Return to the main Two Best Friends Play Funny Moments index here.
- TMNT & Gundam Wing:
Woolie: This is Divekick!(...)Liam: She has like 20 magic pixels, what the hell!?(...)Matt: Please look forward to TMNT: Tournament Fighters on the main stage at EVO.Pat: If I was friends with a kid and went over to their place and they always had the codes unlocked to play as these characters, I wouldn't be their friend anymore.Matt: Yeah, I bet you wouldn't.Pat: It's fuckin' bullshit.
- In Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Tournament Fighters, the entire demonstration of the game's final boss, Karai: from destroying the other not-as-broken secret character, Rat King, to the fight between two Karais. Pat's utter bewilderment and Matt, Woolie and Liam's uproarious laughter make the entire segment.
- Tekken Tag Tournament 2:
Matt: WHAT AN AMAAAAZING GAME!
- A heated argument arises between Matt and Woolie over whether this game or Tekken 3 was the best, with Woolie emphatically stating that Tekken Tag Tournament 2 is the better game. The game freezes while he makes his argument.
- Injustice: Gods Among Us:
Pat: But did Hawkgirl's mace take Superman pills? Did the Batmobile take Superman pills? Did Green Arrow's bow and arrow take Superman pills?Matt: Now, the biggest question of all, did Batman shove 50 pills down the gullet of a pig?note
- During one of Pat and Woolie's fights, Woolie picks Zod...and then goes with his Man of Steel skin. His scream of "I WILL FIND HIM!" is the icing on the cake.
- At one point, Matt mentions Black Bolt. Pat confusedly asks who Black Bolt is. Matt enthusiastically declares Black Bolt to be "The best character in anything, ever!"
- The guys have a discussion about the Fridge Logic / Voodoo Shark implications of the game's explanation for how Badass Normals like Batman and Harley Quinn can fight Flying Bricks and Physical Gods like Superman and Shazam on a level playing field. They agree that the street-level characters taking special pills to enhance their combat strength makes sense, but question why this somehow also means the powerhouses can be damaged by weapons, vehicles and environmental objects.
- Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3:
- The entire premise of the video is this on a meta sense. Emphasized by the opening where Liam walks into Woolie's dark house and the traditional music stops playing when he sees Woolie sitting in a ritualistic-like setting, smiling at him. Woolie demanding Liam to "SIT DOWN!" when the latter tries to find an excuse to leave is just the Nightmare Fuel icing on the cake.
- Dead or Alive 5 Ultimate:
- The first five or so minutes are spent with them at the Xbox Live Marketplace due to some bullshit DLC thing that they had to download a catalog in order to continue playing the game, as well as having trouble unlocking the DLC characters. They also go on saying they have been at this currently for a good 50 minutes before the episode, due to having trouble unlocking a certain character and having to re-download her multiple times. When they go back in the game after downloading the catalog and costume pack (which as to add insult to injury, was priced at $29.99), they saw that the other DLC character was not unlocked, requiring them to re-download her again!
- Fist of the North Star:
Pat: "Hm... They seem to be opting for Single Hits!"Matt: [laughing] T-That cracks me up for some reason!
- They give a go playing as Mr. Heart, and they all agree that he's terrible. Cue Matt, Woolie, and Liam all playing as Mr. Heart against Pat, to Pat's dismay and disbelief.
- In the same session, during a particularly scrubby match, they start joking about Japanese players watching the video and thinking it is the hypest shit ever.
- And you can't help but crack a smile when Woolie lands Mr. Heart's Fatal KO on Pat and everyone loses their shit.
- "No, Mr. Heart! The evil Kenshiro will stop you from eating the children for the kids!"
- The Running Gag of getting hit and not performing combos equates to Canadian fighting game tech that Japanese players will study.
- Virtua Fighter 5: Final Showdown:Matt: You're basically insulting his waifu here, you have to understand...Liam: Casca is his waifu! You can't have too many waifu, you'll ruin your laifu!
- Capcom vs. SNK 2: Mark of the Millennium:
Woolie: We've got 30 fighters, 24 of them are shotos.
- Woolie sums up what happens when a fighting game crosssover mostly uses the represented series' main characters.
- Three words sum up their playthrough of the game: "GET THE DICK!"
- Double Dragon / Rage of the Dragons:
Liam: I'm just saying, if his dick fell into my mouth, I wouldn't...ya know...wouldn't.
- While playing Rage of the Dragons, everyone notices how attractive Pepe is.
- Galaxy Fight / Waku Waku 7:
Pat: I think we've really latched onto something with this "skeletons are hilarious" thing!
- The video gives us the world's largest skeleton-based production.
- Super Smash Bros. Melee:
- A bout distills down to Matt vs. Pat, each with one stock, where Matt has a considerable life lead. Liam and Woolie are already calling Matt's victory as Pat starts racking up damage on him, leading to an explosive finale that's too good to spoil.
- Super Smash Bros. Brawl:
- The video has a few moments due to the game's general chaos and quirks, particularly caused by Liam. A crowning moment, however, is an occasion on Pirate Ship, where Liam, as Ganondorf, manages to grab Woolie with his side+B while on the bow of the ship, sending them straight down into the water. While Liam survives because of the swimming mechanics, Woolie gets meteor smashed by the ship and dies too quick for Pat to even realize what happened at first, since he tried a similar thing earlier in the match as Bowser and got no results. Not long after this, he does this again to Matt.
- The opening of Saturday Morning Scrublords, which is a hilarious parody of the usual Fisticuffs opening, featuring such things as Pat struggling to open a bottle of vodka in place of opening a soda, Matt yelling at Liam for forgetting the cookies, and Woolie's arcade stick instantly breaking when it's thrown to him. All set to Groose's theme for added effect.
- Battle Construction Vehicles:
- 'Everything'' about the video, which was the debut episode of Saturday Morning Scrublords. The intro, the hilariously overdone fake British accents, the bizarre combinations of British and Japanese culture they come up with, the oppressively bad controls and gameplay, the entire premise of the game they're playing... leaving out anything would be a crime.
- Guilty Gear Xrd: Sign:Pat: (playing on May's stage) And we're on the S.S. Paedo-boat right now.[cue laughter from all the friends]Woolie: Hey, Johnny's a man of principle.Pat: FUCK THAT GUY!
Liam: It still takes damage.
- Also, anytime that Faust lands his Ass Shove overdrive.
Liam: CROUCHING JAB!
- Whenever they end a match and it looks like one player won, but the other player won instead.
- When they are talking about the character Ramlethal, one of them mispronounces her name as "Ram Lethal", causing the others to comment that Ram Lethal sounds like the name of a male porn star.
- Bushido Blade (1 & 2):
Woolie: Oh, Jesus. Oh, fuck.Pat: Woolie, you usually gravitate towards boss characters, I'd figure I'd give it a shot!Liam: Your fucking face when the machine gun popped up on the screen, I was looking at you!
- In Bushido Blade 2, there is one round between Pat and Woolie where Woolie does not find out the weapon Pat's character uses until a screen shows their weapons crossing. Woolie's weapon is a spear. Pat's is an M-16. There's a brief moment of complete silence before Pat breaks out laughing.
Woolie: Ohhh, the bushido-est of blades!
- And later, their fight between the boss characters of the first and second games. One has a six-shooter, the other has the aforementioned assault rifle. The accidentally have over ten rematches because the matches end in maybe three seconds tops.
- The last match of their Bushido Blade 2 playthrough. Pat picks a regular character whiel Matt picks Katze, the six-shooter-wielding boss character. Everyone expects Pat to just be running around, desperately dodging Matt's shots... cue the Castle Rooftop stage, which allows no lateral movement at all. Matt finishes the first round in three seconds... then Pat finishes the second round in two... then Matt breaks the tie in one.
Liam: Now it's a real match. Now he's out to kill.
- Matt didn't know what WVBA stood for* , so he assumed "Women's Vietnam Bitch Army".
- When fighting the True Final Boss, Donkey Kong, they wonder what other animals the WVBA would resort to putting their boxer against, and Liam suggests putting a boxing glove on each end of a snake.
- Doc Louis unleashing his true power.
- Arcana Heart Love MAX!!!:
- Matt, Pat, and Woolie desperately attempt to not enjoy the game because it's the kind of Moe anime garbage they've gone on record as saying they hate, but to their chagrin, the game turns out to actually be really, really good. It comes to a head when Woolie gives Pat a Big "NO!" when he begins to Squee! over a character's super. Meanwhile you can hear Liam giggling in silence as he hopes that they'll come around to his world.
- Under Night In-Birth Exe:Late:
- When starting the game, Liam has this to say:
- Mortal Kombat: Armageddon:
Liam: What is this swill you're rubbing all over us?
- It's mentioned at some point in the video that they are going through a wine cooler while playing this game. It shows hilariously.
- As a Call-Back to the Under Night In-Birth Fisticuffs, Liam's first words in the video are:
Pat: Having characters that embody concepts is cool, but you can't have an entire region of existence embody a concept!
- Pat's hatred of Havik and Chaosrealm in general.
Pat: It's only the second fucking round!
- At the very end, during the oh-so-epic final battle, the crew starts humming Duel of the Fates. Pat objects.
Matt: Now, Drahmin is a character that I think ca-
- Plus, the return of Stinger Zinger Liam in the Drahmin v. Tanya fight:
Liam: Is he though? Is he a character even?
Woolie: [starts losing it]
Liam: Like, are you gonna sit here and tell me THAT is a character, and not some doodle from the back of your notebook?
Woolie: [loses it harder]
Matt: Alright, alright, I think Drahmin is a concept...
Matt: ...that could've been done better...
Liam: Bo' Rai Cho's only good if he's winning.
- Liam's spamming of Bo' Rai Cho's vomit oil slick in the Motor Kombat mini-game. The constant "HUAALAUAAGH" from the drunken bastard somehow makes it even funnier.
Matt, seconds later: AH, FUCK THE PUKE!
- At the start of the video, they all agree to not pick characters that they like, which predictably means that they stick almost entirely to the roster from 4, Deadly Alliance, and Deception. An argument erupts whenever someone picks someone from earlier in the series, such as Pat selecting Rain.
- Matt drawing everyone's ire when he says that, bad as they were, the PS2-era Mortal Kombat games kept the fighting genre alive in the mainstream.
- Bio F.R.E.A.K.S.:
Woolie: Giant Bomb doesn't haves anything on underboob, but TV Tropes has a page on it.
- During the video, they begin an heated argument on... the origins of the underboob. Woolie takes it to Google:
Pat: Well, Woolie is dead.
- Matt observes the stylistic differences between characters:
- Wu-Tang: Shaolin Style:
Pat: With the Matt, with the Matt way, with the way Matt treats his PS1 discs...
- The video opens with Pat furiously rebutting Woolie's accusation that he doesn't like the opening to Samurai Champloo, and it only goes downward from there. It helps that Pat is completely shitfaced the entire time.
- They never actually play the game. The first seventeen minutes of the video is them attempting to get the game to work, which it doesn't, and the rest of the video is just them playing Third Strike.
- While they try to get it to work:
Liam: Well, these fucking discs would scratch before you opened the box.
Pat: He rubs his dick all over everything in this apartment.
Liam: And his dick is made of razor blades.
Matt: That's how people remember me!
Liam: By the gashes in their butt?
Matt: Uh huh.
Pat: [speechless with laughter]
- Gang Beasts:
Pat: NO!Matt: Aw, you stupid idiot.Pat: [laughing] That took me 4 seconds to kill myself.
- The entire video is hilarity incarnate, but here are some highlights.
- When they get to the "Trucks" level, Pat instantly dies by falling off the truck in an effort to throw Matt off the truck.
Matt: I WIN!!!Pat: Matt wins by default...
- Almost simultaneously, Woolie and Liam both kill each other, so basically Matt won by doing nothing throughout the first round.
Woolie: YES, VICTORY!!! Victory by holding on!Matt: Oh god...Woolie: Just ride into the sunset. Let's go![The camera pans to show Pat hanging on to Woolie's leg]
- In a later round of the same level, Woolie is left hanging off the edge of the side of a truck, with nobody else visible. He declares victory as the camera slowly pans... to reveal Pat hanging onto Woolie's leg. Everybody immediately loses their shit as they both fall off.
Matt: I know now why you cry.[Matt jumps and grabs Liam]Matt: ''[simultaneously] But it's something that I CAN NEVER DO!
- What makes it better is Pat's Big "NO!".
- In the Incinerator level, Liam ends up picking up Matt with one hand, and tosses him into the fiery pit.
- Earlier while hanging on the edge, Matt give us this gem.
- Part 2 is another Bundle of Hilarity.
- Mortal Kombat X:
- The Test Your Luck mode, which adds random modifiers in a battle. Powerful Jump Attacks + Hyper Combat = Matt laughing hysterically.
- Avengers in Galactic Storm:
Liam: It's just a stupid hairy arm!
- Avengers: Battle for Earth, being the monument to great design that it is, let's the player with the Wii Remote control the screen while the player with the Wii U Game Pad is trying to pick characters, resulting in a tug-of-war for control over the game every time. And when Pat tries Liam's patience a little too hard, Liam responds by wiping his hand directly onto Pat's $2000 TV.
- Later, they decide to explore the game's community comments. Hilarity ensues.
- When the guys start playing Galactic Storm, they're immediately baffled by the obscure 90s Avengers and villains that make up the game's roster. When Pat asks who Black Knight is, Liam responds with increasingly ridiculous "facts," such as Black Knight supposedly being Spider-Man's real father and the guy who taught The Punisher how to fight.
- During the first match, Pat summons his Assist Character, Giant-Man, whose attack consists of a goofy-looking gigantic arm that comes in and squeezes the opponent. Matt immediately loses his shit at the sight of this.
Pat: It's weird that they put these keys on the backs of arcade cabs nowadays.
- The guys keep pretending they're playing the game on an actual arcade cabinet instead of admitting to using an emulator. This gets especially funny when Pat asks which key he needs to hit to reset the game:
- After seeing Lilandra in the background of one of the stages, Matt begins quoting lines from the old X-Men cartoon in his best 90s Professor X voice.
- The King of Fighters Maximum Impact 2:
- The video is mostly normal, except that about 22 minutes in, the totally-not-an-emulator PS2, it's real, honest, crashes. After they jump-cut and get the game working again, they try their damnedest to keep from saying that it was an emulator.
- Pat and friends discover Terry Bogard's secret hobby, to their complete incredulity.
- They then have some laughs at the expense of Terry's alternate costume and terrible dub voice.
- Super Fighter:
- Pretty Fighter:
- Enter the Matrix:
Woolie: This is the greatest thing we have ever recorded.
- The final round defies all speculation as to which characters the random selection would choose: Firebird Man and Police Car Man.
- Killer Instinct (Season 2):
Orchid: One step closer to flushing out UltraTech!
- The video ends on a hilarious note:
Matt: NO YOU'RE NOT!
Woolie: That's what you get for picking a fight while the government is foreclosing on my house, nigga!
- Woolie embraces his inner Angry Black Man at the end.
- Dong Dong Never Die:
- The ending, where the game reveals a picture of a PSP, which leads into a preview for the dev team's Streets of Rage 4. Everyone completely loses their shit and expresses their shock that the game actually looks good, while lamenting that Liam managed to miss the one Fisticuffs that was perfect for him.
- Dengeki Bunko Fighting Climax:
"Did you know that Kirito's nickname is that he's a beater?""Fucking Heathcliff is in [Sword Art Online]? The cat?!""The villain is a thirty-five adult man and Kirito is a twelve-year-old, and they have a fight in the parking lot. It's actually really great, and that's why I hate Sword Art so much."
- While playing the game, they take the time to explain moments from certain anime. This ranges from explaining the concept of Black Bullet ("It's an anime where they have to defend their city from the giant monsters outside.") to making constant Berserk references when talking about Sword Art Online (among them is calling Asuna the Casca of Sword Art for multiple reasons) to explaining the "Robo-Baby" (i.e. Yui). Part of the episode's basically people talking about an anime to people who have no idea what said anime's about. Most of it directed at Sword Art Online, as they talk about various plot points from the show.
- SVC Chaos:
- The episode was delayed due to errors in the video. As a result, it is the first Saturday Morning Scrublords episode...released on a Saturday morning.
- Salty Bet: Chapter One:
- The video reaches a whole new level of meta as the intro is the standard Friday Night Fisticuffs intro with raining dollar bills superimposed. The music is replaced with the Sonic Generations version of the Casino Night Zone. In this episode, the Zaibatsu don't play, but rather watch the Twitch stream of computer controlled opponents fight each other. Highlights include:
- Woolie, resident Naruto fan, bets it big on Naruto Kid... only to get curb stomped so hard by Sol Badguy the game quits mid match. Woolie's reaction is Stunned Silence.
- The stream ends abruptly as Twitch AND the Zaibatsu video cut out. The FNF logo appears to signal the end of the video... and stays up for an additional 4 minutes as they count their earnings to see who won. They finally realize the camera is off, and wonder what the audience can see at this point. The Twitch stream was alive and well throughout this, and eventually Salty Bet came back up!
- BlazBlue: Calamity Trigger:
- On Christmas Day, the best friends finally play BlazBlue. Except not. They just watch cutscenes throughout the whole 35:42 video as a magnificent "Fuck You" to people pestering them to play a game they don't want to play. This is made better by the fact that they use the game to watch the cutscenes, meaning they are playing the game. Just not the gameplay part.
- Street Fighter: The Movie: The Game:
The Sound: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH. (often quickly spammed so it's) HU-HU-HU-HU-HU-HU-HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.
- The arcade version of the game gets a lot of mileage because of its ludicrously loud and overcompensating insert-coin noise, which the Best Friends theorize they included specifically to compete with Mortal Kombat's laugh.
Matt: And then, on the scheduled day [Gregg Rainwater]'s supposed to show up for the mo-cap for this piece of shit, they go to his trailer and it's cleared out.Liam: Wow.Matt: And they go like, "Gregg Rainwater, is he gone?" and you hear the sounds of an airplane in the background.
- Matt explains why T. Hawk is one of only two fighters from the movie not present in either version of the game:
- Justice League Task Force:
Matt: Superman was raised by an old man who said "Maybe let the children die."
- The usual Fisticuffs theme song is replaced with a cheesy electronic track from the game.
- Matt has some fun with the character bios.
Pat: It's weird, that part where they show flashbacks of Wonder Woman, like, killing a bunch of children.Matt: She just torches a bus.Pat: She's like "I need to turn these kids into probiotic yogurt."Matt: "I really need it."Pat: That's a Greek joke, for ya.
- Matt jokes that it would be awesome if Zodd the Immortal from Berserk showed up in Batman v Superman, arguing that Zodd probably has a much lower body count than the average DCEU superhero. This then turns into a digression where Matt and Pat come up with fake plot points for the movie, most of which play on the DCEU's negative reputation for being excessively bleak and gritty.
- Guilty Gear Xrd: Revelator:
Woolie: Where's my COCAAAIIINE?
- Every joke that they make about Chipp.
- Although that joke is somewhat Harsher in Hindsight for those who learn that Chipp use to actually be a drug addict (and drug trafficker) before his training.
- Girl Fight:
- After starting to get sucked into the game's plot, despite its fairly... softcore nature, they all lose it upon beating arcade mode as Warchild and getting nothing but a picture of her naked.
- Touhou 12.3 Hisoutensoku:
Woolie: I remember one time I saw that footage of a monsoon on CNN. People were getting crazy extensions on their combos.
- The running joke of Woolie picking boss characters returns, because technically most of the characters in the game were bosses in their introductory game. Woolie gets annoyed to the point where he asks if they stop being boss characters when he puts the controller down.
- Woolie remarks on the the seemingly weird weather effects when he sees that monsoons give ground bounces.
- While checking to make sure they played as everyone* , Woolie remarks that Gardevoir might be in there somewhere, and Pat says that Gardevoir would actually fit in.
- Shrek Super Slam:
Liam: Welcome to Patschwitz, where you have to play by Pat's rules no matter what.
- Liam deliberately messing with the team color in to infuriate Pat.
- Best of Best:
- The game has a wealth of ridiculousness, but the standouts are Tom's Rising Tackle-style move, the Rocketier, and their new terminology for mash punch specials, courtesy of the vaguely-"ethnic" Abdul: the MEGNUM PUNCH.
- BlazBlue: Central Fiction:
- While going through the intro, the Zaibatsu openly admits to not recognizing much of the roster beyond those who appeared in the first game. Cue a perfectly synchronized "Holy shit!" when they first see the character select screen.
- X-Men: Mutant Academy 2:
Matt: "You'll die, Logan, frozen and alone! But I'll track you down, just for the pleasure of burying your bones!"[Woolie doesn't respond]Matt: No? X-Men cartoon?
- Woolie spends the opening minutes of the video insisting he's played this game before and occasionally getting it confused with X-Men: Next Dimension, much to Matt's increasing frustration.
- Matt does a pretty good job reciting an old X-Men TV series quote from memory, and is clearly a little disappointed when Woolie doesn't get it:
Matt: It was really scary as a kid. You're always thinking like "Oh God, I hope I don't get a mind."
- Matt brings up the frequency with which characters on the cartoon used to scream some variation of "My mind!" after being subjected to a psychic attack, and how that used to frighten him as a child:
Woolie: [Spider-Man traps Professor X in webbing] Like...decrease his mobility even more!
- Woolie and Matt play as unlockable characters Spider-Man and Professor X respectively. Spider-Man is pretty reasonable, but ol' Charles... Matt actually can be heard leaning away from the camera, he's laughing so hard.
- Spider-Man apparently lives in the Savage Lands.
- Akatsuki Blitzkampf:
- Woolie starts hyping up Fritz when Pat ends up picking him, going into detail about how the character and his moves work. Less than a minute later, Pat starts saying how he hates the character because he's exactly the kind of fighter Pat hates, while conversely being the kind Woolie loves. Cue Pat ultimately winning the round anyway. Only for Woolie's character, Anonym, to Auto-Revive out of nowhere, an ability Woolie forgot she even had, and take the win away from Pat.
- Jackie Chan in Fists of Fire:
Pat: Why are they all like gilb-like the purple bitch from the ja-from the wa-wa-wa--Willy?Woolie: What are you...Oh, oh! Oompa Loompa-Willy Wonka with the golden—Pat': Willy Wonka, thank you.Woolie: Too many blowberries?Pat: It's blowberries? You're making fun of my for my wallu-wikas and your blau-blow-berry-bli—boy it's been a long day!
- Pat tries to ask a question about the odd choice of skin colors, but has a bit of trouble.
- In addition, this is the first Saturday Morning Scrublords since Liam left. Since he was unabashedly part of the intro, you'd think they'd make a new bit. They do... but it's just an empty shot with no sound until Matt suddenly erupts with the usual "YOU FORGOT THE COOKIES?!"
- Death Cargo:
- The gang spends nearly half the video attempting to figure out how to perform ultra-violent fatality-style finishers even more violent than the ones they already easily activated. When they finally figure it out, they manage to perform it. Only for the video of the gruesome "Deathrip" to not display properly, because Woolie forgot to install the Deathrip video codecs.
- Woolie singing to the game's beat cause Matt to lose it.
- Them all absolutely losing it to Agent Malcolm's Deathrip animation and collectively laughing their asses off due to the sheer absurdity of it.
- Fight of Gods:
- Nidhogg 2
- One of the matches had lasts nearly a fourth of the video's runtime just playing a sloppy tug of war game between a couple screens.
- Kensei: Sacred Fist:
Pat: You trolled yourself Woolie.Matt: Congratulations.Pat: Congratulations.
- Pat calls the game a Tekken clone only for Matt and Woolie to dismiss him. He proceeds to run a search for sites referencing both series and listing off the (many) results (including This Very Wiki) in an increasingly hysterical tone. You can hear Woolie grinning and shaking his head.
- At the start, Woolie attempts to hype the game up to Pat and Matt, saying that he does not know much about it and that he had only ever seen a few screenshots of it and the title, making it sound like some super-obscure gaming artifact. When the intro starts, Matt immediately calls it out as Kensei, to Woolie's surprise. Turns out, he got the Japanese version of the game, titled Bugi (which he pronounces as "boo-gee"), and thought it was a completely different game.
- Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite:
Matt: Like the proble-OH GODDDD, I'VE NEVER SEEN THAT FUCKING ART BEFORE! WHO ''IS'' THAT?!
- How does the Fisticuffs to the long-awaited MvCI start off? With the intro sequence to Scrublords, a first for the channel. Thus begins a cavalcade of mockery.
- Matt has a personal crisis when he witnesses the official render for Frank West for the first time.
Woolie: (laughing) Does Thor have a swastika on his armband?*Pat: Nooooooooooooo... Dude, that's a misspeak, uhh... [random gibberish]Matt: He's a very fine person.
- Woolie has some questions about Thor's Ragnarok-inspired alt costume.
Announcer: Battle without limits!Matt: Actually there were huge financial limits! Like, massive ones!Woolie: [losing it] Battle on a budget!Matt: Battle on a timeline!
- The gang take multiple potshots at the game's clear lack of budget:
- Killing Zone:
Matt: "Oh Woolee be playin' de Killin' Zoone"Patt: "Deh Keel Zone..."Matt: I'm sorry, I tried?
- Playing this old, budget fighting game begins with Woolie declaring it to be one of the most generic fighting game names he's ever heard, commenting that it's the kind of name his mom would think a game would have. Matt and Pat then try to imitate his mother with their best attempt at West Indian accents.
- The announcer saying "Beat you up!" at the start of each round makes the friends lose it, due to him pronouncing it as "BEACHYOURAPP!" There's also the announcer saying "EXCELLENT!".
- Iron & Blood: Warriors of Ravenloft:
- The game is a terrible fighting game, but it nevertheless manages to produce some hilarity. The arena barrier is both highly damaging and has a lot of knockback, while the game's controls are terrible. This leaves the guys in hysterics during one match, when Woolie's heavily armored evil knight does his best Darth Vader impression and declares "I am your master" as he charges headlong into the arena barrier and gets knocked on his ass. Thrice.
- To top it all off, the final match they have ends with a halfling rogue's victory pose, where he taunts and does a backflip... which sends him bouncing off the wall and into a heap on the ground.
Matt: You couldn't even pay me to say how many of their special moves lead to fatalities.
- Woolie and Matt introduce Pat to the game by showing him the incredibly complex control layout, and attempt to explain its infamously difficult fighting system, much to Pat's utter bafflement. The result of this is Pat sitting in long periods of Stunned Silence as Matt and Woolie try to explain them in increasingly complicated detail.
Woolie: Well, some of them lead to weapon breaks, some of them lead to guard breaks, some of them lead to fatalities, some of them lead to stuns. Of which there are multiple types.
Matt: And some of them lead to this game never getting anybody really good at it.
Woolie: Oh, yeah, no, I will not pretend that this is anything you can pick up and learn and play. It's ridiculously impenetrable!
Pat: who-who is this game even for?
- Stick Fight is one of the many non-traditional fighting games that the Zaibatsu plays that due to it's simple physics-based mechanics someohow manage to deliver the biggest laughs.
- Dragon Ball GT: Final Bout
- The intro is a sight to behold, with Super Saiyan hair shopped onto Woolie, Super Saiyan Blue hair shopped onto Matt, Krillin's forehead scar-dots shopped onto Pat, and every noise from the normal Fisticuffs intro dubbed over with sound effects from Dragon Ball Z, with every instance of the three talking, in particular, being dubbed over by random shouting.
- In a not-so-surprising turn of events, Matt as SSJ4 Goku jabs Woolie as SSJ Vegeta to death while Vegeta whimpers like a little boy who scraped his knee.
- For the last few matches, Woolie uses wire frame skins for his characters, baffling Matt and Pat. As they demand to know how he selected those skins, he just tells them to watch GT and learn the lore behind them.
- Dragon Ball Fighter Z:
(Pat beats Woolie)
- After spending the entire video getting his ass handed to him Pat finally gets a victory against Woolie at the end of the video. The salt has to be seen to be believed.
Pat: YES!! Oh god, finally!! (Groans audibly)
Woolie: You alright?
Woolie: (Laughs) Good job!
Pat: I swear to god, even if 10 years from now you're like "you know I let you win on that", I am gonna STAB YOU!! You will get STABBED!!
- Umineko: Golden Fantasia:
(During a match with two particularly vocal characters with high pitched voices)
- Throughout the video, the Zaibatsu, particularly Pat, gets increasingly annoyed at the game's almost constant noise from its characters.
Pat: Oh my GOD!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
- Tough Guy
Matt: This is not my guy! I'm having no part in this!
- Pat and Woolie discovering new tech half way through a fight, screaming mind games every time they catch and throw the other mid attack.
- When they unlock the bonus characters, Matt enthusiastically announces "I see my guy!" and picks an Italian named Wacker because he looks like a Terminator in his portrait art. Then it turns out that his character sprite is wearing a Nazi armband, which slightly upsets Matt but not enough to pick another guy. When Matt confirms his choice, Wacker snaps to attention and does the Nazi salute, revealing that he is more or less sprite Hitler.
- And just to make it worse the first special move Matt does is throwing a giant flaming swastika at the other character. Everyone starts howling with laughter.
- With the first two unlocked boss characters (German Ubermensch Cula and the aforementioned "Italian Hitler" Wacker) setting a clear trend, the Best Friends wonder who the third boss fighter is, if it's not Japan. When it turns out to be a wholesome-looking Nepalese mountain man, they are baffled by the implications.Pat: Nepal is part of the Axis of Evil now?
Woolie: Maybe Japan is just rewriting history?
- Cruz Brothers
Matt: I fuckin' love video games.
- At first, this 2D fighting game looks like a generic, budget boxing/MMA-style game, but quickly proves to be anything but. The characters all have absurd and over-the-top super moves, such as a gangbanger with a Devil Trigger and a SCUBA diver with a Khamehameha-style energy blast. Most of these supers either snap across the stage, are completely unblockable or are simply both, leaving any competitive balance sacrificed for absurd levels of Rule of Cool and the Best Friends in stunned hysterics.
- Just to show how much of a Mood Whiplash the game is, the intro has the music from Friday Night Fisticuffs plays...with the video footage from both Saturday Morning Scrublords and Friday Night Fisticuffs.
- Evening Chaos
Woolie: Pat, I want you to navigate. Let's got and take a look at the options.
- Things get off to a strong start when Woolie decides to introduce the guys to the first bit of the titular chaos.
Pat: Wh— shut up! [Woolie cackles] Why!? Why!?
[after fumbling with controllers, Matt gives it a spin]
Matt: Why!? [Woolie cackles again] Why is it reversed!? Down is up, black is white!
Woolie: Inverted menu.
Matt: [confused] Wait, what? DOWN JUMPS!? DOWN JUMPS!?
- ...and then they actually try playing.
Pat: Fuck, I have so many decades of muscle memory fighting me right now.
- Pat initially thinks the controls are completely inverted, only to realize it was done even less sensibly than that.
- Arena Gods
- Arena Gods has a unique mechanic in that the open sides of the Top-Down arena loop into opposite side; i.e anything going through the right side of the screen will come out of the left side of the screen, and vice versa. The Zaibatsu are introduced to this mechanic in typical Super Best Friends fashion: with Woolie attempting to throw his helmet at Pat, missing him, it passing through the bottom path, coming out the top at the same angle, going through the right side, coming out the left, and because of these shenanigans, Woolie somehow manages to clock himself with his own helmet. This results in the Best Friends bursting out into laughter.Woolie: I see...I see.
- And then immediately after Pat throws a trident at Woolie, it misses, comes out the other side of the screen, and comes this close to killing himself with his own trident, but then it bends, and actually kills Woolie on the loop back.Pat: I didn't d-, I didn't ge-, I didn't control that!! That was automatic!!
Woolie: Alright, alright! That's- oookay, hold on.
Matt: That's a kill!
Woolie: That's gonna take a second...to process.
- And then immediately after Pat throws a trident at Woolie, it misses, comes out the other side of the screen, and comes this close to killing himself with his own trident, but then it bends, and actually kills Woolie on the loop back.
- Arena Gods has a unique mechanic in that the open sides of the Top-Down arena loop into opposite side; i.e anything going through the right side of the screen will come out of the left side of the screen, and vice versa. The Zaibatsu are introduced to this mechanic in typical Super Best Friends fashion: with Woolie attempting to throw his helmet at Pat, missing him, it passing through the bottom path, coming out the top at the same angle, going through the right side, coming out the left, and because of these shenanigans, Woolie somehow manages to clock himself with his own helmet. This results in the Best Friends bursting out into laughter.
- The Risers
- Somehow, the controls were so screwed up that it caused player 1's movement controls move player two and player two's attack buttons to attack with player 1 and vice versa....Matt: This is how we're gonna roll.
- Matt and Pat figure out how to play despite the controls... by not attacking each other.
- Because of the game's muddled graphics, its attempts at Gorn look absurd. The "damage" effects to character models make them look like they're covered in red leopard print, and the sprays of blood and skin look so blocky that the guys at first think their characters are exploding into fountains of hamburger patties and buns.
- Somehow, the controls were so screwed up that it caused player 1's movement controls move player two and player two's attack buttons to attack with player 1 and vice versa....
- Soulcalibur VI: They decide to conclude the session with a fight between created characters, and browse the online selection for two they deem worthy. On their first run-through, they get Viewtiful Joe as their first option, and they choose it without a second thought. Their second competitor takes a little longer to find, but they're ecstatic when they come across Saitama.
- Line-Kill Spirits
- On the long-awaited release week of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, they instead play a doujin fighting game where the only way to deal red health damage is by taking pictures of the opponent's panties. They joke about this replacing Smash's World of Light adventure mode.Matt: Kirby's real low to the ground, he'd be good at it.
- It doesn't help that the game runs very poorly.
- Not even ten minutes in, they all start singing the Smash Ultimate theme song as a coping mechanism.
- The Best Friends argue whether or not posting videos like this one are the reason Youtube channels they brought up are more popular than their own.Matt : We only have ourselves to blame!
- In a slightly morbid fashion, a now-deleted comment on the video predicted what would happen the next week, with an appropriate edit after the fact, paraphrasing:This is what will kill the channel. edit: I WAS JOKING.
- On the long-awaited release week of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, they instead play a doujin fighting game where the only way to deal red health damage is by taking pictures of the opponent's panties. They joke about this replacing Smash's World of Light adventure mode.