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Characters / Sweet Jade and Hella John

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Character sheet for Sweet Jade and Hella John. Do note that this is largely incomplete.

WARNING: This contains massive spoilers. Even the names of the folders might imply spoilers of events until near the end of Act Two Act Two (which is practically near the end of the entire story anyway).

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    Main Heroes/Blue and Yellow Team, and Allies 

General Blue and Yellow Team Tropes

  • Mundane Utility: The epilogue reveals that Blue Demon Jade uses a water spawner as a simple method of having water to grow plants. The other alts use this too, with the counterparts more-or-less being "backup" for finishing Dave's comic after his death.
  • When All You Have Is a Hammer...: They all have some pretty mundane objects in their sylladexes, and following Intermission Act Three rarely if ever captchalogue anything, forcing them to rely on either their weapons, powers, or any environmental objects they find lying around.
  • You Gotta Have Blue Hair: The Harleys have very dark blue hair. It's the same color as Rip's. And of course, it turns out later on that Vampire Jade is Rip's ectomom.

Main Four

John Egbert/Mario Egbert/The Courage

The main protagonist, he is often quick to jump into new ideas. During the Mario Intermission, he has to rely on Jade to guide him through the game and explain some of the mechanics (barring the inward journey arc, where the kids' Gender Flip clones have to guide them all using their programed knowledge).

talks/types using his same quirk from homestuck, but with more outdated slang and swears, bitches!
switched to red text during the mario intermission. but other than that, everything stayed the same.
occasionally (and more often after the mario intermission) he starts talking like jade in runon sentences and with over punctuation!!!! and smilies!! :D

  • Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: Ho boy...
  • Berserk Button:
    • Do not kill off his favorite characters. At least when it comes to the comic-within-a-comic.
    • Despite hating his inner female self at first, he has a pretty negative reaction to attacking Dove. Mostly because he was led to believe that there was basically no other option for her other than becoming Deader Than Dead, but it turns out this isn't quite the case.
  • Can't Act Perverted Toward a Love Interest: Inverted. He doesn't seem to mind taking off his pants in front of Jade (his eventual girlfriend), though he does in front of a robot. He doesn't actually take off his pants, though, because of said robot being there.
  • Cargo Ship: Invoked. He briefly has a crush on the Ghostly Hologram Expositionary Scanner. This doesn't really go anywhere.
  • Fat and Skinny: Fat to Jade's skinny. Not only is he stated to be fat early on when trying to go down a chimney, but he gets even worse with this after goofing off while Jade, Jane, and Jake are fighting Dirk, Rose, and Roxy. The associated characteristics are inverted between them, though, such as him being the Straight Man compared to Jade.
  • Fetish: He likes giant red girls. This isn't revealed until near the end.
  • Good Is Dumb: He shows a few signs of this, namely with his general overreactions to certain events. Like when he got Pissed the Fuck Off. Or when he yelled "MICROSOFT!" to the skies of Heaven.
  • Groin Attack: Deals at least three out over the course of the adventure: Jane (by accident), Jean (by misunderstanding), and Dave (this one very much by intent). The latter of which (obviously spoilers) even gets a subtitle: COMBATT MOVE: DICK CRUSHER 2000!!!!!!!!!
  • Ho Yay: Invoked; he is stated outright (by something apparantly taken from his own subconcious; it can't get any more reliable than that) that he has a one-sided crush on Dave. That is, before Dave went crazy.
  • Hypocritical Humor: Sort of. In the epilogue, he mentions that he will be hard pressed to yell at Jade. Not a page, but a single line later he's declairing in all caps to Jade that she is a wonderful person, which comes very close to yelling at her, even if it's praise.
  • I Hate Past Me: Early into Intermission Act Three, Jane starts a memo where, among others, John and both — from the same point of time — of his copies join in. Later on, his future self shortly after the Mario session ends joins in and then proceeds to outright troll his past self and both of their counterparts until Jade (from the same point in the future) comes in and bans him.
  • Madness Mantra: "aw hell naw" when he sees Jean.
  • Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy: He's isn't completely feminine over the course of the story by himself, but compared to the other characters he fits the bit. Especially Jade, his corresponding masculine girl.
  • Ship Tease: He's teased with everyone. Covering just the humans: Jade and Dave all the time (in the latter's case, only before he turned evil), he is infatuated with Rose to the point that she makes him faint, even Jane gets a little nod when she almost kisses him in their sleep, Jake's female counterpart confesses to him here, and towards the end of the story (though the pairing itself has long been sunk for a number of reasons) he finds Roxy's Pissed the Fuck Off red giant form to be very attractive. So that only leaves Dirk. Another thing of note is that Pikmin Fan pointed out that both he and Jane have had some kind of romantic involvement with green-texted people of the opposite sex. In Jane's case, she's happily dating Jake. In John's, there's the teases with Jade before they finally hookup at the end, the period of time he was dating Nepeta, a short thing with Kanaya, and his quick crush on Dove.
  • Took a Level in Dumbass: He's a huge idiot compared to his canonical self.
  • Totally Radical.

Jade Harley/Luigi Harley/The Badass Lesbian

One of the most... vocal characters in the comic, Jade is John's close friend (and no, they are not related in this alternate universe) and often the one who influences many other characters.

talks/types using her same quirk from homestuck but uses more slang and swears like john!!!
only a LOT more swears than john!!!!! >:D
switched to lime green text during the mario intermission (but thats not that much different from her old color just motherfucking harder to read!)
for the second half of intermission act one and early into intermission act two she talked in a darker green because yoshi was the one who got the light green color... but they switched colors early into ia2
sometines, but more often after the mario intermission, she starts to use commas and periods once in a while. and overall types like john sometimes. she does this moreso when shes doubting her actions near the end of act two act two.

  • The Ace: In the Mario game. She's able to burn through the first six worlds in a matter of only minuites, which while the levels themselves are pretty easy, it's still an impressive feat.
  • Anti-Hero/Nominal Hero: She holds an incredible dislike to Dave, lacks empathy even from what John feels as shown near the end, is implied to hate doing work, tries to kill Karkat over a mistake, and is pretty much the cause of most of the story's problems. But she still fights along with the rest of the Team, contributes to killing the villains, and manages to be one of the six surviving non-alternate-self characters.
  • Berserk Button: Mentioning of Karkat during a large period of time in between mid-IA2 (when Karkat accidentally sent her to 1-1) and very close to the end of IA3 (when they sort of made up). They're still pissed off at eachother, although it's because of how Karkat won't forgive Jade for being so angry over the pipe incident. Jade completely forgives him for his words being what caused her to finally have a (seemingly, their actual relationship wasn't really explored) stable relationship.
  • Celebrity Crush/Perverse Sexual Lust: She likes Marge Simpson. To the point where she thinks Rip's action of killing a faux-Marge made her worthy of being the Final Boss of the adventure and discounted everything Dave did.
  • Cerebus Retcon: Her thing for Marge Simpson takes on a slightly darker edge once her parents' backstory is revealed. Although Marge Simpson and the Sleepy Dogwoman aren't exactly similar at all, possibly denying anything Freudian about it.
  • Dope Slap: She slaps John after he trolls his past selves.
  • Double Standard: In-universe. She, at one point, makes the claim that she can get away with some of the comments she makes due to being a girl. She makes a few tests about this with Jude after the intermission. With the author of this being GPF, needless to say Jade's theories weren't entirely correct.
  • Everyone Has Standards:
    • Dislikes John trolling his past self.
    • In spite of joking about her, Jade legitimately hates Sleepy Dogwoman and instantly gets agressive when she appears.
  • Fat and Skinny: She is confirmed to be the tallest of the Blue and Yellow Team (not counting duplicates for obvious reasons), and fits this physical dynamic with John, given how it's been implied that she's slender, but the associated characteristics are inverted.
  • Fetish: For yellow women.
  • Flanderization: Her pervertedness (which was not a thing in Homestuck) was magnified a bit during early Intermission Act 3. Contrast to IA2, where a misunderstanding results in her posting a large "O_O" emotcon.
  • Grossup Closeup: Her first actual appearance in the epilogue is the closest thing the adventure has to one. Basically she was just woken up, one eye half open, cheetos scattered everywhere (including one in her hair), a small puddle of drool formed on the bed, and she's wearing an undershirt and boxers that show that she has really hairy legs, arms, and armpits.
  • Heroic BSoD: Here, after finding out Rip's full power. John quickly snaps her out of it though.
  • Karma Houdini: Characters in-comic have speculated that she might be the cause of most of the story's problems. They aren't pulling guesses out of thin air: She's implied to have helped driven Dave to over break himself, which led to his insanity later. That aside and going by a chain of events (though Dave's insanity did lead to all of Texas being blown up), before that he made the Mario session, which the Millennium hijacked and added the equipment for making Lord Major Quimby, who was born with the time-traveling sash that Rip would steal, and then the two of them would start the history of vampires. And he made Prospit, which led to Tyrian Nepeta making Derse, which led to Jack biting Jade (going back to Dave, Jack was fueled by Dave and Rose's hatred towards her), which led to Vampire Jade being the ectobiological mother to the comic's main antagonist. All of this, and she's one of the few characters not to die and even gets off with a comparatively normal life and a boyfriend.
  • The Lad-ette: She refuses to shave (claiming that it's "participating in gender equality" and that Kanaya would be proud if she was still alive), is one of the most emotionally blocked characters in the entire comic, is very fond of crude humor, and is often one of the first characters to object or otherwise comment rudely to others. She and Jake are also two of the only characters who have a Porn Stash and are very open about it.
  • Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy: Masculine girl to John's feminine boy. And to Dave's feminine boy to a lesser extent, seeing how Dave is outright stated to look like a girl.
  • One of the Boys: She seems to be one of John's very few actual friends (though you'll have to toy around with that definition seeing as she actually once considered punching him while he was greiving over Dave's death) since he didn't even know Dirk, barely interacts with Rose or Roxy, Dave goes crazy — along with Rose, Roxy, and Dirk, and Jane and Jake are more like members of his team than friends. While her "being one of them" only brings this up to two, she's definitely this to John.
  • Lady Swears a Lot.
  • Totally Radical: Worse than John. She often raps about random stuff. Given how she was raised by a half-Strider, this is almost garunteed.
  • Troll: She's an ass. Notable actions include confessing to Kanaya, then after nearly every troll in the comic reacts, admitting that it was a lie. Also in a flashback she is shown to have writen a forum adventure called "Marge Simpson's Choise Ass," which was implied to have been locked by Dave himself.
  • Women Are Wiser: Averted. While she isn't implied to be dumb like Jake is or weird like John is, she's basically a cross between an average sit com dad, a poser teenager, and a For the Evulz prankster.

Jane Egbert/Wario Egbert/The Girl Who Does Nothing But Baking

John's "evil" twin sister and arguably one of the most powerful members of the Blue and Yellow Team.

Types using her same style from canon.
Switched to yellow text in the Mario Intermission (with a black background in the original IA4 and, later on, after the clairity retcon).
  • BFS: Wields one, the Crocker Blade.
  • Enemy Mine: A playful example, she and Jake were rivals to John and Jade and were in fact two of the most active antagonists to them at the time, however things get real and the Millennium are revealed to them to be evil, so they side with their siblings.
  • Women Are Wiser: Herself as an individual is sometimes regarded as being "higher" than John and Jake in maturity. Jade, on the other hand, is at the exact opposite of the spectrum from her. Most conversations between the two result in Jane getting annoyed by whatever Jade says.

Jake Harley/Γuigi (Waluigi) Harley/The Fan Service

Types in the same manner as canon!
Switched to purple text in the mario intermission.

  • Abhorrent Admirer: He becomes this to Jade, with his ever-lasting crush to her. It is confirmed in the final page that he still isn't over wanting to make out with his sister. But to be fair Jade was hitting on his counterpart and, to a lesser extent, Jake himself, so... Laser-Guided Karma?
  • Enemy Mine: See the entry of this trope under Jane.
  • Good Is Dumb: Worse than John in this regard.
  • The Load: Aside from shooting up Walter, he rarely does anything helpful to the plot. He's not exactly harmful to the gang's progress, but he doesn't really contribute much of importance either.
  • Stealth Pun: Using the Greek letter Gamma to stand for Waluigi, given how it looks like an inverted L and that is Waluigi's symbol.

Inward Journey Counterparts

Universal Tropes

  • Angst? What Angst?: Joan's the only one who actually freaks out over his new body, but then Jude quickly convinces him that it's not so bad. Given the nature of this comic, this is likely invoked.
  • Deconstructive Parody: Of Problem Sleuth's Spirit Quest and subsequent events surrounding HD and NB.
  • Exposition Fairy: In regards to the inward journey. They have pre-added knowledge of the layouts of the rooms as well as the basement, two side openings, and the back hallway. Jean acts as this arguably moreso than the rest, even expositing with John (and Jade) in a similar manner than Nannasprite did with him in Homestuck.
  • Gender Flip: Thanks to Lazy Artist and them feeling more comfortable with their old fashion, though, they still all dress like their originals do.
  • Mind Screw: Their lock rooms being locked from within behind their original self's rooms is supposed to represent... something. Whether it's each of them imagining themselves in the opposite sex or getting into a relationship with them isn't really clear. But this gets weirder when you take into consideration the hallways connecting all four sets of rooms, behind even the counterparts' rooms. Pikmin Fan himself has not decided what this means.
  • Rule of Three: The Running Gag of the counterparts being sad about something trivial over their new bodies (Jean's Gag Boobs, Jude's being unable to get away with making dirty jokes thanks to a Double Standard he percieved, and Joan's hair) is played straight for the first three counterparts created, with Joan (the third one) having the addition of freaking out over it. By the time it happens with Jaka, the sequence (including Jake's consumption of the gatorade) is written with a bunch of BLAH BLAH BLAHs until the "You are sad because..." part, which cuts itself off because Jaka finally breaks the trend by being happy about her new self. (Though it starts out with "Because your name is fucking stupi—")
  • Running Gag: Each of their introductions have a page where the caption consists entirly of "Your name is X," with the next page showing the person frowning with "You are sad because..." being what's at the beginning of the caption. Jaka is the one exception, since her Mario character is now in blue, she's finally a blue lady she likes so much.
  • Screw Yourself: Averted at first. Gender intrests remaining the same aside, John and Jake both have issues with their counterparts (they begin kicking them in the groin as soon as they see them), although that was due to dreams involving "inner female selves" that highly resemble them prior to the journey. Jade and Jude, Jade's counterpart, argue about certain double standards. Jane is the only one who immediatley gets along with her counterpart, which everyone takes note of. Later played straight when Joan and Jane are revealed to have started dating, and Jake and Jaka do too.
  • Wholesome Crossdresser: They dress exactly like their original selves, given that unlike the Problem Sleuth counterparts, they have all the memories of the kids' lives given to them once they were made, so to some extent they were them. It's complicated. Notably in the epilogue, while Joan is still shown in a dress, Jane has switched to pants and puts on a mustache. It seems no matter which gender Jane is, she likes dressing as the other gender.

Jean Egbert/Maria Egbert/The Wisdom

John's counterpart created in the inward journey and the first copy to be made. (Even though John and her entered their inward journey rooms at nearly the same time, Jade refused to drink her quest gatorade due to not liking the drink. So her counterpart was not made until Jean told her about how it was borderline necessary.) Due to a certain dream prior to John's inward journey, they don't start off getting along.

types with john's quirk, because, you know, they were the same person for almost thirteen years.note 
switched to light red text during the mario intermission.

Jude Harley/Lugia Harley/The Badass Crossdresser

talks/types with jades quirk only with a little more depression
talks/types like john a little more often than jade.
switched to jade text during the mario intermission

  • Only Sane Man: The most rational of all Jades, even though he's not technically considered a Jade.
  • Stealth Pun: His text/speech color, both before and after the Mario Intermission. It's more jade colored than Jade's color.
  • Women Are Wiser: Inverted. He's a male clone of Jade, yet shows more maturity than her. Although this was because Jade was the first to speak out about the cloning when the two meet, and Jude basically quickly got irritated by the sound of his own/his sister's voice.

Joan Egbert/Waria Egbert/The Male PMSer

Types/talks like Jane but he's kind of prone to FREAKOUTS SOMETIMES!!!!
Switched to dark chartreuse text during the Mario Intermission. (Or, as Jake calls it, "yucky olive.")

  • Mood-Swinger: Acts a lot more irrational than Jane and gets angry/adgitated very often. Could be either a fault in the quest gatorade Jane drank, or that he really hasn't gotten over being a man at all.
  • Wholesome Crossdresser: Stays in skirts for the whole adventure. In the episode, Jane has revealed to be dressing up in pants and having grown a mustache. No matter what gender, Jane/Joan wants to be like the other.

Jaka Harley/Γugia (Walugia) Harley/The Fan Service But With a Vagina Instead of a Penis

Types like jake but (mostly after the mario intermssion) with a little more of an upbeat adittude and oftentimes with smilies! :) Because shes glad that shes a... "blue" woman at least during that moment when playing the game.
Switched to blue text during the mario intermission.
Types in red and with more proper grammar early on in Act Two Act Two! Forgets that upon getting amnesia from Roxy but remembers shortly after, then drops the style prior to John's battle with Dave. Overall sounds more like Hank Hill during this part.

  • Generation Xerox: Even though they're not related, she takes after Hank Hill in being the one to finish off Rip. She even considers herself to be like the daughter Hank never had, while also getting her own identity (which is partially what the color-swap part of her myth was about).
  • Red Herring: She's not going to grow up to get a sex change, hair and skin re-dye, and become Hank Hill.

Other Alter Egoes

FIRE John Egbert/FIRE Mario Egbert/The Fire Guy

Originally started as a copy of John created from a misunderstanding regarding extra lifes. Shortly after his creation, he ate a fire flower, making it easy to tell him apart with the normal John.

It turns out that his newly gained fire powers really made him feel more strong. He becomes a more confident character than the original John, all the while trying his best not to lose his fire powers.

talks/types with john's quirk. he starts out with bracketed white text, to match the color of his new shirt, but then he switches to a bright orange after rip asks him do to so.
after the mario intermission, he keeps this style but uses more FIRE puns and capitalizes the word FIRE.
acts more imposing in general.
but still has a soft side! kind of...

ICE Jade Harley/ICE Luigi Harley/The Ice Girl

Vampire Jade Harley/The Bloodsucker

The first alter ego made after the Mario session.

  • Can't Act Perverted Toward a Love Interest: In the epilogue, she gets incredibly flustered when John asks if vampires can drink semen. Word of God hints that it's not that trope so much that it is a subject none of the Jades can handle without getting embarassed, but the keys otherwise are still there.
  • Red Herring: No, she's not going to be Rip Van Winkle. She will become her ectomom, however.
  • Ship Teasing: Oddly for an alter ego, she's arguably teased with John in heavier ways than Jade is. Examples include her love especially for his exact kind of blood (even licking his nose when it starts bleeding courtesy of Fire John), and in the epilogue where John asks her out of curiosity if vampires can drink semen. Maybe this is due to the fact that, unlike John and Jade as far as we know, this Jade has an actual child with him, if in the form of an ectobiological sociopath that's at least nine nundred and eighty-seven years older than them.
  • Up to Eleven: Much hasn't been elaborated on her, but she apparantly has Jade's (Sweet Jade and Hella John's Jade, not Homestuck's) personality except turned up.

Zombie Jade Harley/The Milksucker

  • Continuity Nod: She's gray, just like Zombie Ace Dick.
  • Not Using the "Z" Word: Actually inverted: If this follows Hellsing rules, then she should technically be considered a ghoul. However, she isn't likely because Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals also refered to ghouls as zombies.
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: It's debatable if she's really that or just flat out stupid with some short bursts of knowledge.
  • Our Zombies/Ghouls are Different: In short, they're like vampires but inferior in almost any way. They also prefer milk to blood.

Trickster John Egbert/The Moron

Trickster Jade Harley/The Suga Fuga

Blue Demon Jade Harley/The Object of Jake's Desires

John's Inner Female Self/Jenn Egbert/The Mentalist

  • Chekhov's Gunwoman: Her first two appearances seem to be extremely minor self-cest jokes. But on her third.... It begins with her being someone for John to vent to, during a rather complicated instance of Journey to the Center of the Mind after everyone else left him alone. Then Roxy comes in and knocks both of them out. Then, later, she's revealed to have sprited both the dream John "avatar" that he used, as well as Jenn who was a dream construct and not... well, an avatar like he was. Both of the sprites die as part of a plan, and while Johnsprite goes on to become Trickster John, Jenn stays in the afterlife until Act 2 Intermission 2, where she tags along with Tavros and later goes with Jake to Heaven to fight Rip. And during said showdown once Act 3 begins, she sneaks into Rip and convinces Jade to give her final life to her, thus becoming a living, non-sprite, individual being. This probably makes Sweet Jade and Hella John one of the few fan works where Screw Yourself jokes are really part of a character's lengthy plan to something more.
  • The Chessmaster: Her plan for breaking off into her own, genuine self and coming to life is revealed to pretty much span from late Intermission Act Two all the way to mid Act Three; it is by far the longest arc in the series and contributes a lot to the plot, which is amazing seeing as how making Dove into her own person was nigh-instantanious.
    step one: the next time he goes to sleep, introduce self to john in an extremely flirty matter, constantly wanting to makeout with him whenever he dreams.
    step two: steer john towards not dating rose, but rather someone closer to him. bring up rose's statements in conjunction with disturbing behavior. this will make him doubt in her. but that's a good thing: we have secretly known rose was evil, but of course john would be in denial about it until something extreme happens. whoever he starts leaning towards dating, this will infuriate roxy.
    step three: mentally contact roxy on the night after this mario session. john would have likley told dave or rose about his situation, and they would have told roxy about it, so roxy would know that i could be seen as traiterous. regardless of roxy's specific degree of insanity, she should want to enter our dreams and see our personal weaknesses.
    step four: show true colors to john. make him trust you a little more, but not entirley.
    step five: knowing dave's ego, capabilities, and how the overhead view of world 4 plus jade's descrptions match those of skaia, complete with that 3x3 chess set at the core, creating sprites is inevidable. convince roxy, within this same dream, to prototype both john's dreamself and i each into a seperate kernel.
    step six: fight an overly powerful villain with johnsprite, all the while convincing him that he can win in this fight. if we win, go after another villain, and repeat until we are killed.
    step seven: spriting will give life to things, meaning that they will have a legitamate soul this time. i should finally have a free ghost, without any possible characteristics of if my sprite was prototyped with something else before. john's dreamself will also have a seperate life.
    step eight: wait for an oppertunity to exit the afterlife to come up. in my brief time being there, i saw an exit door, meaning that it was possible. it may be a challenge, however.
    step nine: don't just drift to a one-up and come back along with john; remember, seperate life may be extremely close, but reaching it that way will make you look too desperate and manipulative. ironically, the way to properly achive this without seeming too suspicious is through real manipulation. find someone who has at least three lives, go to them as ghosts, and ask if they could bring us life.
    step ten: it's not over yet! in fact, this is the hardest step! take down a villain after being brought to life to secure trust.
    step eleven: you've been through john and jade's other adventures! they always do a party afterwards, and hold an eene: tme tournament. hold up a missile toe atop the stairs linking our house just when the party is about to end!
    step twelve: make john and someone else realize they are standing under it when that someone leaves. the someone would be an ideal partner for him.
    step thirteen: tell him that i was right about leaning him towards a partner.
    step fourteen: hope he gives thanks, forgives my previous behavoir, and officially counts me as part of the egbert family.
  • Color-Coded Characters: Shifts her text color from yellow to pink after she sees John again after he meets Jean.
  • Continuity Nod: Her text color is Roxy's canon color, while Roxy uses Jaspersprite's color. If the opening author's notes are any indication, the latter was because SJAHJ was writen before the author found a good list of colors that has Roxy's actual color, and had to use Jaspersprite's instead. This is lampshaded when she switches:
    John: NOBODY has that ff6ff2 asw tect color!
  • Foreshadowing: Notice how her eye is open here and here. She faked being asleep at some point. Hints that she knows more than she lets on.
  • Odd Name Out: It's implied that while there are hundreds of Johns, Jades, Janes, Jakes, and even Jeans, Judes, Joans, and Jakas thanks to Trickter John, there is only one Jenn.
  • Off-Model: Fan would occasionally forget a color of a stripe in her dress. Probably the most obvious is one of the final panels, where it skips from cyan to violet and completely lacks an azure or pure blue stripe.
  • Retcon: It's been said previously by Dave that sprited dreamselves still work like dreamselves when the sprite dies. This is simply proven to be a false theory of his.
  • Screw Yourself: She appears to have an affection for John. Nope, it's just a decoy.
  • Shadow Archetype: Probably to John, what with being a part of his mind or something. She also appears to know everything about every way his thoughts work, much to his annoyance.
  • Troll: She trolls John all the time. She also seems to like messing with (Vampire) Rose. (Link contains major spoilers.)

The Other Alts, General Alter-Ego Tropes

There were originally 600 of them, but it's stated that in the epilogue Trickster John only increased that number.

  • Amazing Technicolor Population: Either this or they're all colorful monsters like Blue Demon Jade is. There's no reason why it can't be both.
  • The Bus Came Back: Earlier on, four alts express distress over being insulted. Instead of dialogue, however, they use emotes. They later appear with a few lines each in the epilogue, finally getting a bit of dialogue and even having unique typing styles.
  • Chekhov's Gunman:
    • The idea of a shitload of at least Jades was foreshadowed way back in Intermission Act Two, complete with them becoming colorful a page later. This was back when Fire John was the only alter ego; shortly before Jenn was even hinted at.
    • Red Demon Jade appearing in person while Robosanta and Ice King are freezing stuff up. She appears again to "narrate" a recap to the readers regarding where everyone is, and specifically counting alternate selves.
  • Cute Monster Girl/Guy: They all seem to be somewhat harmless, and very humanoid in appearance.
  • Dark Is Not Evil: Occasionally there are some alts who seem to be color-inverted versions of their main selves (or at least how they're depicted when not "in-color") with black skin and white hair/outlines. But like all alter egoes, they seem to work with the Blue and Yellow Team.
  • Literal Split Personality.
  • Other Me Annoys Me: Not often discussed, but it happens. Jade in particular seems to loathe all of her duplicates to an extent.
  • Our Monsters Are Different: The majority of them seem to be some kind of alien species.
  • Palette Swap: Some of the background egos. The foreground egos are more like outfit swaps, or just swap the palettes of outfits.
  • Real After All: The Red Demon Jade and Purple Demon Jade were said by John as being a part of the flashback dream as not actually being there, but it turns out that at least there is a Red Demon Jade, and she is part of the Team. How John dreamed them up where it would be fitting for demons to be there in spite of never actually seeing Red Demon Jade and Purple Demon Jade at the time is never adressed, though since the workers seem to be demons it can be inferred that he simply saw them and mentally slapped their features onto Jade. The fact that those Jades are wearing Mario outfits while their real selves do not support this.
  • Which Me? Characters often call their alternate selves "fire me," "vampire me," etc. Some of the background alts get really ridiculous in this regard, to the point where there's at least one that Jane's not even sure what characteristics she has.
  • Zerg Rush: They're not very strong characters compared to the rest of the cast, but they soon become numerous. Simply being in large numbers (specifically, being spawned) is how they even break out of the Rock Statue Thing's prison.

Misc. Allies

Davosesprite-Rose/"Sane" Rose

Davosesprite-Dave/"Sane" Dave

  • The Ace: His role in the Intermission.

Dave's Inner Female Self/Dove Strider

types in the same manner as dave only with even less emotion and with more frequent periods.
practically uses periods in place of any other form of punctuation. including commas.
originally her dialogue was writen as daves just with slightly more emotion and question marks
this happened in her proper appearance but in a few updates her typing style was quickly changed to the above mid-conversation

  • Deader Than Dead: She is unique in being the only character that risks becoming this should Dave force her out of existance (Rip's use of the Hat Goddess to blast the ghosts away was more of a plot device and an excuse to not have the ghosts fight her), as she is merely a personality/dreamself that is a part of Dave and not an actual, individual person. She ends up getting a real "soul" in Davosesprite's self, but aside from that it seemed as though herself was nearly completely wiped out. Especially after Vampire Dave scares her out of the dream, merging her back with a Dave that would refuse to accept her personality. Summarized here:
    Dove: but... i guess after being vampirized...
    Dove: i completely vanished from his [Dave's] mind. couldnt think within himself anymore.
    John: so umm....
    John: your concious in hell?
    Dove: no. its not like that.
    Dove: since im not tecnically my own living being right now.
    Dove: before being vampirized dave created that inward journey part of the mario session in an attempt to isolate inner selves out of the body in order to separate from them.
    Dove: but basing off of records of the dream conversation he got from jade about your dream conversation with your ifs this didnt work.
    Dove: anyway i can keep "living" from dream dave clones created before the vampirism.
    Dove: like the four that were taking notes of the writtings on everyones walls.
    Dove: i took control of all of them and got them to enter your dreams. then i merged them into myself.
    Dove: but. the number of pre-vampirism dream daves is depleting.
    Dove: thats what i meant when i said i was going to die soon.
    John: n.... nn-n no!
    John: what if you die and then get sent to afterlife???? will that be a save??
    Dove: no. i will still be counted as a dreamself. and will fade permenantly.
    John: how many's left?
    Dove: counting davosesprite?
    Dove: around five.
  • Expy: Of Calliope, being a green-themed Ms. exposition at great risk of being tragically killed/"absorbed" by her other self. She even has the half-shape theme while her alternate has a full-shape theme which was a half-.
  • Ms Exposition: Her first conversation with John is an incredibly lengthy backstory (by SJAHJ's standards) of the Millennium. And then after taking John into Kanaya's dreams, she talks about how she managed to become a "half" to Dave before he started trying to not only force her back, but wipe that part of her from his mind.
  • Literal Split Personality: They literally split after Davosesprite explodes. If Rose had an inner self is not mentioned.
  • The Stoic: Even moreso than Dave. She also doesn't care that her entire existance is tied to a decreasing number of pre-vampirism Dave's dreamselves now that Dave's real self's vampirism somehow prevented her from forming at all in him, and openly admits that she's going to die soon. She does, but it's the "standard" death instead of having the "her" aspects of Dave's personality erased.
  • Token Good Teammate: Literally the only canon-Derse-dreamer who is consistently good throughout the entire story.

The Ghostly Hologram Expositionary Scanner

Alchemized from a captcha of (ghost) Jenn, a photograph of Aranea, and a computer, GHES is a program installed into a single monocle-like device that projects a hologram looking like Aranea but without all the crazy to elaborate.

  • Exposition Fairy: Alchemized to be this.
  • Killed Off for Real: Rip steps on her, splitting her in half.
  • Suspiciously Similar Substitute: To Aranea, the actual Aranea turning evil probably has something to do with that.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: She probably has more character development from one conversation (though it's the only conversation with actual character development) than most of the major characters had over the course of the entire adventure, and yet she's killed off right away. We don't even see her ghost.

    Rivals/Red and Red Team 

Dave Strider/Vampire Dave Strider/(Green) Link Strider
Dave, after turning into an emo.note 

The elected "leader" of the Team and John's designated rival.

As unlike the Blue and Yellow Team, the transformed version of Dave is very clearly the "main" self (the B&YT duplicates either being ambiguous or not the "Alpha" selves), yet his self after Davosesprite's separation and the creation of a new "normal" Dave is more like how he was in the intermission, this covers both general tropes on Dave and tropes specifically to himself post-vampirism. Which is convenient, since his transformation into a vampire is roughly around the point in the story where he snaps. Tropes specific to Dave as a mortal will go under "Davosesprite-Dave," in the Blue and Yellow Team folder. Information on Dove also goes there.

types with his same style from canon
switches to the same shade of red used for the time aspect from homestuck after becoming a vampire
and very briefly to green when as link

  • Anti-Climax Boss: Played for laughs. After several pages of hype about his abilities and how strong he is and how the Mangekyo Upgrade made him into an unbeatable boss, his fight agains John lasts less than twenty static pages as his insanity has also made him gullable enough to fall for an obvious back-stabbing when John proposes to work with Dave only to get Jade to shoot him in the head.invoked
  • Axe-Crazy: Post-breakdown.
  • Big Bad: Of Act 2.
  • Big Ol' Eyebrows: As with his canon incarnation, except possibly toned up from even that. Look at the image for him. That's one of the smaller drawings of his eyebrows.
  • Cosplay: Does this a lot.
  • Dude Looks Like a Lady: When on the Nepetabase island, Karkat confuses him for a girl.
  • Emo Teen: Shortly post breakdown, he attempted this style.
  • Expy: During Act 2, he becomes this to Caliborn. Except unlike Caliborn, most of his actions after becoming finalized as a villain have direct impacts on the heroes instead of being a part of a slowly developing plan.
  • Evil Costume Switch: First he starts dressing like Andrew Hussie's insert in his first appearance (Word of God says that Dave was never intended to be a jab at Hussie), then he becomes "emo" resulting in the above... thing.
  • Eye Scream: After getting the Mangekyo Sharingan, he starts bleeding from his eyes.
  • Jumping Off the Slippery Slope: So Kanaya noticed that Dave has some hidden issues with Jade. Rather than talking that he himself is over them or continue blaming them on Jack, he (or at least Davosesprite) advices Rose to kill her.
  • Leaning on the Fourth Wall: He leads the Blue and Yellow Team (specifically John) through a series of curtains linking from Slender Forest to the Valley of the End. Except the coloring of the curtains represents the subacts: a blue curtain for Act 1 on a white floor; three red curtains for IA1, IA2, and II1, half-red-half-pink curtains for IA3, IA4, and II2, all six of the intermission curtains being over ground that changes to set and match the eight biomes of the Mario session; a half-blue-half-yellow curtain over a lush green field representing A2A1 and how lighter it is compared to the future of the story; a cerulean curtain over dying lands to represent A2I1 and how it's changing quickly; another half-blue-half-yellow curtain over dead lands to show that the story's not during back and representing A2A2; a quarter-red, purple, gray, and dark gray curtain representing A2I2 and where it initially takes place; a last blue/yellow curtain just before VotE to represent A2A3 and how it's the battle between Dave himself and John at that location, showing how it would be one of the most difficult trials so far. Behind Dave's side of the valley (yes, into Mexico) is a gold curtain representing Act 3, and shortly behind that is a rainbow circle with a magenta transportalizer (leading to Springfield) in the middle, representing the Epilogue. Beyond that, as revealed in Act 3 when the B&YT scramble to get over there, is a large, silver statue of a combination of the "male" and "female" astrological symbols, representing the Early-Bird Cameo of the Swyyx Project on the last frame of the comic's bonus gif at the end.
  • Old Shame: His Let's Play of The Simpsons: Hit & Run in-universe.
  • Other Me Annoys Me: Played for "drama" with Dove. As he tries to force her out of existance. John objects strongly to this idea, in spite of hating his own inner female self.
  • Peek-a-Bangs: His final design has his left eye covered by a part of his hair.
  • Ron the Death Eater: Even near the beginning, he's constantly implicitley insulting people and acting like he's above everyone due to his powers. Invoked in hindsight though, as this led to his rise in villainy.
  • Used to Be a Sweet Kid: Averted. He was something of a jackass before his breakdown. Unlike pretty much everything else different about his character from canon, this one doesn't really have an excuse.
  • Unwanted Harem: Just about everybody in his age group, regardless of what is said about their sexuality, has some bizarre love confession to him at some point during one-on-one conversations.
    TG: everyone loves dave
    TG: everyone
  • Walking Spoiler.
  • With Great Power Comes Great Insanity: Inverted. He used his advanced dream powers to delay becoming insane from Silencer's induced nightmares. Though this fails.
  • You Don't Look Like You: Look at the image, of him after his costume switch. With the lack of shades, slightly different hair style near his forehead, and different shirt, it's hard to think that that's actually Dave.
  • Your Head Asplode: He finally dies this way, getting his head blown up by Jade.
    Jade (At the EOA2 curtains page): heh. i guess you could say dave lost his head... and then he lost his head!!! ....what? nobody? aw shit i think i offended someone

Rose Lalonde/Vampire Rose Lalonde/(Red) Link Lalonde

Jane's designated rival.

As with Dave due to being in the same situation, this covers tropes about Rose in general and after she becomes a vampire. Also convenient, this was very shortly after her slippery slope jump. Tropes on Rose that specifically applied to her as a non-vampire are listed under "Davosesprite-Rose," under the Blue and Yellow Team folder.

Types with her same style from canon, switches to the same color used for the Light aspect after becoming a vampire.
Briefly typed/talked in maroon after becoming Red Link.

  • Dark-Skinned Blonde
  • The Dragon: To Dave, at least intelectually. Physically Roxy fits this more, being way more active than Rose is.
  • Literal Split Personality: Thanks to Davosesprite's separation and exploding, there is still a "normal" Rose and Dave while there's also their vampiric selves. They don't actually really meet (though Vampire Dave does have objections from his alternate selves pre-breakdown) until Rose and Vampire Rose do in Act 2 Intermission 2 and much later when Vampire Dave and Dave do in Act 3, yet up until then Vampire Dave and Rose were just treated as "upgrades," contrast to the alternates of the Blue and Yellow Team whom were treated like seperate entities.
  • Scars Are Forever: She retains her injuries and dress rip from the dog-mauling incident before finally healing it up with her vampire powers the next day after aquiring said powers.

Roxy Lalonde/(Purple) Link Lalonde

Jake's designated rival.

types and taolks with her same style from canon but in jaspersprites text color
* talks
switched to purple when purple link ad also LIKES TO SCREW AROUNDDD SOMETIMES AND IMITATE CANON VILLAINS
* and *AROUND

  • Ax-Crazy: Even moreso than the rest of the Red and Red Team. She imitates villains for the hell of it, her first reaction when meeting a mysterious Trickster Jade is to shoot her, she has less motivation than Dave and Rose to turn evil (and could in fact use that very same motivation for good; shipping obsession aside that would actually be somewhat in-character for her), and overall she's sometimes even drawn to look insane. Such as this panel.
  • Nightmare Face: Again, this page. Well, as close as it can while retaining the comic's usual MS Paint scrap style.
  • Off-Model: Occasionally loses the scars from the dog attack. Massive spoilers in the link!
  • Scars Are Forever: Her injuries from the dog-mauling incident last until her death.
  • Yandere: She's like this, but with other relationships (she's amusingly far more willing to give into Dirk not retaining her feelings than she is anything that goes against John/Rose and Dave/Jade, and she never has to worry about Jane and Jake falling for others). Her entire motivation for joining the Red and Red Team is to put an end to John and Jade's flirting with anyone other than Rose or Dave respectively, which in turn leads to things like her starting the apocalyptic event in Springfield (the Curse Women being let loose) and being a rather aggressive player as the R&RT as a whole. It's even implied that she doesn't actually side with anything Dave and Rose do, she's just with them because she think that siding with them would be a better option than siding with the then-seemingly-weaker Blue and Yellow Team. Who knows what she would have done had Dave not flipped his lid, considering how Roxy never seemed to be trying to keep her lid sealed at all.

Dirk Strider/(Blue) Link Strider

Jade's designated rival.

Types in his same style
From the original comic.
Swapped to navy text when playing Blue Link, both during the intermission and after Dave granted the Team with an enhancer.

Auto Responder

Switches his text color to black after Dave instructed him to.

    Trolls — Good Twins 

General Tropes

  • Color-Coded Characters: They were given different text colors than their A2 counterparts, which makes it easier to tell the difference between who's talking. This doesn't come up much (due to few of the A1 trolls having high speaking roles and the trolls in general slowly being Demoted to Extra over time), but when it does, it's somewhat useful.
  • The Ghost: For a good chunk of the story. It wasn't until after the end of the Intemission where they were all revealed, and for a while had to be kept offscreen.

Damara Megido

Her trolltag is intermissionIntermission.

Rufioh Nitram

His trolltag is infiniteBangarang.

Mituna Captor

His trolltag is biwinningInsanity.

Puerco Sinois

Her trolltag is never revealed within the adventure, though given how Elitaa's shares initials with Karkat's, it can be asumed that Puerco's shares initials with Kankri's and is DE.

Types like elitaA, Only with actual punctuation addeD.
Speaks/types in a new zealand dialecT, Ala toadfish from bart the generaL.

  • Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: Not within the story itself, but Pikmin Fan has explicitely stated that she will not be making an appearance in any of his later fanworks until further notice, or at least that doing so is very unlikely.
  • Demoted to Extra: Within the story, she's booted out of plot relevance almost as quickly as she's thrown in.
  • Meaningful Name: It's Spanish for "dirty rat." Considering how she isn't really supposed to be that likable....

Kankri Vantas

His trolltag is directionalEnlightenment.

Meulin Leijon

Her trolltag is imaginitiveDisciple.

Porrim Maryam

Her trolltag is eternalInvincibility.

Latula Pyrope

Her trolltag is electileDyzfunktion.

Aranea Serket

Usually just an exposition person until Act Two Intermission One, where she reveals herself as part of the Millennium and later mind controlls the other trolls into following her. Her trolltag is internetExplorer.

Tropes she demonstraights universally or only in normal form

  • Aborted Arc: She steals the recaps from the Author Avatar at one point, though this really serves as nothing aside from getting information she could have already gotten from Omega Drew Pickles.
  • An Arm and a Leg: Gets a leg and a tooth blown off because of Dave's sharingan powers.
  • Ascended Extra: Following Act Two Act One. First she starts by hosting the intermission right after... then she becomes an antagonist.
  • Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Initially presented as a history nerd, Act 2 Intermission 1 shows a hint at her true colors and throughout Act 2 Act 2 she only gets worse, mind controlling many of the named trolls to do her bidding.
  • Hero Killer: Kills off Hank Hill and leads to the deaths of most of the trolls.
  • The Mole: Really working for the Millennium.
  • Ms. Exposition: She gets her information from Omega Drew Pickles.
  • No-Nonsense Nemesis: She is one of the few villains in the comic who always has reasons for not just killing off characters outright (IE John's computer is too slow, she wants to use the trolls for mind controlling, etc), though averted with Hank when he outright provokes her to shoot him in the middle of one of her exposition rants.
  • Shout-Out:
  • Story-Breaker Power: The fact that her octet is context sensitive. While it would make sense that Vriska's would work the same way, this never comes up.
  • Walking Spoiler: Almost everything she does from near the end of Act Two Intermission One is a spoiler.

Tropes she shows only in Slender Mode

Horuss Zahhak

His trolltag is directBuilder.

Kurloz Makara

His trolltag is bigDevotee.

Cronus Ampora

His trolltag is doggedInfantry.

Meenah Peixes

Her trolltag is diamondsDawg. [sic]

  • Demoted to Extra: Overall less relevant and gets less screentime than her Homestuck counterpart, but at least in the intermission and Act Two Act One she gets some roles in tampering with Dave's stuff... until after Aranea's rampage, then she's pretty much shoved to the back and killed off screen.
  • Jerkass: Actually knocks Sollux out and steals his shades.
  • Off the Rails: Tries to invoke this in the Mario session with the prototyping of the Twilight book.

    Trolls — Evil Twins 

Most of the troll's plot relevance — with a few exceptions — has actually been reversed, so that trolls that were important in canon aren't that important in SJAHJ, and visa-versa.

Aradia Megido

  • Living Prop: It really says something when her trolltag was actually changed to averageAllaround in this story.
  • Sacrificial Lamb: The first troll to die (even when counting temporary deaths and fakeouts, with the latter only happening once briefly with Nepeta and the former only occuring with humans), her death also, in a way, vaguely paves the road for the other's deaths.

Tavros Nitram

  • Back for the Dead: He is revived in the middle of Act Two Intermission Two and has an active role early into Act Three, however all he does is remind everyone that Rip is still out there, before Monster Howie Mandel kills him.
  • Took a Level in Badass: Starting Act Two Intermission Two, he stops screwing around. It's revealed in the epilogue that he has reverted back.
  • Took a Level in Jerkass: It started with occasional sparks of self-esteem, then in Act Two Intermission Two things really go down. Then, again, he went back to his old self.

Sollux Captor

  • Locked Out of the Loop: For a huge part of Intermission Act Three, he is the only non-clone troll who does not enter World 8-4.note 
  • Would Hit a Girl: Gets into a bit of a quarrel with Meenah later into the Mario Intermission.

Elitaa Sinois

Hi agaN Jesus blooD

An equal-bloodrights activist who constantly pesters Karkat and accuses his mutation of taking the slot in Troll Town that should be her's. Her STRIFE SPECIBUS is set to PESTICIDEKIND. Her trolltag is chartreuseGenes.

Types by capitalising the first letter in a sentence or after a commA And also caps where a period or comma would bE
Also sometimes capitalizes the last three letters as an ellePSE

  • Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: Not within the story itself, but in anything done by the author (which is only noted for the occasional yet still numerous Continuity Nods). Word of God has said that seeing her in future works is extremely unlikely.
  • Determinator: It's how she got on the yellow ship, after all.
  • Expy: She seems to resemble a combination of John and Jade, in both appearance and vague intrests. This is never explained, if there's any explanation needed at all.
  • Irony: She was designed before the canon reveal of limebloods in troll society. Given what actually happened with limebloods, her equal rights thing takes a little more of a meaningful turn.
  • Jerkass: Mildly. Especially to Karkat.
  • Parody Sue: Shows shades of this. Being an atypical (but canon) blood color as well as being in a relationship with a canon character, plus being friends with several others.
  • Playing with Fire: Her lowblood phychic powers involve pyrokineses.
  • Remember the New Guy?: Hey, remember her? Karkat's kismesis? Even though she doesn't exist in Homestuck? Yeah.
  • Spotlight-Stealing Squad: Surprisingly averted. She bears almost no significance to the plot, and is very often just a Living Prop. Though Pikmin Fan himself hates her, so this is probably a given.
  • Take That!: Her base character is losley based off of Lisa Simpson's feminist tendencies. And given how her extreme anti-mutaint belifes aren't mostly played in a positive light...

Karkat Vantas

  • Butt-Monkey: Spends most of the adventure being tormented by Jade and finally killed by her, and then one of her alts electrocutes him in the Afterlife.
  • Genre Savvy: At the end of Act Two Act One, [[spoiler:he cites himself as being the "expandable" one when Rose attacks him, Kanaya, and Equius. He doesn't die though, until much later.

Nepeta Leijon (And Clones)

During Intermission Act Four onwards, her main self becomes John's patron troll, though they've been dating long before.

Typing quirks 

  • Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Implied. She leaves the Blue and Yellow Team right before their grand showdown and has a little vacation, and is willing to blow up an entire Baby Planet just because its inhabitants might be contacted by the ghost of a previous villain. Her bloodswaps become more horrible the higher up the hemospectrum they are, to the point where her Fuchsia-blooded self is extremely tempermental and violent.
  • Guest-Star Party Member: While other characters assist and leave the Blue and Yellow Team (especially earlier on) like Dirk, she jumps in and out of the group the most often by far. Right down to leaving them right before the final battle because her plans have been completed.
  • Hell Gate: Maroon Nepeta. Through an obscure magic spell, she has two half-dead bodies, one roaming in the afterlives (yes, that's plural) and the other in the living world. Jumping through one links to the other.
  • Immortality: Cannot be killed until after Simpsons ends in real life, and this rule goes for all Nepetas in all of GPF's works.

Kanaya Maryam

During Intermission Act 4 onwards, she becomes Jade's patron troll.

  • Ascended Extra: In spite of being one of the last four trolls of the original group of twelve to be introduced, during Intermission Act Four and within Act Two her screentime increases greatly.
  • Exposition Fairy: She somehow ended up in every major spot during the ship ride from Troll Town to World 8 despite being asleep at first, which lets her explain everything to everyone.
  • Pre-Asskicking One-Liner: "Its On Bitch" Though because it's in the shipping intermission, a fan fic by Spongebob, it's not certain if this is really something she says or not.
  • Totally Radical: After much character reworking, she is the only character outside of John and Jade who uses slang that doesn't use it in canon, and that's only when she's stoned.

Terezi Pyrope

Vriska Serket

Early on in the story, Jade fell on her after falling off the ship, breaking her legs and making her think about karma. While a simple trip to an inn fixed her (and Tavros's) legs, she still insists on righting every wrong she has done.

  • Laser-Guided Karma: Lampshaded, she thinks that her losing her legs had something to do with this. Then there's her being abused by Tavros in Act Two Intermission Two.
  • Took a Level in Jerkass: Inverted. She is made out to be much nicer than her canon counterpart after starting up on her karma list, in an inverse of Tavros and (before canon did it as well) Aranea.
  • Underwear of Power: Invoked with her Karma Girl outfit. Lampshaded here (Link contains Act Two Intermission One spoilers):
    Nepeta: :// < vriska is tat your panies?
    Vriska: No!!!!!!!!
    Nepeta: :// < ...araneas panties?
    Vriksa: DOU8LE NO!!!!!!!!
    Vriska: It just part of the costume I made.
    Vriska: I saw that superheros look like they wear underwear in there costumes so I made the waist part diffent colored like that.

Equius Zahhak

During Intermission Act 4 onwards, he becomes Jane's patron troll.

  • Abhorrent Admirer: To Jane, and to a lesser extent John. Practically every time he talks to either of them, they get disturbed.
  • Big "WHAT?!": In the Shipping Intermission, after finding out Aradia is dead.
  • Breakout Character: Was shoved off to the sidelines until he started contacting John. It began with talks about Nepeta, but eventually he started being a little more plot relevant, before his interests shift over to... well, Jane.

Gamzee Makara

Eridan Ampora

Feferi Peixes

During Intermission Act 4 onwards, she becomes Jake's patron troll.

    Guardians and Ancestors 

Human Gaurdians

Pop Egbert

Dad Lalonde/Drunken Obliterator (DO)/Berton Lalonde

Mom/Sis Strider/Some Katana Chick (KC)

Dick Harley

  • Shout-Out: To The Powerpuff Girls. "Harley" has been mispelled freqeuntly as "Hardly," and "Dick Hardly" is the name of one of the villains. (Yes, really.) However, when reffered to by full name, Dick's last name was never mispelled this way.

Human Ancestors

General Tropes (Including KC and DO)

  • Dropped a Bridge on Him: Everyone gets killed by Rip, except RC and GH who were already eaten by her.
  • Famous Ancestor: All of them, though PH and BC were this to such an extent that they felt they had to give away John and Jane for adoption to avoid getting assassinated.
  • No Name Given: RC, KC, GH, and AD are never named. Averted with Betty, who is only known by her actual name.

Pranking Harlequin (PH)/Harl Makara

John and Jane's biological father and John's accosiated ancestor.

Betty Crocker (BC)

John and Jane's biological mother and Jane's accosiated ancestor.

Sleepy Dogwoman (SD)/Katherine Harley

Jade and Jake's biological mother and Jade's accosiated ancestor. She is (normally) erieely calm and collected, thus giving her the "sleepy" part of her nickname. She is also a viscious pirate that has slaughtered many.

In the present, her two greatest kills (Reddy McCoolshades and Highbuck Lalonde) have been "stolen" from her when Rip assimilated with them. So, she convinces the Mario players to try to help get their bodies back.

Adventure Dude (AD)

Reddy McCoolshades (RC)

  • Impaled with Extreme Prejudice.
  • Posthumous Character: Sort of. While he is killed before the story begins (and indeed, before any of the main four are even born), he is familiarized by Rip. Though as a familiar he doesn't really do anything except serve to freak out Dave.

Grand Highbuck Lalonde (GH)

  • Posthumous Character: Sort of. While she is killed before the story begins (and indeed, just after any of the main four were born), she is familiarized by Rip. Though as a familiar she doesn't really do anything except serve to freak out Dave.

Troll Ancestors

Silencer through Dualscar (And tropes that apply to Condesce as well)

  • Crack Pairing: Invoked with Darkleer and Dolorosa's sudden sexual relationship.
  • A Day in the Limelight: The part of Act Two Intermission One focusing on them.
  • Demoted to Extra: Really have even less relevance and their actual story arc was covered in less words by Aranea, though they themselves get a bit of dialogue. Aranea's description on Summoner best sums up what to expect from their arc:
    "Summoner was a 8adass. And on team "Yes Mutants." He flys. The end."
  • The Ghost: The pre-scratch incarnations of the A2 trolls, with the possible exception of A1-Nepeta considering the Shipping Intermission verse, though that's where things get complicated, are not seen or mentioned. It's implied that the ancestors sort of serve as a "general parent" to both good and evil twins, with their love partners being random background trolls. This is explainable in that next to nothing had been revealed on the Beforan ancestors not just as of the SJAHJ ancestors' introduction but until the end of Sweet Jade and Hella John and at least continuing to the second-to-last update in all of Homestuck, though it is jarring that each of the kids gets an obvious designated "patron" parent (complete with outlines in Jade's flashback story that corresponds to a text color; keep in mind that in SJAHJ, the A2 trolls are given slightly different text color shades) while the troll pairs each have to share one, and that the personalities of the human ancestors (and to a lesser extent, the troll ancestors here) were pretty much made up on the fly.
  • Hand Wave: There was a page where some of them spoke in quirks (their first appearance), followed by a page where they didn't. Much later on it's revealed that this was because of an odd law by the Condesce banning adult trolls from using quirks, and that they were seemingly speaking in quirks as part of rebellion.
  • Immortality: Disciple (and... Huntress, assuming she shares her name with her HHC counterpart and the alternate Nepeta is her) cannot be killed until after Simpsons ends in real life, and this rule goes for all Disciples/Huntresses in all of GPF's works.
  • Name's the Same: Invoked, as Silencer (Aradia's ancestor thanks to the lack of any Handmaid-servent-thing) shares the same name with Silencer (the doll head).
  • Posthumous Character: All of them but Darkleer, Dolorosa, Disciple, and Condesce were either killed by another ancestor, though natural accident, or in Activist's case, the Curser Women.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: With the exception of Disciple, Dolorosa, Darkleer, and Condesce, they were all killed off quickly into the Prospit raid.


She entered the Earth during World War II and tried to take over, but repeated assault from the Millennium prevented that much progress. She was exiled and forced into hiding as she was wanted throughout the world, while the leader of the troll empire was taken over by a currently unknown character. She currently hides at the Strider household.

  • Cloud Cuckoolander: Seen here, she thinks about getting married to Evil Yoshi just because they're both evil.
  • Pet the Dog: She tried to redeem herself by convincing trolls to side with the allies. This didn't exactly work out.



Due to a quirk in the programming and the lack of a clear hatch point such as entry to the Medium, all three sprites can only be prototyped so that it affects Prospit and Derse once. Any subsequent tier prototypings will not affect the carapases.

Edwardcullensprite / Horsesprite

The teal kernel. Tier-1 prototyped with a Twilight book from Kanaya's room, tier-2 prototyped with a (non-pornographic) horse poster from Equius's room.

Horsesprite would eventually merge with a phantom of racism and become Darkhorse. Because of a low trope count for all of them, and since they are close to the same person (Darkhorse is just Horsesprite with different looks, the ability to talk, and being racist), tropes on this sprite will be listed under Darkhorse in the Millennium folder.

  • Our Vampires Are Different: Starter of the whole vampire craze via an extremely complicated Stable Time Loop, but despite being prototyped from a copy of Twilight, he's (or at least his derivatives) more like a Hellsing vampire with buffs (think near-instant Alucard abilities on th start) than a Twilight vampire.
  • Your Vampires Suck: Averted! He begets prototyped Jack, who begets Vampire Jade, who, in addition to begetting Vampire Dave who begets Vampire Rose, is the ectobiological mother of Rip Van Winkle, who goes back in time and spreads the vampirism everywhere, including to Alucard, who in turn is one of Lord Major Quimby's four parents, who also goes back and starts a number of other vampires and is the chaosfather (along with Rip) to Edith and Edmund, and he clones himself into an entire Simpsonian race. Somewhere down the line, Luke, Jan, Tubalcain, and Zorin come out of this chain of vampirism — basically, he is the origin of a long line of badass vampires.

Davosesprite / Jennsprite / Planksprite

The yellow kernel. Tier-1 prototyped with a combination of Dave's Future Past Dream Self and a suddenly conjured, non-temporally displaced dreamself of Rose. They have a merged personality, unless Rose is awake, wherein Dave completely takes over mentally. (Since Rose did not use abstracted thought before being prototyped.) In the alternate universe (technically a Bad Future, although they are in two completely seperate, non-paradoxical timelines that were identical or near identical aside from the beginning of the school rooftop battle), the sprite was prototyped with the broken pieces of Plank. John from this timeline tried to pull a Davesprite and prototype himself, but died as Davosesprite refused to let themself be prototyped with him. In the "main" timeline, Roxy would yank out the dream projection of John's inner female self and prototype her into it unexpectedly, preventing the alternate Jane from prototyping herself or another guide.

For tropes on Jennsprite, see the Blue and Yellow Team folder, as Jennsprite is essentially just a transformation of Jenn. Tropes that only apply to Dave and Rose individually, even whist in Davosesprite, go under "Davosesprite-Dave" and "Davosesprite-Rose," respectivley, under the Blue and Yellow Team folder. This will also cover tropes on Plank in general.

davosesprite talks by alternating between dave and roses quirks or two different combinations therof
They are completely separate when it comes to Pesterchum for some reason.
Planksprite talks entirley through using highly compressed images of Kurloz's talk sprites from canon.
jennsprite uses her/john's quirk.

  • Ambiguous Gender: Back before the second-tier prototyping, Vampire Dave refers to them as "he," but Rose suggests using "they" instead. Then again, Rose also suggests that any sprites that are more-or-less two people equally sharing the same body should also be "they," even if both participants are the same gender (unlike canon's Erisolsprite, Fefetasprite, and Arquiusprite). This is made all the more confusing by how, originally, the Rose self would completely leave the sprite whenever Rose woke up. Planksprite is supposedly male, and Jennsprite is female, however, as being prototyped in succession in this verse will "overwrite" most of one character's personality while simultaneous prototyping mixes them together.
  • Heel–Face Revolving Door: They — or at least the Dave half — turn crazy sooner than the Red and Red Team. After dying, they are the first Derse-kids who turn back, with everybody else (bar Vampire Dave and Vampire Rose, who stay evil to the end) not doing so until a quick scene in the "Where Are They Now?" Epilogue.
  • The Quiet One: As Planksprite, he lets Kurloz images do the talking for him. In a way...
  • Retcon: A very mild example. Their shirt/overall inner color went from being pure white to a dull, pale yellow, presumably because Fan thought that looked better.
  • Royal "We": Davosesprite refers to themselves as "we," justified since they're two different people and still have a lot of seperation elements to them.
  • Two Beings, One Body: Like with Icekingzersprite, only as they get more screentime and dialogue. Downplayed in that, at first, when Rose was awake
  • What Happened to the Mouse?: Not so much the character as certain mechanics. The comic brings up a few interesting questions about what would happen with the sprite in certain circumstances, like if they used Abstracted Thought (as the Dream Dave involved already did, but the Dream Rose didn't, and Dave never used the move twice with the same dreamself). Davosesprite never really does this, and eventually the issue is worked around when Vampire Dave brings Rose back via a kiss-revive then basically adds a new soul to the Rose-corpse by making her into a vampire. Unlike abstracted thought, kiss-revivals are more about the waking person, so Dave's dream link was not affected.

Icekingzersprite / Johnsprite / Dovesprite

The blue kernel. Tier-one prototyped by the ghosts of Bowser and the Ice King (both of which are Mario session constructs) thanks to the Nepeta team (specifically, one-half of her maroon-blooded self), all of those affected by them gain Bowser's shell and fire breath, and Ice King's ice powers and crown. At the cost, the prototype-crown seems to be just as dangerous as its canonical counterpart... in one alternate timeline, the heroes managed to get Dave's inner female self/Dove out and prototype her into the mix, while in the main one, Roxy took out a dream projection of John from the Kanaya-dream mission and prototyped that specifically to prevent the group from prototyping anyone useful.

Since Johnsprite would later become Trickster John, tropes regarding him would go under Trickster John's entry in the Blue and Yellow Team folder. Dovesprite is basically the same as Dove, so tropes on her will go under the Red and Red Team folder. Inversing the exclusion and redirecting of tropes, this will cover the tropes of not just Icekingzersprite but also the Ice King and Bowser individually.

  • Back from the Dead: Icekingzersprite is the only straight example; neither of the other two kernels have been prototyped with anything dead. For that matter, none of the kernels in the Bad Future have been prototyped with something dead either.
  • Divergent Character Evolution: Johnsprite started out as just John but as a sprite. Then came in the Tricksterizing. It's implied that it will wear off and he'll "just" be a completely ordinary clone (not even with the Bowser/Ice King powers as
  • For the Evulz: As Icekingzersprite, he does his evil deeds because he feels like he is compelled to.

    Fox Crew — General and Main Four 

All or Most of them Provide Examples of:

  • We Hardly Knew Ye: Most of them died after introduction. Stan, Cleveland, and Peter came back, only to die again.

Hank Hill
Hank often appears drawn like this in this comic.

The leader of the entire gang and the Red Group specifically, though like all groups this never actually comes into light. His chumhandle is rightWorker.

  • The Comically Serious: He's the closest character in the entire adventure to fit this type, with parts of his house being destroyed at least twice by something Jade/Jude did indirectly, yet reacting with his standard "Bwah"s and otherwise keeping up his comparatively serious personality.
  • Doesn't Like Guns: Hence why he's the only one of the main four to not use a gun of sorts. Thanks to the shooting contest in his past, he swears off guns in part of his hatred towards Rip.
  • Flaming Sword: Bears one. Like most of the "major" character's weapons, this one had an origin related to a complicated Stable Time Loop
  • Nonstandard Character Design: Like Rip to the Millennium (only to a greater extent), he's drawn much larger than most of his fellow Fox Crew members.
  • Odd Name Out: His handle initials are RW. Given how the other main three are GG, TT, and TG, it's implied that, like John, he takes the place of GT. This is more or less confirmed with the reveal of the other twelve. His chat handle initials are also the same as the initials of Rip's name, and visa-versa. "GT" itself is revealed much later to be Waterwraith's handle, but this does not appear to bear any significance.
  • Only Sane Man: Compared to the other members. Although compared to everyone else in the series...
  • Sacrificial Lion: Finally killed off in the end of Act Two Intermission One, and is Aranea's first victim. While he was Demoted to Extra over the course of Act Two until this point (and arguably Intermission Acts Three and Four, to a lesser extent), his death and the big lead up to it should be taken as warning signs that Aranea isn't the character who screws around. And, of course, late into Act 2 she begins killing off nearly all of the trolls for real, leaving nothing but Leijons left.
  • Weapon of Choice: He uses a Flaming Sword. Notably this falls in stark contrast with the other members of the main four, who all use some kind of gun. This is hinting at the shooting contest incident — Hank hated what Rip did so much that he pretty much swore off guns alltogether.

Cleveland Brown

The Yellow Group leader. His chumhandle is groovyGuy.

Peter Griffin

The Green Group leader. His chumhandle is tubularTelevision.

Stan Smith

The Blue Group leader. His chumhandle is terroristGibber.

    Fox Crew — Minor Twelve and Associates 

Red Group

Consists of Hank's buddies.

Bill Dautrieve

His chumhandle is cardiacAtoner.

Dale Gribble

His chumhandle is conspiricyTheorist.

Jeff Boomhauer

His chumhandle is captivatingChattyguy.

Yellow Group

Consists of Family Guy secondaries.

Glenn Quagmire

His chumhandle is totallyCultured.

Joe Swanson

His chumhandle is asskickingCop.

Brian Griffin

His chumhandle is totalAthiest.

Green Group

Basically the miscellaneous squad.

Tim the Bear

His chumhandle is allTim.

Fuckass Mike

An original character who swears. A lot. His chumhandle is giganticAsshole. He is based on The Angry Video Game Nerd immitators. Despite this, he has no relation to Motherfucker Mike.

Dotty Campbell

A nudist. Like most nudists (becides every single other nudist we see in the series), she is extremely hard to kill. Her chumhandle is allnaturalGangsta.

She is also a fill-in teacher for the kids at Tom Landry Middle. At least, before Dave blows up the entire school.

Blue Group

Consists of the wives of the group leaders, bar Peggy. Though dialogue from Hank implies that she would have been an official member of the Fox Crew.

Lois Griffin

Her chumhandle is greatChubbychaser.

Donna Brown

Her chumhandle is cimthewifeofGroovyguy. No, really.

Francine Smith

Her chumhandle is attractiveAsskicker.


Peggy Hill

    Millennium and Associates 

Millennium Members

(For those wondering: The first ten are all from Hellsing, Cartman is from South Park, Hydra is based on the dragon bosses from the Nintendo 3DS AR games, Waterwraith is from Pikmin 2, and Death Mecha and Darkhorse are pretty much original characters if the images are ripped from Google.)

General Tropes

  • Demoted to Extra: Compared to both Hellsing and Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals, everyone bar Rip suffers from this.
  • Mythology Gag: To Hecksing. Zorin's still quirk-spamming (though even worse), Rip's still clear, Captain's still loud and obnoxious, etc.
  • Nice Hat: As with the Felt. The fact that the hats are ripped from Homestuck canon probably has something to do with it.
  • Verbal Tic: All of the numbered members type with punctuation count the same as their hat numbers. This wasn't done at first, though that may be a case of Early Installment Weirdness.

Luke Valentine (1)

His chumhandle is fuckinFoncy. Unlike Jan's below, it is rendeered in lowercase initials.

Jan Valtentine (2)

His chumhandle is fucketyFuck.

  • Foregone Conclusion: In the Fox Crew's portion of the second character select arc, it's certain that he and Waterwraith will die because an earlier page mentioned both of them being killed. And said page also showed Jan's decapitated head.
  • Troll: Like in Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals, he prooves as a major annoyance to the Millennium's enemies. Not only is he given a broken power he doesn't have in canon, but then there's how he undoes all the damange done by Cleveland, Peter, and Stan by reviving everyone they killed.
    JV: (singing as he tosses the corpses into a field of 1-ups): i am an asshole, i am an asshole, I AM SUCH AN ASSHOLE!

Tubalcain Alhambra (3)

His chumhandle is cardGuy, which also goes with his nickname. He shares the name initials as Donna Brown, who also loves Cleveland, but this is probabl a coincidence. Probably.

Schrodinger (4)

His chumhandle is quantumFysicks. [sic]

Zorin Blitz (5)

Her chumhandle is inceptionMetaphor.

Walter C. Dornez (6)

His chumhandle is betrayingButler.

Doctor (7)

A mad scientist and the first Millennium member to die. Also the first one to be completely introduced. His chumhandle is madScientist.

  • Demoted to Extra: Noted here because he gets it far worse than any other member of the Millennium, and that's saying a lot.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: He gets stabbed by Hank in the panel right after his introduction.

Rip Van Winkle (8)

"HH: I know at least one alternate universe counterpart of me that would kill you and your friend and paint a swastika out of your blood.
HH: Yes. But even if you try to fight us in this universe, I won't do that.

HH: I will paint a hat instead."

John and Jade's patron guide in regards to the Millennium's forces, she mostly advices them not to fight them. Her chumhandle is hellishHuntress.

She's also the series's final villain, rising to power through various means throughout the Mario Intermission and late into Act 2.

Communicates in proper spelling and grammar. Uses these stupid vampire fanged smilies a lot. =(:
Does not normally use a number gimmick like the rest of the Millennium, unless something catches her off guard!!!!!!!!

  • Big Bad: She was shaped to be this near the beginning once the Millennium starts thinning out a little. Then Dave's villainy forces the Blue and Yellow Team to detour possibly fighting her as they have to fight against the Red and Red Team, then things go back to Rip.
  • Couldn't Find a Pen: Like her canon self. See her quote.
  • Eerie Pale-Skinned Brunette: And Hank hates them, because of her.
  • Establishing Character Moment: Even for those that don't know of Hellsing, it's clear that she's not the sanest character in the adventure based on what she says to John in their first on-screen conversation. Just look at the quote for her. And to hammer it in, we do see a bloody hat painting on the wall when she types this, with no indication as to where the blood came from. Her first complete on-screen appearance is after she destroys the Death Mecha.
  • In Spite of a Nail: She still gets killed by a chest-related injury.
  • Lawful Evil/Zeroth Law Rebellion: In-universe. Like her leader, she is quite careful not to break any laws. Notably, any kills she caused after the Quimby-ruled Millennium were either of self-defense, people who aren't legally considered alive (the game constructs, robots), or tresspassers. She then proceeds to throw these rules right out the window once she frees the Hat Goddess.
  • Meaningful Name:
    • The fact that her chum initials are HH while Hank's are RW should be a big clue as to that they have some sort of connection with eachother.
    • She gives herself the fake title of "Maid of Doom." She was basically fodder in canon. In fact, this may have been pointed out in her first conversation with Jade, where she says "it's as if you were made of doom."
    • Her actual name of Rip Van Winkle. She herself isn't sleepy, but Jade was in canon and it was once implied that she still has narcolepsy. Well... Jade turns out to be her mother, in a way.
    • hellishHuntress, aside from the initials. She attempts to rule over the multiverse, starting with Heaven (eh... close enough). Not only does she declare herself a huntress, but as does Nepeta. Rip ends up getting the power of the Hat Goddess, who is part of an alternate version of Nepeta. In addition to this and supporting this, Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals's interpretation of pre-scratch Nepeta is named the Huntress.
  • No Swastikas: "I will paint a hat instead." She — and the Millennium in general — are never actually seen with swastikas, though it's possible that the issue almost never comes up, given how pre-Nazi Millennium is hardly featured.
  • Nonstandard Character Design: Drawn larger than the average member of the Millennium, to heighten her importance to the storyline compared to everyone else.
  • Obviously Evil: This is her first full appearance. It's hard to think that she's a good guy.
  • Only the Author Can Save Them Now: She gets ridiculous amounts of power near the end. This is lampshaded (possibly meaning the trope was invoked, considering SBIG), even if the thing that's saving them did come into play earlier, its still rather... out-there in its origins in of itself:
  • Phonetic Accent: Averted alongside not speaking with (intentional) typoes at all.
  • Reread Bonus: Pretty much invoked since this isn't foreshadowing so much as a double meaning. The epilogue reveals that she is John and Vampire Jade's ectodaugther. Her actions and unusual attatchment towards John and Jade make a lot more sense if you view her as a womanchild daughter trying to be recognized by her (biological) parents, especially her freak out that leads to her destroying GHES.
  • Scary Shiny Glasses: Bears these in her first appearance, and a few others. Oddly, they glow the same color as her text.
  • Villainous Breakdown: She... briefly loses her cool here. If her final expression while Jaka is killing her is any indication, she stays pissed off like this for the rest of the story before the epilogue.
    RW: The first thing I want to do is kill THIS piece of trash!!!!!!!!
    RW: Remember the good old days, where ***I*** used to be your expositionator???????? Your patron????????
    RW: I guided you on the Millennium!!!!!!!! If it wasn't for me, you would have been dead, okay????????
    RW: Dead by the Waterwraith, who can be killed by CARROT ANTS in the Mario game that got exported to Springfield in the great Prospit crash, and then wiped out extinct by both Aranea and the explosion.
    RW: Ever since I located you and transfered this dreamself to resemble my current self to alert you of my presence, I recall everything you said while in me!!!!!!!!
    RW: It was "GHES" this and "GHES" that!!!!!!!! Revolting!!!!!!! I'm not even sure what it stands for!!!!!!!!
    *Rip stomps on GHES in the next panel.*
  • Walking Spoiler: Pretty much most of what she does throughout Act Two. Like how she blew up Texas, summoned the Hat Goddess, and most of the final showdown in general.

Lucky "The Captain" Failington (9)

His chumhandle is "THECAPTAIN."

Janitor/Former Major (10)

His chumhandle is "loathingLeader."

Eric Cartman (11)

He was one of Silencer's four creations on Prospit's moon. His chumhandle is "respectmahAuthoritah."

Hydra (12)

A three headed dragon being, each head has powers that could either apply to the entire dragon (IE water breathing) or just to that head (mainly firing projectiles).

His chumhandles vary between the heads: Yellow's is "earthHead," Green's is "toxicHead," and Blue's is "waterHead."

Waterwraith (13)

A ghost that was first seen haunting Nepeta's new hive and the first Millennium member to be implied to exist. He was one of Silencer's four creations on Prospit's moon. His chumhandle is ghostlyTrouble.

  • Jerkass: Rip actually describes him as being a dick.
  • Nigh Invulnerable: Purple Pikmin are apparantly its only weakness, as with Pikmin canon. Not even drinking him can stop him; he'll just possess who ever drinks him and willingly vomit himself out if he wants to leave the body for whatever reason.
  • Red Eyes, Take Warning: Karkat dons red eyes after being possessed by him.

Death Mecha (14)

A large mecha specifically designed as a weapon used by the Millennium. Its chumhandle is bigassRobot.

  • The Brute: By far the biggest member of the Millennium, not counting Quimby's potential-but-never-used-onscreen size alteration powers.
  • Sacrificial Lamb: To show how much of a dick Rip is.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: Dies in its second appearance.
  • The Worf Effect: Gets killed/destroyed/blown up by Rip Van Winkle as punishment for killing the Captain.

Darkhorse (15)

Very little is known about this skeleton/horse hybrid prior to Act 2 Act 2. He seems to be the only member of the Millennium Hank likes. His chumhandle is undeadHorse.

  • Beware the Silly Ones: He was actually the member that largely contributed to Alucard's death.
  • Ensemble Dark Horse: In-universe, to Hank Hill. And it seems the Blue and Yellow Team would have liked him too, until it turns out he is a racist.
  • Fantastic Racism: He thinks TROLLS SUCK!
  • The Quiet One: He doesn't say anything for a long time after his introduction. The first actual line in the story he gets is him saying that trolls suck.
  • Nonstandard Character Design: He is one of the few characters who is constantly portrayed as a mash-up of a Google image and an MS Paint drawing, and that serves as his "default" look. He is also constantly drawn like this, whereas the other characters' style appearances can vary considerably.
  • Our Monsters Are Weird: He appears to be a skeleton-horse hybrid. Even though he's really a vampirehorsesprite-racismcloud hybrid.
  • Sacrificial Lamb: Parodied along with Ensemble Dark Horse. It's obvious that he is either going to die after his appearance or something terrible will happen. He is also the very second permenant death of a Millennium member.
  • Suddenly Voiced:
    • He finally speaks in Act 2 Act 2, but even then he does't say much.
    • He appears in Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals (and counting both HHC and HUC, everyone Millennium member except Omega Drew Pickles has appeared over the span of both stories), where he is very much the Large Ham.
  • We Hardly Knew Ye: He's killed off two pages after his first proper appearance, doing only slightly better than Doctor who was killed off after only one. Although he does get some screentime later thanks to exposition and time travel.

Ωmega Drew Pickles (Cue Ball)

Whereas Rip acts as the guide for John and Jade, Drew acts as an implied guide to Aranea. He is one of Silencer's four creations on Prospit's moon.

Lord Major Quimby (Cue Stick/Cycle)

The new leader of the Millennium. He is the ectobiological son of Homer Simpson('s data extracted from the combined movie by the Silencer), a cuestick-resembling plant with temporal abilities, a copy of Ed Edd N Eddy The Mis Ed Ventures, and Alucard. These give him the powers of, respectivley; scaling himself up or down to massive or tiny sizes (which he never uses onscreen), traveling anywhere around space and time, bizzare skills resembling moves and other things from the game (such as an infinite supply of stink bombs and water balloons), and extreme vampiric abilities that border of Eldritch Abomination levels.

  • Mayor Pain: Ironically more Wilkins than... well... Quimby. He is implied to do a decent job over the Springfield Nation, but he's evil. And thanks to very odd loopholes, nobody can do a damn thing about it without breaking the law.
  • The Un-Reveal: Double subverted. First, upon the 2x ectobio button press, the scene immediatley switches to Jude before Quimby is really shown. But it is quickly said that this takes place in the past (understandable, given how Jade had drank her Quest Gatorade some time ago). Once the time LMQ's creation is made, we hear a bit of John and Jean under attack, but before Jude and Jade get there, the perspective changes again to Ωmega Drew Pickles.
    Ωmega Drew Pickles: ...And I have decided why not to show everyone before seeing my mastar, Lord Major Quimby? Actually no. I didn't decide that. GPF did. He runs the show here, after all. For now...
But a little after that, he's outright shown.


Edith Quimby

This series's version of Calliope. Being Lord Major Quimby's chaosbiological and rather rebellious daughter (her only actually connections with the Millennium), she is a Simpsonian, and like all Simpsonians (barring Homer if he was considered Simpsonian) she is also a vampire.

  • Beware the Nice Ones: Attempts to lead an army to destroy Springfield, and later the world. She also nearly succeeds in killing Jane, notably doing a better job than Rose did.
  • Canada, Eh?: Her first line seen ends in "eh," and she adds an unnecessary "U" at the end of every o. (As long as it's not the first o in a double o, IE "gooUd afternooUn".)
  • Retcon: She's not Cherub because Lord English doesn't exist in this.
  • The Unintelligible: The new addition to her quirk makes her logs a somewhat of a challenge to read.
  • You Don't Look Like You: She doesn't look remotely like Calliope at all. This, combined with the complete personality overhaul, new name, and added "Canadian" quirk, makes her handle, color, and U-capitalization the only recognizable characteristics of her left.
  • You Gotta Have Blue Hair.

Edmund Quimby

This series's version of Caliborn, also being a Simpsonian and Lord Major Quimby's obidient son.

  • Lawful Evil: In-universe, he gets it from his dad.
  • Punny Name: "Edmund" was the name of the Edward parody in a Treehouse of Horror episode. Lord Major Quimby, and all Simpsonians barring Homer, are part vampire.
  • Retcon: See Edith.
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: Averted while in Springfield. He almost never says anything worse than "damn" or "hell." Edith, on the other hand....
  • You Don't Look Like You: Much like Edith, he doesn't look like Caliborn or even really a "Simpson"-version of him. He hardly acts like him, either.

Aranea Serket

Actually a secret spy member or something. For tropes on her, see her entry under the Good Twin trolls folder.


Mario Universe, Uncategorized

Good Yoshi/Boshi

  • Jerkass: Revealed as this from Intermission Act Two onwards. John still likes him for some reason though. Seeing as his Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals self likes Geno, who also seemed like a big jackass, Johns liking jerks must be a recurring thing in GPF's works.

The Evil

The boss of World 8 in the Mario session and the intended final battle of the whole game.

  • Authority Equals Asskicking: Subverted. It is in high command over the other bosses, but until it merges with the Shipper Worm and the black hole, John and Jade have a fairly easy time fighting it.
  • Dem Bones: A dark skeleton... thing.
  • Invisible Anatomy: Sometimes only represented by its head, even though the original drawing very clearly has a body.
  • Verbal Tic: It always talks in comic sans, and is the only character who does so.
  • The Worf Effect: It apparantly does this to Bowser, killing him off screen and taking over as the leader of the castle. Why Bowser's minions would mindlessly follow it is unknown.

Other World Bosses

The Princess

  • Living Prop: Barely speaks much at all, even near the Mario session and after it's over. And then she's blown up along the rest of Texas.


The Revenge Five

General Tropes

  • Full-Frontal Assault: Homer convinces himself that this is their shtick. CW and BR are completely naked, and as a ghost and a dragon Pokemon/Yoshi respectively, Silencer and Evil Yoshi do not need clothes in the first place.
  • Really Was Born Yesterday:
    • Evil Yoshi was hatched shortly after the beginning of the story, and just stayed hidden in the egg for some reason. (Or the Yoshi twins were just trapped in their eggs, as with Super Mario World and Super Mario Galaxy 2) Silencer was created by Gamzee on the first day of the story. Homer, CW, and BR might count too, as they were all imprints from data at the movies, meaning that while their characters are much older, their chronological age is only a day old, which goes up to only a few days.
    • Later on, however, a few of them age a little. Bank Robber and Evil Yoshi go 13 years in the past, where the former dies shortly after. The latter, however, goes on to become the oldest of the bunch (despite being the only one who comes closest to being born the "normal" way), spending ten years with the Condesce, then reuniting with the rest of the group who was warped three years before the start of the story. From then, Silencer is killed, CW and Homer spend three years there, and Evil Yoshi adds those same three years and technically becomes 13.
  • Refugee from TV Land: Silencer, while it may also count as this thanks to technically being from Pikmin 2, can induce this by forming living beings based off of "data" from movies it scans.


Created by Gamzee after being convinced to do such by Hank Hill, it was originally just supposed to break up the date between John and Nepeta. (As revenge for John and Jade breaking Hank's window.) However, it shortly after came to life with the only thing on its mind being to not just to ruin them but to break the two up — by any means necessary.

talks by replacing "o" with "0," just like dead aradia.
uses n0 caps, and ellipses 0ften...

Haunted Chick Monster Curser/The Curser Woman

One of three agents created by the Silencer after the computer data within the combined movie. This one is supposedly invincible, and has some sort of demonic powers. These include replication and phychic manipulation.

Talks normally.

  • Amazing Technicolor Population: She can pull this off by herself, thanks to her duplication.
  • Evil Counterpart: To the Blue and Yellow Team as a whole. Compare her self-replication powers with the massive numbers of alter egoes they make.
  • Mind over Matter: One of her primary abilities (other than replication) is to move almost anything by sheer mental power. This includes easily snapping Morshu in half.
  • Nigh Invulnerable: Unable to be killed by anything other than the Bible. Jake manages to finish off every single copy of her by shooting out pages of the Bible as spit balls, which seems to shoot right through their heads.
  • Really 700 Years Old: She's actually about 100 (from her original film), though according to Jade she looks like she's in her 20s.
  • Self-Duplication: Her main ability. Her copies are all in different colors from her main self.
  • Self-Fanservice: Discussed in-universe in the non-canon 2000 page special (Contains spoilers), where Jade interviews the entire Revenge Five:
    CW: ...After all, I am the deadliest member. And the hottest.
    Jade: i can agree but i doubt the readers will
    Jade: well unless someone draws painfully hot fanart of you
    Jade: which is unlikley
  • Straight Woman: To Homer's comical and random self. It gets more obvious after Bank Robber and Silencer die, getting rid of more of the "serious" members.
  • The Worf Effect: The entire population of Prospit's moon can't do shit about her.

Homer Simpson

The second of three agents brought to creation by the Silencer.

Talks by coloring the letters that are in his first name gold. Everything else is in black.

Bank Robber

The last of the three agents, this man resembles Problem Sleuth. (Something Dave, this universe's author of PS, notes.) He is an expert criminal and skilled fighter, who's main motivation for joining the Revenge Five is money.

Talks normally.

Evil Yoshi/Charizard

Talks normally.

  • Evil Twin: To Good Yoshi, a far more straighter example than the other good/evil twin pairs (except for Vriska and Aranea, though that is pretty much an inverse.)
  • Non-Indicative Name: He's probably the most passive out of the Revenge Five (but that's not saying much), since he becomes pretty good friends with Condesce and even lets Roxy ride him all the way from Arlen to Springfield. The other members just have a mentality of "Kill this, kill that, maybe get rich along the way."
  • The Worf Effect: He manages to scare off even Hydra, of the Millennium, shortly after evolving.

Sburb/Coolstuck Related

Coolstuck Players


  • Knight of Cerebus: Jack, but not for the reason you would think. It's because he makes the story's first real implication that Dave and Rose actually do want Jade dead deep down inside. What makes matters worse is that this scene mimicks Bec Noir realizing that he has Bec's loyalty to Jade in canon.


Spongebob Squarepants

A very mysterious man who is introduced at the end of Intermission Intermission One, having written the Shipping Intermission. He is revealed later on to be stuck on Prospit's moon with Omega Drew Pickles, and the two are heading on a ride to Earth as the moon had since been hijacked by the Revenge Five. He was one of Silencer's four creations on Prospit's moon.

His trolltag is listed as "suckmydick," but the initials are written as his name in all caps.

when not using his trollish-persona he types in all lower case and acts very energetic!

  • Catchphrase: For each of the eight kids. For all of them except Dave, it's one line.
  • Cool Shades: Lifted them from a dead Prospitian who stylized their outfit to be like Dave's and Rose's.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He invokes the "jerk" part, giving this guise to make past-Jade feel bad.
  • Shipper on Deck: Agressive supporter for John/Jade and Jane/Jake. Very agressive supporter.
  • Stylistic Suck: His fan fics have been reported by Jean and John to be bad. If the Shipping Intermission is any indication (and it probably isn't, given how it's based on an actual parallel universe), it is.
  • Token Good Teammate: After Act 2 Act 2 reveals that Dave has full authority over both Prospitians and Dersites, he ironically becomes this to the moon group, as everyone else is either a direct supporter of the Millennium, part of the Revenge Five, or working for Dave.
  • Troll: The kind that insults people, not the species kind. After being insulted by Jade for the insults he gave in the past (not even knowing why she was insulting him), he goes back and makes the human kids' lives a living hell. Thanks to a Stable Time Loop, this is what pushes them to send him the insults in the first place.


Great Pikmin Fan

The story's Author Avatar, taking the form as a green Pikmin with no distinct features present in other kinds of Pikmin. He apparantly lives in Springfield, and is Edmund's servant or something.

Types by coloring a third of his words red, a third yellow, and a third blue. Uses a dark green background.
This could either span paragraphs or only be line-by-line.
Usually all lines have a word count at a multiple of three.
Sometimes, usually when not given enough time to "think" of how to structure his sentences, he types in simple black, without a care for if the number of words is divisible by three.note 

The Hat Goddess

Also goes by heavensHeart. She is a mysterious, super cosmic figure that Rip worships. Her icon is that of a touque looking similar to what Ezekiel wears.

Not much is revealed about her until Act Three. It turns out that she is a fusion of the Nepeta and Meulin from an alternate universe where the events of Intermission Intermission One really happened, after completeing a test. As characters's Shipping Intermission selves are basically like their old selves, tropes on either the original Nepeta or Meulin go under their respective entries. That, and to avoid over-spoilering.

She appears in person and on-screen only once — right after the Blue and Yellow Team kills Rip, whom had been previously "owning" her and using her to do whatever she desired. She explains about her backstory, and the story of 496 Reasons as part of it, and vows to make the Afterlives a better place, while giving the B&YT a "meta upgrade" that causes the chatlogs to refer to them in a slightly different manner.

after being freed, she types in all lo{|wer case and uses more frequent punctuation.
in either case, she alternates her text co{|lo{|r between the twelve "no{|n-mutant" shades in the hemo{|spectrum.
always tries to{| have a wo{|rd with the letter "O" in it fo{|r every line.

  • Amazing Technicolor Population/Rainbow Skinned Space Babe: An odd mixture of both, thanks to being a divine troll. She seems to change the color of herself.
  • Big Good: Even moreso than the three Gods.
  • Chekhovs MIA: First mentioned by Rip, doesn't appear until a long time later.
  • Fog Feet: Has this as part of her design, in spite of not being a sprite.
  • Foreshadowing: Her actual identity is hinted at since her third line:
  • Immortality: As if being a God isn't enough, she can't be killed before Simpsons ends. Real life Simpsons, that is.
  • Nice Hat: Oddly averted despite her name. However, she tries to work a toque into most of her lines.
  • Odd Name Out: She, Luke, and Edmund are the only three characters in the entire comic with lower case Chumhandle initials.
  • Power Glows: When Rip frees her from the prison, she creates a huge column of light alternating between her twelve theme colors.
  • Sealed Evil in a Can/Sealed Good in a Can: Whichever depends on how she's used. She's good by default, though.
  • Superpower Lottery: The strongest character in the entire comic, even said to surpass the Gods themselves. While the creation of the original four Hells, Heaven, and Afterlife Waiting Room are never elaborated upon, she manages to create four infinitely large new factions of the afterlife almost instantly, and that's supposedly just a taste of what she can do. Getting this power was no easy task: The alternate Nepeta and Meulin were from a timeline chosen very rarely, doing a task that is implied to surpass the Gods and replace their rule, and they needed the help of another Meulin from a completely different story in a completely different multiverse with completely different methods of working, which in turn required help from linking the Leijon's lives up with the Simpsons in Real Life itself.
  • Two Beings, One Body: Though she/they can separate, they never do so onscreen.
  • Walking Spoiler: Probably the biggest offender in the entire story, and that's saying a lot. Her existance is something of a spoiler, as is the context — right down to what universe she's from — and her being the answer to the mystery as to who was the "hh" that contacted Blue Demon Jade.
  • Winged Humanoid: Size-shifting wings. They can grow to be huge, large enough to stick out of an entire castle.


Example of: