayed as good-natured and easygoing from that point on. Well, he does have a Berserk Button when it comes to Sgt. Zale, specifically if Zale insults either his manhood or Toledo. In the fifth season episode "Hepatitis", when Hawkeye comes to check Klinger (who's in the kitchen) to see if he's showing any signs of the disease, Klinger brings up Zale insulting Toledo and starts getting worked up and throwing things around. He apologizes, but then gets worked up again with the same results. It gets to the point where Hawkeye has to pin Klinger against the wall just to keep him from doing it again.
- Extreme Omnivore: Invoked in one of his more famous one-off attempts to get a Section 8, where Klinger methodically starts disassembling an Army jeep and ingesting the parts (washing them down with motor oil). Deconstructed in that not only does it fail to work, Klinger has to be operated on to remove the bolts, oil and windscreen wiper rubber that he ended up eating after they cause him severe stomach pain.
- Failure Is the Only Option: Almost always, with his efforts to get out of Korea. Only two have a chance to work, and he nixes them. In one, he fakes a form to go home, to desert; after What Have I Done, he rushes to get the form rescinded—just as the brass are ready to approve it. In the other, the war ended. He stayed for his new wife.Klinger: I Can't Believe I'm Saying This...I'm staying in Korea!
- In the Season 2 episode "Radar's Report," Sidney Freedman offers to put his discharge through - if Klinger signs a form stating that he is a transvestite and a homosexual. Klinger balks, especially when Sidney emphasizes that Klinger would have to keep wearing dresses for the rest of his life.
- Fashionista: The man takes his cross-dressing seriously, and makes sure to get only stylish, flattering outfits that work together and complement each other. Women often comment approvingly on his sense of style.
- Gag Nose: And proud of it. He's been known to make light of it himself too, in one episode saying, "I come from a long line of short-nosed people. One day, my grandfather's camel spit in the eye of the village witch. Ever since then, we've been growing 'em like this!"
- Guile Hero: One of the reasons he's a good scrounger is that he knows how to talk to and influence the right people to get what the 4077 needs. He demonstrates it in "Cementing Relationships".
- Happily Married: Averted with his first marriage to Laverne Esposito; (presumably) played straight with his second marriage to Soon-Lee.
- He's Got Legs
- Hidden Depths: Klinger has no real love for the Army, but he always does what is expected him at the camp. He desperately wants out of Korea, but he's not going to endanger a patient because of it. And the whole reason he wants out is because, as he explains to Father Mulcahy in one early episode, "I was brought up to respect life, and that's impossible with all this killing."
- Demonstrated with his tireless efforts as an orderly. No matter what scam he was pulling, he never once shirked his responsibilities. Even the time that he tried to convince everyone that he was crazy by acting as though he were home in Toledo, he still assisted in triage (under the guise of helping victims of a traffic accident, but still).
- As mentioned above, he called out the officers for believing that he was faking an illness to get out of work. He was obviously very offended that they would think he would shirk his responsibilities.
- He furiously shouted at and was on the verge of man handling Colonel Potter when the latter accused him of lying about another serviceman being mentally ill. The soldier in question was in fact disturbed, enough so to present a real danger to the camp.
- As evidenced by the fact that he is introduced as a corporal and never gets busted down shows that his superiors consider him to have genuine leadership skills and to be a good NCO, despite his endless attempts to prove them wrong. He later earns a promotion to Sergeant and begins to show a talent for scrounging and finagling that would make Radar proud.
- Love at First Sight: Averted oh so hard with Soon-Lee. When they first meet, he is in charge of watching her after she is arrested. Their relationship builds over several episodes.
- MayDecember Romance: It's unclear exactly what ages he and Soon-Lee are in-universe, but in real life Jamie Farr has a good 23 years on Rosalind Chao.
- Nice Hat: He has a truly impressive and varied collection of millinery to go along with his dresses and other outfits. And, in later seasons, a Toledo Mud Hens cap.
- Obfuscating Insanity: His entire M.O., as he seeks a Section 8 to get out of the Army. In one case, he really milks this trope by pretending his surroundings are Toledo, that he's a mere salesman and that he has no memory of the unit. It almost works, but Potter tricks him in the end.
- One episode has him confiding to Sidney Freedman a nagging fear that he might be suffering genuine Sanity Slippage.
- This man ate a jeep trying to get a Section 8.
- According to Klinger, it runs in the family, as feigning insanity has gotten his other male relatives out of military service. He states in one episode that several of his dresses came from an uncle who used the same ploy to get out of World War 2.
- Only Sane Man: At one point B.J. suggests that Klinger may actually be this, precisely because he's the only one actively trying to remove himself from the war.
- Promotion to Opening Titles: In season 4.
- Rank Up: He gets promoted to Sergeant in season 10.
- Real Men Wear Pink: Even after he gives up wearing dresses, he still wears a pink bathrobe.
- The Scrounger: He takes over the mantle from Radar along with the clerk's job. Radar may have been better at the paperwork angle but Klinger is the better scrounger.
- Surrounded by Idiots: For all his own quirks, he often rolls his eyes at the others' antics. "Dear Uncle Abdul" even caps off with this. When Hawkeye and B.J. interrupt his letter to ask which of them is the funniest in the camp, an annoyed Klinger gladly bursts their bubble. He says they just tell jokes all day and rattles off a list of far funnier things lately: Potter getting him to wear his clothes and sit on Sophie the horse for a supposed self-portrait, seeing Mulcahy writing a song, Winchester's bird hunting triggering a landmine, and Margaret shooting her foot locker in order to get I Corps to finally replace it.Klinger: [continuing his letter] See, Unc? It's no wonder I never got a Section 8. There's nothing special about me. Everybody here is crazy.
- Unlimited Wardrobe: He had a vast number of dresses and costumes.
- Wacky Guy: Frequently.
- Wartime Wedding: To his childhood sweetheart Laverne Esposito, whom he marries (via radio) in season 3. After she finds another love back in Toledo, she and Klinger divorce in season 6... clearing the way for him to meet and marry Soon-Lee at the end of the final season.
- Wholesome Crossdresser: Well, as wholesome as an average U.S. Army corporal can be. Abandoned (along with most of the other Section 8 dodges) once he becomes company clerk.
- You Know I'm Black, Right?: When Charles goes off on "swarthy" Italians, Max becomes outraged, telling him that his family is all "swarthy" (being Mediterranean).
1st Lt. (later Capt.) Francis John Patrick Mulcahy
A Catholic priest, Mulcahy is the 4077th's quietly devout company chaplain — and one of the few characters who managed to get a promotion during the course of the show.
- Badass Preacher: Whether it is performing an tracheotomy under enemy fire, asking a frustrated and desperate Klinger to give him a grenade, or disarming a desperate AWOL soldier covering him at point blank range, Father Mulcahy knows no fear when called upon.
- Badass Pacifist: In the entire course of the Korean War, he had a total of two violent moments - once where he kicked a stove after giving a What the Hell, Hero? to Hawkeye (and admitted that it was completely out of character for him), and once when punching a patient who had struck him while they were trying to give him medical aid (which he spent the entire episode angsting about). The man coached boxing and never once aimed to hurt anyone.
- Beware the Nice Ones: He is one of the show's nicest characters (right alongside Radar), but when he gets angry, he is a force to be reckoned with. He scared the daylights out of a pair of patients (one Turkish, one Greek) who refused to stop fighting in Post-Op by telling them, "Love thy neighbor or I'll punch your lights out!" Best summarized by Sidney Freedman:Sidney: He's shy, and studious, and yet he has a right hook that could stop a truck.
- Cannot Tell a Joke: While he certainly had a sense of humor and wit, if he tried to tell a joke it invariably fell flat, even if he was reading the joke directly from a book.
- Can't Hold His Liquor: In "Alcoholics Unanimous", he's ordered by acting commander Frank Burns to deliver a temperance sermon to the entire camp. Suffering an attack of pulpit fright on seeing a larger audience than he's ever spoken to before, he takes "a bracer" to steady his nerves... and you can probably guess the rest.
- Deadpan Snarker: On occasion, usually when dispensing a little therapy.Father Mulcahy: [Trapper, drunk, is sitting at the piano at the O Club] Is something bothering you, Trapper?
Trapper: I'm not Catholic, Father.
Father Mulcahy: Well, all in good time... Which is more that I can say about your piano playing.
Klinger: Stray bomb appears out of nowhere. Blows up a shipment of chipped beef. What do you call that?
- Sometimes he just managed to get one in before the doctors.
Father Mulcahy: A gift from heaven.
- Determinator: The guy never stops. Helping out around the 4077th, hearing confessions, playing therapist to the wounded and the staff alike, working in his garden, helping out at the local orphanage, and he only ever admits to being tired two or three times in the entire series. Also apparently a theme in his sermons. When he's busy, he typically seems happier, because he's of more use. When virtually the entire 4077th was down with salmonella, he was thrilled.Colonel Potter: Indomitable. The man is indomitable.
- Dreadful Musician: He is pretty good on the piano most of the time, but others...I've been playing this song for twenty minutes, I can't find the ending!
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: Suffers from it more than anyone on the show, to his own chagrin. He's repeatedly passed over for promotion from 1st Lieutenant to Captain, and it irritates him every time it happens. But as a dedicated Good Shepherd, he considers his ambition for rank and status as something of a betrayal of his duty to be a model Christian. Epitomized in the episode "Captains Outrageous" where he goes directly to Col. Potter and angrily demands the promotion.The meek shall inherit the Earth, but the grumpy get promoted!
- Good Old Fisticuffs: The man is an amazing boxer. It starts as an Informed Attribute, but later becomes demonstrated in his reluctance to hurt people. This also becomes a plot point in "Dear Sis"; see below.
- Good Shepherd: Mulcahy is not a parody priest; he is devoted to his charges and the care of their souls. He extends this even to the Koreans in the vicinity, raising money to help orphanages in the area and ministering to both Korean civilians and Army personnel alike. He is also non-legalistic and ecumenical in his theological outlook (which is slightly ironic for a devout Catholic, and very unusual for the time periods in which the show was both set and shot in), to the point of being fascinated by—and even supportive of—local customs and spiritual beliefs. It seems that to him, what you have faith in isn't nearly so important as that you have faith.Wondrous is man and mysterious the ways of God. And I would have no one shield my eyes from the glory of His works.
- Taken to possibly the fullest extreme in the Season 8 episode "Life Time". B.J. is watching a wounded soldier who is on the verge of death, as that soldier's aorta could save another wounded soldier in the OR (the one around which the episode is centred). After Mulcahy asks if the first soldier has passed on yet, B.J. says they're moving the soldier to Pre-Op so the doctors can take the aorta immediately. Mulcahy starts up a jeep to go check the chopper for more blood (which is needed in the OR), then asks the Lord for the most unusual favor:Dear God, I've never asked You for this before, and I don't know what You're going to think of me for asking now...but if You're going to take him anyway, please, take him quickly so we can save the other boy.
- Taken to possibly the fullest extreme in the Season 8 episode "Life Time". B.J. is watching a wounded soldier who is on the verge of death, as that soldier's aorta could save another wounded soldier in the OR (the one around which the episode is centred). After Mulcahy asks if the first soldier has passed on yet, B.J. says they're moving the soldier to Pre-Op so the doctors can take the aorta immediately. Mulcahy starts up a jeep to go check the chopper for more blood (which is needed in the OR), then asks the Lord for the most unusual favor:
- Gosh Dang It to Heck!: He is a man of the cloth, after all. So you know he's really miffed when, for instance, he tells the camp (in the "Blood Brothers" episode), "You're all a bunch of...stinkers!"
- While conducting a bingo game, he runs out of Biblical names starting with G, and says "Gosh" rather than use His name.
- The Heart: The man is the camp priest, after all. So, naturally, he does his best to be the most empathic and moral of them all.
- Hidden Depths: His attempt at writing a war song is initially treated as a goofy distraction, but he ends up coming up with a very dignified one.
- Hot for Preacher: Is subject to this in one episode. Very much to his dismay.
- Irish Priest: Well, seems to have a slight lilt in his voice sometimes. And is fond of roller derby.
- Jack-of-All-Trades: Mulcahy in general shows an open-mindedness regarding other religions and denominations; as chaplain for any soldier who wants spiritual counseling, he does his best to meet their diverse needs.
- The Load: Subverted. In "Dear Sis", he feels like this because he thinks he doesn't make a difference. This was right after he got violent with a patient. After confiding in Hawkeye, Hawkeye raises a toast to him and calls him "too modest, too utterly simple a man to know how much strength he gives us just by the decency of his life among us".
- The McCoy: Surprisingly, he tends to be the one bringing up the emotional or "morally right" approach to various crises.
- My God, What Have I Done?: In the episode "Dear Sis", an unruly patient in Post-Op slugs Mulcahy; the good Father reacts by hitting the patient right back. Even though the patient did justify the use of force by punching first, Mulcahy feels wracked with guilt afterward, especially after the patient angrily suggests that Mulcahy went to seminary school at a boxing gym. (Turns out, Mulcahy actually taught boxing at the CYO.)
- In "Blood Brothers", Mulcahy starts acting like a jerk when he finds out a visiting Cardinal will be there for his weekly sermon and wants everything to be perfect. When he finds out one of the patients in Post-Op has been diagnosed with leukemia (after offering to be a blood donor for a wounded comrade), he breaks down during his sermon and says he feels ashamed that he behaved so selfishly over trivial matters.
- Nice Hat: The white Panama hat he frequently wears.
- Noodle Incident: He's been to two bachelor parties in his life. One was Donald Penobscott's, and the other was apparently wild and involved a nun jumping out of an angel food cake.
- Only Sane Man: An early episode had Hawkeye suggest that Father Mulcahy was the sanest person in the camp.
- Promotion to Opening Titles: In season 5.
- Rank Up: Gets promoted to Captain in season 8, after numerous complaints about being passed over.
- Running Gag: If there is some sort of betting pool among the personnel, Mulcahy will usually win (and donate the money to the orphanage).
- Seen It All: Says as much by the end of the series:I'll miss hearing confession, but after listening to you people for so long, I think I've just about heard it all.
- This also works as a stealth Tear Jerker since, by this time, the audience knows what the other characters don't: Mulcahy has lost his hearing.
- Soldiers at the Rear: As an Army Chaplain, he is not allowed to fight, and most people understand that. One episode, "Mulcahy's War", is all about him making an unauthorized trip to the front precisely so he can better relate to what the hospital's patients are going through.
- The Other Darrin: initially played by George Morgan in the pilot.
- There Are No Therapists: This is averted, thanks to him. Both he and Sidney Freedman (an actual therapist) admit that he is more the camp's sounding board and confidant than he is their actual spiritual leader. Mulcahy even notices when Sidney himself needs some counseling. And when he needs one, he usually turns to Hawkeye, of all people. Multiple times throughout the series, he questions his own usefulness amongst the destruction, and notes that the stakes are higher with his line of work.[to Hawkeye] When you lose a patient, he's out of his misery. When I lose a patient, he's lost his soul.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt
A competent surgeon from San Francisco, California. He's introduced as a clean-shaven, nice-guy replacement for Trapper John at the start of the fourth season. As the series goes on, he starts slipping in his sanity (although not quite as far as some); granted, in his very first episode, he has to deal with a farmer using his daughters as minesweepers and roadside surgery. Later he would grow a Seventies Porn Moustache, and start letting out another facet foreshadowed in a Mockumentary episode: a growing anger.
- Berserk Button: He's one of the nicest character on the show, but he has his buttons.
- Don't question his loyalty to his family. Aside from his rant in "Period of Adjustment", he threatens to "break every bone" in the body of a colonel who insinuated that he fathered a half-Korean child.
- He's also very protective of Hawkeye. He frequently stands up for him verbally and once completely lost his cool, threatening to "break the neck" of a soldier who tried to throttle his friend.
- Beware the Nice Ones:
B.J.: I...er...I'm sorry, Father.Mulcahy: Nothing to worry about, my son. beat Maybe you should try needlepoint.
- Generally, he was the resident Nice Guy family man on the show but when he lost his temper and let his frustration out he could get violent. Namely by getting stinking drunk, smashing the still, and punching Hawkeye in the face. Later, after the confrontation with the soldier who tried to hurt Hawkeye, he turned to Father Mulcahy, who suggested using his speedbag for a bit. B.J. knocked the thing off its mounting with one hit.
- He's also revealed to be an even better, more devious prankster than anyone else in camp.
- The Big Guy: Mike Farrell is one seriously tall man (then again, so were Wayne Rogers, McLean Stevenson and David Ogden Stiers). A Running Gag is his shoe size - according to Sidney in "Dear Sigmund," he wears size fifteen. Most of the time, though, he falls into Gentle Giant territory. He's also the only officer besides Mulcahy to ever be shown voluntarily exercising in any way.
- Break the Cutie: Gradually over the show's run. Doesn't quite complete, but he's waved goodbye to Hawkeye with his knuckles at least once.
- Character Development: In the earlier episodes, B.J. tends to be idealistic, passionate, but a bit naive whereas Hawkeye was the more cynical of the two. By the end, Hawkeye would frequently be the passionate one trying to enact some kind of change with B.J. acting as the cynical voice of experience restraining him.
- Cool Bike: He acquires one in "Blood and Guts" (although it's taken and subsequently wrecked by another character), and a different one in "Goodbye, Farewell and Amen". He's first seen on one in "The Yalu Brick Road," but it was presumably only borrowed long enough to get him and Hawkeye and their accidentally captured Chinese prisoner back to camp.
- Fatal Flaw: As with the other surgeons, pride. Hawkeye even mentions that every time one of his patients develops complications, B.J. starts getting worked up.
- Happily Married: He adores his wife Peg who is very supportive and loving spouse. They have a daughter named Erin, whom he also adores.
- Hidden Depths: Sidney is surprised to find out clean-cut, nice guy B.J. is the prankster in "Dear Sigmund." Also, his darker, angry side peeks out more often as the show goes out.
- The Lancer: Hawkeye's best friend.
- Meaningful Name: His mother's name is "Bea", his father's name is "Jay".
- Morality Chain: Tries to be this for Hawkeye in general, although he sometimes needs a little help too.
- Nice Guy: He's just a generally sweet-tempered, easy-going, affable sort of fellow. Makes him an interesting foil to Hawkeye, since the latter is a lot more of a scheming, hysterical, somewhat self-righteous jerk by comparison.
- Nice Shoes: Later in the series he started wearing a pair of black Converse All-Star sneakers.
- One Head Taller: According to a throwaway line in "The Kids," his wife is only 5'1". Mike Farrell stands at 6'3".
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: "Period of Adjustment" and "Wheelers and Dealers" both involve B.J. sinking into sullen depression and turning on other characters in response to a letter from Peg.
- The Prankster: Several episodes revolved around B.J.'s mastery of the prank gambit. It's established early on that this is one of his ways of coping with the stress of war.
- Pungeon Master: Not as much as Hawkeye, but he's quick to sling a pun or two when presented with the option.
- Real Men Wear Pink: Spent much of the last few seasons wearing a pink shirt whenever he wasn't in the O.R.
- Secret Keeper: In the series finale, Father Mulcahy begs him not to inform the others of Mulcahy's hearing loss. He never does.
- Spell My Name with an "S": One long-running argument is if his first name is actually spelled "BJ" or "B.J.". Sources like IMDb use "B.J." for consistency based on the spelling in the show's credits.
- Tranquil Fury / O.O.C. Is Serious Business: B.J. seldom wears his rage on the outside - when he explodes, look out.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: His relationship with Hawkeye occasionally crosses into this, especially in the later seasons.
- What Have I Done:
- As a result of a Sadistic Choice in a late episode.
- When he cheats on his wife, he deeply regrets it.
- Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: Hawkeye spends an entire episode trying to find out what "B.J." stands for. It turns out that's his actual name, given by his parents: Bea and Jay.
- Your Cheating Heart: Cheats on his wife with a nurse jilted by her husband. Unlike Trapper and Blake and Frank, he feels genuinely awful about it. Is tempted in a later season by a reporter, but resists temptation.
Col. Sherman Tecumseh Potter
The 4077th's commander following Blake's departure. A Regular Army officer and veteran of two previous wars. His eventual hometown is Hannibal, Missouri, where his wife still lives and yet again waits for her husband to come back from war. 1/4 Cherokee as well ... and onetime member of The Cavalry. He even gets a horse, Sophie, during the series.
- Awesome Mc Coolname
- Bait-and-Switch Tyrant: In his introductory episode. It may have been deliberate, establishing his authority before he settled into the role of Reasonable Authority Figure.
- Badass Pacifist: He admits he can't hit the side of a barn with the army-issue sidearm he carries, but his voice is enough to scare his men into submission.
- Berserk Button:
Col. Potter: [to Margaret's father] You're so busy being "Howitzer Al" Houlihan, you couldn't even tell your own daughter you love her?
- Cruelty to horses, or even borrowing Sophie without asking. Deliberately used by B.J. and Winchester to get rid of an unwanted companion. In one episode, distressed by the recent death of an old army buddy, he goes on a minor rant about he hates the fact that the main source of meat for South Koreans is horseflesh, which he finds barbaric.
- Only two people ever got away with taking Sophie without permission: Klinger (who was in the midst of an Heroic BSoD after he thought he had reenlisted in the army) and an old Korean cavalry soldier who was just wanting one last ride before he died. Both times, they were forgiven immediately.
- Never, ever put soldiers in danger for your own glory. He shuts down two of his old war buddies that get wounded because they took a line command in the name of promotion or glory - both times, it cost him their friendship. For that matter, he on one occasion got tough with a soldier who wanted to transfer to EOD to impress a couple of jerks in his unit.
- If you value your safety, don't hurt anyone under his command, physically or emotionally. Even if you're related to them.
- Do NOT attempt suicide on his watch.
- Cruelty to horses, or even borrowing Sophie without asking. Deliberately used by B.J. and Winchester to get rid of an unwanted companion. In one episode, distressed by the recent death of an old army buddy, he goes on a minor rant about he hates the fact that the main source of meat for South Koreans is horseflesh, which he finds barbaric.
- Bizarre Taste in Food: He likes raisin cookies, the ones with the stale raisins.
- Also, Fig Newtons and scotch. He even tells Hawkeye they're better when you dunk them.
- Colonel Badass: Potter served in the cavalry World War I, after which he earned a medical degree and served as a surgeon in both World War II and Korea. He is immensely proud of his Good Conduct Medal with gold clasp, which only an enlisted soldier is eligible for; identifying him as an Army mustang—an enlisted man who became an officer (even though it wasn't available when he was an enlisted man).
- Cool Old Guy
- Establishing Character Moment: Minutes after he arrived in camp, Klinger presented himself in a dress and rattled off a dozen reasons he should be discharged. Potter utterly deflated him and ordered him to dress in uniform.
- Later, after an episode of Hawkeye worrying this regular army man will be a far harsher taskmaster than Henry, Potter gets drunk with the gang and reveals he was just like Hawkeye in World War II. In fact, his Purple Heart injuries were actually from his still blowing up.
- Fan Boy: of The Western in general and the novels of Zane Grey in particular.
- A Father to His Men: He's a caring leader.
- Gosh Darn It to Heck!: Played with. He wasn't above dropping a "damn" or "jackass", but he had a long list of alternative phrases for a particular curse: Buffalo-cookies, horse-hockey, bushwah, cattle-chips, road-apples, mule-fritters, etc.
- Happily Married: He loves his wife who must be understanding and supportive. They have grown-up children and form a happy family.
- Heroic BSoD: In "Pressure Points," he loses his confidence because Hawkeye had to operate on one of his patients while he was away. During a briefing about phosphorous-tipped bullets, Potter loses control and howls about when they're going to "stop this stupid war!" He has a slightly lesser case during the episode "Point of View" where he forgot to call his wife on their anniversary. In over forty years of marriage he had never failed to give her a call, no matter where he was.
- Medal of Dishonor: The Purple Heart he won for being wounded in Guam. After all, it's not like he could turn it down and explain that the shrapnel came from his illicit still...
- Military Moonshiner: When stationed in Guam during World War II he had a still. He's experienced enough in moonshining that he gives Hawkeye some tips on how to improve his still.Potter: When I was on Guam, I had a still. One night it blew up! [leans close to the boys] That's how I got my Purple Heart.
- Old Soldier: It plays a part in one episode when he finds out that the last of his old squad has passed away.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: About once per season toward the end of the show's run, there'd be an episode in which the usually even-tempered Potter would take a sharp left turn into Grumpy Old Man territory, usually brought on by some personal or marital crisis.
- Papa Wolf: He fills in as a father to Radar, but the "Wolf" part comes in when Margaret's distant father comes to visit. When he sees her father's lack of tangible approval and Margaret's need for his respect, he absolutely lays into the man. And when someone in the 4077 is sending reports to I-Corps about how non-regulation the camp is, the pain in his voice when he tells Hawkeye and B.J. about this is heartbreaking. He's absolutely livid when he finds out his son-in-law had an affair on a business trip.
- Reasonable Authority Figure:
- He's career Army like Houlihan, and rather more authoritative and no-nonsense than his predecessor Blake, but still capable of relaxing certain regulations when needed. Including, with morale plummeting and a pair of corpsmen tasked to Kill It with Fire on some infected uniforms going overboard, giving in and instructing the camp to build "one regulation bon-type fire" as a way to blow off steam. Potter might be Regular Army, but he was enough of a Cool Old Guy that Hawkeye and B.J. saluted him in the final show.note
- Team Dad: Takes Henry's place as this, but puts his own spin on it. Potter is a lot more professional than Blake was, but he still manages to be empathic and caring to his men as well as an effecient commander.
- Up Through the Ranks: He started as an enlisted man in World War I.note By the time of the Korean War he's a colonel and surgeon.
- While You Were in Diapers: How Potter tells Flagg off when the latter questions the former's patriotism.
- You Know I'm Black, Right?: He's one-quarter Cherokee, and takes offense to Burns complaining about operating on a North Korean and phrasing it as Hawkeye getting cowboys and he Indians.
- You Look Familiar: Harry Morgan had previously played Major General Bartford Steele in the Season 3 episode "The General Flipped at Dawn".
- Your Cheating Heart: He admits to his unfaithful son-in-law that he was once unfaithful to his wife, and while she never found out, he knew and it was a worse punishment. However, while in Korea, he's never really tempted, and when Radar was worried he was going to have an affair with a visiting officer, he replied he just wanted to spend time with someone his own age for once, and it was strictly platonic. He was also in love with Doris Day, but she never knew about it.
Maj. Charles Emerson Winchester III
A (very) proud thoracic surgeon and pediatrician from Boston, he was initially stationed in Tokyo. Once Frank was Put on a Bus, the 4077th put in a call for a fourth surgeon. The call was taken by a colonel who Winchester was thoroughly trouncing at cribbage. One ill-timed boast later, and welcome to Uijeongbu.
- Actually Pretty Funny: He'll occasionally chuckle at one of Hawkeye's or B.J.'s jabs.
- Badass Boast: In his first episode, he gives one of these to Potter after learning he has to remain at the 4077th:Charles: But, know this: You can cut me off from the civilized world, you can incarcerate me with two moronic cellmates, you can torture me with your thrice-daily swill, but you cannot break the spirit of a Winchester. My voice shall be heard from this wilderness, and I shall be delivered from this fetid and festering sewer. [*smirk*]
- Bald of Awesome: He's a jerk and bald, but his Pet the Dog moments and awesome medical skills make him pretty cool.
- Berserk Button: Don't make fun of stutterers. Chiefly because his dearest sister has a strong one. It's notable that she's completely unconcerned and unselfconscious about it in her audio letter. Also, as a Harvard grad, he does not like being mistaken for a Yalie. To a lesser degree, don't be gauche with food and drink. He seemed physically pained when Klinger thought cognac should be chased with beer and needed to be put in the fridge so it wouldn't spoil. He also took it personally when some black marketeers (who had just ripped him off at gunpoint and stolen his clothes and his jeep) were drinking red wine with stuffed capon. Finally, when Hawkeye was trying to get his goat, the only insult that really bothered him was "Your parents voted for FDR — four times!"
- Also, never, ever, ask him to slander another person to save your skin. It'll take a bit for the button to fully depress, but when it does, you'll get a dose of righteous fury.
- Blue Blood: He comes from a distinguished old-money family from Boston, basically the American version of the aristocracy.
- Break the Haughty: Hawkeye and B.J. constantly tried to do this, but Hawkeye admitted he never was successful when writing his will:"To Charles Emerson Winchester, though we may have wounded your pride, you never lost your dignity. I therefore bequeath to you the most dignified thing I own: my bathrobe. Purple is the color of royalty."
- However, what did finally break him was the death of the Chinese musicians he'd been teaching to play Mozart in the final episode. After learning of it, he suffered a Heroic BSoD and smashed the record of the piece he tried to teach them. Later in the episode, he told the camp during his farewell speech, "For me, music has always been a refuge from this miserable experience... now it will always be a reminder."
- Can't Hold His Liquor: One episode involves him coming back from a medical conference after becoming completely smashed at a party due to spiked punch and quickly becoming the life of it. (When asked how much he had, he grudgingly replies, "Two, three... bowls.")
- Catchphrase: "Gentlemen." Used as his final line in the final episode.
- Extended into a My Friends... and Zoidberg gag a few times with Radar:"Gentlemen... and Corporal."
- Extended into a My Friends... and Zoidberg gag a few times with Radar:
- Compressed Vice: He becomes addicted to amphetamines in "Dr. Winchester and Mr. Hyde".
- Death Seeker: He once discovered two bullet holes in his cap, angled in such a way as to show that if he hadn't tripped the moment the shooter fired, he'd have died. He becomes obsessed with trying to find out what death is like, interrogating soldiers who were resuscitated and joining front line aid stations to be in the line of fire.
- Dr. Jerk: Jerk with a Heart of Gold type. That said, he had a reputation to maintain. At one point, he agreed to take Hawkeye's OD duty, so Hawkeye could get some leave, on one condition - that Hawkeye never told anybody that Winchester had done something nice. Mostly because then everyone would start asking him for favors. Overjoyed Hawkeye swears he'll never call him anything but completely rotten.
- Dreadful Musician: Ironically enough, he appears to be one of these, based on his French horn playing in "The Smell of Music".
- Later discussed with a patient whose civilian career was as a classical pianist, but suffered nerve damage to one of his hands in combat. Charles convinces him to continue his career, noting that he has a gift Charles could only dream of.Charles: I could play the notes, but I could never make the music.
- Later discussed with a patient whose civilian career was as a classical pianist, but suffered nerve damage to one of his hands in combat. Charles convinces him to continue his career, noting that he has a gift Charles could only dream of.
- Establishing Character Moment: Several in "Fade Out, Fade In", most notably his Badass Boast to Potter (see above) and turning the tables on Hawkeye in The Tag.
- Also his surgical skills. He's overwhelmed by the frenzied pace of "meatball" surgery, and can't adapt readily ("I do one thing at at a time, I do it very well, and then I move on"). But when a soldier comes in needing an operation the other surgeons have barely heard of before, Winchester steps up and carries it off flawlessly. Later in the series, he chastises a substitute doctor for being too slow, having adapted to "meatball" surgery himself, showing he adapted to the pace.
- Everyone Has Standards: He's pompous, arrogant, classist and a bit of a Social Darwinist, but he's disgusted by a bigoted major who assigns black men in his outfit to more dangerous duties. Also, he's just as desperate if not more so than everyone else to get out of Korea, but he refuses to take the opportunity to leave if it means wrecking Margaret's career in the process, and he rips up a prospective news article about him that could have gotten him transferred because the article wasn't accurate.
- Family Honor: He takes a great deal of pride, not to say excessive pride, in being a Winchester. In "Bottle Fatigue" he's outraged that his sister Honoria would besmirch the family name by getting engaged to... an Italian.
- First-Name Basis: He doesn't mind if his immediate subordinates call him "Charles", so long as they do not use "Charlie" or "Chuck". (Oddly enough, Hawkeye and B.J. usually respected this request.)
- Hahvahd Yahd In My Cah: Has a rather noticeable Boston accent.
- Happy Place: Listening to classical music is his mental escape from the war... until the finale, when tragic circumstances turn it into a reminder.
- Heroic BSoD:
- "The Life You Save" has him suffering one of these after discovering he was nearly killed by a sniper.
- And, of course, his reaction to the death of the Chinese musicians in the finale.
- Hidden Depths: His love of music, yet saddened by his inability to play musical instruments. He also has a very well hidden generous side, is respectful to those who earn his respect, loyal, and can be surprisingly compassionate when he thinks nobody will notice.
- Insufferable Genius: Winchester is a great surgeon... the problem is that he knows this all too well, and acts accordingly.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold:
- One Christmas Episode is the shining example — throughout the episode, everyone thinks of Winchester as a creep because when the 4077th hosted a group of Korean orphans with a potluck dinner, Winchester's contribution was a meagre tin of smoked oysters. However, Winchester had anonymously donated a large amount of hand-poured gourmet chocolate to the same orphanage a day previously. Winchester argues vehemently with the orphanage owner when he finds out that the chocolate was not given to the children but instead sold to the black market. He calms down when the owner explains why he did it — the chocolate would have made the children momentarily happy, but the sale generated enough money to buy enough staple foods for the orphanage for a month.Charles: And what, pray tell, is the catch of the day?Klinger: Oh, just one catch, Major. The source of this Christmas dinner must remain anonymous. It's an old family tradition.
- He passes up the chance to get the one thing he wants most - a transfer out of the unit and back to Tokyo - because it would involve destroying Margaret's career.Charles: As painful as this is for me to say, I must nevertheless unequivocally state...that...[whimper] Colonel Baldwin is lying through his teeth. He offered to have me reassigned to Tokyo if I would bear false witness against Major Houlihan. [turns to Baldwin] I've groveled! I have endured your insufferable cribbage playing. I have kissed your brass. But I will not — even for a return to that pearl of the Orient, Tokyo — lie to protect you while destroying a friend's career!
- In another episode, he dresses down an Engineer Captain who's been mercilessly making fun of a private with a severe stutter, going so far as to threaten the captain's service record to get him to stop. Winchester then goes out of his way to befriend the private to help him get over his self-consciousness.
- In the episode "Sons and Bowlers", he commiserates with Hawkeye over Hawk's dad going into surgery, and is visibly overjoyed when he hears that it turned out well.
- One Christmas Episode is the shining example — throughout the episode, everyone thinks of Winchester as a creep because when the 4077th hosted a group of Korean orphans with a potluck dinner, Winchester's contribution was a meagre tin of smoked oysters. However, Winchester had anonymously donated a large amount of hand-poured gourmet chocolate to the same orphanage a day previously. Winchester argues vehemently with the orphanage owner when he finds out that the chocolate was not given to the children but instead sold to the black market. He calms down when the owner explains why he did it — the chocolate would have made the children momentarily happy, but the sale generated enough money to buy enough staple foods for the orphanage for a month.
- Lonely Rich Kid / Parental Neglect: Hinted at. In one episode he admits to Hawkeye that he and his father have never been that close emotionally, while in another he tells Sidney Freedman that "I had my fill of psychiatrists by the age of nine".Charles: [to Hawkeye] My father's a good man. He always wanted the best for me. But, where I have a father... you have a dad.
- Neat Freak: Although the "Pressure Points" episode has him deliberately becoming The Pig-Pen as revenge against Hawkeye and B.J.'s slovenly housekeeping.
- Not So Above It All: He's just as capable of pranking as Hawkeye and B.J. are. In his first appearance, he even turns the tables on them with a snake-in-the-cot prank. He even would collude with pretty much the entire camp to help teach Hawkeye a lesson in one episode.
- In one episode he admits to enjoying Tom and Jerry cartoons, as well as The Three Stooges.
- In another, he finds himself giggling at the awful jokes a member of a visiting USO unit makes. He insists to Hawkeye (who didn't find the jokes funny at all) that they're not funny.Hawkeye: Then why are you laughing?Charles: [chuckling a little more] I don't know!
- Possibly his Ur-Example was pretending to help the paranoid Colonel Flagg investigate a supposed security leak at the camp...all the while setting Flagg up to embarass himself by accusing not only Colonel Potter, but the Mayor and the Chief of Police of Uijeongbu.Charles: [chuckling]Hawkeye: Charles, you didn't have anything to do with this, did you?Charles: Who, me? Course not. Wouldn't dirty my hands. Unless, of course, [begins to crack up] I could get a good laugh out of it. [loses it completely]
- On a subtler level, Charles complained about having to do "meatball surgery" instead of being able to take his time as he would in a stateside operating theater. Later in the series, he admonishes a younger, visiting doctor that he can't take it slow operating on patients.
- Number Two: The camp's executive officer after Burns' departure.
- Officer and a Gentleman: Sometimes the gentleman would cause the jerkass behavior; sometimes it would be used to crack the jerkass shell.
- Odd Friendship: Over the character's tenure, he and Klinger went from mutual disdain to something like respect.
- Old-School Chivalry: In one episode, he does not want to talk to Radar's elderly mother, angrily protesting when asked to. However, when he does so, he quickly switches to his polite, gentlemanly, and proper tone as he speaks to her.
- Out-of-Character Moment: Screwing over Korean peasants by buying scrip for a tenth of its value in "Change Day". This is nothing like blue blood, old money Charles, who later anonymously donates candies to an orphanage. It feels more like something Frank or Klinger might do. In fact, it almost plays like (and may in fact have been) a leftover Frank script that had the names changed.
- Same with the sequence early in Charles' appearances that had him giving a sedative to a wounded man without checking the label first to see if the technician gave him the right stuff. As it turned out, she hadn't, and the fellow almost died. Charles' excuse was the lack of light bulbs in post-op, but he hadn't even bothered to take the bottle over to where he could read it beforehand. He's also whiny and blame-shifting about it afterwards, which Hawkeye calls him on. This is completely unlike Charles, who'd already been shown to follow proper medical protocol even if it slowed things down, and may have been a rewritten Frank story.
- Pet the Dog: Frequently. Almost every few episodes. See Jerk with a Heart of Gold above.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: In another contrast to Burns, he's usually one of these when acting as C.O. in Potter's absence, letting the staff go about their usual business without interference. Well, save for appointing Klinger as his personal valet.
- Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!: He tries to employ this on occasion, though never to any avail.
- In "Fade Out, Fade In", when he protests to Col. Potter about being permanently assigned to the 4077:Charles: Sir, my father knows Harry Truman. He doesn't like him, but he knows him.Potter: [sarcastically] Fine. You have Dad call Harry, then have Harry call me, and then we'll work something out.
- In "The Winchester Tapes", as he records a taped message to his parents:Charles: Father, you must know someone influential who can get me out of here. Talk to Senator Griswold. After all, you paid good money for him.
- In "Fade Out, Fade In", when he protests to Col. Potter about being permanently assigned to the 4077:
- Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Frequently. Hawkeye impersonates him on the phone in one episode and resorts to using made-up words.
- Smart People Know Latin: Invoked and amusingly subverted. In "Snappier Judgment", Winchester defends Klinger at a court-martial for allegedly stealing a camera. At one point during the proceedings he objects on the grounds of "unum piliolae, acidus salicilicus tres in diem, post cibum"... which, as the presiding officer points out, translates to "aspirin three times a day".
- This is actually sort of justified, since this was exactly the way medical schools taught prescription dispensation for decades. It's a very legitimate and smart way of knowing some Latin, just not judicial Latin, and Charles was unfortunate enough to run into someone else who knew it.
- Smart People Play Chess: Occasionally seen playing chess against himself to pass his long periods of boredom in-between heavy casualties. He played it against Hawkeye and B.J. as well, usually winning without much difficulty.
- Smug Snake: Occasionally, whenever the writers wanted to emphasize his jerkass tendencies.
- Sophisticated as Hell: At the end of "The Winchester Tapes":Charles: [recording a taped letter for his parents] Mother and Dad, I will put this as eloquently and succinctly as possible... [stopping to pour tea, only to find B.J. has stuffed a rubber chicken into his teapot] Get me the HELL out of here!
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Subverted in his first episode; everyone who encounters his Dr. Jerk side assumes that he's the new Frank Burns, until they see him operate and realise that he really is just that good.
- Throughout his first season, he kind of dances around it, Depending on the Writer. Some episodes were clearly written with Frank in mind, making Charles greedy and conniving and trying to set him into the same role as Frank, making him a very slow surgeon instead of a bad surgeon and setting up a romance with Houlihan. This was quickly abandoned.
- Unsportsmanlike Gloating: What got him assigned to the 4077th. His cribbage partner Colonel Baldwin was in the middle of fielding a personnel request from Potter but was interrupted by Charles pointing out there'd been an error in the math: Baldwin didn't owe Charles $672.11, he owes him $672.17.
- What the Hell, Hero?: "Comrades in Arms" gets him in big trouble when Klinger finally manages to get through to a general that can send someone out to find Pierce and Houlihan, who are both trapped behind enemy lines during a North Korean offensive. Winchester tries to take advantage of it to get a transfer out while Klinger runs to get Potter, then ends up hanging up in a fit of pique when the general refuses to transfer him to Tokyo. When B.J. and Potter find out they are not pleased, especially when they'd been waiting nearly an entire day to get through to that general.
- Wine Is Classy: It was bad enough that the Korean black market crooks double crossed him and Father Mulcahy, robbed them of their goods (including the wine and gourmet food Winchester donated), their jeep, Winchester's uniform and polar suit — leaving him in only his long underwear — and refused to turn over the much-needed pentothal they came for; what really disgusted him about them was seeing them drink the red wine with stuffed capons!note
Capt. Oliver Harmon "Spearchucker" Jones
Originally introduced in the novel and movie as a ringer for an interunit football game, he vanished about midway through the show's first season, ostensibly after the network learned that there weren't any black surgeons in the theatre.
- Adaptation Distillation: A special case. When the first season episodes were recut for syndication to allow more time for commercials, most of Spearchucker's scenes were excised. If you've only seen the early episodes in their trimmed form, you will be surprised at how large his part is in the uncut originals.
- Aluminum Christmas Trees: There were, in fact, black surgeons in Korea. Jones was based on a surgeon who left a month before Richard Hooker arrived at the 8063.
- Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: Disappears without comment part-way through season one.
- Getting Crap Past the Radar: his nickname is technically a racist slur against black people, but was lampshaded in the original movie by him saying he earned it by competing in the javelin throw in college.
- Nice Hat: A bright orange floppy model.
- Token Minority Couple: At least one episode has him dating Nurse Ginger, who - you guessed it - is also black.
- You Look Familiar: Timothy Brown had previously played Corporal Judson in the original movie.
Capt. "Ugly" John Black
Another novel/movie character seen in the show's first season, Ugly John was an anesthesiologist hailing from Australia.
- Adaptational Attractiveness: Inverted. The book describes him as attractive, whereas on the show he's... well, ugly◊.
- Adaptational Nationality: Ugly John was American in the novel and film.
- Badass Mustache
- Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: Disappears inbetween Seasons 1 and 2.
- Fake Nationality: John Orchard was an Englishman.
- Nice Hat: His Australian bush hat.
- You Look Familiar: John Orchard later turned up in the Season 8 episode "Captains Outrageous", as the bribe-taking MP Muldoon.
Pvt. Igor Straminsky
The long-suffering mess hall and kitchen staffer, who tends to cope the bulk of the camp's disgust-fuelled abuse over the lousy quality of their rations.
- Butt-Monkey: Whenever people are upset about the food, they always take it out on him. After putting up with it for so long, he finally calls them out in "Morale Victory".
- Camp Cook/Lethal Chef: Although technically, he merely serves the awful food rather than cooking it. (The actual cook, a Sgt. Pernelli, was mostly unseen but did appear in a few later-season episodes.)
- The Ditz: He's frequently portrayed as a mild version of this. Most notably, in one episode revolving around the celebrations of a year spent in Korea, he takes the ears of corn lovingly grown by Father Mulcahy and creams them, affrontedly suggesting that next time he'll just roast them on the cob (which is what Mulcahey and the others had wanted in the first place) when he sees the Irish priest's angry disbelief.
- Dumb, but Diligent: He's not gonna win any medals for intelligence, but Igor is competent and hard-working enough that no one complains about him (they just complain about everything else his job entails).
- Never My Fault: He takes out his frustrations at not getting promoted on Hawkeye (one of the members of the promotion committee) despite the fact that he was unfit for promotion as shown during his oral exam when he couldn't answer basic Army questions that even a civilian would know.
- Sudden Name Change: In the "Bug Out" episode he's addressed as "Sowkowitz" by Hawkeye and B.J.
- In one episode, Frank demands his name. The actor accidentally gave his real last name of Maxwell and Larry Linville decided to Throw It In! and kept going.
Staff Sgt. Zelmo Zale
One of the minor sergeants who were part of the 4077's staff, originating from New York. Officially, he was rostered as the unit's supply sergeant. Appeared rarely, mostly notable for his bickering with Klinger and his hot temper.
- Alliterative Name: Zelmo Zale.
- Arch-Enemy: He and Klinger had a long-running feud.
- Brooklyn Rage: Very much a hot-blooded New Yorker.
- Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: After his last appearance (which comes in Radar's farewell episode, coincidentally enough) he vanishes without explanation.
- Gadgeteer Genius: Claims to be one, but his invention ends up failing spectacularly and injuring Hawkeye.
- Your Cheating Heart: In one episode we learn that he's keeping a Korean "moose" on the side. Not that that keeps him from going nuts when he learns his wife has been unfaithful as well.
Staff Sgt. Luther Rizzo
The unit's motor pool sergeant. A lazy, unambitious, sluggard from Louisiana who joined the Army because he thought it was a perfectly good skive. As he puts it, where else but the Army can you be a bum and actually get paid for it?
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Downplayed. He seems to be asleep whenever he's on duty, drunk or gambling whenever he's not, but the motor pool is always ready to go. He's also a pretty good teacher as all of the students who take his remedial driving course pass the written exam with high scores on the first try (except Col. Potter, who slept through most of it).
- Loan Shark: He puts the bite on Winchester (at 100% interest per day) in "That Darn Kid".
- Sleepyhead: Uses his assignment in the motor pool as an excuse to spend the day sleeping underneath the Jeeps that he's ostensibly repairing.Rizzo: Could you hold it down? There are people trying to work—Oh my gosh, it's night. Could you hold it down? There are people trying to sleep.
- Simple-Minded Wisdom: Not very bright, but he does show moments of wisdom like when he gives Klinger advice about how to handle army life.
- Southern Fried Sergeant
Lt. Kealani Kellye
The most prominent recurring nurse character, a Japanese-Hawaiian (or, in "Life Time," a Chinese-Hawaiian).
- A Day in the Limelight: "Hey, Look Me Over", the last season premiere, centers around her. Her actress was well-liked among the cast, so Alan Alda surprised her with the episode.
- Alliterative Name: Kealani Kellye
- Ascended Extra: Originally a background character, Kellye began to get more exposure and dialogue in the show's later years, culminating in a well-regarded A Day in the Limelight episode.
- The Danza: "Kellye" is Kealani's last name, but the first name of her actress, Kellye Nakahara.
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: This was the point of her A Day in the Limelight episode ("Hey, Look Me Over"), showing Hawkeye being a Jerkass to her (through seeing right through her and ignoring her) just because she doesn't measure up to Hawkeye's standards of beauty.
- On the other hand, she's been seen with Radar and a number of other guys, so it kind of fell flat, although her beef may have been because she seemed to be the only nurse that Hawkeye hadn't tried to sleep with.
- Girlish Pigtails: Her favored hairstyle.
- Sudden Name Change: AND HOW! As an extra, she was called "Nurse Able" or "Nurse Baker", which were the placeholder names for any generic nurses in the scripts (she shared the names with the other regular background nurses, as it was apparently assigned to whichever nurse had a line in the particular episode). As her character started to expand, she was assigned differing names — one episode she was Nurse Yamato, in another, she was Nurse Nakahara, before the writers finally settled on "Kealani Kellye".
Maj. Sidney Freedman
A psychiatrist assigned to the 121st EVAC Hospital in Seoul, he frequently visits the 4077 to assist on difficult cases... and to get in on the occasional poker game.
- Ambiguously Jewish: During an episode where a soldier thinks he is Jesus, this exchange takes place:B.J.: Come to see your savior?Sidney: Mine? No. Yours?B.J.: Who knows?
- A Day in the Limelight:
- "Dear Sigmund" is narrated by him as a "letter" to Freud.
- "War of Nerves" also gives him considerable focus.
- Book-Ends: In his first appearance on the show, he exits the scene by telling the doctors, "Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice. Pull down your pants, and slide on the ice." In the series finale, after deeming Hawkeye mentally fit, and knowing this will probably be the last time he sees everyone in the 4077th, he deliberately invokes this by once again exiting with that line.
- Deadpan Snarker: Not all the time, but when he's in the mood he can more than hold his own with Hawkeye and company. For instance, on being confronted with Klinger in his first appearance, he loses it a little:"You got me up here to ask about him? About that?... All the way from Seoul, to ask me what? Whether he needs a girdle under that? Whether his seams are straight?"
- Despair Event Horizon: In "War of Nerves", when it turns out one of Sidney's patients commited suicide. Father Mulcahy notes they're Not So Different.Sidney: When Pierce and Hunnicutt lose one, he's out of his misery. When I lose one, I've lost a mind.Mulcahy: When I lose one, I've lost a soul.
- Guest-Star Party Member: Occasionally joins the team to assist them with healing troubled patients, including one shift in the O.R. actually performing surgery.
- Hero of Another Story: He's very much like Hawkeye in terms of morals and ethics, just one from a different field of medicine and from a different unit.
- Layman's Terms: Freedman states that in his personal diagnosis of Flagg, he's "spooky".
- Meaningful Echo: As he's bidding farewell in the final episode, he repeats a line he'd used in Season 3's "O.R." when he first appeared. Alan Alda noted in the reunion special that he personally selected this line as Sidney's departing line because it was the one that resonated best."You know, I told you people something a long time ago, and it's just as pertinent today as it was then. Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: Pull down your pants and slide on the ice."
- My Nayme Is: As Hawkeye explains to Col. Flagg in one episode, Sidney's surname is spelled "with two 'E's, as in 'freedom'".
- Not So Different: Admits on more than one occassion that his work is very similar to the "meatball surgery" the regulars do - fix the damage as best you can without worrying about neatness or long-term issues, then move on to the next case. He treats folks to help get them out of immediate danger (such as using hypnosis on an Asian-American soldier to channel his Death Seeker tendencies into a more harmless physical tic), but says many of his patients will need much more help than he can provide them in the short-term.
- Not That Kind of Doctor: Technically, he is, although he's very hesitant to help with surgery in "O.R." when the camp is having a crisis, saying he hasn't done any sort of surgery since medical school. He's still able to help by taking the less serious cases.(Some fans have wondered about this over the years, but as a psychiatrist, Sidney actually is an M.D.; he attended medical school and would have trained at least basic surgery before deciding on a specialty. Psychologist's are the ones who have Ph.D's, not medical degrees.)
- Only Sane Man: Occasionally.
- Open Heart Dentistry: In "O.R." he has to lend a hand in surgery due to the 4077 overflowing with casualties. He helps out with simpler procedures and closing patients up and notes that it's been a very long time since he actually used these skills.
- The Shrink: Awesome variety. Psychology Today once lauded him as the "best TV shrink ever".
- Sudden Name Change: Freedman's first name is given as "Milton" in his initial appearance. (Perhaps the change was made so viewers wouldn't confuse him with the economist Milton Friedman?)
- There Are No Therapists: Thanks to him, averted. Though he mentions at least once that he could use a therapist sometimes. He has his own breakdown prior to "Dear Sigmund," due to the workload and losing cases due to the strain the war was putting on his patients.
- Took a Level in Kindness: In his first appearance, Sidney enjoys trolling Klinger and is somewhat apathetic. In later appearances, he's generally a friendly, compassionate guy to everyone and hopes that someday Klinger can get out on his own terms.
Lt. Col. (later Col.) Sam Flagg
A psychopathic governmental intelligence agent (read: spy) who occasionally blows through the 4077, always on the look-out for Communist subversives and so paranoidly overzealous that the doctors took a delight in leading him headlong into disasters of his own making.
- CIA Evil, FBI Good: Although he keeps it a little fuzzy who he works for in his first appearance, the writers eventually settled on him being CIA.
- Cloud Cuckoolander: Hard to believe otherwise. Likely his defense against the Red Scare. He's so secretive that by his own word even he doesn't know the truth, keeping himself in a state of total confusion.
- Flanderization: His goofier antics showed up later in the series.
- Gung Holier Than Thou: The Trope Namer.
- Harmless Villain: He's more dangerous to himself than anyone else, and when Potter took charge he made it fairly clear that he tolerated Flagg's shenanigans because in the end he wasn't likely to do any actual damage to the unit or the patients.
- Incredibly Obvious Tail: He is a master of this.
- Iron Butt-Monkey: Flagg has been known to injure himself on purpose simply to make his charade convincing. Hawkeye lampshades this in an episode while referring to a previous one, saying "If we had more guys like you, we'd have less guys like you."
- Shown to a triumphant degree in one of his earliest appearances, where he wrecks the VIP Tent and himself, both on purpose to make it look like a soldier he'd let go escaped violently. It gets so absurd that at the climax of the scene, we see Flagg judging the best angle of attack before rushing headfirst into a cabinet!
- Jack Bauer Interrogation Technique: It's implied that he uses this when given the opportunity.
- Actually shown (and out of character for Flagg, played chillingly straight) in one episode, where he tries to interrogate a recovering North Korean by bending his IV line, saying "You give me what I need, and I'll give you what you need." Radar, of all people, stops him, exclaiming "You can't just go around threatening people's blood!"
- Jerkass: He's an aggressively domineering, demeaning, arrogant boor of a man.
- Master of Disguise: He likes to think he is this, and gets really upset whenever anyone sees through his disguise. Still doesn't keep the others from mocking his attempts, however.Charles: Oh Colonel Flagg. Sorry, I didn't recognize you without your garbage can. Don't you have a dark one for evening?
- Also:Potter: Nice suit. Your clown outfit in the cleaners?
- Noodle Incident: Anything he mentions usually is one of these. Apparently he was a showgirl in Vegas at the Sands for six weeks. And he's going to need that cover of Louise Kline next week in Tokyo. The MP crew that shows up in his last appearance apparently are familiar with him hunting for spies where there aren't any.
- Patriotic Fervor: He even manages to outdo Frank Burns in the jingoism department.
- Spy Speak: Part of his comedic act was constantly using this. He sent a telegram to his superiors - at a P.O. Box in Tijuana."Mary had a little lamb. My dog has fleas. Mairzy doats and dozy doats and I'll be home for Christmas. Your loving son, Queen Victoria."
- Stealth Hi/Bye: He thinks he's good at this but always fails miserably.Hawkeye: The "wind" just broke his leg!
- Sudden Name Change: Edward Winter first appeared in Season 2's "Deal Me Out" as a CID man named Captain Halloran. It's Fanon that the character is really Flagg using one of his many aliases.
- In Season 4's "Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler?", Flagg encounters Sidney Freedman, telling him, "We played poker once." This further supports the theory that Flagg and Halloran are one and the same, since the latter had indeed played poker with Sidney in "Deal Me Out".
- Too Kinky to Torture: Hard to tell if it's an actual fetish, but Flagg seems extremely willing to do physical violence to himself at the slightest prompting. Over the course of the show, he purposely crashed a helicopter, broke his own arm (twice!), and bashed his head into a wooden cabinet—all in the line of duty, of course. He also mentioned that he trained himself not to laugh by poking himself with a cattleprod while watching shorts from The Three Stooges. Another intelligence officer mentioned that Flagg once drove his jeep into a wall and set himself on fire.Hawkeye: If we had more men like you, we'd have less men like you.
- You Look Familiar: Edward Winter appeared in the Season 2 episode "Deal Me Out" as Captain Halloran from the CID. Since he's a spy, Captain Halloran could have easily been Flagg in disguise; it's never confirmed, but it is lampshaded in Season 4's "Quo Vadis, Captain Chandler?":Col. Flagg: (to Sidney Freeman): I'm Colonel Flagg, we played poker together once.
The owner of a small bar situated just outside the 4077, she provided a refuge for many of its personnel away from the routine of the camp.
Lt. Col. Donald Penobscott
An officer from a wealthy family whom Margaret meets and falls in love with whilst on leave; the relationship is so sincere that they are eventually married, something that causes Frank Burn to have a mental breakdown. Unfortunately for Major Houlihan, the Lt. Colonel is an adulterous tightass who tries to dominate her and steals her paychecks whilst sleeping around behind her back, an abuse that eventually pushes her to the extent of divorcing him.
- Blue Blood: Apparently. Which doesn't stop him from being a tightfisted cheapo.
- Big Ol' Unibrow: Hawkeye indicated that he had one, but it wasn't there in his two appearances (For that matter neither was the tattoo on his bicep that Margaret had mentioned.).
- Financial Abuse: His system with Margaret is she sends him every paycheck and in return, he sends her an allowance of thirty dollars a week (Adjusted for inflation, equal to $263.16 up to $291.26 depending on what year of the war you're adjusting for), ostensibly so they can buy their dream house after the war's over. When there's a goof up with the pay, and Margaret appeals to him for a week's advance, he refuses to give her a penny. By the way, he and his family are supposed to be rich.
- The Ghost: For nearly all of Season 5 until his appearance in "Margaret's Marriage".
- The Scrooge: Margaret calls him "conservative." Everyone else calls him cheap.
- Your Cheating Heart: Though it destroys Margaret when she finds out, she decides to give him another chance. She doesn't file for divorce until she finds out Donald has requested a transfer without bothering to tell her.
Capt. Sam Pak
- Deadpan Snarker: His mouth was even faster than Hawkeye's.
- Special Guest: He only appeared in two Season 2 episodes.
- Surprisingly Good English: Given he's supposed to be a South Korean officer.
- Yiddish as a Second Language: Mostly a case of Throw It In! as Pat Morita would pepper his lines with Yiddish.
Capt. Calvin Spalding
A singing, guitar-playing surgeon who appears in three Season 3 episodes.
- Deadpan Snarker: In "Big Mac", he sings Henry and Frank the special ditty he's composed for Gen. MacArthur's imminent visit to the 4077th, and it's a masterpiece of smart-assedry.Well, it's not Corregidor, you know, it's only Korea
It's a lousy little war, but we'd still love to see ya
And I'm sure we can scrounge up a beach
And you can splash in and give us a speech
With your corncob pipe and your five gold stars.
- Greek Chorus: He kind of serves as this.
- Shout-Out: His name clearly derives from Groucho's character in the Marx Brothers' Animal Crackers.
Sgt. (later Pvt.) Jack Scully
A front-line infantryman who turns up a few times as a potential suitor for Margaret.
- Politically Incorrect Hero: Scully is a decent enough guy for the most part, but in his third and final appearance he's revealed to have severely retrograde (if not uncommon for The '50s) notions about gender roles, which is what finally leads Margaret to break things off with him.
- Rank Up: Inverted in his third and last appearance, when he's been busted down to a private for punching an officer.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: In his first appearance (in "A Night at Rosie's") he's AWOL from the front line, explaining that he "decided to go away for a little rest" after an especially intense battle.
- Sudden Name Change: His first name is "Jerry" in his first appearance and "Jack" in the other two.
The camp PA announcer
- Catchphrase: "Attention, all personnel..."
- Deadpan Snarker: Frequently.
- Leaning on the Fourth Wall: He sometimes will even break the fourth wall during the credits.
- No Name Given: Not once are we given his name or rank.
- Not So Above It All: Even he once got involved in a prank at B.J.'s expense... quickly apologizing once B.J. realized what happened, of course.
- The Voice: Nor do we ever see him, although both Todd Susman and Sal Viscuso had onscreen appearances as different characters.
Capt. Jonathan Tuttle
The non-existent "star" of a single early-series episode; Captain Jonathan Tuttle is most unique for the fact that Hawkeye and Trapper manage to make everyone believe he exists, when he never did. Extrapolated from an imaginary friend Hawkeye would use to try and get out of trouble when he was little, Capt. Tuttle was used by Hawkeye as a way to secretly milk an extra Captain's salary from the army and donate to local needy Korean civilians. When an investigation got under way, Hawkeye and Trapper had to fool the whole camp into believing he genuinely existed - and then that he had been killed off before he could actually be met face to face.
- The Ace: "The best damn OD we ever had", according to Col. Blake.
- All Germans Are Nazis: Played with. A jealous Frank (before becoming Tuttle's new best friend) thinks Tuttle is a Nazi (despite being from Michigan) for having gone to a German medical school.
- Character as Himself: Is billed this way.
- Crazy-Prepared: How he died jumping out of a helicopter with everything a surgeon needs... except his parachute.
- Druid: Reformed. ("They're allowed to pray at bushes.")
- Heroic Sacrifice: Hawkeye claims he jumped out of a plane to conduct field surgery, but forgot his parachute.
- Imaginary Friend: Tuttle was originally one of these this in Hawkeye's childhood.Hawkeye: If anybody said, "Who knocked over the garbage?" I said, "Tuttle." They said, "Who broke that window?" "Tuttle." "Who wet the bed?"Trapper: "Tuttle!"Hawkeye: He had no control at all.Trapper: So, when you got drafted...Hawkeye: He got drafted.Trapper: Just in case you wet your cot.Hawkeye: Precisely.
- Invented Individual: Hawkeye and Trapper do this so they can help Korean civilians.
- Mr. Fanservice: Hard to say for sure, considering the above trope, but his physical description — 180 pounds, 6'4", auburn hair, hazel eyes — certainly gets Margaret interested.Trapper: [As Hawkeye rattles off the description he's writing down] Hawkeye, I think I'm in love.
- Too Good for This Sinful Earth: Hawkeye describes him as such during his eulogy, especially in his actions to donate 14 months worth of pay and his GI insurance to the orphanage.
Captain Tuttle's replacement.
That is all.
♪ My Blue Heaven ♪