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Creator / Eddie Izzard

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"Je suis un travesti executif... un travesti d'action!"

"So... uh... I'd better explain the tits. Um... didn't have those at school. Wanted to, but not in the school curriculum, even though I asked."

So, uh... yeah. So! Eddie Izzard! Born Edward John Izzard on February 7, 1962, he's a British stand-up comedian and actor, notable for his style of rambling, free-associating monologues with pantomimic sketches, with Conversational Troping by the fistful should he veer onto the subjects of TV and cinema (which he will) and even uses Wikipedia to do his research. He is known for being an "action!" Transvestite (or, if you prefer, Executive Transvestite) as well his numerous, various roles in film and TV.

He's one of the few comedians who can perform in multiple languages: starting as bit parts about learning European languages (like Latin), he has gone on to do entire gigs in French and German. He's even done Labour Party gigs. As for his acting career, Izzard has appeared in several movies and theatre productions and has covered a wide range of both serious and eccentric roles (several of which are supervillains). As with most comedians, you can expect to spot him here and there — some of his most notable roles in the past decade cover master thief, Nazi defector, serial killer and... a talking car. And a talking mouse too.


On 27 July 2009, Izzard began a seven week mega-marathon run around the UK to raise money for Sport Relief. He had never done any serious running until the month before. He ran six days a week for 51 days, covering at least 27 miles per day, carrying a flag for each county in which he rannote , from London to Cardiff to Belfast to Edinburgh and back to London. He completed his 1,110 mile run on 15 September 2009 at Potters Bay and rescued a kitten along the way. Izzard was 47 years old at the time, and had completed his first marathon just three months before. In 2016, he ran 27 marathons in 27 days in South Africa, in tribute to Nelson Mandela (one marathon for each of his years in prison). More recently, Eddie has been aiming to finally perform his twenty-seven marathons across Africa for Sport Relief, doing so despite being fifty-four.


In addition to crossdressing, he's spoken publicly about his non-binary gender identity. He has expressed an interest in running for Mayor of London in the 2020 city elections too.

This man is so highly thought of as a comedian and performer that Thy Lord the Comedy God Himself, John Cleese, described him as the "Lost Python" (Izzard hosted a documentary and appeared with the remaining members of the troupe on BBC Two for their 30th anniversary). Eddie's most recent show Force Majeure was successful enough to continue across five continents - despite starting in 2013, and having the show released on home video while still touring, he still continued to sell out venues, playing dates in the USA up until July of the following year.

"Wo ist das Trope, mein Herr? Wo ist das Trope?"

  • 20% More Awesome: In one show he promised to be 10% funnier than usual since the show was being recorded. Then he mused on how impossible that was to verify "unless you brought a sort of laughometer".
  • All of Them: Used in the "Trojan Horse" sketch to describe the Greek navy.
  • Alliterative Family: He jokes that Hannibal (the Carthaginian, not the cannibal) had three brothers named Hasdrubal, Havaball and Havabanana. As it happens, Hasdrubal did have a brother called Hamilcar, but that's not as funny.
  • Anachronism Stew
  • Animal Stereotypes: Played with for Pavlov's Cat, which is more...creatively uncooperative than actually malevolent.
  • As Long as It Sounds Foreign: Martin Luther:
    The Protestant faith was different. That was about Martin Luther, this German guy who pinned a note on a door saying, "'Ang on a minute!" But in German, so, "Ein minuten bitte! Ich haben eine kleine problemo... avec diese religioné." (beat) He was from everywhere."
  • Back for the Finale: Weird characters mentioned throughout the show tend to come back at the end for a last comment, especially Mrs. Badcrumble. Lampshaded in "Stripped".
  • Bilingual Bonus: In his most recent tour incarnation, there's a sketch that involves two Roman soldiers speaking in Latin to each other; the "Latin" quickly devolves into a weird mosh of Latin, German, French, and English. In order to prove the superiority of English as a way of avoiding Poor Communication Kills. "Mit Elephanten." "Quod. The. Fuck."
    • In Dress to Kill he does a bit about how he believes that "D'you want a cup of coffee?" is a highly successful pick-up line. Later, he more or less repeats that bit in French, then says "If you don't speak French, by the way, all that was fucking funny." He also, by way of one of his characters, recaps the film Speed in French.
  • Black Belt in Origami: in the show Sexie, he claims to have one in "Sashimi".
    "If you know sushi, it's like that, raw fish, and you Fling. Raw fish. At people. Salmon! Salmon! Tuna! Salmon! ...Salmon! Tuna! The white one that's horrible! ...And that only gives you about ten seconds of shock where they're going, 'What the fuck? ...This is fish!' And when they're in the 'Whaaaa,' you go, 'Wasabi!!' "
  • Black Comedy: "Hi, I'm Crazy Eddie! I put babies on spikes! You want a rack o' babies? We got babies on racks!"
  • Brick Joke: Oh so much. He constantly references back to earlier jokes and characters in his routines. In fact, his routines are often just one brick joke after another.
    "And this is our leader, Mister Dog."
    "Fucking handbag! ...With a brick in it! It's the Queen!"
    • Sometimes wraps up his routine with every character earlier referenced, bringing together Caesar, Pavlov, Mrs. Badcrumble, Robbie Burns and Noah on a shpeedboat.
  • Buffy Speak: Often used intentionally as well as somewhat unintentionally due to his stream-of-consciousness style.
  • Call-Back: Extremely frequent; while some are a Brick Joke, most shows have several vague, irrelevant references to earlier that can be extremely confusing unless you caught it the first time.
    [During the conclusion of Definite Article]
    Mother Nature: Pavlov, what are you doing here?
    Pavlov: Well, I've been trying to do things and (mumbles) ...banjo. (bell rings) Ooh, I’m hungry now!
    Mother Nature: Next we have... sheep! Good haircut, by the way [...] You wearing Blakeys? Mouse, what are you doing here?
    Mouse: [As Robert Burns (with a Sean Connery accent)] Well, I've got a space rocket out of jam... It won’t work, but... it’s not my best laid plan. I could go aglay... but Mrs. Badcrumble is coming, and Caesar, and the Australian guy...
    • Especially so in Force Majeure, where he ends up calling back to a few gags from several years ago. Granted, it works without prior knowledge, but it will be confusing if you don't know the Death Star catering bit from his previous tour.
  • Chalk Outline: Captain Transvestite, the superhero who spends too long putting on make-up to actually help the dying person, but at least he can use it to draw a line round the body for the police.
  • Chekhov's Gun: Literally! In Dress To Kill early on he talks about how a kid grabbed a bunch of his grandfather's "arsenal" of weapons and went and shot up his school. Later on he's talking about how much he hates Scooby Doo characters other than Scooby and Shaggy.
    Scrappy-Doo, a magnum... [pretends to shoot a gun] ...thank you Grandad.
  • The Coats Are Off: Spartan sheep shear themselves before a fight in order to invoke this.
  • Continuity Nod: His shows always feature little scenes with imaginary characters, who later start to appear in each other's scenes, eventually coming all together in the finale.
    • Also, his latest show Stripped contains references to his earlier shows.
      Half of you are now laughing, and the other half is going "What the hell is he talking about?"
    • Specifically, as of a gig in April 2010, after a Call-Back:
      [after half the audience's insane reaction to "covered with bees"]
      "If you don't get why they are laughing, I'm not going to explain it to you. Some people are just bee enthusiasts... I'm a bee enthusiast!"
    • A massive one occurs in the Force Majeure show, when he returns to the famous Death Star Canteen skit from Circle, culminating in a battle between God and Darth Vader.
  • Convenience Store Gift Shopping: The Three Wise Men are forced to do this when Baby J demands birthday presents on top of his Christmas presents.
    • "Ahh, Baby J, we bring you 20 cigarettes.... A Diet Coke.... and a SACK OF CHARCOAL!"
    • Eddie himself does this in a YouTube video.
  • Crushing Handshake: He calls this the "I've got a small penis" handshake.
  • Determinator:
    • Despite not having done any real preparation, he ran 1100 miles around the UK for Sport Relief, running the equivalent of a marathon a day for six days a week for 51 days. The accompanying documentary showed how much he struggled physically and mentally, but he never gave up even as he was breaking down and finished the gargantuan task for himself. He was given a special award in recognition of his accomplishment.
    • Also, his documentary, "Believe" falls into this. It is unbelievable how hungry he was to make it big, even at times when he was competing against the likes of Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie.
  • Dissimile: From the documentary following his multi-marathon run around the UK:
    Week 2: base camp. It's like Everest but if Everest was really flat...if you took Everest and put it down. So there's none of that up... and there's the snow... no snow... but you're running... Oh forget it.
  • Dude Looks Like a Lady: Averted. He wears women's clothing, but doesn't really attempt to "pass". He's just a bloke who happens to be wearing a dress.
    [In response to an interviewer's remark that he is well known for wearing "women's dresses"]
    They're not women's dresses. They're my dresses, I bought them.
  • Everything's Better with Monkeys: "Le singe est sur la branche!" Originally this was "le singe est dans l'arbre", until someone pointed out that it meant the monkey is inside the tree.note 
  • Everything's Better with Dinosaurs:
    "'Raargh! Wuurgh! Larrgh!' Said Jesus, trying to blend in."
  • Everyone Looks Sexier If French: Mentioned in one of his sketches in Dress To Kill. According to him, French actors play more "esoteric" characters in American movies: "Hello, my name is Pierre. I come from Paris. I have come to have sex with your family." "Help yourself!"
  • Exactly What It Says on the Tin: His latest bad impression of Christopher Walken, during his 'Sexie' show, is So Bad, It's Good.
  • Genre Blindness:
    • Wonderfully parodied in the bit he did about horror movies - "I've got an idea, lets go camping in the Forest Of Death And Blood!" "Hey look, there's something moving in the forest about eight miles off! I'll just go and check."
    • Later he does a strange version of Breaking the Fourth Wall; he says that the people in those movies should listen to the music. Normally, he says, people would hear the music and turn back. He mimes going in various directions while humming ominous music. He chooses another direction and starts humming happy music. He chooses that path. Whereas, he says, the people in the movies are just idiots! They're just going along, saying "Fuck off, you cellists!"
  • Genre Savvy: He points out that no vampire would be a threat in real life as we're all too genre savvy, and we'd all do the sign of the cross, stake through the heart, and then garlic bread.
  • A Good Name for a Rock Band: "Guns 'n' Banjos".
  • Heroic RRoD: The documentary accompanying his cross-UK marathon showed that his body truly was breaking down and well-meaning, but conflicting, advice was making it worse. But he powered through to complete his task.
  • Hurricane of Excuses: "I was dead at the time! I was on the moon! With Steve!"
  • Idiot Ball: Not by Eddie himself, but from the Watchdog report, courtesy of Anne Robinson. The basis for their report that he was supposedly recycling jokes from one tour to the next, when Eddie had actually just used similar jokes from his Dressed to Kill tour in his Circle tour, and the former of which hadn't been a UK tour but had seen a DVD release. Never mind the fact that some comedians recycle one joke to make up their entire career, or that musicians have a catalogue of greatest hits, but Circle had tons of cool stuff that wasn't in DTK, including the debut of Jeff Vader - runs the Death Star?.
  • I Like My X Like I Like My Y: Eddie likes his women like he likes his coffee: hot and strong, and with a spoon in them; or in a plastic cup; or covered in BEES!
  • Improvised Cross: One of his early stand-up routines has him discussing whether or not a finger-cross would ward off a vampire, which would essentially make Dracula more of an annoyance than a terrifying monster. Also, if your crucifix has been broken and looks more like a T-sign, can you still use it to ward off a vampire by holding it with your thumb stuck above it?
  • I Need to Go Iron My Dog:
    "My grandmother is on fire."
    "My cat's exploded."
    "I was with Steve! On the Moon!"
  • Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain:
    • He jokes about how Mussolini said Italians were fascist, but they really weren't:
      Mussolini said, "Right, we're all fascists," but most Italian people are always on scooters going, "Ciao!" ...And they're into football! And life! And they're not fascists. He said, "We're all fascists!" "Uh... All right, ciao!" No helmet on. All those 50's films like Roman Holiday. Everyone's just cool and hangs out.
    • Then there's his Darth Vader. "I am not Mr Stevens! I could kill you with a thought!"
    • Dracula and other "low-powered" vampires. Particularly post chainsaw.
    • The Spanish Inquisition as done by the Church of England, which segued into his eventual "Cake or Death?" routine:
      Eddie: The Spanish Inquisition would've never worked with the Church of England! (miming torture) "Talk, will you! Talk!" "But it hurts!" "Right, well loosen it up a bit for him..."
  • Informed Attribute: Played for Laughs: a few times after a long non-English bit, Eddie concludes by assuring those in the audience who don't speak the language that all of the preceding material had in fact been really funny.
  • Inherently Funny Words: A staple technique. He's particularly fond of the name Jeff.note 
    • And "jam".
    • Jeff, the Roman God of Biscuits!
    • And Kenneth.
    • Also Azerbaijan.
  • Insane Troll Logic: His show occasionally descends into this. At one point, he "proved" the story of Noah's Ark was false by having giant squid complain about the lack of hand towels. He also claimed that anything which could swim or fly would have gotten away scot-free, and that the world should have been overrun by evil ducks and pilot fish as a result (the pilot fish with the huge teeth and the little light on their forehead. Yes).
  • It Will Never Catch On: "Jeff Fire, you are never gonna be famous!"
    Dr. Heimlich: No! My name is going to be famous in restaurants!
  • Lame Pun Reaction:
    • He once joked: "I was a very driven boy scout. Driven everywhere, I was." Ironically, the audience laughs, and he then groans at the fact that they actually laughed.
    • And then there was King Menelaos, who was a sponge cake.
    • And there's the Ottoman Empire, full of furniture for some reason...
    • From a show in Dallas:
    And so God created all these animals, but there's no food, so eventually they're all following Him around, saying 'We're hungry!' so God says 'Err ... badgers eat bok choi!' 'No we don't. And it's pak choi.' 'No, it's bok choi! Mandarin!' 'Cantonese.' 'Fine, you eat ... sprouting broccoli.' 'Eww.' 'I see badgers can be choosers!'" Cue massive audience groan. "What? You've heard too many pak choi, bok choi, sprouting broccoli, badger creationist jokes this week? Oh yeah, up to here. We're wading through them this Christmas. That old chestnut. Fuck off."
    • From his Dress to Kill show:
    Swindon here. We're monitoring you on our instruments. We've got you on a tuba. More quiet laughter"That should be a bigger laugh for that joke, I think".
    • One of his earliest jokes, and the origin of his 'jam' catchphrase:
    "I went out last night had a few jars, then I went to another pub and had a few jars, then I went home and had another few jars. God I've got to stop eating so much jam.”
  • Lampshade Hanging: He does this a lot when the jokes don't get as much laughter as he had expected. This usually gets a much better round of laughter.
    • "Oh ho, you fucked up there, mate! No one laughed at that!"
    • "Why are Sean Connery and James Mason playing cows? And why does Izzard have to announce his impressions before he does them?"
    • "Oh, I've got your scythe! Very was a mime problem, I think."
    • "Sporadic laugh, that was! It's like I've gone in and removed some of your entrails!"
    • [mimes taking note on hand] "Should be funnier."
    • [small amount of laughter] "Please, don't laugh too much."
    • "And as the audience worked that joke out..."
    • "Good comedy situation, I thought!"
  • Left It In: This trope is practically a catchphrase of his, saying "We'll cut that out" usually once per show.
    "Baby Jesus": Sack of charcoal?
    Eddie: They've always got them at petrol stations. Yes, very funny gag, in England and France. Not in America, it goes down like a lead balloon.
    "Baby Jesus": What, don't they have sacks of charcoal at late-night-
    Eddie: No, they don't have it, it's a different thing.
    "Baby Jesus": So did you cut it out of the show?
    Eddie: No, kept it in, couldn't be buggered.
  • Look Behind You: "Oh, look over there, a badger with a gun!"
  • Loophole Abuse: In Circle, when Jesus tells the rich "It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven", the rich respond by getting blenders and very fine liquid jets, liquidising camels into a paste and trying to squirt the paste through a needle's eye.
  • Metaphorgotten: "I like my women how I like my coffee... COVERED IN BEES!"
    • ", and strong. ...With a spoon in 'em."
    • " a plastic cup."
    • "They say that Britain and America are two countries separated by the... Atlantic Ocean. And that's true."
    • "...Separated by a Common Language, and a lot of fish. Which is true, we do have a lot of fish between us."
    • "Guns don't kill people, people kill people. But monkeys do too (if they've got a gun)."
      • "Guns don't kill people, people do. But you know, I think the gun helps, you know?"
      • "No, bullets kill people, actually."
      • "It's the bullet ripping through the body! That's what kills them! Huh!"
    • "Like the National Rifle Association says, 'It's not guns that kill people - it's maneouvres.'"
      • "It's just that certain noise they make."
  • "Metaphor" Is My Middle Name: From the introduction bit to his Glorious concert DVD "Danger could be my middle name... But it's John."
  • A Million Is a Statistic: He talks about this in regards to all the people killed by mass murderers, and how the public tends to be less affected by higher death tolls (this eventually segues into his "Cake or Death?" monologue).
    Eddie: Someone's killed 100,000 people, we're almost going... "Well done! You killed 100,000 people? You must get up very early in the morning!"
  • Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: Spartan ninja sheep.
  • No Ending: His early shows tend to abruptly cut off when he runs out of material. Lampshaded in "Dress to Kill": "I do like to end a show with that kind of '...oh.' feeling." Later shows instead have all the characters he's mentioned previously come Back for the Finale.
  • Omniglot: It's not uncommon for his routines to stray into foreign languages. Especially of note as, not only can Eddie speak Latin, but he is fluent enough in French and German that he performs non-English routines when touring Europe.
    "Je dois partir maintenant parce que ma grand-mère est flambée..."
  • ...Or So I Heard:
    In the old days [of the internet], porn would take forever to download, do you remember that? ...Friends tell me. ...Friends who can spell "porn."
  • Our Slogan Is Terrible:
    There was a big advertising campaign that said "Buy Mr. Dog for small yappy-type dogs, and maybe they'll shut the fuck up."
  • Overly Long Gag: Engelbert Humperdinck's dead. Or is he? No, he's fine. Or is he?
  • The Password Is Always "Swordfish": "The guy who made the software was called Jeff Jeffty Jeff. Born on the first of Jeff, nineteen-jeffty-jeff."
  • Percussive Maintenance: "And you SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER!"
    • "MAKE the NOISE! I LIVE for the NOISE!"
      • Which was in relation to osteopathy. So, percussive maintenance of the spine. Ouch.
  • Pluralses: In Definite Article:
    I hang-glide; you hang-glide; he/she hang-glides; we hang-glid; you hang-glidded; they hang-gliddededed.
  • Pull Yourself Down the Spear: He has a long segment in his "Stripped" tour about a soldier trying this to defeat the enemy's extra-long spears.
  • The Queen's Latin
  • Real Trailer, Fake Movie: The "Lust for Glorious" trailer from Glorious, which advertises the mockumentary as some sort of high-octane action movie.
  • Realistic Diction Is Unrealistic: Intentionally averted.
  • Rearrange the Song: The intro music to his Dress to Kill special is a remixed version of that of Glorious. In addition, Glorious' theme appears on the Dress to Kill CD.
  • Recursive Reality: Apparently Jesus' birth involved Christmas presents and even had a nativity set up.
  • Red Shirt: When Steve from the accounts department beams down with Captain Kirk, he's probably not coming back.
  • Running Gag: Izzard's Scottish clarinet teacher Mrs. Badcrumble, James Mason and Sean Connery playing various historical figures because they're the only voices he can do (Mason is almost always God), and jam is always mentioned in some shape or form. Extras will almost always be named either Steve or Jeff.
  • Rule of Three: Izzard himself has stated in an interview that he often draws humor this way.
    Sometimes you're hoovering away and it makes that funny noise. "A-jig-a-jig-a-jig-a-jig-a." And you carry on hoovering, thinking "Was that a bit of grit? Was that a piece of money? Or was that the treasure of the Sierra Madre?"
  • Rule 34:
    In the Fifties, the Queen was kinda sexy, in a... not-very-sexy kinda way... but she was. "Fancy the Queen! Yeah, got her picture on my locker-room door! Shag the Queen!"
  • Self-Imposed Challenge: Discussed in the "Stoned Olympics" sketch:
    At the Olympics, performance-enhancing drugs are banned, fair enough, but performance-debilitating drugs should not be. If you can smoke a joint and still win the 100m, fair play to you!
  • Sex Sells: "Oh look! Those two people like it. And they're shagging..."
  • Shaped Like Itself: When discussing becoming a beekeeper:
    I wanna be a beekeeper! I wanna... keep bees. Don't want them to get away, wanna keep them!
  • Sliding Scale of Anthropomorphism: Fruit falls under "Inanimate, sentient plants", according to the spectrum described. Oranges are likened to the crew of Das Boot ("Kaptain: Zey are breaking in mit Finger Depth-Charges!" "Haff ze rind only come off in schmall chunks!" "Zey are schtill coming through!" "Push ze pips into bits zey vouldn't expect!"), and pears time their ripening to when humans aren't around for giggles.
  • Slower Than A Speeding Bullet: Provides the page quote.
  • Sophisticated as Hell: Does this a lot.
    • On his early attempts to chat up girls:
    "I didn't have the power to say, "Susan, I saw you in class today, as the sun shone with a brilliant light that caught your hair. It was haloed. You turned, your eyes flashed fire into my soul. I immediately read the words of Dostoevsky and Karl Marx, and in the words of Albert Schweitzer: "I FANCY YOU!""
    • Also described Adolf Hitler as "a Nazi shithead... as many eminent historians have pointed out".
  • Spot of Tea: Tea and Cake, or Death!
    • Certainly. Tea for this man's breasts! Anything else, sir?
  • Stealth Pun: "If we ever saw Dracula, we'd all do sign of the cross, and then we'd do stake to the heart, and then we'd do garlic bread...perhaps garlic bread as a starter, and then the stake."
  • The Cavalry: Referenced by name when Izzard says America showed up two years late for WWII "because you'd been watching US Cavalry movies."
  • Take a Third Option: Near the end of the "Cake or Death?" routine, somebody opts for cake and is informed that there's none left, only death. "Well, I'll take the chicken, then."
    Tastes of human, sir!
  • The Tape Knew You Would Say That: In Definite Article Izzard does a bit wherein a tape teaching French corrects the listener.
    Tape: Ou est la plume de ma tante? Monsieur, ou est la plume de ma tante? [Where is my aunt's pen? Mister, where is my aunt's pen?]
    Izzard: La plume de ma tante est pres de la chaise de ma tante. [My aunt's pen is near my aunt's chair.] As well you know.
    Tape: Oui, la plume de ma tante est pres de la chaise de ma tante. [Yes, my aunt's pen is near my aunt's chair.]
    Tape: Ou est la plume de mon oncle? [Where is my uncle's pen?]
    Izzard: La plume de mon oncle est bingy bongy boogy bongy.
    Tape: Non! Pas de tout! Je ne me connais pas bingy bongy boogy bongy! Qu'est-ce que vous dites?! Vous est un putain! [No! Not at all! I don't know bingy bongy boogy bongy! What are you saying?! You are a whore!]
    Izzard: Je suis pas un putain. Je n'avais pas le sexe pour l'argent. Que c'est vous dites, vous cassette? [I am not a whore. I don't take sex for money. What are you saying, you cassette?]
    Tape: Oh, oh pardon. Je suis désolé. Vous avez raison. [singing] Je suis seulement pauvre cassette. Et je, je n'avais pas le pantalon. [Oh, oh pardon me. I'm sorry. You're right. I am only a poor cassette. And I, I have no trousers.]
    Tape: Wo ist das Kind, mein Herr? Wo ist das Kind? [Where is the child, sir? Where is the child?]
    Izzard: Das Kind ist in dem Flughafen. [The child is at the airport.] As well you know.
    Tape: Ja, das Kind ist in dem Flughaben. Aber warum? [Yes, the child is at the airport. But why?]
    Izzard: Well, I’m not really sure. Perhaps he likes the airplanes.
  • Tastes Like Chicken:
    Airline passenger: I'll take the chicken, then, please.
    Cabin staffperson (encouragingly): Tastes of human, sir.
  • Timmy in a Well: With Sharky the friendly shark (but not that friendly).
    • He just happens to rescue a lot of one-legged kids: what of it? They were one-legged when he found them. Really.
  • Trademark Favorite Food: Not to eat but to talk about: jam. Probably because it's an Inherently Funny Word.
  • Trans Equals Gay: He's had to deal with the fact that many people assume he's gay because of his crossdressing, when in fact he identifies as heterosexual. One routine had him pointing out that even though people like to equate gay men and drag queens, there is "a crowbar separation" between the two.
    Most transvestites fancy girls, you can tell people that. "Most transvestites fancy girls." "Who told you that?" "A transvestite told me that!"
  • Translation by Volume: He did a bit about this trope (talking loudly and/or slowly to foreigners), where Brits in France would try to order the same foods from home, but speak with greater volume and enunciation.
  • Turbine Blender: When a bird gets sucked into an engine they call it "birdstrike". It's not birdstrike, it's "enginesuck"!
  • Unexplained Recovery: He tells a story about taking a chartered plane to a gig. Every time he complained about the pilot having eaten the complimentary cookies, the pilot would threaten to crash the plane. They ended up hitting a mountain. Eddie died!
  • Unplugged Version: Stripped. Izzard felt that his outfits and routines were becoming too elaborate. For this tour, he decided to go simple and wear men's clothing in the form of a dress shirt and jeans with a tailcoat for a touch of flair while simplifying his set so he didn't go off on as many tangents.
  • Verbal Backspace: "You! Cake or death?" "Um, death, please—no! Cake! CAKE! Sorry..."
  • Verbal Tic: "So... yeah." Acknowledged and occasionally lampshaded ("So... affirmative.")
    • The back original video box of 'Glorious' was completely plain except for a simple 'So... Yeah' written in tiny script.
    • And this is all true.
  • Villains Out Shopping: "I will have the penne al'arrabiata."
  • Vulgar Humor:
    • Notably averted. He does curse a lot in his act fairly liberally, but he seldom - if ever - does any truly vulgar material. And even with the cursing "fuck" is never in reference to sex (which he calls "shagging"), and "shit" is never a reference to excrement (which he calls "poo"). The end result is that he swears a lot, but the act as a whole comes off childlike and charming, and his DVDs are easily rendered family-friendly by applying the bleeped audio option which is always included.
  • What the Hell Is That Accent?: During the James Bond bit in Definite Article, there is a Russian agent whose voice, courtesy of Izzard's usual skill with accents, slides all over the place without ever quite hitting Russia. Lampshaded: Bond challenges him on it, and the agent claims that he has an experimental voice synthesizer that allows him to imitate any accent but unfortunately it's currently stuck on the shop demonstration setting.
  • Wholesome Crossdresser: Izzard himself, though he prefers the term "Executive Transvestite" or "Action Transvestive". He's also straight, which is not that unusual in Real Life.
    • During his Stripped Tour, he claimed to be a Retired Transvestite now. He's stated it's ironic now that, because of the Stripped tour, he has to go on TV insisting that he's still a transvestite, when he spent much of his life trying to hide it.
  • Women's Mysteries: Hopscotch. What happened here?
  • Who Names Their Kid "Dude"?: Lampshaded and then some in the Engelbert Humperdinck routine.
    "What shall we call our son so he does not get the shit kicked out of him at school?"
    "We shall call him Engelbert!"
    "Yes, that'll work!"
  • Worst Aid : How the Heimlich Maneuver came to be, according to him.
    • Okay, then maybe with a frying pan...
    • A fist! A hand! Hoocha hoocha hoocha LOBSTER.
  • You Meddling Kids: Referenced to and lampshaded as Izzard often does.
    God (as James Mason): *listens to Jesus go on a rant about various Christian groups* And what does the Holy Ghost think of all this?
    Jesus: Oh, he's useless, dad, got a sheet over his head these days.
    Holy Ghost: ...Whooooh, Holy Ghost, Holy Ghost!
    God: Holy Ghost, this isn't an episode of Scooby-Doo!
    Holy Ghost: ...And I would have succeeded, were it not for those pesky God and Jesus fellows!

So... yeah.

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