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The Imperium of Man
Commissar Ciaphas Cain, HERO OF THE IMPERIUM
Ciaphas Cain is a man of questionable origin - he is commonly believed to be a Hiveworlder, yet no one knows where exactly his birthplace is, maybe not even himself - tall, imposing stature, handsome, charming, and a pathological liar. He was enrolled in the Schola Progenium, where he acquired his commissarial sash despite middling-low performance in academics, excelling only in sports, combat training and discipline note . Shortly thereafter he was assigned to the Valhallan 12th Field Artillery unit, the beginning of a positively ludicrous series of heroic exploits. There's no doubt that his actions on the battlefield were decisive, and they usually directly led to glorious victories of various degrees.However, the reasoning behind them is in the eye of the beholder. According to those he had risked his life to save, he's Cain the Liberator, Cain the Hero, slayer of daemons and leader of men whose biographies verge on canonization. (In fact, one obscure Tallarn cult views him as a living embodiment of the God-Emperor's will.) According to his own secret memoirs, he is a poor, pathetic coward concerned solely with his well-being and escaping responsibility, his every heroic, selfless, or even considerate action taken solely to manipulate others into aiding him.What is he really? That's left for the readers to decide.
- Accidental Hero: Lots and lots of times. He invariably tries to put himself out of harm's way only to inadvertently wind up in an even bigger mess than the one he was trying to avoid, and ends up having to solve the plot to save his own neck.
- Action Survivor
- Alliterative Name: Commissar Ciaphas Cain.note
- Alternate Character Interpretation: Skillfully invoked. If you examine what Cain actually does without his inevitable 5-page pooh-pooh explanation, he's the biggest damn hero in the entire universe, just one with a perverse sense of humility. On the other hand, accepting his explanation that he's "just lucky/unlucky" and that somehow every single allegedly self-serving and cowardly act he does accidentally results in him saving people's lives and looking good at it would make him even more of an aberration in the Warhammer 40K universe. Even the author isn't sure which interpretation is true.
- In Caves of Ice, there's a passage where he muses sadly about all the brave men and women he's seen die, and thinks he's probably the last man alive who even remembers them. Then, in Cain's Last Stand, he feels a pang to realize he can't recall the face of a man who died in Death or Glory some seventy years before. Yeah, he seems really self-centered, doesn't he?
- And when you think about it, he shows a lot of courage at times. In situations of extreme danger and terror, he somewhat calmly analyzes his chances and opts for reasonable courses of action. It is fueled by his wish for survival, but he still shows admirable nerve. Though in at least one situation, Cain admits he has no idea why he did something incontrovertibly, dangerously heroic - and halfway admits he did it simply because Amberley's life was in danger.
- Cain's disgust for what he calls 'Emperor-botherers,' taking a more practical approach to faith and only showing faith in the Emperor because that's what Imperials do, and it seems to be more of an 'on general principle' kind of thing. One troper from the Tabletop Games page of Alternate Character Interpretation, however, has thought Cain to be the most pious Commissar in the history of the Imperium, considering how much he talks about "Emperor-botherers" and how The Emperor has much better things to do than keep an eye on him, and so he should do as much as he can to ensure his survival to allow The Emperor to focus His attention elsewhere, where it's needed.
- It's also thought among fans that he actually was a Dirty Coward at the beginning of the series, and by sometime in the middle of the series he becomes brave and heroic and thinks he's still a Dirty Coward. It is very doubtful that if he was as big a coward as he claims, he could undertake actions as awesome as assembling a Ragtag Bunch of Misfits to take back Perlia or shoot a daemoness in the face with a Meltagun, duel two Chaos Space Marines with his chainsword, or kick a Chaos Warmaster off a roof.
- It's worth mentioning that a lot of his pooh-pooh explanations actually make perfect sense in that the seemingly suicidal course of action really is his best shot at continued survival and comfort, often because he simply can't trust anyone else to follow his Taking A Third Option tactics and attempting escape wouldn't save him in any case, forcing him to take all the risks himself.
- In a spectacular case of Leaning on the Fourth Wall, Amberley Vail notes in the foreword to The Emperor's Finest that the above debate also occurs In-Universe among her readers in the Inquisition.Amberley: ... A reputation, which, true to form, he continues to insist throughout the current extract is completely undeserved. Many of my readers have taken this claim at face value, and many others have construed it as a rather engaging blindness to his own virtues. Having known him personally, I tend to the view that the truth is a little more complicated than either postulation.
- Anti-Hero: Where he is on the scale is intentionally left to the reader. The "he thinks he's worse than he actually is" theory believes he is generally a type 2/3. The "Character development theory" believes he eventually becomes a Type II.
- Artificial Limbs: Cain has two augmetic fingers, replacing those lost to a glancing hit from a Necron Gauss Flayer.
- Awesome by Analysis: His ingenuity and cunning tend to save his life and end those of his enemies.
- Badass Bureaucrat: As a commissar, this is literally part of Cain's job description. Cain tries to avoid the more onerous aspects of the "bureaucrat" part, foisting most of the day-to-day trivialities and paperwork on Jurgen. In a pinch, however, he can and will use his commissarial privileges, the weight of his reputation, and outright Loophole Abuse to cut through mountains of red tape.
- Badass Normal: Despite being an essentially unmodified human with basic Guard-issue weapons, Cain has managed to defeat or at least hold his own against Space Marines, Daemons, a horribly mutated Chaos Warlord, a Broodlord, and a gigantic Ork Warboss. The Last Ditch adds a MAWLOC to his one on one records. Plus a Tervigon, of all things, with merely an over-strength squad and a lone Valkyrie VTOL jet as backup!
- Badass Unintentional: You could make a Drinking Game of Cain assigning himself a mission safely away from what he thinks is the worst fighting, only to end up in an even worse scrape than the one he just escaped and having to save everybody's bacon.
- Bad Boss: Averted and deconstructed. Cain makes plenty of threats, but he's a reasonable man and the only times he's ever executed troopers on-screen were practically Mercy Kill justified cases (or in one case, for trying to kill him). He'd rather earn his soldiers' trust so they're more inclined to protect him in battle and avoid Unfriendly Fire, as tends to happen with unpopular commissars. He and Amberley remind the reader frequently that a commissar's responsibility is maintaining morale, and summary execution is an extreme means of doing so best reserved for desperate cases. (Plus, executions mean more paperwork all around, and Cain's nothing if not averse to that.)
- Both Cain's notable assignments were also situations where the more stereotypical commissar would be unnecessary and counterproductive. The 12th Valhallan was an artillery unit that had few discipline problems and largely fired on distant targets with other Guard units in support. The 597th Valhallan had high morale, high resistance to Chaotic or alien taint, and exceptional supplies. However, the 597th only had high morale as a direct result of Cain's intervention, and in particular due to his reluctance to simply execute a tenth of the regiment to show the rest what happens when you step out of line.
- However, The Greater Good gives us the line "In the Guard people were executed for less [than incompetence]. And some of them by me." Which means that he can be a Bad Boss, should the situation be severe enough. Justified in that he is talking about incompetence that got people killed.
- Battle Couple: Platonically with Jurgen, romantically with Inquisitor Amberley Vail.
- Becoming the Mask: If Cain shows any Character Development over his career, this is likely the cause. The "mask" he wears is one of a humble hero, always eager to put himself In Harm's Way. Underneath that mask, he is primarily interested in self-preservation, having a good time, and avoiding work. However, as he is cast into ever more dire and important situations, his heroic actions become increasingly genuine, even if his thoughts remain selfish. His increasing confidence in his own abilities allows him to consider even relatively dangerous situations "safe" in ways he would not have as a younger man, and his view of self-interest becomes more long-term the more experienced he gets. In his own words:I'd spent so long hiding behind masks I was no longer sure there was a genuine Ciaphas underneath them any more.
- Beneath the Mask: The novels' keystone premise is that Cain is a very different person from how he is portrayed by Imperial propaganda.
- Boring but Practical: He could easily get his hands on a powerful bolt-pistol, but he'd never forgo his handy laspistol. As unassuming as it is, it's got far higher ammo count and accuracy than the other weapons (especially since Cain mastered the art of firing one from the hip) and both have saved his life in many fights. Oddly enough, he also forgoes getting a Hel-pistol, a stronger variant of the laspistol as he fears the heavier weight will throw off his aim despite having plenty of time to practice.
- Born Lucky/The Chew Toy: Cain is dogged by extremely good and bad luck ... and sometimes both at the same time. To everyone else, all reputation boosts seem to be a good thing, but Cain knows that every boost to his reputation eventually leads to him being put into even more dangerous situations.
- Broken Ace: On the outside, he's a charming, charismatic leader of soldiers who is capable of going toe-to-toe with some of humanity's worst enemies. On the inside, he's a psychological wreck plagued with feelings of inadequacy and an inability to recognize his own selflessness. Or just a Manipulative Bastard, exactly as he claims. Then again, Broken Ace and Manipulative Bastard are not mutually exclusive although somewhat contradictory.
- Captain Obvious: During his time with the Reclaimers as whatever illuminating conclusions he'd draw from a situation when around the Space Marines were recognized by them much quicker, though they chose not to vocalize them unless Cain did.
- The Casanova: He mentions several "non-regulation" relationships he has with a number of women who are invariably quite attractive, and a few more had been implied. His relationships with women were wide rather than deep, at least until he met Amberley.
- Character Development: One interpretation: The young Cain is concerned only with saving his own life; he performs heroic deeds just to keep up appearances and avoid Unfriendly Fire. However, as he survives ever more dangerous situations and matures, his actions become increasingly selfless and genuinely heroic, most obviously in his defense of Perlia during the Second Siege. Cain himself does not seem to realize that this has happened, and still considers himself to be the selfish Dirty Coward of his youth.
- The Charmer: According to Vail's footnotes, Cain is one of these. She notes that a certain kind of woman would be easily drawn to his charms, and one who was not too bright to begin with could find herself soon broken hearted. Cain's offhand references to finding himself spending pleasant time in the company of the young daughters of noble families after attending various official functions seem to back this up. Cain seems completely unaware of this, and assumes that these affairs are as casual to the women as they are to him; when one of the women he's seeing starts talking about making plans for their future it catches him completely off-guard.
- Chivalrous Pervert: Despite his amorous adventures (prior to meeting Amberley at least), he never seems to have gotten in trouble for them; the one time he describes meeting an old flame, she certainly shows no sign of heartbreak. The one woman who's hacked off at him for dumping her (by way of a laspistol shot to the chest; It Makes Sense in Context) gives him nightmares for years, and eventually becomes a daemon princess.
- Consummate Liar: Even before he knew about Jurgen, and afterward when he's not around, Cain was confident in his ability to fool mind readers - mostly by controlling stray thoughts. It is implied that he couldn't have defended himself from an actual investigation and is lucky that his memory has never been scanned before. Inquisitor Amberley Vail is the first human being in his life whom he cannot fool no matter how hard he tried, and she's not even a psyker.
- Conveniently an Orphan: Cain himself notes that orphans from well-off Hive World families are often shipped off to Schola.
- Cool Teacher: Cain appears to have become one prior to the events of Cain's Last Stand (or at least he claims to be more relaxed, to the irritation of his colleagues).
- Cosmic Plaything: Cain repeatedly comments that if the Emperor is actually watching him, He has a sick sense of humor.
- Court-Martialed: The Traitor's Hand wraps up with Cain facing a Commissariat tribunal, basically a court-martial by a different name. The charges of cowardice, which were brought by his old rival Tomas Beije on faulty information, are dismissed pretty quickly, and Beije ends up charged for interfering with Cain's effort to save the day.
- Cowardly Lion: Cain is a near-textbook example; a guy with little courage that nonetheless achieves feats of great daring.
- Cyborg: Cain has two augmetic fingers, and in Caves of Ice he mentions that they're the only parts of his body that don't feel cold when he's out in the freezing arctic wind.
- Deadpan Snarker: Best exemplified in The Traitor's Hand, where he never once lets a "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!" pass unmocked.
- Designated Hero: It's a case of Playing with a Trope. Cain considers himself to be one, In-Universe. He doesn't think he's The Hero of this story, he doesn't even think he's a' hero. He's just a guy in the wrong place at the wrong time who coincidentally saves the day while trying to save his own skin and nothing else. Yet he has this reputation as THE HERO OF THE IMPERIUM, and the official records of him describe him as such. The actual narrative, the one we real life readers see, does not portray him as a hero because it's a first person narrative.
- Destructive Saviour: Cain has favored this approach on at least five distinct separate occasions. Granted, all of them crossed the Godzilla Threshold. In his own words, no machinery can cost as much as a life of a single soldier (especially if the soldier in question is him).
- In Caves of Ice, he blows up the very promethium refinery his regiment was sent to defend in order to destroy the Necron tomb and active Warp portal located beneath it.
- In the short story "The Beguiling," he calls down artillery fire on his own position in order to destroy a Chaos coven and the daemonhost it was in the process of summoning.
- In Death or Glory he blows up a major hydroelectric dam to drown an approaching Ork army that would otherwise have slaughtered his band of refugees.
- In Cain's Last Stand he tries to blow up another dam (well, technically it's the same one...) to prevent the Necrons from getting their hands on a potent Warp artifact. Unfortunately, they jam the detonation signal and escape.
- In The Last Ditch he blows up a geothermal power plant (and the city it's in) in order to destroy a crash-landed Tyranid Bio-Ship buried underneath it.
- Dirty Business: There are numerous clues that Cain feels the sacrifices he makes more keenly than he lets on.
- In the short story "Sector 13," he discovers a genestealer cult. At the end of the story, amid general celebration, he's trying (unsuccessfully) to avoid thinking about all the Imperial subjects and guardsmen who're being executed because, despite being loyal, they are infected and there's no way to save them.
- In the first novel, For the Emperor, Cain is forced to gun down a squad of loyal PDF at a checkpoint in order to keep his own mission (escorting Tau diplomats back to their enclave) a secret. Cain finds himself disgusted by it, and has difficulty working out what to say to his troopers. He finally tells the sergeant to tell them that he appreciated what they did. The sergeant says he will, with obvious sympathy, and Cain realizes it was the right line.
- Dirty Coward: Played with. Cain sees himself as this, and a lot of his comments do give that impression, but Cain's actions throughout the books (as Amberley notes frequently) make him out to be cowardly only in his own mind.
- Lovable Coward: He is definitely this though.
- Drink Order: Just about any time Cain mentions drinking something, it's credits to carrots that it's either (alcoholic) amasec or (non-alcoholic) tanna tea or recaff if there is no tanna around. He's a honorary Valhallan, after all, and no Valhallan could imagine a life without tea. This reaches borderline obsessive levels in Death or Glory where the lack of tanna, and Cain asking hopefully, "I don't suppose you've got any," becomes something of a Running Gag. Considering that these novels are British in origin, the 40k setting is British in origin, the Schola Progenium where he was educated is depicted by Cain as being akin to a British Public school, the Valhallans are heavily based on Russians, and Britain and Russia are noted for being tea-drinking countries, this shouldn't come as a surprise.
- Dual Wielding: Laspistol in one hand, chainsword in the other — see the section picture. He takes out an Ork Warboss in Death or Glory this way; the warboss is concentrating on the chainsword and gives Cain a chance to shove the laspistol barrel in the ork's eye.
- Exact Words: Often invokes this to tell a technical truth while sounding like something else. Regarding the necessity of blowing up the promethium refinery in Caves of Ice, he states that "As far as I'm concerned, it's not worth the life of a single soldier". The soldier he is referring to, of course, is himself.
- Fake Ultimate Hero: of the IMPERIUM!
- A Father to His Men: Cain invokes this trope wherever possible, because appearing to care for soldiers under his command means those same soldiers will go the extra mile to protect him from harm. It is perhaps telling, however, that there are numerous occasions where Cain could have sacrificed his Guardsmen's lives to keep himself out of harm's way but chose not to.
- First-Person Smartass: Even when he's "in-character", he's prone to making a few offhand wisecracks.
- The Fool: Cain himself, although not as nice or lighthearted as most examples. He goes into situations with minimal knowledge of what is going on and only his quick thinking and a healthy helping of luck see him through each conflict intact.
- Generation Xerox: Comes up once he's a Cool Teacher, in the form of Donal (who's just too much like Cain himself at that age). The kid even makes Commissar (as an It Has Been an Honor Battlefield Promotion., which kinda spoils it).
- Genre Blind: Every single time he makes up a seemingly important task to keep him out of the fighting it ends up being actually important and more dangerous than whatever he's avoiding. He never spots the pattern.
- Going Native: Whilst living with the Valhallans for an astounding amount of time Cain took some of their customs, such as slang words, usual room temperature to adjust to (even if he still finds it chilling when it's warm for them), and a taste for tanna, a kind of tea which most non-Valhallans find disgusting.
- Guile Hero: Albeit one who gets thrust into potentially lethal physical confrontations far more often than is comfortable.
- The Hero: Both subverted and played straight; Cain spends a good chunk of his memoirs talking of his baser motivations and cowardice while everyone around him praises him as a great hero, due to the results of his selfish and cowardly actions.
- Heroic Build: Going by the cover illustrations, though they are definitely intended to be overblown and not entirely truthful. However, his combat ability and years of practice would make a fit build of some kind to be fairly logical and he's definitely also said to be rather tall in the stories themselves.
- Heroic Self-Deprecation: In spades. To give some perspective: If there is a heroic aspect that Cain may or may not have, he has probably belittled it, claimed that it doesn't exist, or given a selfish reason for it. For example, there's his reason for why he does not fit the stereotypical trigger-happy taskmaster, which boils down to: "Soldiers who hate and fear me will be more likely to aim at me! I will be nice to them, therefore I won't get killed by my own troops!" while conveniently ignoring (or invoking) that this is, you know, a genuinely moral thing to do. He has also downplayed numerous accomplishments that are apparently astounding, such as when he casually mentions that he, the Commissar, is close to the commanding officers and present at the briefings. Note that Amberley claims that this is an extremely rare occurrence, with commissars often being seen as an annoying third wheel in briefings. It's best summed up in this quote, when getting an after-action report from Jenit Sulla she mentions that she thought, "What would Cain do?"Cain: And then did the opposite, I hope.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With his aide, Jurgen. See his entry below.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: A rare nonlethal example. No matter how clever Cain is, any effort he makes to get out of dodge or avoid danger will inevitably end up thrusting him into even greater danger, much to his chagrin.
- Humble Hero: Part of his reputation, much cultivated. Also he frequently fits the part without even noticing it.
- Hypocritical Humor: Rather an inversion of the usual sort. In Duty Calls, Cain is part of a meeting that gets some very scary news. While most of those around him panic, Cain controls his own terror and plans with Colonel Kasteen the actions they'll have to take to deal with the danger. Then he raises his voice to ask a question of the briefer, and notes that his "fraudulent reputation for remaining calm and decisive in a crisis" probably helps settle everyone else down.
- "I only did [heroic thing x] to support my fraudulent reputation for [x]" is practically a catchphrase.
- Indy Ploy: Cain always has a plan... which promptly goes out the window as soon as an unexpected threat shows up. Once this happens, he usually has to think on his feet and come up with a crazy plan to get him (and his soldiers incidentally) out of the situation.
- Informed Flaw: It becomes increasingly hard to believe Cain's really a coward, since we never see him do anything a sensible hero wouldn't do. He says he needs to maintain his reputation so that his allies would make good Human Shields... every time he has to choose between using them as such and risking his own life for theirs.
- In Harm's Way: Inverted. Cain has to maintain the appearance of this trope to keep his reputation intact.
- Invincible Incompetent: A dark and dramatic take on a protagonist who attempts to run away from the action yet always ends up winning.
- Lantern Jaw of Justice: Depicted with one rivaling Marcus Fenix's jaw, which his entry on the character sheet has described as "About a third of his face."
- The Leader: His men see him as a bold and charismatic man of action who cares about each and every one of them. Cain himself would say he's the opposite but invokes this so they will protect him.
- Love at First Sight: Cain has never believed in this; though he can remember every detail of the first time he ever saw Amberley. And proceeds to describe it for us.
- The Magnificent: Cain is known as "the Liberator" on Perlia for saving the planet from Ork domination.
- Male Gaze: Cain is apparently a fan of ladies' rears:
- In Duty Calls he checks out both Amberley's and Kasteen's butts. The second time it actually saves his life — turning his head to enjoy the view a little longer means he sees the assassin drones before they attack.
- In Sector Thirteen, even with a horde of 'stealer hybrids in hot pursuit he's able to appreciate the view while following Sergeant Phu upstairs.
- Master Swordsman: Cain is incredibly skilled with his chainsword, and Amberly posits that he's one of the best in the sector. Regardless of which sector he's in.
- Meaningful Name: Mixed in with a bit of Fridge Brilliance. His first name was that of the rabbi who condemned Jesus, referring to Cain being his own greatest critic, despite how much of a genuine hero he eventually becomes. Not to mention the biblical Caiaphas is condemned in The Divine Comedy as a hypocrite (which is more or less what Cain considers himself). The author even mentions that his name was a biblical reference, but without saying what to.
- Mistaken for Badass: Just mention any of his major exploits to him and this is the explanation you'll get from Cain.
- Motivational Lie: As a commissar these are often necessary. Cain himself is a master of these, showing in his internal narration that he can read people very well and quickly choose the appropriate tone and words that would gain him favor or convince them to do what he needs.
- Multiple-Choice Past: All that can be determined for certain before Cain was accepted into the Schola Progenium was that he spent his early youth on the lower to mid levels of a hive city. The name of the hive city and the world on which it was located remain unknown, as does Cain's parentage. The fact that he was in the Schola means that he was orphaned, and tends to suggest that his parents were loyal Imperial servants, (In contrast, Cain described them as cowards on par with his him.) but Vail has revealed no records that say for certain. Cain seems to use this when meeting new people, adjusting the backstory he tells them to his advantage. As a result, Vail advises the readers to take anything Cain says about his past with a grain of salt.
- Must Have Caffeine: He once fought half-way around an Ork occupied planet to get to the nearest Tanna. He claims this was a joke in the narration, but damned if he didn't check with every person and munitions dump he found on the way.
- Nerves of Steel: Subverted, he appears this way very intentionally, but even as he deals with terrible danger in an unflappable demeanor, inside he's quivering and panicking like anyone else would.
- Played with: While he always expresses fear, he almost never outright panics and can measure his best options for survival in situations that reduce trained, battle hardened soldiers to terror stricken hysteria.
- Nice Hat: He is a commissar, after all. He'd prefer an actual helmet, though.
- Nice to the Waiter: He's deferential to even lower-ranked Administratum drones and other menials, where most Imperial officers would brush them off and insist on getting things done through rigid chains of command. In his usual way, he dismisses this by observing that he only does so because they're the ones who often know the job he needs the best, but the fact that he can think that way at all is itself a step up from the way Guard officers and commissars usually think in this setting.
- Oblivious to Love: This is the case for Cain, but played with interestingly in that he is oblivious to all positive feelings toward him including friendship and admiration, not just romantic ones. He never lets his guard down with anyone, and while he does spend mutually enjoyable time in other's company he sees it as just an entertaining diversion or keeping up appearances rather than a moment of bonding. Fridge Brilliance comes in when one realizes that keeping other people's spirits up is his job, and he never seems to allow himself to break from it. As a result, if anyone goes out of their way to do Cain a favor or support him, he attributes their motivation to his "undeserved reputation" or his authority as a Commissar and never considers that they might actually like him.
- Opportunistic Bastard: Cain rarely goes into a situation with a concrete plan for how to tackle it (or even, at times, a complete picture of what he's actually getting into), but he has a remarkable tendency to find and exploit any advantage that could possibly give him an edge when he's in the thick of things. Interestingly, he's one of the rare few examples of this trope who's self-aware enough of just how shallow his motives run and who has enough of a conscience to actually beat himself up over it in quieter moments (that is, if we take his own account at face value).
- Overshadowed by Awesome: During the seventh book in both a physical and metaphorical sense as Cain is usually one of the tallest and most skilled combatants in a group with a keen analytical mind that allows him to notice things that may escape the attentions of those around him. The Space Marines dwarf him in stature and fighting ability and are just as perceptive as he is if not more so. This is due to Cain being in a relatively early (if eventful) part of his career and the fact that the Reclaimers are, well, The Emperor's Finest.
- Papa Wolf: Shows shades of this as a Cool Teacher, not even trying to justify with cowardice just how much he cares for his little class of Commissar cadets. A Running Gag throughout the series is his attempts to teach them how not to fall victim to Friendly Fire, and he uses all of his experience to make them as effective as possible. Bonus points for actually referring to them as "pups" and featuring Donal as a Generation Xerox (before Cain has to spectacularly avenge him, fully reaching this trope).
- Parental Abandonment: Prerequisite for becoming a commissar. Vail does wonder how true his story is, though, as Cain is a (self-admitted) nearly pathological liar prone to manipulating others.
- Properly Paranoid: He always thinks that situation is going to become much worse than it looks like. As he lives in Warhammer 40000 universe, he's always correct, and that's one of the main reasons he survives.
- Really Gets Around: Has had enough sexual relations across the Imperium that it is probably littered with his bastard children.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: Cain plays with this up and down the scale. He's gained a reputation for being a relatively fair-minded commissar by being willing to listen to other people's concerns, but it's mostly in the interest of saving his own skin. However, when he does investigate the lead everyone else is ignoring, he inevitably ends up uncovering (and defeating) something far more sinister than the original threat. He also mentions repeatedly (and demonstrates it in Cain's Last Stand) that he's trying to instill this approach in the commissar cadets he teaches in 40k's present day.
- Reports of My Death Were Greatly Exaggerated: Cain has been reported as "Killed in Action" only to turn up alive and well so many times that eventually the Munitorum left standing orders for him to be kept on roster and payroll perpetually — orders which are apparently still in force even after his confirmed death (and burial with full honors).
- Retired Badass — Cain in Cain's Last Stand, along with all the other schola instructors. Let that sink in: he's so badass, he's managed what is a nigh-impossible feat in the Warhammer 40K universe: he REACHED RETIREMENT.
- Right Place, Right Time, Wrong Reason: He owes his entire career to this trope. The Emperor appears to have it in for him because almost every act of intended cowardice, self-preservation/gratification or caution on his part ends up being turned on its head and landing him smack dab in the middle of another life-threatening situation. Then again he always manages to survive it with flying colors, so the Emperor might just be doing it because he knows he can take it.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: Cain has tried to pull this on numerous occasions to try and save his own ass. Most of the time it hasn't worked.
- In his first appearance, his attempts to escape a gargoyle attack on his regiment's position on Desolatia end up with him running smack bang into the main Tyranid attack coming from the flank. Fortunately, he is able to both get back to the regiment and raise the alarm, and manages to cover up his attempt to desert by claiming he suspected what was coming and went to scout the area.
- In Caves of Ice, upon discovering a dormant Necron tomb on Simia Orichalcae, Cain wastes no time in ordering a complete Imperial evacuation from the planet. While he admits his primary motivation is to save his own skin, Cain does correctly point out that the Necrons in the tomb likely outnumber the Imperials hundreds to one, and if they do wake up, the Imperials will find themselves caught between the Necrons and the Orks already invading the planet, so the best thing to do in the circumstances is get off planet, alert the Inquisition to what they've found and then call in an Imperial Navy flotilla to obliterate the tomb from orbit.
- At the climax of Cain's Last Stand, with their position about to be overrun by Varan's vengeful Chaos horde, matters swiftly go from bad to worse when a force of Necrons teleports in behind the Chaos forces and begin annihilating the heretics. Realising the Necrons fully intend to fight their way through the Chaos lines to the Imperial position, and aware they're in no shape to fight such an enemy, Cain wastes no time in ordering a full evacuation and orders the Mechanicus adepts on site to detonate the facility's self-destruct mechanism. The Imperials succeed in escaping, but the Necrons sabotage the self-destruct and escape with a powerful artefact the site was housing.
- Selective Obliviousness: Cain is often a very sharp man, picking up on clues and making connections no one else seems to. However, at other times he can be incredibly dense, missing things which are obvious to the reader. Amberly is quick to point out such times in footnotes, Lampshading when Cain really ought to have seen something coming.
- Usually his itching palms will clue him into direct physical danger, but when the danger is more subtle they tend not to trigger. It just goes to show how much Cain depends on his instincts to see him through.
- Cain's own Self-Deprecation gets in the way of him realizing his own importance in a situation. Amberly points out how ignorant he seems of his own positive effect on the morale of guardsmen in the present theater, always worried about failing to live up to that reputation.
- Shell-Shocked Veteran: Cain has numerous nightmares over barely surviving his first experience against Necrons. Amberley also states he is plagued by nightmare for other less specific reasons, doubtlessly reasons tending toward this trope.
- Shrouded in Myth: Cain is one of these in the Warhammer 40K world; whenever he downplays his accomplishments, most people think that it's out of modesty. One religious sect has even proclaimed him to be a physical manifestation of the God-Emperor's Divine Will. Vail playfully points out that Cain would be absolutely horrified if he ever learned about said religious sect.
- The people of Perlia have elevated Cain so high on the hero scale that they actually built a gigantic (and hideous) mechanical clock in the planetary capital that tells time by having a commissar appear and lop off the heads of a number of orks equal to the hour. When the capital is bombarded, Cain asks hopefully if the clock has been destroyed.
- Despite frequent mention of his childhood being spent in a Hiveworld, no one actually knows where Cain was born or anything significant about his past prior to becoming a Commissar. He claims at one point that Kroot killed his parents, but Vail points out inconsistencies in his statement and then points out he is, by his own admission, a pathological liar.
- Slave to PR: Heroic example. No matter what he manages to accomplish, the main reason he doesn't run like hell from the opposite direction of danger at first chance is because it would destroy his indispensably useful heroic image. He keeps digging a deeper hole for himself as his deeds cause his reputation to grow, which in turns increases people's expectations of him, which requires that he keeps charging forward into increasingly worse situations, then when he actually accomplishes more impressive deeds...
- The So-Called Coward: Maybe. Before this goes in YMMV, though, remember the massive entry for Alternate Character Interpretation up above? It could go either way.
- Soldiers at the Rear: What he was hoping for when he pulled some cleverly-attained strings to get assigned to a Vahallan artillery division. Everyone knows how well THAT worked out.
- Stepford Smiler"You could just try being yourself, you know."
The thought was terrifying. I'd spent so long hiding behind masks I was no longer sure there was a genuine Ciaphas underneath them any more, just a quivering little bundle of self-interest.
- Stiff Upper Lip: Cain manages to successfully convince others he has this.
- Sword and Gun: Cain is demonstrably proficient with both his chainsword and his laspistol.
- Taking You with Me: When apparently completely and totally overwhelmed by enemies with zero chance of escape or survival Cain will default to this sentiment and attempt to kill as many of his foes as possible before his death.
- Too Clever by Half: Once in a while his smooth-talking and rhetoric will come around to bite him in the ass, such as when he realizes that his explanations for his current course of action leads to him talking himself into a corner (the corner being effectively volunteering himself for a suicide mission).
- Unreliable Narrator: Cain tends to leave out anything that doesn't directly affect him, so Vail has to use other sources, including (much to her annoyance) the memoirs of Jenit Sulla. Many readers, both real and in-universe, seem to think he overstates his own cowardice. Cain also makes several minor errors of fact which are pointed out and corrected by Vail's notes.
- He's also a confessed master manipulator and liar who favors playing Humble Hero to cement his reputation. Unless we accept the idea that nobody was ever supposed to read this account, everything in it is suspect.
- Unluckily Lucky: Every dangerous situation he gets into is a result of him trying to avoid one that sounds more dangerous on paper, only making it out through luck and foiling an enemy plot in the process. For example, instead of joining the frontline against an ork horde, he attaches himself to a search party investigating tunnels the orks might be able to use, and finds Necrons instead, and only escapes due to Jurgen's Anti-Magic properties. In another, he goes away from the main battle with Chaos forces to an out-of-the-way dredger where there might be a demon summoning taking place. As he'd fervently hoped against, there was.
- Walking Disaster Area: On a few occasions, Cain has actually managed to avoid getting assigned to the more harrowing warzones and found himself in a fairly laid-back posting. Inevitably, something manages to show up and ruin the party. Particularly notable instances include his first field posting to the Valhallan 12th Artillery and his retirement to the schola on Perlia.
- Weak, but Skilled: While he's certainly no slouch by comparison to other humans, Cain is still only a bog-standard human himself (aside from a couple of augmetic fingers). Nevertheless, he has a preternatural ability to manipulate the situation to his advantage when he needs to. He's also one of the best chainswordsman in the galaxy, able to match and occasionally best Space Marine commanders... in an honorable duel, that is; in a life-or-death fight they would just stomp on him.
- We Do the Impossible: Cain's specialty, and the point of the series. His life is an endless cycle of being sent to a new assignment, finding some way to get out of that assignment while still looking like he's doing something meaningful, accidentally stumbling onto the real problem because everyone else was too focused on what was in front of their eyes to investigate, and then throwing every resource at his disposal at that problem because any other option will get him killed. This inevitably inflates his reputation as a resilient, perceptive hero who Gets Things Done, which in turn gets him sent on more of these assignments...
- Weapon of Choice: One of the best chainswordsmen in the galaxy and no slouch with a laspistol.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Cain is absolutely terrified of the Necrons. This is due to his first encounter with them, which resulted in the entire squad he was with being killed, save him, plus two of his fingers being shot off. The experience was so traumatizing for him that even over eighty years later in Cain's Last Stand he admits that he still has nightmares about that mission, and spends most of the book ignoring the clues pointing to their presence because he doesn't want them to be real.
- Worthy Opponent: The Tau see him as one, taking his reputation at face value after their representatives witness several acts of heroism on his part. His dedication to the greater good of the Imperium impresses them greatly.
Gunner Ferik Jurgen
Ferik Jurgen is Cain's personal aide. He has the following notable qualities: his foul smell and general disregard of any sort of personal hygiene; his complete devotion to Cain and strong faith in the Emperor; his overwhelming heroism and courage; and, finally, the fact that he is a blank - capable of completely shutting down any sorcery or psychic effects within certain radius. Cain's closest friend, consistently accompanying him throughout his adventures; the two are both inseparable and deadly together.Understandably but unfortunately, Jurgen is almost universally left out of every story and tall tale about Cain except for his own - all his many achievements are usually credited to Cain, when in reality the two of them tend to work in tandem. Even Jenit Sulla, who obviously enjoyed the esteem and respect of her soldiers, barely noticed Jurgen throughout her career. As Amberley puts it, with the best will in the galaxy, he's hardly the sort of person you want cluttering up a heroic legend.
- Achievements in Ignorance: Cain frequently wonders if Jurgen's life-saving feats are part of a calculated well-hidden genius or if he operates on gut instinct, being unaware that his actions are extremely improbable. Both Cain and Amberly have also mentioned that they aren't sure if he's the bravest man they've ever met, or just doesn't fully understand how dangerous his many adventures with Cain actually are.
- A Date with Rosie Palms: He really, really likes porno slates. Possibly because the only woman to ever express the slightest interest in him was a) an Ogryn and b) very drunk.
- Almighty Janitor: Justified. Being able to boss admirals and generals around when they bother Cain is a surprising ability to someone whose rank is the lowest possible in the Imperial Guard, but he's technically assigned to the Commissariat as Cain's personal aide and, since the Commissariat is outside the Guard's rank structure, he claims that his position places him outside it as well. Unless there's something to be gained by claiming to still be inside the Guard's structure, in which case he does that instead.
- Cain himself sort of jokingly lampshades this by referring to him as "Gunner-First Class" (a rank he made up himself) rather than a mere "Gunner."
- Anti-Magic: Part of being a blank.
- Badass Beard: Jurgen's waived from shaving, ostensibly for medical reasons but presumably because Cain doesn't want to know what lies underneath his permanent unkempt stubble.
- Badass Driver: Driving like crazy isn't a bad thing when there are plenty of enemies to run over.
- Badass Grandpa: During Cain's Last Stand. Juvenat treatments are one perk of being friends with an Inquisitor.
- Battle Butler: Though he reaches it from the opposite end of the spectrum than most other examples of this trope.
- Berserk Button: He's not too fond of treachery, or harming a member of the Ecclesiarchy. Unfortunately his going berserk actually makes him less effective as a soldier.
- BFG: Jurgen acquires a melta, a short-ranged anti-tank gun, in For the Emperor and uses it in every book set afterwards, killing everything from a traitorous guardsman to a World Eaters Chaos Space Marine to a daemon.
- Bodyguarding a Badass: Cain trusts Jurgen to watch his back because of his unwavering loyalty. He's also a crack shot (with a melta, an anti-armor weapon designed for short-range use, to boot) and capable of neutralizing Warp powers, both of which come in handy when the two of them are in a pinch.
- Book Dumb: The more charitable interpretation of Jurgen, who shows both insight and practical wisdom even despite his ignorance and supposed lack of intelligence. He is, however, clearly socially stunted, probably because of the unfortunate side effects of being a blank.
- Chekhov's Boomerang: Jurgen's melta gun and blank abilities save the day at least several times each per novel.
- Covert Pervert: On the one hand, his "nests" often involve several porno slates. On the other, he never mentions this, and certainly never acts on it.
- Crazy-Prepared: Cain describes him as being constantly clad in assault webbing with numerous bags and pouches attached in which he holds everything he thinks he might need. On a couple of occasions he is seen as pulling out something he thought might be useful, such as an extra pair of snow goggles for Cain, or some sandwiches he brought on the chance that Cain might be hungry. Of course, one of those sandwiches got mislaid in the tangle until and forgotten until much later, as in a different book.
- Cursed with Awesome: Being a blank makes him a social pariah and incapable of making real bonds with people (besides Cain)... but the ability to frazzle Warp-based powers has saved his and Cain's bacon many times.
- Disney Death: In For the Emperor he's shot in the head with a bolter. Miraculously, his helmet took the brunt of the blow.
- Drives Like Crazy: But with extraordinary proficiency.
- Dude, Where's My Respect?: He doesn't usually notice the more subtle jabs at him, and doesn't really go out of his way to get recognition for his work, but he tends to react very poorly when people fail to respect his position as Cain's aide. He even gets grumpy if Cain does things Jurgen thinks are below his respect as Commissar.
- Dumb Is Good: Jurgen seems to be this at first glance, but he's remarkably insightful, has an amazing knack for scrounging, and is extremely diligent and thorough. What intelligence he may lack is made up for by unyielding faith in the Emperor's will and a pragmatic outlook along the lines of "The Commissar is always right."
- Caves of Ice even has a scene where he thinks so far ahead that he actually saved Cain's life by bringing along an extra pair of snow goggles, reasoning that Cain would forget them himself.
- Empowered Badass Normal: Already an enormously competent soldier, the discovery that he was a blank was the icing on the cake.
- Hammerspace: Downplayed. Jurgen carries so much useful stuff in pockets/belts/bandoleers that Cain wonders how he manages to lug his weapons around and still have enough room for ammo.
- Hard Head: He survives a bolter shot to the head. True, he's wearing a helmet, but bolters are described as bursting human torsos on a regular basis, and it had just killed another soldier. Presumably the shell hit his helmet at an oblique angle and deflected without penetrating and detonating.
- Hero of Another Story: The author has stated that Jurgen has a good claim to being the real hero of the stories, "if anyone ever noticed him."
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: With Cain, as is more and more obvious over the course of the books. Although Cain makes fun of Jurgen frequently in his narration, the two of them are very close — Cain describes Jurgen as the only man he ever really trusted, is crushed when he thinks Jurgen's dead, and is probably Jurgen's only friend even though Jurgen's blank status effectively makes him supernaturally unlikable. Jurgen, for his part, serves Cain with unfailing loyalty and fellowship, is always ready to assist Cain in any capacity, and repeatedly dares almost certain death purely for the sake of companionship.
- Hidden Depths: To most who meet him he's just the disheveled smelly soldier that brings the Commissar's tea. In reality he's one of the most skilled infantrymen in the Guard; a crack shot who is utterly fearless in battle, an expert at battlefield stealth and operating behind enemy lines, significant tactical insight, and a keen understanding of how best to engage most of Humanity's enemies won on the battlefield. He's also a skilled scrounger, an excellent (if terrifying) driver, an expert at the Imperial Military's labyrinthine paperwork and official protocol, and loyal to a fault.
- Hypercompetent Sidekick: He was initially introduced as a Bumbling Sidekick, but rapidly became an elite (if still immensely dirty) soldier who sticks with Cain for practically his entire, insanely dangerous, career. Although Cain is actually a fantastic warrior and leader, Jurgen saves his life as many times (if not more) than Cain saves his and Cain is under no illusions that Jurgen (as a blank) is more valuable to Amberley than he is.
- Improbable Aiming Skills: In The Emperor's Finest Cain has Jurgen take a shot at a fuel tank too far for him to hit himself. Jurgen has to try a few times, but then it's revealed he was actually aiming for the release valve, assuming that was what Cain meant.
- I Owe You My Life: It's never explicitly mentioned, but this may be one reason why Jurgen sticks so close to Cain. See the Fridge Brilliance section for details.
- Kill It with Fire: Jurgen's Meltagun has saved him and Cain a number of times.
- Limited Advancement Opportunities: Cain has Jurgen as his sidekick for roughly a century but Jurgen never once gets a promotion. In fact, he spends his entire career with the grade of gunner, the artillery regiment version of an infantry private. Although Cain has occasionally introduced him with the fictitious rank "gunner first class". Potentially Amberley's doing to prevent him from getting more widely known, jeopardizing his usefulness as Cain's (and her) ace in the hole due to being a blank (and as an aide to a commissar Jurgen has authority well beyond his titular rank anyway).
- Literal-Minded: He occasionally has trouble with parsing metaphors, leading to a few amusing incidents.
- Loners Are Freaks: In Jurgen's case, though, it's the freakishness which causes the social isolation. Most other people find blanks to be subtly unsettling and thus look down on them with contempt. The fact that Cain still treats Jurgen like a human being ought to is yet another sign that some readers use to claim that Cain has hidden strength of character.
- Mage Killer: Cain expects Vail to make him one of those, although she decides not to, as having a covert ops blank is indispensable. He still functions as one whenever Cain encounters an enemy with Warp powers.
- No Hero to His Valet: For all of Cain's posturing in an attempt to keep Jurgen sufficiently impressed by him, Jurgen is under no illusion that Cain is invincible or infallible often revealing to his companion's relief precautions he himself has taken in lieu of the latter's carelessness and vulnerabilities. However, unlike most examples of this trope, he nonetheless regards Cain as worthy of his loyalty and respect.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: There has been only one time in Cain and Jurgen's entire combined career that Cain has given Jurgen an order and Jurgen has declined to follow it- during Cain's Duel to the Death with Ork Warboss Korbul, Can frantically shouts for Jurgen to "shoot the frakker!" Jurgen refuses, quickly explaining that if he intervenes in the battle (which Korbul made a 1v1 by challenging Cain himself), the other lesser warbosses serving under Korbul will decide it's fair fir them to pile in and kill all of them. Cain knows that if he repeats the order Jurgen will obey despite his misgivings, but decides it's better to trust Jurgen's judgement in this case.
- The Pigpen: Exaggerated. Jurgen's body odour and grime is mentioned constantly. He is exempt from standard Guard cleaning regulations due to his variety of skin conditions. It's suggested that this is supernatural in origin - as a blank, Jurgen doesn't connect spiritually to other people like normal humans do, as interpersonal interactions have an underlying psychic component. It's almost like a really dirty, stinky version of the Uncanny Valley. At one point, the next day after bathing even longer than Cain, Jurgen is described as looking almost as dirty as he was beforehand already. As a blank, he may simply have stopped caring about hygiene and etiquette when he realized nothing he did would make most people like him.
- In fact, it's suggested that Jurgen's body odor is directly connected to the radius of his blank abilities - Cain smelling Jurgen and the anti-psyker effects manifesting are always linked.
- Cain often mentions that he quickly turns any quarters assigned to him into a complete mess.
- Power Nullifier: As a blank, Jurgen often serves this role.
- Quick Draw: When the two are surprised he can have his shouldered Lasgun pointed at the enemy and empty a clip before Cain gets his pistol out.
- The Reliable One: Jurgen never fails to be a constant help to Cain in his endlessly dangerous life, sticking with him through everything, saving his life repeatedly and thinking to lug around various things he'd imagine could have been useful.
- Rules Lawyer: As a Gunner, Jurgen is a member of the Guard. As Cain's aide, he is technically seconded to the Commissariat. He tends to ignore the legal snarls about his precise status unless he absolutely has to, at which point he chooses whichever side brings him advantage at the moment.
- The Scrounger: Another indication that Jurgen's smarter than he lets on, though the proxy use of Cain's commissarial authority helps. Cain finds this talent to be quite useful, and admits that he doesn't ask questions about Jurgen's methods to avoid knowing anything incriminating.
- This turns into the focus of the Jurgen-focused short story The Smallest Detail. He goes through a Quartermaster's depot so thoroughly the guy panics and thinks he's being audited. Jurgen actually did find evidence he was selling stuff on the side (the records were suspiciously meticulous), but it's so expected it didn't even occur to him to report it until the man tried to have him silenced. When the bad guys are defeated and their truck full of stolen goods is spilled out on the road, Jurgen loots the pile right in front of the MP officer he was working with.
- Sidekick: Even if every history about Cain's adventures but his own leaves him out entirely. A fact which Cain reputedly hated, as evidenced by his disdain for the holodrama Cain's Heroes, about his adventures in Death Or Glory, which left Jurgen and several other vital characters out completely.
- Sidekick Ex Machina: The "Jurgen ex machina" is notorious among fans of Ciaphas Cain. He's almost always what allows Ciaphas to execute the killing blow. When he doesn't simply pull his melta and do it himself.
- Spanner in the Works: Nobody ever expects Jurgen, and it tends to be the downfall of anything even remotely psychic.
- Stating the Simple Solution: In one instance in For the Emperor, Cain and company are trying to work out how to get the Tau ambassadors they're escorting through a hostile mob. Jurgen's solution? Get the ambassadors to ask the crowd to let them through, as the crowd is made up of Tau sympathizers. It works.
- The Stoic: Cain frequently describes his general attitude as "phlegmatic." There's remarkably little that fazes or flusters him (and having traveled alongside Cain as his aide, he's seen almost everything the universe could throw at an Imperial Guardsman and lived to tell the tale).
- Not So Stoic: When it comes to orks (like all Valhallans, he despises orks) or, more amusingly, other helpstaff. In the latter case, Jurgen turns outright snarky.
- Understatement: Espouses a lot of these though it's debatable if they're further indication of his simplicity or the subtle hinting of snark.
- The Watson: If it doesn't have anything to do with Orks, combat or his duties as an aide, Jurgen's quite fine with taking things at face value which only provokes Cain into even higher bouts of paranoid (and eventually justified) analysis.
- Weapon of Choice: The trusty meltagun, which also works as a Chekhov's Boomerang. If a melta isn't available, he's quite proficient with that old Guard standby, the lasgun.
The Valhallan 597thThe Guard regiment Cain spends most of his career with, made up of survivors of the Valhallan 296th and 301st, which both suffered massive casualties in a campaign against the Tyranids on Corania. Natives of planet Valhalla, a vicious ice worldnote , are real Vikings in all but the name, providing steady reinforcements for the Imperial Guard. They love snow and tanna - a Valhallan considers it balmy if there's just frost on the windows- and they hate orks with a ferocious intensity. Most of Cain's commissarial career revolved around serving with Valhallans even though he isn't a native; consequently, he picked up quite a few of their habits (although he never did quite get around to being accustomed to cold showers).In contrast to the stereotype sometimes shown in the main Warhammer 40,000 universe, where Valhallans fight with human-wave tactics reminiscent of the Great Patriotic War at its bloodiest, the Valhallans of the Cain-version of Warhammer 40,000 are extraordinarily proficient and professional soldiers and almost unmatched in arctic environments.
Colonel Regina Kasteen
Former commander of 296th Valhallan Regiment, now commander of 597th Valhallan Regiment. During the Battle for Corania prior to Cain's arrival, both the all-female 296th and the all-male 301st were decimated in combat against the Tyranids. The two units ended up being amalgamated into a single combined regiment and immediately began going at one another's throats, creating a discipline problem that eventually required High Command to send a commissar. They were lucky to get Cain; any other commissar probably would have decimated the regiment and redesignated the survivors a Penal Legion.As the 296th had been a rear-echelon regiment for most of its history, the newly-promoted Colonel Kasteen felt an immense need to prove herself to the more experienced veterans of the 301st, particularly her newfound subordinate Major Broklaw (particularly as she got the colonelcy by virtue of three days seniority). She acquitted herself admirably during the 597th's first battle as a unified whole at Gravalax and has since served with distinction.
- Colonel Badass: She's more than capable of holding her own in a firefight.
- Deadpan Snarker
- Desk Jockey: Holds a bit of a grudge over how she can't kill enemies personally now. When given the chance to butcher heretics on Adumbria, she reacts like a kid in a candy store.
- Hand Cannon: Favors a bolt pistol as her sidearm.
- Heroes Want Redheads: Cain prefers blondes, but finds Kasteen attractive. He doesn't make anything of it, though, because that would overcomplicate their relationships, and because Amberly would kill him — literally.
- Ms. Fanservice: Her military uniform has a cleavage, and around half the male characters blatantly admire her looksnote .
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: When Cain arrives to act as Commissar to the Valhallan regiments, he notes Kasteen is actually pleased to see him. Since the majority of the Guard regard Commissars with terror, considering the appearance of one usually precipitates a round of executions, this is Cain's first clue he is going to have his work cut out for him with the regiment.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: With Broklaw; Kasteen is the more passionate and aggressive of the two, fitting the "red oni" personality.
Major Ruput Broklaw
Former commander of 301st Valhallan Regiment, now second-in-command of the 597th Valhallan Regiment. During the Battle for Corania prior to Cain's arrival, both the all-male 301st and the all-female 296th were decimated in combat against the Tyranids. The two units ended up being amalgamated into a single combined regiment and immediately began going at one another's throats, creating a discipline problem that eventually required High Command to send a commissar. The 301st had been a frontline combat unit with decades of service and experience; as such, Broklaw initially resented being junior to a relatively green commander like Kasteen, especially since she got promoted to the colonelcy by virtue of three days seniority.Through Cain's manipulations, however, the pair became Fire-Forged Friends over the course of the Gravalax Campaign. Broklaw and Kasteen have effectively become the command equivalent of a Battle Couple, functioning more like equals than as commander and subordinate and sharing the regiment's leadership burdens.
- First-Name Basis: Lets a "Regina" slip through to his C.O. on occasion.
- Gray Eyes: One of the first indicators of his steely demeanor.
- Hypercompetent Sidekick: In his own mind just after the amalgamation, as he was a front-line soldier and the 296th had been a rear-echelon unit.
- Majorly Awesome: Had frontline experience before the 597th's formation as an amalgamated regiment, and puts it to good use in the firefights we see him in.
- Passed-Over Promotion: At the time of the amalgamation, he and Kasteen were both Captains. Despite having far more combat experience than his female counterpart, she was chosen for the colonelcy because she had three days seniority in rank over him (Which in context meant that it took his superiors three days longer to get eaten by Tyranids than hers did). He resents this for a sizable portion of the first book, but eventually gets over it.
- Percussive Maintenance: Whenever the hololith malfunctions, he's usually the one to give it a whack if there are no techpriests around.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: With Kasteen. Broklaw is the more cold and calculating of the two, fitting the "blue oni" personality. He's also brusque and doesn't care overmuch for fools.
- Snark-to-Snark Combat: Engages in this with Kasteen, Cain and on occassion Sulla; initially hostile, but as time goes on, it becomes more good natured.
A former quartermaster officer of Valhallan 296 all-female regiment, she initially hated the merging between 296th and 301st regiments and, by proxy Ciaphas Cain himself, but grew up to respect the new traditions and genuinely admire Cain, seeing him as somewhat a mentor figure. She basically is what Cain is believed to be, perhaps to the extreme. As her patriotic fervor and hastiness verge on Leeroy Jenkins levels, all her colleagues view her as something of a liability and predict that she'll either be sidelined or get herself killed in an impetuous charge.In fact no one guessed correctly, and Sulla's meteoric advance ended with her at the rank of Lady Generalnote , the highest rank in the Imperial military outside of the high command, and the only Lady General in history of the Imperium. She was even popular enough to publish successful memoirs, although Amberley describes them as a "one-woman assault on the Gothic language."Amusingly, Sulla appears to have taken Cain's public persona at face value, and clearly considered him a mentor at the very least.
- Animal Motifs: Cain regularly compares her to a pony.
- Blood Knight: She's actually a very good officer, with solid tactics, a can-do attitude, and an inspirational and morale-boosting personality. Unfortunately, in the universe she inhabits, it leads to her and her squads charging blood-crazed genetically engineering killing machines (Orks, Tyranids, Chaos Space Marines...) with flak jackets and a laser gun with a knife on the end of it. And winning.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer:
- Her personality is quirky at best and she is a lousy writer, but she is an exceptional quartermaster, she is very responsible, and going from a simple enlisted soldier without connections to Lady General means her tactics must have eventually evolved way beyond screaming and charging.
- Her skills as a quartermaster really shine in The Last Ditch, where she completely decimates the local planet's Administratum to gain access to some orbital shuttles that were 'overlooked'. Cain tagged along to try and add his weight to the discussion, but readily admits he ended up just watching Sulla bowl over the bureaucratic interference like a Baneblade through a horde of Gretchin.
- Didn't Think This Through: Shortly after Cain's arrival, a riot breaks out between the 296th and 301st that leaves three people dead, fourteen in the infirmary and a multitude of troopers facing disciplinary charges up to and including murder. When Cain investigates what happened, he is somewhat incredulous to find Sulla ordered the evening's meal to be served on the 296th's regimental crockery on account of the fact it was the anniversary of the regiment's founding, clearly not taking into account, as Cain points out, the 301st would probably interpret it as an insult.
- Giftedly Bad: Aforementioned memoirs contain insanely overcomplicated and frilly language to the point of being utterly unreadable, and Amberly keeps apologizing about including it.
- Ignored Enamored Underling: Downplayed in that it's only platonic, but it's clear from the excerpts from Sulla's memoirs that she has a major case of hero worship for Cain... while at the same time, it's clear from his accounts that he regards her as both a pain in the ass and a rash commander (though he does grow to appreciate her talents as the series unfolds).
- A Mother to Her Men: Sulla's intense pride and faith in her soldiers shines through her horrifically purple prose, and probably explains her popularity with same. Cain notes that while her units tend to sustain slightly higher casualties than average,note they also have even higher morale.
- Tsundere: Sulla initially disliked Cain rather strongly, but quickly shifted to inordinately gushing hero-worship verging on a crush.
- Up Through the Ranks: Exaggerated. Started as an enlisted quartermaster, and makes it to first lieutenant, then captain on-screen. Off-screen, she became the only Lady General in the Imperium's history.
- What Would X Do?: Asks herself this about Cain.Cain: And then did the opposite, I hope.
A sergeant in the Valhallan 597th, Penlan is noted for being very accident-prone, leading to her nickname "Jinxie".
- Cursed with Awesome: She causes accidents through her clumsiness every time she's mentioned. They all work out in her favour though, so it's something to laugh about. Also, her squad have heightened morale, as they trust her to be the resident Weirdness Magnet.
- Cute Clumsy Girl: She's quite accident-prone, but the fact that it generally works to her squad's advantage has made her into something of a combination mascot / good luck charm.
- Eating the Eye Candy: In The Traitor's Hand she was almost jealous of a picture of Slaaneshi artwork in a sexual position she thought impossible. Cain assured her it wasn't possible, and that even if it was it would be against regulations.
- I Just Shot Marvin in the Face: In The Last Ditch she hits a heavy weapon with the butt of her lasgun, causing it to discharge. Fortunately, it hit an Ork pilot.
- The Jinx: It's in her nickname. She's always either causing accidents or getting herself stuck in sticky situations. Fortunately it generally works out for her and her squad.
- Lethal Klutz: Although fortunately for her and her squadmates, she hasn't caused any friendly fire incidents this way — the only things killed in such incidents tend to be things the Valhallans are trying to kill in the first place.
- Sergeant Rock: It's sometimes lost under the focus her reputation for being a klutz gets, but she's an effective leader in her own fashion.
- Unluckily Lucky:
- Her clumsiness always causes problems, but they always end up working in her and her companions' favor. This actually improves her squad's morale since they trust her to be resident Weirdness Magnet.Cain: She's not nearly as accident-prone as she's supposed to be. I'll grant you she fell down an ambull tunnel once, and there was that incident with the frag grenade and the latrine trench, but things tend to work out for her. The orks on Kastafore was as surprised as she was when the floor in the factory collapsed, and we'd have walked into right into that hrud ambush on Skweki if she hadn't triggered the mine by chucking an empty food tin away...
- It's about this point Cain shuts up, finally listening to the words coming out of his own mouth.
- Her clumsiness always causes problems, but they always end up working in her and her companions' favor. This actually improves her squad's morale since they trust her to be resident Weirdness Magnet.
A sergeant in Sulla's platoon, who shows extreme professionalism in his job, something Cain appreciates when needing his back covered.
- Consummate Professional: Something Cain likes.
- Field Promotion: Is bumped up to Lieutenant when Sulla is given a brevet Captaincy.
- Irony: Lustig was one of those "I work for a living" Guardsmen who disdained officers. His field promotion's irony was not lost on Cain.
- Sergeant Rock: For most of the series.
- Up Through the Ranks: As above.
Grifen's squadThe soldiers of Grifen's squad are a mixed squad of the Valhallan 597th. They include Sergeant Grifen, Corporal Mari Magot, Janny Drere, and Vorhees. Cain gained respect for them after the events of Simla Orichalcae: Grifen and Magot managed to survive where hardened stormtroopers did not.
A squad leader in the 597th. Implied to be in a relationship with Magot.
- Battle Couple: Implied between Grifen and Magot.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Grifen is blue.
- Sergeant Rock: Thanks to her leadership, her squad is consistently one of the toughest and most successful in the regiment.
- Undying Loyalty: To Cain. In The Traitor's Hand, she stares down another Commissar trying to arrrest Cain on (fradulent) charges of desertion, making it plain the other officer will have to go through her and her squad to get him, even when the Commissar lines up a headshot.
Corporal Mari Magot
A member of Grifen's squad, and implied girlfriend.
- Berserk Button: Let's just say she has a few, but threatening Grifen is a big one. Sexism seems to be another big one: When a Tallarn squad refuses to participate in an athletic competition because the Valhallan 597th team has women on it, she tracks down the squad leader responsible and thrashes him. To quote Cain: "Knowing Magot, she undoubtedly threw the first punch. And probably the next couple too."
- Blood Knight: She relishes any chance she gets for a good fight.
- Camping a Crapper: In Caves of Ice, grabs the chance to kill an ork that's in the middle of a latrine stop.
- Curb-Stomp Battle: In The Traitor's Hand, while en route to their warzone, the Tallarn 229th, one of the regiments the 597th are travelling with, having a somewhat conservative attitude to regiments including women refuse to take part in an inter-regimental competition in unnarmed combat as the 597th included women in their team, considering it unseemly. In Cain's words, the next time the 229th's regimental champion in hand-to-hand combat entered the transport ship's recreational area, Magot promptly pounced on him and subjected him to an "impromptu bout" in which she pounded him flat, despite the fact she only came up to the trooper's chin (which is okay as it only took her a twelfth of a second to bring it down to the level of her knee).
- Drives Like Crazy: Remarked as being the only other driver in the regiment that's comparable to Jurgen. Cain can recognize when she's behind the wheel, even when he's not inside the vehicle. The following exchange takes place after a Chimera roars into a crowd of refugees and runs over a Tyranid Lictor.Cain: Nice driving, Magot.
Magot: You're welcome, commissar. How did you know it was me?
Cain: Lucky guess.
- Fiery Red Head: She has bright red hair, and her... exuberant personality definitely lives up to the fiery aspect — as does her kill count.
- No Kill Like Overkill: Cain notes that to Magot, the word "overkill" is inherently meaningless.
- Pet the Dog: Cain gives her a bit of a pep talk to get her moving and provide some encouragement when Magot appears to be on the verge of a nervous breakdown in the middle of a Necron tomb.
- Psycho Lesbian: A somewhat benevolent version, as most of her lethal instincts are channelled into fighting enemies of the Imperium.
- Red Oni, Blue Oni: Very, very red with Grifen's blue.
- Sociopathic Soldier: Cain describes Magot as "a cheerfully sociopathic young woman" who would probably have caused the civilian authorities plenty of trouble if the Imperial Guard hadn't channelled her energy towards the enemy.
- Trading Bars for Stripes: Cain strongly suspects that this trope is how Magot got into the Guard in the first place.
Janny DrereA member of the squad injured by an ambull attack during Caves of Ice, saved by Cain's decision to send some soldiers back with her. She was implanted with augmetic lungs due to her injuries. In a relationship with her squadmate Vorhees.
VorheesDrere's boyfriend and fellow squad member, he is extremely loyal to Cain for saving his girlfriend's life.
- Battle Couple: With Drere.
- Berserk Button: Don't threaten Janny when he's around.
- Screaming Warrior: Cain mentions that there was angry roaring going on when Drere was injured, but doesn't specify if it was Vorhees or the ambull. Amberly allows that "either or both" seemed reasonable.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: He's just as nervous around ambulls as Janny is.
Amberley Vail and entourageWhilst travelling around the galaxy aboard her personal yacht Exterminatus Externus, Amberley Vail finds numerous persons whose talents she may put to good use. No one had denied her requests for help yet, because saying "No" to an inquisitor is usually suicidal at best. As such, she acquires a personal Ragtag Bunch of Misfits to assist her on her missions. Their personality quirks are numerous to the point that Cain wonders if she specifically searches for Bunny Ears Lawyers. (Amberley's footnote replies that she doesn't actually look for eccentrics, but she works in a strange business and the people involved are bound to be unusual.)Although technically Cain and Jurgen work on her behalf, they are still active Guardsmen and as such don't count.
Inquisitor Amberley Vail
An inquisitor of the Ordo Xenos, she's met Cain during his campaign of Gravalax, and he's remained her agentnote ever since. Amberley appears to be unusually unaffected by her experiences and knowledge, able to face the universe with a smile and a quip, only occasionally allowing the strain to show to her closest allies. To most who meet her, she appears as a cheerful, slightly whimsical young woman about as far from the normal appearance of an Inquisitor as it is possible to be (which is, of course, the point).She is also the editor of Cain's memoirs, cutting and cobbling them together from a stream-of-conciousness into something readable, providing footnotes and general overview of the current situationnote . Amberley is both Cain's critic and his ardent defender, as exhibited by her copious footnotes.
- The Ace: Some of this comes with the office: a successful Inquisitor must think fast and well, be a master of plots and deceptions, and fight at least decently. Massive resources and theoretically unlimited social/political power add to the impression as well. Still, Amberley's sheer unflappability and ability to be a step ahead of everyone make her an Ace among Aces.
- Action Girl: She's an Imperial Inquisitor. Kicking inordinate amounts of ass comes with the territory.
- Battle Couple: With Ciaphas, at least once while she's wearing Golden Power Armor.
- Bling of War: Amberley's powered armor is bright gold and covered in lots and lots of devotional icons.
- Bond One-LinerAmberly: Consider yourself relieved of your position.
- Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Invoked. Also possibly a straight example — Cain points out she's using all of her elaborate disguises and personas because she's just having fun.
- The Chains of Commanding — Amberley usually hides it behind her flippant, cheerful mask, but on several occasions she admits to Cain that it's hard for her to remain detached from the suffering caused by the intrigues it's her job to prevent.
- The Chanteuse: This is her cover in the first book. Cain specifically notes her sultry contralto singing voice when the two are first introduced.
- The Chessmaster: Though Amberley is not afraid to get her hands dirty, she tends to prefer solving problems by employing her Inquisitorial authority to arrange to have the right people in the right place at the right time to make a difference. This is a big part of why she and Cain keep running into each other: she specifically requests his regiment to intervene in conflicts she has a professional stake in because she knows she can make use of him directly or count on him to do what is needed.
- Clingy Jealous Girl: Amberley shows signs of this in the footnotes whenever the young Cain has a new relationship with another woman. Also, in The Last Ditch, when Cain expressly denies having any liaisons other than Amberley, her comment is as pointed as it is laconic: "So I would hope."
- Cloudcuckoolander's Minder: An inquisitor's retinue is often a collection of some of the Imperium's most dysfunctional individuals, and Amberley's is no exception. Her sanctioned psyker Rakel in particular often needs Amberley to keep her on her leash and translate her incoherent babbling into something meaningful.
- Contralto of Danger: As mentioned under The Chanteuse, she has a sultry contralto, and as an Inquisitor she regularly confronts some of the Imperium's most dangerous foes and comes out on top.
- Deadpan Snarker: Presumably, this is one reason she and Cain get along so famously.
- Foil: Again to Cain. Amberley shares his talents at manipulation, charisma, and snark, but is dedicated, courageous, and a pragmatic idealist of sorts where Cain's a deeply skeptical cynic. She's also ready to defend him when he's always ready to condemn himself.
- Genki Girl: Surprisingly cheerful and energetic for a fully-fledged Inquisitor.
- Hero of Another Story: There are just enough hints and passed-over Noodle Incidents in the footnotes to imply that Amberley has been involved in some interesting adventures herself when she's not working with Cain. Then again, she's an Inquisitor, so that's to be expected.
- I "Uh" You, Too: Though nothing of the sort is ever said "on camera", Vail does at least admit in the footnotes that she and Cain were more comfortable around each other than around most others. Which would be cute enough, if it wasn't an Inquisitor talking.
- Manipulative Bastard: Not evil by any means, but like Cain, Amberley's very good at manipulating others' feelings.
- Obfuscating Stupidity: More like Obfuscating Eccentricity. She acts like a cheerfully whimsical woman, which belies how dangerous she really is.
- Older Than They Look: Inquisitors have their secrets. She's apparently remained young for around fifty years at least.
- Only Sane Woman: Amberley certainly believes herself to be among the less-crazy Inquisitors, with similar respect for Inquisitors of the Ordo Xenos in general. She has particularly obvious disdain for many of the Ordo Malleus, and unflattering descriptions of the more stereotypical Inquisitors of the 40k universe. Case in point: when Cain describes the Inquisition as "the Emperor's pet psychopaths," Amberley refers to it as "Not the most flattering description." In nine books and counting, she has never once denied that it was accurate.
- Powered Armor: She owns a suit of it that is so heavily inlaid and decorated that Cain thinks it would make a Tech-Marine jealous. She tends to prefer more subtle equipment as a rule, but breaks it out when she expects high-intensity combat, such as when purging known Genestealer nests.
- Spy Catsuit: Amberley is frequently described as wearing a "bodyglove," which is exactly what it sounds like. Sometimes it's because it's the suit she wears to interface with her powered armor, but she's also got a red one which she wears in social situations.
- Team Mom: To her retinue. Although she's rather blunt and doesn't waste time grieving when one of her aides dies, she's clearly fond of them and seems to treat them as friends.
- Unreliable Narrator: More subtly than Cain, but you'd be just as wise taking anything she claims in her editorial notes with a pinch of salt.
- When She Smiles: She's charming enough in any case, but her laugh really turns it up.
- You Have Failed Me: At the end of Cain's Last Stand, Cain fears he will be on the receiving end of this after the Shadowlight falls into the hands of the Necrons, noting that whatever their relationship, Amberly is still an Inquisitor first and foremost, and he has technically failed in his assignment to keep the artefact out of enemy hands. Fortunately for him, Amberly concedes that while not ideal, the Shadowlight is safer in the hands of the Necrons than the forces of Chaos, and agrees with Cain's hypothesis that given how much effort they expended to recover it, the Necrons were clearly afraid of the Shadowlight's power, and thus likely have no plans to use it against the Imperium.
Amberley's savant, a sage enhanced with an augmetic implant that gives him access to an enormous amount of information and considerable mathematical and analytical skill. Unfortunately, this also makes him ramble compulsively as his mind forms peculiar attachments. A decent guy, despite being often annoying, and apparently very helpful when it comes to gambling.
- Artificial Limbs: Bionic legs in this case.
- Awesome by Analysis: Mott's nature as a Savant means that while he rambles excessively, he can be a massive help in certain situations. Of course, Cain fondly remembers the times that he and Mott decimate any card games with that same ability to count cards.
- Badass Grandpa: Caractacus is an elderly sage in a robe. He's also regularly running through firefights with apparently little to no body armor, without hesitation. However, he is a mostly artificial cyborg.
- Blessed with Suck: As a corollary to his Awesomeness by Analysis, Vail points out in one story that Mott can get so caught up in calculating the optimum trajectory that he's unable to actually fire the frakking gun.
- Cyborg: Mott is largely mechanical from the neck down. This gives him the speed and resilience implied above, as well as built-in skates.
- Deadpan SnarkerMott: Which reminds me, thank you for coming to our assistance. It was most timely.
Cain: My pleasure.
Mott: Then you have an extremely perverse idea of what constitutes fun. You should get out more.
- Expy: Of Gregor Eisenhorn's savant Uber Aemos. Mott is a bit more fortunate, though; he seems more just terribly fond of information rather than literally addicted, and his augmetics are of better quality.
- The Madness Place/Motor Mouth: Once Mott gets started rambling, it's very hard to stop him politely, since he has a compulsive need to keep working out his thoughts.
- No Social Skills: Unless he happens get sidetracked gushing about something he has an interest in and knows a great deal about (which is most things), Mott has a tendency to be blunt, abrasive, and to the point in conversation. Subtlety and tact are not his strengths.
- Sherlock Scan
Amberley's sanctioned psyker, Rakel is, by any conventional measure, quite insane. Although Amberley says she's not always that difficult (especially with the proper medication), Ciaphas is habitually wary of her, particularly since she tends to carry a laspistol. Rakel's reaction to Jurgen was how Amberley discovered the gunner was a blank.
- Big Eater: Apparently, being a powerful psyker takes a lot of calories.
- Innocent Fanservice Girl: Rakel's ignorance of, or contempt for, social norms includes wearing a dress that's rather too small for her. Although she's not a bad-looking woman, everyone else finds her madness too disturbing for it to be sexy.
- Jerkass: Not really her fault; she's just crazy and hard to be around.
- Mind Probe: Rakel's mostly used by Amberley as a living scrying device to find psychic phenomena. She's never demonstrated any active destructive powers on-screen.
- The Ophelia: She's a young, attractive woman who spends most of her time half-dressed and spouting what appears at first to be word salad — though there's often a meaning to her madness.
- Reckless Gun Usage: Who thought it was a good idea to give a clearly-unstable psyker a pistol? Granted, this is 40K, where half the setting revolves around giving clearly unstable people weapons and pointing them in the direction of whatever you want to die.
- Talkative Loon: Prone to babbling on about seemingly random or inconsequential things, though as she's a psyker they often actually make sense once others are aware of the context. Her reaction to Jurgen, for instance, is how Amberley discovered he is a blank.
- Telepathy: As a psyker, she's able to read people's minds. Cain finds this unsettling, for obvious reasons.
A former Commissar who went off the deep end, Amberley picked him up from a Penal Legion where he had been fitted with a combat drug injector.
- The Berserker: When his lasgun ran out of power he started using it as a bludgeon. Against Tyranids.
- Driven to Madness: While a Commissar, he succumbed to battle stress and ordered a squad executed for failing to salute a superior officer during an artillery barrage.
- How the Mighty Have Fallen: Cain's reaction to learning Simeon was a former Commissar.
- The Political Officer: Used to be his job.
A former member of the Adeptus Arbites, he was undercover in a cartel for so long his handlers thought he had gone over so they tried to pull him back in. Pelton, however, managed to cause the cartel to fracture under a civil war by a simple murder frame up. The Arbiters were going to execute him, but Amberley managed to attach him to her retinue.
- Cowboy Cop: Was ejected from the Arbites for disobeying orders and sparking a mob war that brought down a powerful cartel.
- In-Series Nickname: "Flicker".
- Screw the Rules, I'm Doing What's Right!: Instead of allowing himself to be brought in and let his work go to waste, he murdered a syndicate member and blamed another member for it. The resulting Mob Civil War brought down the entire syndicate. Cain didn't see the problem with that.
- Ship Tease: He and Zemelda seem to get some chemistry going in Duty Calls after the latter's recruitment.
A techpriest, Yanbel serves both the Omnissiah and the Inquisition.
A former fast-food worker on Periremunda who was caught in a genestealer assassination attempt on Cain, and actually managed to kill a few. Hired by Amberley, she soon showed that she was competent enough in a firefight, and also served to run errands for Amberley in her disguise.
- Dare to Be Badass: She's a fast-food worker who becomes an integral part of a veteran Inquisitor's personal retinue.
- Ship Tease: She and Pelton seem to get some chemistry going in Duty Calls after her recruitment into Amberley's retinue.
- Unusual Euphemism/Totally Radical: She likes to use Periremundean slang terms in conversation, all of which are incomprehensible to people not from Periremunda. Even Amberley never figured out half of what she was saying.
Imperial GuardMembers of the Imperial Guard outside of the Valhallans, including some of Cain's fellow Commissars.
Lieutenant (later Major) of the Valhallan 12th Artillery Regiment, and the closest thing Cain has ever had to the best friend. Overly aggressive and rash, but reliable and decent despite that. A big drinker and rumormonger, providing Cain with useful gossip, but also...well, let's face it, he's not very bright.
- Foil: Divas is very enthusiastic about engaging the enemy personally and thus hates the artillery because it shoots everything from miles away... which is why Cain joined it at the first place.
- Leeroy Jenkins: A big fan of charging the enemy head-on.
- Unwitting Instigator of Doom: He always finds some way to get Cain in trouble (accidentally getting him stuck on the wrong side of some doors or nearly getting him beaten to death by angry Tau sympathisers for example) without meaning to.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: Cain's best friend he may be, but that doesn't mean the descriptions of him are too flattering.
Lord General Zyvan
A Lord General of the Imperial Guard who oversaw operations in which the 597th served on Gravalax, Adumbria, and Periremunda, and also commanded the Guard on Quadravidia and Fecundia in The Greater Good. He appreciated Cain's tactical insight and highly regarded him.
- The Brigadier: Commands an Imperial Guard task force that, for a time, includes the Valhallan 597th. He often defers to Cain's judgment on important matters, and not merely because he's a Commissar; Zyvan seems to have a genuine appreciation for Cain's apparent talents.
- The Chains of Commanding: Cain often notes that he and Zyvan hit it off and became friends because Cain, being a commissar and thus not part of the normal Guard command structure, is the only person around whom Lord General can just be himself.
- A Father to His Men: Noted as having a genuine concern about the troops under his command.
- No Name Given: Zyvan's around for more than half the series but Ciaphas never does tell us what his first name is.
- Pragmatic Hero:
- In For the Emperor, the Tau Empire has an entrenched diplomatic presence and security forces on Gravalax and is making inroads with the populace. You'd expect a Lord General Militant of the Imperial Guard to want them gone at whatever cost, but Zyvan states point-blank during a briefing that the planet isn't worth getting into a shooting war with the xenos.
- In The Traitor's Hand, he chews out Tallarn 227th Colonel Asmar and Commissar Tomas Beije for excessive zeal, namely burning down a Slaaneshi cult site before it could be investigated for information about the cult's intentions.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: In contrast to the frequent portrayal of Imperial Guard flag officers as General Failures, Insane Admirals, and/or General Rippers, Zyvan pays close attention to his subordinates' input and makes an effort not to risk their lives needlessly.
- Smart People Play Chess: Subverted; despite his immense strategic skill, Cain always beats him in their Regicide games. Cain muses that Zyvan just can't properly shrink his focus to properly play such a simple game when he's used to dealing with the immense complexity of modern battlefields.
A fellow cadet at the Schola Progenium which Cain studied at. He is Commissar to the Tallarn 227th regiment. He and Cain are none too fond; Beije can't believe someone so flippant and blase as Cain could do half the things he has, while Cain considers Beije a sanctimonious Emperor-bother and a monumental pain in the ass.
- Cruel Mercy: After he finds himself being investigated on charges of gross incompetence for interfering with Cain's mission, Cain mentions that he intends to pull some strings to get Beije off the hook... in part because he knows that Beije will find being in Cain's debt absolutely intolerable.
- Didn't Think This Through: Deriding Kasteen as a "petticoat colonel" only to then realise he said that in front of a squad of extremely pissed off Valhallans from her regiment who are already looking for an excuse to shoot him.
- Knight Templar: He's the model of the strict, uncompromising "ideal" Commissar. This leads to the Lawful Stupid below.
- Laser-Guided Karma: His attempt to arrest Cain on charges of desertion and cowardice get him charged with gross incompetence for interfering with Cain's mission by the Commissariat tribunal he called to charge Cain (with the quite high probability of facing a firing squad). Cain said he'd pull a few strings to help him out.
- Genre Savvy: Not Beije himself, but Cain notes whoever assigned him to the Tallarn 229th was, making the good decision of placing Beije with a regiment of "Emperor-botherers as humourless as him" as opposed to another Guard regiment where Beije would have been a friendly fire incident just waiting to happen.
- Humiliation Conga: Dear God. First, he comes to arrest Cain for cowardice and desertion, only to find out Cain has his hands trying to prevent a daemonic summoning. Then a (male) cultist kisses him as he tries to interrogate him. Then it turns out Cain was right, and is perfectly willing to talk back to a Greater Daemon. Then Cain defeats the daemon (Beije getting attacked in the process), earning the admiration and respect of the Emperor-botherers Beije had brought with him, undermining his authority further. Then, once Cain is put on trial, the jury not only clears Cain of all charges, but starts looking into charges of incompetence for Beije. And when they're out of the courtroom, Cain reminds Beije that they still have a duel to fight (Beije having referred to Kasteen as a "petticoat colonel"), so Beije is forced to hastily apologize to her. And finally (assuming he wasn't executed or transferred elsewhere), the Tallarns he was with have started a splinter cult worshipping Cain as the Emperor's will made manifest.
- Lawful Stupid:
- Burned down a Chaos cult's ritual site before the Imperial Guard could investigate it and learn anything. Lord General Zyvan was not pleased.
- Also attempted to torture information out of a cultist. Someone who worships Slaanesh. The God of Pleasure. Whose followers take pleasure from doing literally anything, including having their own limbs chopped off. As is pointed out in the text, torturing masochists is at best counterproductive.
- My Eyes Are Up Here: Cain mentions this regarding Beije and Kasteen's first meeting, when Cain gleefully asks if Beije forgot to how to read shoulder insignias, he notes that given Kasteen's uniform really emphasises her figure, perhaps Beije didn't look that high.
- The Resenter: To Cain. And how. He's EXTREMELY jealous of Cain, because back at the Schola, Cain was... essentially, the same as he is now, but less restrained and probably still really getting around. Cain became a HERO OF THE IMPERIUM, being in frequent contact with a Lord General Militant, having constant praises and honors heaped on him, while by contrast Beije was stuck on Tallarn, with nowhere near a fraction of Cain's glory.
- The Rival: To Cain.
- Stay in the Kitchen: Like the regiment he serves with, Beije has somewhat conservative views about Guard regiments that include women. He practically blows up when he learns Kasteen is the 597th's CO.
The Commander of the Tallarn 227th. He's very uptight.
- Knight Templar: The Tallarn are a notoriously devout regiment, and Asmar is no exception.
- Lawful Stupid: See Beije's above mention for the info.
- Serious Business: Everything he does.
- Stay in the Kitchen: His attitude toward women is not very open, which is part of his problem with the Valhallan 597th.
Adeptus MechanicusMembers of the Adeptus Mechanicus that Cain has come across in his lifetime.
A member of the Mechanicus who was assigned to their end of the investigation into the theft of the Shadowlight.
- Cool Plane: Well, a Cool Ornithopter anyway.
An Adept on Simia Orichalcae, who was noted as being more reasonable in solving disputes, but also got quite distracted by the Necron tomb on the planet.
- Admiring the Abomination: Is thoroughly in awe of the Necron tomb. He is also quite fascinated by the ambulls (extremely violent apex predators not native to his planet).
- Didn't Think This Through: Went with a group of Mechanicus adepts to explore the Necron tomb, but they were all killed except for him.
- Driven to Madness: Between awe at the Necrons' superior technology and PTSD from his comrades' slaughter at their hands, he cracks noticeably, alternating between referring to them worshipfully and bloody-minded vengefulness.
- Machine Worship: He's a Mechanicus priest. It comes with the territory.
- Make It Look Like an Accident: Cain later regrets he didn't shoot Logash when they found him in the tomb before he could disseminate the tomb's location amongst his superiors in the Mechancius.
- Reassignment Backfire: Implied. After the events on Simia Orichalcae, Amberley explains that Logash goes onto an unspectacular career as a Magos assigned to the Noctis Labyrinth on Mars. That's the resting place of the Void Dragon, one of the C'Tan who the Necrons worshipped (and is all but stated to be the Machine God the Adeptus Mechanicus worship).
An adept on Perlia, who worked with Cain during his trek across the planet after being separated from his regiment in Death or Glory. She reappears in Cain's Last Stand as the Magos in charge of the Mechanicus research effort into the Shadowlight.
- Artificial Limbs: Has a mechandrite that looks exactly like a tail. According to Ciaphas, it is actually attached directly to her tailbone (and Amberly wonders precisely how he learned this).
- Big Eater: Compared to most techpriests who tend to regard food as simple fuel to be taken on when necessary and ignored the rest of the time. In Cain's Last Stand he notes that she still has a habit of frequently snacking on ration bars that she picked up during Death or Glory.
- Genki Girl: Highly unusual for the Mechanicus, who disdain emotions and try to rise above them. One of her teachers thought this would limit her prospects.
- I Was Quite a Looker: Unusually for this trope, we see Felicia both as a rather attractive young woman, and as a typically disturbing-looking tech-priestess as an older woman.
- Machine Worship: Downplayed, as she is noted to be more secular in her outlook than other tech-priests. She does however mourn the "death" of a servitor, and Cain suspects she never really forgave him for blowing up the Mechanicus Shrine Dam.
- Pet the Dog: Surprisingly serves as this for Jurgen. Thanks him and compliments his cooking, calls him a cog (Mechanicus compliment for an unnoticed part that helps the whole function), recognises him the better part of a century later... It's about the nicest anyone ever is to the poor guy, short of Cain himself.
- Prehensile Tail: Has a mechandrite attached to her tailbone.
- Rank Up: Made Magos between Death or Glory and Cain's Last Stand.
A renegade member of the Adeptus Mechanicus who stole the Shadowlight from Perlia with the help of Ernst Killian. He and Killian hoped to use the Shadowlight to awaken the psychic powers of humanity to battle Chaos.
A Magos supervising the archaeotech dig that turned into Cain's first encounter with Necrons, in "Echoes of the Tomb." Dies jumping in front of a gauss flayer to save Cain's life. The ironic coincidence of his name's with the villain from Duty Calls is never examined.
- Nice Guy: Once you get past his obsession with archaeotech, he's not really an unpleasant person, just a bit naive and pushy.
- One Steve Limit: There are two characters named Killian. Neither survive their introductions.
- Taking the Bullet: The gauss flayer blast.
- Too Dumb to Live: Fixed a Necron scout machine.
Senior Magos Biologis on Fecundia, engaged in research on the Tyranid hivemind.
- Dying as Yourself/"I Know You're in There Somewhere" Fight: Cain and the Reclaimers realize that Kildhar was infected by genestealers aboard the Spawn of Damnation, explaining her counterproductive actions through most of the book. Cain and Sholer present her with the evidence and after hitting her with the Armor-Piercing Question of when the last time she had herself fitted with new tech was, the genestealer takes over and Cain is forced to fatally shoot her. Her last words are that she was last upgraded 65 years ago, before the Spawn of Damnation, and to use her remains for research.
- For Science!: Entirely willing to toss caution (and what passes for ethics among the Mechanicus) to the wind and run a genestealer breeding program, something that visibly shocks even the deeply pragmatic (and pokerfaced) Tau emissary at first. In addition to that, her last words are a request to use her remains as research material rather than destroy them.
- Manchurian Agent: Was implanted by genestealers over 60 years ago. The broodmind never took direct control of her actions but has been subconsciously "nudging" her towards a disastrous course ever since.
The AdministratumMembers of the Administratum, the bureaucracy of the Imperium.
A scrivener who served on Simia Orichale, who was rather reasonable for an Adept of the Administratum.
A scrivener of the Administratum on Perlia, he helped managed the logistics of Cain's ragtag army cut off from the Imperial Guard.
The Administratum adept assigned as bursar to the Schola Cain teaches at in Cain's Last Stand.
- Obfuscating Stupidity: He's not nearly as hidebound and shortsighted as he may seem at first. He stocks ink just to fake the telltale-ink stains on his hands and clothes; he does all his work on a computer.
- Obstructive Bureaucrat: Subverted. He initially looks like one, but proves effective at working the bureaucracy to gather information and coordinate logistics.
- Opposites Attract: Has a secret romantic relationship with Sister Julien of all people.
Ernest Stavros Killian
A Radical Inquisitor who stole the Shadowlight from Perlia, using a group of Battle-Sisters.
- Big Bad: Of Duty Calls.
- Crazy-Prepared: Emphasis on "crazy". His escape plan should his enemies locate him was using a captive Tyranid Lictor to lure in a nearby Tyranid swarm to destroy the Adepta Sororitas convent he was using as his base of operations, trusting the aliens to erase all trace of his presence, and seemingly uncaring about the fact he would be providing the 'nids an all-you-can-eat buffet in the process.
- Cruel and Unusual Death: Exposed to the full fury of the Shadowlight's power outside of the psychic-dampening aura of Jurgen. According to Cain, Killian's corpse looks like "flesh and bone had melted together.
- Didn't Think This Through: In regards to his plans for the Shadowlight; Killian intended to use it to create an army of psykers to take the fight to the forces of Chaos on their own turf. A psyker who examined the Shadowlight later said that, had Killian carried out hisimbecilic scheme, the Shadowlight could well have destroyed the entire galaxy. Quite apart from the damage wreaked by these individual psykers, their very existence would have invited possession by daemons, and acted as a gateway allowing the forces of the Warp to flow freely into the Materium. This psyker soberly predicted that, in two generations, the Eye of Terror would expand and swallow the rest of the Galaxy.
- Evil Gloating: Is partial to this, which Cain exploits to play for time.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Thought Cain had some sort of device which cancelled the Shadowlight's abilities. In fact it was Jurgen, and the minute he got out of Jurgen's Anti-Magic field the Shadowlight came back on, killing him.
- Meaningful Name: His first and middle names are clearly a reference to James Bond's early nemesis Ernst Stavro Blofeld, and he has several traits of Bond villains.
- State Sec: He's an Inquisitor. Secretive and draconian measures to preserve the peace and root out Chaos and sedition come with the territory. Killian seems to have gone to particularly heinous extremes for even a Radical Inquisitor, however.
- We ARE Struggling Together: Explains, when asked why an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor sabotaged a project operated by the Ordo Xenos, that the internal workings of the Inquisition are far more fractious than the image they like to project to the rest of the Imperium.
- We Can Rule Together: To a degree; he shows the Shadowlight and explains his plans to Cain, hoping Cain's influence and support of his efforts will convince Killian's rivals in the Ordo Xenos to back off.
- Well-Intentioned Extremist: How Radical Xanthians are usually portrayed. Killian doesn't come off so well.
- Would Hurt a Child: Inferred: when his first facility on Pereimunda at the Hell's Edge mining colony came under attack from the Tyranids, the miners there tried to storm Killian's ship, hoping to get their children to safety. Killian ordered his Sororitas bodyguards to open fire on the crowd.
- You Have Outlived Your Usefulness: To the Sisters of Battle. He used them to raid the Perlia Mechanicus facility to recover the Shadowlight and protect his operation, but was quite happy to leave them to the mercy of the Tyranids to cover his own ass.
Adepta SororitasMembers of the Adepta Sororitas (namely, the Sisters of Battle, their Orders Militant) that Cain came across in his time during the Commissariat. Cain mostly feels them to be a collection of tactically useless Leeroy Jenkinses.
The Canoness of the Adepta Sororitas on Periremunda, she was used by Inquisitor Ernest Killian to retrieve the Shadowlight.
- The Atoner: For being led astray by Killian.
- Death Equals Redemption: After being led astray by Killian, she concludes that she and her order can only recieve absolution through dying against the tyranids.
- The Fundamentalist: As a Sister of Battle, extreme, unflinching devotion to the Emperor comes with the territory.
The Sister Superior of a squad of Celestians who Cain encountered during the Battle of Periremunda.
- The Atoner: For leaving the Emperor's Temple undefended.
- Death Equals Redemption: Saw fighting to the death against the tyranids as atonement for being led astray by Inquisitor Killian.
- Knight Templar: Was so carried away by bloodlust that Cain had to remind her that there were civilians in the Emperor's Temple who needed protection, pulling her back to reality.
Head of the Sororitas at Schola Progenium on Perlia Cain teaches at.
- Chainsaw Good: Naturally, she has a chainsword.
- It's Personal: With the Necrons, over Sanctuary 101.
- The Lad-ette/Stereotype Flip: And gets along with the "Emperor-botherer"-disliking Cain quite well because of it. This is a Sister of Battle who drinks, gambles proficiently, and is romantically involved with the schola's bursar.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: She's essentially Cain's Distaff Counterpart, appearing to be teaching her Sororitas initiates to value people, not just litanies.
The Reclaimers are a loyalist Adeptus Astartes chapter with close ties to the Adeptus Mechanicus. Cain was the Imperial Guard liaison officer to them during the Viridia and Serendipita campaigns (The Emperor's Finest), and they were later deployed along with the Swords of the Emperor chapter to relieve the Guard, including the two regiments that would later become the 597th Valhallan, on Corania (just prior to For the Emperor). A small detachment also made an appearance in The Greater Good.The Reclaimers are one of the Astartes Praeses, a group of twenty Space Marine chapters originally created to guard the Eye of Terror (seventeen remain, one having been destroyed and two others declared Excommunicate Traitoris). Their progenitor chapter is not stated, but organizationally they have similarities to the Iron Hands. As a whole they're one of the kindlier chapters but almost as tech-obsessed as the techpriests. Due to their ties to the Mechanicus they have better tech than usual for the space marines, as well as a higher-than-normal complement of Techmarines.
Leader of the Reclaimers expeditionary force dispatched to quell the rebellion on Viridia.
A senior Techmarine who sparred with Cain several times while the Revenant tracked the Spawn of Damnation. Crafted Cain's augmetic fingers.
- The Engineer: Comes with being a Tech-Marine. He was in fact the one who manufactured Cain's augmentics to replace the fingers he lost to a Portal Cut.
- Nice Guy: The other Reclaimers, while courteous to Cain, are still somewhat aloof. Drumon is much friendlier and Cain considered their sparring sessions one of the highlights of his time aboard the Revenant.
- Put on a Bus: Or rather Put On A Space Hulk. Volunteered to remain behind on the Spawn of Damnation as it returned to the Warp at some point after the events of "The Emperor's Finest" and hasn't rejoined the Chapter as of The Greater Good, set 65 years after The Emperor's Finest. Given what tends to happen to those who spend too long in the warp, it might count as a Bus Crash.
- Sword and Gun: Plasma pistol and power sword. Outright compared to Cain's own (less powerful but similar in function) favoured weapons.
A senior Apothecary. First encountered in The Emperor's Finest, where he is the one to attach Cain's augmetic fingers, then returns in The Greater Good as part of a joint Reclaimers/Mechanicus research project.
- Everyone Has Standards: While a bit too excited at the prospect of studying live Tyranids, he absolutely refuses to go with Kildhar's plan of allowing recently captured gaunts to join the ones they already had. When Kildhar does this without informing him or Cain, he hits the button to close the gate so hard he breaks it.
- Nice Guy: Like Drumon, he comes across as a lot more personable than most Astartes.
- For Science!: Like his Mechanicus counterpart, he is a bit too excited about the potential revelations to fully consider the risk inherent in experimenting on live Tyranids.
- Unluckily Lucky: Serendipity bordering on Jinxie Penlan-grade in The Greater Good. Bad news: In attempting to re-close a gate keeping two groups of tyranids from joining up, he mashes the button so hard he accidentally breaks the control panel and freezes the gate half-open. Good news: the two groups of tyranids start killing each other, leading to the ultimately plot-solving discovery that different tyranid broods hate each other.
The Tau EmpireA federation of a half-dozen alien species on the Eastern Fringe of the Imperium of Man, the Tau Empire arrived on the galactic stage relatively recently. Spared by a warp storm from Imperial extermination in the 36th Millennium, the tau began annexing Imperial planets in the Damocles Gulf (where the Cain novels take place) in the 8th century M41. The Imperium retaliated, launching the Damocles Gulf Crusade to reclaim its lost territory and wipe out the xenos, but quickly found that the tau, in Cain's words, "know how to put on a good war."In the wake of the Crusade, for the next 200 years until the series the Tau Empire has maintained hostilities with the much larger Imperium at the level of a Space Cold War: duking it out over the odd planet here and there but never committing to full-scale war because neither side can afford it:
- If humanity brought all its force to bear on the tau, the tau would lose, guaranteed, but the force required would allow threats elsewhere in the galaxy to gain a foothold.
- Conversely the tau can't antagonize the Imperium too much or else the humans might take the risk and worry about the cleanup later.
A tau diplomat and a member of the Water Caste, he serves as ambassador to the Imperium in For the Emperor and The Greater Good.
- Cool Old Guy: It's not clear exactly how old he is, but his appearances are 61 years apart in-universe and Tau consider 40 retirement age.
- Limited Advancement Opportunities: Under tau Fantastic Naming Conventions the "El'" part of his name denotes his rank in the Water Caste. He hasn't gotten a promotion in 61 years. That said, it is the second-highest rank a tau can achieve, and few ever get as far as he has.
- Odd Friendship: Cain saved his life back in For the Emperor. Sixty-one years and eight books later in The Greater Good, he seeks out Cain as his opposite number in the face of Hive Fleet Kraken's invasion, and the two strike up something of a friendship.
- Only Known by Their Nickname: He's mostly known as El'hassai (a shortened form of his formal name containing his rank and a defining trait that is left untranslated). The "Por" for his affiliation with the Water Caste is only added once and his home sept is never identified.
- Put on a Bus/The Bus Came Back: After the events on Gravalax the tau withdraw from the planet, El'hassai included. He doesn't return until The Greater Good, sixty-one years and eight books later.
ChaosWorshipers and agents of the Ruinous Powers whom Cain has encountered over the course of his lengthy career.
Once a mortal sorceress and Slaaneshi cultist slain by Cain after she tried to sacrifice him in a ritual, Emeli was rewarded by her Daemon Prince with transformation into a daemon of Slaanesh. She serves as the main villain of Traitor's Hand, in which she tries to pull an entire planet into the Warp.
- Archenemy: Most of Cain's enemies don't survive their first encounter with him. Emeli's attacked him twice and is still out there, plotting a third go. Given the nightmares that Cain still has about her, it's safe to say the loathing is mutual.
- Axe Crazy: Par for the course for Slaaneshi cultists and daemons alike.
- Beware the Silly Ones: Talks like a giggly schoolgirl. Probably the most flat out powerful adversary Cain ever encounters.
- Big Bad: Of Traitor's Hand.
- Bond One-Liner: Cain right before shooting her the first time around (and note that the short story is set before he meets Amberley Vail):"Sorry, I prefer blondes."
- Came Back Strong: Returned from the dead as a daemon with far more power than she'd possessed previously.
- Dark Action Girl: As a daemon she casually tears apart several Khornate Berzerkers from the World Eaters Legion. Only Jurgen's presence prevents her from doing the same to Cain.
- David vs. Goliath: Very much the Goliath to Cain's David. As a very powerful daemon, Emeli is leagues beyond not only Cain, but everyone else he's a ever fought.
- Demon Lords and Archdevils: The kind of daemon that Emeli has become is never specified, but given that she's able to paralyze a room full of people, shred a pair of Berzerkers, and threaten to pull an entire planet into the Warp, she's well on her way to being a Greater Daemon if she isn't one already.
- Faux Affably Evil: Emeli's cheerful attitude does nothing to hide just how deadly dangerous she is.
- Green Eyes: Her most noticeable feature as a human, and the one she retains as a daemon.
- Interplay of Sex and Violence: At the core of her character.
- It's Personal: For both her and Cain.
- Lust: Her primary sin, and one which she magically evokes in others.
- Psychic Powers: A very powerful witch and psychic when alive, she has gained even more power over the Warp since her "death".
- Revenge: Ropes Cain into her resurrection plot so she can avenge her first defeat.
- Revenge Before Reason: If Emeli had left Cain alone she probably could have successfully pulled the planet into the Warp. Instead she deliberately incorporated him into her plans, ensuring her own defeat.
- Smug Snake: Incredibly sure of herself and prone to toying with her victims.
- Verbal Tic: Describing someone as "silly".
- Villainous Crush: Tries to seduce Cain twice over, once when mortal, and once as a daemon.
- Was Once a Man: Was once a mortal psyker.
Varan the Undefeatable
A powerful and "self-styled invincible" Chaos warlord with the power to mentally dominate and subvert others through a Compelling Voice, Varan led a splinter force of the Thirteenth Black Crusade against Perlia to capture the Shadowlight artifact held there. He serves as the main villain of Cain's Last Stand.
- Big Bad: Of Cain's Last Stand, though in the Black Crusade as a whole he's a nobody.
- Compelling Voice: His psyker power allows him to turn anyone within ranger of his voice into a mindless puppet follower. It doesn't have any range limitation — he packs a stadium full of prisoners at one point to control them all en masse — but it only works live, not through broadcast.
- Disney Villain Death: Falls to his death over the edge of the dam at the end of his duel with Cain ( helped along by a kick up the arse from Cain).
- Famous Last Words: Originally reported as "Well, that was unexpected..." when he was first introduced in a chapter header quote in an earlier book. It's subject to a little bit of in-universe Beam Me Up, Scotty! (possibly intentional on Cain's part), as his actual last words are more like "That was unexpected, wasn't it?" and the actual quote comes before he realizes he's doomed.
- Large Ham: As is natural for someone who uses his voice for Mind Control. His actual speeches are apparently fairly uninspiring.
- Let's Get Dangerous!: He's initially presented as a Squishy Wizard who uses his voice-activated powers to make up for his lack of combat prowess. During his parley-turned-duel with Cain, he reveals that he also has daemonic talons.
- The Magnificent: Varan the Undefeatable.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: Of Adolf Hitler — a small, unimposing man with a weedy little moustache who makes trite speeches that nevertheless inspire mobs of fanatic followers. Of course, the real Hitler never had Psychic Powers (that we know of).
- Tempting Fate: Calling himself "the Undefeatable" like that was simply asking for someone to take him down a peg, a fate that Cain gladly delivers with a boot to the ass.
- Villainous Breakdown: Completely loses it when Cain goes off-script from what Varan had in mind, proving resistant to his mind control thanks to Jurgen, and then insulting the Warmaster on live television (Varan having insisted on the cameras for his forces) by remarking he's ready to accept Varan's surrender.