The Marty Stu protagonist who is Light's long-lost brother, having been raised in an orphanage in the "town" of "Whales". He uses the Royal Death Note to kill people whose names and faces he doesn't know. He dies and becomes King of the Shinigami until Sayu deposes him and he gets arrested, but uses the Everything Note to go "back in tim". He schemes to get his hands on the Anti-Life note in order to kill L once and for all, but after he does, he ends up teaming up with L's ghost to kill Night. He tries to reclaim his title of King of the Shinigami from Sayu, but gets swept up to heaven by Blud and L. He comes back and seemingly tricks Light and L into killing each other. Loses his memory in the ending and has children with Samanther. Those children are Dark, Light, and Night, meaning the story is an endless loop. This also means he's actually the young version of Sochiro, his own father.
Tropes associated with Dark:
- Atomic F-Bomb: Quite literally, in chapter 14, he yells F-CK so loud, that a church explodes.
- The Chessmaster - Well, he wants to be.
- Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas - "...Tell... my... mom.... I.... love............................ Her!..."
- Heroic Comedic Sociopath - For a very limited value of heroic.
- I Have Many Names - Du'arq, Du'ark, D'uarq, Du'raq, Da'arq, Da'urq, Duarq, D'aurq, Darq, Da'ueq...
- Improbable Aiming Skills - Would have been able to snipe Near from the top of the "Eyfal Tower", and can kill a million stormtroopers with 100,000 bullets (he misses once, but kills 100 with a single punch).
- Kavorka Man - Everyone wants to sleep with him. Everyone. EVERYONE.
- Kneel Before Zod
- Large Ham - As King of the Shinigami
- Magnificent Bastard- In-Universe, Dark proclaims himself one, even though he has all the qualities a Magnificent Bastard would not.
- Murder Is the Best Solution - Dark doesn't bother with Plans, he just "death notes" all who stand in his way.
- My Nayme Is - "Du'arq" as King of the Shinigami
- Parental Incest - As it turns out, this is justified, due to a strange Stable Time Loop situation, in which Dark becomes Soichiro and his wife Samanther becomes Light's Mom.
- Plot Armor - Lampshaded when it's stated that he's in no danger from the pirate attack in Chapter 15 because he's the hero of the story.
- Story-Breaker Power - The Royal Death Note, which can kill anyone, even people whose face or name you don't know, and the Everything Note, which can do everything. Only Forgot About His Powers and several other countermeasures prevent it from being used to full effect.
- Villain Protagonist - It's stated that he's all but completely evil, but still is the hero of the story.
Dark's brother, who starts out as Kira but quickly gets pushed aside by Dark. Light's best known line is his Oh, Cisco! moment when he suggests a foursome between himself, Dark, Sayu, and Misa. L kills him, then accidentally resurrects him, and later, the two kill each other. Obviously OOC.
Tropes associated with Light:
- Camp Gay:That sounds laaaaaaaaameeeeeee!shrieked light balleting into the room. You need to find a way to make something I need LIKE HAIR GEL"
- The Corruption: Revealed in the end that overuse of the Death Note had corrupted him and turned him into a shinigami. That shingiami being none other than Blud.
- HeelFace Turn: Is seen working with L, more often than not.
- Killed Off for Real: Drowns in his own tears in Chapter 38... despite having already been nuked to death a few chapters earlier without technically being revived... (Well, he was cloned and turned into a dog. But his original body was possessed by Dark and remains in that state for the remainder of the story.)
- Luke, I Am Your Father: He's revealed to be L's father, and thus, Creepy Dude by the end of the story.
- Took a Level in Badass:
- When he joins forces with Day to defeat Khaos, becoming Shadow in the process. Even so, he's still pretty weak compared to the other characters, and eventually Shadow somehow becomes a separate entity from Light.
- He eventually becomes Blud, one of the most powerful characters in the story.
Light, Dark and Sayu's father. He's more foul-mouthed, quick-tempered, and willing to use violence than in the original story.
Tropes associated with Soichiro:
- Ax-Crazy - He questions Mikami while spitting in his face and holding a knife to his neck "like The Joker".
- Cowboy Cop - A complete 180 from his canon portrayal as a by-the-book chief.
- Fake Defector: Helps get Dark back to America and impersonates Watari for him, but tells L that he's on his side.
- Identity Amnesia: He's actually the amnesiac Dark who traveled back in time and became Soichiro.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot - Well, when compared to the rest of the cast.
- Watch the Paint Job - A nuclear bomb goes off in his street. Light's dad is angry that it dented his car.
- What the Hell, Hero? - To L when he kills his wife to test the Death Note.
Sachiko Yagami/Light's Mom
Soichiro's wife and the Yagami siblings' mother. She dies when L uses her to test the Death Note, but gets better with the help of the Life Note. She also falls in love with Dark because according to the author, "She gotted from Dark wat she never got from Soichiro nad his creepy mustache". The author doesn't know her real name, and consistently calls her "Light's Mom". When she appears in the past, she's still called "Light's Mom" even though Light technically hadn't been born yet. The author, noting this, calls her "Light's Past Mom". One can only assume that Light's Mom had very strange parents who really wanted a grandson named "Light".
Tropes associated with Light's Mom:
- Dying Vocal Change: When under the Death Notes influence, she is said to speak in a strange voice that wasnt hers.
- The Unfair Sex - It's totally okay that she's having an affair with her because "she gotted from Dark wat she never got from Soichiro nad his creepy mustache".
- Unnamed Parent - Light's Mom, although it may very well be her actual name, since L kills her by writing it in the Death Note.
Sayu Anime (formerly Yagami)
Light and Dark's younger sister. She is a lesbian and is in love with Misa. When Dark becomes King of the Shinigami, she becomes Queen of the Shinigami and is sent in to stop him. She eventually marries Misa in Massachusetts.
Tropes associated with Sayu:
- Ascended Extra - She gets maybe 5 lines in the anime. In the fic, she's one of the most important characters.
- Gag Boobs - In shinigami form.
- Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today? - "NO I AM LESBEAN REMEMBER!"
- My Nayme Is: "Sa~Y'u" as Queen of the Shinigami.
- Redundant Parody: Making Sayu into a lesbian could be interpreted as an attempt at Suddenly Sexuality...except that Misa was already "her type" in the original anime, so this isn't much of a swerve. That said, the fact that it defines her character in this fic is definitely an example of Flanderization.
- Upgrade Artifact - Uses the Everything Note to "MAKE (HER) FIGHT BETTER" against Dark.
- Twice. The second time she's good enough to starts winning!
Opposite-Sex Clone of Dark, who is apparently made out of Death note pages (which enables her to kill people by getting tattoos), and has the Shinigami eyes and ears, and "will one day sign the song that ends the world" . Has the dubious accomplishment of perhaps being as much as, if not more of, a Mary Sue than Dark. She eventually gets killed by Dark while helping L avenge his death. Then comes back... somehow.
Tropes associated with Night:
- Heroic Suicide: Though, she's kind of forced into it by Dark. In the end she becomes a bomb, in an attempt to kill L. It doesn't quite work, but it does manage to kill Mello who was Jumping on a Grenade to save L.
- Mad Scientist: She's the smartest woman in both England and America, rivaled only by Samanther. note She's also responsible for the creation of several clones, including Twilight Yagami.
- Paper-Thin Disguise - She disguises herself as a naked man. By getting a tattoo that says "IM A GUY".
- Theme Naming - Dark, Light, and now Night. The Yagami family fail at imagination.
A "clone" created from the DNA of Night and Light, but since Day likes Dark better, Day decides that Dark is actually his father (apparently this can work because Light and Dark are twins). Lives in the attic.
A robot clone of Dark. When Dark and his extended clone family are killed, Dusk saves the day because, being a robot, he's immune to the effects of the Secret Death Note. Currently lives in Dark's iPad/Death Note.
Tropes associated with Dusk:
Yet another clone of Dark. Created when the cloning machine went crazy, creating an army of zombie Lights. Dawn has a bit of lion DNA "in there for the stronger". He dresses like James Bond.
Tropes associated with Dawn:
- Hurricane of Puns: Originally wanted to be known as "Darknight", which the author explains is "cos he likes batman". Dark changes his name because Dawn "will bring a NEW DAWN to our crimefiting!" Ugg...
- Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot: He's a Double Shinigami Lion Man with pen fingers, who wears a suit with two robot ties that can be combined to make a sword, and shoes with fish tanks in the heels.
The final clone of Dark, created with Vampire DNA. Only exists because reviwers suggested it to the author.
Tropes assocaited with Twilight:
- Our Vampires Are Different: Created by mixing Vampire DNA with Dark's. Also, never drinks blood and can cope in sunlight just fine.
Dark's Shinigami. Has apparently become the King of the Shinigami and likes eating blood bananas, which are poisonous to anyone other than the King. Has a habit of talking in all caps, and switching sides at a drop of a hat, and even more quickly revealing that those switches were fake. He is killed by Dark upon his ascension to King of the Shinigami, but gets better.
Tropes associated with Blud:
- Big Bad: He ends up being the final villain.
- Big Eater: He sure loves his blood bananas!
- The Chessmaster: The finale reveals that he planned the events leading up to the start of the series.
- Chronic Backstabbing Disorder: Betrays Dark by bringing L back to life, betrays L by helping Dark get a Royal Death Note in prison, betrays Dark yet again by trying to kill him in revenge for killing him, and then betrays Mello, claiming to have been on Dark's side all along. He then betrays Dark yet again, demanding that he step aside as King of the Shinigami.
- Happily Married: When he explains how he obtained the Royal Death Note (by killing the King of the Shinigami), he claims he gets a wife and a palace. It takes until near the end of the story to discover the identity of the wife - TIOSEAFJ. Alas, their marriage would seem to consist primarily of 'sexing'. Yet their marriage ends after Blud decides to murder everyone...because he can, and despite TIOSEAFJ's willing assistance, murders her. She reveals she cheated on him with Dark, however, hinting their marriage wasn't quite as good as it seemed.
- HeelFace Revolving Door: He twice seems to betray Dark, then reveals those betrayals were fake seconds later.
- Home Field Advantage: Inverted. He is actually considerably weaker in the Shinigami world, albeit for wholly circumstantial reasons— he can't simply destroy it like he did the universe because it's his own home, plus the abundance of blood banana plants distracts him.
- Karma Houdini: Despite all of his numerous crimes (including destroying the cosmos with a black hole), Blud goes to Heaven and is happy after Dark finally kills him for the last time.
- Kick the Dog: He kills his shinigami girlfriend TIOSEAFJ by poisoning her right before he goes to destroy the rest of the world.
- Large Ham
- Meaningful Name: His name is Blud and he loves blood.
- No Indoor Voice
- Omnicidal Maniac: By the end, he destroys everything and everyone in the universe (save Dark and Samanther)... Simply because he can.
- Overlord Jr.: He's the son of the King of the Shinigami, but was abandoned as a child and raised by a time-traveling Watari.
- Person of Mass Destruction: He destroys the Earth (and eventually the universe) by spitting at it.
- Species Surname
- Taking You with Me: Once he realizes that Dark has beaten him, he uses a final attack to give Dark Laser-Guided Amnesia, and implant a bomb in his brain, so should he ever remember his true identity it will explode and kill him.
- Unexplained Recovery: And like most cases, the author doesn't even bother to explain why he came back from the dead.
- Was Once a Man: He's revealed to be Light, who had been corrupted into a Shinigami from the Death Note's power. He then travels back in time to meet Watari (presumably, as a baby) thus starting the chain of events that begins the series. However, Light himself never learns this.
- You Kill It, You Bought It: How he became King of the Shinigami and how Dark later took it from him.
Light's Shinigami. Not too OOC in this, but that's mainly because Blud pushes him aside. Only pops up to be denigrated by Blud. Both times his name was spelled "Ruyk".
Tropes associated with Ruyk:
- Always Someone Better: Blud. Even the cake shaped like him is inferior to the one shaped like Blud.
- Butt-Monkey: Though, not to the extent of Near. He is last seen (though, chronologically it's his first appearance) being choked by Blud, who steals his Death Note, and combines it with the Ancient Death Note thus becoming King of the Shinigami.
- Demoted to Extra: Isn't it sad, Shinigami?
- Functional Addict: The ending reveals that he was addicted to apple flavored heroin.
Shakespeare's time-travelling Shinigami, and a female. Her name comes from the author bashing keys on the keyboard, but deciding what came out sounded cool. Needless to say, her name is spelled wrong constantly. She appears in the present, under orders from 'Jimmy' Shakespeare, to take C Kira into the past, only for him to wind up captured by Dark (pretending to be L) and Watari. Later, she seems to have become Blud's wife. The fanart of her seems to indicate she looks like Sakura Haruno wearing a 'time' suit with wings.
Tropes associated with TIOSEAFJ:
- Kick the Dog: Her death - poisoned by Blud, via a syringe filled with blood bananas.
- Les Yay: After Ryuk loses a bet with Blud, he is turned into a chick called Byut and forced to sex with TIOSEAFJ. However, this turns out to be a bad idea due to Byut being so ugly TIOSEAFJ had to put a paper bag over her head.
- Ms. Fanservice: Her last appearance has her attempt to 'sex' with Blud by wearing panties and a sexy nurse outfit, and waving the needle around in a 'senseul style'. Also, she uses a Sex Note to give herself bigger 'chests' and blonde hair.
- Of Corsets Sexy: Seems to be wearing one whilst on Planet Blud.
- Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe: "Who the fucketh art thou?", and that's just her first line.
- Your Cheating Heart: She reveals to Blud that she prefers Dark to him for 'sexing'. This prompts Blud to destroy Planet Blud and destroy the world...again.
Samanther's Shinigami, who is a talking horse with the power of magnets on his shoes.
Tropes associated with Magnetario:
- Butt-Monkey: Due to having even less screentime than Ryuk, he gets this less. Yet soon after he appears, he's stuck to the fridge and never appears again, apart from his 'antlers' poking Misa whilst she is sexing with Cyber Takada.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: Never seen again after he's stuck to the fridge.
The world's greatest detective. Is somehow "Japanish" in this version despite his actual ethnicity being considerably more complicated in the source material. L is physically stronger then his canon counter being able to punch "wholes" in walls. He becomes Emperor of Japan when Dark takes over the world. Dies twice after Dark writes his name in the Death Note, but comes back with God's Ghost Note to avenge his own death. He gets killed again by Light after killing him and accidentally resurrecting him. According to other fics in the series, he is not the same guy as Lind L Taylor.
Tropes associated with L:
- Big Eater: The character's affection for sweets is amplified in this story. He keeps big piles of candy in his office.
- Dance Battler: Uses his "brazil dancing from the beyond birthday book" against Night.
- Did You Just Frighten Cthulhu? - Threatens God with a knife while negotiating his resurrection.
- The Dog Was the Mastermind: In the end it's revealed that he is responsible for the events that lead to the start of the series. His goal was apparently to create some sort of detective version of Outer Heaven, by creating a world where crime and Kiras would always exist, and thus, the world would always need detectives. Unfortunately, his plans are ruined when Ryuk gives Light his own Death Note. Of course, he was actually being used by Blud all along.
- Extreme Omnivore: His devouring a TV remote in Chapter 23 is just one example.
- Future Loser: He's actual a loser in the future to begin with. When he meets a time-traveling Watari that's when he first begins to pull himself together before traveling back and time and becoming the L of the main story.
- Honey Trap - Subverted; L knows he's being honey trapped by Night, so he gives her a false name.
- He serves as a honey trap for Night in chapter 16.
- Ocular Gushers - Cries hard enough to put out a small fire after getting punched by Night.
- One-Winged Angel - Transforms into some kind of Fire-Mushroom-Demon-Sugar Monster during his final fight with Dark. He explains that he is able to do this due to having made a deal with the Shinigami Devil (who is eviler than the normal Devil) to gain evil powers.
- We Will Meet Again - "I'LL GET YOU DARK YAGAMI IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!!"
- With Catlike Tread - Tries to stealthily ambush Mikami by jumping in a broken window screaming.
Watari / Atari
L's assistant and suggested at one point to be his grandfather. Thought to have been killed early on but comes back due to CPR. Often likes shouting with gratuitous British slang. Often would like some Brain Bleach. During Dark's reign of the world, he becomes Queen of England and Scotland.
- Abusive Parents: The Epilogue explains that his cruel adoptive mother was none other than the Queen of England.
- Badass Mustache
- Charles Atlas Superpower: He makes numerous displays of superhuman strength, such as surviving being hit by a tank fired from Soichiro's police gun.
- Evil Brit:and also watari played a part [in Soichiro killing Dark] because he was evil and twisty and british and all that jazz.
- No Indoor Voice: Not initially, but he picks up this trope soon enough. A good example occurs while investigating the Yagami house in Chapter 23:"HELL AND CARNATION!" watari screeched like a vampire bat. "THE SODDING NIGHT LASS JUST SODDING FORGOT HER FINGERS!"
- Older Than They Look: This is revealed in Part Two of the Epilogue. Watari has an artifact called the "THE SORCERORS STONE" which grants him immortality, which explains how he appears in the present day despite him being a young man during "ancient times" in England.
- Retired Outlaw: He was once Ancient Kira who rid the world of all evil before giving it up to spend his time plotting to create his successor. Unfortunately, L prevents his plans from coming to fruition.
- She Is the King: Inverted, as mentioned above, he becomes the Queen of England and Scotland at one point.
- Spot of Tea: Loves it so much that he offers tea and crumpets to his opponent during the final battle.
- Unfortunate Names: His full name is Watari Bumblesnoot The Third.
He also works to capture Kira, but ends up getting abducted by Dark and used to test out the Anti-Life Note. Near is killed twice in the fanfiction. First he's killed by Dark when Dark stabs him with a knife because Dark needs needs Near "for a sacrifis. And that sacrifis will kill L for ones and all.!" It turns out Near is alive and imprisoned by Dark. Dark uses Near's blood to create an Anti-Life Note, because according to Dark the "blood of a verging" to create the Anti Life Note. Dark then tests out the Anti-Life Note on Near and it's stated that he's Killed Off for Real. However, in the next chapter, Near is alive and well.
Tropes associated with Near:
- Creepy Child - Even more than in the original. He has a Nerf gun that shoots real bullets!
- Evil Twin: The ending reveals that the Near of the story is actually child Watari who had been stolen from the past, and that the real Near is an elderly clone of Watari who took his place at L's command.
- Improbable Aiming Skills - Can shoot Dark's bullets out of the air, and shoot the scope off his sniper rifle.
- Shoot the Bullet: To Dark.
- They Killed Kenny Again
- Unexplained Recovery - Near bizarrely flip-flops between dead or alive at the drop of a hat in this story.
- Virgin Sacrifice: To create the Anti-Life Note, of course.
Dark kills him for his clothes early on, but he survives with the help of Blud's Life Note. He returns when Blud seeks vengeance on Dark... until Dark double-crosses and kills him again.
- Back from the Dead: Blud writes him back to life with the Life Note, but...evidently dies off-screen sometime after, because he's a ghost by his next appearance.
- Dying Declaration of Love: To L.
- Heroic Sacrifice: To save L.
- Put on a Bus: Appears early on briefly, then briefly again later, then vanishes abruptly in the middle of the scene when Dark kills Near for "for a sacrifis. And that sacrifis will kill L for ones and all.!" Mello then returns (as a ghost, for some reason) after "Yotsuba" uses a Life Note on Night accidentally! Later, Mello is alive and tries to go to the 'future future' (where there is a museum with lasers and a robot), where he gets grenades and a book titled 'How Mello Killed Dark Yagami'. However, Khaos shoves a sleeping pill down his nose and takes control of his body, for his plan to buy the entire world in the past. Once Dark uses his Reset Note to cut the rope, Mello vanishes, until he becomes part of L's team. Then he performs a Heroic Sacrifice by jumping on a bomb which is actually Night, who was turned into a bomb by Dark.
- Sissy Villain
Mello's friend. In this fanfiction, Matt tries to avenge Mello, but comes face to face with "Yotsuba" and causes the car to crash. Yotsuba dies and Matt is able to steal the Death Note. However, Dark is able to use the Royal Death Note and kill people in the past, and makes it so Matt dies in the car crash instead of Yotsuba. Matt is killed in an explosion that is caused when Yotsuba crashes the car. Matt is stated to have been reduced to bits.
- Ludicrous Gibs: All that remains of him.
- Revenge: His driving motivation
- Unexplained Recovery: Somehow appears alive and captured by Creepy Dude, who wants Matt's Secret Death Note. However, Matt threw this notebook into a volcano, and ends up sacrificed to the volcano god in exchange for the Secret Death Note.
Hal/le Q. Lidner/Linder
Apparently a man in this version and L's apprentice. Teleports to Dark's house with the Teleport Note and tries to kill him, but ends up killing Light instead (he gets better).
- Put on a Bus: Did not reappear until the last battle between L's team and the Yagami team, where he had somehow become Takada's husband and turned her into 'Cyber Takada'. During said fight, he defeats Twilight by giving him a Blood Banana Smoothie - which is poisonous to anyone who isn't Blud. (Despite Twilight being 50% Dark and 50% Blud.) He's defeated once and for all via Light's Mom's brownie bunny gun, which turns people into bunnies.
Another lesbian in this version, and initially disguised as Naomi Misora. She gets killed by Light while having sex with Desk Lady. Later, she's recreated by her husband Hal Q Lidner as a cyborg, complete with robot gun arms and bulletproof 'chests' called Cyber Takada.
Mentioned throughout the story, and appears in the epilogue as a boy who is sad because it was never his birthday. He attempts to hit on Samanther during Spin The Bottle, prompting Dark to hit him. In 'Pain Note: The Resserekshun of Raye Penber', Naomi and L decide to arrest him. During the fight, Naomi shoots his neck, kills him, but feels sad for him and gets naked and touches him. L calls her a necrophiliac.
The author apparently has never read the book, of course.
Light's girlfriend, but that's as far as the resemblance goes. She has sex with Sayu, and is willing to join in a threesome with her and Light.
- Suddenly Sexuality - Despite initially being in love with Light and having sex with Sayu only to keep her from mentioning her plans with Light, eventually goes steady with her and they later marry. At the very end, she reveals her true love was L, and kisses the air out of Sayu and kills her.
Creepy Dude/Creepy Chick
Secret father of L and Khaos, son of Watari, and short-lived villain. He got a Secret Death Note from a volcano god by sacrificing Matt. He then murdered L, whilst fooling everyone with his disguise as 'Creepy Chick', but was eventually discovered and defeated. Works at a burger & ice cream shop. The author never gives him a name, although as his son K's full name is 'Khaos Watari Junior', it may be Khaos Watari.
Tropes associated with Creepy Dude:
- Canada, Eh?: He pretends to be from "Canader" in order to convince everyone that his Paper-Thin Disguise is genuine. Dark is the only one who doesn't fall for it.
- Creepy Crossdresser: Pulls off a perfect female disguise (which was completely unnecessary because nobody knew who he was) by using a soccer ball as fake breasts. At one point, the soccer ball falls out, but he puts it back in her top and no one seems to notice.
- Easy Sex Change: He's turned into an actual woman in his final appearances. Apparently, he always wanted to know what being a lady felt like, so he's not too bothered.
- HeelFace Door-Slam: After being killed by Khaos, and being brought back as a woman, he briefly helps the heroes identify Khaos. Night rewards him by shooting him in the face with a crossbow. However, it's revealed Night only pretended to kill him so she could hide her under her bed and sex him.
- Suspiciously Specific Denial: Most of what he says prior to his true identity being revealed.
- What Happened to the Mouse?: Completely vanished from the story after Dark used a 'Reset Note' to stop Khaos.
The secret eviler twin of L. Works in a secret lab called "the Khaos Krib" where he eats Special K served to him by his robot mom, Kaley. He managed to defeat Dark and his numerous clones briefly, but unfortunately was defeated by the robot clone, Dusk. Uses a Computer Note which can kill people faster than a Life Note can bring them back. At some point sexed the girl from the bus.
Tropes associated with Khaos:
- Charles Atlas Superpower: Like most of the characters.He ripped apart his clothes and he was all ripped and his blood had been replaced by lightning so it zapped and buzzed under his skin like a xmas tree! He did some rips and they were so big that a mountain exploded.
- Demonic Possession: One of his main abilities.
- Evil Twin: Of L.
- Ho Yay: Whilst possessing Light and Mello, he makes them 'sex'.
- Mind Manipulation: Is somehow capable of taking control of people by tying them up with rope while inside their dreams.
- Ray Gun: A main weapon of his. Used to kill both Watari and later Shakespear.
- Ret-Gone: Abruptly disappears from the story after killing Shakespeare; the author apparently thought he was too strong to be defeated, and proceeded to backtrack to before he "won" in the next chapter.
- Take Over the World: His ultimate goal is to travel back in time and purchase the entire planet, thus, becoming the world ruler by default. Except later it's revealed his plan was to kill Shakespeare and take over England before the 'decoration of Independents', thus ruling the entire world.
William Shakespeare / Jimmy Shakespeer
Was the king of England at some point in the history of whatever bizarre universe this fic takes place in. Apparently murdered Romeo and Juliet. Also had a Death Note and a Shinigami named TIOSEAFJ.
Tropes associated with Shakespeer:
Stated to be Kira by Takada, L and Soichiro go to his house and try to arrest him. Soichiro shoots Mikami and "kills him in the leg", which is later stated to be a broken leg. Mikami is arrested when L uses "stealth" and jumps out of the helicopter that he and Soichiro were in, while screaming. Soichiro then proceeds to interogate Mikami by holding a knife to his neck "like the joker". Mikami is Killed Mid-Sentence by Light when Mikami is about to tell L and Soichiro that Light is Kira. In chapter 14 Mikami is shown to be alive and is referred to as " that x-kira dude no ones heard of". Later, he mysteriously seems to be part of the group trying to find Yotsuba as he climbs on top of the roof (of a helicopter!!!) and fires at a guy that looks slimy. Then he vanishes for good.
Tropes associated with Mikami:
- Ax-Crazy Averted to the point that Soichiro is more Ax-Crazy than Mikami.
- Demoted to Extra
- Killed Mid-Sentence
- Unexplained Recovery: In chapter 14.
Kyosuke Higuchi / Yotsuba
He owns a Death Note after stealing one from Matt. He dies from radiation poisoning, but is brought back to life with the Life Note and tries and fails to assassinate Dark for L. Not to be confused with the other Yotsuba. Possibly supposed to be Higuchi, but since the author is a moron we may never know.
- Accidental Misnaming: Known only as Yotsuba.
- Alien Among Us: He's actually from another planet. We learn this in the final epilogue. He came to Earth because he was lonely and wanted a dog. This, however, was part of L's plan to make evil come back to Earth after Ancient Kira killed all evil people in the past with his Death Note; Yotsuba's planet has evil on it, and when he came to Earth on a comet from his homeworld, he brought evil with him. Or something.
- The Farmer and the Viper/Ungrateful Bastard: Attacks Dark after being revived.
- Nice Job Fixing It, Villain!: Whether he's a villain, or actually fixing anything is unclear, but either way he's responsible for Night's accidental revival.
- Pet the Dog: His goal reason for coming to Earth in the first place was to get a pet dog!
- Put on a Bus: Appears briefly later on to accidentally revive Night with his Life Note.
Naomi MisoraShe dumped Ray for having too small of a "man thingy," and is going out with Dark despite being in love with Night Yagami. Is not at all concerned about Dark being a Kira, and according to the author, is " a bit dum".
In 'Pain Note: The Ressurekshun of Ray Penber', she and Ray go to Japan so he can stop Kira. After Light kills him (but not before he can find the Pain Note, which she later uses to put half of Japan in pain), Blud the Shinigami appears before her, and offers to revive Ray if she sexes with him. She does so, and Ray is revived. Yet later, she discovers she's carrying Blud's baby. Ray gets angry for a few seconds, then reveals he has the power to see the 'futre'. And then the story meanders pointlessly from there.
Tropes associated with Naomi:
- Gratuitous French: During her introduction to Dark, she not only alternates between English and French in the same sentence, but even slips into Gratuitous Spanish once.
- Rule of Cool: Apparently the reason why the author changed her nationality to British.
Yuri/The girl from the bus
Joins in on a "sevensome" with Light, Sayu, Dark, Misa, and Sachiko but is angry after being left out and kills Dark. It turns out she is working for L, but no one knows it, not even L. Apparently, she was one of Light's ex-girlfriends.
Tropes associated with the girl from the bus:
- Ascended Extra: In canon, her appearance lasts for two chapters and a single episode. Here, she's a major character capable of killing the protagonist. Yet not even once is her actual name given, unless you count the epilogue's reveal that she is Samanther, which also makes her Light's Mom. In other words, in the 'sevensome', she had sex with HERSELF and her future children. As well as her future son's girlfriend.
- Bullet Time: When she fires her guns, "everything went all matrixy"
- Dual Wielding: Can wield five pistols at once.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!: Her killing Dark enables him to become King of the Shinigami, and he's thankful to her for it.
- Yandere: Kills Dark after she is left out of the group hug.
The desk lady
The desk lady works at a desk in the police station. The author has no idea what her name is, so just calls her "the desk lady". Frequently does her job naked as bait for criminals. Sexes a lot.
Tropes associated with the desk lady:
- Ms. Fanservice: Seems to be her actual job at the police station per Chapter 27:The desk lady opened the door sexily. She was naked because then criminals came to see her naked and then they got arrested.
Seems somewhat cowardly in this version, and prone to wetting his pants. He helps Sayu fight off Dark, but dies from a fall while dancing to celebrate his victory.
- Abnormal Ammo
- BFG: Apparently shoots police cars at its highest setting.
- Gratuitous Spanish: Sayu calls him "San Matsuda" in this version (he thinks she's calling him "Saint Matsuda" in Japanese) instead of "Matsuda-san" (roughly equivalent to "Mr. Matsuda")
C and S
Two of the children from Watari House whom L recruits to arrest (by which he means kill) the Yagami family. Their real names are "Cool Dude" and "Samanther", though in S' case S is also short for smart and sexy. Supposedly the smartest two people at the orphanage.
Tropes associated with these two:
- Adults Are Useless: Hence why L enlists 2 children.
- British English: The girls' name is "Samanther".
- Healing Shiv: C can apparently revive dead animals by punching them with his "fists of holy".
- Informed Ability: These two apparently just writ stuff when L shows up (including stuff they 'writ' in their heads...), but we see no proof.
- Only Known by Their Nickname
- Shout-Out: To Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
- Trouser Space: C pulls "transformer guns" out of his pants.
- Writers Cannot Do Math: Samanther apparently did 3 divisions in her head. Exactly what D'ark means by this is not clear.
Dark's wife. She has massively huge "bouncing bouncers". The author always misspells "Samantha" so her name is "Samanther". Becomes Light's Mom in the ending.
Tropes associated with Samanther:
- First Girl Wins: Since she grew up at the same orphanage as Dark, she would have been his first love interest.
- Les Yay: Averted. She's the only female heterosexual character, apart from possibly Light's Mom. Which turns out to be an older version of Samanther anyway...
- Ms. Fanservice: More than any other character, and that's saying something
- Overnight Age-Up: Presumably. She's introduced as a child, but later chapters indicate that she has massive breasts, is capable of lactating, and gives birth to 3 children. If this isn't the case, that would at the very least make Dark a pedophile. Though, this seems to be what happened given the fact that the ending reveals she's old enough to be Light's mom.
- The Smart Girl: Though, it comes off as an Informed Attribute. She can apparently do divisions in her head, and write the entire Harry Potter series in her diary from memory.