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Funny / Strong Bad Email

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The Strong Bad Email series has largely eclipsed the rest of the Homestar Runner body of work in popularity for an admittedly good reason.

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  • The idle animation that plays from the Toons menu. It has Strong Bad answering an email on the Tandy from Stu who writes that he "drank too much salty plum soda". Strong Bad then replies: "No such thing, Stu. No such thing."
  • Strong Bad's rant in the very first sbemail, "Some Kind of Robot", asking him if he takes off his mask and boxing gloves before he goes to bed.
    Strong Bad: Well, that's a stupid question, Abdi. Do you take off your face and hands before you go to bed? And if so, are you some kind of robot? And if so, what kind of powers do you have? Do you use them for good, or for awesome? Would you like to join forces? I just happen to be the greatest criminal mind of our time.
  • In "homestar hair", Strong Bad receives an attachment and is angered to discover that it's a Hairstyle Runner design. He types "delete that crap", and the Tandy does so with the message "crap deleted".
  • "Halloweener" has this gem:
    Strong Bad: And finally, get your mom to make you a Strong Bad costume. You'll be the belle of the ball!
    Homestar: I'm a belle!
    • Earlier, as part of the process of dressing up as Strong Bad, he advises to "take off your shirt to expose your manly chest". Homestar does so, but since he doesn't seem to wear pants, the “manly chest” is pixelated to censor it.
  • In "brianrietta", Strong Bad receives a flattering email from a fan by the name of Brian. Strong Bad appreciates the comments and prepares to write back...
    Strong Bad: (starts typing) Well, Brian, maybe you and I could— (stops) Uh, hey... BRIAN!? What the crap? (resumes typing) Look, man. Unless Brian is short for... Brianrietta or Brian-Sue or something like that it's just not gonna work out between you and me, okay? Sorry to crush your hopes and dreams, Strong Bad.
  • There's just something funny about Strong Bad, Homestar and Pom Pom's attempts to flip people off... even though none of them have fingers (and Homestar doesn't even have arms!).
  • The whole debacle in "sisters" when Strong Bad accidentally deletes an email from a very interested lady and her sister. He spends some time waiting for Ali to send another email while wondering whether she or her sister is hotter. The only other email Strong Bad gets is the following mess:
    Strong Bad: (reading email) "Hello, I am write single to salute and wait for answer again". What? You're not Ali. You're not even... literate.
  • Strong Bad inaugurates the Compy with an email asking what he'd do if he was "invisable" for a day.
    • Strong Bad stealing the boxes of Swiss cake rolls from Bubs.
      Bubs: My chocolates! Come back chocolates, I didn't mean what I said!
    • Homestar gets slugged in the stomach by invisible Strong Bad while he's carrying a box of cake rolls.
      Homestar: Owwww! Those things are bad for you.
    • Strong Bad realizes being invisible isn't so great when Strong Mad sits on him.
  • "50 emails":
    • Strong Bad answering an email from Matt—who calls him "Stong Bad"—about "cool ways to spell different words".
    Strong Bad: Oh, you mean like "strong = stong"? You seem to like that one. Or how about this? "matt = MATT!" (types "matt = DELETED!" and the computer flashes "MATT!!" as it deletes the email)
    • Homestar screwing up the Compy by typing in many attempts to delete an email.
    Compy: FLAGRANT SYSTEM ERROR: The system is down. I dunno what you did, moron, but you sure screwed everything up good.
    Homestar: Uh-oh. This does not look good for Homestar Runner...
  • The "island" email where Strong Bad imagines himself stranded on a deserted island with Homestar. At one point, Homestar starts referencing the buttons on the main page.
    Homestar: Hey, Strong Bad, check this out!
    Strong Bad: Oh, don't start with that
    Homestar: 'Toons! (an ocean liner passes by, tooting its horn)
    Strong Bad: Homestar!
    Homestar: Games! (a large whale covered in blood emerges from the water, squirting its blowhole)
    Strong Bad: Don't do another—
    Homestar: Email! (a plane with a banner reading "WEAR A BIKINI!!" flies by)
    Strong Bad: Ugh!
    Homestar: Man, I love doing that!
  • The "cheat talk" email, where Strong Bad receives an email from "Cory, North Dakota", which Strong Bad assumes is not the name of a person, but of an entire town.
    Strong Bad: (voice echoing like it's coming through a bullhorn) Citizens of Cory! Thank you for your email!
    • He then tries, but fails, to get The Cheat and Strong Mad to say a coherent word, "Douglas". He finally succeeds in getting Strong Sad to say "Douglas" — by jamming his keyboard into Strong Sad's stomach.
  • The "TROGDOOOOOR!!!!" song at the end of "dragon".
    "And the Trogdor comes in the NIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGHHHHHHTTTTT!!!!!!"
    • Strong Bad's reaction to Coach Z's attempt at a dragon, which looks more like some deep-sea fish:
      Strong Bad: I said consummate V's! Consummate! Guy wouldn't know majesty if it bit him in the face...
      Coach Z: That happened once.
    • Meanwhile, Strong Mad has carved "DAGRON" into the surface of a table with an X-acto knife:
      Strong Bad: Strong Mad. You just... keep... doing your thing, man.
    • Homsar appearing in an Easter Eggnote . He's taped a paper with "TASTER'S CHOICE" written on it to the table.
      Strong Bad: Get outta my house!
      Homsar: I do what I'm told.
  • The Strong Bad E-mail "caper". The eponymous caper turns out to involve stealing the Jumble puzzle from Homestar's morning paper. Then the Cheat knocks over a lamp and (sorta) wakes up Homestar:
    Homestar Runner: (half-asleep) Hey Strong Sad, Batman. What are you guys doing in my house?
    Strong Bad: We've been ID'd! Every man for himself!
    (Strong Bad and the Cheat run away screaming)
    Homestar: (still half-asleep) Thanks for coming over to my house, you guys. (beat) Thanks for breaking my cow-lamp.
    • Strong Bad's "The Cheat is Not Dead" song:
    Strong Bad: Seems like just yesterday, we were setting fire to Strong Sad's underwears.
    Strong Sad: That was yesterday!
  • The aptly-named sbemail funny. Strong Bad's idea of answering an email in the "funniest way ever" is to act like a "crazy squeaky guy".
    Strong Bad (While dancing, putting ketchup on his Compy, with a floppy-disk taped to his head) Pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity pongity! Aunt Ruthie! Aunt Ruthie! There's ketchup on the computer! Halzee-WHOOP!
    • Strong Sad's reaction to Strong Bad standing in front of him, doing a jerky dance and shouting gibberish:
      Strong Sad: Stop that. You're freaking me out! Have you been taking some of my pills again?
  • Several from the email "sibbie", starting with Strong Bad receiving an email from the titular email sender "Sibbie" commenting on writing a song about Fhqwhgads...
    "Whoa, spelled 'Fhqwhgads' right. You wouldn't believe how many I get where they're like, 'Hey Strong Bad, I love your fubugrass,' or 'Dear Strong Bad, where's that fuguman?'"
    • ...and then asking him to write a song about Sibbie, too, which irritates him:
    Strong Bad: Ugh, you people and your demands! Look, I'm not here to fulfill your every freakin' whim, all right? Make a song about me! Send Trogdor over to my house! Put on a purple thing and dance around! Well, I've had it! I will never, ever, ever, ever, ever make a song about the sibbie.
    (Suddenly, a beat plays in the background)
    Strong Bad: And I will never, ever, ever, ever, ever write a song about— Hey, what?! Where's that beat coming from?
    (It turns out to be from The Cheat, who is playing a keyboard)
    Strong Bad: Oh, look who thinks he's Clever Dan. What are you trying to do, man? Get outta here!
    (The Cheat leaves)
    Strong Bad: Well, that brought this email to a screeching halt. My focus is all... crocused.
    • Somehow, this results in SB making the song anyway...
      Announcer (on the radio): And coming in at number 4, that was Strong Bad with "Song About Sibbie."
      Strong Bad:: I didn't write a song about Sibbie! The Cheat just started playing some beat! I mean, I wasn't even— I didn't mean to— It was never my intention to— I FREAKIN' HATE SIBBIE!!!
      Announcer (on the radio): And debuting at number 3, it's Strong Bad with "I Freakin' Hate Sibbie!"
      Strong Bad (on the radio): I freakin' hate Sibbie...
      Strong Bad: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! (piledrives radio, kicks it, then suplexes it. He then pants heavily and his eye twitches.)
      Homestar: Thanks, man. I've just about had it with that talking toaster.
    • In an Easter egg, Strong Bad is trying to teach the other characters to say the word "Fhqwgads".
      Strong Bad: "Fhqwgads."
      Homestar: "Fubugrass."
      Strong Bad: Say it with a flourish. "Fhqwgads."
      Homestar: "Fooboomagoo."
      Strong Bad: It doesn't sound like it looks. "Fhqwgads."
      Coach Z: "Forhorglingrads!"
      Strong Bad: Coach Z, I thought I asked you to leave, like, an hour ago.
      Strong Mad: "DOUGLAS!"
      Strong Bad: Whoa! We've had a breakthrough! You get a gold star.
  • In "the process", The Cheat lights Bubs' left foot on fire and makes him step in a beehive with the other.
    Bubs: Ooh! Hot mama! YEOW! Hot bees!
  • The e-mail stunt double, in which Strong Bad is asked if he ever uses a stunt double. He shows footage from Dangeresque 2: This Time It's Not Dangeresque 1 in an attempt to persuade us that "The stunts I do are so... done by me." Needless to say, his stunt double - Strong Sad - is painfully obvious.
  • In "kids' book", Strong Bad defaces an old children's book on diversity into a load of nonsense and cartoonish violence.
    • "Some people are very tall. Quincy is very tall" becomes...
      Some people are very tall and merciless. Quincy is destroying San Antonio.
    • "Some people have red hair. Albert has red hair" becomes...
      Some people have rigged the enemy base with explosives. Albert has.
    • "Some people have curly hair. Hilary has Curly Hair" becomes...
      Some people are being fangoriously devoured by a gelatinous monster. Hilary's legs are being digested.
    • At the end of the children's book in question, he edits the closing words, "Everyone is different. No two people are the same", so that it becomes...
      Everyone is different. No two people are not on fire. Awwww.
    • In an Easter Egg, Strong Bad defaces the original Homestar book. It's especially funny to hear him narrate it in the DVD version.
      Everybody throws shot puts at the Homestar Runner. He is bleeding pretty bad.
  • "couch patch":
    • Strong Bad trying to print out a million dollar bill.
      Strong Bad: (typing on computer) "Print out million dollar bill.exe".
      Computer message: Bad command or file name
      Strong Bad: What? Oh. (typing again) "No for real, print me out a million dollar bill, man.exe".
      Computer message: Syntax error
      Strong Bad: (typing one more time) "Um, this time really print me out a million dollars bill.nofoolin'".
      Computer message: Cut it out, you
      Strong Bad: What the—!? Don't give me none of that cross-talk! Oh well, it was worth a try. Now onto... (groans) onto the email.
    • After everyone gives their wildly different accounts on where the patch came from, an anonymous witness who is very obviously Coach Z gives the scoop in a digitally altered voice.
      Coach Z: Strong Bad had me over for gumbo one night and I don't know what kind of doo-doo meat he was using in there, but I had to PUKE! So I went downstairs and I noticed this little rip in the couch, so I PUKED IN IT! (crying) I'm sorry for what I done!
    • Strong Bad tries to tell the Compy to make Homestar's head explode. The Compy shoots back with "No can do."
      Strong Bad: Oh, crap! This computer is worthless.
    • The Cheat's head explodes in an Easter Egg.
      Homestar: Dang, The Cheat. That computer's got something against you. Did you ever, like, pour Mountain Dew all over it?
  • The sbemail "caffeine," where Strong Sad has become (and stays) completely hyperactive due to drinking orange juice laced with Sanka, as part of Strong Bad's project done on him for a science fair, especially when he starts slapping Coach Z.
    Strong Bad: In the final stages, the subject became erratic, violent and really funny to watch.
    • At the end, the caffeine wears off, and Strong Sad proceeds to crash, hard.
      Strong Bad: (showing off his test results at the fair) At this point, the test subject was dead.
      Strong Sad: (in the audience) I'm not dead!
      Strong Bad: Shut up. And all this data can only bring us to one conclusion: Strong Sad's adopted.
      (Audience gasps.)
      Strong Sad: That's not true, either!
    • The whole thing gets funnier when you realize that Sanka is decaf.
    • Then there's Strong Sad babbling on to Strong Mad while hanging from the ceiling.
      Strong Mad: GET DOWN.
      Strong Sad: No!
      Strong Mad: GET DOWN!
      Strong Sad: No-no! (Beat) Parakeet.
      Strong Mad: (genuinely startled, for once not using his No Indoor Voice) Did you just say "parakeet"?!
    • Strong Sad just abusing Coach Z is hilarious unto itself.
      Strong Sad: (constantly slapping Coach Z in the face, and stealing his cap) Hey Coach Z! Hey Coach Z! Whaddaya got? Whaddaya got for me? How about that? Wanna play some soccer? Some hockeyjock? I got whatever it takes! Hey, ya want some salad? Pasta salad? Tuna salad? Fruit salad?
      Coach Z: (as Strong Sad slaps him) Woo! Woo! Cut that out! Don't hurt me! I don't wanna die! I'm just an old man! Ooh! Ooh!
      Strong Sad: Fruit salad! Fruit salad! Fruit salad! (crashes from high) Salad... (powering-down sound) ...Salad as a rock? Um... Coach Z, what are we doin' here?
      Coach Z: You was tryin' to jank me!
  • The sbemail "monument" has Strong Bad reveal that the Strong Badia sign was supposed to be the right foot of a monument to him, but "something" caused them to stop work on it right as they finished that part.
    Singers: Here comes the Thnikkaman!
  • In "stupid stuff", Strong Bad literally grumbles Kevin Grumbles' last name. He then makes a bet with Kevin Grumbles that if Strong Bad can make Homestar say something smart, he gets some Grumblecakes. While his vain attempts to get Homestar to say something smart are funny on its own, perhaps the funniest one is this exchange:
    Strong Bad: (to self) Maybe if I employ a little reverse psychologies... If I ask a stupid enough question, I'll get an intelligent answer! (to Homestar) I say there, Homestar, butt's twelve by pies?
    Homestar Runner: Ooh, yes! I got Strong Bad to say something stupid! The Grumblecakes will be mine! (walks off)
    Strong Bad: What?! What the crap just happened?! Is it possible that I was just... outsmarted by Homestar Runner?! I'LL GET YOU, KEVIN (grumbles)!!!
  • Strong Bad explaining why Strong Mad doesn't have his own series of cartoon shorts in "The Facts".
    Strong Bad: Fact #1: The guy's got a pretty tenuous grasp on the English language. For examplé... (calls out) Hey, Strong Mad! What's, uh, what's my favorite movie?
    Strong Mad: GARBLEDINA!
    Strong Bad: (typing on his computer) Fact #2: "Garbledina".
    • "He's like a big square, this guy! I'm not sure what this has to do with him not having his own cartoon...But, it's just weird is all. Unsettling."
      • "I guess if he lived in Cubeland, it'd work. But...since Cubeland is place I just made up, so on to fact #4."
    • "Have you seen his computer?" (Cut to Strong Mad's "Computer", which turns out to be nothing but a cardboard box with a crudely drawn picture of a computer on it.)
      Strong Mad: E-COMMERCE! E-BUSINESS!!
    • Another reason Strong Mad can't have his own cartoon show is his lack of volume control. Once again, Strong Bad demonstrates...
      Strong Bad: (softly) Hey, biggest bro, Mom says to keep it down 'cause Baby Strong Sad is sleeping.
    • Still another reason Strong Mad can't have his own cartoon show is because of his directorial inexperience, as evidenced in his cartoon "Doug the Dino".
      Strong Bad: You see? Misguided direction, no comedic timing, and the script is riddled with gaping plot holes.
    • At the end, Homestar asks Strong Bad to give him his own cartoon show, but again, Strong Bad disagrees:
      Strong Bad: A cartoon starring you would be horrible. It'd just be you saying "Sewiously" all the time, and acting like a moron. (Beat) All the time.
      Homestar: No, no, not no more. I got a new catchphrase. Would you like to hear it?
      Strong Bad: No.
      Homestar: I'd be all the time saying, "That's bupkis!" (suddenly speaks more softly) Oh, sorry. "That's bupkis."
      Strong Bad: What're you whispering for?
      Homestar: Because, Baby Strong Sad is sleeping.
      Strong Bad: Now, you see this disgusting little chitchat we're having here? This is what your cartoon would be like.
      Homestar: And then it'd be a number-one hit. (sings) And that's the end of my show! Donk!
  • All of the Stylistic Suck moments in "dangeresque 3", including but not limited to:
    • Strong Bad's "car phone" being a giant VHS player with a phone cord poorly sticking out of it.
    • Coach Z's first scene as Renaldo:
      Coach Z: Now?
      Strong Bad: Yeah, go, go!
      Coach Z: (finishing up with Dangeresque) plan. (to Strong Bad) How was tha—
    • The "climbing" sequence which is just Homestar and Strong Bad walking on a piece of wood with windows drawn on it, rotated at a 90 degree angle. Then Homestar's Cool Shades fall off and drop "sideways".
    • "Istanbul", which is just the field with the Cheat off to the side wearing a sign that says "Istanbul".
    • Coach Z holding up a newspaper with a piece of paper taped over it that says "PERDUCCI IS THE BAD GUY".
  • "Crying":
    • There's just something very funny about seeing Homestar and The Cheat on the ground, reduced to tears by being shown a picture of a dog with only one leg.
      Homestar: That little guy. He's got the heart of a champion! You're gonna make it, Li'l Brudder! You just keep scrapin' along!
    • In fact, even though Strong Bad's drawing was meant to make anyone cry, the concept of a one-legged dog trying to make it on his own and become a quarterback is so over-the-top that it's actually pretty funny.
  • The entire email "for kids:"
    • Strong Bad somehow getting a score of -45 playing Peasant's Quest.
      Strong Bad: Uh, let's see here... (types) Make friends with Kerrek.
      Text Box: The Kerrek says he has enough friends already. And he doesn't like your short, short pants.
      Strong Bad: What the!? Um... (types) Buy Kerrek a cold one.
      Text Box: (as the Kerrek smashes Rather Dashing on the head) The Kerrek is a teetotaller and is offended by your offer. He pounds your head into the ground. You dead.
      Strong Bad: WHAT!? Aw, man! Stupid game!
    • Strong Bad's meltdown when the kids can't find the barely-hidden The Cheat.
      "Look, The Cheat is behind the freakin' box! (screaming) HE'S BEHIND THE BOX! I'LL KILL YA!! I'LL KILL ALL YOUR DOGS!!"
    • Homsar's kids' show, "Whaddaya Know, Haddi-Man?", is probably not too far off from some of today's kids' shows.
      Homsar: (seeing the letter G) I'm not gonna lie to you, that's a healthy piece of real estate!
    • Strong Bad's reaction to Homsar's show:
      "Good gravy. I got two words for the children that are raised on that crap: HELD BACK. REPEATING THE THIRD GRADE. LOW STANDARDIZED TEST SCORES. I GUESS THIS WAS MORE THAN TWO WORDS. THE PAPER, PLEASE TAKE US HOME."
  • "montage", which features:
  • "virus":
    • Strong Bad's virus-scanning software finding 423,827 viruses on the Compy: "A New Record!!"
      Strong Sad: (accusingly) Did you get a virus?
      Strong Bad: Uhhh, noo...
      Strong Sad: Did you get four hundred thousand viruses?
      Strong Bad: Yes... (despairing) very yes!
      • Making it funnier, Strong Sad's head is a cycling of his avatars from his blog.
    • "Computer over? Virus equals Very Yes?! That's not a good prize!"
    • "I CAN'T SPELL YOU!"
    • "And the Compy...just peed my carpet."
    • The King of Town getting repeatedly slapped by The Ugly One. "No! Please! Stop! I'm old! And fat! And rich! And cool!"
    • "It's in a better place, Strong Bad. Rather, it's in the same place, but now it's got a big hole through it!"
    • Homestar Runner wanders in and tries to fix the Compy.
      Homestar: Your super box needs wordsnote . (Homestar's head falls off) Like these right here!
      (Homestar begins picking up options from the navbar beneath the video.)
      Homestar: Gotta have this one, and this one, and this-a this-a this one...
      Strong Bad: No, wait, stop! THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE POSSIBLE!
  • "Animal".
    • The overly-dramatic introduction of Strong Bad's new computer.
      Strong Bad: It is a time of desolation, chaos, and uncertainty. Brother pitted against brother, babies havin' babies. Then one day, from the right side of the screen, came a man... a man with a plastic rectangle. I mean laptop computer!
    • Da Huuuuuudge! "Ew! No! No Huuuuuudge!"
      Marzipan: Oh, wow! Look at Da Huuuuuudge!
    • "I say there, monstrosity, do you know the times?" Followed by Monstrosity-Strong Bad gurgling incoherently.
      Strong Bad: I guess I couldn't really talk with that proboscis. Not that I'd have much of an answer for "Do you know the times," anyway.
    • The Red Steckled Elbermung brings up an alphabet-book style illustration saying "E is for Red Steckled Elbermung". When Strong Bad says "No, no, no!", three "No"s appear as labels for parts of its body.
    • "Uh....The Pardack? WHAT THE!? Why do these keep coming out as nasty blob things!?"
    • "Sterrance is way cuter than that stupid, ugly, old, washed-up The Cheat I used to have."
    Strong Bad: Oh, Captain Past His Prime himself. Yeah, I know you heard me, and I stand by it! (The Cheat leaves in a huff)
    • Then after The Cheat leaves, Strong Bad talks to his computer: "Don't worry, Lappy. That's just The Cheat. He uses new computers." (scoffs)
  • origins has Strong Bad giving the origin of Bubs' Concession Stand
    Strong Bad: Señor Havin' A Little Trouble and Mr. Bland were by far the most popular characters. (Bubs' Concession stand falls on them) Then, they were crushed by a falling Bubs' Concession Stand.
    Bubs: (appears in the stand's window) "Hot time!"
    Strong Bad: said Bubs.
  • long pants has Homestar Runner wearing pants — Daisy Dukes, no less!
    Strong Bad: Let's talk about your pants — or your lack thereof, Daisy Dukes aside.
    Homestar Runner: What are you talking about, Strong Bad? I wear long pants.
    Strong Bad: Um... no, from what I can tell, you wear no pants and have blue soles glued to the bottoms of your feet.
    Homestar Runner: W—Well, that's simply not true. I have long pants, I wear long pants. I'm a long pants man, long pants, long pants!
    • And then there's the long pants freakout...
      Homestar Runner: [jumps onto the desk] Long pants, Strong Bad! The longest pants! Everybody everybody! Longest pants! [Teleports all over the room between each word] Long long long long long long pants!
      Strong Bad: Oight! Ah! That's it! We need to get you some serious clown care, man!
      Homestar Runner: But I was told long pants! Long pants! They said long pants! Always long pants! Long, my pants! Gleaming pants! [Background turns red] Glorious pants!
    • After his rant, Homestar bolts off, and all that's left are his "pants", that land on Strong Bad's leg. SB freaks out, trying to get the Daisy Dukes off, and The Cheat appears to burn the article of clothing out of existence.
    • In an Easter Egg, we see Homestar crying over the whole ordeal and Marzipan trying to console him:
      Homestar Runner: (sobbing) Loooong paaannnts!
      Marzipan: Aw, there, there, Homestar. It's not so bad. Everybody thinks I'm a broom.
      Homestar Runner: (surprised and upset) You're not a broom?!
    • And before all that, Strong Bad uses a "light-pen" (read: some correction fluid) to edit down the overly-verbose e-mail:
      Strong Bad: "Why wear pants? Creepy pants all the time get some. Maybe parachute, maybe clown care. Some ants toot, Clanky." Now there's an email worth answering! "Some ants toot," tee hee!
    • At the end, Strong Bad tries to remove the fluid from the screen, to no avail.
      Strong Bad: The Cheat! Call tech support and tell 'em you broke the Lappy again!
  • "Rampage": Strong Bad and Strong Mad going on a "reading rampage". Strong Mad is reading a waffle with "BUG" written on it in syrup.
    Strong Mad: THIS BOOK IS TOO LONG!
  • The climax of the Sbemail do over, where Strong Bad repeatedly smashes Homestar dressed as The Cheat with his keyboard, and Strong Mad thinks it's actually The Cheat.
    Strong Mad: DON'T HURT THE CHEAT!!!
    Strong Bad: No, big guy, that's not The Cheat. That's Homestar! From school!
    Homestar: Meedley mee! I'm The Cheat! I'm not from school! Moooooo!
    [Strong Mad grins broadly in reaction]
    Strong Bad: Uh, The Cheat's not a cow, you know... Whoa!
    [Strong Mad picks up Strong Bad by the ankles and starts shaking coins out of him, which Homestar proceeds to eat.]
    Strong Bad: Strong Mad! Put me down! You're making a terrible stnank!
    Homestar: It makes me all jangly inside! [Homestar shakes his torso, and the coins he ate make jingling noises]
  • Strong Bad discovering what he's in the record book for: "Dirtiest diapey—WHOA! COUGH COUGH COFFEE EGGS BACON. Oh, too bad. I accidentally made breakfast all over whatever that record was for."
    • When Strong Bad is making his own record book, Strong Sad submits a grain of rice he transcribed Paradise Lost on to — in four languages, even. Strong Sad wins the record, for being the Biggest Waste of Dump. The cherry on the cake is the photo of him smiling through the magnifying glass.
    • Next, the King of Town eats a gigantic pile of salt (including a salt shaker); Strong Bad thinks he has a bad case of hiccups afterwards, but the King tells him they're actually heart attacks. This gets the King the record for "Least Healthiest (Man?)"
  • In "modeling", Strong Bad is addressed as "STRONG BAD!!!!!" Strong Bad reads it by shouting his name at the top of his lungs. He then does the same when he addresses the sender.
  • "portrait", starting with the vicious ripping apart of the sender ("Dylan Braggers, AKA Coolio da Fabio"):
    Strong Bad: Guess what? Nobody calls you Coolio da Fabio, AKA Quit Makin' Up Nicknames For Yourself! I'm just gonna call you "Dealin' Burgers", which I assume doubles as an accurate job description.
  • "highschool"
    • Strong Bad's recollection of middle school turns out to be a parody of Muppet Babies.
    Baby Strong Bad: I'm pretending I'm playing better video games. (game beeps) Aw man! That freakin' duck swallowed both my pixels!
  • In "secret identity", Strong Bad attempts to persuade the audience that he is secretly the Poopsmith, but the Poopsmith is already behind him, as is Homestar.
    Strong Bad: Is there a sign on my door that says, "WANTED: Everyone I hate! Inquire within."?
    King of Town: [Suddenly enters and walks toward Strong Bad] I didn't see one.
    Strong Bad: WGHT! WH... [Turns back to his computer and continues the email before the King of Town reaches him] So apparently, I'm not the Poopsmith.
    • Homestar's pseudonym of "Mr. Dee Williams."
    • The ending, where Strong Bad literally throws Homestar and the King of Town out of his house. SB then prods the Poopsmith with a fondue fork.
      Strong Bad: Get Out!. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out!
    • The obligatory Easter egg at the end has Homestar pondering the possibility of getting his own "pseudoname", which brings out a crazed Strong Sad speaking rapidly (no doubt on caffeine again).
      Strong Sad: It's "-nym"! It's "-nym"! It's "psuedonym", not "psuedoname"! I can't take it anymore! "Nym", "nym", "nym"! It's a Greek word for "name"! Pseudonym! Psuedonym!
  • The sbemail "cliffhangers" is all about the Cliffhanger Copout. The first is an excellent example for its sheer pointlessness: Coach Z has the Thnikkaman tied up and shoved into a locker, discussing his plan to take of the latter's shades. As Coach Z makes his move, the toon pauses and zooms in on his hand. It then resumes with Coach Z falling on the ground, with the Thnikkaman saying "Yeah, shut up, Coach!", and leaving, after which his high-pitched singers chime in with "You missed unmasking the Thnikkaman! (Beat) Because you have really bad hand-eye coordination!"
    Coach Z: Enough already, I get it! My secret sorcret has been revearled...
    • Another example comes later, with Homestar telling Strong Sad something truly shocking: he's pregnant! Again, the toon pauses and zooms in on Homestar's head, then immediately resumes.
      Strong Sad: No, no, you're Homestar. Runner. The male.
      Homestar: (quite relieved) Oh, phew! Thought I was a pregnant woman for a second there.
      Strong Sad: Yeah, uh... I think I'd like to have my money back now.
  • "strong badathlon":
    • Since beating the crud out of Homestar is an event in the Badathlon, you'd expect SB to be the reigning champion...except the actual champion is someone who has a very intimate knowledge of Homestar's exact weak points: Homestar himself.
    • The "Remote Put":
      Text on TV: Ready? Cute little girl from sitcom sings patriotic song.
      Strong Bad: Dargh, I freakin' hate that little kid! Why'd they ever bring her on the show?!
      [he throws the remote at the wall, where it shatters and the batteries fall out.]
      Strong Bad: What?! These games are fixed! Check the East German's pants! Check—[cut]
    • Followed by the "Clean and Jerk... Strong Mad's Underwears... Over his Head"note :
      [Strong Mad's underwear is sticking out of the top of his singlet.]
      Strong Bad: Uhh, are you trying to tell me that this man doesn't already have a wedgie of illegal proportions?
      Coach Z: Nope, that's the reggalation starting point!
      Strong Bad: That's it. I'm boycotting these games.
      Strong Mad: THANK THE LORD!
  • From the sbemail unnatural:
    • Strong Bad's PSA parody on "anonymous apostrophe fling[ing]."
    • After a Kaiju-sized Bubs (dubbed "King Bubsgonzola Supreme") nearly crushes SB and the Cheat, Strong Bad attempts to come up with an explanation of how the former came to be:
      Strong Bad: It's a giant Bubs from outer space! Or... mutated by radiation! Or... from the depths of the ocean! Or... flushed down the toilet!
    • Homestar Runner somehow convincing himself, thanks to an oddly-specific fortune cookienote , that rather than Bubs turning into a giant, everyone else in Free Country USA has been turned into ants.
      Homestar Runner: C'mon, everyone. Let's go steal a slice of chocolate cake from that picnic table over there.
    • Homestar continues to run with this idea all through the e-mail.
      Homestar Runner: We must protect the queen! I have six legs!
    • "We needed an organized forum for people to shout their ideas all at the same time!"
    • The reveal that Bubs grew giant because he flushed himself down the toilet while he was shaving. SB's and Coach Z's reactions are really quite amusing.
      Strong Bad: You have to shave?
      Coach Z: You have a terlet?
    • At the end, in an Easter egg, Strong Bad is trying to flush himself down a toilet as The Cheat watches.
      Strong Bad: (eagerly, to The Cheat as the toilet stops flushing) Try it again. I think I'm starting to mutate. (The Cheat flushes the toilet again) Wheeee!
  • the movies has Strong Bad lose his cool when everyone else ignores the "No Talking or Phones" Warning, finally snapping completely when Homestar constantly attempts to make small talk with the characters in the movie (as opposed to shouting "Don't go in there!" or "Oh, no, he di'nt!"), whereupon Strong Bad pulls a rocket launcher out of nowhere and holds it up to his head like a cell phone, then sings the Nokia ringtone into it.
    Strong Bad: Ohhhh, deedle-lah-doh daddle-lah-doh deedle-lah-doh die!! *fires the rocket launcher and blows up the theater*
    • Strong Sad rattling off movie trivia.
      Strong Sad: Ooh, and he had a cameo as Stevedore number 2 in the prequel, and he was in that car commercial with the wisecracking transmission, and he has a Bacon number of 4!
      Strong Bad: (holding up his fist at Strong Sad) And this is my fist! You might remember it from "Bloodied Pulp: The Amazingly True Story of Your Face in Five Seconds"!
      Strong Sad: He was in Dangeresque 1 and 2!
  • In "looking old", Strong Bad asks his "marketing team" for advice on how he can make himself Younger and Hipper.
    • The Cheat suggests "youth through editing", redoing the opening of the email with "quick cuts", "incessant music", and "disorienting close-ups" in a way that leaves Strong Bad dazed.
      Strong Bad: Oh, The Cheat... I don't know whether to puke or have a seizure...
    • Bubs suggests they take advantage of young people's fondness for "anything with a lowercase 'i' in front of it". Strong Bad shoots that idea down because "We already tried that with lowercase 'e's back in the late '90s. We all know where that got us." Cue a cutaway to a warehouse full of unsold crates of "eStrong Vague Online Investments".
    • Marzipan (who's there for "legal reasons") starts going on about "sprucing up" Strong Bad's face as if it were someone's yard.
      Strong Bad: (sarcastic) Oh, this'll work great, Marizpan... IF I WAS A BACKYARD!!
    • Finally, there's Strong Mad's suggestion:
      Strong Mad: (puts out a school-style diorama with a diaper taped to it labelled 'WERE A DIPER!') WEAR A DIAPER!
      Strong Bad: Uh, nice try, bo-hwee-moth, but that's a little younger than I was looking to go.
  • "your funeral", when Strong Bad's prerecorded eulogy plays, but Coach Z tapes over it accidentally with one of his raps. While the rap is playing, Bubs stares angrily at a deeply ashamed Coach Z, who starts awkwardly dancing to the beat.
    • And then Homestar tears up while doing a reading from "the book of Phone".
    • Strong Bad coming back from the dead to prevent "my leotard-ed brother from prancing about in my honor."
      Strong Sad: But you never got to see my Chaup au Fan!
      Strong Bad: You keep your chappy thong to yourself, mister!
  • "mini-golf"
    • "Sweet Puttin' Cakes! And, yes, it's every bit as messed up as the cartoon on which it's based."
    • Coach Z at "the 18th hole", which "puts a unique twist on the standard bottomless-hole-that-sucks-your-golf-ball-away-forever... hole":
      Coach Z: (putts his ball into the hole, causing it to drop down from above and land in front of him) Oh, I guess I forgort to port... (tries again, same result) Oh, I guess I forgat to prat! (cycle repeats) Oh! Gorka-fa-pork!
      Strong Bad: This will go on forever if you let it.
    • Strong Bad talking about the "blue water" hole and how kids tend to drink out of it or pee in it...or, worse, both.
      Homestar: I didn't find my ball, but I did see some exotic marine life.
      Strong Bad: Homestar, all that's down there is cigarette butts!
      Homestar: (Holds up a bra) And a bra!
      Strong Bad: Sweet!
    • Strong Bad and The Cheat finally returning home after simply willing themselves home.
      Strong Bad: Whoa! That was weird. (smacks lips) My mouth tastes like... backwards.
      (The Cheat makes some squeaking noises)
      Strong Bad: Your mouth tastes like what?
      (The Cheat grins, showing that his teeth had been dyed blue by the "blue water")
      Strong Bad: The Cheat, you didn't!
  • hygiene has Strong Bad make a cruddy hygiene movie about the sender of the e-mail he got, instead of just making one for him. It features Homestar as John, "a cruddy fifth grader" with bad hygiene, and Strong Bad as Gene, a popular fifth grader with perfect hygiene. It's every bit as self-inserty as it sounds, up to John having rare South American moths living in his mouth, and Gene's mouth being a national park. In the end, John reinvents himself at an out-of-state college, and Gene spends the rest of fifth grade miserably struggling to keep up his perfect reputation. Bye, Gene!
  • Strong Bad's spazz-attack on getting an e-mail from a hot college girl in pizza joint.
    Yes! We have a pizza joint! I gots me a pizza joint! Always been at the pizza joint! Come to the pizza joint with me!!
    • The Cheat's original idea for the pizza place's name is "Strong Bad's Strong Badian PIZZ—", but Strong Bad stops him before he can finish, insisting that the pizza place's name is too long and that girls want a name that's short and catchy. To illustrate his point, he shows a sketch of Teen Girl Squad, showing Daphne meeting the TGS:
      Daphne: (wearing a towel) Hey, gals! Let's towel off and meet up at Strong Bad's Strong Badian pi—
      Cheerleader: This is taking too long!
      What's Her Face: I'm already bored!
      So and So: I'm going home!
      The Ugly One: (inexplicably dressed as a mummy in a sarcophagus) I belong in a museum!
    • "The Cheat, in our effort to make a pretend pizza place in order to score some chicks, we somehow created a successful and well-reviewed actual pizza place!"
    • The sequence.
      "You're not Daphne, you're... pizza trolls! Flame war!!"
    • The fact that The Cheat's own pizza joint is in the King of Town's Grill.
    • Strong Sad's Review Revue, in which he critiques The Pizz,, and the whole email itself.
      Strong Sad: Strong Bad phones this one in with Strong Bad Email 179. Despite a strong showing from fan favorite Strong Sad, the email ultimately fizzles due to a heavy reliance on what can only be referred to as 'internet pizza jokes'.
  • The entirety of "yes, wrestling" (#183), an extended, spot-on parody of professional wrestling gimmicks. Highlights include Strong Bad as "Sir Boliver Turnbuckle, Master of the 1/8 Nelson," the insidious Mr. Cheatayama,note  and Strong Bad inviting Homestar/The Jack-'Em-Up Kid for an in-ring interview, only to clock him with a folding chair.
  • From email 185, "nightlife":
    Strong Mad: NAME, PLEASE!
    Strong Bad: Come on, man, drop the act! I gotta get into the pwawty cloughb!
    Strong Mad: [peering at a Blubb-O's bag] YOU'RE NOT ON THE LIST!
    Strong Bad: The list? You're lookin' at a greasy bag of fast food!
    Strong Mad: DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF! [laughs Adorkably]
    Strong Bad: Wait, what? Strong Mad, did you just make a joke? That was pretty good!
    • Also, Homestar sleepwalking into the club in the middle of a dream about being a Girl Scout, and getting into an argument with Strong Bad about how many cookies he sold.
  • In environment, we see Marzipan wasn't exaggerating when she said Strong Bad's laptop is so out-of-date with environmental standards it causes a brown-out every time he hits the enter key.
    Homestar: I'm about to win!
    (power goes out)
    Homestar: Aw...
    (power comes back on)
    Homestar: I'm about to win!
    (power goes out)
    Homestar: Aw...
    (power comes back on)
    Homestar: I'm really about to win!
    (power goes out)
    Homestar: Again with the "Aw..."
    • A whole new layer of funny is added when a shot of the TV set reveals that Homestar hasn't even put in a game cartridge.
  • The dueling fanfiction by Strong Sad and Strong Bad in sbemail #188.
    Strong Bad: "Twelve-Times-A-Day Man"? You can't just start makin' up terrible new characters!
    Strong Sad: (narrating) ...he said, putting on a bonnet, and giving Homestar a deep-tissue massage.
    Strong Bad: Aah! No!!
    Homestar: (delighted) Oh, this gon' be good!
    • "Just then, Homestar traipsed in naked as a jaybird!"
    • Even better, Strong Sad is looking away from him.
      • The fact that they pronounce Twizzlers with an exaggerated accent ("Tweezzlérs") just makes the fanfic even funnier.
    • Strong Bad's tangent about how adding "club" to words usually improves them:
      Strong Bad: For instance: turkey = (the word is typed in a dull brown color; other voices groan) mrenh, turkey club = (the word appears in a rainbow of colors) mmmMMRENHhhhh! (the other voices groan "Yay.")
      • Strong Bad's The King of Town fan fic in the Easter Egg.
        Strong Bad: (as The King of Town) "I can't believe I ate that whole pile of whatsit!" (normal voice) said the King of Town.
        The King of Town: (stuff coming out of his mouth) I wish that were fiction...
  • pet show:
    • When the e-mailer states that she is from Queensland (which is abbreviated as QLD), Strong Bad assumes that she is telling him "Quick, Look Down", and he discovers Homestar Runner trying to put relish on his feet, to which he responds by kicking him.
      Strong Bad: Thanks for the warning, Sarah. Homestar's always trying to give me the ol' relish-foot.
    • During the pet show, Pom Pom puts Trivia Time in the competition (even though he's a cookie jar), The King Of Town puts in a low-fat cooking device (when he is disqualified, he tells it that it will never amount to anything and that it isn't even his real father), Marzipan uses Homestar Runner (and actually manages to win the competition), and Strong Bad is disqualified for "flagrant use of relish-foot.
    • After Homestar Runner tells Strong Bad that he got a taste of his own medicine among other things and doesn't shut up about it, The Cheat smacks him in the face with the head from a Mattel Starbird.
    • In an Easter egg, there are several alternate takes of Strong Bad trying to figure out what the abbreviation "QLD" means:
      Strong Bad: (reading) "Have fun, Sarah. Quarter leg, dark." Are you trying to order fried chicken?
      Strong Bad: "Sarah. Quiet loser dork." Well, it's very big of you to admit that.
      Strong Bad: "Quivering live dwarves!" Uh... That's my new album name.
      Strong Bad: "Quit lumbering down." Hey, I'm not lumbering down!
      Strong Bad: "Quickly losing dignity." Yes. Yes, you are.
  • licensed:
    • Strong Bad argues that crappy knock-off products are the best sign of being famous, since anyone can license their likeness legitimately. In fact, he even has an application process for becoming an officially licensed unlicensed seller of Strong Bad and The Cheat knockoffs.
      Strong Bad: As for being famous and licensing stuff, you've got it all wrong. You don't need to be famous to license stuff. Just look at Biscuitdoughhandsman. He licensed his likeness to a paper towel company years ago, and no one knows who the crap he is!
      Lady: Get this, Vera, it's exorbitantly absorbant.
      Strong Bad: Shut up, lady!
    • Among the knockoff products Strong Bad endorses are direct-to-DVD mockbusters with ridiculous titles like "The Secret Princess and Her Oppressive Authority Figure 4" and "Jungle Animals in Decidedly Non-Jungle Situations," the latter of which being branded as "so straight to DVD it hurts."
    • When confronted by Strong Bad and The Cheat, Bubs tries to hide the fact that he's selling unlicensed unlicensed Strong Bad merchandise.
    Strong Bad: What's up with that trench coat, Bubs?
    Bubs: Oh, uh... I'm a public flasher!
    Strong Bad: Yeah, right. you ain't got no nudity under there! Open 'er up!
  • In shapeshifter, Strong Bad imagines he can shapeshift into almost anyone in the world, and in the following Imagine Spot, he turns into the King of Town's right half and Bubs's lower half.
    Oh, I get it. I can turn into almost anyone.
    • Near the end, during the part where Strong Bad transforms into Bubs' lower half, Coach Z walks up to the concession stand. Strong Bad decides he can still make this work, so he gets on the counter, feet up. Coach Z falls for it, and tries to buy a Lamborghini hot tub. He pays with a moist Benjamin, implied to be Strong Bad from an earlier segment. Then, a balloon tiger, also implied to be Strong Bad, floats by.
  • The Teen Girl Squad sequence from "love poems": "SHAKESPEARED!"
  • To show they still have their edge, Strong Bad relates the time that he and The Cheat "feathered" Strong Sad.
    Strong Bad: You said it, The Cheat! Tar is prohibitively expensive!
  • Strong Bad's take on independent movies (and how they compare to "indie" movies).
    Strong Bad: The title of the [indie] movie is either two of the cleverly-named main characters, or the city and state in which it takes place. Ooh, in fact, just call it City (Comma) State!
    • Strong Sad's film stars a washed up television actor who hasn't worked in ten years and is desperate.
      Homestar Runner: (annoyed) HEY! What are you looking at ME for?!
    • "[Strong Sad] makes his own soundtrack by weeping softly into the wrong end of a saxophone."
  • Jimmy's "Lacrosse Tourment" in "videography"
    Strong Bad: His dad was totally there and not at Applebee's! Good shot, John... Jimmy!
  • From volume 1 of the Strong Bad Email DVDs, the bonus e-mail "Videro Games" has this gem:
    Strong Bad: And who could forget "melee?" Which I can only assume means, "a buncha peoples fighting, like, all at the same time."
  • Speaking of bonus e-mails...the 4th volume of the Strong Bad Email DVDs features another unreleased e-mail, "Family Resemblence [sic]", in which Strong Bad is asked about what Pom Pom's family looks like. Strong Bad thinks that Pom Pom's family bears the same resemblance that SB's family does to him, and then theorizes what his family looks like. It all Makes Just as Much Sense in Context:
    • Since Pom Pom has an orange head, his brother, whom Strong Bad believes is named Stom Stom, has the head of a bulldog, the body of a horse's leg (with a single leg, yet), and boxing gloves for hands "just like all normal people do."
    • Since Pom Pom floats a little whenever he moves around, his younger sister, whom Strong Bad believes is named Stella Do, has a floaty face inside a pair of headphones with arms and legs.
    • Since Pom Pom makes bubbling sounds, Strong Bad believes his parents are a file cabinet.
    • At the end, Strong Bad starts swooning over Stella Do, but then stops himself when he realizes that she is simply hypothetical and complains about all the best girls being hypothetical these days:
      "Lemme tell ya, the hypothetical make-out sessions? Not. Gonna. Cut it."
      • In an Easter egg, Strong Bad is seen talking to Stella Do, inviting her over to his house so he can plug her into his record player, when along comes Pom Pom, who bubbles angrily at him for getting close to her. Startled, Strong Bad insists that "it's strictly hypothetical between [them]."
  • Yet another bonus email example: the 5th volume of the DVDs features yet another unreleased e-mail, "Accent", which features Strong Bad's attempts to regain his thick accent from his earlier years, trained by Coach Z. The training montage itself is the stuff of legends.
    Coach Z: First we gotta figure out what makes your accent unique... and then exorggerate the behoozits out of it!
    Strong Bad: My accent has behoozits?
    • Moments later...
      Coach Z (from offscreen): Okay, go!
      Strong Bad: Competition.
      (Strong Mad punches Strong Bad from off-screen. It's revealed that he's hanging upside down from a tree.)
      Coach Z: You'd better try that again, or I'm-a have him start workin' the kidneys.
      Strong Bad: (Desperately, in his old accent) COM-PA-TEE-SHUN! COM-PA-TEE-SHUN!
    • At one point, as part of the process, Strong Bad has to rub sandpaper on his neck:
      Strong Bad: (feeling pained) Coach Z, are you sure rubbing sandpaper on my throat is really necessary?
      Coach Z: Oh, absoprutely! 'Course, you won't be able to eat salid foods for a few months, but at least no one will bug yous about your accernt.
      (Strong Bad removes the sandpaper, revealing his neck a throbbing red)
      Strong Bad: (in his old accent) A-good!
  • In Imaginary, Strong Bad starts listing off the other characters' old imaginary friends until he get's to Coach Z's, which is "Real Live Actual Mr. Blangcaster Next Door."
  • The 2015 April Fools SBemail:
    • Strong Bad checking his email on various kitchen appliances, including the digital clock on his microwave, a blender, and a toaster (the toaster makes the message "Dear Strong Bad" by toasting part of the bread slightly darker).
      Strong Bad: *getting crushed ice from his fridge's ice dispenser* Dear crushed ice...
    • Strong Bad placing a mirror with a mustache drawn on it in front of Homestar, and successfully tricking him into believing the reflection is actually his long lost brother. Homestar rushes in for a hug and gets covered in bloody shards of broken mirror.
    • Marzipan is pranked with a fake "Gluten Free Concert for Birds", which involves her somehow being tricked into swallowing The Cheat.
  • In June of 2015, the Brothers Chaps did a cartoon for a fundraising event for the improv comedy group Dad's Garage & Friends... in the form of a Strong Bad Email mocking improv.
    Strong Bad: This just in... apparently improvisational comedy is not the money-making juggernaut it was in the mid-to-late 1994's. Wait, I'm getting an update... it never was.
  • The fake 100th email, where a 404 error ("The page cannot be displayed") page is shown and Strong Bad comes out to admonish the audience for trying to find something they weren't supposed to see yet. Homestar comes in, wanting to know where the 100th email is, but Strong Bad tells him to "just keep [his] pants on".
    Homestar: Pants? Hmm...
    Strong Bad: Yeah, chew on that one for a while. (walks off) Teach you to poke around in my HTML...
    • Then the short video ends with a funny text message: "Keep your pants on. For real."
    • For added bonus, the fake 404 page was 404 frames long.
  • Fast forward 100 emails later, and something similar happens: a fake 200th email, where a Mozilla Firefox "Address Not Found" page is shown and Strong Sad, wearing his Deleteheads cap, appears to berate the audience for cutting in front of the Deleteheads, who have been camping out for the 200th email for weeks, and orders them to the back of the line.
    Strong Sad: But there's really no one else here yet, so... you can get right behind us. We're gonna play "Name That Inconsistency" later on, if you want to join us. (suddenly angry) Don't even think about eating any of our Sun Chips! I packed those special!
    • The "Address Not Found" page itself:
    Address Not Found
    The browser could not find the host server for the provided address.
    * Did you make a mistake when typing the domain? Did you grandma?
    * Are you certain this domain name exists? Its registration may have expired.
    * Are you unable to browse other sites? Check your network connection, DNS
    server settings, and self before you riggidy-wreck yourself.
    * Is your computer protected by a firewall or proxy? Incorrect settings
    can interfere with Web browsing. Quit touching my stuff!
  • August of 2017 saw the release of the first Strong Bad Email in a while, about Strong Bad making a character video for Senor Cardgage:
    • "Let's not make a big deal out of this. It's just a little Strong Bad Email."
    • Among the things Cardgage is "too cool for" include "Wiping honey mustard off his goatee", "Knowing dead animals don't make good knee pads" ("Prude me in, Couch Z! I'm Reggie Toupee!"), and "being out of the way".
      Announcer: Now entering the game for Team Kneepads, number 34, Reggie Toupee!
    • Strong Bad was asked to film the video on Senor Cardgage's "camera"... an old key lime pie-scented air freshener.
    • Strong Bad had to track down a "beige-enough device" to play the copy of Senor Cardgage's video (in "a short lived format called Betaflop-D, apparently made for use only inside Tom Brokaw's house.") he mysteriously received in the mail. The "BROK4W Beigemost" is a huge boxy device not unlike the Roomy Vac from "Compy Catalog", and requires "four hundred different adapters" to plug into the TV of the Brothers Strong.
    • Everyone's horrified reactions to Senor Cardgage's video, which features a Gross-Up Close-Up of his "family might/could", a crudely-drawn smiley face scribbled onto his wrinkly, flabby torso.
      Strong Sad: What part of his person are we even looking at?!
      Strong Bad: Trust me, you guys! This is not what we shot that day... on an old air freshener.
      Homestar: This is so exciting! My first rated-R movie! Today, I am become a man! (takes out a can of cinnamon and sprinkles his face with it to make him look unshaven) Poof! Peff! Puff!
    • The "curse" that the video tape puts on everyone. It apparently causes their mouths to briefly become eerily realistic and speak in a creepy sing-song voice whenever they use the word "tertiary" in a sentence.
      Homestar Runner: (still wearing his cinnamon scruff) Well, Widow Jankroe, if we're talking about your children's future, primary and secondary investments simply won't be enough. We're gonna need to start talking about (his lips transform and he speaks in an echoey, sing-song, voice) tertiary (lips disappear, and he speaks normally) investments, and— (He suddenly realizes what just happened and freaks out) WAH! WAH! WAH!
      Strong Bad: (jumps in, scared) Let me guess, you just said, (the lips appear over his mouth and he shakes his hips) tertiary. (lips disappear and he, too, freaks out) WAAAAGH! It's the Cardgage curse! It finally caught up with us!
    • Homestar gives the short an MPAA-style rating.
      Homestar Runner: Rated F for Folds. May contain graphic images of vague skin folds, references to Family Might/Could's, and scenes of strong foldulence.
    • The YouTube-style Fake-Out Fade-Out featuring a rapping Couch Z and F-Sack.
  • The email "replacement" features Strong Bad asking characters what they do when Strong Sad is on the couch. First it's Bubs who initially does well by suggesting violence, until he decides to attack Strong Bad too. Then it's Strong Sad himself who offers to do nice things like make hummus and give a foot massage to himself. This is even funnier because Strong Bad addresses him immediately before asking in third person ("Strong Sad, Strong Sad's on the couch...") and Strong Sad plays along without objection, also in third person.
    • Earlier, Strong Bad quizzes Homestar on how he would make fun of people's names:
    Strong Bad: Gargleman.
    Homestar: Crapface.
    Strong Bad: Dumweiner.
    Homestar: Ummm... Crapface.
    Strong Bad: Butkus.
    Homestar: Crapface.
    Strong Bad: Crambert.
    Homestar: Crapface?
    Strong Bad: Desterhoft.
    Homestar: Let me think about it - Crapface.
    Strong Bad: Whoa! Perfect score!
  • The email "original" has Strong Bad mentioning some of the "guest Bubs" who took over after the departure of Original Bubs.
    Homestar approaches the Concession Stand with Senor Cardgage filling in the Bubs role
    Homestar: Hey there, Senator Cardgage Bubs. Lemme get a manila cheese coke!
    Senor Cardgage: Ohh... I should eat a pony.
    (Homestar looks shocked before the scene cuts to Strong Bad and The Cheat standing in front of a seemingly-empty Concession Stand)
    Crack Stuntman: (suddenly popping up behind the counter) BLAAAAAAAAAH! What can I get! For you fine gentlemen?!
    Strong Bad: Never mind, Crack Stunt-Bubs.
    Crack Stuntman: Ohh... I should eat a pony.
  • Strong-Bad's double-take shock at a writer using the phrase "Laser lemon" in "coloring". (He shortly calls on a halt to the project of an otherwise unexplained "laser lemon" because "Crayola beat us to the punch".)
  • The non-sbemail toon "Senor Mortgage" is a fake mortgage commercial that starts with a balding man sighing after being given a "not approved" stamp. The email "theme song" has a cut-off commercial that starts the same way... but with a voiceover asking "Do you wanna cut yer own arm off?", whereupon the balding man makes his exact same weak shrug and defeated sigh.

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