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    Eskarina Smith 
Wizards on Discworld have always born the eighth son of an eighth son. Esk was born the eighth child of an eighth son, but inherited the magical staff and powers of Drum Billet, a wizard from Unseen University. This caused quite a bit of confusion as to whether she was a Witch or Wizard (both have very different rules and powers - or to be more accurate, very different ways of using power), and under the tutelage of Granny Weatherwax, she journeys to Unseen University to seek her destiny.

She is accepted into UU as the first (and so far only) woman wizard. After an incredibly long absence in the books (34 books and 23 real world years), she returns in I Shall Wear Midnight where it is revealed she has grown up, has a son, and has developed time-travelling powers.



  • Achievements in Ignorance: Before her formal training, she (mostly through her staff) performs some pretty impressive tricks, like turning ale into milk, and then milk into apple brandy.
  • Action Mom: Briefly alludes to having a son, most probably by Simon.
  • Body Surf: She learns how to Borrow animals from Granny Weatherwax, but discovers the hard way that if she stays in one body too long, she can't return to her body, the animal's mind starts to reassert itself and she eventually forgets that she's a girl.
  • Character Development: She goes from a child with a marked lack of empathy and too much intelligence for her own good to a cool middle aged woman who serves as something of a mentor to Tiffany Aching (who was, in some ways, very similar to Esk when she first appeared) when she turns up in I Shall Wear Midnight.
  • Children Are Cruel: One of Esk's main flaws in the earlier parts of Equal Rites is her marked lack or empathy for others — she isn't vicious or nasty, but for a longest time she simply does not think to consider the feelings or well-being of anyone who isn't Esk herself. Perhaps the most notable example of this is her attitude after she's accidentally turned her brother Gulta into a pig; despite having recent experiences herself on how awful it is to be stuck in a body/shape not your own, she never feels bad for him and initially refuses to change him back because she's annoyed with him. Likewise, she thinks nothing of abandoning Granny Weatherwax in "forn parts" and never bothers to go looking for her. Still, there's no actual malice in Esk, she's just thoughtless. When her magic finally actually hurts someone (and someone she likes at that) she is shocked and appalled, and feels so guilty that she throws her staff away.
  • Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: She personally punches out creatures from the Dungeon Dimensions. Granted, they aren't physically very strong, but she was a nine-year-old girl trapped in an Eldritch Location, and she had to overcame her initial fear of them.
  • Empathic Weapon: Her staff, which used to belong to her predecessor and has a mind of its own. It towers over Esk and will defend her if she's in danger. She disguises it as a broom to avoid attention.
  • Little Miss Badass: She was born in a town called Bad Ass (which was named after a legendary "Disobedient Donkey"), and eventually fights off Eldritch Abominations.
  • Long Bus Trip: She was the protagonist of the third book, Equal Rites, and seemed to have dropped out of sight after her happy ending. Twenty years later, she appeared in I Shall Wear Midnight, an adult and a mother now, and aided Tiffany Aching in her battle with the Cunning Man.
  • Time Master: She developed these powers on her Long Bus Trip before her appearance in I Shall Wear Midnight.

    Simon 

A brilliant young wizard Esk meets at UU, who becomes the unwitting pawn of Things from the Dungeon Dimension as a means to cross over to the Disc.



  • Expy: He's described in I Shall Wear Midnight as being so infirm and sick that he can barely walk or feed himself, yet is so incredibly brilliant that other wizards flock to his lectures of space and time and magic, making him the Disc's analogue of Stephen Hawking.
  • Put on a Bus: Like Esk, he dropped out of sight for about thirty books, going off with Esk to engineer new forms of magic in Equal Rites. Unlike her, he doesn't actually appear in I Shall Wear Midnight, but he is mentioned.
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    Conina the Hairdresser 

Daughter of the legendary Cohen the Barbarian and one of the many temple dancers he wooed through the years. From her mother she inherited gold-tinged skin, white-blond hair, a voice that can make "Good morning" sound like an invitation to bed, and a very good figure. From her father, she inherited sinews you could moor a ship with, muscles as solid as a plank, and reflexes like a snake on a hot tin roof. She also acquired from Cohen suitable heroic instincts (that is, strong urges to fight, kill, and steal) and an ability to use anything as a deadly weapon. These traits rather get in the way of the profession she really wants to have: hairdressing. Seen in Sourcery.



  • Badass Normal: Few people imagine how deadly a comb can be before they have met Conina.
  • Barbarian Hero: A female version, and just as badass as her father, though she doesn't particularly want to be.
  • Dark-Skinned Blonde: Either she's deeply tanned or naturally dusky.
  • I Just Want to Be Normal: She'd rather work with hair.
  • In the Blood: Barbarian hero instincts, to her great displeasure.
  • No Guy Wants an Amazon: All the guys want her, until they find out that she will attack everything around her by genetic compulsion.
  • Ship Tease: With Rincewind and the implication that something might have happened if she hadn't run into Nijel.
  • World's Most Beautiful Woman: Much like Juliet, she's at least a serious contender for the title. Every male character who sees her at least comments on her beauty.

    Coin the Sourcerer 

The son of the renegade wizard Ipslore the Red, Coin is in fact Ipslore's 8th son- and since Ipslore was the 8th son of an 8th son, this made him a sourcerer. Unlike wizards, who draw on the magic around them, Coin generates his own power, making him an obscenely powerful magic user. Raised by his father's spirit bound to his staff, Coin takes over Unseen University to elevate wizards to their rightful place in the world (as seen by Ipslore), setting the plot of Sourcery



  • Abusive Parents: Isplore the Red. Despite being dead and existing only within Coin's inherited staff, he's still very capable of magically torturing Coin whenever he shows signs of reluctance.
  • Apocalypse Maiden: As an all-powerful Sourcerer with abilities that can potentially end the world, this is a given.
  • Ascended to a Higher Plane of Existence: In the end, Coin realizes that he's too powerful to live on the Disc, and instead creates his own world to live in.
  • Asskicking Equals Authority: Becomes Archchancellor by incinerating his rivals.
  • Children Are Innocent: On his own, Coin is just a confused, sheltered child. It's only from his evil father's influence that he does evil deeds.
  • Child Mage: A particularly extreme example.
  • Creepy Child: He doesn't mean to be, but a combination of unimaginable power and Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour (as demanded by Ipslore) does make him seem deeply unsettling to those around him.
  • Evil Sorcerer: Subverted. Coin's not evil, just hopelessly dominated by his father.
  • Extreme Doormat: Has elements of this; having lived his life having decisions made for him, he doesn't know how to think for himself.
  • Goo Goo Godlike: Manifested his powers during infancy; by the time he was ten years old, Coin was the most powerful force on the entire Disc.
  • Magical Eighth Son: The source of his power, as the eighth son of an eighth son of an eighth son.
  • Reality Warper: Unfortunately, this spells bad things for the Disc. Luckily, it means that he's his own Reset Button.
  • Supernatural Gold Eyes: Tellingly, they fade to their normal colour as Ipslore starts losing control over Coin.
  • Tyke Bomb: Raised to be this by his father...
    • Defusing The Tykebomb: ... but starts to change after encountering Rincewind, being intrigued by the way that Rincewind (who's no threat to him in any way, shape, or form) challenged him not with any great magical spells or artefacts, but with half a brick in a sock.
  • Wizard Duel: His way of introducing himself to the Wizards of Unseen University. It doesn't end well for his opponent.
  • "World of Cardboard" Speech: Once he's free of his father's influence, he laments to the Librarian that he still can't help warping reality for his own convenience. This leads the Librarian to advise him, "Ook"note .

     Azrael 

Azrael is one of the Old High Ones of the Universe, he's possibly the Universe itself. He is the Death of the Universe, Death of the Discworld is merely an aspect of himself as are all lesser deaths. He's only appeared in one book Reaper Men.



  • Benevolent Boss: He eventually overrules the Auditors and reinstates Death.
  • Celestial Bureaucracy: He's the ultimate Death and he outranks the Auditors of Reality.
  • Pet the Dog: Agrees with Death that the Reaper should have compassion and mercy towards the living, and gives him his job back.
  • Powers That Be: Of a variant. He's not a god, but one of the Old High Ones.
  • Secret Test of Character: It's implied that letting the Auditors fire Death was one of these.
  • Time Abyss: He's as old as the Universe himself, and he has a clock that tells Time what it is.

    Om 

Om is the god of Omnia, a state somewhere in Discworld's hot desert regions. He starred in Small Gods, and was an example of what happens to gods when people stop believing in them (even if they're still practicing the official religion). In his official form, Om is a great big mighty golden thing with horns, but he spends most of the story as a powerless, petulant, sarcastic tortoise with a lot of natural enemies (including eagles, other small gods, and his own In... uh, Exquisition), because his religion has grown so bureaucratic that he's down to his very last believer. Said believer is an initiate named Brutha, who has faith like stone and roughly the brains of one, too (which is to say, engraved stone-it's actually more challenging for him to forget things).



  • Break the Haughty: Most of the events of Small Gods, which transforms Om from a smite-happy God to a leashed, somewhat forgiving God.
  • Brought Down To Tortoise: When he loses all but one of his believers.
  • Crystal Dragon Jesus: Draws upon Judaism, Christianity, and Islam - mostly Christianity, since the events of Small Gods create a similar split to that between the Old and New Testaments.
  • Deadpan Snarker: It's just something about being a tortoise. They're naturally deadpan.
  • Gods Need Prayer Badly
    You're more afraid of him than you are of me, now. Abraxas says here: 'Around the Godde there forms a Shelle of prayers and Ceremonies and Buildings and Priestes and Authority, until at Last the Godde Dies. Ande this maye notte be noticed.'
    Om, when Brutha refuses his command(ment) to kill Vorbis
  • He Who Must Not Be Seen: More recent books imply that Om's faith has begun eclipsing the other gods' specifically because he does not manifest or provide any concrete proof of his existence, so he may actually be the most powerful god on the disc by now. (Ironically, actually utilizing any of that power would be his undoing.)
    • As revealed in Small Gods, though, the reason he didn't do it before the Brutha schism is because he was just that idle.
    • When he does make a physical appearance in the fourth Science of Discworld book as a literal Deus ex Machina, his presence is less than overwhelming, demonstrating better than ever why he does better as a silent and unseen god.
  • Historical Hero Upgrade: The Books of Om are more than a little embellished. He's remembered as having imparted commandments unto St. Ossory. All Om remembers is appearing as a pillar of fire and saying "hey, look what I can do!" And that's nothing about the parts of His words being made up by vampyres for a lark.
  • Loss of Identity: The minute he became a tortoise. He spent two horrible years thinking tortoise-y thoughts until he got close enough to Brutha to regain a bit of godhood.
  • Physical God: Unfortunately, most of said godhood didn't make the transition to corporeality.

    Brutha 

Originally a simple novice (both 'a novice who is no more than a novice' and 'a novice who is not too quick'), Brutha was The (unwitting) Chosen One of Om by the sheer virtue of being the god's one and only true believer... that is, he really believes that Om exists, and doesn't just perform rituals and recite prayers to score points). After a series of misadventures with the god (who had been turned into a tortoise), he became the Eighth Prophet of Omnianism.



  • Character Development: Starts off as innocent and unquestioning in the doctrines of his faith, but after talking to his god (he's the only one who can), studying other philosophies, and examining his religion's scriptures, he decides that his religion is not as accurate or as holy as he was once led to believe. This allows him to challenge Om and his commandments at the end of Small Gods.
  • Clap Your Hands If You Believe: The only reason why Om still has a physical form and is not just some forgotten wisp is because of Brutha's unquestioning belief in the existence of his god. When Om saves Brutha from being burned alive, the surge of belief from the audience returns Om to his full glory.
  • Gentle Giant: He's a big lump.
  • Incorruptible Pure Pureness: He's initially described as a 'big dumb ox', but then Took a Level in Badass and revolutionizes his religion into a more tolerant and less smite-happy one. He even attempts to redeem Vorbis' soul when he dies - and the tone of the scene, while ambiguous, suggests he'll probably eventually succeed.
  • Photographic Memory: Brutha's greatest ability. He can memorize entire libraries.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: After the climax of the book, it's up to him to decide how to reform Omnianism. Many members of the Church did terrible things out of a desire to conform: while punishment would be just, Brutha says he'll reform the Church 'the hard way' - not just preaching mercy, but showing it. The subsequent century under a good man of simple faith changes the followers of Om entirely.
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    71-Hour Ahmed 

D'reg and police chief of Al-Khali. Something of a Foil to Vimes.


  • Badass Normal: No powers, just a good shot, an intelligent mind, and Assassins' Guild training.
  • BFS: He carries a large curved sword on his back. It's big enough that Ahmed is practically its concealed owner.
  • Covered with Scars: He has "the most crowded face Vimes had ever seen".
  • Cowboy Cop: Much like Vimes, he trusts nobody and doesn't follow all the rules and orders exactly. Unlike Vimes, he's not quite willing to arrest the Prince. He's willing to help, though...
  • Face of a Thug: Something that aids his efforts to get people to underestimate him, with it being noted that he has a face covered in scars and a beard that looks like he was trying to eat a hedgehog. Needless to say, he's much, much smarter than he pretends to be.
  • Funny Foreigner: As a form of Obfuscating Stupidity. While actually a very intelligent foreigner, he plays up Klatchian stereotypes (i.e. offering various people camels in exchange for their wives) when in Ankh-Morpork, and Morporkian mannerisms while in Klatch, because "everyone knows foreigners are a bit stupid."
  • Good Is Not Nice: He's a chief policeman of Al-Khali, but he's very manipulative and pragmatic - which, in the latter case, often means not bothering to follow the same Thou Shalt Not Kill rule as Vimes (though as he points out, Vimes' beat is a single city, where he has plenty of back-up and a more or less functioning justice system to work with, while Ahmed is all alone in the vast desert with only sword and camel for company).
  • Majored in Western Hypocrisy: He went to the Assassins' Guild school, basically a posh British-style boarding school, which takes a lot of international students. Vimes is surprised despite himself when Ahmed mentions it. The thickly-accented Morporkian that Ahmed spoke when first introduced turns out to be just part of his act.
  • Names to Run Away from Really Fast: If you know the story behind it, his name is. Klatchian tribes are supposed to give anyone three days (72 hours) of hospitality no matter what, so the question becomes (as Vimes asks): What happened in that last hour?
  • Obfuscating Stupidity: The reason for his Funny Foreigner act.
  • Pragmatic Hero: Like Vimes, he's zealously dedicated to the pursuit of justice. Unlike him, however, he doesn't follow Thou Shalt Not Kill rule and is willing to break Sacred Hospitality. See also Shadow Archetype below.
  • Sacred Hospitality: Averted. It's a very important clue to his odd nickname, and a very good reason why you should be extremely careful around this guy.
  • Shadow Archetype: Just like Vimes, he's struggling to bring justice to a lawless region. But since he has only a sword and a camel, and hundreds of square miles to cover, he can't afford Vimes' scruples.

    Lobsang Ludd 

A foundling raised in the Guild of Thieves until a chance meeting with a history monk resulted in him being wiped from the Guild's collective memory and taken to be trained in the mountains in abilities he was only barely aware he had. However, Lobsang is apparently "a smart boy" and there's no teaching a smart boy. Compared to other characters in Thief of Time (and Pratchett characters in general), Lobsang is rather a blank slate. Of course then you discover that he's actually half of a whole person who is also the son of the personification of time and ends up becoming Time itself in the end, and suddenly he doesn't seem quite so standardised any more.



  • Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence: At the end of Thief of Time, he becomes Time's Anthropomorphic Personification.
  • Blank Slate: Suffers from "dull protagonist" syndrome until his upgrade. As the spoilered section in his summary explains, this is intentional.
  • Composite Character: Literally, In-Universe, after the Split at Birth matter is resolved ( he remains mostly Lobsang, albeit with more depth, on the grounds that Lobsang had much happier memories than Jeremy did).
  • I Just Want to Be Normal: Technically he just wants to stay partly normal, he could "just know" absolutely anything he wanted to know at any given instant because he is Time itself personified and sees all potential possibilities, but he claims he has to do things "the right way round" to stay partly human.
  • In the Blood: Son of Time. It shows.
  • Not So Different: He is described In-Universe as, in a number of ways, being a lot like Susan Sto-Helit, what with their both being too clever by half, being prone to arrogance before growing out of it (both of which Susan had grown out of by this point), and being half-human, and trying to keep as much of their humanity as they can.
  • Thieves' Guild: Was in the Guild of Thieves before he got up and taken to the monastery.
  • Split at Birth: Him and Jeremy Clockson, a socially inept and supersane (which is just as bad as being crazy) individual, are the same person, born twice because their/his/whatever mother freaked out a little bit during childbirth, and when Time herself freaks out strange things tend to happen. It comes out to the same thing in the end, and after they merge, the result is more Lobsang with more depth than a true composite - this being explained In-Universe as being because Jeremy had a pretty miserable life.

    Polly/Oliver Perks 

A young girl in the war-torn country of Borogravia, Polly Perks eventually goes against the religious abominations against women fighting and wearing men's clothing to try and find her brother, who had marched into battle a year before. Polly, as Oliver Perks, quickly grasps the basics of being a soldier, even in a motley squad consisting of two unusually close 'friends', an Igor, a troll, a vampire, a religious fanatic, a wet-behind-the-ears commander, and a legendary and mysteriously long-tenured sergeant. Oh, and Shufti too.



  • A Mother to Her Girls: Becomes this, if the epilogue is anything to go by.
  • Action Girl: She's a soldier.
  • Big Sister Instinct: She joins the army to try to find her mentally disabled brother Paul, who has been drafted.
  • Combat Pragmatist: She's fairly effective in close-quarters combat because she knows that manners are for suckers.
    • Groin Attack: How she deals with Prince Heinrich's unwanted advances, an incident that acquires international fame.
  • Knight In Sour Armor: Not as clear an example as Vimes or Granny, but she's got the beginnings of this. (Of course, war will make a cynic out of almost anyone — everybody in her regiment has means of coping, and this is hers.)
  • Meaningful Name: Very, very heavily lampshaded. It gets to the point where just implying you're thinking about possibly mentioning it annoys her.
  • Only Sane Woman: Compared to her fellow soldiers, she's a shining beacon of sanity.
  • Overshadowed by Awesome: She's a competent enough soldier, but it's hard to stand out when you're next to a troll, a vampire, and Sergeant Jackrum. She even predicts that this will happen to her in the history books, given the fact that one of her squadmates basically gets made into a minor deity's avatar.
    • Though the end of the book implies that she's becoming something of a sequel to Jackrum (she may not be quite as physically badass just yet, but on the other hand she's picked up on or two tricks about fighting a modern war...).
  • The Smart Guy: She's probably the most intelligent, and certainly the most introspective, of the recruits.
  • Sweet Polly Oliver: Lampshaded in that her real name is Polly and her male pseudonym is Oliver. She comes to regret choosing the name in the end.
  • The Watson: To various members of her regiment, but especially to Jackrum.

     Sergeant Jackrum 

Jackrum is a famous figure in the little nation of Borogravia, a career sergeant who has used every trick possible to stay in the army, serving its interests and doing what little can be done to keep the hapless recruits alive. Sergeant Jackrum is a Living Legend on both sides of the border (and in pretty much every other country nearby, come to that), but there's one little secret that Jackrum has managed to keep.



  • Becoming the Mask: When she sadly points out that she couldn't go and live with her son, who she left with her grandmother to raise, as it would horrify her son to have some "fat ol biddy banging on his back door and gobbing baccy juice all over the place and telling him she's his mum", Polly suggests that Jackrum just keep the lie she's lived going by instead claiming to be his father instead, as that kind of appearance and behavior is acceptable in a man.
  • "Blackmail" Is Such an Ugly Word: One of the reasons High Command hasn't been able to make an honorable discharge stick: Jackrum's got dirt on most of them.
  • Brawn Hilda: Self-described as being "never an oil painting", and from the kind of place where men and women alike favoured partners with the ability to do things like lift a pig under each arm, and the day after her boyfriend William went off to war, she was doing just that before she decided to join him.
  • Combat Pragmatist: Jackrum lives by the principle that dying honorably is what the enemy wants you to do: why oblige them?
  • Dirty Business: The Sergeant shows no pleasure, but no hesitation, when it comes to doing terrible things to the enemy. The implication is that the 'little lads' are being shielded from the very worst of the war.
  • Exact Words: "On my oath, I'm not a violent man!" is one of Jackrum's favourite sayings, despite deploying extreme violence against his enemies during the book. It comes off as Hypocritical Humour, but as Jackrum is actually a woman, this is technically a true statement. Polly lampshades it towards the end.
  • The Dreaded: Nobody in Borogravia or Zlobenia wants to go up against Jackrum.
  • A Father to His Men: Or so Jackrum loudly and repeatedly asserts. Actually, she's more of a Mama Bear.
  • No Indoor Voice: Comes in two flavors, Jolly Sergeant and Furious Sergeant. Neither of which is quiet.
  • Old Soldier: Has grandchildren and is still probably the most feared hand-to-hand combatant in the region.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: By Borogravian standards, which admittedly are not terribly high.
  • Sergeant Rock: To a great many officers who ended up as members of the Borogravian High Command, largely thanks to Jackrum's mentorship - which, in the process, means that Jackrum also has a lot of dirt on them.
  • Someone to Remember Him By: She gave birth to a son, William Junior, a few months after her boyfriend was killed at Sepple. She left him with her grandmother and he grew up to be a respected armorer.
  • Stout Strength: The Sergeant is obese but quite strong.
  • Sweet Polly Oliver: Surely you didn't think Polly was the first? Jackrum was so sick of the treatment she got on the family pig farm that, when her boyfriend William went off to join the army, she decided to run away and join it with him. When he got killed, she stayed on for not having anywhere else to go.

    The Amazing Maurice 

Maurice is a talking cat, with a cat's ego and self-interest, and something of a feline equivalent of Gaspode who has a softer heart than he's willing to admit even to himself. Title character of The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents.



  • Anti-Hero: He's a cat after all.
  • Balancing Death's Books: When he and Dangerous Beans were killed by Spider, he gave up one of his nine lives so that Death would spare Dangerous Beans.
  • Cats Are Mean: He believes this, but tries to subvert it whenever possible.
  • Cats Are Snarkers: This one, however, he doesn't bother to subvert.
  • Cats Have Nine Lives: He's down to six.
  • Expy: At first glance, and indeed at second glance, he can come across as one for Gaspode the Wonder Dog; Maurice's Origin Story is similar to Gaspode's second origin (normal stray animals made intelligent from exposure to magical garbage), they're both, on the whole, smarter than the humans they hang out with and use similar tactics in manipulating said humans, and they are both masters of snide and sarcastic comments. As the story goes on, however, it turns out that despite similar set-ups and many shared personality traits, the two animals are actually very different when it comes down to it — where Gaspode is ultimately a pessimist who loves to wallow in self-pity and set himself up as a tragic hero, Maurice has a more positive outlook on life and is a lot more unashamedly a self-centered Jerk with a Heart of Gold.
  • Hidden Heart of Gold: Demonstrated when saving Dangerous Beans by Balancing Death's Books with one of his nine lives. He doesn't like to let it show - after all, he does have a reputation to maintain.
  • Fake American: In the audiobook version, Stephen Briggs reads Maurice's lines in a faux-American accent, giving him a casual "used car salesman" voice.
  • Talking Animal: Thanks to eating a talking rat.
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    Glenda Sugarbean 

The head of Unseen University's Night Kitchen, a practical and down-to-earth young woman who bakes the best pies in the world. Also has repressed anger issues and a habit of unleashing it on anyone who earns her wrath, up to and including Lord Vetinari.



  • Boring, but Practical: Her approach to life. At first.
  • Girls Love Stuffed Animals: A teddy bear with three eyes, due to a sewing mishap.
  • Improbable Age: Though numbers aren't given, she's the same age as Juliet, so probably in her earlier twenties, and she's running one of the largest and best kitchens in the world.
    • The night kitchen, anyway, which is considered somewhat lower in rank, probably equivalent to what the Night Watch was to the Day Watch before the end of Men at Arms, and has far fewer staff, with its main function being to fulfil any wizardly desire for late night snacks. Plus, she is the latest in what's apparently a long line of master chefs. Vetinari considers a Sugarbean's baked goods to be worthy of note, so just being one is probably enough to scoot you to the head of the line in a kitchen.
  • Mama Bear: It runs in the family.
  • My Beloved Smother: She's not an actual mother, but she has a natural instinct to act like a loving, but controlling mother to just about everyone she meets. She's usually (but not always) smart enough to suppress this instinct when around people who are older, wiser or more powerful than she is — but she goes full-force mother hen towards Juliet, to the point where people mistake her for being Juliet's actual mother even though they're the same age.
    • It's more than hinted that she got this character trait from her own mother, and part of her Character Development is to overcome this part of herself.
  • Plucky Girl: She marches into the Patrician's Palace and harangues Vetinari. And gets away with it! Twice! And the second time he's with Lady Margolotta.
  • Supreme Chef: Vetinari himself has referred to her cooking as art.
  • Tall Poppy Syndrome: Suffered from this early on, but ultimately subverts it.
  • The Unfettered: A major part of her Character Development is realizing that all the unwritten rules of social behavior... are more "suggestions", and if you ignore them with enough confidence, people have no idea how to respond. This leads to her multiple Crowners, including when she tells off Margolotta AND stares her down. Successfully! Cause she ignored the fact that she was "supposed" to be terrified. Even Vetinari finds this hilariously awesome.
  • Younger Than They Look: Is mistaken for Juliet's mother at one point, although her attitude probably had a lot to do with it.

    Trevor "Trev" Likely 

Technically employed downstairs at Unseen University, but prefers to spend his time at football or kicking his tin can around, which he has miraculous control over. Son of legendary footballer Dave Likely.



  • Benevolent Boss: He's noted as being a decent boss - while he doesn't do much in the way of actual work, but he's kind to his subordinates, who don't need that much in the way of supervision.
  • Big Name Fan: He's not a player, but he's still well-known by the other fans. This is referred to as as being "a Face" in the story.
  • Book Dumb: Not learned or intellectual, but he has a good amount of street smarts.
  • The Charmer: Describes himself as a "Face" of the street, and is a genuinely easy-going and charming guy who knows how to get along with people and has a way with the ladies... though not with Glenda, with whom he has a history. He wanted it to be more of a geography, but she refused.
  • I Gave My Word: To his old mum not to play football.
  • Refused the Call: Repeatedly, as he promised his mum he wouldn't play after his father died playing football.
  • Roboteching: With a tin can. Ponder even pulls out a magic-meter to try to figure out how he's doing it.
    "It's all about the spin."
  • Turn Out Like His Father: Apparently, his mother was afraid he would, as she forbade him from playing football.
    • "Turn out" in this case meaning "killed whilst playing football"

    Juliet Stollop 

The Disc's first supermodel, but for dwarf fashion (she's human). Plays Juliet to Trev's Romeo with rival football teams as the feuding families.


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    Mr. Nutt 

A "goblin" employed downstairs at Unseen University at the behest of Lord Vetinari, who is keeping him safe for Lady Margolotta. A fast learner and extremely skilled and diligent at everything he does and talks even more "nobby" than the wizards upstairs.



  • Almighty Janitor: His official job title is "Candle Dribbler."
  • Awesomeness by Analysis: Pretty much his trademark; he reads books, he learns, he thinks and then he does, and most often he succeeds brilliantly.
  • Charles Atlas Superpower: Well, he spent his childhood chained to an anvil, although it seems he overestimates the extent to which his surprising strength is due to this trope.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: Perhaps best described by this exchange between him and Trev:
    Nutt: When I lived in the dark of the forge, I used to lift weights. The tongs at first, and then the little hammer and then the biggest hammer, and then one day I could lift the anvil. That was a good day. It was a little freedom.
    Trev: Why was it so important to lift the anvil?
    Nutt: I was chained to the anvil.
  • Expospeak Gag: All the time.
  • Fantastic Racism: Nobody is really very well-disposed to the poor guy. It sucks to be an orc.
  • Hyperactive Metabolism: When he got "killed" and sent to the hospital, he promptly came back to life... then was so hungry he ate all the pies Glenda left out.
  • Orc Raised by Elves: Mr. Nutt actually is an orc and was raised by humans and Friendly Neighborhood Vampires. He's a stand-up guy, although in this case, it's questionable whether orcs actually were Always Chaotic Evil to begin with.
  • Our Orcs Are Different: They're magically modified human super soldiers.
  • Raised by Wolves: He spent the first seven years of his life chained to an anvil, and after that, he was pretty much raised by books. So you can't blame him for sometimes sharing Too Much Information and using language that flies over almost everyone's heads.
  • Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: He speaks like a dictionary, to the point where most of his peers have no idea what he's talking about (and several of them think he's insulting them).
  • Sophisticated as Hell: On occasion, especially once he finally figures out Ankh Morpok's football hooligan culture.
  • Spock Speak: Since he was given a very extensive education in a lot of advanced literature, he tends to speak in this manner by default. It tends to alienate the much more straightforward and, well, lower class individuals he lives with, so he often has to repeat himself in a more "dumbed down" fashion.
  • Super Soldier: As an orc, he was created to be one. He pushes his talents in other directions, though.

    Pepe 

An incredibly campy dwarven fashion designer, and Madame Sharn's partner. Behind the camp, he's a self-described bastard and old bugger. He is not above responding to evil with knives in dark alleys where better people would stop at just words.



  • Always Camp: Though it's really an act.
  • Ambiguously Gay: It's left up to individual readers to decide whether he is a straight man whose father bullied him for his natural effeminacy or if he truly is homosexual... and then there's the incredibly complicated dwarven gender-identity issues to confuse things even more...
  • Camp Gay: He's plays up the stereotype of the "mincing, feminine, flighty, homosexual fashion designer" because it's expected.
  • Camp Straight: If you figure he really is heterosexual and merely acts so camp for much the same reason that a human weapons maker in Ankh-Morpork legally changed his name to Stronginthearm and claims to be a dwarf. Namely, it's what everyone expects and so he's playing to the stereotypes to get more business.
  • Converting for Love: To being a dwarf, which is almost like a religion.
  • Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: When he finally gets upset enough to intervene... he deals with Andy. Permanently.
  • Interspecies Romance: It's made quite blatant that he and Madame Sharn are sexually involved, so much so that Pepe "converted to being a Dwarf" to be with her.
  • Not-So-Harmless Villain: At the end of the book, when everything is said and done, except for Andy still being free and waiting to get his revenge on Nutt... Pepe jumps him in an alleyway, ambiguously blinds him (theories ranging from "cut over both eyelids to "cut out an eye"), and then tricks him into rubbing raw lemon into the wounds. Dear God.
  • Real Men Wear Pink: Yes, he's a mincing, campy, highly talented fashion designer and model-spotter. But he's also ruthless, viciously skilled with a knife, and wickedly cunning, as proven when he ambushes and mutilates Andy at the end of the book.

    Madame Sharn 

The owner of a dwarven fashion house and self-declared female dwarf. Whether or not she's actually female is anyone's guess, but then dwarfs have rather different gender roles anyway.



  • Ambiguous Gender: Calls herself Madam Sharn, wears comparatively feminine gear and uses female pronouns... but, like all female dwarves, she's got a huge bushy beard, and she acts in a lot of fairly masculine ways. It's simply impossible to tell for certain whether she's simply a female with a biologically masculine appearance trait and a personality somewhere between The Lad-ette and the Tomboy with a Girly Streak, or a somewhat haphazard male-to-female transgender. The author leaves it to the readers' imagination; the closest the text comes to an actual explanation is a "queen" pun.
  • Breast Plate: She wears one, of course, since it's expected of a female dwarf. In fact, her business is based on the idea of making these, since dwarf ladies want to be more feminine but still would never dream of simply not wearing armor.
  • Chainmail Bikini: Her business's new venture is creating these, although they're intended as underwear. The big selling point is that they've found a way to make one that doesn't chafe.
  • Depraved Homosexual: Subverted; she and Pepe come across this way (he scolds her for laying it on a bit thick), but they're actually fairly decent.
    "'A whole box of chocolates is not depraved. Besides, you slid out the card between the layers, which confused me. I did not intend to eat the bottom layer. I did not want the bottom layer. It was practically assault."
  • Drag Queen: References the trope with her attitude and apparel, but may fail on the fundamental point, since she could actually be female. This is the Discworld, and it wouldn't be the first time we've seen a female drag queen there.
  • Lady Drunk: Conducts herself in that way, although as the above tropes indicate, nobody's really sure what she actually is.
  • Victoria's Secret Compartment: Which is why she, unlike many dwarfs, likes the new paper money better than the traditional gold — the paper money is much warmer and more comfortable against her skin.
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