The title character of the show. He's a deadpan, gravelly-voiced everyman who's faced with all the concerns of a middle-aged man in rural Canada. Besides keeping the audience informed on what's going on at the lodge he's the head of, he offers advice to any middle-agers just like him. Played by comedian Steve Smith, who also does comedy tours as the Red Green character.
Tropes associated with Red:
- Afraid of Blood: Faints at the sight of it as learned in Episode 170. Harold delights in finally finding something at which Red is more of a wimp than he is.
- Badass Beard
- Catch-Phrase: Several:
- During the intro sequence to season 6: "What you're looking at now is a bunch of segments from this particular show. The main message being: For gosh sakes, don't even think about changing the channel. I tell ya something, if you want to make sense of this program, you have to give it your undivided attention."
- Also: "Stay tuned and relax; whatever this is, we've got a lot more of it."
- "Big week up at the Lodge..."
- "If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy." In the same segment, after finishing a project, Red frequently says, "And it's just that easy."
- "If it ain't broke, you're not trying."
- "Remember: Any tool can be the right tool."
- "Remember, I'm pullin' for ya. We're all in this together."
- "If my wife is watching, I'll be coming straight home after the meeting..."
- "And to the rest of you, on behalf of myself, and Harold, and the whole gang up here at Possum Lodge, keep your stick on the ice."
- "...the handyman's secret weapon, duct tape."
- The Cold Open for every season 4 episode had: "It's not smart or correct, but it's one of the things that makes us what we are."
- In "Adventures With Bill", Red often says "Later that day..." when Bill and the other characters try and fail to accomplish a simple task.
- Cool Old Guy
- Creator Thumbprint: Red shares Steve Smith's love of cars and beer.
- Deadpan Snarker
- D.I.Y. Disaster: Often.
- Duct Tape for Everything: It's the handyman's secret weapon, after all.
- Embarrassing First Name: Red's first name is not "Red"; Harold finds out what it really is and understands why he uses his nickname. According to Red's biography seen online and on DVDs, Red's mother originally wanted to name him "Plaid", but his father disagreed. She got even when she bought Red his first plaid flannel shirt.
- Handyman: "If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy."
- Happily Married: Red ends every show with a message for his wife, with whom he apparently has a very good relationship.
- Nice Hat: His green fishing hat.
- Vocal Evolution: Steve's voice for Red started out rather flat, hesitant and monotone, but became more dynamic over time.
Red's nerdy nephew, and the butt of many jokes. He's also the "technical" man on the show, using a strange looking gadget to "control" the many Idiosyncratic Wipes. Played by Patrick McKenna.
Tropes associated with Harold:
- Annoying Laugh
- Catch-Phrase: Not as many as Red, but a few:
- "Your hero, my uncle, Red Green!"
- In the Experts segment: "Now we examine those three little words that men find so hard to say..." (audience replies: "I. Don't. Know!") When he gets ready to read the first letter, he usually says: "Dear experts, (motions to them with his hand) hwah..." (or less frequently, "La la la...")
- When the possum squeal was heard at the end of an episode: "Meeting time, Uncle Red."
- Embarrassing Middle Name: Harold Spooner Dortmund Mepps Green.
- Lookalike Lovers: Eventually starts dating a girl named Bonnie, who is essentially a female version of himself (much to Red's horror). They become engaged late in the series' run and the series finale involves their wedding. This trope even applied when they both got makeovers to become more attractive to each other without the other's knowledge, and their new outfits turn out to be identical.
- Nerd Glasses
- Put on a Bus: After the show's eighth season, McKenna began having personal difficulties and decided to leave the show. Harold was shown getting a job in the city and was phased out of the show over the next two seasons. Once McKenna got his issues sorted out, Harold returned, having been explained as being named his company's community liaison to Possum Lake.
- Verbal Tic: He sometimes makes a "whaaaaah" sound.
- He also frequently repeats sentences three or four times excitedly, much to Red's annoyance.
The owner of "Humphrey's Everything Store" but a rather tight-fisted individual. Also rather henpecked by his unseen wife, Ann Marie. Played by Bob Bainborough.
Tropes associated with Dalton:
- Bratty Teenage Daughter: Dalton's daughter is one of the chief thorns in his side.
- Henpecked Husband
- Messy Hair
- Overprotective Dad
- The Scrooge: He has some traits of this. Many episodes show him to be absurdly tight with a buck and rather cranky.
Owner of Rothschild's Sewage and Septic Sucking Services. Mostly around to make Toilet Humor and/or make cute jingles about his company. Played by Jeff Lumby.
Tropes associated with Winston:
- Added Alliterative Appeal: Rothschild's Sewage and Septic Sucking Services.
- Casanova Wannabe: Winston has an active but massively unsuccessful love life, mostly because he loves his job and loves talking about it.
- Catch-Phrase: "Winston Rothschild here, of Winston Rothschild's Sewage and Septic Sucking Services..."
- The Dandy: Somewhat surprisingly considering his line of work, he is always immaculately and spotlessly dressed. Even more amazing, he is an example of this trope even though he normally wears a plastic safety helmet and hip waders.
- Married to the Job: He finds his line of work endlessly fascinating, and will go on at length about it at any opportunity. He was very proud of the time he managed the immensely difficult task of talking to a woman on a plane for the entire flight without mentioning sewage even once.Winston: Not even when they brought us our meals!
- Running Gag: Between segments, he would recite a slogan about his company (i.e., "If your nose is stinging, our phone should be ringing!", "Service with a smile — even on hot days!"). In later seasons, it appears he's increased his advertising budget, since his commercials became full-blown parodies of real-life commercials, TV shows, and movie trailers.
- Toilet Humor: And often.
- "Well Done, Son!" Guy: Winston's dad always wanted him to be a lawyer, and the two still haven't worked things out.
The subject of the black and white "Adventures with Bill" segments. He's mostly there for the subject of physical abuse. Played by Rick Green.
Tropes associated with Bill:
- Accidental Aiming Skills: In one "Adventures with Bill" segment, he tried to shoot a pop can off a tree stump. After missing several times he got frustrated and started firing like a madman until the gun was empty. When the camera panned out, the stump had been carved into a perfect likeness of Red, but the can remained undisturbed.
- Gravity Is a Harsh Mistress: See above.
- Iron Butt Monkey: Even Wile E. Coyote would be amazed at how many injuries Bill sustains.
- Put on a Bus: Green left the show for a few years to focus on his educational comedy show History Bites. Unlike with McKenna and Harold, Bill's disappearance was never explained, with the rest of the cast joining Red in the Adventure segments. When History Bites ended and Green came back, Bill returned as if nothing had ever happened.
- Trouser Space: He fits everything in his overalls.
- The Voiceless: The only sounds in the "Adventures with Bill" segments are usually the ambient noise and Red's voiceover; this is justified by Steve Smith, who said that the camera had a bad mic. However, there was a time when Bill could be plainly heard chattering away; turns out he's really a Motor Mouth. This is most evident in season 8, when faint vocals from Bill were added to the segments.
A not-too-with-it forest ranger assigned to a tower, in which he has been cooped up for 13 years by the time Red finds him. Portrayed by Peter Keleghan.
Tropes associated with Gord:
- And Knowing Is Half the Battle: Parodied in the educational segments, which offered hilariously inaccurate nature lessons (e.g., that rocks are eggs).
- Cloud Cuckoolander
- Go Mad from the Isolation
- Her Codename Was Mary Sue: Present in the educational segments: Gord is portrayed as a muscular, all-knowing, woman-attracting hunk and the other Lodge members are portrayed as very unintelligent Funny Animals. Hilariously, Red and Harold often give correct information in the shorts, but within the universe of the shorts, they are wrong and Gord's Cloud Cuckoolander explanations are right.
- Mood-Swinger: Will often cry at the drop of a hat, though this trait was more prominent in the earlier seasons.
- Small Name, Big Ego: Wasn't initially part of his personality (he was more needy than anything else), but became part of it over time. His animated educational films were extensions of this.
- Stylistic Suck: The educational segments were given bad animation and voice acting (Gord did all the voices) on purpose.
A criminal, on parole from prison. Portrayed by Wayne Robson.
Tropes associated with Mike:
- Ambiguously Bi
- Disappeared Dad: Mike frequently mentions his dad... but it's usually prefixed with a day of the week ("my Friday dad... two weeks running!"). Mike's mom Really Gets Around, apparently. When Red, Mike, and Dalton are discussing what they would do with a time machine, Mike says he would go back to nine months before he was born so he could finally find out who his real dad is.
- Irony: By the end of the series, he gets a job as a police officer but crime is super low because he now has a job.
- Keet: He gets very excited when introducing the Possum Lodge Word Game.
- Limited Wardrobe: Black shirt and jeans.
- Sticky Fingers
Edgar K. B. Montrose
A hearing-impaired explosive enthusiast. He solves everything by blowing it up. Portrayed by Graham Greene.
Tropes associated with Edgar:
- Catch-Phrase: "Ka-BOOM!"
- Killed Off for Real: In the "Where Are They Now?" Epilogue he dies attempting to make a self-heating recliner out of C4 plastique.
- No Indoor Voice: Justified in that his line of work has left him half-deaf.
- Stealth Punny Name: His middle initials "K. B.". Now what could those possibly stand for? Hint: Look 3 lines up, under Catch-Phrase.
- Stuff Blowing Up: His specialty.
An old man who operates a water taxi service but is better known for lying blatantly about his entire life. Portrayed by Gordon Pinsent.
Tropes associated with Hap
- Blatant Lies: It's not that Hap is a Bad Liar in as much as his stories are so over the top that there's no way he could've done all of it.
- Hypocrite: He's usually the first one to call out other people for lying or exaggerating.
- Know-Nothing Know-It-All: And proud of it.
- The Munchausen: Hap is practically the poster boy for this trope.
A highly paranoid animal control officer. Played by Jerry Schaefer.
Tropes associated with Ed:
- Animals Hate Him: The creatures of the wild want nothing to do with Ed.
- Cowardly Lion: And how. He seems deathly afraid of most of the animals, but manages to pull through.
- Meaningful Name: "Frid" looks and sounds a bit like "afraid".
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Subverted; he replaced another animal control officer character with a completely opposite personality (his name was Garth Harble), perhaps because Ed's personality was funnier.
A roofer and aspiring country singer.
- Dreadful Musician: He really can't sing.
- The Klutz: Implied by his constant injuries. He's often wearing casts, in a wheelchair, etc.
Became Bill's regular replacement during the "Adventures" segments and continued to be featured on the show after Bill returned to Possum Lake. Played by Joel Harris
Tropes associated with Walter:
- Iron Butt Monkey: He is on the receiving end of heaping helpings of physical abuse but none of his injuries have lasting effects.
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Bill and Walter might not look anything alike, but they're both accident-prone men who dress exclusively in overalls.
- The Voiceless: Moreso than Bill. The only time he's heard making a sound is when he's breathing heavily because Red's been making him run laps without water.
A conspiracy theorist who was convinced the world was going to end, and gave up everything he had to adopt a survivalist lifestyle in an underground cave. Red occasionally visited him and tried to convince him to come to his senses, but Jack turned him down. Only appeared during season 1. Played by Tim Sims.
Tropes associated with Jack:
A local hippie pilot. Debuted in season 3, and last seen in season 7. Played by Peter Wildman.
Tropes associated with Buzz:
- Does Not Know His Own Strength: Frequently greeted Red and Harold (who was behind the camera) with a punch to the shoulder, which the two never looked forward to.
- Drives Like Crazy: In his plane, that is.
- New-Age Retro Hippie
The lesser-known of the two characters whose profession was animal control. Often got annoyed at Red, went off on tangents (so that Red had to remind him what today's topic was), and seemed to hate his profession when things went wrong. Only appeared during season 5. Played by Derek McGrath.
Tropes associated with Garth:
- Catch-Phrase: "Garth Harble here, (salutes) animal control." And when things went wrong: "Another super day."
A motorhead whose biggest love in life is his monster truck. Played by Ian Thomas.
Tropes associated with Dougie
- Eagleland: A very patriotic American... except that he's a Canadian living in Canada. Not that's he's aware of this.Dougie: [after failing to guess "Canada" in the Possum Lodge Word Game] What, that's still a country?!
- Real Men Hate Affection: He once failed to guess "Love" in the Possum Lodge Word Game, then implied he knew what the word was all along, but nobody will ever be able get him to say it for as long as he lives.
Owner of Glen Brachston's Marina. He's incredibly lazy and, whenever Red does a segment on him, coaxes Red to do all the work for him. Played by Mark Wilson.
Tropes associated with Glen:
- Lazy Bum: Somewhat justified, as he's had 3 heart attacks (5 by series' end) and can't overexert himself (that's his excuse, anyway).
Owner of another Possum Lake marina. A replacement for Glen, and even lazier than him, if that can be believed. Played by George Buza.