Warning: Spoilers Off applies to Moments pages. Proceed at your own risk.
It may not be spectacular, but it sure as hell can be hilarious.
- Plankton starts off by plotting to conquer fanfiction.net, then the world...and is interrupted by Danny, who asks why he's trying to summon the evils of the underworld in the reviewing room.
- The Danny Phantom trio's complete lack of faith in E350's ability to complete his self-imposed Halloween challenge.note
You Have Died of Dysentery
- "I can't say what would've happened if hed lived. Maybe he would've made it the first thousand miles. All I know is that I owe Squidward twenty bucks, as Patrick did, in fact, die first."
- Squidward gets the measles, and Mr. Krabs refuses to stop traveling so he can get better. Eight days later, he gets better, tells everyone...and Mr. Krabs tells him that he should've told them earlier, because they would have stopped.
- The wagon keeps breaking. Mr. Krabs reveals that he got it for fifty cents.
- "Yay! Stopping in the middle of a snowy, freezing mountain range cured your fever!"
- "Spongebob and Bambi had an epic fight for Sandy's freedom. Okay, not really."
- Spongebob and Sandy are the only ones who make it through the journey alive. After pondering what to do
INSERT SHIPPING HERE
The Haunted Scam
- E350 gets a call from someone who accidentally dialed his number while trying to reach the Ghostbusters. E350 is ready to hang up on them...until they mention they're going to be paying $200 to remove the problem. Cue the titular scam.
- "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night, just like every other haunted house story ever."
- E350 declares Timmy the "canary" of his team.Timmy: "Canary"?
E350: We send you in first, and if you die we know the room is dangerous.
Timmy: Gee, thanks.
- Bloo shows up for an obligatory cameo (and to blackmail E350 into giving him money).
- Witch Ember claims that she's going after E350 and his friends for revenge...only to fail to come up with an answer when Spongebob asks "Revenge for what?"
- E350 was apparently looking after an Energon-Manipulation Ray Gun, an Andalite Morphing Cube, and a particle beam for a friend. He fails to bring this up until after he, Spongebob, and Sandy have run from Witch Ember and barricaded themselves.
- Linkara makes a cameo purchasing and eating sherbert...before witnessing the gang's battle against Witch Ember."I...dont think this is sherbert."
The Unspectacular Filler
- E350, suffering writer's block, tries to find some value out of it being the tenth day of the tenth month of 2010. He fails.
- E350's utterly nonchalant reaction to being yelled at through the phone by Harbinger, punched by Bender, and threatened by Cybermen.
- Happy that his conversation with Timmy has led to a story for the tenth, E350 closes the document and sighs in relief. Timmy then asks if he remembered to save.
In Witch I Make A Witty Pun
- The title.
- E350 somehow runs out of ammo when he's using a particle beam.
- (INSERT BENNY HILL THEME HERE)
- E350's reaction to Witch Ember pulling a Master?
The Battle of my Front Lawn
- E350 getting humored by emergency services.
- The Rocket Car.Linkara: This doesnt make any physical sense!
E350: It's the Rocket Car. It doesnt need to make sense!
- Everyone's reactions when they realize Zim is their last hope.
- After Sandy is turned into a stuffed animal, E350 makes a joke about how theyre "stuffed".
And Now For Something Completely Different
- The Fiddley Thing makes its first appearance.
- Chester is more concerned about his ability to play the harmonica than the fact that he turned into a Pokémon expy.
- After everything he does, it's smoking that gets Insano kicked off the bus. Squidward gets kicked off with him for no reason whatsoever.
Top 6 Why? Moments in History
- Nostalgia Critic pulling a Not Now, Kiddo on Jimmy Neutron.
An Open Letter to Deviantart
- E350 shows Timmy a picture that he found. When he informs the kid that it's a picture of Vicky, Timmy punches him in the face and leaves.
- Sandy goes after E350 for repeatedly turning her into a robot in his stories.
Squidward Riffs Again
- Squidward assumes the title of the fic he's reading (Insane, Alone) refers to E350's mental health and marital status.
Dr. Insano VS New South Wales
- The bartender is unable to understand that Squidward doesn't drink beer.
- The Giant Death Wallaby.
- Vlad facepalming when more and more people come to his Australian villa in increasingly chaotic ways.
- E350 once again has a convenient weapon on him (this being a flash-bang grenade).
- Zim's reaction to being alone against ReGenesis
- When the copy of Halloween Unspectacular 1 reaches Sydney, it utterly wrecks the city but has no notable effect on the train service.
- E350 is completely unaware that he may have destroyed civilization as we know it.
Happy Fun-times with the King of the Dead
- The explanation as to why Timmy and Spongebob are in a graveyard.
- Timmy is concerned about the Underworld King
because he could tell AJ and Chester their plans.The Underworld King: (Face Palm) Humans are still brick-dumb, I see.
- The convenient note revealing how one can reseal the Underworld King back in his bottle.
The Fiddley Thing Returns
- Insano made upgrades to the Fiddley Thing. He goes to Sandy so that she can fix it...not to detransform everyone he'd tested it on, but to reset it because he liked the old version better (it had more robots).
- Whatever the Fiddley Thing did when Sandy accidentally hit a button on it.
- All of the potions lead to hilarious moments.
Timmy: I don't think he's coming back.
- Sheen drinks one that makes his entire body invisible...except his clothes. He starts to take them off, only to be dissuaded by the other players.
- Timmy shrinks down to a foot tall and curses Jimmy.
- Jimmy becomes more energetic and rushes to his lab to invent something.
- Spongebob drinks his potion and nothing happens. He puts it on the table...only for it to smash through the table and shatter on the floor. The group unanimously decides to blame Jimmy.
- Sandy is turned into a six-inch tall pixie.
- The ending:
- Ember, Squidward, Timmy, and Sandy are trapped in a room reading the tropes page for Deadly Mistakes. Hilarity Ensues.
- Timmy's comments on the various cool names the characters have.
- Timmy saying that "it's not impressive unless youve gone for three parents", then asking why Sandy thought he was innocent.
- E350 was Genre Savvy enough to flee across the border and leave Dib in his place.
Montage of Doom
- Spongebob invokes a montage in order to save time gathering the things he needs to seal away the Underworld King.
- Spongebob catches Dash Baxter reading Voltaire.
- The Underworld King decides not to curse Squidward, seeing as living with Patrick is probably enough of a curse on its own.
- GIR as Hamlet. Yes, really. His dad is Rainbow Dash.
- Lancer, after reading the parody, pulls a machine gun out from under his desk and tells his class that whoever brings him the head of the writer will be exempt from homework for the rest of the year.Hell hath no fury like an English teacher scorned.
Night of the Mutated Nerds
- Simmonds and David refuse to believe Spongebob about the Underworld King...until they notice the red mist blanketing the town, the purple, rainy sky, and the full moon. Even then, their reactions are incredibly deadpan.
- "Hi, Spongebob! Im a cyclops!"
Insano Rides Again
- The bus driver from Sydney becomes a train guard...and then finds out he has Insano as a passenger again.
- The battle of the mad scientists.
- "Several hours later, the train finally returned to stable reality, and Insano, Richtofen, and Squidward were unceremoniously thrown off."
The Fright Begins
- Possessed!Danny is unable to answer Spongebobs question about what a Phantom of the Opera does.
- Here Lies Squidward's Hopes and Dreams
- Spongebob is saved through the power of horrible driving skills.
- In the end, no one wins the bet Timmy, AJ, and Chester made.
- A French café owner stops the rampage of the Eldritch Abomination that is the print copy of Halloween Unspectacular 2...by yelling at it for disturbing his customers.
How To Write Danny Phantom Fic
- The whole thing, from encouraging writers to use Character Derailment to demonizing Jack Fenton.
- The guide to handling reviews:"lol luv it soooooooo much rite more ok xxx ooo" GOOD REVIEW
"I think it needs moar sex plz" CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM
"This is an okay first effort, but theres a lot you need to improve on and heres what " FLAME
"Hello i am the king of Nigeria and i like you please give me your bank details and i will give you a million billion dollars." SEEMS LEGIT
- Timmy notes that E350 has done at least half the stuff he made fun of.
- Spongebob claims his exposition is for the benefit of "the readers". Turns out he meant Mr. and Mrs. Reader, who realize they took the wrong bus.
- Timmy spends most of the chapter with his head grafted onto Dani's body.
- Sandy's attempts to disprove Madame Athena's magic end with her head on Jazz's body and Spongebob with five bucks in his pocket.
- Sandy's guesses as to why Dr. Insano is at her house are that he wants the Fiddley Thing back, he wants to use Spongebob as a test subject, and he wants to know the meaning of "American Pie".
- Spongebob and Sandy realize that the Fiddley Thing is officially theirs now. One Gilligan Cut later, and Squidward walks in on a line of square-dancing Sandy duplicates using Spongebob as a disco ball."Well Squiddy, you finally cracked. I'm going home and crying myself to sleep."
- Sandy popping up on Danny's computer and chuckling at the ceiling cat picture he saved.
- "Jimmy was standing innocently beneath the screen, on which an angry, green, bizarrely tall and strangely proportioned squirrel was shouting angrily in Portuguese from her mouth, which was now on her stomach."
- The former bus driver and train guard shows up again, this time as airport security. He gets his mind wiped by the MiB for his troubles.
Thomas Something Something
- The whole thing is a parody of the oversaturation Thomas the Tank Engine has gotten in recent years.
- Anyone with a complaint is ignored. And anyone who is concerned. And everyone who tries to talk to Thomas while he delivers the rubber duckies.
- "Ram The Heavy Dangerous Expensive Machinery At Each Other".
My Brother Will Kill Me For This
- Plankton is the Only Sane Man of the villains; Crocker's wearing an outfit that shows off his unflattering physique, and Calamitous is making a monster in an oven.
- Jimmy's head is stuck in a tube, which doesn't get explained.
- When transforming, everyone has to say a Catchphrase; Sam gets "QUOTH THE RAVEN!" and Timmy gets "INTERNET!"
- "Yes, after thirty-six weeks, we have finally completed this new apartment building. We have built it from the finest materials, and we are sure it will last as long as our residents live...aaaaaaaaaaaaand it just got destroyed by a giant robot. Well, I hope you were all insured "
- Timmy idly wishes that the gang had a book on magicians. Cosmo and Wanda happily oblige.
- Most of the going-ons at the Unidentified Flying Con, really:
- After eating some potentially sentient donuts, Timmy and his fairies get their cosplay on. Cosmo and Wanda choose to go as each other, making Timmy want to scrub his brain out.
- Danny and his friends watch a line of fire-breathing Ukrainian square dancers, accidentally let some baby echidnas loose, and attack a man who claims that Weird Al is overrated.
- Sheen and Carl discuss Ultralord season 23,947.
- Ember somehow gets another head, and the two argue over music.
- Jimmy buys cookies from Technus to support the Evil Orphan Foundation, with E350 showing up to tell everyone to call them "biscuits" as long as it annoys his brother.
- Sandy is talking backwards for some reason.
An Open Letter to Deviantart - Two Years On
- Nazi slash exists.
- E350s frustration over real-life events being used as an excuse to ship Axis Powers Hetalia characters.
- E350 tells Timmy to bring him a literal soapbox to stand on before he goes into a rant on Double Standard.
But Then There Were Robots
- Dr. Membrane's utter obliviousness concerning the fact that his daughter has become a robot.
- Robot!Patrick suffers from Artificial Stupidity.
- E350 teasing the readers with an offscreen Sandy vs Ember Cat Fight.
- Dr. Calamitous' plan for the robots? Sell them!
- Dr. Insano playing "Ride of the Valkyries" on all the radios in the area and saving the gang in a flying house. Doubles as a moment of awesome.
- Apparently, the center of the universe is in Milton Keynes. Not even Dr. Insano is crazy enough to go there.
- E350 refuses to recreate the ending of Mass Effect 3, despite how much work everyone else has put into it.
Lunchtime at the Tyrant's Arms
- Roy Cohn admits that he's probably here for an Evil Lawyer Joke.
- "So we're not gonna be three-dimensional villains, are we?"
- Danny and Jimmy don't consider the historical bad guys much of a threat.
The Terror of the Police Auction
- In order to get the funds for a new break room, the police auction off an evil wizard's possessions. Hilarity Ensues as each potential buyer tries out a cursed object.
- Dash and Kwan try out a toaster. The toaster houses an evil spirit called the Breadlord, who slightly burns the toast. Dash runs screaming and crying; Kwan still makes plans to buy it.
- Spongebob and Patrick find a cursed camera. Spongebob has to remind Patrick what happened the last time Patrick found a cursed object: Squidward had to become a priest so he could get exorcized.
- Homer Simpson looks into a pair of cursed binoculars and sees an empty beer bottle and a cracked TV.
- Timmy, Jimmy, and Dani (who were trying to prevent some items from falling into the wrong hands) meet up later to see what they got. As it turns out, Timmy could only afford some budgie smugglers (Father's Day present, don't ask), the Necronomicon went to Ralph Wiggum, and Sam got the wizard's spellbook...which she uses to shoot Paulina into space.
The Fiddley Thing Again Returns
- Danny refuses to find a substitute of himself so he can go to ComicCon, and shoots down Tucker's idea to use the Fiddley Thing to let people become him for cash.
- Jimmy expositing what happened in the last Unspectacular to Carl.
- Sandy is about as agreeable towards Tucker and Danis plan (which has switched to finding someone to replace Dani) as Danny was.
- When Sandy asks if anyone else is gonna barge in uninvited, Ember comes in, looking for Danny.
- Dani steals the Fiddley Thing and accidentally activates it. Jimmy, Timmy, and Carl watch what happens.The three were watching Tucker trying desperately and futilely to escape up the tree from a suddenly ghost-empowered Sandy, now dressed in Dani's jumpsuit and ponytail. Below them, Dani, Spongebob, and Ember were playing "go fish" with a gremlin and an anthropomorphic toaster. Outside, Bikini Bottoms skyline was mirrored by an identical seafloor below.
- Various fictional characters are given the infamous final choice from Mass Effect 3. Results vary:
- Danny snarks at the machine and refuses to pick any of the choices, causing the Catalyst to Rage Quit.
- Nostalgia Critic rants at the Catalyst for a while.
- Homer Simpson barely listens, then tries to strangle the Catalyst.
- Timmy picks the "destroy all synthetics and AIs" option because explosions.
- Jenny picks all three options, breaking reality and stranding her in a white void with two clones of herself.
- Dr. Insano picks the "control the Reapers" option. The Catalyst regrets everything.
- Sandy questions the AI's intelligence, and then just decides to destroy the whole thing after the Catalyst trolls her.
- Charles Darwin looks at the "merge DNA" option and points out that evolution doesnt work that way.
- The Ninth Doctor shuts off the Reapers and tells the Catalyst that they don't deserve to be stopped by Ten.
- Tali deletes the AI and gets to work hacking the place.
The Quest for ComicCon
- E350 summarizes what happened last time and claims that this story will be focused on Tucker and Dani's continued attempts to find someone to replace the latter...until he gets a call, telling him that Jenny volunteered.
- Mr. Turner gets to drive the gang to ComicCon. His sense of direction is terrible; first they end up in Chicago, then Milwaukee, then Linkaras place, then Canada, then North Dakota, then Mount Rushmore, the literal middle of nowhere, Salt Lake City, a gas station in Nevada (twice), Las Vegas, and finally Mexico, at which point Ember forcibly takes over driving.
- Superintendent Chalmers comes to inspect Stanhope Municipal K-12, College, University, and DMV Superschool, which Skinner is in charge of. The first thing he sees is a school bus lodged in the computer lab window (Patrick was asked to drive, for some reason). It all goes downhill from there:
- The first teacher Chalmers meets is Crocker. The second he mentions fairies, Crocker goes ballistic.
- Richtofen is the biology teacher. He plans on having the class dissect Zoidberg, who volunteered. This...does not go over well.
- For some reason, the Political Science room is completely empty.
- E350 is teaching history. He's kind of biased.
- Lunch is literally labeled "schlock". Skulker hunted it, apparently, and is furious when Milhouse asks for something else.
- Mrs. Puff runs the driving class, and asks Chalmers to pick a student to demonstrate her class. Chalmers picks Spongebob.
- Mr. Lancer refuses to talk about the photos he uses as teaching aids.
- Apparently, Skinner's mom bugs his sandwiches.
- Something explodes in the science lab, and Bart is initially held responsible...except it was Sheen who did it, wanting to recreate something from Ultralord. As he knew what he was doing (and what was going to happen), he gets extra credit and a detention.
- Ralph ends up driving a school bus, into the third-story detention room at the end.
The Day that Shepard Died
- Realizing that his poem was a bit too grim for a humor day, E350 tries to put a joke at the end. He comes up with "random robot transformation", only for Sandy to shoot him down.
The Path of the Orinoco
- Jazz and Athena's only hope to deal with the villain alliance? Dr. Insano.
Attack of the Cons
- Paulina gets dragged off by an angry mob after they mishear E350 calling her a Witch with a Capital "B".
- When Sandy asks why theyre at a panel for a less-than-promising game, Spongebob claims it was either that or the Valve panel.
- Ember and Sandy accidentally get fused into one being (dubbed "Samber" by Spongebob).
- Apparently, Steven Spielberg got a live dinosaur for the Jurassic Park booth.
The Calm Before the Storm
- The former bus drive, train guard, and airport security man is now renting boats on the Orinoco. Naturally, Dr. Insano needs one.
A Regal Intermission
- Or, the chapter where E350 sums up every monarch of Great Britain, with much sarcasm and quipping. Yeah.
- After all the destruction previous print copies of Halloween Unspectacular have caused, the world's governments spent billions on a defense plan for this year. Except E350 bought a printer, rendering the whole thing pointless.
The Muffin Man
- "Now, now. Let's not put down other peoples opinions, even if they are demonstrably wrong."
- Gaz eats a muffin that will get her exactly what she deserves. The next thing she knows, she's being carted away by the MiB.
The Piccadilly Caper
- Jazz questions why the police are so willing to accept the existence of magic. The response she gets is "Ma'am, this is London".
Wild Mass Guessing
- E350s entire conspiracy theory, from the redheaded clones engineered by Madame Foster for a laugh to the Peanut Wars.
A Mile in My Socks
- Dipper's reaction to switching bodies with Wendy isn't complete panic, just a remark of "Not again!"
The Plot Thickens
- Timmy claims he was sleeping while the murder happened. Mr. Turner reveals that he was actually listening to Enya music.
- Stan is innocent of the crime...because he was busy committing a different crime.
Hey Fiddle Fiddle
- Spongebob and Plankton laugh off the idea that something weird might be happening...even when evidence says otherwise.
- Sandy uses the Fiddley Thing to make her house futuristic. Of course, everything is chrome in the future...
If the Sock Fits
- Mabel is more concerned over Dipper's grammar than the fact that he and Wendy swapped bodies.
- Grunkle Stan and Mr. Krabs team up to rip people off.
- Danny tells Cindy to distract Jimmy, and in exchange Timmy will shout her at the Candy bar for a year. Timmy, writhing on the floor after Cindy punched him, does not get a say in it.
- Dipper in Wendy's body has to deal with Robbie flirting with him.
- Plankton cackles about how he'll soon be in Mr. Krabs' body, then realizes how that sounded.
The Inspection II: Inspect Harder
- This time, Chalmers has to oversee Stanhope's attempt to hold a fete. As you can guess, this goes downhill quickly.
- Apparently the last school to hold a fete went down in flames. As a result, Skinner treats this occasion seriously.
- Crocker is put on bag check. Chalmers soon realizes that this was a horrible idea.
- Apparently, Richtofen taught his class how to make Mix-and-Match Critters. Reactions vary from "We were wrong to play God" to "I want one!".
- The fete has go-kart, which Spongebob gives a try. By the time he's done, the DMV section of the school looks like a bomb went off there.
- Apparently, Darth Vader is the director of the school board.
- The swap meet has a man selling wet blankets and Mr. Burns selling objects of the dark arts.
- 35 people have been sent to the nurses office as a result of the fete. Much to Chalmers' dismay, they sing about it.
- Just like the one on British monarchs, E350 describes each American president with wit and sarcasm.
The Other Sock Drops
- The security guard seems a little too eager to beat up Robbie...
- Planktons plan is foiled because the socks are bigger than his body.
Conquestio De Re Fiddley
- The Fiddley Thing is getting a burial...on the moon.
- The montage of things the characters did with the Fiddley Thing.
- The former bus driver is now unemployed and in therapy. He still shows up for the Fiddley Thing's funeral, though.
For Want of a Bit
- Timmy's snark in general.
- Every time someone says "The Haunted GameBoy", lightning strikes.
- Danny and Jimmy's utter nonchalance at the fact that they're stuck in a game.
Everyone Comes Together
- Stan initially cares more about the Mystery Shack being closed than the end of the world.
- Guinevere declares Danny, Timmy, Dani, the Pines family, Spongebob, Sandy, and Tammy the new Knights of the Round Table. Stan immediately declares that they're dead.
Let Battle Be Joined
- Athena drains a glass of wine after hearing Cochrane's plan, which involves packing a ship with barrels of gunpowder and ramming.
An Open Letter to Deviantart: Parting Words
- As an explanation to why he's rebooting the series, E350 blames imps who leave anonymous reviews on stories.
- E350 sings a parody of "I'll Make a Man Out of You" about writing terrible fanfiction.
The Calamiturian Candidate
- How does Calamitous make a presidential candidate? He combines a vat of generic green liquid, two locks of hair from "distinct human beings" (and a third one from an Oompa-Loompa), a vat-cloned human brain, a vat-cloned rat brain, an Oxford dictionary (which they don't have, so they throw in The Collected Works of Augusto Pinochet instead), a VHS tape on commiting fraud, manufactured patriotism (the author tells the reader to imagine them throwing in pictures of the reader's least favorite candidate), a Chemical X knockoff dubbed Chemical Y, a book on ethics and human decency (which they skip, as said book was lent to Preston Northwest...who used it as firewood), and "the spark of human intelligence" (a lightbulb which fizzles out before they throw it in).
- The candidate holds the crowd in his sway, even as he's turning into an Eldritch Abomination.
- Madonna's "Material Girl" starts playing on someone's phone right after the resident superheroes started chasing after the candidate-turned-eldritch horror.
The Hanging Tree
- Several guardsmen go after Lapis Lazuli, declaring that she's the weakest one. She happens to be standing near the prison's water tanks. Guess what happens next.
- Rick insists that the amount of violence against the racist slavers was completely justified.
Genies are Jerks
- The opening tries to make the argument that all genies are jerks.
- Desiree is defeated by the power of run-on sentences.
- How did Lapis know what to do? She read the owner's manual that came with the lamp.
Twenty Terrible Theories
- Why doesnt E350 have a full story out today? He's writing a 3500-word dissertation to Telltale on why Bruce Wayne should be able to make out with Harvey Dent.
- The theories:
- Jimmy believes that the fairies of Fairy World are descended from extraordinarily advanced aliens.
- Dib believes that a government conspiracy is covering everything weird up. This theory goes on until Timmy drags him away.
- Wendy, Thompson, and Robbie all believe that Tambry's a robot.
- Chester believes that Tucker and AJ are distantly related.
- Patrick starts to say "It was All Just a Dream", only to get punched offscreen.
- Sam claims that the Box Ghost is behind everything. Then she starts laughing.
- McGucket believes raccoons are spying on him.
- Ronaldo believes that Rose Quartz is Pink Diamond; E350 demonstrates his exasperation towards this theory.note
- Grenda believes that Ducktective marries the Inspector, despite the fact that he ends up with Fowlette in the finale.
- Tucker believes that Civil War II is a hot-dog dream.
- Peridot believes that Paulette from Camp Pining Hearts dies. And was responsible for Civil War II.
- Soos believes his dad will come back...so that Mr. Pines can punch him in the face.
- Spongebob believes Mr. Krabs will give him a raise. Mr. Krabs yells "NEVER!" from somewhere outside the building the theories are being recorded at.
- Dani believes Funko Pops steal the souls of their owners, and there's a conspiracy preventing people from getting the ones they want.
- Sheen believes that Ultralord is real.
- Sandy is caught off-guard, then says that maybe Dumbledore made up the prophecy to motivate Harry.
- Tambry...reveals that she IS a robot. Or she just has Eye Beams.
Choose Your Own Ending
- Its a parody of Choose Your Own Adventure books, but it only shows the endings. Including:
- You get killed and eaten trying to fight the bunyip. Your brother claims your stuff.
- An alien is defeated because The Internet Is for Porn.
- "They all turned out to be dogs or something."
- The Crystal Gems fight Nazis, with Garnet getting to punch Hitler.
- E350's car is taken by Rule 63 versions of himself and Timmy.
- You somehow end up in the Yangtze River.
- Jimmy, Carl, and Sheen are stranded in the sentient T-shirt dimension.
- E350 ends the 'shot after realizing he won't be able to top the ending where everyone constantly ages back and forth within seconds.
The Prime Ministers
- Britains various Prime Ministers are getting the snark treatment this time. You know how this goes...
Send In The Clowns
- When E350 starts panicking, Timmy asks if he betrayed the mafia again.
- Creepy clowns are Serious Business. So are fluffy cats.
- When Sideshow Bob starts talking about his plot (with mild Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness), Timmy interrupts and asks if it's a revenge scheme.
- The group decides to ignore the clown gang war in favor of 1970s Soviet Monopoly.
- "It", for the record, is the Fiddley Thing, which Dr. Insano recreated and promptly lost in a dimensional sinkhole.
- Amethyst and Peridot get it, and teleport to various alternate dimensions:
- The first is one where everything is the same...except Grunkle Stan is Lapis. When Peridot calls him a hideous, wrinkled creature, he points out how he's called "Hunkle Stan", in various internet communities.
- Then they end up in a dimension where Bill Cipher won, commenting that it looks like a heavy metal album cover.
- Next is "The Universe That Is Currently Being Sued By George Miller".
- Then there's the universe where everyone speaks in badly-translated French.
- Next is a universe where Peridot and Amethyst are giant-sized. They immediately get attacked by fighter planes.
- They end up in a universe where everyone is disproportionately punished for bad karma. Gaz is forced to Walk the Earth for being mean to Dib, and Peridot almost gets squashed by a meteor for finding her situation humorous.
- Finally, they end up in a universe where Bill Cipher watches everything that happens with popcorn.
- Lapis messes with the Fiddley Thing and mutes the world around her. She then tells Amethyst and Peridot that they can have it back in an hour and enjoys her newfound silence.
Choose Your Own Ending II: End Harder
- Yet another Choose Your Own Ending parody. Endings include:
- Batman refusing to accept Mabel Pines' methods for reforming criminals, believing she has an ulterior motive.
- "The Butler Did It. In retrospect, you really shouldnt have been surprised."
- Jimmy and Cindy nope out of exploring a mysterious time portal.
- "As Henry the Eighth performs his judo slam on you, you realise youd always known that it would all end that way."
- One pokes fun at how the ritual circle from Gravity Falls was a complete bust.
- Tucker outs Sam as a pegasister.
- Desiree cites Deviantart as a reason to hate humanity.
- Markiplier interviews Soos to see whether he'd be fit for a security job at Freddy Fazbear's, poking fun at the Fridge Logic present in the games.
- Apparently, Fazbear restaurants around the country are being shut down due to things like "OSHA violations", "cadavers found on premises", "FBI raids", and "the Avengers came in and beat all the animatronics up and shut the place down".
- Zoidberg tries to Jump Scare the reader. It doesnt really work in text format.
- Danny discusses how Inside Out is the most existentially terrifying Pixar film ever made with Valerie.
- Valerie tells Danny to hit her if she's ever in a pointless and unnecessary sequel. Seconds later, she's whacked in the head by a large breadstick.
- Apparently, Danny's head is inhabited by tiny people who look like Dani and Timmy.
- Whats Professor Membrane's response to a hole in his daughter's bedroom? Home renovations...with SCIENCE!
- The agents torture Gaz with an LED light.
- Once she finally "talks", the agents believe that the name of Gaz's true species sounds like a bunch of swear words strung together and the name of her home planet is OUTTOMAROOM.
- "Chloroform and mind wipe?" "Chloroform and mind wipe."
The Chaotic Overture
- When the Gems are making a plan to save the president, they realize that they need a portal. Peridot snaps the a portal isn't just going to appear out of nowhere. Cue portal from Jimmy's lab.
- Soos geeking out over Ant-Man.
- The airship captain is ready to take on Lapis Lazuli. There is a fountain underneath the airship.
- "Kamala Khan turned towards the situation room door. She found an anthropomorphic squirrel, a sponge, two short women who were green and purple, respectively, a teenager with a gem in the place of their belly button, and a small girl in a sweater. Part of her told her that she really shouldn't consider this as normal as she did."
- The President agreeing with Kamala when she calls Spongebob adorable.
- The Stinger, with Insano still trying to retrieve his new Fiddley Thing from the dimensional sinkhole.
- E350 is paid to continue the Halloween Unspectacular. His payment? A full collection of Rick and Morty Funko Pops.
- This time, the song parodied is "The Candy Man", with E350 and his associates throwing fanfic into a crowd of people.
- Why is the mechanical dinosaur advancing towards Sydney considered weird? Because usually this sort of thing happens in Tokyo.
- Admiral Stereotype in general.
- Ford makes a machine that turns humans into giant robots because of Rule of Cool.
- "Igor! Pull the lever!" "You call me Igor one more time, Ford, and I swear "
- Apparently, Pearl can whip up a giant robot in five minutes.
- The Danny Phantom crew acting apathetic towards the giant robot battle.
- Why is Mecha-Godragontron attacking Sydney? So that Mothravoltron Prime will notice him.
- The epilogue: Admiral Stereotype is fired and court-martialled, Ford is forgiven for not making a way to reverse the transforming process (because objectively, he's made worse mistakes), and the author makes an Oliver Cromwell joke, among other things.
Angry Fandom Shelter
- Why isn't Bill talking with other villains instead of bugging E350? Because he thinks Vlad's creepy. He's also upset that people on Tumblr seemed to blame everyone except him for Weirdmageddon.
- Steven, unable to convince his friends not to openly attack the angry mob, sighs and joins them.
Timmy Turner's House of Terror
- Among the reasons given to get the ghosts out of Timmy's house fast is "it'll nuke Dimmsdale's TripAdvisor rating".
- Danny would like to point out that he doesn't name his family's equipment, his parents do. Which is why he gets to say things like "three Jacks a second."
- Lizzie repeatedly uses synonyms to express how dumb Timmy is, until he tells her to cut it out.
Scenes from the Gems at Disneyland
- The Crystal Gems get banned from Disneyland after they try to save it from the Rubies. Highlights include:
- The Rubies managed to Totem Pole Trench their way into the park.
- Steven and Amethyst, as Smoky Quartz, fight off Army and Eyeball with bad puns. Cosmo heckles them, despite the fact theyre saving his life.
- Pearl admits they caused some minor damage to the Sleeping Beauty castle. "Minor damage" meaning "collapsed much of the front". The Gems reassure security that Greg will pay for it.
- Doc is in the "It's A Small World" ride. Surprisingly, the Gems didn't damage this ride (as Doc was already incapacitated); instead, Dipper and Wendy do, waging war on the animatronics.
- Pearl also admits that they did some "minor damage" to Main Street when taking down the Rubies' ship. "Minor damage", in this case, meaning "turned into a smoking ruin".
- Danny and Sam think the whole battle was a really elaborate Disney show.
- Apparently, criminals have stolen America's strategic reserve of donuts and coffee. Policemen all across America are dying!
- Vicky kidnaps a mannequin of Warren G. Harding.
- Dani concedes that the name "Operation Insanity" is pretty fitting.
- Dipper asks why one scene has him and Mabel doing a car chase on the side of the Sears Tower. Mabel replies with "Because its visually stunning!"
- Steven tells Connie that they need to re-open the issue of him going to Homeworld to pad the runtime.
- Dipper realizes he has a romantic arc with a hologram. He later concludes that it works better if you're Ryan Gosling.
- Damon admits they added the "one of you is a traitor" line to the trailer to mislead people.
- Love conquers everything except giant space lizards.
E350 Presents: The Tale of Bluebeard
- St. Whatever's Home is home to destitute orphaned women, who people felt sympathy for, and destitute marines, who people didn't.
- The narrator compares Bluebeard gaining feelings for Tambry to one seeing a Funko Pop they really wanted.
- After Bluebeard tells her not to, Tambry immediately makes plans to go into his creepy basement.
- Tambry prays for a Deus ex Machina to save her. She gets one, fortunately.
- Obligatory Redcoat Appearance.
- As Bluebeard lays dying, he says his only regret is not getting to eat Tambry's liver. Upon hearing this, the Marines shoot him again. He admits he deserves it.
- On of the Marines mentions that Bluebeard was selling meat to the barracks. He decides not to think about it too hard.
A Sunday Drive Down Fury Road
- E350 is apparently "banned from every settlement until Seymour".
- E350 puts on OutKasts "Hey Yeah!" for music until Sandy chucks the CD out the window.
- Yobbo Pirates!
- Why do the Yobbos attack E350 and crew? They dont have beer.
- Dib announcing that hell finally prove himself as an expert fighter before getting backhanded and sent flying.
- Giant robot Ned Kelly!
- The nameless pilot gives his life so that the significant characters can live.
- The narrator being confused by a Rod Serling opening narration.
- The weirdly specific ketchup message the Brainwashed and Crazy heroes leave.
- Chester and AJ's commentary.
- E350 apparently asked Floyd if he was an evil sorcerer before renting out his guest room to him.
- Floyd lies to E350 in a montage!
The Reference Job
- Everyone's annoyance with Allsworthy's constant pop-culture references.
- The Northwests want to be a part of Allsworthys scheme, no matter how much the receptionist denies that he's evil
Adapt or Perish
- When MPs turn up at Mr. Pines' door demanding him to hand over an interdimensional fugitive, he's not terribly fazed, realizing they probably mean Stan. And, as it turns out, they weren't even after Stan to begin with.
- Wendy's dad thinks SHIELD faked the moon landings with Stanley Kubrick. According to the agent she's talking to, that would have been too expensive.
Intermission B: Fiddle Me This
- Amethyst and Peridot turn the world into a parody of cheesy old superhero cartoons with the Fiddley Thing. Highlights include:
- Robbie, leading a gang of goths, has to tell a visigoth that they arent that kind of goth.
- Mr. Turner in a catsuit. Timmy leaves to wash his eyes.
- Bill Cipher claiming that he's not OP.
- Spongebob wonders why the more powerful Sandy is the sidekick. Sandy thinks that it's because of misogyny in the industry.
- Stan (as a Dr. Manhattan expy, complete with lack of pants), accidentally murdering criminals by sneezing.
- The hatted man whom E350 meets with at the start of the story refuses to consider Children of Earth as canon to Torchwood.
- As Danny and Timmy are wondering what song parody E350 is going to open with this year, he suddenly drives through the wall in a 1920's car. Then he launches into a parody of "Puttin' on the Ritz".
Danny: Oh no.
- Danny's reaction:
E350: Oh yes.
- It's noted that far more people emerge out of the car than should be possible.
- Peridot goes into a tap dance routine at one point, with E350 saying that if anyone is recording it, he's going to claim it's him. Jimmy points out that no one will buy that, which he admits.
- Danny asks E350 if he can go one month without making something horrible happen to him; E350 refuses to promise him anything.
The Horrible Headcase
- Ford says that they'll have to go on an arduous quest to find the titular villain, only to be interrupted by Dipper revealing that the Headcase left his card behind.
- When Ford, Dipper, and Wendy arrive at the Headcase's office building (which apparently popped up overnight), there's some Dramatic Thunder. Wendy promptly points out that it's sunny out, so where did the lightning come from?
- The Headcase's head collection includes Jimmy Hoffa.
- When Preston Northwest is revealed as the Headcase's current employer, Dipper says he should left the man frozen under Bill Cipher's butt. Then he pauses to wonder in Bill even had a butt, which Ford says is a question he doesn't need answered.
- "Disney lawyers, eat your hearts out." (Especially funny since Preston himself is owned by Disney.)
- The epic battle with the Horrible Headcase lasts three minutes.
- Pacifica's reaction to seeing that the rest of the Mystery Shack crew now all have the wrong heads is to immediately turn on her heel and walk away without a word.
The People vs. Frederick Showenhower
- Toby Determined believes Freakshow sounds innocent...after he threatens another reporter.
- Freakshow's gang consists of Lydia, Finbarr Calamitous, Man Ray, and...Jeff the gnome.
- The list of things the criminals are charged with literally ends with "jaywalking".
- When Moe is asked to place his hand on the Bible, it bursts into flames. He's used to this.
- The horrible thing Freakshow did to Barney? He poured his beer over his head.
- Mr. Krabs tells a fantastical story of what happened to the Krusty Krab...until he's reminded that he's under oath. He grumpily admits that he was in the bathroom.
- Pearl tells the court of the horrible things the criminals did. When she admits that Lapis had fun and Connie got some hands-on sword practice, Hutz is quick to twist it around and claim his client "created satisfaction and helped with sword practice".
- Hutz discovers that, due to not vetting his witness list, they're all enemies of the defendants. He asks for a brief recess, but when the judge realizes he just wants an excuse to flee the county, is shot down.
- The jury's deliberations. Stan thinks that the group's crimes aren't so bad, Plankton obviously sees no problem with anything they did, Hugh wants to sing through all their options (and gets shot down by everyone else) and Shaggy wants to wrap everything up because it's been a half-hour since he last ate. Sandy declares that they can't just take the easy way out, and nothing will change her mind. Cut to her grumpily reading a Not Guilty verdict.
Cause and Defect
- Timmy enthuses about having a party with all his friends. Cut to him sitting on a couch with Chester and AJ, with Chirping Crickets.
- AJ points out that, whenever Timmy invites his interdimensional friends over, some horrible catastrophe happens.
- All of Timmy's attempts to invite someone.
- Jimmy is the first person Timmy tries to call. Suddenly, a Future Badass version of Jimmy comes in, saying that if he gets invited, the multiverse will be destroyed.
- Next, Timmy tries Danny and Spongebob. Cue Future!Sandy and one-eyed Future!Spongebob warning him that Dan Phantom's timeline will be ensured if he does that.
- Next is Dipper. Turns out he was needed for a very specific prophecy that wouldn't accept a fusion of him and Wendy, according to Future!Mabel and Future!Pacifica. And trying to call Mabel results in said fusion coming in to stop Weirdmageddon II.
- Next is Steven and Connie. Their future selves come in, telling him that "Crying Breakfast Friends" was canceled...and Homeworld invaded.
- Dib? Zim wins. Wirt? Everyone is trees. Arnold? Rampant hyperinflation. Trixie? Timmy apparently has terrible kids.
- Finally, Timmy gets so frustrated that he decides to go outside. Then a future version of him comes and tells him not to do so...because he'll get a really bad sunburn.
- The ending:
The Camping Episode
- When Sam asks Danny if he should really be leaving Amity Park unprotected, Danny tells her that he got Tucker to handle it. Cut to Tucker, oblivious to ghost-related chaos in the background, griping about the unclear ending of a fanfic.
- All the counselors are Obviously Evil...except for Hugh.
- The various antics that occur at Camp Voorhees (great name):
- Jimbo, Dolph, and Kearney being Too Dumb to Live in the face of free pizza.
- Sadie tries to tell Sideshow Bob that all her cabinmates were turned into postcards. He ignores her and sends her to the cabin over a dangerous rift.
- Nate, Lee, and Tambry discuss what one would call a three-headed bear...as it eats Thompson.
- Hugh accidentally raises the dead. Wendy fights them off with Excalibur, which she claims to have gotten out of the lake.
- The ending, in which Danny and Sam decide to never go camping again while trying not to get stabbed by Sideshow Bob.
E350 Presents: Rapunzel
- When Priscilla Northwest (playing the role of Rapunzel's mother) states that she only wants to eat rapunzel flowers, the narration takes the time to clarify that this is in the original fairytale.
- Vicky points out that Preston could have just bought the flowers off of her, to which he replies he doesn't want to pay his social inferiors.
- The repeated Lampshade Hanging of questioning how anyone gets in or out of the tower before Rapunzel's hair is long enough to climb, since there's no doors.
- After Vicky cuts Rapunzel's hair and tosses her and Mabel out of the tower, she suddenly realizes that she's trapped herself in the tower.
There's An App For That
- E350 is more concerned about the state of his computer and finishing his novel than the fact that his "friends, enemies, and vague acquaintances" are trapped in an app game.
- Soos mentions that the app "Candy Match Tap Blast Saga Unlimited" makes billions of dollars a day.Spongebob: But it's a free app, isn't it?
Connie: (pats him on the back) Oh, Spongebob, you sweet summer child.
- E350 mentions that Cosmo hasn't been in a chapter...of their lives for awhile.
- E350 finds out how expensive the high-tier heroes are:E350: Soos, how much is two million credits in real life?
Soos: Thirty-six thousand dollars.
- Mr. Monopoly apparently created the app game.
- The Beach City Fries ad.
- Connie calculates that either E350 will have to take one hundred and fourteen thousand years to beat the game, or pay forty-six million dollars.E350: Right. (whips out Anti-Magic Tommy Gun) We're robbing a bank.
- The entire 'shot is built around people coming to Ford for help with their problems, interrupting his attempts to get breakfast. It gets increasingly ridiculous.
Robbie: Uh... I've been dating a Mac?Soos: Better than a PC, am I right?
- First, Dipper comes in because he accidentally cast a spell in his sleep and trapped Mabel inside a book. Ford says it's not a big deal because he's been trapped in hundreds of books in his time, and it's nothing compared to the time he sleep-conjured Millard Fillmore.
- Then Stan comes up and reveals that Soos got into Ford's super adhesive and glued Waddles to his back.
- Wendy and Robbie then burst in, carrying Tambry, who's acting weird. Ford casually reveals that Tambry is a robot and suffering hard drive errors, only for Tambry (who, despite Ford's assumptions didn't know she was a robot) to be shocked into a shutdown.
Pacifica: I'm the hypotenuse!
- Then Amethyst and Peridot teleport in, having accidentally turned Greg into a car with the Fiddley Thing and needing help to find the setting that turns him back.
- Then a bunch of soldiers from the Fortunate Son Dimension show up to arrest Ford for stealing their Sacred Huey, and punish him by sticking him in a cage and force him to listen to The Doors on loop until he starves to death. Then Tracer shows up to fight them off.
- Gideon then bursts through the wall in a giant death robot he needs weapons for, so that he can take over the shack and kill Pacifica.
- Rick and Morty then teleport in, needing cream to deal with Morty's bad case of space crabs.
- Then a whole stream of people come pouring in, needing to talk to Ford for one reason or another, until he finally snaps and makes them all wait outside. Afterwards, he advises Dipper that, if he ever becomes famous, never advertise his home address, to which Dipper responds that he's going to retire to a private island.
Choose Your Own Ending III
- Yet another parody of Gamebooks, with multiple endings presented:
Tucker: Oh, yeah, that one. I think that's more a commentary on how utopia is unachievable.Danny: You don't pick up a Choose Your Own Adventure for deep philosophy, Tucker.
- Dipper is on a ship that traveling eighty times the speed of light, causing him to age into dust, with him complaining that that's not how relatively works. It's then noted that the author of the "book" is only getting five dollars for it, so how can they be expected to know anything about physics?
- Danny realizes that he, Sam, and Tucker are stuck in a CYOA book where you can only win by cheating.
Mr. Krabs: Arr, this a'int gonna end well.
- One ending has the Mystery Shack crew at the Battle of Waterloo — Ford is driving a jeep into the Old Guard, atop which the Duke of Wellington is hip-firing a machine gun, while Wendy is riding a unicorn and wielding Excalibur as she leads the British Foot Guards, Soos is giving riflemen a lift on a tank, Dipper, Mabel and Pacifica are riding a giant Chinese dragon overhead, and Stan is giving Marshal Ney a noogie. Ford is momentarily worried about the ramifications on the timeline, but decides that if they're going to screw up history, they may as well look cool doing it.
- The Spongebob gang have somehow defeated Thanos with The Power of Friendship (and bureaucracy), leaving Squidward with the Infinity Gauntlet. Which he promptly uses.
- The reader is forced to read Chicken, Chicken, which is treated as a Fate Worse than Death.
- Sadie steps into a room full of creepy wooden marionettes which turn to look at her. Then quickly runs away.
- Wirt finds the skeleton of a man who starved to death at his computer waiting for an update on Ruby Stars (one of E350's long-delayed projects).
E350 Presents: Billy Goats
- The story opens with a brief monologue wondering why Billy goats are referred to as such.
- The troll under the bridge is a parody of right-wing Internet trolls, who is constantly mentioned to be doing things such people tend to do, like posting YouTube comments and spamming people's Twitter feeds with death threats.
- At one point, he's also mentioned to be looking into the results of a local election in Australia, leading to a brief tangent as E350 tries to explain to non-Australians why this is important.
- Rick keeps showing up to criticize E350's jokes.
- It's explained that the reason the three Gems (standing in for the goats) cross the bridge one by one is that they lied to the census taker that there's only one person living in their home, and if they admit otherwise they have to pay higher taxes.
- After the troll gets curbstomped by Bismuth, he ends up being found by McGucket, Candy, and Grenda, who happily decide (after confirming that it's not cannibalism) to eat him.
Another Brick In The Wall
- Steven, Connie, and Sadie wake up to find themselves transformed into Legos, with no one else apparently noticing. And that's just the start of the weirdness:
- First, Sadie's concert is attacked by Gideon in a giant robot, only for him to in turn be attacked by Magneto, who is in turn attacked by Superman and Green Lantern (who arrives in a cab because his ring isn't charged and he doesn't have Uber).
- The Doctor shows up to warn Sadie that her concert will lead to the Daleks taking over the universe. Cut to a group of Daleks hiding backstage, disguised as sound equipment; when one questions the logic of this plan, the other two exterminate it.
- Then Doc Brown shows up and says that the concert has to happen, because their future depends on it. Then he and the Doctor get into a fight over who's telling the truth and who has a better time machine.
- As Steven's group tries to figure out what's going on, Harry Truman shows up to explain things... at which point E350 shows up, revealing that the whole thing was Floyd using them to act out a story he wrote.
- After returning everyone to normal, and them critiquing his story as making no sense, Floyd ends the story by dropping everyone in the Kenyan savannah, for some reason.
- Various fictional characters are depicted as becoming President of the United States, to varying levels of success:
- First is Lisa, who is highly successful despite having several people die at her inauguration (due to a literal glass ceiling being installed in the Congressional rotunda).
- Ms. Fowl has various problems during her administration, but did have the lasting achievement of appointing Sheen to the Supreme Court so he could settle the great pineapple-on-pizza debate.
- Fred becomes President on a law-and-order platform, and bizarrely becomes an autocrat. Anyone who dresses up as a monster (including trick-or-treaters) gets arrested indefinitely, he dissolves NATO (by sending them a "Let's split up, gang" note), and closes the nation's borders to anyone with the prefix "old man" in their name.
- Dipper wins on a pro-supernatural rights platform, his charisma, and the fact that he's apparently the only candidate who isn't a supervillain. He claims that the spirit of the Progressive Party's Bull Moose came to congratulate him on his election in a dream, and after retirement he and Wendy eventually Ascended to a Higher Plane of Existence (scholars of his life later claim both of these last two points are normal for him).
- Stevonnie is listed as one of the greatest presidents of all time. Then it's noted that the encyclopedia recording all this was published a group run by Peridot.
- Bruce Wayne gets elected on a "I am prepared for literally everything" platform. After he disappears (Batman apparently gets sent to the Phantom Zone), Carl takes over, only to have his reputation ruined by the publication of his love letters to Jimmy's mom.
- Crocker bans Christmas, automatically fails every elementary student in the country and dedicates a large portion of the Pentagon's budget to hunting fairies, but also somehow balances the economy. Shortly after reelection, he spasms himself out of a window of the Oval Office and dies. He's succeeded by Dib, who rolls back most of his reforms, but also establishes a Department of Hunting Bigfoot.
Love and Mishaps
- There's something hilarious about E350 willingly walking into what he knows is a trap, completely casual about it.
- E350 is horrified to realize that he's stuck in a Shout-Out to one of his most hated episodes of Doctor Who.
- The people who the Abacusbaloff absorbed after luring them into its alien discussion club:
- Squidward, who only joined because Mr. Krabs wanted him to sell stuff to the members.
- Zim, who thought he'd be the only alien infiltrating the group.
- Pearl, whose only reaction to being absorbed is to sigh that she's not letting Steven join the group.
- Hugh, who admits he thought the club was about ducks.
- E350 asking for clarification if anyone joined the club because they were interested in aliens. He gets a round of "no's".
- E350 needing a moment to realize he's the Abacusbaloff's next target.
- As the Abacusbaloff is gloating that E350 will never beat him, E350 just shoots him with the Anti-Magic Tommy Gun.
- Rick and Morty randomly showing up so that Rick can "save" Squidward by turning his remaining genetic goo into a living concrete slab, which begs for death. Rick sees nothing wrong with this.
- Totally fed up with everything, E350 grabs the Fiddley Thing off of Amethyst and Peridot and hits a random button, counting on whatever new reality he ends up in being better. He apparently turns himself into Lapis.
A Perfectly Logical Explanation
- Pacifica tries to get an answer out of Mabel as to why the Mudflap Factory is burning. Cue a chapter's worth of Mabel's somewhat skewed perspective on the event, with (a person who is heavily implied to be) Stan providing edits. Then at the end, Mabel asks Pacifica to come down to the county jail...and bring bail money.
- While the chapter in general is pretty serious (as befitting a final battle), there is a bit near the end that's rather humorous. Specifically, when the heroes on the ground see the escape pods coming from Rausseman's space station, this exchange happens:Peter: It looks like we're being invaded by ping-pong balls.
M'Baku: The ping-pong balls will die at my hands.
T'Challa: Yes, thank you M'Baku.
- Tucker and Danny are in disbelief that this year's opening number is a parody of Disney songs.
- Stan tries to sing "Let it Go", but E350 quickly shuts him down.
- Mabel and Dipper wonder what life would be like if they'd lived in a previous time period, leading to a series of parodies of each decade of the previous century:
- The 1900s: Styled like a silent movie, with Jimmy on his way to his lab and passing by Carl (who is speaking in an English accent for style). After Jimmy leaves, Carl casually comments he might die of pneumonia.
- The 1910s: The Voltron crew are in the British army in World War I, with the others trying to explain the domino effect of treaties that led to it to Lance. He ultimately gets too annoyed with it and leaves.
- The 1920s: Barney is drinking antifreeze in Moe's speakeasy. He's fine with going blind from it, as long as he's drunk.
- The 1930s: Danny is a farmer in the Dust Bowel. He points out that it sucks.
- The 1940s: This time, Lance is resigned to World War II being because of more treaties, but the others tell him that it's just because Nazis are that terrible.
- The 1950s: When Gideon's father tries to tell him all the flaws with American society in the 50s, he brushes him off because he's a straight white male and "that's all that matters".
- The 1960s: Spongebob seems to be looking at a lava lamp, but it's actually an orange juice container in an Arby's.
- The 1970s: Stan, sick of how unstable Western society is, tries to leave, only for it to turn out that he's trying to head to Iran. The travel attendant has to explain to him why that's a bad idea.
- The 1980s: Dib tries to warn Gaz of the infection of 80s fashion, only to find already afflicted. She then tries to infect him by playing "Waterloo".
- The 1990s: AJ gives Timmy a summary of the general 90s atmosphere... even though Timmy was just asking about The Clone Saga.
- The 2000s: This time, Lance asks why they're in Iraq. All Hunk can think of is "oil".
The Full Picture With Rush Carlson
- According to Amethyst, Pearl was once chased by the police. It apparently wasn't a big deal.
- There's something humorous about the blatantly Manipulative Editing being used to make the Crystal Gems look bad.
Bewarb the Blob
- Mabel ate an unknown substance in Ford's lab because she thought it was Smile Dip, turning her into the titular creature. Ford is more annoyed than anything about this new development, which Stan lampshades.We should probably be concerned about how well he's taking this.
- Soos tries to listen to "99 Luftballoons" on the radio to relax, only for Dipper and Mabel to tell him that it's about nuclear war.
- Manly Dan's reaction to Mabel splatting on his windshield.Manly Dan: IT'S WHAT I'VE ALWAYS FEARED. GUM HAS REVEALED ITSELF AS A GOVERNMENT WEAPON!
Wendy: No, Dad, it's just a Mystery Shack thing.
Manly Dan: GET MY AXE! I NEED TO FIGHT BACK!
- Soos tries to point out how Manly Dan's death was surprisingly dark for a comedy story, but the others drive away before he can finish.
- Pacifica grumbles about her parents being real slimeballs...right before the Mabel-blob comes and eats them.Uh...that's...not what I meant, but...okay.
- Ford's backup plan if he can't cure Mabel? Make like Rick and skip dimensions.
- Ford's "quick and scientific test" to determine who would have to cure Mabel? A round of eenie-meenie-miney-moe.
- The ending: Pacifica stops Mabel from destroying the world, but the two become fused.Pacifica: I hate you, Ford.
Ford: Yes, you've told me repeatedly.
The Reject Shop
- This entry is a collection of rejected story concepts from HU7 and HU8, all of which are worth a few laughs:
- The first one has Rick and Morty visiting the stream of consciousness chamber where E350's rejected story ideas go to die, deciding that watching them is better than watching Jerry's vacation slide show.
- The author's note on this entry acknowledges that this is the same basic concept as what this whole chapter is based on.
- The second one has E350 being called to a mall to fight an absorbing alien. He's clearly not taking it seriously, being too focused on how it's a knock-off of one of the worst Doctor Who episodes.
- The third is a parody of Star Wars. It opens with a note that initially apologizes to George Lucas, but then says that he's the one who should be apologizing for making the Star Wars Holiday Special.
- Rick as Darth Vader. And when confronted by the captain of the ship he's attacking, the latter tries to cite metaphysics to state that they're not even there, but Rick just kills him mid-sentence out of boredom.
- The stormtroopers are all lawyers.
- The last one is a parody of Invasion of the Body Snatchers featuring the Crystal Gems. When it's explained that the Person Pods target intelligent life, Amethyst asks why they're on Earth then.
- The first one has Rick and Morty visiting the stream of consciousness chamber where E350's rejected story ideas go to die, deciding that watching them is better than watching Jerry's vacation slide show.
Brother Can You Spare a Soul?
- Mr. Krabs assures Sandy that he was going to handle her death professionally while hiding a shovel behind his back.
- Sandy figures that she's just having an out-of-body experience, and thinks that she can get back into her body with proper medical help. Cue a monstrous Krabby Patty bursting out of her body, followed by Mr. Krabs smashing it (and the body) to bits, followed by a brain monster bursting out of her head.
- Mr. Krabs tries to pull out the piece of paper Sandy used to give him her soul, only to initially pull out a coupon instead.
- Squidward's reaction to everything going on.
- Mr. Krabs gleefully talks about how he's dreamed about owning a soul for years, and how he even roleplayed it before Pearl was born. Spongebob assumes he's talking about Dungeons and Dragons-style roleplaying, prompting a Sure, Let's Go with That response.
- Sandy defeating Mr. Krabs by using his love of money against him.
- After he dies of a heart attack, it turns out Mr. Krabs sold his soul to so many people that they're all going to court over it.
Letters to the Author
- The entire entry is Danny, Sandy, and Timmy answering some of E350's mail, and some of the responses are pretty funny:
- The first letter is asking for relationship advice. Sandy tells the writer to just go listen to Paul Simon for advice.
- The second is an ad for a Church of Happyology scam (and a thinly-veiled jab at Butch Hartman's OAXIS project).
- The third leads to a debate on Cosmo and Wanda's Story-Breaker Power. Which culminates in this exchange:Sandy: Plus, well... Cosmo's an acquired taste.
Sandy: You're not gonna say that hurts?
Timmy: No, that's fair.
- The sixth leads to a debate on why E350 like World War II, with Danny saying that it's because it's the closest thing to a clear-cut good-vs-evil battle.Timmy: I don't care about any of that! I just like the tanks and explosions!
Danny: Let it never be said you're a boy of nuance, Timmy.
Timmy: Yeah, thinking gets in the way of things.
- The eighth letter asks why E350 writes critical fics about some characters and not others. The blunt response is "Pure favoritism".
- The ninth is a letter questioning why E350 keeps killing Danny. The others quickly realize Danny himself wrote this one.
Welcome To Your New Job!
- The whole thing is hilarious, being a cheerful and upbeat guide to working at a Men in Black-esque organization. Here are some of the highlights:
- "Welcome to your new job at the Department for Paranormal Containment (not to be confused with the SCP Foundation, who our lawyers have instructed us to tell you we've never heard of)."
- Among the weapons DPC agents can access are trained bees.
- Lars accidentally erases himself from existence, as an example of how carefully agents have to handle their equipment.
- "Remember, the best agent is always a CAMP agent!"
- The differences between a good and bad agent being highlighted with Patrick and Spongebob. The former overreacts to a witness's questions and eventually attacks them, while the latter calmly reassures his witness... then whacks him over the head.
- What to do if a monster breaks containment:
Sheen: I don't get it. Garlic kills vampires. Why do you always take the bread?
- For vampires, just leave out some garlic bread.
Vampire!Carl: (weakly scoffing garlic bread) It's...it's so frickin' good!
Despite what some songs and films imply, there are no more or less werewolves in London than anywhere else.
- Werewolves: Mabel manages to neutralize werewolf!Pacifica with belly rubs and squeaky toys. Also, this:
Agent: I'm sorry, sir, there are no aliens here. We sell teriyaki chicken.Dib: Teriyaki- you just brought Bigfoot in! On the back of a truck, in a cage! How dumb do you think I am?Agent: You saw swamp gas reflected off a weather balloon.Dib: I did not! That was Bigfoot! You're a secret MIB-type organization and-Agent: You saw V2 rocket testing in the New Mexican desert.Dib: See! You keep changing your excuse! I'll expose you! You hear me?! IIIII'LLL EXPOOOOOSE YOOOOUUUU!Agent: Sir, this is an Arbys.
- For wizards, it's best to find a witch, warlock, or witch-hunter to deal with them. Cut to Keith (dressed in 17th century witch-hunter gear) scolding wizard!Lance like a toddler for turning agents into frogs and inanimate objects. He also turns Lisa into a coffee table; she's then "promoted" to being used in the Director's office.
- The fact that they have an entry on lawyers (who you're supposed to distract with legal babble before double-tapping them). And Dib, who you're supposed to distract with Implausible Deniability, leading to this:
- "Yes, Will Smith was an agent at some point. He's been a lot of things."
- The guide ends with a message that it will self-destruct... as soon as they find the remote to do so. The reading agent is then asked to reach under the couch and see if they can find it.
The Curse of the Cursed Curse
- The story is narrated by a version of Rick and Morty, who apparently accidentally killed the Brothers Grimm and then took some of their stories.
- One of the first narrative exchanges between them is arguing whether or not Grimsby can be a fairytale kingdom stand-in. Later, they debate whether Swindon can stand-in as a fairy location.
- After a joke about cannibalism, Morty notes that it seems too dark. Rick says that cannibalism is always funny when it's not happening to you.
- In the end, Rick struggles for An Aesop, and ultimately ignores Morty's suggestions to go with "Christopher Columbus was a jerk", with Morty asking what that has to do with anything.
- Mabel has to work on the poo farms because her family were all turned into turnips.
- Gaz's medieval idea of entertaining herself is to have minstrels beaten, then going on horse rides to hit peasants with sticks.
- Timmy's Dad is a little too into being beaten.
- When Mabel hits her Rage Breaking Point at Gaz's behavior, Rick briefly describes her becoming Batman, before realizing he got his notes mixed up.
- Mabel goes to the fairies for help. Wanda asks for her soul in exchange, but Mabel offers a gumball instead. Cosmo takes the deal.
- After Mabel switches lives with Gaz, Rick says that Gaz could have gotten her life back if she'd learned to be a better person. Morty asks if she did, to which Rick says no, she became a mercenary and sacked Constantinople in the Fourth Crusade.Morty: Oh. Uh... that was unexpected.Rick: Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what Constantinople said too.
They Blocked Dipper's Game
- The entire story is a mockery of Blizzard's poor handling of Hearthstone users making casual political comments, so there's a few laughs to be had, starting with the fact that Ford gets blocked just because he's briefly on screen when Dipper makes his "offense".
- There's also the fact that the corporate people are presented as so blatantly evil that they outright admit they're working to suppress democracy.
- Preston's evil corporate overlord is Winnie the Pooh. And Piglet is his Darth Vader.
- When Preston is facing punishment, he pulls a violin out of nowhere and starts playing "Nearer My Go To Thee".
The Prime Ministers of Australia
- Once again, E350 does a sardonic listing of a nation's leaders. That's really all that needs to be said.
Run On For A Long Time
- Despite being a serious entry, there's still a couple of funny moments.
- When Fearless Leader is spotted at the huge gathering of villains at the Backslide Tavern, it's noted that everyone thought he died when the Iron Curtain came down; Vicky shares a rumor that Bullwinkle shot him.
- Just the fact that all the villains apparently get together regularly to play UNO, of all things.
SquidRiffs: How Far We've Come
- Squidward is made to once again riff on one of E350's older works — specifically, the very first story in the Halloween Unspectacular series.
- He derides that part of the villains' plot in the story involves the Chum Bucket making sales, stating that Plankton could be giving away free money and no one would come to his restaurant... then immediately amends himself that no one but Mr. Krabs would come.
- He takes great offense at General Katana (from the much derided Highlander II: The Quickening) being included in the story, despite not even watching movies himself.
- After finishing, he stomps off in a huff. It's stated that no one notices.
- Again, despite the overall serious theme, there's plenty of humor.
- When Kent Brockton is covering the Stranger's string of bombings, it's with the not quite appropriate title graphic "Somebody Set Us Up The Bomb". Later, when covering the bombing of the Backslide in particular, it's changed to "Bar Room Blitz".
- Lance Thunder is again forced to cover breaking news despite being a weatherman. And when he brings up the release of documents proving Vlad is Plasmius, Vlad denies them and threatens to utterly destroy Lance if he ever mentions it again.
- Shandra attempts to cover the robbery of the Iron Monger suit from a CIA base in Australia, only for the agent she's talking with to repeatedly give non-answers, to her frustration.
- E350 is utterly apathetic to the Stranger's rampage, being more focused on throwing his fundraising party. And when Danny goes to confront the Stranger, he suggests Danny take Amethyst — not because he thinks she can help, but because she keeps trying to eat the meat tenderizer.
- Overall, this 'shot is deadly serious. But there is a brief moment of humor when Peridot loudly proclaims that she's about to raise a fallen helicopter from the river... only for nothing to happen. She then tries again, with the same result. This is followed by an awkward silence, broken only by someone coughing.
Party at E3's
- Timmy points out the logical fallacy of E350 throwing a house party when he's already being evicted for noise complaints.
- The Long List of E350's enemies for some reason includes the Sicilian Mafia, Henry Cavill, and the Teamsters Union.
- Jimmy complains about playing Life, in that board games are supposed to be relaxing, rather than having to worry about having kids and mortgages. When Lapis comments that this is still a new experience for her, mentioning that Gems don't pay taxes, Tucker thinks that they're an anarchist utopia; he's understandably perturbed when Lapis instead casually spells out how repressive Gem society was.
- Dib questions the Fridge Logic of how Patrick (as a starfish) can talk without a brain. Patrick takes offence and hits him.
- Plankton takes advantage of E350's disappearance to finally take over fanfiction by seizing control of Halloween Unspectacular. Which just means showing ripoffs of famous movie scenes starring himself:
"Frankly my computer wife, I don't give a damn!"
- Plankton as Palpatine, corrupting Spongebob with tales of how the Secret Formula can save money.
- A single line from Gone with the Wind:
- Him quoting the famous Motive Rant from A Few Good Men, only talking about supervillains and his college education.
- Reenacting the "Never let go" scene from Titanic (1997), but then letting go to grab the secret formula out of his partner's pocket.
- Before he can get to a parody of Schindler's List, Chief Wiggum bursts in arrest him for bad taste in comedy. Plankton tries to escape with rocket shoes, only for Lou to point out that he's barefoot.
- A realty insurance form for your average fictional world, mixing fantastical and mundane stuff, is bound to be worth a few laughs. For example, things like asbestos or termites are mentioned alongside hellhounds or Excalibur.
- One question asks if the person filling out the form was ever a member of various cults, conspiracies, the Communist Party, or OAXIS.
- One question asks if the Grinch Who Stole Christmas was a previous owner of the property, then clarifies that Grinches who didn't steal Christmas are fine.
- The last question asks "What is love?", with one of the answers being lyrics from the song of the same name.
The Sooshank Redemption
- The first step of Soos and Stevonnie's plan to bust Sandy out of prison is to meet with a contact on the inside. Who turns out to be a guy dressed as a WWII RAF officer, who thinks the prison is a German Stalag, and is trying to dig an escape tunnel back to Britain (under the Atlantic) with spoons. Stevonnie is naturally confused.
- Seeing that the plan is working, Soos instinctively asks for a fist bump, which a guard complies with despite not knowing why he wants one.
Soos: Well, never look a gift horse in the mouth.
- When that guy is the only guard left after the planned distraction goes off, Soos reluctantly prepares to knock him out with a chair, only for a random other prisoner to run up and knock him out for beating him at cards.
- After grabbing Sandy, they then flee, ramming the laundry van through a gate on the way out. Since the only guards at that gate are Blubs and Durls, they don't care.
- The warden justifies Sandy's escape by pointing out he only ever said that the prison was "nearly inescapable", not "completely inescapable".
- The FBI agent put in charge of hunting Sandy down swears to find and arrest everyone involved in the breakout.Agent Parker: They don't call me 'Nosey' Parker for nothing.Blue Haired Lawyer: No, they call you that because you have a big nose.Agent Parker: Get out of my office.
- Steven picks up a hitchhiking Rick and Morty, who have apparently just buried an alien Morty accidentally killed with a high-five. Things go downhill from there.
- Rick notes how the term "manslaughter" is sexist because it's used even when you accidentally kill a woman. Morty actually agrees with him.
- Steven's quick summary of his life story:"Oh, I'm just driving around the country to find myself. Y'know, 'cause my mom and her family were alien space dictators, and then I had a midlife crisis at sixteen and literally turned into a monster...
- When Steven and Rick start fighting, Rick pulls a laser gun on Steven. One Gilligan Cut later, Rick is imbedded in a cactus. Morty notes that considering most people Rick pisses off want to kill him, this is an improvement.
- Upon finding out that E350 moved to a cliffside shack after last year's climax, Steven expresses surprise, as he'd assumed he'd gone on a quest of self-discovery, because that's what you do in these situations.
- Soos reluctantly admitting that he broke Sandy out of prison to perform an intervention because E350 has gone all Thor in Avengers: Endgame.
- When trying to snap E350 out of his Heroic BSoD by pointing out that a year ago he'd have already been coming up with a plan:E350: Yeah, and a year ago, I was an idiot.Steven: That's not true!(Connie, Sandy, and Soos stare at him)Steven: Okay, it's true, but it's not bad!
- Sandy pointing out that E350 literally labeled a window he stares out of to brood as "the brooding window". She also states that if he wanted to be normal, he wouldn't be living on a house on the side of a cliff.
The Focus Group
- Jimmy reveals to the Nicktoons that he's had to accept corporate sponsorship to keep the team funded. When Danny asks how he was funding them beforehand, Jimmy casually mentions selling depleted uranium on the black market.
- The corporate board that now owns the Nicktoons discussing how they can make the team more appealing to young viewers. The fact that they immediately make it clear that they don't know what young people like should be a warning of how well this goes.
- One suggestion is to give the team Dork Age-style costumes, with large shoulder pads and glowing lines.
- Most of the board being unable to wrap their heads around having more than one girl on the team.
- Not a single board member can think of a black protagonist to add to the team.
- The only villain that the board can think of that might come across as offensive to have as an antagonist is Dark Laser.
- After the board adjourns, it turns out that Mr. Burns is the CEO, and this whole thing is a villainous plot to crush hero teams.
- Smithers mentions that Homer has become a pie-themed superhero that the corporation is trying to franchise.
E3's Eleven (Minus Six)
- While outlining his plan to steal the Crucible, E350 makes a random comment about Call of Duty: Ghosts being the worst in the series. Steven notes the oddity of throwing that in.
- Stevonnie goes to the police in a Paper-Thin Disguise and says that the District Attorney wants E3's Anti-Magic Tommy Gun for display at the county fair. Since the cops in question are Lou and Eddie, they buy this without question.
- When Agent Parker shows up looking for the gun and is told that the DA wanted it, he panics and assumes they mean DeviantArt. When they correct him, he pretends he was just kidding, but they don't buy it.
- The guy selling Soos a car nearly breaks into a rendition of "Greased Lightning" before Soos cuts him off.
- When Tulip protests the insanity of E3's plan, he counters by asking if it's more insane than the plot of Infinity Train. She admits his point.
- E3 starts giving a Rousing Speech that rapidly turns into a knockoff of Churchill's "Never surrender" speech.
- Then Soos ruins the moment by tripping during the group's slow motion walk. E3 makes everyone start over for another take.
Robot Connie vs the Moon Nazis
- As the title suggests, this whole entry is an Affectionate Parody of 1950s sci-fi B-movies. Naturally, it's full of Ham and Cheese.
- It's noted that the lab guys who made Connie turned her name into an acronym and only then decided what it should stand for.
- Science Princess Peridot's gown is constantly stirring in a breeze, even though Connie's sure there wasn't one a moment ago.
- Connie can breathe in space because she's a robot, Peridot can do it because she's a science princess, and Amethyst can do it... because she's British.
- Hitler has anime super powers courtesy of the Japanese.
- Just when the story starts talking about Chief Warlock Himmler, it cuts to E350 writing it on his laptop, with Stevonnie cutting in that that last part is a bit too much. E3 admits the point, then reveals he was just procrastinating towards getting to the Catalyst plan.
We Interrupt This Program
- The news' stock file photo of E350 is him with his finger up his nose and falling out of a chair.
- Kent Brockman reveals that the station has received a threatening letter from the Bus Driver and that it's against the station's policies to read it on air... and then proceeds to do so anyway.
Night of the Living Stereotypes
- Stan apparently made several jokes about why zombies would look for brains in Gravity Falls.
- When Dipper is moaning about Mabel and Pacifica being infected, Stan helpfully points out that the same thing happened to Soos.
- Rather than traditional zombies, the infected turn into historical stereotypes.
- Pacifica becomes a medieval peasant.
- Mabel becomes a 1920s flapper girl.
- Wendy becomes an 18th century French noblewoman. So does Dipper.
- Stan and Ford's reactions to having to make a Last Stand against the zombie horde.Stan: For the record? I blame you for this.Ford: That's reasonable.
- While making said last stand, Ford notes that to cure the plague, he's need "a Sev'ral Timez album, a mountain of formaldehyde, a mountain of cinnamon, and a very large fire hose".
Meanwhile, in Space...
- The Mass Effect characters' sheer confusion at the presence of E350's group.
- E350's derision of the Catalyst is manifested by its speech being presented as meaningless gibberish.
Double the Agent, Double the Fun
- The entire sequence where E350 is stocking his group up on heavy weaponry, all of which he claims is stun only. Despite the fact that it includes crowbars, a Browning machine gun, and landmines.Sandy: (about the mines) What, do they explode into stun fire?E350: Yes.
- E3's explanation is just to Hand Wave it as "science".
- Agent Parker's Insane Troll Logic spiel about how unelected, unaccountable people like him are better representatives of democracy than elected politicians. He also seems to think that pictures of the Attorney General eating at Carl Jrs. counts as blackmail material.
It Has Been An Honor
- How does the Bus Driver ultimately sabotage E350's plan? By pulling the plug on his modem.
- Sandy and Stevonnie note that the Bus Driver's petty nature makes it very hard to feel any sympathy for him dying from cancer.
- E350 notes that since Halloween Unspectacular is rated T, he's allowed one Precision F-Strike per story, but has never used it. Facing the Last Stand, he gives the honor to Tulip, whose wording leaves Agent Parker incoherent in rage.Tulip: Fuck the police!
Halloween Unspectacular: The Album
- Troy McClure interrupts the unfolding Final Battle to advertise an album containing song parodies about the various stories across the HU series.
The Bright Side of Life
- When the Mystery Shack crew shows up for the Final Battle, Dipper complains that he's the only one without a weapon.
- Plankton arrives in a robot suit and gleefully joins the fray.Plankton: Finally, an excuse to fight the law and be praised for it!
- Group Captain Mallory, the WWII prisoner Stevonnie met back in Devil's Island, shows up to provide air support.
- E350 is surprised to learn he has a legal team, and asks to know who they are. Cue scene cut to Lionel Hutz, the Zircons, and Timmy's Dad.Blue Zircon: Hey, since when are you a lawyer?
- E350 summons his Viking friend Thorvald to break through the cabin's defenses. Thorvald charges the door... then pauses and sprinkles some olive oil on the doorknob, which shorts out the security system. Tulip is left incredulous at such a Weaksauce Weakness.
- The Bus Driver's final gambit is to use the Fiddley Thing to create an evil Nazi version of E350, as part of a "The Reason You Suck" Speech about how he's the true villain. Before E3 up and decides to just obliterate the illusion, Nazi!E3 makes out with Nazi!Sandy; after the illusion is broken, Sandy is left retching in disgust, which E3 notes doesn't do much for his self-esteem.Sandy: Does evil-you ever brush his darn teeth?E350: Probably not, he's evil after all.
- The Bus Driver is dumbfounded when, after talking him down, E350 breaks out into a rendition of "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life".
- The final lines of the story, and thus the series:No bus drivers were harmed in the making of this series.Many Nazis were, but we don't care so much about them.