Deadpan Snarker - Television Tropes & Idioms

Kyon of The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi fits this perfectly, as well as being the main character and the narrator. We aren't always sure if he's keeping a running commentary in his head or saying it out loud. However, it is clear that Haruhi, whether by her own powers or because he is oblivious to his own outloud comments, frequently answers him in turn.
Norway from Axis Powers Hetalia. Whenever speaking with Denmark, he'll fit in as many insults as possible, but with his emotionless attitude and Denmark's obliviousness, they don't really get through.
Gourry in the original Slayers novels. With a healthy dose of Obfuscating Stupidity as well.
- Applies more to Zelgadis in the anime. Gourry is deadpan, but that's usually because he's serious and there's no hint of snark.
Karneval 's worst offenders are Gareki and Hirato, but Tsukumo can start drilling it into cheerful Yogi's skull when he starts irritating or astounding her with his quirky actions
Kanon 2006 has Yuuichi Aizawa (who at one point is asked "who are you talking to?" after delivering a line with his back to the camera as a Continuity Nod). Though many comparisions are made between Kyon and Yuuichi, especially because of a few similarities in appearance and having the same seiyuu, both characters are vastly different. Whereas Kyon makes such comments to himself, or intends only himself to hear, since he is usually bored or silently shocked at the "stupidity" around him, Yuuichi openly states such comments to tease his friends. Yuuichi's snarky commentary usually translates into good-natured fun and flirting rather than disdainful commentary.
Yukito from AIR also demonstrates snarkiness but it may just be that since he is quite mature, his attitude of common sense and practicality contrasts even more when he is surrounded by childish females.
Tomoya Okazaki of CLANNAD likes playing pranks on anyone gullible enough to fall for them (Sunohara in particular - it's implied he does it just to see if he'll fall for them). He does this with a completely straight face, which makes it all the funnier. However, he seems to make such comments aloud only to mock others, once again differentiating himself from other Kyo Ani leads. He's not above making wry comments either:
Sunohara: When the time comes, Okazaki, I trust you to watch my back.
Okazaki: (Enthusiastically) Lucky! I'll be sure to stab you well.
Misaki Matsuya in the manga version of Excel Saga; Excel herself also shows signs of this trope.
Despite being one of the two leads, Duzell in the manga Vampire Game exemplifies this trope.
Shikamaru on Naruto is another character that started out as a Deadpan Snarker but developed into leadership roles. Thanks to his genius-level strategic thinking, he became the first of the Rookie 9 to receive the title of Chuunin. He stills speaks in deadpan though, and can be pretty snarky, even after the 2 1/2 year timeskip. In terms of adults, Kakashi Hatake is a good example, sheerly for the fact that he is so constantly deadpan it's questionable as to whether he's a this or an Unfunny.
Kakashi: Naruto, you can't kill the client. That's not how it works.
- It's explained in the guide that Kakashi used to be hyper-critical of people he thought weren't performing up to snuff. After "seeing the light", deadpan is probably his only means of suppressing those old habits.
- Tenten has shades of this too, but since a good 95% percent of her already barely noticable screen time is Filler, her snarkyness is blink-and-you'll-miss-it.
Caren in Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch, until she joins up with Lucia for good.
Hiroyuki Fujita, the main character, from To Heart seems to fit in this category, although it seems to be a result of his laziness and the fact that he wants to "eat, play arcade games, and sleep the rest his life away". Despite his dry attitude, laziness, and tendency to tease girls who annoy him at times, he shows his sympathy through his actions rather than his words, no matter who it is.
Nagase: In any case, if she does come out, we'll have to do something.
Lemmy: Okay! The Astral Busters are on the job, right?
Hiroyuki: Why do you have to attack her? When she appears we're going to talk to her.
Lemmy: Is that so?
Hiroyuki: Were you even listening to us before?
Domeki in xxxHoLic, who seems to have the unusual ability to always maintain a deadpan and monotone expression no matter what happens in order to add to his snarking ability.
- Unless, that is, Watanuki is actually being serious and introspective, at which point he can't think of anything to say. Such as when Watanuki stupidly trades his eye away to help him or announces that he is taking of the shop until Yuuko (presumed dead, but there's reincarnation and stuff) returns.
Okara from Samurai 7.
Terriermon from Digimon fits this trope, but in Digimon Tamers, like whoa.
Jin from Samurai Champloo.
Spike Spiegel from Cowboy Bebop is an unusual example in that he is a Deadpan Snarker given the role of the main character of an action show and is a defining Badass in anime.
- He retains his hero status despite his snark because Faye fits the role of Lancer in most episodes.
Kurama and Hiei in Yu Yu Hakusho, with Hiei being an out-and-out jerk and Kurama being a bit more subtle. They're at their best when they're snarking at each other.
- In the manga-only ending, when Kurama is mistaken for a female several times, then asked to help with a case at an all girls' school, and he asks if he need to do something as a disguise (Yusuke was already snuck in once) or just go as is, Keiko remarking to Yusuke about how scary Kurama was. Note that each time you can't see his face, making the mood even weirder.
Ruri Hoshino of Martian Successor Nadesico does this so often that she, just like the examples in Western Animation and Live Action TV below, ~~has a trope named after her because of it~~ used to have a trope named after her.
Tsuyuri from Doujin Work keeps a straight face while saying the most outrageous things, mostly to pit other characters against each other and see what comes forth out of all the confusion she causes.
Alice from ARIA tends to fulfil this role, especially in the first season.
Ryoma Echizen from The Prince Of Tennis is a pre-teen version of this (and arguably, one of the few male examples of Little Miss Snarker). Sadaharu Inui also exhibits Deadpan Snarker traits sometimes.
C.C. from Code Geass. Her caustic remarks are about the only thing which can rein in Lelouch's overinflated ego.
Magari Kazuma: model student, all-around athlete, Student Council President, surrounded by freaking idiots.
Riza Hawkeye in Fullmetal Alchemist. A high-ranking aide to Roy Mustang, she acts as both his conscience and the voice of reason on his staff, despite sometimes seeming to exist only to keep the other characters (including Mustang) in line and point out their shortcomings.
- She does snark in the manga, but always politely.
Akira Takano from School Rumble tends to be the voice of reason among her girl squad (with Tenma, Eri and Mikoto), and is able to make astute observations about the romantic hijinks of her friends while keeping a straight face the whole time.
Conan Edogawa and Ai Haibara from Detective Conan. Does APTX-4869 always make Teen Geniuses to act like this?
Sven from Black Cat is the Deadpan Snarker in Train's group.
Fujioka Haruhi from Ouran High School Host Club is a magnificently brutal snarker, especially where Tamaki is concerned.
- It helps that she often doesn't seem to realize that the things she says tend to hurt people's feelings. It also helps that she's apparently unaware of how fond the rest of the host club are of her.
Chisame of Mahou Sensei Negima acts like this a lot, as she's one of the only girls in her class who lacks a Weirdness Censor.
Kiyomaro Takamine tends to fill this role often in Gash Bell due to his genius and the outright oddity of other characters' plans (usually Folgore's) that somehow work.
Arguably, the (almost) eternally-deadpan Kobushi Abiru of Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei. She usually wears a totally neutral, bored expression on her face (or as much of it as can be seen under the bandages), occasionally uttering a cutting line to another of the students in her class while they're talking about something. In chapter 19 of the manga (volume 2 in tankobon), when Kotonon the heavily-photoshopped net idol is outraged over being called a fat-ass and nobody-has-ever-been-so-mean-as-to-call-me-that, Abiru quips "What? Not even once?" with a perfectly straight face (and even tone of voice in the anime, IIRC). Many of her lines can be interpreted as being snarky; occasionally Nozomu-sensei receives some of this snark too, though more recent episodes have depicted Abiru to be more often smitten with him.
In his image song, Keiichi from Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni plays this role. In the actual series, he's more of a comedy person than a Deadpan Snarker.
- Rika plays the role in the series, when her persona isn't showing.
Fran from Katekyo Hitman Reborn. It's even funnier since his teammates are all complete Snark Bait. He's also Genre Savvy.
Although in the first season of Princess Tutu Fakir was much more of a Jerk Ass, in the second season he calmed down a bit and started to swing into this trope.
Ahiru: Good morning, Fakir! You're up early!
Fakir: Early for you, anyway.
Misaki Matsuya from Excel Saga manga is a powerful example. Once she renders Iwata and Watanabe into howling fits of laughter with a single deadpan sentence. It's made pretty clear that under her stoic exterior lies the heart of a master humorist. Unfortunately her anime counterpart didn't get a single chance to test her skills in this field.
The manga version of Ranma from Ranma 1/2 is a Deadpan Snarker; Anime incarnation is not really one. Nabiki from the same series has her moments, though it is a much larger trait for her in Fanon than Canon and in the anime than the manga.

Alfred Pennyworth, in various incarnations of Batman, constantly makes ironic (but highly polite and proper) comments on Master Bruce's lifestyle.
Batman: Jim will pull through!
Alfred: Or what, master Bruce? You'll dress up like a giant bat and haunt the night for the rest of your life?
- And whenever Batman (in any incarnation) isn't either moping around in Wangst or being the Unfunny, he's generally the one with a deadpan line.
  - Or, as Jaime Reyes (Blue Beetle III) put it, "Batman's actually pretty funny, in a scary kinda way."
  - Typically, Batman needs Superman as a foil if he's going to be funny.
  - The Robins (most of them) tend to pick up the slack as far as snark goes.
Hellboy often uses deadpan. His Catch Phrase "Ah, Crap," can be said to be an example, as is his habit of yelling "BOOM!" when he punches someone with the Right Hand of Doom.
Elaine Belloc from Lucifer has occasional moments of deadpan snarking, most notably when she sat at the table with Archangel Michael, Lucifer and Destiny of the Endless debating heatedly. Her comment was: "Another glass of testosterone, anyone?"
Atticus Pix from Ministry.
Everyone in Runaways is this at one point or another, but the most straightforward example is Gert. Nico takes on this role as well.
Just about every character who isn't Ax Crazy (or The Voiceless) in Sin City.
Spider-Man embodies this trope to the point of deserving to have it named after him.
Most of the characters in the comic book prequel to Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic have their moments, but the absolute king of snark is unquestionably Gryph. The title of Prince would probably go to Zayne.
Gryph: (upon being levitated by Zayne) I seem to have lost weight.
(reading the news report on Zayne's escape:)
Gryph: "... Failed Padawan..." "... Slew classmates..." "Fugitive is armed and..." Umm...
Zayne: Dangerous?
Gryph: No. "Deranged." Well, that certainly sounds like you.
- Similarly, the bulk of the characters in Star Wars: Rebellion volume 2: The Ahakista Gambit have one or two smart remarks, but Baco Par, the Snarky Non Human Side Kick is notable int that he barely has ten lines which aren't snarky.
  (while the party is walking through some underground tunnels)
  Baco: There's things living down here, aren't there? Terrible scary things with very sharp teeth? And monstrously bad breath... very, very warm bad breath... that tickles the back of your neck when one is right behind you.
  (Baco ducks, and the monster jumps over him and attacks Wyl Tarson, only to be shot by Laynara)
  Laynara: I hate bad breath.
  (another time, the team is waiting for a saboteur to deactivate a force field protecting the communications center they're trying to break into...)
  Baco: Wow ... I never thought there'd be so much sitting around on a suicide mission.
  Wyl: If you'd like to volunteer to test that energy barrier, then by all means. I could be a fake, you know.
  Baco: (pointing to a skeleton lying just in front of the force field) No, that's fine. He covered it.
- Based on C-3PO's reactions to some of the things he says, if his speech were translated, R2-D2 would be a definite Deadpan Snarker who speaks in robot noises.
Every single member of the Young Avengers displays this to some extent. They beat up about one enemy for every ten lines of snarky dialogue and Witty Banter.
Black Bolt from the Marvel Comics Inhumans is The Voiceless; if he were but to whisper, it would unleash a shockwave strong enough to destroy a city. Despite this, he's constantly thinking such lines. During his time with the Illuminati, fellow member Charles Xavier doubles as a translator. Also, when he ewants to declare war, well, he doesn't beat around the bush: he declares "War."
- The Illuminati part have a very funny part were Black Bolt commits his wife (who speaks for him) never lets him get in a word
Everyone says lines like that in any book involving Deadpool.
Sonic is incredibly snarky in his comic series. During one battle with the near omnipotent Enerjak, Sonic makes several puns on the name. When Enerjak immobilizes him with chaos energy and asks if he's quite finished with the witty remarks, Sonic makes seven or eight more cracks in rapid succession, before Enerjak hurls him through a wall.
Why has no-one mentioned the X Men? Gambit (to name just one) is the absolute King of this trope. Every other sentence that comes out of his mouth is a snark. And you can never tell when he means it.....
In any comic book written by Peter David, the majority of the cast will be snarkers.
In Sally Forth (Wood): two specialists are Wild Bill Yonder and Q. P. Dahl.

Almost everybody is this in Aeon Natum Engel, even Rei.
In DC Nation, Green Shield and Caleb Zukov take snark to the level of art form - usually at the other's expense.

Every character (if you count them as more than one) played by Groucho Marx.
- Groucho Marx. Snarker. Deadpan? Hmmm...
Pretty much any character ever played by David Spade.
Hobson, from Juno, is the quintessential example, though the whole movie is rife with it.
Willy Wonka, as portrayed by Gene Wilder in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, had elements of this character. The most notable was whenever someone demanded he "do something"; his response was a monotone: "Help. Police. Murder."
- Johnny Depp's version also has a few moments like that, as well as Veruca Salt.
Riley Poole in National Treasure.
Almost all of the main characters of Sin City.
Hedwig from Hedwig and the Angry Inch.
Margo in All About Eve.
- "Fasten your seatbelts, everybody, it's going to be a bumpy night!"
  - Addison perhaps even more so. Come on, he has "wit" in his last name!
Any given film noir hero. Sam Spade is probably the snarkiest of the lot, but J.J. Gittes of Chinatown gets one or two good ones.
Loach: What happened to your nose, Gittes? Somebody slammed a bedroom window on it?
Gittes: Nope. Your wife got excited. She crossed her legs a little too quick.
Scarecrow in Batman Begins:
Rachel: You don't think a man who butchers people for the mob belongs in prison?
Scarecrow: Well, I would hardly have testified to that otherwise.
- And in the sequel:
  Batman: I don't need help!
  Scarecrow: (tied up) Not my diagnosis.
Waldo Lydecker from the classic murder mystery Laura. "You fail to understand that you're interrupting something far more important than your career. My lunch."
Chevy Chase played a lot of these characters, but chief amongst them has to be Irwin "Fletch" Fletcher in his adaptations of the Fletch novels, and his particularly dry deadpan snark:
Corrupt Police Chief: Maybe I'm gonna blow your brains out!
Fletch: Now, I'm no lawyer, but I do believe that's a violation of my rights.
Phil Conners from Groundhog Day starts out as one, but Character Development leaves him more empathic as the film goes on.
- Any given Bill Murray film fits the bill, such as Quick Change, Caddyshack, Ghostbusters... the list goes on and on and on.
Peter Dinklage as Trumpkin in Prince Caspian fulfills this role beautifully, pointing out just how ridiculously most of the other characters are behaving, and generally saying what audience members are thinking.
- Skandar Keynes as Edmund has traits of this, as well.
Grave-Robber has some moments of this in Repo! The Genetic Opera.
Hellboy's father, Trevor Bruttenholm, seemed this way at times. Searching for Nazis on a "deserted" island, he's told, "There's nothing on this island but rocks and sheep." When they find the Nazis, he looks at the officer in charge: "They must be here for the sheep."
- Another Hellboy character comes to mind.
Klaus has this role in The Movie of A Series Of Unfortunate Events.
Klaus: Does it strike you as odd that none of our relatives are related to us?
- Sunny too, on occasion, made all the funnier in that she speaks all in baby talk, with the meaning given in subtitles.
Alan Rickman in most of his roles, particularly Galaxy Quest and Dogma.
- Don't forget the Harry Potter films. And for that matter, the books—he was cheated out of a Crowning Moment Of Awesome when the script writers chose to leave out of Goblet of Fire the scene where he read the 'Witch Weekly' article about how Hermione was supposedly cheating on Harry with Viktor Krum. The best line? Envision Rickman, as Snape, saying the following: "Miss Granger has developed a taste for famous wizards which Potter alone cannot ... satisfy."
- Harry himself has elements of this in Half-Blood Prince.
  Dumbledore: I expect you're wondering why we're here.
  Harry: Actually sir, after all these years, I sort-of just go with it.
Marvin from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. If not for his programmed personality, he'd be pretty bad-ass.
Manny in Ice Age and Ice Age 2.
- So is Diego in both movies.
Anakin Skywalker in Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith. When Obi-Wan points out the inadvisability of trying to clear pesky droids off his fighter's wing by shooting at them: "I agree, bad idea." (And then he does it.) When asked if he can fly the Invisible Hand as it's falling toward Coruscant's surface: "Under the circumstances I'd say the ability to fly this thing is irrelevant." (And then he does it. Kind of.)
- The student is nothing when compared to the master. In Episode II, he muses in a dogfight, "This is why I hate flying." When Anakin is worried about Padme, Obi-Wan draws his attention to the fact that she's freed herself and has climbed to the top of her pillar: "She seems to be on top of things." In Episode III, when the Invisible Hand begins to fragment: "Not to worry, we are still flying half a ship." And when they finally crash-land "Another happy landing." And, of course, after he takes out General Grievous with precision blaster-fire Obi-Wan discards the blaster saying "So uncivilized."
  - This was a reference to his earlier (later?) line in Episode IV about the lightsaber being 'elegant weapon, of a more civilized age' and being 'not as clumsy or random as a blaster'.
- Also in the arena:
  Anakin: We relayed your message just like you requested, Master. Then we decided to come and rescue you.
  Obi-Wan: (glancing at his handcuffs and chain) Good job.
  - That actor's good at that: "Heroin makes you constipated. My last hit was wearing off, and the suppositories had yet to melt." AAUUGH! "I'm no longer constipated"
- Failing hyperdrive + Princess Leia = instant snark. Actually, a lot more situations than that. Apparently, she gets it from her father.
Harold from The Boys in the Band.
Randal Graves is this mixed with a generous helping of Jerkass.
Many characters in '30s and '40s screwball comedies, such as those played by Cary Grant, fit this trope.
Jiji in Kikis Delivery Service. He was voiced by the late, great Phil Hartman in his last film role.
In the new Star Trek movie, Captain Kirk fills this role for all its hammy worth. Bones McCoy also gets a few one-liners in to boot.
Boris Yellnikoff from Whatever Works.
Mittens the cat from Bolt. It helps that her voice is done by Sussie Essman from Curb Your Enthusiasm.
- I don't think I'd call Susie Green deadpan.
Many of the characters in the film The Incredibles fill this role, specifically the Supers.
Elastigirl: I think... your father is in trouble.
Violet: If you haven't noticed, Mom, we're not doing so hot either.
Many characters played by actress Zooey Deschanel, such as in Almost Famous, Big Trouble, The Good Girl, Elf, and slightly in 500 Days of Summer.
- And we love her for it! In some movies, you almost wanna make out with her every time she opens her mouth!
Alicia Witt is also good at this. Hell, her last name is Witt!
Ditto Judy Greer. Hmm, now there's a three way for you!
Mr. Palmer from the 1995 Sense and Sensibility. An intolerable chick-flick through and through, the film does give gruntled husbands relief in the form of Mr. Palmer. Look at this. Some of his most memorable lines: Deadpan snarking.
Mrs. Palmer: [talking to someone else] If only he'd gone to Combe Magna. We live but half a mile away.
Mr. Palmer: Five and a half.
Mrs. Palmer: I cannot believe it is that far. I can't believe it.
Mr. Palmer: Try.
- Hugh Laurie probably learned it from his butler in a TV show: Stephen Fry.
- Sadly, some of those comments are directed at his wife.
In Astro Boy 2009, Dr. Elefun tends to drop into this mode whenever he shares screen time with Stone.
"HAHA oh you're not joking."
Quite a few characters from Indiana Jones, most notable among them being Jones himself and his father. It helps that Jones Sr. is played by Sean Connery.
Henry Jones Sr.: Nice landing.

Elizabeth Bennett of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice: "I give you leave to like him. You have liked many a stupider person."
- She gets it from her father.
- Let's not forget that Mr. Darcy is himself quite the Deadpan Snarker. How else do you think he and Elizabeth are able to live with each other?
- Heck... most of Jane Austen's heroines have a streak of this. See Emma Woodhouse, Marianne and Elanor Dashwood, etc.
Vlad, Kragar, and Loiosh from Steven Brust's Taltos series all fit this one.
Mephistopheles in Steven Brust's To Reign In Hell.
Most characters in Jim Butcher'sThe Dresden Files do this at least occasionally. Michael and Mab are probably the only two recurring characters who do not regularly do it (even Nicodemus has his moments).
- Harry, when asked who the hell he is, answering with "I the hell am Harry."
- Bob and Thomas both seem to rather enjoy the snark.
Butcher seems to love snark in general; though there's much less of it than in Dresden, there's still quite a bit of it flying around in the Codex Alera series. Most characters get their moment to shine, but the most persistent example is Doroga.
In David Eddings' Belgariad and Malloreon, it'd almost be easier to list every major character who isn't either a Card Carrying Villain or a Deadpan Snarker. Even the Voice of the Prophecy (the speaking aspect of the cosmic force attempting to restore the universe to its original destiny) snarks it up almost every time it communicates with one of the characters.
Eustace from The Chronicles of Narnia, with his "habit of being dreadfully matter-of-fact."
- Edmund too, who after the first book switches from caustic Jerk Ass to lovable Deadpan Snarker.
- Reepicheep fits both in the books:
  Caspian: There are some things no man can face.
  Reepicheep: It is then my good fortune not to be a man.
- ... and in the films (played by Eddie Izzard, So Yeah):
  Caspian: Y-you are a mouse.
  Reepicheep: I was hoping for something a little more original.
The title character of George R. R. Martin's Tuf Voyaging really has no emotions except for sarcasm, but he disguises it with enough Spock Speak that many of his interlocutors never realize that they've been insulted.
Also from George R. R. Martin, Tyrion and Jaime Lannister from A Song of Ice and Fire fit the trope, but both are dwarfed (no pun intended) by Dolorous Edd. Still, practically all characters get a snappy line.
Despite having a different trope named for him, Eeyore in A. A. Milne's original Winnie the Pooh books is very much a Deadpan Snarker; only his Disney-fied film version is the sort of lovable depressive that can grace so many pastel-colored sweatshirts.
In Terry Pratchett's Discworld:
- Samuel Vimes and Esmerelda Weatherwax, both of which are particularly Genre Savvy (and hate having to be).
- Lord Vetinari's snark is rumored to be so caustic that Sgt. Colon lives in fear of the patrician getting sardonic on him. (Although when it did happen, he never even noticed. Subtle and clever verbal abuse is wasted on some people.)
- Also, um, aren't we forgetting Terry Pratchett himself?
- Rincewind also has his moments; having long given up trying to use his Genre Savviness to stay out of dangerous situations, he occasionally uses it to be sarcastic about them.
- Every line uttered by Salzalla in Maskerade drips with sarcasm, at least before he is revealed as the villain, and rapidly loses the plot. For instance, suggesting to Mr Bucket that if the ballerinas did more leaps, it might save on wear and tear on ballet shoes:
  "Well, their feet wouldn't be on the ground for so long, would they?" said Salzella, in the tones of one who knows for a fact that he's much more intelligent than anyone else in the room.
Snape from JK Rowling's Harry Potter. His response when Dumbledore orders him to kill him:
"Would you like me to do it now?" asked Snape, his voice heavy with irony. "Or would you like a few moments to compose an epitaph?"
- For that matter, Harry himself tends to cold, literalist sarcasm. From the fifth book:
  Draco: You're dead, Potter.
  Harry: Funny, you'd think I'd have stopped walking around...
- Ron can also be interpreted this way.
  - Interpreted, nothing. "Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?" anyone?
- JK Rowling herself, especially when responding to some of the more bizarre speculation about the books or her personal life:
  Book Six is called 'The Toenail of Icklibõgg' — Well, if you believed the '[Pillar of] Storgé' one...
  - She later admitted she made up the "Toenail of Icklibõgg" rumor (the "Pillar of Storgé" one, however? 100% real).
  - Responding on her website to whether the seventh book would be called "Harry Potter and the Pyramids of Furmat", Rowling wrote "The Pyramids of Furmat lie a few miles east of the famous Fortress of Shadows, not far from the magnificent Pillar of Storgé. Many tourists prefer to view these ancient monuments at night, when they are illuminated by the Green Flame Torch." (Those are all previously rumored titles.)
Marco from Animorphs.
- Tobias, too. Occasionally even Ax, although it's not always clear whether it's intentional at first, examples in later books have to be intentional.
- Second to last book, after the Yeerks have realized that they're mostly fighting human kids, and not alien warriors.
  Random Mook: "Andalite!"
  Ax: < Surprise. >
In The Malazan Book of the Fallen Udinaas, Samar Dev, Bugg and Fiddler are all deadpan snarkers to some degree.
The Russian diplomat Bilibin in War and Peace, known later in Petersburg society for what he calls his mots (French for "sayings").
Levi, AKA Biff, from Lamb The Gospel According To Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal is snarky enough to have invented the word Sarcasm. Literally.
Q, in the non-canon Star Trek book I, Q. "Yeah, and if that doesn't work, maybe the Easter Bunny will save us."
Jeeves, the valet from P.G. Wodehouse's novels, was famous for his incredibly diplomatic portrayals of this trope:
(when trying to convince his employer, Bertie, not to wear a specific dinner jacket)
Bertie: But all the lads have asked for the name of my tailor.
Jeeves: Doubtless with the aim of avoiding him, sir.
Bertie: He's considered one of the best men in England!
Jeeves: I do not make any judgments regarding his moral character, sir.
The protagonist of Fifth Business is one.
Marilla Cuthbert of Anne of Green Gables is an example.
The characters of Aaron Allston's parts of the X Wing Series tend towards this trope. Most of the not-inconsiderable amount of humor in his books is of this variety.
Wedge: Phanan, Face, still Seven and Eight. I'd hate to break up the best comedy team this side of the janitor's closet.
Phanan: I love an understanding commander. Know where I can get one?
Mara Jade and Ben Skywalker are prone to this, but where Mara will start snarking just for the hell of it, Ben tends to save particularly nasty comments for moments when he's genuinely unhappy (although as we see in Outcast, he's not immune to random outbursts, either). And yes, both of them share the same irreverent sense of humor. Like mother, like son, really.
Ben: (after hearing about one of Luke's earlier failures, specifically the cave section in ESB) You know, it gives me hope that you screwed up so badly and so consistently as a kid, Dad.
- Should be noted that deadpan humor seems to be by far the most prevalent kind in the EU; nearly all named characters of note (and there are PLENTY) will throw out a snarky line at least once.
Melinda, the main character of Laurie Halse Anderson's Speak, is deadpan in all aspects of life. Considering she was raped at an end-of-summer party at the age of fourteen, it's understandable. This doesn't stop her from being one of Anderson's most hilarious and likable characters.
Artemis Fowl
Occasionally the titular character of The Bartimaeus Trilogy, but he's more of an Uncontrollably Sneering Snarker, but we love him for it.
Mogget, the cat-formed servant of the Abhorsens' in Garth Nix's Old Kingdom series practically personifies this trope. The Disreputable Dog has her moments too.
Sherlock Holmes is this trope!
- And his protégée and later wife, Mary Russell, in the Mary Russell books is just as deadpan a snarker as Holmes.
While in the main Outlander series, Lord John Gray is an example of the Officer And A Gentleman played relatively straight, he displays some definite tendencies towards being a deadpan snarker. (Well, when he's not mooning after Jamie.) Again, to some degree in his own series as well.
Many of the characters in the Vorkosigan Saga have their moments, particularly Miles Vorkosigan himself, but Simon Illyan is probably the best example.
Tybalt, King of the Cats is practically unable to be anything but this around October Daye.
Felix Castor lives this trope.
Daisy Miller:
Winterbourne: If you won't flirt with me, do cease, at least, to flirt with your friend at the piano; they don't understand that sort of thing here. Not in young unmarried women.
Daisy: It seems to me much more proper in young unmarried women than in old married ones.
The title character in Ratman's Notebooks (the source material for the Willard movies). He's so good at it that he often comes across as a satirist or an observational comedian rather than the Ed Gein-inspired criminal he is.

See the subtrope Servile Snarker — butlers and valets probably belong there rather than here.
Most Weekend Update anchors on SaturdayNightLive fall into this category - the most visible examples being Norm Mac Donald, Chevy Chase, Tina Fey, and current anchor Seth Meyers. Amy Poehler occasionally dipped into the snark action during her time opposite the latter two, but her Update persona usually vacillated somewhere between Only Sane Man and Cloudcuckoolander.
Every Joss Whedon show has a consistent Deadpan Snarker, who is also the "Joss Whedon" character on the show. However, virtually every character on every show does this at one point or another, as this trope is largely his Signature Style with regards to dialogue.
- On Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Oz is a preeminent example, though his snark was not usually pointed. Before and after he was on the show, though, snark was Xander's stock in trade. There was also the unwillingly good (and unfailingly cynical) vampire Spike. Giles also did this more than people realize.'
  Oz: That was my sarcastic voice.
  Xander: Sounds a lot like your regular voice.
- The show also has a self-appointed Deadpan Snarker in the form of Quentin Travers, the Head of the Watchers' Council, who twice arrives in town to tell everyone, in quite pointed, deadpan, and snarky terms, what a terrible job they're all doing. The failings of everyone on the team are plainly evident to him, but the fact that he's an authoritarian meanie means that even if he has a good point or two, the audience is free to dismiss those points because he "just doesn't know them like we do." Let's face it, except for Tara every regular character took their turn as this trope.
- On Angel, Cordelia was this (until of course she left), occasionally bouncing well with pre-Bad Ass'd Wesley when he was in a playful mood; the role was traded off between Fred and Gunn after she was gone, with Lorne providing backup and five-part harmony. And, of course, when Spike joined the show in season five...
- Of course, Spike has always been a Joss Whedon Mr. Snarky, playing this role in both Buffy and in Angel.
- On Firefly there was Wash (with an unfortunate emphasis on "was" as lead snarker, with his wife Zoe getting in her share of zingers, too. Mal's frequent sarcasm was bitter; Inara's rare snark was often more cutting than funny, but always spot-on. Every once in a while, Jayne would get in a good line, and Simon and even River got in on the act a few times. Book! He has the "special hell" line.
- On Dollhouse we seem to have Topher Brink as Mr. Snarky. Adelle De Witt is much more Deadpan, much less Snark, and Ballard tends to run a little too hot to get in any deadpan. Naturally more than one of the imprints—a disproportionate number, one might say—have a taste for this sort of humor.
Gil Grissom on CSI. He even has a trope named after him because of it. Jim Brass also fills this role quite regularly.
- On CSI NY, Don Flack is the resident Deadpan Snarker.
Chandler on Friends.
- In fact, one episode had Chandler's friends make a bet with him saying that he couldn't last a week of not making any smart assed comments. Chandler clearly strains his brain to resist from being sarcastic and it didn't help that his friends unintentionally (or maybe on purpose) do things that would make Chandler normally be snarky. In the end, Chandler gave up and let loose on what he was holding back over the past week and then felt relieved.
On Xplay, Adam Sessler and Morgan Webb do this all the time, especially when they review games that they give a 2 out of 5, and even more so when it is a 1 out of 5.
Stanley in the US version of The Office. Jim also responds this way to anything Dwight and Michael do.
- Toby, as of late, has become more of this: Teaching Pam how to throw a punch and asking for Michael to kick him out of a meeting all in his sad, monotone voice.
Siblings Justin Russo and Alex Russo from Wizards Of Waverly Place, despite of the fact that they are "Order Versus Chaos".
John Munch on Law and Order Special Victims Unit was once a classic Deadpan Snarker, back in the days when he actually had more than six lines per season.
- And before him there was Lennie Briscoe, the ultimate snarky cop. Jerry Orbach's brilliant, world-weary, deadpan humor practically defined the TV idea of the New York cop.
- Heck, every pair of detectives on Law and Order is pretty much required to have at least one deadpan snarker. When Munch left, his partner promptly took over the role. Even the citizens of New York occasionally join in.
  (Briscoe and Green are checking out a dead man's bank account; the bank clerk helping them has just stated that he made semi-regular deposits)
  Brisco: Let me guess, all under ten thousand dollars, right?
  Clerk: Who wants to bother with all that pesky federal paperwork?
- Det. Alexandra Eames often fills this role on Law and Order Criminal Intent.
  (on learning that a drowning victim was wearing an anti-seasickness patch)
  Eames: He should have worn a learn-to-swim patch.
In Stargate SG-1, it's pretty easy to miss, but if you go back and play close attention to those 175 episodes (that's the number of times he shows up), you may just notice that in the course of over a decade, despite having more sense of humor than his remaining teammates put together, Jack O'Neill has rarely ever cracked so much as a smirk. When pointed out to him that a character "does not know fear", he exclaims, "Yeah, well, he knows stupid!"
Ba'al: You dare mock me?
O'Neill: Ba'al, come on. You should know . Of course I dare mock you.
(and this gem:)
O'Neill: I've got a better idea. Instead of helping you, why don't we sit around and watch you get your ass kicked? That way you'll be dead, and we'll be glad.
Ba'al: You cannot be serious.
O'Neill: Yes, I can. I just choose not to, some of the time.
Ba'al: With your insolence you're dooming not just your world but all of humanity.
O'Neill: I think big.
- Daniel Jackson had a fair few snarky lines as well.
  Dr. Markov: If you're implying that everything Russian-made is of poor quality, actually, the sub is Swiss.
  Jackson: So it occasionally catches fire but keeps perfect time?
- O'Neill's successor Cameron Mitchell also gets his share of these moments in both SG-1 and The Ark of Truth.
  Prior: Foolhardy are those who do not follow the path.
  Mitchell: Anyone want to bet what he's gonna say next?
  Prior: Kill them.
  Mitchell: Could've made money on that one.
  - Which is eerily similar to a scene in Farscape where Mitchell actor Ben Browder made a similar "easy money" bet with D'argo about the approaching shuttle having Scorpius aboard.
- When he wasn't trying (and failing) to grasp the more boisterous type of Earth humor, every single line of Teal'c's that was intentionally funny on his part was deadpan snark.
In situations of stress on Stargate Atlantis, Rodney McKay cranks up the snark, at one point sarcastically saying "I foolishly left my time machine back on Earth. Did you bring yours?" while in a ticking time bomb situation. He is also apt to point out repeatedly the sheer impossibility of the plans Sheppard comes up with. This tendency has actually been toned down since the character's original appearances in SG-1.
- It should be noted that for further irony, "his" time machine is actually on Earth. Or at least the one he found.
Edmund E. Blackadder has this as his primary purpose in three different lives.
- Only three? You're forgetting the specials.
Salem from Sabrina the Teenage Witch (1996-2003 version) and its animated Spin Off.
Michael Bluth of Arrested Development. He is in charge of the family business; it's just that no one listens to him. Often doubles as the Straight Man. Not to mention the Only Sane Man.
- The narrator might also qualify as a deadpan snarker.
- He sure can. Case in point:
  Tobias: If this tableau I recreate, perhaps I can resnare my mate!
  Narrator: Gee, why wouldn't she want him back?
The Doctor in Doctor Who sometimes slips into this, especially in the new series. For instance, in "The Girl in the Fireplace":
Reinette: Oh, this is my lover, the King of France.
The Doctor: Yeah? Well, I'm the Lord of Time.
- Former companion Ian Chesterton unexpectedly developed into one of these, though sadly not until his last episode on the show.
Emerson Cod in Pushing Daisies.
- Also Lily. Even the usually polite Ned gets in on the act when he's in a really bad mood.
Dr. Gregory House on House is a very anti-social example of this trope (as well as a plethora of other tropes). James Wilson also acts as this, usually in conjunction with House and snarking right back at him. (It's probably either that or shoot him in the head.) As do Cuddy. And Foreman. And occasionally Cameron and Chase. The new kids are still getting their feet under them, but Taub does fairly well.
Kutner: The shortest distance between here and your memory is straight through your prefrontal cortex. All we have to do is access it.
Taub: Great idea. I'll build the giant submarine. You get the miniaturization gizmo.
Laverne in Scrubs. Dr. Cox also gives one-liner snarkiness when he's not ranting.
In season two of Torchwood, Ianto turned into one of these.
Tosh: If we knew how it worked, we could feed the world!
Ianto: We could release a single...
- One could argue that he always was, but was merely a lot quieter in season one. Note his attepted explanation of automatic doors in "Out of Time":
  Ianto: It's automatic. It knows you're there. There are wave-bouncing detectors which emit high-frequency radio waves....
  Diane: Ooh look, bananas!
  Ianto: Of course, bananas are far more interesting.
Hey Hey It'sSaturday, an Australian variety show, employed a team of snarkers. In addition to Red Symons, who hosted some segments, there were Dickie Knee (a mop with a cap on that would appear between the camera and the host's desk and argue with him), John Blackman (who voiced Dickie and could occasionally be heard snarking over the top of whatever else was going on in his normal voice), the occasional snarky subtitle, and a caricaturist whose drawings would be cut away to for a second at random. Note: this was all done live, off the cuff, week after week.
Both Hyde and Red from That70s Show fit this trope perfectly.
Red: So, you two are gonna save your marriage by dating strangers.
Midge: Well, Red, when you say it like that, it sounds stupid.
Red: Okay Midge, say it so it doesn't sound stupid.
- Eric does this a lot too.
  Kelso: OK, fine, but when you guys see my footprints on the moon, what are you gonna say then?
  Eric: Hey, some monkey is wearing Kelso's shoes!
- Even Donna gets in on this once in a while.
Geoffrey from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air fits this so well that it's inconceivable how he kept his job as long as he did: "At the risk of sounding redundant, dinner is served."
Philip: Good night, Geoffrey.
Geoffrey: Good night, sir, ..idiot...
Philip: Geoffrey, go fetch me my tools.
Geoffrey: You mean your knife and fork?
Well, if Benson could do it for years, in two different series starting on Soap, then why not Geoffrey too? Of course, on Soap, Benson was the snarky butler side character. On the spin-off, he was the snarky main character.
And, keeping with this theme, Mr. Moseby of The Suite Life of Zack and Cody.
Bova on Space Cases:
Harlan: I'm tired of running from the Spung! This time they're going to know they've been in a fight!
Bova: Oh, yeah, they'll be scraping us off their windshields saying, "Some fight, huh?"
Simon on American Idol is wildly known for his insults and trademark sarcasm towards contestants. During the first season he was also known for getting into fights with Paula. They still get into fights, but now there's a hell of a lot more UST.
Newman and Elaine on Seinfeld
- And Jerry
- Hell, Jerry is made of snark. It's his defining quality — for example, when he and Kramer started taking on each other's personalities due to an apartment switch, Kramer's non-existent snark level immediately shot Up To Eleven.
Drake, Josh, and Josh's girlfriend Mindy from Drake And Josh
Pick a character on Veronica Mars. Any character.
Zoltan the stuffed wolf in Young Dracula
Both the Supernatural boys are good at this, especially at giving adorable bitchfaces while doing so.
- Also Nick, the vessel for Lucifer.
Lucifer: My name is Lucifer.
Nick: Sure...naturally. Uh. Could you do me a favor there, Satan, and remind me to quit drinking before I go to bed?
Crown Attorney David Kaye on This is Wonderland, who also happens to be just a little Ambiguously Camp.
Barb on The New Adventures Of Old Christine.
Kerr Avon of Blake's 7.
Dr. Crower of American Gothic.
A certain character played by Jay Leno on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno during the 1990's... the genius Mr Brain.
James May on Top Gear. His humor is so dry you'll want a glass of water.
One word: Methos.
- The Freshmaker
Though many or most characters from Waterloo Road have their moments, first, second and third prizes have to go to Brett Aspinall.
Peter Bishop of Fringe, who seems like the only voice of semi-sanity on the show so far.
Dr. Bishop: I posited in 1976 that it is possible to synchronize the fields of two distinct minds, allowing the sharing of information across the unconscious state... like a string between two tin cans.
Peter Bishop: And, you know, what's great about that is that it's completely insane.
Dr. McCoy and Spock of Star Trek fame have both been this a few times.
- Even Scotty pulls off a few deadpan snarks.
  Montgomery Scott: The keyboard. How quaint.
- Even Kirk has his moments, when he's not losing his shirt and making out with alien babes.
Most of the main characters of Corner Gas fit this trope.
Rimmer in Red Dwarf on occasion, due to seeing himself as the Only Sane Man. One sequence sadly lost from the final episode:
Cat: How do we get to this mirror universe?
Rimmer: You mean because we've got no mode of transport apart from my old bike? Can't Krytie fix some sort of gizmo to the wheel so it crosses dimensions when you go downhill really fast?
Kochanski: You're not helping.
Rimmer: That's not my job.
- Kochanski herself is also a bit of a Deadpan Snarker, with rather more justification for being the Only Sane Person.
- It does usually seem to be a Rimmer/Cat exchange, as again in these two examples from Gunmen of the Apocalypse:
  Cat: We don't run, we strike! It's the last thing they'll be expecting!
  Rimmer: No-oo, the last thing they'll be expecting is for us to turn into ice skating mongooses and dance the bolero. And your plan makes about as much sense.
  and
  Cat: Isn't there some way we can turn ourselves into tiny electronic people and get in his head? And if not, WHY not?
  Rimmer: Look, we can all bring something to this discussion, but I think what you should bring is silence.
Niles and C.C. Babcock in The Nanny are this, especially when trying to one-up each other.
- Deadpan Snarkers that are also butlers seem to be a fairly common subtrope.
Jed Bartlet has a lot of this going on in The West Wing. His response to learning that his Vice President is a recovering alcoholic: "Is there anyone around here who's not?" Of course, being President of the United States means that people let you get away with it a bit more.
- Its almost impossibly for Bartlet to not throw out a deadpan snark at the very least once an episode. Plus, he can often turn them into CMoAs. His take on the logic of homophobia as per the Bible's teachings, anyone?
  - This is actually very common form of humor in The West Wing, expect it at least once an episode, and not just from Bartlett but from his staff as well.
  - CJ once gave such a deadpan response that she offended Mandy who took her seriously.
Shawn Spencer in Psych is so deadpan in his snark, he almost comes out the other end to earnestness.
- In fact his Deadpan Snark is so intensely deadpan that at times you wonder if he actually MEANS what he says, no matter how ridiculous it is. He can even use it on his dad.
Seven of Nine and Tuvok from Star Trek Voyager.
DCS Foyle from Foyles War.
In The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Derek Reese and Cameron trade off on this role. In the latter's case, both the deadpanning and the snark are probably entirely involuntary, as sarcasm is literally lost on her.
Morris: Is this your car?
Cameron: No, it belongs to the guy I killed and stuffed in the trunk.
Morris: ... (turns to John) Your sister is dark, man.
The titular character of Eli Stone. He's even shown to be a developing snarker as a kid in flashbacks.
Everyone on WKRP In Cincinnati was this at one point or another — even Les:
Jennifer: Well, Les? Don't you have a "line" for me?
Les: "Hi. I'm fabulously wealthy."
Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, NCIS. Also, Tony.
Illya Kuryakin in several episodes of the 60s spy series The Man From UNCLE. Usually when in the hands of THRUSH or another villain:
(Solo is deep undercover in a THRUSH laboratory, while Kuryakin has been captured by THRUSH mooks and is in a holding cell)
Napoleon Solo: (on his communicator) Open Channel D. Control, this is Sheep's Clothing. Come in, Control. Open Channel D. (sotto voce) Jammed. How about Channel F? Is there anything new on Channel F?
Illya Kuryakin: Not much. What's new with you?
Napoleon Solo: Illya, is that you? What are you doing on Channel F?
Illya Kuryakin: Don't be presumptuous. You called me.
Napoleon Solo: Where are you?
Illya Kuryakin: I'm tied up right now.
Napoleon Solo: I get the feeling you're not telling me everything.
Illya Kuryakin: Well, Miss Francis and I were detained by the THRUSH welcome wagon.
Napoleon Solo: Ah, you've been captured.
Illya Kuryakin: It's amazing how you grasp the picture with such unerring clarity.
— "The Sort of Do-It-Yourself Dreadful Affair" (third season)
In I Love Lucy, Fred Mertz is a blatant deadpan snarker, usually asking a serious question through which Lucy or Ethel become the butt of the joke.
The ever-popular sitcom Hogans Heroes gives almost every single character the role of deadpan snarker, such as responding to the kommandant's pledge of support with "we might be able to pull through anyway" or playing on the stereotypes of each prisoner's nationalities. When not acting as a (presumably) ignorant sarcastic comedian in front of the German officers, Colonel Hogan also proves to be an example of this when he makes frequent comments at the others' expense in his usual business tone of speaking.
The Andy Griffith Show's Howard Sprague became the subject of one of the episodes for his talent on delivering a punchline in the truest fashion of the deadpan snarker. Because of this, the other characters see fit to recommend his appearance on a tv show. When he uses their names to improve his performance, he gets in trouble because they become insulted by them rather than recognizing them as jokes.
Michael Weston's voiceovers in Burn Notice often come into this, as does Sam Axe.
A few of the characters on Freaks and Geeks display this quality, but Ken Miller in particular would have to be on a shortlist of characters who embody this trope.
Frazer on Neighbours.
Most every character on Mystery Science Theater 3000 was capable of this, with Crow T. Robot perhaps being the champ.
- Interestingly. The hosts had more of one part of the trope name than the other: Joel was more of a deadpan while Mike was more of a snark. The robots were mostly neutral, though Tom Servo was more polite and Crow was more direct with their insults.
Dorothy from The Golden Girls, who would mostly make sarcastic replies whenever Rose made an idiotic comment.
The titular character from Raven could be described as one.
The various hosts of E! network's Talk Soup (Greg Kinnear, John Henson, Aisha Tyler, etc.) were pretty much all about this trope.
Cal Lightman on Lie to Me, though the rest of the Lightman Group have their fair share of snark.
Doctor Cottle and Brother Cavil in Battlestar Galactica.
Wiseguy. Vinnie Terranova's OCB handler Frank McPike.
"You McPike?"
"Most of my life. In 3rd grade I was Batman, but that seems to have passed."
Several characters on Lost tend toward sarcasm, but Juliet and especially Miles are probably the most deadpan about it.
- The season one finale, Exodus:
Hurley: (as they find the Black Rock) Dude. How does something like this... happen?
Rousseau: Are you on the same island as I am?
Bob Newhart was one of these (as well as an Only Sane Man) on both The Bob Newhart Show and Newhart.
- Mr. Carlin was also one on the earlier show.
Frasier Crane, on both Cheers and Frasier.
- Lilith and Niles, as well.
Lorelai and Rory on the Gilmore Girls and pretty much every other character too.
Tenaya 7 of Power Rangers RPM is very reminiscent of Shego.
Conan O'Brien, former-Late Night and current-Tonight Show host embodies this trope in regards to talk shows. He'll generally spend the entire show mocking audience reactions, expressing disbelief at the various jokes and bits (usually as he's performing them, no less), and generally ragging on guests' stories. Not to mention his remote bits, where he takes the snarking to a third location, usually to make an affectionate mockery of a place or activity. One could make the case that you need to be a deadpan snarker in the first place to be a successful comedy talk show host, but Conan's take on the format has been to rib it from every angle.
On How I Met Your Mother we have Barney as the Deadpan Snarker... and Lily... and Ted... and Marshall... and Robin... and Tony (Stella's fiancee). HIMYM is smothered in "Big Applesauce".
Jaye on Wonderfalls definitly fits this one. Mahandra sometimes too. In fact dead pan snark is a staple for Brian Fuller: George and Rube on Dead Like Me and Emerson Cod on Pushing Daisies fit this one as well.
Jon Stewart on The Daily Show.
Most of the characters on Criminal Minds make use of this type of humor, although they occasionally can't keep a straight face. Aaron Hotchner is famous for it. David Rossi and Emily Prentiss are also both very good at this, particularly when they're working together, which just fuels the father/daughter-like relationship between the two.
- You say "father/daughter", I say May/December UST.
Lionel Hardcastle in the BBC show ''As Time Goes By' falls under this category.
Alistair: Can we have a locker room talk?
Lionel: I don't have a locker room, but you're perfectly free to talk.
The Team A captains on Shooting Stars
The titular My Family. Yes, every single member, possibly except Nick.
Dr. Freeman (Jane Lynch) on Two and a Half Men.
Most of the characters on Allo Allo, especially René. Helga's deadpan snarking also doesn't get enough credit.
Det. Fish on Barney Miller. Later, Dietrich also fulfilled this role.
Nathan from sci-fi drama Misfits, whose deadpan snarking seems to be almost a physical compulsion. He seemingly cannot prevent himself from blurting out whatever ridiculous thing comes into his head, even - and perhaps especially - when it's about to get him into massive amounts of trouble.
James Lester of Primeval, although they made him just a little more compassionate in Series 3. Just.
Jack Davenport's character Michael Colefield in the UK miniseries Ultraviolet.
Beside talking to the dead, this is pretty much all Miles on Lost does.

The website Cracked.com is the epitome of this archetype.
- So, it comes as no surpise that David Wong writes for that site.

Legendary comedy team Bob & Ray based their entire act around this trope, as applied originally to the medium they worked in, and later expanded to take in pretty much every media trend and fad going. Given their influence on modern American comedy - including but not limited to Bob Newhart and George Carlin - it could be argued that they played a major role in popularising the concept.
Bob: (introducing a "human interest" segment) We've found that you listeners enjoy hearing these pathetic people tell their tragic stories.
Robin Ince in Mitch Benn's Crimes Against Music. And in real life.
The late Humphrey Lyttleton on Im Sorry I Havent A Clue, whose chairman persona believed the entire game was insane, and the teams were clearly idiots for doing these things. (Except Mornington Crescent. That was Serious Business.)
Spock in the Spock Versus Q audio plays Armageddon Tonight and Did I say that?. Technically, Q is the Deadpan Snarker for most of the latter play, but only because he's Spock. It Makes Sense In Context.

It tends to get lost in translation, but the gospels often portray Jesus as quite the Deadpan Snarker. This article gives a pretty good overview.
- The New International Version presents it well in Mark 9:23:
  Father of boy possessed by evil spirit: But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.
  Jesus: ... "If you can"? Everything is possible for he that believes.
- Other than him, Paul of Tarsus loved to deal some snark in his epistles. In one instance, mediating an argument amongst the Galatians about circumcision, he helpfully recommends to the conservative Jewish converts agitating against the pagan converts that they "go the whole way and cut the entire thing off!"
- In I Samuel 21, David is brought before King Achish, and fearing for his life he feigns insanity. When Achish sees him, he sarcastically asks his servants if he has a shortage of madmen, that they need to bring him another.
- In 1 Kings 18, Elijah challenges the prophets of Baal to a showdown, to see whose god could ignite a sacrifice. After what must be hours of calling for Baal:
  Elijah: Call at the top of your voice, for he is a god; for he must be concerned with a matter, and he has excrement and has to go to the privy. Or maybe he is asleep and ought to wake up.
  - In the Hebrew, Elijah uses a euphemism for the bathroom part (i.e. "busy with something", or the way an English speaker might say it, "on high"). Ultimately, one wonders if he was given any prophetic foresight that the ultimate fate of the temple of Baal would be as a public toilet (2 Kings 10:27).
Buddha, reportedly.
- Oddly enough yes, but it's all in good fun for Buddha.

Stand-up comedian Rich Hall is one of the most extreme examples of this trope, even when he is genuinely overjoyed about something, he still sounds incredibly sarcastic.
Dennis Miller, back before he lost his shit on 9/11. Now, he's just a Jerkass.
Bill Hicks. Especially funny when you consider he was close friends with Sam Kinison, the absolute antithesis of deadpan.
Joey Bishop, the only comedian to be allowed in the Rat Pack.

Mary Flynn from Merrily We Roll Along. An unusual character trait given that she's the chick in her Power Trio.
Joanne in Company. She's about as snarky as you can find.
Ruth Sherwood from Wonderful Town, especially in her song "One Hundred Easy Ways".
While its hardly the first thing that comes to mind, John Proctor of The Crucible shows some of this, especially in Act One.
Arms and the Man has Nicola, who is always ready with some witty banter behind the master's back.
Phyllis from Follies.
Mercutio from Romeo and Juliet. Especially as he's dying.
Hamlet. All the time. Even talking to himself.
In Act One of Wicked Fiyero has elements of this. His response when Elphaba claims his carriage almost ran her over is to comment that his driver saw green (her skincolour) and thought it meant go, and when asked if he was sleeping rather than paying attention tells her that of course he was sleeping, it's daytime.
- Don't forget, Elphaba has a bit of deadpan snarkyness too.
In 1776, Franklin, Jefferson, and Adams all have their moments, but Jefferson wins for sheer... deadpan-yness.
Adams: Do you mean to tell me that [the Declaration of Independence] is not yet finished?!
Jefferson: No, sir. I mean to say that it is not yet begun.
- And then, almost immediately afterwards:
Adams: He has a whole week! The world was created in a week!
Jefferson: Someday you must tell me how you did it.
- One of the funniest iterations of a Running Gag:
Adams: Disgusting. Look at him, Franklin. Virginia's most famous lover!
Jefferson: Virginia abstains.
Gemma on Sons of Anarchy:
Gemma: Jesus is the guy who cuts my lawn.

Jade from Tales of the Abyss is king of this trope. Snarkiness is just his way of showing affection, after all.
Jade: Don't worry, the worst that could happen is we all die.
...
Jade: Having this many suicidal people around is really getting on my nerves.
...
Anise: Colonel, you're a terrific liar! Your smile hasn't budged!
Jade: Oh not at all, I'm crying on the inside, wracked with guilt.
Guy: Uh-huh...
Kazooie from Banjo-Kazooie, due to both plain snarkyness and being fairly Genre Savvy. Apparently this was supposed to be reduced in Nuts & Bolts. Oops.
Garrett in Thief.
Garrett: Is this how our arrangement is going to work? You coming up with ways for me to get myself killed?
Crypto in Destroy All Humans.
Falco in Star Fox.
- Not a very good one, though. In the secret Star Fox taunts of Super Smash Bros Brawl, his attempted deadpan snarking was deadpan snarked. By Slippy.
Gig from Soul Nomad And The World Eaters, who liberally throws around insults and sarcasm directed at you, your team-mates and the world in general whenever he's annoyed, smug, confrontational, or just plain bored (in other words, all of the time, except when he's offering exposition or being incredibly self-aggrandizing).
GLaDOS from Portal gradually turns into this by the end of the game.
At least one NPC in each Bioware RPG (Baldur's Gate, Knights Of The Old Republic, Jade Empire, Mass Effect, Dragon Age: Origins) will be of this sort, and the game will occasionally allow the main character to snark it up too.
Turian Councillor: And how many generations do you think it will take for them to wipe us out?!
Shepard: Three. No, wait! Four!
- Almost all of your party members in Dragon Age: Origins have a hint of this, particularly Alistair, Morrigan and Sten.
Rouge often slips into this in Sonic Chronicles. It's a pity she's such a Spoony Bard gameplay-wise, since bringing her along to plot related stuff often results in funny.
- Sonic, too. Basically any Dialogue Tree option symbolized by a winking Sonic will result in snarking.
The Legend of Zelda has both Tatl from Majora's Mask and Midna from Twilight Princess, although the latter to a much greater extent than the former.
Lawrence, the robot butler of Big Bad Dr. Nefarious in the third Ratchet And Clank game. Most of Lawrence's snarkiness is directed at his (largely oblivious) boss, but he manages to get off a few snide remarks at the heroes, as well.
Nefarious: So this is the mighty Q-Force? I could destroy the lot of you and it wouldn't even get mentioned in Supervillain Weekly!
Lawrence: Ah, but think of the favor you'd be doing the fashion world, sir.
Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney is commonly the sole voice of reason in his world of spirit mediums, crazy dominatrix prosecutors, and wacky courtroom hijinks (despite being the cause of half of them).
- This even continues after he is no longer the lawyer in the newer games; if anything becoming even more snarky as he becomes a bit of a Chess Master.
- At one point in the third game, you get to play as Miles Edgeworth. He's much more of a Deadpan Snarker than Phoenix.
  - He's also going to be getting his own game, Or So I Heard.
- Apollo Justice from the fourth game also gets in on the act too. "I'm a lawyer. I live for needless procedures."
Centurion Tenebrae carries on right where Jade left off in Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World.
- He doesn't always succeed.
  - Especially not when Colette's around.
Yuri Lowell from Tales of Vesperia has been called Jade 2.0 for a reason...
- Don't forget Rita.
Both The Bard and the unnamed narrator, in the 2004 version of The Bard's Tale. They trade barbs to each other about the ridiculous things that happen in the game.
- In fact, "snarky" is a actual in game option to chose when engaging in dialogue.
Trilby in 5 Days a Stranger definitely feels snarky... and can you blame him?
Ling Tong's debut in Dynasty Warriors portrayed him as a deadpan snarker, primarily to Gan Ning. Averted in the spin-off/crossover Warriors Orochi, where he's just an ass.
Ishida Mitsunari in Samurai Warriors, and even more so in the spin-off game Warriors Orochi acting as [[ Cao Pi's]] primary foil.
Haskill from The Elder Scrolls IV: Shivering Isles. He's never not snarking at you.
With all the shit Niko Bellic gives his clients, it's a surprise he gets work.
- Huang is pretty much the same in Chinatown Wars; it's a pity absolutely no one takes him seriously.
Several characters from Neverwinter Nights 2 fulfill this trope, most notably Sand, Bishop (who only does it to wound people) and, sometimes, Neeshka.
- Though most of the time, Neeshka does it with too much emotion attached to truly fit this trope. It's usually in response to one of the other companions rubbing her the wrong way, after all.
Disgaea games are guarenteed to have at least one per game.
Morte from Planescape: Torment, who is such an aggravating snarker that he has a special ability called "litany of curses" that can drive your enemies so crazy with anger they have to attack him in melee. Even if they're a Squishy Wizard.
Zyzyx from Sacrifice, who incidentally is voiced by Rob Paulsen, the same man who voiced Morte above. Amongst the gods, Stratos can also get rather sarcastic at times, and even good ol' boy James displays a surprisingly dry wit at times.
Saki Tsuzura from the all-female fighting game Arcana Heart has some win quotes that have her flatly criticizing an opponent's skill and/or mindset.
In Marvel Ultimate Alliance, Spider-Man EPITOMIZES this trope. 25% of his time is being useful, 75% is being an ass to Nick Fury.
Fury: Spider-Man. Didn't expect you to answer my call [for help].
Spider-Man: What? And miss riding on the Helicarrier? This beast has gotta be the biggest waste of tax payer money in history. Hey, you guys have any plans to make a flying Mt. Rushmore? Seriously, that would totally rock.
- Deadpool is a close second, although much of his comments are a bit more on the surreal side.
  - If you have them both in the same party, the former deadpan snarks at the latter about finally meeting someone whose jokes are worse than his.
  - In Deadpool's solo mission he encounters an evil clone of Spidey. They engage in an epic Snark-Off, until Evil-Spidey's master Arcade gets annoyed and interrupts so they can actually get to the fight.
Grandia II uses the main character as its snarker, resulting in many wonderful conversations where the party wants to stop and help people in need, and Ryudo rolls his eyes, mocks them all, and reluctantly agrees to go along with it.
Solid Snake, either in his own games or in Super Smash Bros. Brawl.
In the Vampire The Masquerade Bloodlines, Beckett is a prime Deadpan Snarker, as is Deb, the host for an in-game late-night radio talk show.
Damon Baird. Marcus Fenix also comes in close behind him, especially when they're paired together, to the point where Dom remarks that its "Like two assholes on their first date."
The Stranger from Terminal Reality's Nocturne claims to have no sense of humor, but still manages to deliver some vicious one-liners to those around him, particularly when he is especially annoyed (i.e. much of the time).
Bobby Jo: Are you married?
Stranger: No.
Bobby Jo: My daddy says I'm going to make some lucky man very happy some day when I get married.
Stranger: He was probably referring to himself.
Neku Sakuraba in The World Ends With You, especially in Another Day. Joshua as well, though he's a lot less cynical and does it more for the sake of annoying Neku.
Guillo. Full stop. Baten Kaitos Origins is pretty much worth playing just to hear Guillo's hilarious remarks. This is just one example:
Guillo: Who throws barrels at people? What are you, some monkey who's run off with a pretty wench?
The ability to select dialogue options allows you to be this in Fallout 3. In fact, one of a set of optional quest rewards depends on your willingess to respond snidely to a variety of questions.
"Too... tired... to be... snide."
The Jak and Daxter games dispense this trope with a Vulcan Fury. Daxter has been known to ask the progression-critical warrior NPC "Have you tried attacking him with your melodrama? 'Cause it's killing me!". Samos is also fairly good at it...oh, and when Jak takes his Superpowered Evil Side Level in Badass, he begins dropping his own smart remarks.
An interesting case in Bomberman 64 The Second Attack where Bomberman himself, despite being portrayed as a Heroic Mime in the game, is revealed to actually be a deadpan snarker after getting the good ending which goes back and shows what the White Bomber was saying in most of game's cutscenes. Most of which are snarky comebacks directed at his comic relief partner, Pommy.
Given the fact that the series has Loads And Loads Of Characters, Fire Emblem naturally has some of these. Ranulf is probably the best example, though Ike himself is pretty good at it when Ranulf's not around.
Deus Ex has a lot of snarky remarks here and there.
JC Denton: A bomb's a bad choice for close-range combat.
...
JC Denton: You mechs may have copper wiring to reroute your fear of pain, but I've got nerves of steel.
...
Walton Simons: You take another step forward and here I am again, like your own reflection in a hall of mirrors.
JC Denton: That makes me one ugly son of a bitch. How'd my face get all marked up with bioelectrics?
...
Bob Page: You're too late! Already I am more than human...
JC Denton: Does that mean I don't get the job?
Aschen Brodel from Super Robot Taisen: OG Saga: Endless Frontier is one of these... when she's not being a Genki Girl due to the mental effects of her Super Mode.
- Hell, about a third of the dialogue in the game is snarking, deadpan or otherwise.
The newest incarnation of the Prince certainly qualifies; he uses snarkiness to complement his role as a Loveable Rogue.
- Well, so did the older one. It was part of his charm. The fact that he stopped snarking in Warrior Within was the first sign of his Character Derailment.
"Of course, finding my way to the baths from here should be easy. I'll just ask the nearest sand creature. 'Could you direct me to the baths? Thanks.' 'No problem, I used to be a bath attendant back when I was alive'."
Colonel Hakha from Killzone is one of these, providing an excellent foil to Rico's dumbassery.
Archibald Ironfist, from Might And Magic, tends towards this, though especially in Heroesof Might And Magic II, this sometimes overlaps with gloating.
Raziel from the Legacy of Kain series is an excellent example of the trope, especially from Soul Reaver 2 on. It's made even better because he speaks in the distinctive style the games are known for.
Raziel: Oh no. Every time you turn up something monumental and terrible happens. I don't think I have the stomach for it.
- This is particularly funny because, as a twice-reincarnated wraith whose physical body was burned away when he was thrown into a whirlpool as a vampire (a race to which water and acid might as well bear the same label), he quite literally does not have the stomach for monumental and terrible things since he doesn't have a stomach at all anymore.
With the recent new campaign, Crash Course, for Left 4 Dead, tough guy Francis has become a bit of a snarky character. The snark bait is mostly confined to the intro where he tells Louis that they just escaped from a helicopter crash and have to walk the rest of the way and asks him if he still feels positive now.
- Also, his tendency to tease Zoey for having killed the helicopter pilot:
Francis: (upon seeing zombies) Just pretend they're helicopter pilots!
- In the second installment, Nick tends to fill that role, sometimes even falling into this.
Coach: Shit, I used to go here when I was a kid!
Nick: Oh good! Now we can die here as adults.
Since the game is about people with horrible backstories and their efforts to get past them, most of the cast of Fate Stay Night are snarkers to a degree. Even the Token Loli gets in plenty of burns in whenever she's not acting cute. Even Shirou is an acute smartass and observer while narrating; he's just too polite to let the snark out most of the time. The best example, however, is Archer, who despite being Shirou from the future, is much less polite, and spends most of his time making fun of his allies, his enemies, and his Rin. Rin herself enjoys messing with people politely, but her favourite target is Shirou, since she can be as rude as she likes and Shirou is a funny masochist who likes arguing with her. The only main characters who don't snark are Taiga, Saber and Sakura; but if you can get past the reserve and self-loathing respectively, you'll see that Sakura snarks with the best of them like her sister Rin, and Saber's chivalrous politeness hides a sharp tongue which is revealed mainly due to Shirou's disregard for practicality.

About half the cast of Red Vs Blue, especially Grif and Church.

Simmons: Well of course it sounds stupid when you say it like that.

Lampshaded when the Reds ask Grif to come up with his own plan and he's unable to think of anything. "My skills lie more in listening to other people's plans and telling them what's wrong with them."

Gary to Roamin the Paladin in Unforgotten Realms. Usually in the form of blunt, tactless explanations of how Roamin is being stupid.
Roamin: Gary, why are we even friends?
Gary: Well, no-one will be friends with you, and I enjoy pissing on people's parades.
Roamin: Better reasons than most, I suppose.
Gary: Not really, it's probably the worst reason for being friends out of anyone who has ever used the word "friendship" to describe their bond with another person.
Homestar Runner: Strong Bad. Strong Sad sometimes fulfills this role when he isn't busy being The Eeyore.
Raimi Matthews from Broken Saints.

Antimony and Reynardine from Gunnerkrigg Court.
Reynardine: Haha! Tired already, child?
Antimony: Don't be so cocky. You don't have any lungs.
Jason Grey in The Wotch (and Sonja as well of course).
Stickman from Stickman and Cube.
Zodon from the web- and print-comic PS238.
Tycho in Penny Arcade.
Roy Greenhilt from The Order of the Stick has his snarkiness being his primary character flaw.
- What do you mean, "flaw"?
  - Well, it's a flaw according to the beings of pure law and good that judge him in the afterlife, anyway. Since he is Lawful Good, that's a flaw.
- He's also notably the lead hero, not a supporting character. Among the supporting roles, Vaarsuvius plays this role often.
  - As does Belkar, post-fake Character Development.
    Crystal: Arrgh! You little twit, I'm gonna kill you!
    Belkar: Yeah, and I'm going to drop a house on you and sing about how I represent the Lollipop Guild. C'mon, let's keep our threats realistic, shall we?
- On the evil side, this role is usually taken by Redcloak, who is often paired up with over-the-top cliched bad guy Xykon or the adorably naive Monster in the Darkness.
  Redcloak: I'm on my way to finish zombifying the monsters we killed up in the tower.
  MitD: Yeah, I can help with that.
  Redcloak: Really? So, I guess those three boxes of mallomars you finished off somehow earned you enough XP to gain 5 levels in cleric overnight.
  MitD: Well, they were especially chewy....
  Redcloak: Then unless you are volunteering your services as raw materials, I don't think you are going to be much help.
  - Pretty much half of the named characters get a crowning moment of snark or two, and even some unnamed. Bonus points to Spoony Bard Elan, who's not particularly bright most of the time, doubles as his Crowning Moment Of Awesome when he pulls a What The Hell Hero moment on Varsuvius when he/she killed a minor villain purely because he/she was impatient that the plot wasn't moving fast enough for his/her taste.
Kris from Bardsworth.
Faye (and others) in Questionable Content.
Nearly all the cast of Something Positive, but Davan is King Snark. Also many people in another of the author's comics, Super Stupor. Come to think of it, perhaps every character R. K. Milholland creates.
- And thus, probably Milholland himself, as well.
ADVENTURERS! has one in each camp: Ardam for the heroes and Argent for the villains. Though Ardam is usually more "exasperated" than "deadpan".
Jason in Multiplex. Funnily enough, he is often confused for an Author Avatar, which the author denies... to some extent.
Most of the cast of Lackadaisy Cats indulges in some snark, but Zib almost exists to offer his sarcastic take on matters.
Rayne of Least I Could Do goes so far over the top with the Idiot Hero and Handsome Lech routines that most of the rest of the cast are divided into those who can use deadpan snarking to survive his bombastic ways (Issa and Noel), and those who turn into his punching bags (Jon and Mick). Noel is probably the best example.
Any character in Antihero For Hire who isn't a) Doctor Nefarious b) ice-powered guy still looking for a name c) Baron Diamond. And even they have their moments.
Half the regular [non-superhero] cast in Head Trip, Lilian especially, plus Chemokid.
A vast majority of the cast of 8-Bit Theater. Most notable are Sarda, Black Mage, Thief, and White Mage.
Kei in Circumstances of the Revenant Braves.
Emperor Krosp in Girl Genius. Then again, he /is/ a cat. It comes with the territory.
Dewey from Unshelved.
Mell: People don't like it when you're right all the time.
Dewey: If being right is wrong, I don't want to be right. Nah, I still want to be right.
Nancy in Rhapsodies.
Pretty much every main and supporting character in both Michael Poe's Errant Story have their moments of this, but the males seem especially prone to it. Jon and Ellis probably have a Snark/Strip ratio of 2:1.
Green in The Law of Purple occasionally pulls a Deadpan Snarker moment, as does his brother Blue.
Marius from My Life In Blue.
While Artax tries it occasionally...
Yeager: Contrary to... most of my dating history, not every woman who's interested in me is a flesh-craving abomination.
Artax: Really? Have you been seeing someone we don't know about?

: ... Nodwick does it more or less nonstop.
Artax: She Who Must Not Be Named has taken That Which Man Was Not Meant To Know!
Nodwick: Did she say where She Who went?
Artax: To The Lands Which Know No Name!
Nodwick: Uh-huh... let me know if we find any proper nouns in all this mess.

In RPG World, pretty much every member of the main cast gets a turn at deadpan snarking, even the dim-witted Hero. Cherry, Eikre, and Reka are the most frequent offenders.
Most of the cast of Fletcher Apts except for Kia and Mr.Fletcher.
Susan in El Goonish Shive.
K, Liz, Mary, and (of course) [[Satan Lucifer}} from Blip.
Bunker from Sandusky.
Brent Sienna from Pv P.
Reuben from Woods For The Trees.
Daniel from Footloose, which can result in his receiving a smack (or boot) upside the head from his twin sister Jin.

This guy is pretty sarcastic to his father while he's making himself ready to hang himself with his tie. Then again, that's pretty understandable after reading My Immortal .
Sarah in lonelygirl15 and, to a much lesser extent, LG15: the resistance.
The title character of Joss Whedon's Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. (See the page quote)
John, and to a lesser extent, Dave, from John Dies at the End.
Jeff Andonuts, hands down, in Fobbies Are Borange.
Jeff: Isn't your mom's name Rosie?
Paula: Well, yeah...
Jeff: Rosie the robot. He took the name from the Jetsons. Your mother is a robot, Paula.
At the Super Hero School Whateley Academy, a LOT of the main characters. Phase has a very dry delivery, but (quite reluctantly) admits that Chaka is even funnier. Jobe (an amoral side character) and Jericho (a newer main character) also fit this trope.
Common both in and out of character in Survival Of The Fittest. One of the better examples would be Sean O'Cann, at least in his moments of clarity.
Ben Croshaw very rarely feels the need to be deadpan—his humor's most often very blatant. Every so often, though...
Danny Brady in Shadow Unit often fills this role, and so does Daphne Worth from time to time—usually when she's trying to outdo Brady.
That Guy With The Glasses.
- To be precise, a large portion of all the sites reviewers have a Snarker tendency.
Professor Otaku frequently uses this, but its also aided by the fact that he lacks any sort of smiling facial expression. Growing up on Spider-Man comic books probably didn't help.
As Unskippable's premise is based off of Mystery Science Theatre 3000, it's only expected that the two hosts play this role to a T.

Tyrone from The Backyardigans plays this role both audibly and more often visually. Somehow, despite him not wearing pants, he manages to give the impression he's slouching with his hands stuck in his pockets.
(from "To the Center of the Earth", after Tyrone loses his penny a second time because of Uniqua's invention)
Tyrone: See? I could have just walked over to get it. Now it's lost!
Professors Uniqua & Pablo: Poppycock! Inventions are always the way!
Tyrone: The way to drop my penny.
Spider-Man, especially in the most recent series.
Scourge occasionally plays this to Cyclonus in Transformers.
Cyclonus: (in reference to hearing something moving) It's probably just the wind.
Scourge: Cyclonus, there's no wind in space.
Huey Freeman on The Boondocks.
Frylock on Aqua Teen Hunger Force, but Master Shake acts as the Deadpan Snarker in Total Re-Carl.
Sparks on Sealab 2021.
Similarly, Peanut on Harvey Birdman Attorney At Law.
Sokka on Avatar The Last Airbender initially fit this role like a glove, but as time went on, he developed into actually being the one to make the plans.
Katara: If it looks like trouble, we'll leave.
Sokka: Yeah, because we always leave before we get into trouble....
- Fortunately, Toph came in and was able to successfully fulfill, if not surpass him in, this role: "I don't know if you've noticed, but things don't always go so smoothly for our little gang." The creators actually comment on the DVD Commentary that she took the place Sokka had before he shifted to a livelier character from his voice-actor's performance.
- Mai has elements of it as well:
  Guard: What are you doing?!
  Mai: Saving the jerk who dumped me.
  - "We lost."◊
Shego from Kim Possible. In fact, she consideres Drakken to be little more than mocking gold.
Shego: Okay, let's get Plan Too-Complicated-To-Actually-Work over with.
...
Drakken: Would it hurt you to show a little enthusiasm?
Shego: Woohoo, extra hoo. Happy?
...
Shego: Y'know, for someone who's supposedly a mad genius, I'm not seeing much of the "genius".
Dr. Drakken: Keep it up Shego, and you'll see plenty of the "mad".
Shego: Ooh, scary man.
- Fun-fact: Shego wasn't originally planned to be like this, but after the directors realized how much talent her voice actress had in doing the Deadpan Snarker, they changed her whole script.
- Kim herself also has her moments.
In the latter episodes, Stan from South Park has a habit of pinching the bridge of his nose and sigh, when other character does something stupid. He often exclaims "Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here" and, in "Child Abduction is Not Funny", he remarks to Kyle, "Dude, sometimes I think our parents are really stupid," and as they rejoin their families at the conclusion of the episode, "Jesus Christ, dude, they've done some stupid crap before, but, Jesus Christ...".
- And there's Craig :
  Craig: This is fun. Let's walk for miles through a spooky jungle. It just keeps getting better and better.
  ...
  Stan: Dude, what is this place?
  Random guy: It's like... an unknown valley that time forgot, where everything grows huge.
  Craig: That's a shock. I decided to follow you, guys, and now I'm in land of a giant's lost world.
  ...
  Stan: Let's see what's in there.
  Craig: Let's see what's in there. That's why you guys get into these situations. Because when you come across a spooky, ancient ruin, you say: "Let's see what's in there."
- Of course, all Craig's lines are like this.
Rattrap from Transformers: Beast Wars fits this role perfectly. He is snide, cynical, and sarcastic. He's notable for his frequent use of the phrase "We're all gonna die.", and constantly bickers with Dinobot, and, later, Depth Charge. He is, however, a capable soldier and, if need be, leader, though Jerk With A Heart Of Gold may be stretching it.
Rattrap: Eh, command's a pain in the tail... especially with this pack of hyenas. You can keep it.
- Blackarachnia, as the show's resident Dark Action Girl, also qualifies. Especially when dealing with Silverbolt.
Slapper, Gas Skunk, and Dark Scream do this a lot to their boss, Sky-Byte, in Transformers: Robots in Disguise.
Squidward from SpongeBob SquarePants.
Mandy, from The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy. Grim has his moments, too.
Daria from Daria is a deadpan snarker to the point of having a trope based off of her.
- See also Jane Lane.
- See also, on occasion, Trent Lane, Tom Sloane, Jodie Landon, and Michael Jordan Mac Kenzie (a.k.a. Mack).
Brian from Family Guy is an example. The fact that he is a dog is one of the show's MANY running gags.
Raven in Teen Titans:
Beast Boy: See? [Blackfire] thinks I'm funny.
Raven: Statistically, I suppose someone has to.
Beast Boy: >:O
- And, of course:
  (unicorn statuette causes a secret door to open)
  Raven: Well, that's not suspicious...
Sgt. Mike Cosgrove from Freakazoid is a gruff, eyeless example of this trope and is thoroughly played for laughs. Examples of his deadpan nature include his catchphrase, a deadpan command of "Cut it out." which seems to have a supernatural ability to manipulate people into stopping whatever they're doing no matter what it is, similar to a Jedi mind trick, and a scene where he tries to comfort the main character, Freakazoid, for his Cloudcuckoolander-based problems by saying, "You're not a failure kid. It's just that your ideas are silly and dumb."
- There's really no snark to Cosgrove, just enough deadpan and ineffect to have the same result. To give an idea of his deadpan "Cut it out." power, in the comics based on the shows, Cosgrove used it successfully on the Animaniacs. This is the only time the Animaniacs have ever stopped when told.
Hawkgirl from Justice League, who especially had a talent for dishing verbal ownage out on Flash:
Flash: Fastest man alive.
Hawkgirl: Which probably explains why you can't get a date.
- In his few brief appearances, villain Shade has his moments:
  Shade: Lex Luthor? The plot thins.
Jamie from Megas XLR is, while being a strong coward and womanizer, a decent example of the trope. He is often well aware of and comments on the lunacy and danger of Coop's actions and, sometimes, dialogue. That being said however, he seems to enjoy the destruction Coop's actions brings, so may or may not comment if it doesn't directly affect him.
Dougal in The Magic Roundabout, at least in the English language version. Adapter and voice artist Eric Thompson based his portrayal of Dougal on Tony Hancock's radio and TV persona.
Lula the talking sword in Dave the Barbarian.
Tecna in Winx Club sometimes acts like this.
Limburger in Biker Mice From Mars.
Schnitzel in Chowder, though since he's The Unintelligible, we hear all of his snark second-hand.
Courage's computer in Courage the Cowardly Dog. Being forced to do research on zombie film directors and methods of exorcising a mattress will do that to anyone, though.
Laura in Dr Katz Professional Therapist.
Ben: So... you're my father's receptionist. You know, I mean, in a way, we're sort of related, you and I, like siblings or something, because we both work for my Dad. I mean, you're his receptionist, and I'm his son. So, you know, fantastic, super.
Laura: Could you go now?
Norm the Genie from The Fairly Oddparents. Pretty much every sentence is a Deadpan Snark. In the episode "Back to the Norm", Norm teams up with Crocker and constantly Deadpan Snarks him. An example is when Crocker is spazzing, Norm makes him hold a mousse shake thing. When Crocker finishes, Norm says, "That's how I like my shakes. Spazzed, not stirred."
Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.
- Lisa often fills this role occasionally, especially when interacting with the severely less intelligent Bart and Homer.
Spanky Ham on Drawn Together.
The last episode of The Tick featured superhero-in-training Sarcastro, a man dressed as Fidel Castro who was sarcastic. In fact, being really sarcastic was his only stated superpower, and the only time he got to use it in a heroic fashion (he spent most of the episode snarking at the Tick and the other superhero cadets) was when he faced down the Monster Of The Week, a hitman using a suit of Powered Armor:
Sarcastro: Oh, sure, I'm gonna fight you. (runs away)
Digeri Dingo from Taz-Mania is by far the most sarcastic character on the show.
D. W. from Arthur often switches between being the Deadpan Snarker and a Large Ham.
D.W.: (while at the Washington Monument) First we were down there looking up here, and now we're up here looking down there. What's the point?
Darkwing Duck:
Gosalyn: There's something strange about that Bug Master.
Darkwing: Yeah, she's in a bug costume threatening a cockroach. I'd call that strange.
- His adopted daughter Gosalyn, as well. Her reponse on almost being dropped to her death is, "And to think I used to buy tickets for rides like that."
Obi-Wan in Star Wars The Clone Wars. If anything, he's even deadpan snarkier in the show than he was in the movies.
Almost certainly, Gromit from Wallace and Gromit would be a Deadpan Snarker if he could actually talk. As it is, he can communicate more with an eye-roll than almost anyone...
Ruby-Spears-version Protoman has a tendency to do this.
Cutman: Almost got him!
Protoman: "Almost" only counts in horseshoes, Cutman.
Though quite a few characters engaged in snark on Dungeons And Dragons, it was a particular specialty of Eric: "Now why didn’t I think of that? A game of patty-cake will stop an army of raging orcs any day!"
In the show Libertys Kids, both Sarah and James switch off in playing this role. More often than not, it's James snarking about how stuffy the high society that Sarah was born into is. Though Sarah has been known to throw a great deal of snark right back at him about how infantile Americans in general — and James specifically — can be.
C.A.R. on The Replacements, usually at Dick's expense.
Garfield, especially when dealing with someone he finds particularly obnoxious, like Nermal or the Buddy Bears.
Sam(antha) Manson on Danny Phantom:
Danny: (to Tucker) You can get your own date for the dance like I did.
Sam: Does he have to take off his pants and act like a dweeb, or will either one do?
- Tucker actually has his moments like this, as well:
  Jazz: (after accidentally trapping Danny in the ghost trap) Think I should work on my banter?
  Tucker: Start with your aim.
Nikki Wong on Six Teen.
Raggedy Andy in the Chuck Jones Raggedy Ann and Andy shorts.
- From "The Pumpkin Who Couldn't Smile":
  Raggedy Andy: Why don't we just take someone else's pumpkin?
  Raggedy Ann: You can't make someone happy by making someone else sad!
  Raggedy Andy: Ever try it?
Ulrich of Code Lyoko, usually in response to Odd's latest idiocy or Jérémie's technobabble. Yumi can get into this too at times.
Dukey from Johnny Test is a mix of Deadpan Snarker, Voice Of Reason and a Large Ham.
Phaeton from Exo Squad is this. Which is odd, given that he's the Big Bad.
June from Ka Blam! IS the trope.

Winston Churchill
Lady Astor: If you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: If you were my wife, I'd drink it.
- Don't forget
Unknown: You, sir, are drunk.
Church: Yes, madam, I am. But in the morning I will be sober, and you will still be ugly.
Stephen Colbert
Simon Cowell
Terry Wogan — Irish commentor on the Eurovision Song Contest.
Oddly enough (and almost ironically), Spartans in real life, despite being intense Blood Knights and badasses are reknowned for their startlingly Deadpan Snarker nature (laconic wit originated from them). Examples include King Demaratus's response to someone asking him who the most exemplary Spartan was: "He that is least like you.", and the Spartans' response to both Phillip II and Alexander the Great's threat that if they bring their army into their land and win the war, then it will mean Sparta's destruction. They replied with a one word response: "If." (Subsequently, both Phillip II and Alexander avoided Sparta entirely).
- Another beautiful example of this is when, during the Battle of Thermopylae, the Spartans were told that the Persian arrows would be so thick as to blot out the sun. The Spartan response was: "Then we shall fight in the shade."
  - And again, when asked by the Persian army to lay down their weapons, their response was "Molon Labe", Greek for "Come and take them." In fact, dry wit was pretty much invented by the Spartans. This would also make it Older Than Feudalism. Of course, you already knew most of these.
- After the battle of Cunaxa, King Artaxerxes II of Persia asked the Greeks involved in the battle to surrender their weapons. The response of their Spartan commander Klearchos: "It is not the victors who lay down their arms."
- Xenophon's Anabasis gives us this comment on preparations for festive games at Trapezos:
  Spartan mercenary 1: How can we wrestle on ground as rocky and overgrown as this?
  Spartan mercenary 2: The one who gets thrown will get hurt a bit more.
This is essentially comedian Dylan Moran's entire stage persona, and makes up the majority of his television and film roles.
General Anthony McAuliffe famously reponded to a German request for surrender during the Seige of Bastogne, during the Battle of the Bulge during World War Two, with one word: Nuts.
- "Nuts" at the time meant something similar to "Suck my balls".
Mark Twain, at times.
Oscar Wilde
Dorothy Parker
Fran Lebowitz
Canadian Father-of-Our-Country, Prime Minister Sir John A. Macdonald, lived and breathed this trope.
Well-Dressed Lady: (falls over, hoopskirt flies up)
Sir John A.: (laughs his ass off)
W.-D.L.: (pissed) I can see, sir, that you are no gentleman!
Sir John A.: And I can see, madam, that neither are you.
- And then there was the time he showed up in the House of Commons hung-over, threw up, and declared that comments made by the Leader of the Opposition had made him ill.
- AND, when caught embezzling money from the Canadian Pacific Railway? "I should never have put it in writing."
- Or the other time he showed up in the House of Commons drunk: "Yes, but the people would still prefer John A. drunk to George Brown sober".
Bill Maher.
Former U.S. President Calvin "Silent Cal" Coolidge. During a dinner, a guest informed him she had taken a bet that she couldn't get him to say more than two words that whole night. His response? "You lose."
- And then there was the time at another dinner, where the conversation turned to Soviet Russia and became quite heated as a result (Cal hanging back as usual). Good hostess that she was, his wife tried to defuse the situation by asking, "Now, what dressing would everyone prefer on their salad? Italian or Catalina?" Coolidge answered mildly, "I'll take the one that isn't Red."
Ski movie maker Warren Miller is famous for this.
Jane Austen
Roger Ebert is well-known for his Genre Savvy snark in his film reviews.
George Orwell had his dry wit, with saying like "it seems, that in modern political discourse in England, Facism means 'everything I don't like'", "Sometimes the first duty of intelligent men is the restatement of the obvious", "Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it" and this particular gem:
"No one I met at this time — doctors, nurses, practicantes, or fellow-patients — failed to assure me that a man who is hit through the neck and survives it is the luckiest creature alive. I could not help thinking that it would be even luckier not to be hit at all."
Anthony Bourdain. His snarky, long voiceovers in No Reservations say ALL you need to know.
Pretty much any writer who makes habitual use of the Lemony Narrator, What Do You Mean Its Not Awesome or Lampshade Hanging tropes. Neal Stephenson, Terry Pratchett, Christopher Moore and Neil Gaiman come immediately to mind.
- Memoir writers that reflect on dark moments or awkward memories often use this type of language. David Sedaris is a prime example.
A vast number of political hecklers.
- Though not nearly as vast a number as those who think they are.
- Politicians too: According to one article on George W Bush, he was brought up by a famously competitive father and adopted "almost nonstop towel snapping" as a survival mechanism.
- FactCheck.org, when dealing with the craziest of Conspiracy Theorists and most overblown of chain e-mails, indulges in quite a bit of this.
ESPN's Stuart Scott.
Paul Merton falls here as does Ian Hislop from Have I Got News For You.
Fern Britton: (to Paul, after going on about Madonna adopting a child from Africa) Sorry, am I boring you?
Paul: (bluntly) Yes.
...
—>Ian: (on Prince Charles) Britain's oldest man.
Star Trek fans are often startled by the contrast between the innocence of Data and the incredibly deadpan snark of Brent Spiner.
Current American President Barack Obama
- "Contrary to popular belief, I was not born in a manger. I was sent in a rocket ship from the planet Krypton, by my father, Jor-El, to save the Earth."
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh and husband of the British Queen also lives this trope (often in a very racist and politically incorrect way):
- “How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?” to a driving instructor in Scotland
- “Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they are complaining they are unemployed” at the time of the recession in 1981
- “You could do with losing a bit of weight.” Said to a 13-year-old boy who wanted to become an astronaut.
- “How can you tell the difference between them?”, At a meeting with the US-President Barack Obama when he told him that he had just met with the Chinese and Russian ambassadors.
Marcus Tullius Cicero. Plutarch lists several of his snarky sayings, such as:
Publius Consta, who wanted to be a lawyer, but was ignorant and stupid, was once summoned by Cicero as witness in a case; and when he kept saying that he knew nothing, "Perhaps," said Cicero, "you think you are being questioned on points of law.
It may be because of a few of his more recent characters (Tony Stark, Sherlock Holmes), but Robert Downey, Jr. seems to fit this pretty well.
The Beatles, particularly in their early days, were known to be quite snarky and quick-witted in interviews, which came across as a breath of fresh air following a generation of overly earnest, overly polite and slightly dull so-called 'rock' musicians. Of the four, John Lennon was probably the snarkiest:
Reporter: Can you sing something for us?
John Lennon: No, we need money first.
Stephen Hawking is quite the smart-alec for a guy in a wheelchair. Inspiring, really.

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