For characters introduced in Kindergarten 2, go here.
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Students
You
This is you, as a kindergartner. Complete assignments, accumulate wealth and unlock special items as you solve the mystery that dwells beneath the school.
- Apocalypse Maiden: You can (accidentally) become a kid variant in the Talisman Ending.
- Dying Declaration of Hate: You give one to Miss Applegate should she poison your lunch.
- He Knows Too Much: It is possible for you and Lily to be killed after stumbling upon something you really shouldn't see.
- Hammerspace: Your character has no real limit to what they can fit in their pockets. This is exaggerated strongly in the sequel, where you can now store things like a jackhammer, chainsaw, shovel and even a leg in your inventory.
- Henpecked Husband: Doable if you play house with Cindy, possibly going through the entire scene just answering "yes dear". It's highly recommended not to break the mold, lest you face the consequences.
- Laser-Guided Karma: If you're careless in ratting a student out, this can happen to you. If Cindy is present when you present a dead dog in Nugget's cave to Ms. Applegate, she will be enraged thinking you've killed hers and will kill you. And then Ms. Applegate will give her a gold star for getting rid of you.
- Mike Nelson, Destroyer of Worlds: Collecting all of the Monstermon cards will trigger the Apocalypse with you and Nugget as the sole survivors. This is true in the second game too.
- No Name Given: Everyone refers to you as "kid", even the other kids.
- Only Friend: The player be this to Nugget in Billy's stead by finishing his route in the first game.
- Playable Character: This is the character you are controlling.
- Teacher's Pet: You may opt to play as one in the first game, helping the teacher eliminate the rest of the students while earning gold stars and eventually, a Lunch Pass in the process.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: If you microwave a cat in the teacher's lounge, it results in you deciding to end the school day early... or to be more specific, your avatar decides to regardless of how you feel because even he felt that your decision was in poor taste.
Cindy
The pretty girl in school. If you agree to put gum in Lily's hair, she will let you play with her as her boyfriend.
- Alpha Bitch: She's the most domineering and mean-spirited of the girls in both games.
- Dumb Blonde: She has blonde hair and is clearly not very bright, considering she will eat anything if told that it is vegan. In some cases, she can even prove to be Too Dumb to Live (see below).
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: As bad as she is, she seems to genuinely care for her dog, Biscuit. Finding out what happened to him triggers a Roaring Rampage of Revenge (though sometimes misdirected if you play your cards wrong).
- The Fake Cutie: Describes herself as the sweetest girl in school, though nobody is fooled by her ruse.
- Girlish Pigtails: Has a pair of them tied to the sides.
- Girly Bruiser: For a cowardly girl who manipulates people into doing her dirty work, she can become a Combat Pragmatist if she gets too mad.
- Gold Digger: At least if her calling Felix a "walking gold mine" after the player sets him up with her in Flowers for Diana is any indication.
- Hate Sink: She's a bullying, controlling, bratty little snot and easily the most despicable character in the cast. It's downright cathartic to watch her get blood dumped on her, if you do it to her instead of Lily, that is.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Her accusation of rape will only lead to her "expulsion" if you can provide proof that she's lying.
- Jerkass: Very much established when you first talk to her, where she offers a relationship with you for putting gum on Lily's hair.
- Kids Are Cruel: She asks you to put gum in Lily's hair, and later asks you to pour a bucket of blood on her. She also calls rape on you if you dare insult her at the start of the day.
- Killed Offscreen: When she gets run over by a car after you dump her with blood, you never see her die. The only part of her you can see is her shoe.
- Lack of Empathy: She shows not an ounce of guilt even after she drives Lily to suicide.
- Look Both Ways: If you dump blood on her instead of Lily, she runs into the street and gets hit by a car.
- Man Bites Man: If she finds out that the Janitor killed her dog, she will bite his ear off before tearing out his entire head.
- Spoiled Brat: Implied. We never see or learn anything about her parents, but her outfit in Kindergarten 2 is called the "Spoiled Pink Dress", and it would certainly explain her demanding and arrogant behaviour.
- Too Dumb to Live:
- In her route in the first game, if blood is poured on her instead of Lily, she will run out into the street screaming (as the kindergarten has no fence) and get hit by a car.
- In Ted's route in the second game, she can be convinced to stick a fork into an electrical outlet because she doesn't know what would happen and you simply tell her that "it would cause a distraction" in exchange for a flower. It does indeed cause a distraction, and a shocking one at that.
- Woman Scorned: Only that with her ex gone, she is targeting his sister.
Jerome
The cool kid in school. Son of the principal, he initially refuses to talk to anyone not cool enough, but if you offer him a yo-yo, he will request you to help him take back his laser-pointer confiscated by the janitor.
- Avenging the Villain: In the second game, he wants revenge on Lily for his father's death. And he'll just as willingly kill you if you reveal your role in what happened. However, when he actually confronts Lily directly, she helps him understand what kind of person his father was, convincing him to give up his revenge.
- Fascinating Eyebrow: In the first game, his sprite is constantly making this expression. He no longer has it in the second game due to his grief over his dad's death leaving him crying constantly unless you give him Cindy's tissue, then he'll return to making his original expression.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Not a nice guy when you first meet him, but go to the absolute lengths to help him and he'll consider you cool. Even if you fail to get his laser pointer back when (for all he knows) you did all you could, he doesn't hold it against you and even lets you keep the principal's pass.
- Token Minority: Is the only kindergartner who is black.
- You Killed My Father: In the second game, he's furious with Lily for being involved in his dad's death, and tries to kill her with one of his father's bombs. Fortunately, she and the protagonist manage to make him see reason before he goes through with it.
Buggs
The bully in school. If you bring in too much cash, he will demand half the amount from you. But if you refuse to team up with the teacher to get rid of him when offered, he will grow respect of you and will request you to help get rid of the teacher before she gets rid of them.
- Alcoholic Parent: His father was implied to be one as he reminisces his mother using a breath analyzer on him, should you bring that item to him at recess.
- Barbaric Bully: In the first game, he will steal half of your money if you come to school with more than 3 dollars as well as beat you up depending on your route. He also flings slop at Nugget at lunchtime.
- Disappeared Dad: His father left him. You can exploit this to make him fight you, or find him an alcohol-related memento at his most vulnerable moment to cheer him up and get a Monstermon card for it.
- Fat Bastard: He's as thick as he's mean.
- Freudian Excuse: Became a bully to cope with his father leaving him.
- Kids Are Cruel: He robs you of your money if you have more than three dollars, and regularly throws slop at Nugget. He also beats you to death if you piss him off enough.
- Pet the Dog: Succeed in his first game's route and he lets you keep Applegate's phone out of respect.
- Properly Paranoid: Tells you about how scared he is about getting expelled in his route. Considering that expulsion usually involves a bullet to the head, he's pretty much got every right to be.
- Took a Level in Kindness: In the second game. He's still a bully and a troublemaker but he generally acts nicer to the protagonist than he did in the first game.
- Villain Decay: While he's not a villain, in the second game, he's become pretty much harmless due to Penny confiscating his knife.
- Wouldn't Hit a Girl: When Carla calls him fat in "Opposites Attract", he says that he would push her down the stairs for it if she wasn't a girl. It apparently only applies directly though, because he has no problem using a magnet to decapitate Penny in the same mission.
Nugget
The weird kid in school, who loves chicken nuggets, digging holes, and putting nuggets in said holes. He has no friends aside from the former student Billy, but if you offer him a flower, he will start the Five Nuggets of Friendship quest with you.
- Ambidextrous Sprite: If he enters morning time minus an arm in the second game, the side it's missing from will flip depending on which way he's facing.
- An Arm and a Leg: Nugget chews off his own arm in Kindergarten 2 after getting trapped beneath the sewer. If what he says is any indication though, he didn't actually need to do it. He just thought doing so was necessary.
- Appendage Assimilation: You supply him with Stevie's arm in Cain's Not Able in order to dig a hole.
- Astonishingly Appropriate Appearance: His odd lumpy hairstyle combined with the rectangular head shared by all kindergartners in the game does make him somewhat resemble a chicken nugget.
- Ax-Crazy: Kindergarten 2's Talisman ending, holy shit...
- Berserk Button: If you throw something into his Nugget Cave without his consent, he will then throw you down into the cave.
- Beware the Silly Ones: He's just a harmless little mole-creature... until he blackmails his friends into poisoning someone's food. He's not above making someone suffer a little fall either. And lying to him about a nugget factory is a good way to send him on a Roaring Rampage of Revenge when he finds out you lied.
- Better to Die than Be Killed: He would rather throw himself into Nugget Cave than let the teacher do it.
- Butt-Monkey: Is often ridiculed by other characters.
- Cloudcuckoolander: While he is more than he first seems, he still isn't completely there. He has a hobby of digging holes, and a "fidgety spinny" is enough to distract him from a missing arm.
- Cloudcuckoolanguage: He speaks in the third person, calls characters by descriptive nicknames (like "the pretty Lily" for Lily or "the fancy rich boy" for Felix), and has a tendency of phrasing things pretty strangely overall, even when he's being snarky:Protagonist: You say "Nugget" a lot.
Nugget: Keen observation. Has Nugget's potential friend also noticed the green of the grass and the blue of the sky? - Creepy Child: He barely had friends as they had to go through Five Nuggets worth of trails to forge a friendship with him. He also tends to have harmful behavior such as digging a hole so deep in the sandbox, children have died falling into the hole. And then there's the Monstermon Card endings...
- Fish Eyes: He has them to emphasise his weirdness.
- Hammerspace: The dozens of nuggets that spill out of his pockets to cushion the hole to the Nugget Cave seem evident of this.
- Head Desk: Upon being handed a whole box of nuggets, he will become upset because they are frozen and starts banging his head against a wall. He will continue to do this until the nuggets are microwaved or he dies of the constant head banging.
- Made of Iron: Ran back home like usual despite spending Tuesday bleeding out across the school. He will also be fine despite being stabbed in the head, when one stab is enough to kill the teacher. He can also take being struck by a ball thrown hard enough to lob your head off.Nugget: Nugget is quite durable. Nugget will survive.
- No-Sell: Somehow, he is unfazed by getting stabbed in the head.
- Series Mascot: Due to his popularity, he's the one on all the Kindergarten merchandise.
- Smarter Than You Look: Despite looking loony, he can write something that's reasonably readable, and he can create poison to spike his nuggets with as well as control its potency.
- Strange Minds Think Alike: When given Agnes' cat, he gives it the same name she gave it: Tenders.
- Third-Person Person: Speaks this way, unless he has taken an anti-trauma pill which makes him talk normally.
- Throw the Dog a Bone: Has a lot of misfortune befall him throughout the first two games, which makes the kiss on the cheek from Lily that he gets during the Golden Ending of 2 all the sweeter.
- Trademark Favourite Food: As his name suggests, chicken nuggets. In fact, that might be how he got his name.
- Tunnel King: He likes digging extremely deep holes he calls Nugget Caves and has a knack for doing so extremely quickly. Both Ms. Applegate and Felix call him a "mole creature" at separate occasions.
Monty
His appearance in the first game. Click here to see his appearance in Kindergarten 2.
The smarty-pants in school. He buys and sells things in school, including a copy of a key to the principal's office, as long you provide its mold as a reference.
- Abhorrent Admirer: Towards Carla. He admires how shrewd and well connected she is. Unfortunately for him, she considers him a gross dweeb and an interloper on her territory. In Things That Go Boom, he agrees to disarm a bomb in exchange for her going on a date with him.
- Achilles' Heel: His wheelchair is deluxe and equipped with a full laser cannon, yet removing a single screw causes the entire thing to fall apart.
- Disabled Snarker: Confined to a wheelchair in the second game, and also noticeably more sarcastic.
- Gadgeteer Genius: He is, in his own words, "pretty handy with gadgets". For proof, look no further than the laser cannon in his wheelchair, which he knows how to modify and most likely put in himself to begin with.
- Genius Cripple: He's stuck in a wheelchair in the second game, and the fact that he no longer sells things beyond the first part of the day means that his intelligence is more emphasised than in the first one. He can build a laser cannon into his wheelchair, synthesise the pills Ms. Applegate is addicted to, disarm a bomb, and of course read.
- High-School Hustler: A kindergarten version as he's the only one to come to for buying and selling things as well as capable of doing certain actions when doing a quest for a fee such as reading notes. Less so in Kindergarten 2. While he still buys and sells things, his services are more limited as he has not yet familiarized himself with the new schoolnote , with that role being taken over by Carla. In addition, he stops selling things after the morning period because with Penny watching everything like a hawk, he can't get his inventory out of his locker (though he can still buy items from you). In The Hitman's Potty Guard, Carla asks you to dismantle his wheelchair as a warning that she has already claimed the role of hustler in this kindergarten.
- Not Quite Dead: When calling him out to the janitor for correcting his spelling of "biscuit", he manages to survive the janitor's beating when it will always kill you instantly. He remains twitching on the floor, with the janitor estimating that he'll recover in a year or two. Kindergarten 2 has this beating canon and has Monty now relegated to being in a wheelchair as a result of the beating.
- Redhead In Green: Has ginger hair and wears a green jacket.
- Smart People Wear Glasses: Wears specs, and he's a Gadgeteer Genius and one of the few kids in the first game who can read. If you set the janitor on him, you can get your hands on them and give them to the lunch lady so she'll let you out of the cafeteria.
- Super Wheelchair: With a built-in laser cannon, no less.
Lily
The second girl in school. She is worried about her missing brother Billy. If you bring a combination of special item, you may be able to help her get to the bottom of this.
- Despair Event Horizon: Gives up on living after suffering Cindy's pranks too many times.
- Driven to Suicide: Help Cindy pour blood over Lily, and it'll be the final straw that broken the camel's back as she jumps into Nugget's hole.
- Eaten Alive: In Monty's route in the second game, she's savaged and eaten by one of the principal's monsters.
- Eyes Always Averted: Her sprite's eyes are always turned away from wherever she's facing, possibly to indicate her shy personality.
- In the Hood: Wears a hoodie in the second game when she's snooping around.
- Kid Detective: In the second game, she and Billy are actively staking out the new school for secrets, and her unlockable outfit is referred to as the Sleuth's Dress.
- Killed Offscreen: You won't be seeing her later in the day if she gets sent to the Principal.
- Shrinking Violet: Shy, depressed, insecure, and often the target of being picked on by Cindy.
- Snooping Little Kid: Invoked; she's trying to figure out the circumstances behind her brother's disappearance. In the second game she's more of a Kid Detective, taking a more explicit role in investigating things.
Billy (SPOILERS!)
The missing kid who was apparently expelled from school. His sister, Lily, has not seen him ever since.
- The Ghost: Before you start a day dedicated to helping Lily, he's presented as a mystery former student.
- He Knows Too Much: The real reason behind Billy's disappearance - he walked in on the janitor disposing of a monster corpse, and was subsequently chosen to be the headmaster's first human guinea pig.
- The Illegible: Downplayed in that it can be read, but upon reading the note Billy left behind for Nugget, Monty notes that his handwriting is atrocious. It takes him until lunch to decipher the code to the hatch in the principal's office.
- Kid Detective: Takes on this role in the second game, along with Lily.
- Only Friend: To Nugget, and his disappearance really does a number on poor Nugget's psyche.
- Posthumous Character: The bloodied shoe and finger in the bathroom implies that he was killed, but it's subverted in that he was captured by the principal to be experimented on.
Faculty
Ms. Applegate
The teacher of the school. She doesn't like the students she teaches. If Buggs robs you of your money, you can tell on him and team up with her to expel him. After that, she offers you gold stars for eliminating the rest of the students.
- Evil Teacher: If you successfully get rid of Buggs, she will then bribe you to eliminate the other students. She also wants to start a kiddie fighting ring.
- Fan Disservice: In the second game, she wears exercise gear in gym class, which features her "scantily-clad", as Nugget describes it, effectively wearing a bra and shorts with an exposed belly. Despite the pixel art, it still does not look good on her.
- Fat Bastard: She is an incompetent and easily winded teacher that can't even recognize a salad.
- Functional Addict: Downplayed in the first game. There is only one time where her addiction to principal's pills affect her overall performance. It is during morning time, where she is lenient towards you raiding your classmates' cubbies. Averted HARD in the sequel. Even a day off of the pills has her both physically and mentally ravaged. She shows very little restraint in her violent tendencies, cares even less about her job, has a massive screaming and sobbing meltdown if pushed too hard, and is not above threatening or carrying out murder when the opportunity to get new pills arises.
- Grammar Nazi: Justified since she's a teacher. If you ask her if you "can use the bathroom" she gives the typical response: "I don't know, caaaaaaaan you?"
- In the Back: To kill Applegate in the first game, you have to get her to turn her back before stabbing her with a knife. Also done to her in Kindergarten 2 while she is strangling Buggs.
- Misplaced Kindergarten Teacher: Inverted. She actually does teach kindergarten, but she has no business doing so with her sadism, depravity, hatred towards her students, and her willingness to murder said students directly or indirectly. She shouldn't be teaching at any grade level!
- Punch-Clock Villain: While she does do some bad stuff, if she has little to no reason to continue teaching, such as there being no students to teach or no principal to get paychecks from, then she books it.
- Rage Breaking Point: After getting frustrated with the protagonist and Cindy in the school yard in Kindergarten 2, the sound of a firecracker going off in the classroom is the last thing to get her to snap.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: Does this in the first game if she realizes that the principal is dead.
- Took a Level in Jerkass: She was already a nasty piece of work in the first game, but she was at least Affably Evil when in a stable mood. In the second game, she is incredibly unhinged and psychotic, and doesn't bother even pretending to care about the students. It's all but stated to be because she no longer has access to the principal's pills, and is going through withdrawal.
- Would Hurt a Child: She is willing to poison food or kill you in an explosion. She's also guilty of this by proxy as well, by giving you the advice and tools to kill your classmates, sending you to the principal with full knowledge of the consequences, and standing by when you're being murdered by Buggs. In Kindergarten 2, she will even beat Jerome to death with her stick after getting hit with a basketball.
Janitor
- Ax-Crazy: He can and will beat children to death with Mr. Sweepy the mop for a variety of reasons.
- Bad People Abuse Animals: He killed Cindy's dog Biscuit and made him into "Biscuit Balls."
- Berserk Button:
- Pointing out his mistakes will make him trash the offending kid back in rage.
- Going into his closet also makes him furious.
- Broomstick Quarterstaff: He regularly uses his mop to stab children to death (or in the case of Monty, near death).
- Companion Cube: It's implied that he considered his mop as a close friend, as during the Talisman Ending, he has his final words with "Mr. Sweepy".
- Crusty Caretaker: He's a creepy old man with a penchant for stabbing children to death with his mop at the slightest provocation, and sells said children "biscuit balls" containing the meat of Cindy's dead dog Biscuit. He also speaks in a rather unrefined fashion, such as calling the protagonist "sonny".
- The Dragon: He seems to be the only person who knows about the principal's experiments and is in charge of disposing of monster bodies.
- Ear Ache: Cindy bites off his ear if she finds out he killed her dog.
- Grammar Nazi: Inverted. He will beat you half to death for daring to point out that he spelled something wrong.
- I Call It "Vera": Calls his mop "Mr. Sweepy".
- Killed Offscreen: After you expose that he's using Cindy's dog as food, she will chase him off the screen. When she returns, she's holding his decapitated head.
- The Nameless: Upon asking for his, he tells you he hasn't had a name since "the war". It was "The Great One" because he was in it.
- Off with His Head!: Cindy tears off his head if she finds out he killed her dog.
- Plot-Irrelevant Villain: In Kindergarten 2, he's not involved at all with the machinations of the new principal, and is solely focused on his one-sided rivalry with Bob.
- Would Hurt a Child: Has no problems stabbing children repeatedly with his mop when they annoyed him too much.
Hall Monitor
- Every Man Has His Price: You can bribe him with cigarettes if you go into the bathroom during lunch.
- Gonk: His large forehead and underbite makes him look like a caveman. That smattering of acne isn't doing him any favors, either.
- Know When to Fold 'Em: He and Stevie will get in your way often in Kindergarten 2, but if he notices the janitor has killed Stevie, he will let you do what you need to in order to avoid the same fate.
- Punch-Clock Villain: He doesn't seem to know or care what the staff he's working for is up too. He's just doing his job, and can even be convinced to look the other way if you bribe him.
- Short Teens, Tall Adults: The acne on his face implies that he's a teen, and as a person around that age, he is shorter than the adults in school.
Lunch Lady
- Blind Without 'Em: Downplayed in that while she's not completely blind, she can't read the cafeteria menu without her specs.
- Chuck Cunningham Syndrome: She is the only character who does not make any appearance nor get mentioned in Kindergarten 2.
- Token Good Teammate: Of the staff. She's the only one who doesn't seem to be secretly sadistic, and most of her interactions with the player are helpful. Not quite coincidentally, she's also the only member of staff that can't directly or indirectly kill the player.
Principal
- Big Bad: He's the one who kidnapped Billy.
- Disproportionate Retribution: Don't have anything for show and tell? Enjoy being expelled.
- Drugs Are Bad: How bad? Well, according to him...Principal: I can put up with a lot in this school. Missing children, violence, a janitor with a questionable past...But the one thing I will not stand for this school is DRUGS!!
- That said, he gave pills to children that gives them relaxing effects, and you will eventually uncover the shady origins of those pills.
- Evil Principal: He serves as the Big Bad of the game, having taken away Billy for his experiments and giving drugs to anybody who tries to look into it. He also has no qualms shooting the kids.
- Hand Cannon: His guns are very large and almost as long as his arms. They somewhat resemble Smith & Wesson 500's.
- Handguns: Uses one as his weapons in dealing with troublesome students.
- Hypocrite: Despite his stance on drugs, he is the one who gives Nugget his pills and can even give you pills depending on your choices.
- Hate Sink: With how the first and second games portray him, he is clearly not meant to be liked, with him being an undercover drug dealer who performs unlawful experiments on kindergarteners, it is by the end that even his own son Jerome admits to him being a terrible person who was undeserving of sympathy.
- Killed Off for Real: His death is the only one that actually sticks in Kindergarten 2.
- Scary Black Man: He's a large, black man whose go-to way of punishing children is shooting them in the head.
- Would Hurt a Child: Is willing to shoot children in their faces without any qualms. He also blows them up with bombs he hands to them if they say something they shouldn't.
