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Funny / Paw Dugan

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  • The Stinger of the Top 9 Music Moments of Gaming (New School Edition): You spoony bard!
  • Getting the Non-Standard Game Over in the Total Distortion review.
  • The Backtracking Song (to the tune of "Ode to Joy") in the "Total Distortion" review. Excerpt!
  • The Sumo Ninja agreeing to kill Paw for a Pizza Hut gift card, after refusing a credit card and a couple of other things.
  • Any video in the Lyrical Poetry series!
  • In the commentary for the Fantasia crossover, Elisa jokes that they still have time to have the marriage annulled. Paw responds thusly:
    Paw: It's too late! I OWN YOU NOW WO-MAN! (Beat.) I'm so sorry.

    Let’s Play 
  • Paw's Let's Play of King's Quest V has two particularly funny moments: Naming a save file "Paw Harpy Rape" and
    Paw: You're welcome, you ungrateful biiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!
    • The crowning moment, however, is at the end of the whole Let's Play... whereas Paw suddenly finds the world works kind of like the King's Quest V world, with interfaces, narrations, etc. And then he dies on a shallow water... and it turns out that King Graham is playing 'Paw's Quest V'.
      • Paw trying to take a drink of water only to be interrupted by the narrator, causing him to jump and Spit Take.
    • Two words: THE YETI.
      • When Graham tries to use the wand on the Yeti:
        Paw: Eat wand-y death, Yeti! [Yeti grabs Graham] Or... eat my face.
      • Paw's reaction to using the pie on the Yeti is priceless!
    • Falling off the edges of cliffs... ESPECIALLY after the Yeti is defeated and Paw saves the game!
      • There is also one time when Graham suddenly trips and falls off three feet from the steps... just before his stock scream is cut off a split-second later by his body hitting the floor, resulting in a senseless death by falling over!
        Paw: That was three feet! What?! Does Graham just- are his bones made out of, like, wafers?
    • "It's a POOOOOIIIISONOUS snake!"
      • "Is it a POOOOOIIIISONOUS boat?"
      • And in the King's Quest V retrospective, he wins a prize for making the thousandth joke about how annoying Cedric is: the ability to force cameos to say the line.
    • "Ah, life-giving water...NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNECTAR of the GODS!!!"
    • "I don't need your help - I have a bag of dried peas!"
    • "If I had another bag of peas, I'd kick your ass!"
    • Cheese powering a magical machine is funny all on its own, but Paw's reaction to it is what really makes this hilarious.
    • Some of the narrator's inexplicable reactions to things in the game, and Paw's reactions to that.
      Narrator:* stunned* "The pouch is empty!"
      Paw: "OH MY GOD!"
    • The end of episode 7, after getting frustrated by the witch toadifying Graham in the woods:
      Paw: Okay, let's see if Crispin can help me out with this.
      (Fast Forward to Crispin's house)
      Narrator: The door to Crispin's house is now locked.
      Paw: Fuck.
    • When Cedric gets injured and Paw leaves him for dead, cackling maniacally. "So long, Cedric! See ya later, sucker!"
      • And then in the next video he has second thoughts and goes back to save the little guy, but still can't resist the opportunity...
        Paw: *selects the hammer from his inventory* I'LL MAKE IT BETTER!
        Narrator: That will do nothing to help Cedric.
        Paw: It'll do something to help me! WHAM WHAM WHAM WHAM!
    • His initial reaction to hearing about Madame Mushka. "THE MAMUSHKA!"
    • Near the start of the LP, Paw remarks that Graham's portrait reminds him of someone, but he can't put his finger on it. A few episodes later, he finally realizes it's Patrick Swayze circa Road House. For the rest of the LP, Graham's talking portrait is randomly replaced by a pic of Swayze dressed as Graham, talking via "flappy head" like South Park's Canadians.
    • After Graham walks onto the anthill by accident...
      Paw: Kicken' dance, dude.
      Cedric: Ooh, is that a new dance, Graham?
      Paw: Don't say it.
      Cedric: The BUG-a-loo?
      Paw: *Loud, pained groan*
  • From his Alice in Wonderland Let's Play, "Fuck ladders, I am invincible."
    • His frustration throughout Part 8, culminating with big Alice hitting the ceiling.
    • Every time he collects an item, he usually starts declaring things along the lines of, 'Mine' 'This belongs to me now' or 'And I will take all of this.' After a while, you just start laughing at it.
    • The unexpected appearance of Christopher Walken in the finale. Along with the Continuity Nod of Paw drinking 'Nectar of the Gods' brand water.
    • His reaction to the image of Alice kneeling down in front of the caterpillar. "Oh, that is suggestive!"
    • He hit kneel in front of the Cheshire Cat. "I just moved to suck off the cat. Interesting." It's his blasé tone that really sells it.
    • He comments that his LP will be full of tiny skip-o-matics. Five seconds later, we get a 'True Dat' skip-o-matic.
    • "Goddamnit, stop trying to suck 'em off!"
  • In one of his co-op Let's Plays with Pushing Up Roses, he's apparently unfamiliar with the use of the term 'mans' for lives, and reacts with confusion every time she uses it.
  • In their co-op The Oregon Trail LP, Paw echoes the sentiment of...basically most people who play the hunting minigame.
    * Takes out a rabbit* "Fuck you, Thumper!"
  • In the Amazon Trail Let's Play with Pushing Up Roses, he gives the Inca king at the end a variety of accents, ending in Tommy Wiseau's.
  • In No One Lives Forever 2, Paw muses, after killing several bunnies with a sniper rifle, "Nobunny lives forever."
  • From his Quest for Glory I LP:
  • In the KQ3 Redux LP, when he discovers that you can have Gwydion fall off the steps in Manannan's spellroom without dying... then does it every single time he goes down there while saying "SHORTCUT!" He does it gleefully several more times while on the pirate ship.
  • From his Quest for Glory II LP:
    • When he can't remember Abdulla's name:
    Paw: And because of this, we got to ride on the magic carpet, which is our one ticket out of town, with this fellow named, um... Hubba...dubbuba... Turban...meister. That's totally his name, don't even bother looking it up, you'll just have to trust me on this one.
    • The name he gives the hero: "YOUR LORD AND MASTER", complete with temporarily raising his voice whenever someone says it.
    • Him freaking out when the tree woman turns around to look directly at him.
    • He gives any woman wearing a mouth-covering veil a muffled voice, making them sound remarkably like Kenny.
  • From his Quest for Glory III LP:
    • As Sneakyfeet is travelling the jungle with Johari, Paw adds some dialogue to fill the void. Namely, Johari telling Sneakyfeet about an Erotic Dream she had about Yesefu.
    Johari!Paw: You should write this down, I want to make a fanfic about this one.
  • In his King's Quest II Redux LP. Paw leaving to microwave some pizza while a character is giving lengthy exposition. After a minute he comes back.
    Paw: What did I miss? NOMNOMNOM!!!
    • Also at one point Paw uses the glass bottle on Graham which the narrator says "Donk!" Paw found that so hilarious he uses that word whenever he can in the LP. Turning it into a running gag.
  • From his Leisure Suit Larry 7: Love for Sail! LP:
    • When Drew asks the waiter for a drink, Paw explains how the game came with the option to record your own voice for certain scenes. He demonstrates this by using a text-to-speech program. That in itself is funny on it's own, but in a seperate video, he uses a few other voices from the program, which includes children.

    The King's Quest Retrospective 

    Music Movies 
  • Dancing the Time Warp.
  • Paw's recap of just how much Prince Ali brings with him in his Music Movies for Aladdin. All 650+ people, animals and servants included.
    • Also, his casual reference to how the artists had "a little too much fun" drawing the dancing girls in Prince Ali's procession.
    • "He was a Dark tall man, with his dark parrot Iago, in the darkest part of the desert, alright, I'll stop."
    • When Paw questions the logic behind "making a prince", Aladdin's "Prince Licence" pops up on screen.
    "Entitles bearer to:
    Court Princesses
    Become a douche
    Lie like a rug
    Learn important moral lessons"
    • When the time comes to get a new movie for the dartboard, he hopes for another Disney movie... and gets Jesus Christ Superstar. However, the REAL clincher is that The Little Mermaid was RIGHT UNDER IT.
  • In his review of Jesus Christ Superstar, his comment that Simon the Zealot's "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-MENNNNNNNNN!!!" should be how all prayers should finish. He then demonstrates and nearly brings down the house. Literally.
  • The reaction shots to Big Gay Al's musical number, good lord.
  • After the crowd disperses after watching the Von Trapp's showstopping "So Long, Farewell" musical number in The Sound of Music:
    Crowd: Terrible... just terrible...
  • Sgt. Howie is burnt to death and then..."OH NO!!! CORN RIGS!!!"
  • Banjo-playing Cyborg Kermit the Frog.
    • Any time he makes the Muppets sound like a minority or slaves.
  • In his recap of Peter Pan, he makes the obligatory "Clap if you believe in fairies" gag:
    Linkara: I believe in fairies! I believe in fairies!
    Phelous: I believe in fairies! According to this cameo for Paw, I believe in fairies!
    The Makeover Fairy: I believe in fairies! I believe in fairies! I am a fairy!
    Vangelus: I believe in fairies! They're delicious!
    • Then during the credits:
      Vangelus: (fiddling with an exacto knife) My sandwich has a first name, it's F-A-I-R-Y...
    • In the same episode, his manly montage upon finding out Peter's a boy.
      Paw: I am a man! (brings out a chainsaw)
  • After seeing the church lead by James Brown in The Blues Brothers, he's excited to go to church for the first time in ten years. Only to find it's not the same...
    Paw: You lied to me!
  • His reaction to the Hell Tunnel in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory is part this, part Nightmare Fuel.
  • Elisa's sockpuppet rendition of Faust.
    • When she gets the socks out again to explain another character, Paw stops her.
    • That whole review is gold, honestly.
    • This troper was anticipating a joke at Jessica Harper's dance. Their reactions to it were priceless.
    • The opening of the review, when Elisa is playing that her Phantom of the Opera dolls are putting a "master plan" into action, only to crumple into a depressed heap when Paw's dart flies through a portal in her wall and hits one. And her entire intro scene with him is accompanied by music from Phantom of the Opera.
    • When Paw plays "The Sword of Damocles" over the beginning of Beef's song, before Elisa puts a stop to it.
    • Paw: "And who do they find?"
      Both: BEEF!
  • When discussing "Fidelity Fiduciary Bank" from Mary Poppins, the old men do a strange choreographed walk. Paw responds thusly...
    "Do the Stuffy Dance! Do the Stuffy Dance! "
  • All of the Edgar Allen Poe allusions in his The Nightmare Before Christmas review, complete with a raven popping up in the corner.
  • From his review of Snoopy, Come Home, the first reprise of "Me And You" starts, and:
    Oh, God, it's "Corn Rigs" all over again!
    • Paw singing the title song with random words in place of Snoopy's name. Eventually, he Skypes Obscurus Lupa so she can hear him sing it with her name. She gets so annoyed, she tries to replace Snoopy's name with Paw's, but discovers it doesn't have the right number of syllables.
  • And in Oklahoma!, Roses evidently knows how to hack into Paw's show to give reasons why she likes the show...ignoring Paw completely.
    on paper Can I please continue?
    • "Spot the lesbian!"
    • Him realizing that the actress must be in her 70s by now.
  • Paw's annoyance with the differences between Annie and its play lead to him deciding to remove Aileen Quinn's pupils, so she could look more like Annie did in the comic. The end result turns out scarier than he expected.
    • Paw re-editing the "Maybe" number to make it seem like the other orphan girls can't stand Annie singing so late at night.
  • From My Fair Lady, his suddenly breaking out into a Spanish weather report, saying that it is going to be fairly chilly and "a real weenie shrinker."
    • His entering a rare RAGE at the movie's ending.
    • "Holy jumpin' fuckin' Jesus!"
    • Paw joining Crazy Hat Day at the Ascot Races.
  • From the Evita review, we have the visual representation of the phrase "Rainbow High."
    • During "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina," Paw wants to look up a reference he doesn't understand. Because his couch is now several feet away from the bookshelf, he comically jumps over it to get to and from the shelf. While the song plays in the background.
  • Paw & Elisa team up again for Fantasia... and they bring the funny again.
    • The return of the sock puppets was brilliant.
    • And during the opening, Elisa chucks Paw's dart at his crotch... twice.
    • During the "Sorcerer's Apprentice" segment, they discuss how it was originally intended to be its own work, but they decide that the plot isn't involved enough and it works better as part of Fantasia. Then "The Rite Of Spring" cues and Paw suggests that it should have been used in The Wicker Man. When Elisa asks which version, he insists on the old one, as Nicolas Cage couldn't do the plot justice. In short, they criticized The Sorcerer's Apprentice without even acknowledging that it exists.
  • Joined by JewWario and Nella, the entirety of the sequel Fantasia 2000 takes place in an alternate universe where, somehow, the first movie doesn't exist.
  • The Cannibal! The Musical review guest stars Brentalfloss, who gives a music lesson which degrades into madness, or at least mild irritation.
  • During the Doctor Dolittle review, Paw gains the ability to speak to appliances. He is then told off by an air conditioner. But the funniest bit is when he is chastised by the do not cross sign:
    Paw: Hello there, Do-not-walk Sign.
    Do-not-walk Sign 1 / Nancy: Don’t you hello me! How many times have I yelled at you not to cross the goddamn street, and yet you do it anyway! I’m like ‘Hey man, stay on the sidewalk. A car could come through at any moment and crush your skull like a cassava melon filled with marinara’, but do you listen to me?! No!
    Do-not-walk Sign 2 / Manny: *Distant* He always stops for me!
    Nancy: You always stop for him! What did I ever do to you, you prick?!
    Do-not-walk Sign 3: Oh, c’mon Nancy, leave him be. He always looks both ways.
    Nancy: It’s not safe!
    Paw: Well, in my defense-
    Nancy, Do-not-walk Sign 3: Hey, hey, hey! We’re talking here!
    Manny: *Distant* Yeah! Mind your business!
    Nancy: Shut up, Manny!
    Paw: I’m just...I’m just going to go...*Starts walking away*
    Nancy: *Calling after him* Yeah! You do that! Ignore some more, why don’t you! It’s only a matter of time, dickhead! You are going to get so run over! You hear me?!
  • In The Muppets Take Manhattan review, the return of Banjo-playing Cyborg Kermit the Frog.
  • For Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Paw has his own Bad Horse Chorus (made up of Nella, Dan Roth and Brentalfloss who sing his junk mail aloud. When they inform him that his car is being repossessed, he feels justified in breaking for a commercial. Then there's the Precision F-Strike at the end.
  • During The Hunchback of Notre Dame review, at the end of the song "The Bells of Notre Dame", Paw drags himself back onto his reviewing couch:
    Have you ever gotten so many goose bumps from a song that you’ve lost consciousness? *Exhale* I can’t feel my fingers.
    • Paw’s various reactions to the gargoyle characters and their musical numbers.
    • Paw discussing the musical motif:
    It’s almost enough for the raging music geek in me, which I admit is fairly close to the surface, to go throughout the entire movie and count the instances of that motif. But, *nervous chuckle* that would be obsessive . . . *laughs nervously* Fourteen.
  • His obsession with the animated household objects/cursed people in Beauty and the Beast, and how many there are.
    Geez, Beast, either you were renting out space thirty people to a room, or you were running a freaking slave ring!
    • then, at the ending
      Human!Beast: Awww, guys, I'm sorry I was such a prick I almost damned you for all eternity, group hug!
  • His confusion at the gender of the plant in "Little Shop of Horrors".
    • Whenever the plant demands to be fed, the word "Feed" is bleeped out, leading Paw to remark that "It's like a hentai dream come true."
    • He flies into another rare rage at the happy ending, and the effects actually make it just as scary as it is funny.
    • A subtle one: At the end, when using the dartboard to choose the next movie (The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies), the picture shows that not only was the title so long that it took 2 strips of paper to have it written out, but there's two darts in it, one for each strip.
  • From his review of The Devil's Carnival: "I swear to God, it's in Paul Sorvino's contract that he gets at least one song where he's allowed to belt his vibrato- man, that sounds filthy!"
  • Brentalfloss's high holiday spirit in contrast to Paw's Scrooge-like attitude at the start of The Muppet Christmas Carol review.
    Brentalfloss:*Scatting Carol of the Bells* Would you like an apple pie with that? Would you like an apple pie with that?
    Brentalfloss: Okay, you know what? You can be as miserable as you want, Scrooge McFuck; I’m going to go deck the fuckin’ halls! Whatever that means.
    • Marley!The Nostalgia Chick gives her warning and fades away. Paw tries to continue with his review when:
    NChick: *Reappears, eerie voice* Forgot my forty. *Picks up bottle of booze and fades away again.*
    • “Holy cra- D-d-did Beaker just flip Scrooge off?” [Replays clip] “This movie has made my cool book.” [Clip plays again in slow motion, with an explosion, a bit of the ‘Halleluiah’ chorus and ‘OWNED’ superimposed over the end of it].
    • The running gag of the exploding wall clocks and Brentalfloss being so nonchalant about it and having (multiple) replacements:
    Paw: *Hanging up a second replacement clock* How much do these things cost you, anyway?
    Brentalfloss: *From the next room* Allow a man some frivolities!
    • Then, when he expects it to explode and it doesn’t.
    • Elisa's appearance as the Ghost of Christmas Past. Literally the moment you see her, before she's even spoken a word, you can tell that she is having too much fun with this just by her get-up.
      • And her later reappearance can only be described as a Jump Laugh.
    • Nella, the bi-polar Ghost of Christmas Present:
    Nella: *Firmly* Now touch my Who scarf. *Threateningly* Touch it!!! *Paw meekly complies. Cheerful* Soft, isn’t it?
    • Also:
    Nella: *Cheerful* Ho! So whimsy is the path to melting that lump of coal you call a heart!
    Paw: -Don’t you guys get about this? I’m not anti-Christmas; I don’t want to review another Christmas Carol.
    Nella: *Cheerful* But it’s The Muppets!
    Paw: But I just-
    Nella: *Firmly* Muppets!
    Paw: But-
    Nella: *Threateningly, music score changes* Muppets are all you need to know. *Paw cowers. Suddenly cheerful, laughs* Jolly!
    Paw: *Whispers* Send help!
    • The reason Todd, the Ghost of Christmas yet to come is mostly silent? He’s completely absorbed in his personal tech device.
    • All the characters are waving goodbye, except Brentalfloss who is now, to both our and his confusion, incorporeal. Just his expression says, Really? Really?! How did this happen? C’mon! before finally joining in on the farewells.
  • His imitation of Snow White's singing voice by using helium and having someone hit his back in order to get the same vibrato. It Makes Sense in Context, really.
  • He and Brentalfloss demonstrate how Fiddler on the Roof's "If I Were a Rich Man" sounds like the singer can only remember half the words.
  • He accidentally refers to Idlewild as a glory hole.
  • In his "West Side Story" review, he runs into a private closet where he bows down to an altar of Stephen Sondheim, offering a freshly slaughtered inferior musical CD to appease him.
    • Paw tries to justify his selection of "A Boy Like That/I Have A Love" for Worst by ingesting some helium (offscreen), then summarizing the song as Maria insisting that Tony will never hurt her because he loves her and "'s love and love love lovey love love love." He caps this off by saying, "Blech!" in his normal voice.
  • While reviewing "Rock of Ages": "I am not a hipster!" as he's wearing a knit hat with shaggy hair and sunglasses...and holds up a Pabst Blue Ribbon can.
  • In his South Pacific review, he starts complaining about the use of colour filters and vignettes. The editing for the gag is perfect:
    Nellie: Just look at that yellow sun! *Cue sudden yellow filter*
    Paw as Nellie: Wow, it looks like that yellow sun is moving closer and closer, ready to engulf us all!
    Nellie *As an angry-faced sun image grows steadily larger in the background*: I don’t think it’s the end of the world as everyone else thinks. *Sudden explosion*
    • Earlier, the summing up of the first fourths of the movie:
    "We're on this island with no chicks except for these really attractive nurses. Hey, all the action's over here on that painting, let's go see! I'm in love! So am I! I'm in love as well! I'm mute. Wait, you used to be married to a non-Caucasian? I'm leaving! You're a non-Caucasian! I'm leaving! Woe and conflict!"
  • Adams' and his wife's letter exchange in his 1776 review, topped off with the sound effects on the horses.
    • Paw finds what he thinks is the synopsis to 1776... but it's really Nella's founding father fanfiction. And yes. It's slash.
  • In his Wizard of Oz review, the cameraman gets bored and starts filming other stuff besides Paw. He focuses on Paw's Xbox controller and tries to grab it, but Paw wrestles it back "You will be educated!"
  • The ending of his The Lion King review, where Paw does the customary dartboard ending and hits The Lion King again. Paw takes this to mean that Disney is getting revenge on him by forcing him to review the sequels.
    • The opening of Paw's Mondegreen lyrics of "Circle of Life"'s Swahili lyrics.
    Mama ditch the baba!
    Shitty boom. Venn ya mon. (Venn ya mon.)
    Naaaaazivania, We're back in key, See the ball (City womb)
    Hem hem mama
    Hide a vase (Venn ya mon.) Scene immobilized (Venn ya mon.)
    Penguin yawner, penguin on my bottom (X3)
  • The confused grandmother from his Lion King Sequels review.


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