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Funny / Internet Historian

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  • The Great iPhone Massacre
    • As he talks about how the LAPD had to issue a tweet telling people to not microwave their iPhones, IH is posing like he's in some cologne ad, wearing a policeman's uniform, and wondering aloud how the people calling the police were able to after having exploded their cell phones.
    • Not all the inconveniences are pranks that brick phones of those gullible enough to actually fall for it:
    IH!Steve Jobs: [takes some parting shots with a rifle] But there's one last thing! We put a tiny seam at the side of your iPhone 6, so that it pulled out your hair every time you put your phone up your face. I made that design decision. I thought it was funny.
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  • The Bikelock Fugitive describes the event in question like it's a World of Warcraft session. The bikelock is described as a mace with added stun and bleed effects, and the medics who performed first aid to the injured man are described as priests.
  • Seize the Day
    IH: And then they have sex, and it's... pretty graphic.
    • When going over Kurt's bizarre excuse of him and his sons trying to prove to his wife that tentacle porn exists
    IH: The problem is, B-Chiku doesn't have any tentacle porn. [cuts to a screenshot of him being blocked on Twitter by Kurt] He claims it is difficult to find, so let's test that. [jingle plays, splash screens of a tutorial before cutting to Google] Okay, and we type it into Google... and there's about 8 links. What about the images? [several blurred images based on the search appear] Yep, every one of those is an affront to God.
  • The Failure of Rainfurrest
    • There's a part where IH explains injuries led to people actually having to go to the hospital. The accompanying footage of an ambulance shows that it's a veterinarian ambulance.
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    • The con was announced as being cancelled permanently shortly after IH finished the video. Rather than go back and edit the ending where he says they'll have to wait and see what happens next year, he just tacks on a hilariously blunt coda noting that no, it's actually just gone forever.
  • The Harry Potter Skirmishes
    • When going over the kinds of people that the series fostered:
      IH: Second, the gamblers. Thousands of individuals, betting hundreds of thousands of dollars on the outcome of the story. Who would die next? [shows a video of one guy trying to run through Platform 9 3/4 and smacking against the wall, showing the You died screen] Who would Harry hook up with? [shows an infamous Daniel Radcliffe picture of an Equus production]
  • The Y2K Apoclypse
    • The the start of the video, IH lights a match in his Y2K survival bunker. As the video goes on, the fire from the match continues to spread, first setting his hair on fire, then lighting up the bunker, then causing stuff in the bunker to explode. And throughout it all, IH remains completely calm, seemingly not even noticing the fire.
  • The Fall of 76
    • After going over the pre-launch hype for Fallout 76, IH proceeds to showcase the vast amount of issues and less-than-enthused player reactions it had at launch. But surely the professional reviewers will show that the game isn't as bad as everyone claims, right? Cut to the (very) low scores from major publications falling onto the game and nuking it.
    • The sketch during the ad break:
    (starts with Will Smith looking through the binoculars, badly acted) Look, there's a meteor headed straight to Earth! (a cursor plays the video of the asteroid doing just that) Oh my god! We must do something! Was anyone curious enough to read about it online?
    "Not me!"
    "Not me either!"
    Oh nooo! Now people think I'm dumb and I have died a virgin! (tries to imitate an explosion sound)note 
    Pl-please. Look, I need- I need sponsors. I- I bought a lifetime supply of toilet paper, thinking I was saving money, but then I left it out in the rain and the crows got it, and now I'm back to square one. Please.
    • The Power Armor edition gets universally savaged over sending nylon bags to customers instead of the advertised canvas bags. Given the understandably bad press on top of existing bad press, Bethesda had to come up with a cunning and foolproof plan to calm everyone down. Their brilliant solution was to post a message offering 500 Atoms ($5 dollar's worth of in-game currency, costing Bethesda nothing to give away) for compensation... for a pre-order edition that cost anywhere between $200 to $300 worth of real money for their customers to order. The following is IH's theory on Bethesda's fantasy regarding customer reactions was, prior to announcing the offer:
    Fan 1: 500 Atoms?! Fuck yeah!
    Fan 2: What are you going to do with your Atoms?
    Fan 3: I'm going to buy five-eighteenths of the white paint version of the Power Armor!note 
    Fan 1: WHOOOOOOA! What about you?
    Fan 4: Light wood laminate! Light wood laminate! Light wood laminate!note 
    Fan 1: (gasps) Fuck the bag!
    Fan 3: He's right! Fuck the bag!
    All fans: Light wood laminate! Light wood laminate! Light wood laminate! Light wood laminate!...
  • Going Camping at the End of the World
    • The Insane Troll Logic of Camping's "mathematical" predictions.
    • The hilarious Irony of Camping's teachings is that they actually go against the religious scriptures of the Bible. Even the major churches of the world denounced Camping, but he ignored them because he believed they were corrupt anyway.
      Matthew 24:36: But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone.
    • When Internet Historian is trying to make the point that other denominations of Christianity consider predicting the end of the world a sin, he shows various quotes and accompanying images. When he gets to the Quakers, he shows a screenshot of Quake, with the quote, "Shit! Just overshot LZ Command. Command, you copy? Christ, this thing is a prick! I have no flight control, repeat, no flight control."
    • As Camping's predictions began to receive media coverage, the Internet inevitably caught wind of it and decided to do what they do best... meme the hell out of it.
      • One particular instance involved people scattering clothes around their neighborhoods and workplaces to make it appear that they were ascended to heaven by God.
      • The second was more successful, where people attached sex dolls to balloons, and sent them into the sky, so they could be with God. Oh, and God yoinks one of them for his own pleasure.
        Memer: I should have been a better person!
      • One Facebook user also attempted to organize a nation-wide orgy. Sadly, no one came, which IH attributes to the vague location (namely, "The Streets of America, Baby").
    • How IH transitions to the ad break:
      IH: But first: (cuts to the infamous Rappin' for Jesus)
      Pastor: My rhymes are fly, my beats are sick!
      My crew is big, and it keeps gettin' bigga.
      That's 'cuz Jesus Christ is my–
      IH: Ad time!
    • Historian talks a bit about infamous doomsday predictor Mary Bateman who foretold the rapture by writing "Christ is Coming" onto eggs that she shoved into the rear end of her hen and forcing it to lay it back out and how she was claimed a witch, poisoned a couple with pudding, was later hanged, then...
      Historian: Strips of skin from her corpse were tanned and sold as magic charms to ward off evil spirits, what the fuck am I reading?
    • The Historian's, frankly, blank but palpable reaction to the world not ending when 6:00 PM came, as if perfectly summing up what must have been going through Camping and his followers' minds.
      Historian: Uh oh. Nothing happened.
    • Although it can considered a bit of a Tear Jerker, since Fitzpatrick thought the world was going to end and blew almost all his life savings on promoting the event, when nothing inevitably happened, he reveals he didn't water his plants or even do his dishes... which are still waiting for him at home.
    • Thanos boogeying down in celebration of the Rapture not happening. No, you did not read that wrong.
    • God taking credit for giving Harold Camping a stroke not long after his second prediction that the end of the world would happen in October of 2011, hoping that it would teach him a lesson. Harold died 2 years later in a stairway-related accident in his home. God tries to pass the blame.

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