One Thousand Ways To Die / Tropes A to D

1000 Ways to Die tropes index
A to D (Ass Shove, Bait-and-Switch, Deadly Gas, Distracted by the Sexy, Drugs Are Bad) | E to K (Fan Disservice, High-Voltage Death, Hoist by His Own Petard, Karma Houdini) | L to S (Stuff Blowing Up) | T to Z (Tap on the Head, Too Dumb to Live)

#

• 419 Scam: A guy pulling off a variation called the "wash-wash" scam gets killed in "Scam I Am (Dead)" when he takes a door hook to the eye, courtesy of his pissed-off latest victim.

A

• Acceptable Breaks from Reality: Yes, some of the stories featured on the show are baloney, but they're still pretty damned funny.
• Acid Pool:
  • "Deep Fried": A man whose severe anger issues got him fired by his boss tries to get revenge for it by taking advantage of the man being next to a vat of hydrochloric acid. However, his ex-boss gets the upper hand and shoves him in self-defense.
  • "Vat's All Folks": A crooked cemetery owner named Demetrius slips into a vat of hydrofluoric acid when he tries to toss a dead body into it after his workers -- who were both ex-convicts -- refuse to do it. Even when the bastard managed to get out, it was too late as a lethal amount of the acid entered his body and burned him from the inside out.
• Act of True Love: "Ichiboned" has themes of this; a newlywed Japanese couple are deeply in love and want to "consummate" their relationship, but both of them are so repressed that they almost never have the chance. When they finally go for it, they end up going out together in simultaneous heart attacks due to both of their hearts being unused to orgasm. It says a lot that, in a show based around making fun of people who die in stupid ways, the narrator has nothing but respect for the couple and doesn't mock them at all, to the point of declaring their deaths to be the #1 ("Ichiban") on the 1000 Ways to Die list.
• Actually Pretty Funny: The fitness students in "Heim-licked" are unamused with their instructor taunting and harassing the newest student for being slightly fat, but laugh when he seemingly pretends to choke on her food. He's not pretending, but choking's not what tops him; it's when he jumps on an exercise ball in an attempt to dislodge the food and impales himself on a sprinkler.
• Agonizing Stomach Wound: Discussed. When a man is put on an unsecured gurney by negligent EMT workers, rolls down a hill, and is impaled on a sign, the doctor notes that stomach wounds actually kill quickly as there is a large artery parallel to the spine. This of course ignores the fact that the aforementioned artery might not get slashed if the wound is caused by something much smaller than the sign.
• Alcohol-Induced Idiocy: At least some of the deaths were due to drunkenness.
  • In "Boris Bititoff", a group of Russian soldiers gets drunk on vodka while patrolling through the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone. When one of the soldiers tries to have sexual intercourse with a rabid raccoon because his fellow soldiers struck him down, the raccoon bites his penis clean off. At which point he bled to death from his groin.
  • "Poi Vey" has a Jewish rabbi getting drunk at a luau in Hawaii after failing to hit on one of the hula girls, so he tries to dance the hula himself (in a drunken stupor) to win her heart, only to set himself on fire when he teeters towards a tiki torch, and burn to death, especially with his flammable high blood alcohol content.
  • In "Toilet Rolled", an alcoholic construction worker who is known for drinking on the job site gets flattened by his steamroller while in a port-a-potty because he forgot to set the parking brake on it.
  • "Just Plane Dead" has a former airline pilot who was fired for his alcoholism buzzing and strafing parkgoers with his RC Glider. He was reliving the glory days of his early flying career in the Air Force during Operation Desert Storm while taking hits of booze from his hip flask. When his plane flies into the sun, he loses sight of it in a drunken haze from the blinding light of the sun, until it's just about to impale him in the chest.
• Alcohol Is Gasoline: Inverted. A fugitive tries to get drunk by drinking the gasoline from his motorcycle after accidentally smashing his bottle of bourbon, only to throw up on his campfire and burn himself to death.
• All Cavemen Were Neanderthals: "Cave In" focuses on a Neanderthal who inadvertently discovers fire... only to subsequently discover, the hard way, that you can't breathe smoke. Naturally, the show gets the period wrong, crediting the story to "1,5000,000 BC" - current estimates have the oldest date for Neanderthal existence at roughly 130,000 years ago.
• All Men Are Perverts: The narrator briefly takes on this attitude during "Batter Upped" when the victim attempts to sexually assault his female coworker.
  "Guys, how many times do you have to learn this lesson? No means no!"
• All Women Are Lustful: Pretty much every woman under 50 who appears in the show (at least in S2) is seen having sex, or thinking about sex, or using her sex appeal to manipulate men into doing things, or at the very least being the subject of a Ms. Fanservice shot.
• Alpha Bitch:
  • "Gooed Riddance": Carly, one of the women who reunite at a slumber party ten years after bonding at a summer camp, has become a stuck-up, vain bitch. The others, who started to regret saving her from drowning back at the camp, challenge her to a match of "chubby bunny." Carly beats them all but the marshmallows melt in her mouth, sealing her throat and choking her to death.
  • "Mudder Sucked": Harriet stands out for not only being the leader of the Eta Pi sorority but also the daughter of a Marine drill instructor, physically and emotionally abusing the pledges in hazings. While one of the pledges stands up to Harriet in the sorority's mud-wrestling match, the poor girl ends up losing. However, Harriet's gloating and life are cut short when she sinks into the mud pit and dies because it was built on top of an underground sinkhole.
  • "Pam Caked!": Pamela, the spoiled captain of a cheer team, resents the new girl, Amber, for becoming the new flyer and causing the former's boyfriend to dump her for the latter. During the homecoming game, Pamela intentionally lets Amber fall out of spite and gloats without realizing she got in the team banner's way and ends up trampled by the football team, their cleats breaking her ribs and puncturing her heart in the stampede.
• Alternate Universe: The show does this by making up a what-if scenario of Charlie Sheen's death by making up their own spoof celebrity called "Harlie" getting killed by the "Hollywood Hitman" for being unstable.
• Amazonian Beauty: Lydia from "Wet and Dry".
• And There Was Much Rejoicing: Averted most of the time, as people are usually shocked to see someone die in front of them, even if they were rather unpleasant. There are exceptions, however.
  • "Bitch Zapped" has a shrewish woman nagging at her husband about mowing the lawn until she decides to do it. Eventually, she runs over her husband's arc welder cord, electrocuting herself. The man's response is saying "there is a God," and sipping some of his wife's martini.
  • "Boys 2 Dead" has a washed-up boy band performing for an unenthusiastic crowd at a bar. The narcissistic leader attempts to crowd surf only to break his neck on the ground when no one catches him. One Beat later, the band continues their act.
  • Also in "Down With The Clown" where after the children's clown dies from electrocution, the Insane Clown Posse members stare for a moment... and then continue their song (which, to fit even better with the trope, happened to be "In Yo Face").
• Angry Chef: "Chef Boy-R-Dead" features a bad-tempered, demanding head chef whose sous chef plans to plagiarize his recipes. Just to be clear, he's not the one who ends up dead, it's the sous chef.
• Anyone Can Die: While the show tends towards victims who get what they deserve, especially in later seasons, this trope is still in effect:
  • "Fright-mare": A woman dies in her sleep from cardiac arrest after having a nightmare about a demonic dwarf who strangles her.
  • "Nite-Capped": A man walking home from a New Years' party with his girlfriend gets hit by a stray bullet from another group who fired their guns in the air for their celebration.
  • "Belly'd Up": A belly dancer practicing for an upcoming competition accidentally hangs herself on a moving ceiling fan while practicing.
  • "Tanked Girl": A sexy scuba diver is sitting in a decompression chamber, and explodes after a night janitor accidentally opens it.
  • "Tanks For Nothing": A Buddhist yoga practitioner gets bitten by a Florida water moccasin.
  • "Radium Girls": The story of the 1920s female workers who were exposed to radioactive paint at their jobs. It ends with the surviving girls starting a movement to demand better security for workers after one of them dies.
  • "Sex Ray": A patient going for an X-ray gets a lethal dose of radiation poisoning while watching his doctor bang his assistant, whose backside was banging the "ON" button of the X-ray.
  • "Pissed Offed": An Irish golfer went to America to play, and got a fatal infection from a rat who climbed into his pants, scratching up his leg, then pissed on those scratches.
  • "Fin-ished": A fisherwoman who is incredibly bad at fishing finally catches a fish, but it flies into her mouth and gets lodged in her throat, suffocating her. To make matters worse, the fish's sharp scales tore her throat from the inside as she attempted to pull it out.
  • "Ichi-boned": A repressed Japanese couple who died in the midst of finally consummating their marriage.
  • "Poi Vey": An Orthodox Jew tried to woo a hula dancer, and burned to death after being rejected and getting drunk to dull his pain.
  • "Blend-Dead": A health nut dies from a brain aneurysm after drinking so many of her homemade smoothies made from her garden, unaware that her landlord contaminated her garden with rat poison.
  • A teenager is randomly hit by a small meteorite during a pool party without doing anything to deserve it.
  • A segment begins with a 100-year-old man getting in his car for a last ride and dying of a sudden heart attack. The "stupid death" instead belongs to a random gangbanger, who is run over by the dead man's car while standing on the road.
• Artistic License: The episode where the virgin at the brothel is literally grabbed and pulled into the dominatrix's dungeon. Obviously, she forgot to set a safeword (or, given he was gagged, a safe gesture), but sex workers, like any other workaday stiff, tend to have an aversion to soliciting extra work for themselves. In addition, sex workers know full well the boundaries around active & enthusiastic consent, as they rely on them too for protection in their jobs.
• Artistic License – Animal Care: The corrupt prison warden in "War-done" plans to share some cupcakes he "confiscated" (read: stole) from one of his inmates with his dog. In reality, this wouldn't be a good idea even if some of them hadn't been laced with PCP; cake isn't healthy for dogs and some kinds can be lethal to them.
• Artistic License – History:
  • An episode has a Spanish inquisitor inventing the torture device called "Wooden Horse" and being rewarded by his superiors by using it on him. However the Wooden Horse was never used by the Spanish Inquisition or in Spain (despite its alternate name "Spanish Donkey"). The story is rather a loose adaptation of Phalaris and the invention of the Brazen Bull, which might have been changed to adjust to the series's low budget.
  • Speaking of the Brazen Bull, "My Big Fat Greek Death" portrays Perillos as being immediately executed by his own invention. In reality, Phalaris only kept him inside the bull long enough to hear him scream as a means to test its acoustic system. Perillos was then removed from the bull and then thrown off a cliff.
  • Another is about a Nazi scientist reviving a snake and being bitten by it while "the Americans" take Berlin in the last days of World War II. The Soviets and Polish took Berlin, not Americans. And in lieu of sets standing for a bombed ruin of a city and onscreen armies, the fighting looks like a couple guys chasing each another in a dark storage area. The story might be inspired by a mix of Frankenstein, Josef Mengele, and Soviet scientist Alexander Bogdanov, who died after injecting himself with blood from a student suffering from malaria and tuberculosis.
  • "Ex-Squeezed" is set in 1581, and concerns the invention of "the Scavenger's Daughter", a torture device that squeezes the victim to death. The problem is that said invention is credited to Sir William Skevington. Sir William Skevington died circa 1535; the Scavenger's Daughter was invented by his son, Sir Leonard Skevington. Its first recorded use was also in 1580, one year before the show's date.
• Asshole Victim: Used rather deliberately. A vast majority of the victims in the stories are assholes, but it's most likely due to the showrunners changing the details of the real story so that the victims' deaths seem deserved. Seeing a bunch of gruesome/weird deaths of this nature would be depressing if the victims were just regular people.

B

• Baby Don't Got Back: One story has a woman hiring a doctor to make her butt bigger to attract more men using silicone injections. Said doctor, however, is a complete fraud, and instead of using actual silicone, injects bathroom caulk into her. She eventually dies because some of the caulk was injected directly into her bloodstream, causing massive blood clots to form, almost completely cutting off blood flow to her whole body.
• Back-Alley Doctor: "Caulk Blocked" has a woman go to a shady plastic surgeon to get her rear end enlarged. Unfortunately for her, the man uses caulk instead of silicone, some of which ends up injected directly into her bloodstream.
• Bad Humor Truck: The victim in "Rocky Roadkill" is a meth dealer who sells his product out of an ice cream truck to avoid police attention. While running from an attempted robbery, he takes a turn too fast and knocks over an ice chest, which floods the truck with chlorofluorocarbons. Unable to breathe, he passes out at the wheel and swerves into a tree, killing him instantly.
• Back from the Dead: A rare realistic example. In "Homie's Dead", a robber who seemingly beat to death one of the people in the house he had broken into gets a nasty surprise when the dead man suddenly revives due to the miraculous medical phenomenon of Lazarus Syndrome, in which blood circulation suddenly resumes minutes after stopping. The shock from this event caused the robber to fall over a balcony to his death below.
• Based on a Great Big Lie: Some of the deaths are based on real incidents, but in many of these cases, all identifying information has been changed for legal and ethical reasons. Other deaths, however, are probably urban legends.
• Bears Are Bad News:
  • "Em-Bear-Assed": A man tripping out on psychedelic mushrooms crashes a furry orgy, mistakes a real bear cub for a costumed human, and gets mauled by the Mama Bear.
  • "Tree Mugger": A loopy nature lover protesting against a tree being set up to be cut down watches in horror as a grizzly slashes him open while the man is chained to the tree
  • "A Trip to the Maul": Another bear mauling death; this time, it's a man who is camping out in the woods so he can cheat on his wife and went blind from vasocongestion (temporary or permanent sight loss from having sex).
• Beastly Bloodsports: A Mexican man who bets on a rooster in a cockfight attaches razors to its claws to ensure its winning, and ends up getting his throat slashed by them.
• Becoming the Mask: Barnaby (the infantilist who got his neck broken from the oversized drop-gate crib he built) in "Crib Your Enthusiasm." He played the part too well.
• Bestiality Is Depraved:
  • "Boris Bititoff": A drunken Russian soldier attempts to have sex with a raccoon after he fails to score with a female soldier. It bites his penis off and he bleeds to death.
  • "Em-Bear-Assed": A man tripping out on psychedelic mushrooms crashes a furry orgy, starts screwing a bear cub thinking it's one of the costumed furries, and gets fatally mauled by the cub's mother.
• Big Beautiful Woman: "Big Boned" features a contest of these, but unfortunately, a drunken heckler enters and makes fun of the contestants. He ends up dying when all three of the contestants step on one end of the runway to confront him and fall on him after it broke.
• Bigger Is Better in Bed: In "Wedding Crasher", a man attempts to prove he's a better match for his ex-girlfriend than the man she's marrying by showing off his massive manhood.
• Big Red Button: The victim of "Sex Ray" dies because the backside of one of the two technicians who were making out kept hitting the 'ON' Button for the X-Ray.
• Bilingual Bonus:
  • "Asphyxi-Asian": the Japanese text in the banner behind the host and contestants reads, "Crazy Game Show Adventure" (クレイジーなゲーム番組の冒険, Kureijīna Gēmu Bangumi no Bouken)
  • "Golden Die-angle": The "coi churng" [sic] sign in front of the opium farm compound on which Ting displays the severed heads of his victims means "beware" in Vietnamese, which is fitting since he does this to warn thieves.
• Bird-Poop Gag: In "S***-Dead", a man named Larry shoos off a sparrow hawk sitting on his lawn. After successfully ridding himself of it, the hawk drops a load on Larry's face, right in his mouth. He dies of Salmonellosis afterward.
• Bittersweet Ending: "Ichiboned": a Japanese couple, married for seven years, have never had sex as they are too repressed. One night, the husband brings home a bottle of plum wine, split it, and finally make love...only to die from simultaneous heart attacks, as their bodies weren't used to the effects of an orgasm (especially one that comes from years of repressing all sexual urges and desires). Even the narrator admits it's a better way to go than most of the alternatives, and it's rated the #1 death in the show.
  • "Premature Endings," at the other end of the list (#1000), also qualify. After walking through an emergency room full of people who have suffered bizarre (and presumably fatal) injuries due to their own stupidity, a woman goes to her elderly father's hospital room to visit him one last time before he dies peacefully of natural causes. The narrator comments that the show is like an instruction manual: you can do something dumb and end up as one of its stories, or you can live a sensible life and just watch it. One can argue that this one goes all the way to Earn Your Happy Ending: all humans eventually die, but the man who died in this one had lived a decent life, was loved by his family and friends, and avoided drunken stupidity, the business end of karma's sword, and all the other pitfalls common to this show's cases. For that, he got to die a peaceful death with his beloved daughter at his side instead of being, say, caught in an explosion or mauled by wild animals or torn a new asshole. And for a mortal race, can there be a happier ending than a natural death surrounded by loved ones?
  • "Radium Girls" had many 1920s female watch workers die of radiation poisoning after their employer essentially required them to ingest the radium paint they used (they were painting glow-in-the-dark radium compounds onto watch hands and faces, a task which requires very fine-pointed brushes, and were advised by management to re-point the bristles with their lips when necessary). This resulted in the "Radium Girls" lawsuit, which produced safer working conditions in watch-painting factories, but didn't do much to help those who had already succumbed to cancers of the face and jaw.
• Black Comedy: Quite a few of the deaths in the series are amusing in a dark and twisted way. Also, the series narrator displays a rather wry sense of humor.
• Bland-Name Product: Funny Eddie's target, "Infernal Clown Posse". Oddly enough, they're played by the real Insane Clown Posse, a strange case of a group's name being changed for legal reasons and yet the real deal showing up anyway. Even stranger is that the clip is actually labeled "Insane Clown Posse" on the website. The Faygo they throw around is likewise only called "soda pop".
  • There's also "Go(u)ld's Gym" in one episode.
  • "Pained Gun" averts this by blatantly namedropping YouTube.
  • "Rife-Ill" also tries to avert this, by stating that the Taliban assassin's preferred firearm is a McMillan Tac-50, but the actual weapon shown is not one (rather, it's the more famous Barrett M82).
• Blazing Inferno Hellfire Sauce: ... though not a sauce: in "Chili Today, Dead Tomorrow", a dumb tourist tries to stomach a ghost pepper at a Native American Trading Post, but couldn't handle the heat. He accidentally then gulps down a whole jar of rattlesnake venom after mistaking it for water. He soon died from the venom.
• Blonde Republican Sex Kitten: The drunken bachelorette who broke her neck after a pigeon flew in her mouth. Said to normally be an abstemious Tea Party supporter (who planned on getting wasted on champagne and only champagne), but someone gave her absinthe and she went nuts. Also fake, as absinthe was proven harmless (well, besides for the high alcohol content) after the turn of the millennia.
• Blood from Every Orifice: In "Ex-Squeezed". The narrator even points this out.
• Bloodier and Gorier: The deaths became more graphic in the show's later years.
  • "Deep Fried" and "Vat's All Folks" both involved the victim falling in acid (in the former, it was an angry metal worker who was fired for his Hair-Trigger Temper; in the latter, it was a crooked cemetery boss who tried to get rid of a corpse so he can make money by reusing empty burial plots). The latter episode is clearly more graphic than the former because we see the victim half-melted in the live-action segment.
• Blown Across the Room: In "Harmored Car", this happens to a novice robber who is shot by the police while robbing an armored car. He doesn't go flying through the air, but he still ends up stumbling backwards into the doors of the car. He survives thanks to his bulletproof vest, but his partner, who was sticking his head out through the doors, gets his neck crushed and dies.
• Boastful Rap: One Chinese sweatshop owner brags about mistreating his employees with a rap. Needless to say, they end up killing him.
• Body Horror: Most of the deaths qualify (particularly ones where people are sliced up into a bloody mess, suffer the effects of a horrific disease, die from radioactive exposure, get melted by acid, get set on fire, or have half their brains blown out or cut off in some horrific manner).
• Body Sushi: A lech at his bachelor party tries to rape a stripper who was used as a human sushi bar. He died when the toilet's flush mechanism blew up and shot jagged porcelain into his rectum.
• Book Ends: "Ichiboned" and "Premature Endings", of which are numbers 1 and 1000 respectively.
• Boom, Headshot!: It's not uncommon that victims die by getting shot in the head, although by accident.
  • "Fiddle Licked": Abdullah Muhammad Yassin, a dangerous terrorist wanted in the Middle East and Europe, sneaks into the US posing as a rug salesman named Steven, taking a woman named Miranda on a date to a fancy restaurant to keep appearances. However, a CIA agent named Anna is tasked to assassinate him and poses as a violinist to this effect, equipped with a plasma laser rifle hidden inside her violin case. When the concert ended, Anna pulled the trigger from inside the case, shooting Abdullah's head with a gamma-ray blast that melted his brain.
  • "Any Given Gunday": Cindy, a jersey chaser (person who dates or goes out with professional sports team athletes), seduces a pro footballer named Jerome in the hopes of getting his money. However, Jerome wakes up with no recollection of the deed after suffering a concussion from one of his games and thinks someone broke into his house. When he finds Cindy cooking breakfast for him and about to open the oven, he futilely warns her not to because he hid a gun in there, causing it to go off from the oven's heat and shooting the groupie in the head, killing her instantly.
  • "Ji-Had It Coming": A former award-winning journalist who denounced her American heritage, converted to Islam, and married a Taliban leader participates in her own wedding's celebratory fire, only to lose control of the gun and resulting in a stray bullet hitting a metal pitcher, ricocheting into her skull and bouncing inside, causing the traitorous bride to die from immediately fatal wounds and massive internal bleeding.
  • "Written Offed": A Jerkass banker who attempted to foreclose an Armenian immigrant's Army-Navy store accidentally shoots himself in the head while checking the pen gun he planned to sign the contract with. The bullet enters the skull and bounces inside, killing the bastard.
  • "Dead-dy Dearest": An abusive father shoots his daughter's boyfriend after catching them together on her bed, but then the bastard laughs and reveals he used blank rounds. To demonstrate it, he makes the mistake of putting the gun to his head and pulling the trigger, which causes the air column to crack his skull and send fragments to his brain, killing him.
  • "Booby-Zapped": A Conspiracy Theorist who took medication to ease his paranoia-induced insomnia is unaware that it also caused somnambulism. While he dodges all of his own traps in his sleepwalking and manages to get his chicken leftovers from the fridge, he's done in by a laser-operated shotgun nailing him in the head before he can eat them.
  • "Master E-raced": A Nazi soldier gets shot in the head by American troops in the last days of WWII. However, he miraculously survived and emigrated to the US in secrecy thanks to ODESSA, a Nazi relocation network to which he retains loyalty until old age. While he argued with his wife over not having enough milk for his breakfast and going to the fridge to get it himself, he hit his head on the frame, causing the bullet to dislodge and perforate a blood vessel in his brain, finally putting an end to the former soldier's life.
  • "Bush Whacked 2: South of the Border": Two drug haulers on the run from their boss for stealing $8 million worth of drugs from him find a nearby bush and hide in it until he passed them by. However, it turns out the bush was a firestick plant, whose sap caused them burning pain in their eyes and skin, eventually forcing both thieves out in the open, where their boss spots them and his bodyguard shoots each of them in the head.
• Boom in the Hand: In "Straight to DVDead", the victim (an egocentric bastard who tried to kill the other guy playing the protagonist of a low-budget movie set in 1775 so he can get that role instead, on whom the Narrator tells the viewers had previous criminal records) gets his hand blown up mid-recording due to overloading gunpowder into his prop gun before putting a real lead bullet in it, in an attempt to Make It Look Like an Accident. However, he died faster than expected when a piece of gun shrapnel got lodged in his right thigh, cutting the femoral artery and causing him to die from blood loss.
• Bottomless Magazines: The AK-47 in "Ji-Had It Coming", which the victim (a former American journalist who renounced her U.S. citizenship, converted to Islam, and married a Taliban leader in Afghanistan) fires for at least six seconds before one of the bullets ricochets into her head; an actual AK's rate of fire would empty a regular 30-round mag in three seconds tops.
• Bound and Gagged: In "Chucked Up" (the story of the housewife who puts on a kinky web show for her husband by tying herself up, only to have a burglar come in, rob her blind, and sicken her to death with his bad breath).
• Boyfriend-Blocking Dad:
  • In "Dead-y Dearest", a war-vet father takes to scaring off his daughter's suitor with a gun loaded with blanks. When he tried to drive home the point that there were no real bullets by setting the gun to his head and pulling the trigger, the hot air from the blank blew through his brain.
  • In "Tenta-killed" there's a traditionalist Korean father who chokes to death on a live octopus while "testing" his daughter's Korean-American boyfriend's "worth".
• Breast Attack: "Tipping Point" features a self-inflicted, accidental example. When a team of football players enters Pink Peaks, a Hooters-style bar, two waitresses named Kerry and Sherry fight over who gets to serve them much to the players' excitement. When Kerry seemed to gain the upper hand and jumped at Sherry for the kill, the latter dodged out of the way for the former to fall on the receipt holder, with the pointy tip in her left breast. Kerry desperately dislodges it and ends up spilling silicone and blood from her heart, causing her to die of exsanguination.
• Breast Expansion: Of the Squick variety as opposed to being used for sexy purposes. One episode covers the famous urban legend "woman with cheap breast implants has her implants explode during an airplane flight." The reenactment scenes depict the woman's breasts growing to absurd proportions within a short amount of time due to the implants themselves expanding because of a change in cabin pressure, and it ends with the woman dying in a bloody mess. The validity of this particular story has been brought into question, though, since the story itself is commonly classified as an urban legend by places like Snopes, and MythBusters would eventually go on to debunk this popular myth not too long afterward.
• Brown Note: An iDoser (a drug dealer {of sorts} who uses special mp3s that can create hallucinogenic effects when listened to) creates a low-frequency sound called "Satan's Jackhammer," which first makes him wet and soil his pants, then makes his cells pop and his organs suffer catastrophic failure.
  • A Jewish-American female breakdancer suffers a heart attack when her heartbeat is knocked out of sync by her extremely loud speakers.
• Bury Your Gays: "Lesbosuction", "Lesboned", "Deadliest Munch" and "Die-Brator" all feature lesbians getting killed in various fashions. Surprisingly, the only gay male that dies in this show is the man in "Brain Worms".
• Buzzing the Deck: A former fighter pilot turned airline pilot who had been let go from his job for his alcoholism was buzzing people along a seawalk with his RC glider. He lost sight of it when it flew towards the sun, and the glider ends up impaling him through the chest.

C

• Cactus Cushion: In the "Succu-Offed" segment, two stoners stole a Saguaro cactus and celebrate with peyote in the desert, but get a shared hallucination where the Saguaro tells them they will be punished for their crime. As they run for their lives, one stoner falls on an agave plant (a succulent or thick-stemmed plant unrelated to cacti, but just as deadly) and is Impaled with Extreme Prejudice, while the other stoner runs into another Saguaro cactus and gets speared in the eye.
• The Cameo: The junkie who appears for a second in "Rocky Roadkill" was played by voice actor Robert Axelrod.
• Can't Hold His Liquor: An Amish youth on rumspringa went to a Halloween party, and tried alcohol for the first time. He died because his body lacked an enzyme to digest it and got poisoned.
• Chained to a Bed: Happened to a cross-dressing cokehead in the 1980s who ended up drowning when his stiletto heels punctured the waterbed mattress on which he was chained.
• Cheater Gets Cheated On: "Kill Bill and Billie" is about a married couple who both suspect that their partner is cheating on the other. Both of them are correct in their assumption, as the man is seeing prostitutes, and the wife is a prostitute. They discover each other's infidelity when the prostitute that the husband hires turns out to be his own wife. Both of them are then shot dead by a hitman the man had sent to kill his wife.
• Cheaters Never Prosper: Some of the victims died from trying to cheat at various games.
  • "Asphyxi-asian": A bitchy Japanese game show contestant screws her rival over while scuba diving in a pool to carry cantaloupes through rings by forcing her to drop hers and yank her breathing valve, forcing her to surface. However, the cheater ends up dying because her scuba tank was filled with a truck's exhaust before the show's recording, causing her to asphyxiate from carbon monoxide poisoning.
  • "Chain On You": An amateur motocross racer, vindictive after having lost to her rival, tries to sabotage her by sticking a bolt into her bike's chain. It works all too well: the chain snaps off, only to hit the cheater in the neck and slice her throat.
  • "Cock-A-Doodle Die": A man enters a cockfight and cheats by putting razor blades on his chicken. After winning his opponent discovers he had cheated. As he tries to escape, he falls and his rooster uses its razor blade to slice his throat.
  • "Texas Fold 'Em" A junkyard owner beats a group of heavies in a game of Texas Hold 'Em every time. Of course, one of the members realizes that he has been cheating all along and they chase him out to the junkyard. The cheater hides in a wrecked minivan and narrowly escapes the heavies. Unfortunately for him, karma bites him in the ass when the claw of a crane grabs the minivan and pins the door against him so he can't move. The minivan is then placed onto a crusher, which crushes the minivan with the cheater inside.
  • The victim in "Ass-Plosion" eliminates one of his rivals in a bodybuilding competition by greasing up the bars on a weight. He gets one of the more brutal deaths in the series: his intestines bloodily fall out of his ass as he's trying to lift a large rock, causing a massive and fatal heart attack.
• Cheek Copy: Deconstructed in "Electro-cutie." A drunk intern at an office party decides to photocopy her butt for her boss during a Christmas party as a gift to him. The glass breaks out from under her and the machine electrocutes her to death.
• Chekhov's Gun: In "Slayer Cake", a bakery owner fires an incompetent employee, who throws a serving tray on the floor in anger and decides to deface several cakes with vulgarities written in icing in revenge. The ex-employee then slips on the tray, falls down and stabs himself in the heart with the icing syringe.
• Chimney Entry: One of the Asshole Victims profiled is a Psycho Ex-Girlfriend that kept stalking her ex-boyfriend and his new lover, and that tried to get into the man's house via the chimney while they were away on vacation in order to live in and (probably) eventually catch them when they returned. Unfortunately, she got stuck in said chimney and died of dehydration... and the corpse was found by the lovebirds when they came back home and turned on the chimney, setting the corpse on fire.
• Clip Show: The Deathies (an award show celebrating the series' most gruesome death).
• Cloudcuckoolander: Eccentric people are quite prone in this show, but their deaths are mostly combined with stupidity.
  • The hippie woman who tried to revive a raccoon. Sure, performing respiration on a road-killed wild animal is not a good idea, but she could at least hauled it to the edge of the road first.
  • The health nut who unknowingly drank contaminated health juice courtesy of her landowner in "Blend-Dead". This happened over a few weeks. It didn't occur to her that her "immortality cocktail" didn't work and she had plenty of time to call the doctor.
  • "Rubbed Out" had a germophobe filling a bathtub with rubbing alcohol and bathing in it after being vomited on by a homeless person. Let's just say that ingestion isn't the only way to take in alcohol.
• Compensating for Something: The victim from "Kill Basa" was a partygoer with a complex about his size who went to the restroom to tie a 12-inch kielbasa to his thigh with surgical tubing. While he revels in the attention of women going after his "rod," it becomes his undoing as the tubing creates a tourniquet, which generates a clot that swims up to his lungs and kills him with a massive pulmonary embolism.
• Conspiracy Theorist:
  • "Booby-zapped": Warren was so paranoid he developed paralysis and insomnia and even rigged his house with booby traps for anyone who might try to get him. However, his sleep medication gave him somnambulism as a side effect. While Warren evades most of his own traps in search of a snack, he ends up shot in the head by a laser-operated shotgun when about to eat his chicken leftovers.
  • "Dead Kacynski": Dalen was an anarchistic, nihilistic, misanthropic bastard living off the grid in a shack powered by a stockpile of car batteries. He believed the government was out to get him and thus he planned to bomb a Federal Court building. When his girlfriend, Elaine, questions him while preparing his Molotov cocktails, Dalen flips out and kicks her out. He meets his demise when he connects an old mimeograph to write his manifesto, which causes the car batteries to blow up, showering the bastard in sulphuric acid, breaking his bones from the impact, and sending shrapnel into his face.
• Cooked to Death: "Batter Upped" has a sleazy carnival concession stand owner accidentally fall headfirst into his own deep fryer as a result of being dazed by running into a pole while chasing after a woman he had attempted to sexually assault. By the time someone finds him, he's already dead.
• Cop Hater: The victim in "Tread Marked" is a redneck who hates any checks on his ability to do whatever he wants, including the police. When a cop pulls him over for drunk driving, he steals his gun and nearly shoots him before a tire accidentally dropped by a junker bounces down the road and hits him with fatal consequences.
• Cranial Plate Ability: Inverted. One death involves a drug addict who gets killed when an MRI is activated with the intent to disarm him, but a metal plate in his head causes him to get sucked into the machine and slam headfirst into the magnet inside.
• Crazy Cat Lady: The victim in "Cat Got Your Life" is a middle-aged divorcee who hoards cats. She starts milking the cats and drinking their milk...and dies because they had been eating white snakeroot, a plant toxic to humans.
• Crippling Castration: In "Doggie Styled", the dog (whose inner dialogue is voiced by the Narrator) commented that he liked to lick his own testicles, but that whoever invented neutering should have theirs cut off.
• Cruel and Unusual Death: The show's premise, particularly when dealing with deaths from bizarre medical conditions, like the Amish boy who went out drinking and died because he was born without an enzyme that processed alcohol, the pot farmer who smoked his own stash and ate a grasshopper (which triggered an allergic reaction he never knew he had), or any time someone drops dead from an allergic reaction that the victim never knew he had (the 32-year-old virgin whose first time having sex ended with him suffocating from a latex allergy to his gimp suit and the park flasher who died after ingesting peanut-laced breast milk from a group of badass moms who beat the crap out of him for being a creep).
• Currency Cuisine: One story involves a Frenchman suffering from a condition that gives him an addiction to eating inedible objects, with his favorite being coins. When he can no longer obtain anymore, he starts eating things like thumbtacks and nails, eventually dying from his stomach being cut open by all of it.
• Cyanide Pill: "Spyanide" features an American citizen spying on his country for Nazi Germany. When another man starts running after him, he thinks his cover's been blown and swallows a cyanide pill. But in reality, the man just noticed he'd forgotten his notebook and wanted to return it to him.

D

• Dangerous Deserter: "WW1 And Done" is about a deserter from the German army who loots battlefields on the sly during lulls in the fighting and murders anyone on either side he comes across. He meets his end when he picks up a British booby trap thinking it's a food container, causing it to explode in his face.
• Dangerously Loaded Cargo: One story features a pair of rogue African militiamen who steal and hoard supplies from relief containers meant for refugees dropped from planes. Both of them end up getting crushed to death by one of said containers after its chute fails to open and they're too drunk to notice it falling right on top of their heads.
• The Darkness Before Death: One of the depicted deaths has a pair of would-be Prohibition-era bootleggers unwittingly drink pure methanol, which metabolizes into formic acid in their bloodstreams and leads to death by organ failure. For one of the bootleggers, his eyes are the first organs to shut down, caused by the buildup of formic acid in his retinas.
• Dead Foot Leadfoot: "ReTired" has an old man die while sitting behind the wheel of his old Chrysler. Shortly afterward, the parking brake gives out and the car rolls down the hill, running over a robber fleeing the scene of one of his crimes.
• Deadline News: "This Just In...My Chest" has a news reporter get impaled in the chest by a mailbox while covering a hurricane. This was possibly inspired by Anderson Cooper's infamous near fatal incident during Hurricane Dennis.
• Deadpan Snarker: A dog, oddly enough, in "Doggie Styled," and both announcers (Ron Perlman and his replacement, Joe Irwin).
• Deadly Dodging: In "Cat Fight On A Hot Tin Hood", two women named Amy and Brenda get into a fight over a parking space. When Amy sidestep's Brenda's attack, Brenda stumbles into a parked car and is impaled by the hood ornament.
• Deadly Prank:
  • "Smoked": Two guys spend all day smoking cigarettes; one of them is sick of his friend mooching cigarettes off him, so he loads them into a shotgun shell to fire them in his mouth, thinking he'd just choke on them. He learns the hard way it's not the bullets that kill; it's the velocity they're shot out at.
  • "Somewhere Over The Railing": Two women named Margo and Diana pranked each other for Internet views, but the latter got sick of the former's pranks and planned to take revenge by stuffing a live airbag into a chair with the back facing the railing. When she tries to get Margo into the chair, Diana is the one who ends up sitting on it by accident and gets thrown over the railing by the airbag; the fall breaks her spinal cord and kills her instantly.
• Dead Man Honking: In the first "Handi-crapped" story, the victim slouches against his car's steering wheel after his neck is broken by the loose surfboard, causing the horn to go off continuously.
• Death by Falling Over: Carmen, the victim in "Pimp My Death," was an escort who tricked a married man named Mike into picking her up and charged him $2000 the night, which he refuses. Even when Carmen calls Big Hank over to intimidate him into paying, he refuses and in their scuffle, Hank shoves Mike into Carmen in the middle of taking the money out of his wallet, causing her to hit her head into the marble sink with such force she died right as she went unconscious.
• Death by Gluttony:
  • "Doggie Style": A shoplifter attempts to eat a whole hot dog while running from the shopkeeper. He chokes to death on it.
  • "Gorgeous Gorge": A bulimic supermodel's stomach ruptures during her ritual of binging and purging in a hotel room.
  • Also a contributing factor to the death of the belching man in "Gut Busted," whose years of bad eating have left his stomach full of ulcers (which were exacerbated when his girlfriend tried to fix his belching problem by punching him in the stomach).
  • "Death of Sum Young Guy": A glutton eats at so many all-you-can-eat Chinese buffets and nearly chokes. Thankfully, somebody saved him with the Heimlich maneuver. However, shortly after, he dies of a massive heart attack caused by the high content of MSG built up in his body. Although this is very much a case of Artistic License – Medicine considering that the oft-claimed health effects of MSG have absolutely zero scientific backings whatsoever.
  • "Tenta-Killed": An old-fashioned Korean father, in an attempt to dissuade a Korean-American boy from dating his daughter (as the father thinks that the boy is too brainwashed by Western excess to actually know his roots), swallows a live octopus whole. The octopus's suction cups latch onto his throat, suffocating him.
  • "Scarf-Faced": A terrorist starved himself to escape his prison cell. When he meets up with his terrorist cell, he gorges himself on food, which turns out to not be a good idea after starving yourself for so long (The technical term is "refeeding syndrome").
• Death by a Thousand Cuts:
  • "Cham-Pained": A crooked art auctioneer tried to open the bottle of champagne for a champagne fountain, but accidentally popped the cork right on her eye, causing her to fall on the stack of wine glasses, which caused her to bleed profusely until she lost consciousness and died.
  • "Skyscraped": A Jerkass banker smugly looked through a large window after ruining people for the day, but a freak gust of wind shatters the window, impaling her with hundreds of sharp glass.
  • "Wedding Crasher": A drunk man who stripped naked at his ex-girlfriend's wedding out of spite for marrying a rich old man instead of him tries to escape when he was about to be forcibly booted out of the wedding, but mistook a clear glass window for an open entrance. You can guess what happens next.
• Definitely Just a Cold: In "U.P.F'D.", an postal worker-turned-mail thief opens a package full of anthrax spores that was intended for a local judge. He ignores the symptoms until he finally collapses and dies while in the middle of stealing another package a week later.
• Delayed Reaction:
  • "Master E-Raced": A Nazi was shot in the head during World War II. Miraculously, he survived, but the bullet was stuck in his head and located near a major artery. Fifty years later, the former Nazi (now living in New York City) accidentally bumps his head while getting milk from his refrigerator. The bullet finally hits its target and the Kraut goes kaput.
  • "Heart Beat Down": A psychopath in the 1950s is subjected to electro-shock therapy to cure his psychosis. The full effects of the shocks don't hit him until he tries to escape, at which point the arrhythmia from the shocks causes him to have a heart attack.
  • "You're So Vein": A death-row inmate was scheduled to die by lethal injection, gloating at his victims' families as the authorities injected the drugs into his system. However, since the tourniquet was too tight on his arm, the drugs didn't knock him out right away, which shocked the authorities until they eventually ordered the inmate's release. After being released from his restraints, the bastard proceeds to take the IV drop to break the window and scare his victims' families until he drops dead as the lethal cocktail finally reaches his heart.
• Depraved Bisexual:
  • The boss in #118, "Blown-Job", gives a promotion to a man over his female secretary whom he regularly sexually harasses because the man is more willing to give him oral sex.
  • In "Les-Boned", a bisexual nymphomaniac real estate seller seduces men, women, and even couples just to have sex, sell houses and make a great deal of money.
• Dies Wide Open: Some segments will end up with the characters with their eyes open after they have died.
• Dirty Cop: The victim in "Cop Out" is a crooked police officer who takes bribes, squeezes drug dealers and likes to flaunt the authority his badge gives him.
• Dirty Coward: #350, "Harmored Car", where a wannabe pair of robbers hold up an armored car, but being new to the whole robbery thing end up in a shootout with police. Whereas Tyrone stands his ground and opens fire on the responding officers, his partner Eddie immediately hides in the truck. He then peeks out through the rear doors, just as one of the cops' bullets strikes Tyrone in the chest and causes him to slam into the doors - crushing Eddie's neck between them. Tyrone survived thanks to a bulletproof vest but got life in prison; Eddie, obviously, died almost instantly.
• Disney Villain Death:
  • "Goon Interrupted": The victim, a hitman who feigned insanity to avoid prison, dies from falling 50 feet down a laundry chute while trying to escape from a mental hospital.
  • "Falling Down On The Job": Mike, a lazy construction worker who could get away with it for being the boss' son, uses the counterweight system as his personal elevator to climb a building. However, the rope snaps just as he reaches the top because it wasn't designed to lift something as heavy as a human, causing Mike to fall to his death.
  • "UninTented": Fiona, a nymphomaniac woman who kicked her boyfriend, Brad, out of the camping tent for not being able to satisfy her before doing the job herself. A freak wind hoists up the tent with her inside right as she reaches orgasm, sending it flying until it falls on a cabin's tin roof, crushing Fiona's skull.
  • "Guitar Zeros": A pair of Chinese die-hard metalheads rock to metal music after a hard day of work at a toy factory. Both of them are so absorbed in their fantasy, one of them slips off the edge of his bed and falls out the window to his death. His friend, who couldn't bear the loss, lets out a war cry before following suit and throwing himself off the window on purpose.
  • "Habeas Corpse": An Amoral Attorney named Ian Campbell was impressed with his law firm's new offices and liked to hit on female new hires. Moreover, he always pulled a trick to impress them, which consisted of him running into the 40th floor's tempered glass window knowing it would bounce him back. However, the window shatters in his latest attempt after his Rolex hits it first. As a result, the sleazy lawyer plummets 40 stories to his death from a shattered skull, his brains spilled all over the pavement, and a broken spinal cord.
  • "Homie Invasion/Homie's Dead": After the homeowner the burglar killed via a baseball bat revives from his wife's CPR and a rare condition named Lazarus syndrome, he confronts the burglar in the middle of climbing down the rope to escape with the stolen goods. The shock of being confronted by the man he murdered caused him to let go of the rope and fall to his death with a skull fracture and brain hemorrhage.
  • "Handi-crapped" (#190): A Jerkass supervising accountant who faked an injury gets caught by his secretary, who sets out to report him to the boss. When the bastard chases her down to the elevator and she closes the door on him, his motorized chair knocks it off its hinges, causing him to fall five stories down the shaft and die of a massive trauma.
• Disproportionate Retribution: Yes, many of the people portrayed on the show were idiots and/or assholes, but in some of their cases, the horrible way they died was probably far more than what they deserved to have happened to them.
  • "Road Killed": Morning Glory, the nature lover who got hit by a car and decapitated while trying to resuscitate a raccoon that she ran over. Yeah, she was a little nutty and maybe giving CPR to a dead animal isn't necessary or wise, but there was no one on the road when she came to the dead critter on the road, so the driver had all the time in the world to stop or swerve.
  • "Amish-tinguished": Jebediah, the Amish boy on Rumspringa^note A time for Amish teens to go out and live like "normal" teens {i.e., drink, smoke, have premarital sex, drive cars, experience modern technology, wear colorful clothes, etc} before buckling down for a life of work who died from drinking alcohol because his body was genetically incapable of processing it. He just wanted to have fun (considering the sheltered culture he lived in), it wasn't like he was a jerk when he drank, and the Amish don't really believe in modern medicine, so how was the boy supposed to know he had that problem?
  • A stewardess is sucked out of an airplane while she was still alive, freezing to death on her way down. Sure, she may have been a bit cranky and indifferent toward her passengers (as it was her last flight before she retired), but still, that's just awful.
    • And this one's entirely true. This particular death is a reenactment of what happened to Aloha Airlines Flight 243 in 1988. Literally, the only thing they changed was the stewardess being a jerkass.
  • Gunther from "Info-Pain-Ment". Sure, he yells and screams at his two friends, but they were more interested in fooling around than helping him. And one of them even ended up killing him when he used one of Gunther's contraptions in the wrong way. But a bamboo spike in the ear seemed a bit harsh for Gunther.
  • There was a man who got shot in the chest — by a bullet that was fired directly into the air by some more rowdy New Year's celebrators.
  • And the belly dancer who accidentally hanged herself when she tossed her scarf in the air while practicing for an upcoming contest. She did nothing wrong (except leave the ceiling fan on while she was practicing) and actually put herself through veterinarian school with her talent by dancing at Middle Eastern restaurants and nightclubs. At least she died doing what she loved...
  • The Vegas showgirl who contracted a flesh-eating virus from an old, rusty razor and died of sepsis. There was nothing in her story to indicate that she was a bad person — the issue was that because she performed all night and slept all day, she could never find time to get to the store. Essentially, the only thing she did wrong was not be more mindful.
  • The Christian boy who died when a meteorite shot through his chest. Sure, he was a bit awkward, and attempting to push his religion at a drunken frat party wasn't the best way to make friends, but he seemed like a genuinely decent kid who was just trying to socialize.
  • The obnoxious girl who died from Irukandji syndrome (one of the most painful ways to die) after swallowing a jellyfish. She was only that way because she had a friendless childhood and she spent the last minutes of her life feeling her throat swell up, all the while getting painfully stung to death from the inside, with no one to help her because they thought she was faking it.
  • The girl who dies after her breast implants explode from high-altitude air pressure on a plane. Her only crime was getting cheap implants from a Back-Alley Doctor, as a result of her wanting bigger assets.
    • Same deal with the woman who got phony butt implants so she can get with a rapper and suffered an embolism from the bathroom caulk going through her body. The only thing she did wrong was not to go to a legitimate plastic surgeon. (The case might have been inspired by people like Padge "Black Madam" Gordon or Oneal Ron Johnson.)
  • The secretary from "Blown Job" (#118). She refuses to give her boss a blowjob to receive a promotion in return, so she drowns her sorrows in energy drinks. When she finds out that her boss gave the promotion to a male employee who was willing to go down, she confronts him about it...and suffers a heart attack from so much caffeine, effectively making this a Death by Sexual Harassment case.
  • The woman having a long-distance sex play with her husband in which he is tied up. A crook enters the house, robs her and when he talks to her, his halitosis makes her choke on her own vomit. She did nothing except be kinky for her husband. In the meanwhile, the robber goes scot-free.
  • Non-death example with an unsympathetic accounting worker who vowed revenge on his former boss for firing him (even though it was his lack of sympathy towards others and incompetence that cost him his job in the first place) by climbing up an oak tree and attempting to kill his boss surreptitiously when she exits the building. The tables are turned, however, when the former worker suffers vertigo from his allergic reaction to oak pollen and falls off the tree, the impact of hitting the ground causes a paralysis that kills him instantly.
• Disrupting the Theater: One story features a woman who never stopped talking on her cell phone wherever she went and didn't give a shit about whether or not other people were annoyed about it. She then goes to a movie theatre where she pisses off all the moviegoers until her phone explodes from a faulty battery and shrapnel gets lodged in her brain, dying from it minutes later.
• Dodgeball Is Hell: The victim in "Extinguished" is a Jerk Jock who singlehandedly beats the rival team composed of rich nerds at a community dodgeball match out of resentment for their success and because of his promising sports career being ruined by his drug addiction. When his fellow ex-jocks called him out for his excessive violence, he yanks off a nearby extinguisher to shower them, the valve came off from the pressure and lodged itself in his heart, ripping it open and killing him in seconds.
• Does Not Like Men: The Psycho Lesbian who sticks a taser in her vagina thinking it was a vibrator from her girlfriend.
• Dogged Nice Guy: The Orthodox Jew who tried to get a hula dancer to like him in "Poi Vey."
• The Dog Bites Back:
  • "Grilled": In a Chinese jewelry factory, the workers are abused so badly by the Bad Boss that they give him a poisoned "grill" that kills him by halting his protein production.
  • "Scam Eye Am (Dead)": The victim of a 419 Scam tracks the Con Man down after finding out and inflicts a lethal Eye Scream on him via a door hook where he hid.
  • "Handi-crapped": When a woman working at an accounting firm finds out her abusive manager is only pretending to be injured, she immediately heads upstairs to report it to the higher-ups.
• Dog Walks You: An unemployed woman who reluctantly takes a dog-walking job gets pulled by a pack of dogs and gets fatally nailed in the head when she slams into a tree.
• Domestic Abuse: Nigel in "Mile Die Club" is an abusive husband to his wife Naomi. When she boards a plane to leave him, he sneaks into the cargo hold and ends up freezing to death as the plane climbs.
• Don't Try This at Home: ...You Will Die! Naturally, part of the disclaimer at the beginning of the show. And as if that's not enough to hammer the point home, they also flash an "Idiot Alert" when someone on screen does something so dangerous and idiotic that imitating their actions will not only get you killed, but you will deserve it for being so stupid.
• Dragged Off to Hell: What the narrator said happened to the fake preacher in Cruci-Fried and the two Hurricane Katrina thieves in Who Ded.
• Dragon with an Agenda: Faye was this in "Chef Boy-R-Dead". She was the second in command in a restaurant but was only there to steal her boss' recipes.
• Drill Sergeant Nasty:
  • "Mudder Sucked": Harriet was the daughter of a Marine drill instructor on top of the leader of a sorority. As expected of someone like that, she physically and psychologically abuses the pledges like the real deal.
  • "Bad Laps": Stu, a former drill sergeant who became an instructor for a women's swimming class, subjected the women in there to Training from Hell, especially by cranking up the pool's temperature. After he and the women swim 20 laps as part of an endurance test in the simmering-hot pool, his neoprene wetsuit caught the pool's heat and caused him to die from hyperthermia in the middle of swimming.
• Drinking on Duty:
  • "Toilet Rolled": A steamroller operator gets drunk on the job and forgets to set the roller's brake when climbing down to go use a nearby port-a-potty. Need I tell you what happens next?
  • "Constriction Accident": A dump truck driver shows up for work hungover and accidentally buries a co-worker in the sand while said co-worker digs a ditch. It ends with the poor guy dying from crush asphyxia despite his other coworkers' best efforts to dig him out and save him.
• Driven to Suicide: A lackluster Japanese rockstar (from the same band as the one featured in "Coffin To Death," which featured his bandmate getting suffocated inside a coffin that contained dry ice) commits seppuku after realizing how much of a failure he is.
• Drunk Driver:
  • In "D.U. Die", a drunken motorist suffering from a bout of carsickness sticks his head out the window to puke...and is decapitated by a mailbox, to the horror of his equally drunken passenger.
  • In "Drunk Die-er" a serial drunk driver has an accident and was mistakenly declared dead on the scene. The paramedics discover that he's an organ donor, and thus they have his organs harvested while he was still alive.