Some prominent characters seen in the French Puppet Show Les Guignols de l'Info.
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French TV Personalities
Canal+
PPD
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
The host of the show, a puppet based on TF1 prime time news presenter Patrick Poivre d'Arvor ("PPDA" in acronym form, the A was taken off for the puppet).
- The Artifact: In Real Life, Patrick Poivre d'Arvor stopped presenting the prime time news of TF1 in 2008, but that didn't prevent this version of him from presenting Les Guignols de l'Info for close to another decade.
- Character Catchphrase:
- "You're watching the ancestor of Internet, good evening."
- "You're watching too much television, good evening."
- Channel Hop: He works for Canal+ in the show and not for TF1.
- Deadpan Snarker: Once a news ends, he oftens leaves a dry humor comment on it.
- Green-Eyed Monster: He once strangled his fellow presenter Guy Lux for being more popular than him and during Harry Roselmack's tenure on the show as his co-host, he was always rude and insulting to him.
- Nice Guy: He's unfailingly polite and generally well-meaning, except when he interviews terrorists and the like or gets a little hypocritical. Or gets replaced as host.
- Only Sane Man: Often facepalmed after hearing the others' antics. He was the Audience Surrogate and his reactions were meant to matched the spectator's.
Michel Denisot
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on TV producer and host Michel Denisot, who worked at Canal+ until 2013.
- Apologises a Lot: He always says "Désolé..." on a sheepish tone after failing to do something.
- Character Catchphrase: "Désolé..." ("Sorry").
- Failure Is the Only Option: It doesn't matter what he plans to do for Canal+, it's always doomed to end up an Epic Fail.
Dominique Farrugia
A puppet based on comedian Dominique Farrugia, who worked at Canal+ for over 20 years.
- Annoying Laugh: His laughs sound like sea lion barkings, and actually attracted such animals on set on occasion.
- Gag Penis: He likes drawing penises. Even when he has to do statistics, somehow the curves he draws always end up looking like penises.
- The Hyena: He laughs a lot.
Alain De Greef
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on Canal+'s director of programs from 1984 to 2001 who created the show.
- The Alcoholic: If he doesn't look sleepy half the time, then he's drunk the other half.
- Character Catchphrase:
- "Ça va pas..." ("Not going well...").
- " 'cule un mouton.." ("-uck a sheep in the ass...") whenever he has to explain why someone sodomising a sheep is funny.
- Formula for the Unformulable: He spends quite a few minutes explaining to a Canal+ jury how a journalist sodomizing a sheep is funny... with equations and statistics.
- Life of the Party: Spends most of his time partying in a nightclub where Corona's "This is the Rhythm of the Night"
plays. - One-Hour Work Week: He's employed by Canal+ to do exactly one thing: approving the programs for the year, with a signature on a paper. He spends the rest of his time partying in nightclubs.
- Sleepyhead: Since he spends his nights in nightclubs, he always looks like he's ready to sleep by day.
- The Unintelligible: He mumbles a lot when speaking.
Laurent Weil
A puppet based on Canal+'s chief movie journalist. Often used during the annual Cannes Film Festival season.
- Failure Is the Only Option: Whenever he tries to have an interview with actors or directors, something happens and he doesn't manage to get one.
- In 2005, each time he tried to interview director Emir Kusturica, a fanfare of Serbian peasants showed up and played the melody of "Daddy, Don't Ever Die on a Friday" (from Kusturica's movie Black Cat, White Cat), ruining the interview.
- In 2006, he tried to interview prominent movie stars. The only "stars" he managed to interview? Insignificant animated film characters, King Kong and Christopher Lambert (who's a complete moron in the show).
Denis Chalandier & Michel Lecomte
Denis Chalandier is a fictional Canal+ journalist, and he's always accompanied by Michel Lecomte, his sarcastic cameraman.
- Brutal Honesty: Michel voices his thoughts out without filter, much to the embarrassment of Denis.
- Deadpan Snarker: Michel always sarcastically comments on the journalist's stupidity or the stupidity of the news he's filming. It can veer into Brutal Honesty.
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: Denis gets absolutely zero respect from Michel and never finds himself able to react or make Michel shut up.
- The Faceless: Michel's face is never seen.
- Servile Snarker: Michel audibly wishes he had another job than having to film a stupid journalist and never stops his jabs at Denis or the news subject.
- Those Two Guys: They're always seen/heard together.
- Too Dumb to Live: Michel in particular. During an interview with Osama bin Laden in his cave, he keep indirectly insulting him, being rude and asking him outrageous questions.
TF1
Patrick Le Lay
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on the CEO of the TF1 channel from 1988 to 2008.
- Brutal Honesty: Always bluntly tells how he's just there to milk stupid TV programs to make money off the "available brain time" of French viewers.
- Corrupt Corporate Executive: He only cares about audience ratings (in his Truth in Television words "We sell available brain time to Coca Cola"), no matter how stupid and brainless the programming. He can get as amoral as trying to imitate a Reality TV from rival channel M6 with a woman having to escape a bunch of rapist candidates... with songs.
- Jerkass: Quite an unpleasant jerk overall.
- Money, Dear Boy: He lives and breathes "making money through appeal to the Lowest Common Denominator" and doesn't hide it.
Thierry Roland
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on sports journalist and soccer commentator Thierry Roland.
- Hollywood Tourette's: A sketch suggested that he is afflicted with Tourette Syndrome considering the amount of insults he regularly lets out... only to conclude he's just foul-mouthed.
- Jerkass: He can't do a phrase without insulting the person he talks to, and it's actually not Tourette Syndrome, and mocks soccer players on a regular basis when commenting matches.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: He's quite foul-mouthed.
Pascal Bataille & Laurent Fontaine
Puppets based on TV show hosts Pascal Bataille (right on the picture) and Laurent Fontaine (left on the picture), who most famously hosted the confession show Y a que la vérité qui compte ("Only Truth Matters").
- Fat and Skinny: Fontaine is shorter and fatter than Bataille .
- Four Eyes, Zero Soul: Fontaine always has a sadistic expression on his face, and wears glasses.
- Lean and Mean: Bataille is tall and lean, and sadistic.
- The Men in Black: One sketch had them as "the Men in Blue and Red" (referring to TF1's color pattern), agents of TF1 who are tasked to find healthy and balanced families who don't watch much TV (and no mind-numbing TV especially) in order to neuralize them so they'll forget about their fulfilling lives and make them continually watch TF1's stupid cash grab programs instead.
- Those Two Guys: They're always seen together.
Jean-Pierre Foucault
A puppet based off veteran TV host Jean-Pierre Foucault, who hosted variety shows and the French version of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? among others.
- Character Catchphrase: There's a Running Gag in which, whenever he hosts Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?, he always brings up "Obi-Wan Kenobi" as the "D" answer.
France 3
Marc-Olivier Fogiel & Zaza the Hyena
A puppet based on TV and radio host Marc-Olivier Fogiel. He is often accompanied by his pet hyena, Zaza.
- Heinous Hyena: Zaza laughs along with Fogiel whenever he mocks/humiliates someone.
- The Hyena: Laughs with glee at the woes of people he invites in his shows. It's even invoked with his literal hyena pet, who laughs along with him.
- Jerkass: Fogiel cannot utter a phrase without trying to find something to Kick the Dog out of and verbally humiliate someone, be it people he interviews in his shows or those he talks to elsewhere (including PPD). He even laughed at PPD once... for resembling a human being, implying he's proud of being a jerk of inhuman proportions.
- Raised by Wolves: In a skit parodying The Jungle Book, he was saved as a baby by a female gorilla and left to be raised by... hyenas. Seeing how he turned out, the gorilla regretted she didn't do the same thing as Bagheera, that is, giving him to wolves.
- Unusual Pets for Unusual People: Fogiel is a jerkass supreme, and has a hyena pet who laughs with him.
French Heads of State, Governments & Politics
Presidents of the Fifth French Republic
Charles de Gaulle
A puppet based on Charles de Gaulle, who was the leader of the Free French during World War II and President from 1958 to 1969.
- Celebrities Hang Out in Heaven: He was often seen in sketches set in Heaven.
- Posthumous Character: He died 18 years before the show debuted, all of his depictions in it are either reconstitutions of historical events or Celebrities Hang Out in Heaven.
- Winged Humanoid: He has angel wings with feathers in Heaven. They get replaced by Apple-made wings when Steve Jobs arrives there after his passing.
François Mitterrand
A puppet based on François Mitterrand, who was President from 1981 to 1995.
- Character Catchphrase: "Béciles!" (shortened "Imbeciles!").
- Celebrities Hang Out in Heaven: He has showed up in Heaven from time to time after the death of his Real Life counterpart in 1996.
- Our Presidents Are Different: Combined "Jerkass" and "Scheming", mostly.
- Stealth Insult: A master at delivering backhanded compliments.
- Surrounded by Idiots: How he felt, since the intelligence of most government members and politicians surrounding him in the show at the time couldn't match his.
- Voodoo Doll: Had one that he used against political personalities he had particular hatred against.
- Winged Humanoid: He has angel wings with feathers in Heaven. They get replaced by Apple-made wings when Steve Jobs arrives there after his passing.
Jacques Chirac
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on Jacques Chirac, who was President from 1995 to 2007.
- Big Eater: The show exaggerated his love of the veal head, almost turning him into an Extreme Omnivore loving the weirdest dish of French Cuisine.
- Breakout Character: Easily the most popular character from the show, and the puppet kept reappearing for quite some time after the end of Chirac's presidency in Real Life.
- Corrupt Politician: But of course, though he's always done his best to hide it behind his charmer persona and endearingly goofy antics.
- Hot Guy, Ugly Wife: The show portrayed his wife Bernadette like an ugly crone while playing up his charmer persona.
- Hopeless with Tech: He was consistently shown to be unable to use computers, and always referred to the computer mouse as a "mulot" (a sort of farm mouse).
- I Hate Past Me: Played for Laughs in a sketch where he was furious against his past self making empty promises and now having to uphold them now that he was president.
- Jerkass to One: Chirac really really hated Nicolas Sarkozy, He was barely cordial with him, never missed a chance to mock his height, wrecked his favourite restaurant and was sad that Sarkozy survived a syncope.
- Lovable Rogue: He's an unrepentant crook, but he's also charming as hell.
- Mascot: For a time his face was used more than PPD's to advertise the show.
- Obfuscating Disability: He once simulated blindness in order to wreak havoc in Nicolas Sarkozy's favorite restaurant.
- Obfuscating Insanity: His main strategy whenever he is accused of something? Pretending he's getting senile with age.
- Our Presidents Are Different: Combines "Personable", "Corrupt", "Scheming", "Buffoon", "Playboy" and, yes, a bit of "Unmodified".
- Superhero: Had a superhero identity with the self-explanatory moniker "Super-Liar" during the 2002 presidential campaign.
- Refuge in Audacity: Sometimes used this to escape scrutiny during scandals or to make himself more popular, like pretending he was born in the French Caribbean and was formerly black.
- Wacky Parent, Serious Child: The wacky parent to his daughter: Claude, who always called him by his last name, like her real counterpart was known to do.
Nicolas Sarkozy
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on Nicolas Sarkozy, who was Minister of the Economy in 2004, Minister of the Interior ("First Cop of France") from 2005 to 2007, and eventually President from 2007 to 2012.
- Attention Whore: One sketch had him being addicted to cameras, frantically seeking to be filmed one way or another.
- Bad Boss: He was never kind to his ministers and among other things, he refused to give them the money he embezzled from Liliane Bettencourt despite them participated in his scheme. He tricked the minister Rama Yade to start the Vendée Globe while she was on a participating boat after she contradicted him in the press and forced his ministers to spent their summer holidays in the less touristic (and most rainy) parts of France while he got to enjoy a private beach on the French Riviera the year before the presidential election.
- Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Tried to be this during his tenure as a Minister under Chirac's presidency by pretending to be a Sycophantic Servant but Chirac wasn't fooled.
- Conspicuous Consumption: He loves to buy expensive things just because they're expensive and show off, especially if he does so with money he embezzled.
- Elder Abuse: Once the Liliane Bettencourt affair was revealed, the show portrayed Sarkozy as the one directly embezzling the elderly and filthy rich heiress of L'Oréal by taking advantage of her senility like pretending to be De Gaulle or sending his government trick or treating her for money in the middle of summer.
- The Napoleon: Short in size, and has a bad temper to match this.
- Nepotism: The show had a field day mocking Sarkozy's various attempts at putting his inept son Jean in posts of high responsibility.
- Nouveau Riche: How he was portrayed in his early presidency, who among other things tried to impress Obama with a litteral golden plane.
- Our Presidents Are Different: Combines "Corrupt", "Jerkass", "Scheming" and "Buffoon".
- The Starscream: Prior to the 2007 election, he tried everything to get rid of Jacques Chirac and usurp the presidency, while being a minister in Chirac's government.
- Ugly Guy, Hot Wife: Since he's married to singer and model Carla Bruni, which the show treated as a Trophy Wife.
François Hollande
Voiced by: Nicolas Canteloup
A puppet based on François Hollande, the First Secretary of the Socialist Party who became President from 2012 to 2017.
- Big Eater: Before he lost weight at least.
- Bumbling Dad: Was this for Emmanuel Macron when the latter was portrayed as a baby.
- The Ditz: Portrayed as mostly stupid and having ended up President almost by accident.
- Formerly Fat: Got a new, more slender puppet following his Real Life counterpart's loss of weight. Then one day failed 2012 Socialist candidate to the presidential candidacy Martine Aubry put him through a sadistic Saw-like ordeal, forcing him to eat a ton of sausages and a gigantic biscuit to free himself, causing him to be fat again.
- The Klutz: Quite clumsy in addition to being clueless.
- Our Presidents Are Different: Mostly "Buffoon".
- Verbal Tic: Often lets out something akin to "Uuuuhuuugghhh" with a Simpleton Voice, which adds to his dumbness/cluelessness, especially after Epic Fails of his making.
Emmanuel Macron
Voiced by: Sandrine Alexi (infant); Mathieu Schalk (adolescent and adult)
A puppet based on Emmanuel Macron, the former Minister of the Economy who became President in 2017.
- Clueless Boss: He doesn't understand why French people don't feel like partying and talking in Franglish like he does... while the country is constantly under the pressure of social and economic conflicts.
- Final Season Casting: One of the final major characters added to the show, which was on its death throes when Macron came to power in 2017 (the show was cancelled in 2018).
- Foreign Culture Fetish: Peppers his phrases with a lot of US English and even calls France "The United States of France".
- Maurice Chevalier Accent: Speaks English with a pretty bad accent.
- Soap Opera Rapid Aging Syndrome: In season 27 (2014-2015), Macron was originally an infant. This was changed in season 28 (2015-2016) where he became an adolescent and again in seasons 29 and 30 (2016-17 and 2017-18, respectively) where he finally became an adult.
Prime Ministers
Lionel Jospin
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based off the Socialist politician who became the cohabitation Prime Minister from 1997 to 2002 under Jacques Chirac (who was a Right Wing president).
- The Bore: One sketch had François Hollande perform an exorcism on him to try making him less boring (his elitist tastes include, among other things, Roland Petit's ballets, the films of Raúl Ruiz and the literature of Alain Finkielkraut). Even amidst the exorcism, Jospin admitted (and is content with) being a bore.
- Butt-Monkey: Whatever Epic Fail the cohabitation government had (some due to President Chirac), Chirac himself always arranged for him to get the backlash.
- Character Catchphrase: "PAYS DE MEEEEERDE!" ("SHITTY COUNTRYYYY!"). He ended most of his sketches with this after his humiliating defeat at the Presidential Election of 2002, when Jean-Marie Le Pen pulled a better score than him that eliminated him at the first round.
- Heroic BSoD: He was in a catatonic state after his defeat and until the end of the second round of 2002.
- My Greatest Failure: Can't get over having been eliminated at the first round of the 2002 Presidential Election.
- Took a Level in Jerkass: His defeat of the 2002 Presidential Election turned him from a very boring but relatively well-meaning character to someone that could barely make a sentence without insulting France and its people.
Other French Politicians
Bernard Tapie
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on Bernard Tapie, former minister, deputy and venture capitalist (in)famous for his business ventures that tended to turn into financial scandals.
- Catchphrase Insult: Always calls PPD "Joe la Fiotte" ("Joe the Fag").
- Corrupt Corporate Executive: Often tries to talk himself out of the news whenever his infamous financial affairs come into the spotlight.
- Corrupt Politician: He's rather not talk about the affairs he was involved in during his political mandates (and not the others either).
- Sensitive Guy and Manly Man: Always acts as the "manly man" whenever he's paired with another politician or businessman. It happened regularly when he was paired with Michel Rocard during the Mitterrand presidency.
Roselyne Bachelot
Voiced by: Sandrine Alexi
A puppet based on right wing politician Roselyne Bachelot, who was Minister of Youth and Sports then Minister of Health under the presidency of Jacques Chirac, then Minister of Solidarities and Social Cohesion under Nicolas Sarkozy, then Minister of Culture under Emmanuel Macron, then radio and TV host. Yeah.
- Achievements in Ignorance: Managed to confuse a T-800 so much thanks to her sheer stupidity that he gave up his mission of killing her to save the world from her catastrophic tenure as a Minister. Reasoning than no one would be dumb enough to let her be one in the first place.
- The Alleged Expert: No matter the ministry she held, she was always completely inept at the subject and most of her interviews with PPDA either ended with him having to explain her some simple concept to her, and her failing to understand, or PPDA just giving up on the interview.
- Character Catchphrase: "Ah bon?" ("Really?" / "Is that so?") in surprise whenever she learns something she was supposed to know and didn't (which happens pretty much all the time).
- Cloudcuckoolander: Quite the airhead, and comes to conclusions that can only result from Insane Troll Logic.
- Comically Missing the Point: Some of her "best" ideas are this, like proposing that oil tankers should travel without oil to prevents oil spills.
- The Ditz: She's quite stupid and completely unaware of it.
- Lack of Empathy: Mainly during her tenure as Minister of Ecology. While discussing catastrophic floods, she said that the victims should adapt by surelevating their furniture and makes pottery from the mud in their house.
- Limited Wardrobe: Always dressed in the same pink suit.
- Saying Too Much: After the time her real counterpart accidentelly revealed that Chirac needed hearing aid, She was sometimes seen speaking way too much about things. Among other things, she spoke way too much about Sarkozy's height insecurities when asking what kind of president he would be or her and her colleagues using their journalist card to have fun in sex-shop.
Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based on Dominique Strauss-Kahn, an economist, socialist politician and sex offender.
- Character Catchphrase: "Excusez-moi, je sors de la douche" ("Pardon me, I just got out of the shower").
- Dirty Old Man: Often makes Double Entendres, and flashed chambermaid Nafissatou Diallo (the Real Life sexual assault case defender).
- Limited Wardrobe: Following the infamous real life sexual assault case, the puppet always wore a cheetah bathrobe.
- Sexophone: He's a Dirty Old Man and is always accompanied by sax music.
Jean-Luc Mélenchon
A puppet based on Jean-Luc Mélenchon, a former Socialist politician who founded the far-left party Parti de Gauche (renamed La France Insoumise in 2016).
- Ax-Crazy: He's quite unhinged and rabid against the capitalistic order, "bourgeois" and right wing parties, and he's prone to murderous rage.
- Death Glare: His default expression is to look angry at everyone and everything around him, which gets even worse when he's Ax-Crazy.
- Dirty Communists: The main figure of the far-left in France since The New '10s, and he's portrayed as quite Ax-Crazy and even cutting heads off.
- Grumpy Old Man: When he's not being Ax-Crazy, he rants all the time.
- Reign of Terror: Several sketches showed him like a 18th century revolutionary who's eager to send people to the guillotine.
Foreign Politics
USA
Bill Clinton
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based off the 42nd U.S. President.
- Disproportionate Retribution: He's sick and tired of foreign news talking endlessly about his sex scandal with Monica Lewinsky, so each time he hears the news from a country, he attacks the country with missiles, which amounts to a lot after a while. That's still not enough, so by the end he simply torches the Earth with nukes.
George W. Bush
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based off the 43rd U.S. President.
- The Ditz: Possibly the most stupid character ever seen in the show. Much Take That! was involved especially as a response to anti-French sentiment in the USA in 2003 when France refused to support the invasion of Iraq.
- Manchild: Essentially portrayed as a toddler in a grown man's body.
- Our Presidents Are Different: "President Buffoon" through and through.
- Shared Family Quirks: The show's version of George H. W. Bush was also portrayed as a stupid Manchild (only during George W.'s mandates however).
- Throw the Dog a Bone: There's one sketch where he wasn't depicted as a manchild-ish hopeless moron, when it was found out his brain got stuck in his pilot helmet. When the Mr. Sylvesters put the brain back in his head, he became shockingly competent, which prompted them to take it off again.
Barack Obama
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based off the 44th U.S. President.
- Jive Turkey: He always talks in slang to sound hip and cool.
- Nice Guy: He's always affable and friendly.
- Only Sane Man: Was this at first. A good example was when Obama confessed that he found Sarkozy "bizarre", after the latter showed him his presidential plane in a customized version that screams Conspicuous Consumption.
- Our Presidents Are Different: Definitely "Personable". Had shades of "Puppet" too, much to his annoyance. And "Minority", of course.
- Top Ten List: Regularly made a show of presenting his "Top 5" or "Top 10" about various random subjects. This was inspired by the routine of comedian Thomas Ngijol, who became known on Canal+.
Donald Trump
A puppet based off the 45th U.S. President.
- Lower-Class Lout: One sketch called "Les Trumpche" was a parody of the French comedy film series Les Tuche about a lower class family that lacks manners and education, only with the Trump family. The only things they know about France? Berets, baguettes and "it's near Disneyland".
- Our Presidents Are Different: "Jerkass", "Evil", "Corrupt" and most definitely "Buffoon".
- Villainous Friendship:
- Some sketches had him hang out with Vladimir Putin and Bashar al-Assad. Including one that parodied The Hangover, set after a nuclear apocalypse with Kim Jong-un as the baby.
- He's also been invited for dinner by the far-right Le Pen family in France (Jean-Marie Le Pen, Marine Le Pen and Marion Maréchal) in the aformentioned "Les Trumpche" sketch.
USSR / Russia
Mikhail Gorbachev
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based off the final leader of the Soviet Union.
- Be Careful What You Wish For: In a 1991 sketch, he said he's sure USSR will last 3000 years.
- Old Shame: In a late 1990s sketch, he deeply regrets famously posing at a Pizza Hut when Russia entered a free market economy.
Vladimir Putin
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based off the President (one time Prime Minister) of the Russian Federation since 1999.
- Black Comedy: This particular bit about The Chechnya Wars:Putin: We find still standing building in Grozny and plant Russian flag.PPD: Where do you see "victory"?Putin: Finding still standing building in Grozny.
- Death Glare: Whenever he's asked a question that's too "sensitive" about democracy, corruption, invading other countries (Georgia in 2008, Ukraine's Crimea and Donbas in 2014) and the like by PPD, his usual response is simply a menacing stare at PPD, who then gets scared shitless and doesn't insist further.
- Hypnotic Eyes: Tried hypnotizing Angela Merkel, François Hollande and Barack Obama in order to have them see no problem with The New Russia and what he's done in Ukraine in 2014... then Hollande told him it doesn't work, but Western leaders are too cowardly to do anything against him anyway.
- President for Life: He doesn't see any issue with being reelected in office over and over again (or exchanging seats with Dmitry Medvedev when he can't be president), usually via some cheating at the elections that he always denies.
- The Voiceless: There were entire sketches where he would be interviewed by PPD and not say a word, staring menacingly at the latter instead.
- You No Take Candle: Usually speaks French this way, with few grammar, per the usual Husky Russkie stereotype.
Iraq
Saddam Hussein
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based off the President of Iraq from 1979 to 2003.
- Beleaguered Boss: He can't do much when American forces tear through his armies like a hot knife through butter during the 2003 invasion and appears jaded of the whole thing. His troops being "modernized" with only mopeds didn't help.
- Villainous Friendship: He's friends with Osama bin Laden and Mullah Omar in the show. He even attempted an escape from Baghdad with the both of them on their moped.
Qatar
Prince Tamim bin Hamad Al Thani & Leonardo
A puppet based off the Prince of Qatar (its Emir since 2013). He is always accompanied by his interpreter, Leonardo.
- Arab Oil Sheikh: Al Thani, though he bought the Paris Saint-Germain soccer club to diversify his assets.
- Character Catchphrase: Leonardo's "La Prince il parle, mais pas à toi." ("Da Prince can talk, but won't talk to you.") whenever he is asked if Al Thani can talk.
- Completely Unnecessary Translator: Leonardo is technically this, as Al Thani can speak French fluently, as seen in skits only featuring the two. It's just that the prince doesn't bother to talk to people beneath him.
- Conspicuous Consumption: Everything is cheap for Prince Al Thani. The one and only thing he's ever considered as costly? Convincing The Pope to pray Allah. In the middle of a public audience at Saint Peter's Square.
- The Voiceless: Al Thani usually thinks too highly of himself to talk to people, his interpreter does for him. Though in later years he talked normally to the soccer players on his payroll.
Musicians
Johnny Hallyday
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based on the famous singer.
- Addled Addict: He became addicted to Cuckoo Boxes, and so tried to suppress said addiction with paper clips. Then he became addicted to paper clips. Then he took a medication against paper clips... and became addicted to said medication, and ended up taking a medication against the medication against the addiction to paper clips. PPD took pity on him and brought a Cuckoo Box to have him come back to his first addiction.
- Cloudcuckoolander: He doesn't seem to be quite there, and in The '90s he even had a device that he had childish glee playing with (and even addiction) called "The Cuckoo Box", which consisted in an egg springing out of a box saying "CUCKOO!".
- Kitsch Collection: He has a whole collection of Cuckoo Boxes, with some being themed after The '60s, The '70s and The '80s and even some saying something else than "Cuckoo!".
- Verbal Tic: Always started his phrases with "Ah que...".
Michael Jackson
A puppet based on the King of Pop.
- Art Evolution: The puppets depicting him changed as his physical appearance changed with vitiligo and plastic surgery.
- Friend to All Children: Claims to love children, but the show made not-so-subtle hints at the infamous Real Life child sexual abuse allegations against Jackson.
- Manchild: He was portrayed with "Peter Pan syndrome".
- Winged Humanoid: He has angel wings with feathers in Heaven. They get replaced by Apple-made wings when Steve Jobs arrives there after his passing.
JoeyStarr
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based on French rapper JoeyStarr (real name Didier Morville), of Suprême NTM fame.
- The Ditz: Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
- Does Not Know His Own Strength
- No Indoor Voice: He always seems to be yelling angrily — even when perfectly calm. He also snores loud enough to wreck up his bedroom.
- Scary Black Man
- Those Two Guys:
- Verbal Tic: Like most rappers portrayed on the show, he ends every sentence with "Quoi !" ("What!" though in that case, it's closer to "Y'know!")
Sportspeople
Aimé Jacquet
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based on the trainer of the national French soccer team in The '90s, which won the FIFA World Cup in 1998.
- Brutal Honesty: When he sees soccer teams that suck, he won't sugarcoat how badly he thinks they suck.
- Driven to Madness: After his soccer trainer career ended, he found himself commenting matches of the (then-) epically boring French League 1 championship at Canal+. One day, he can't stand it anymore, snaps and takes his colleague hostage, threatening to shoot him if he doesn't get better competitions to comment.
- Irritation Is the Sincerest Form of Flattery: After the French team won the FIFA World Cup in 1998, PPDA started dressing as him and keep telling him he wants to be like him much to his irritation.
- Usurping Santa: Took the throne of God after doing the impossible, that is... having the French team win the FIFA World Cup for the first time in history.
Jacques Santini
A puppet based on former soccer player and short-lived trainer of the national French soccer team between 2002 and 2004.
- The Dreaded: PPD dreaded having to interview him considering how painfully slow he is and talks.
- Running Gag: For a time, when PPD would interview Fabien Barthez, Barthez would just bring Santini on set for shit and giggles, knowing Santini's extreme slowness will annoy PPD to no end.
- Speech Impediment: Speaks... very... very... very... slowly... So much so that Fabien Barthez made a game of trying to guess how to finish his phrases before he managed to finish them.
- The Unblinking: He never blinks.
- Wide Eyes and Shrunken Irises: His eyes are always open wide in a disturbingly empty stare.
Fabien Barthez
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based on the goalkeeper the national French soccer team from 1991 to 2006.
- Gallows Humor: No matter how bad the situation is, he'll always find a funny side to it.
- The Hyena: Would often laugh or snicker, usually because of the misfortunes of either the national French soccer team or French League 1 championship clubs.
- Stoners Are Funny: About half the time, he was seen heavily smoking something implied not to be mere tobacco.
Philippe Lucas
Voiced by: Nicolas Canteloup
A puppet based on the trainer of the French champion swimmer Laure Manaudou.
- The Alleged Expert: He's even asked about his opinion on sports that aren't swimming, and other subjects such as politics, fashion, or Reality TV.
- Breakout Character: The puppet became so popular that it was brought in sketches that had nothing to do with sports at all just to have the character comment on news.
- Brutal Honesty: When he thinks some sportspeople suck, he doesn't sugarcoat how he thinks they suck.
- Caustic Critic: He's asked to give his opinion on sports and makes brutally honest caustic remarks about it.
- Character Catchphrase: "Et pis c'est tout." ("And that's it" / "Period")
- Dumb Jock: Gives off this vibe sometimes with his muscles, shirts and not always very bright remarks.
- Sleeves Are for Wimps: He's never seen wearing anything with sleeves, to show off his muscles.
Zlatan Ibrahimović
A puppet based on the Swedish professional soccer player of Yugoslavian descent Zlatan Ibrahimović, who was once one of the crown jewels of the Paris Saint-Germain club.
- Mundane Utility: His legendary ball-kicking was used to deliver Christmas presents in chimneys around the world from the North Pole on Santa Claus' behalf at one point.
- Smurfing: He christened the verb "Zlataner" and uses it to mean various things, usually as a synonym of "kicking ass".
- Super-Strength: He's got enough strength in his foot to kick a ball across impossible distances.
Others
Mr. Sylvestre
Voiced by: Yves Lecoq
A puppet based off Sylvester Stallone, who had actually very little to do with the actor himself and was used to portray several characters, most prominently from the "World Company".
- The Ahnold: The puppet is based off Sylvester Stallone, and speaks with a gravel voice by Yves Lecoq that's meant to roughly imitate Stallone's French dub voice, Alain Dorval. More specifically it's based off John Rambo, who was a shorthand for American jingoism in France due to the Reagan era films Rambo: First Blood Part II and Rambo III.
- Anthropomorphic Personification: Not so much a single character as an embodiment of American jingoism during the early years of The War on Terror, then as one for One World Order through lies to the masses, terrorism as a political tool, unbridled capitalism, imperialism, opportunism in crisis times and whatnot.
- Brownface: The puppet was simply painted brown when it was used as Indian billionaire Lakshmi Mittal.
- Corrupt Corporate Executive: His most recurring role (usually in business or pharmaceutics), along with General Ripper and corrupted cardinals.
- Evil Laugh: He would often ending his sentences this way.
- Four Eyes, Zero Soul: The puppet is always used to portray despicable powerful people who run humanity into the ground for profit and are often seen wearing glasses.
- The Man Behind the Man:
- Whenever George W. Bush's puppet was interviewed in the show, his secretary (resembling Mr. Sylvestre, of course) talked for him (since he was a Manchild and The Ditz) and clearly implied to be the one who's truly in charge.
- To Barack Obama as well, much to his annoyance.
- Universal-Adaptor Cast: The puppet was used for several characters (aides to George W. Bush and Barack Obama, the World Company executives, a Vatican cardinal, Lakshmi Mittal, etc), all having For the Evulz in common.
Osama bin Laden
Voiced by: Daniel Herzog
A puppet based on the infamous Saudi Arabian terrorist leader from the early War on Terror.
- Affably Evil: He talks about killing people and spreading terror, but he's also quite a fun guy.
- Breakout Character: The puppet became quite popular and thus showed up in sketches that had nothing to do with terrorism/the War on Terror whatsoever.
- Catchphrase Insult: Often used "ispice di counasse" ("espèce de connasse" in French, roughly "you damn bitch" with a bad mock Arabic accent). He also tended to call his interlocutors "bourricot" ("donkey").
- Celebrities Hang Out in Heaven: He has showed up in (somehow) Heaven from time to time after the death of his Real Life counterpart in 2011. Without his promised "72 virgins" still.
- Flipping the Bird: Often addressed this to Americans.
- For the Evulz: He does all sorts of evil shit, because why not?
- Gratuitous Foreign Language: Often peppered his sentences with arab words such as "glaouis" (a slang for "testicles").
- The Hyena: He and Mullah Omar would often burst into laugh after a good statement.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: Sees nothing wrong with enforcing Stay in the Kitchen and stoning women per his extremist views of Islam.
- I Shall Taunt You: Likes to taunt the US military, US secret services and George W. Bush from the caves he's hiding in, usually via prank calls.
- Villainous Friendship: He is best buddies with the Afghan Mullah Mohammed Omar.
Steve Jobs
A puppet based on Steve Jobs, the inventor and businessman who founded Apple.
- Character Catchphrase: "Ceci est une révolution!" ("This is a revolution!"), whenever he introduces/advertises a new product of his.
- Celebrities Hang Out in Heaven: After his death, he equips everyone in Heaven with Apple-made angel wings, from Charles de Gaulle all the way to Michael Jackson.
- Honest John's Dealership: Everything he advertises as "I-something" in his business presentations will be guaranteed to sell, even a mere water bucket. He does so even in Heaven after his passing.
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: His Real Life successor Tim Cook was (inexplicably) depicted with the exact same puppet and voice as him, only with a bit more hair.
Karl Lagerfeld
A puppet based on famous German fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld.
- Character Catchphrase: "C'est de la merde." ("It's shit")
- Caustic Critic: Fashion is Serious Business for him and he won't ever sugarcoat his opinions whenever he finds some clothes and styles vulgar or out of touch.
- Cool Shades: Always wore sunglasses, just like the real one.
