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The Jerk Index

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Either check out the list of tropes that involve jerks in some way, shape, or form, or fuck off!

I'M DEAF! SPEAK UP OR FUCK OFF!!

Oh and of course, contrast us with those goody-two-shoed twink-looking types at A Polite Index. BUT don't even think about confusing this for This Index Touches Itself (though all the virgins do that), or Tear Jerker (which makes you lot look like pathetic weak pussies who cry like anime fans on prom night), or the Steve Martin film The Jerk, let alone indexes that are just as full of annoying trash, or I'll kick your ass!


Look at the tropes, and quit stumbling like some lummox!:

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    Types of Jerks 
  • Absolute Xenophobe: You're not one of us, so you must be shunned, exiled, or die!
  • Abusive Offspring: I'm your child, but that doesn't mean you should treat me like crap. No, actually I should boss you around, so do what I say or I will kick your ass!
  • Abusive Parents: I'm your parent and I can do and say whatever the hell I want to you, you du-get here you little...! Now do what I say or I'll whoop your ass some more!
  • Adult Hater: I hate grown-ups and I'm sick of them ordering me around!
  • Affection-Hating Kid: I hate it when grownups kiss each other and talk all mushy when I'm around!
  • The Aggressive Drug Dealer: I'm gonna get you to buy my drugs even if I have to force you to get addicted to them!
  • Alpha Bitch: I'm the queen bee of high school! Pathetic losers without my perks aren't worthy to be around my presence!
    • Academic Alpha Bitch: I'm also smarter than you, too!
    • Beta Bitch: I'm the second-in-command! I may not be alpha, but at least I'm nowhere near a loser like them and their friends!
    • Lovable Alpha Bitch: I look down on every loser in school... Except you. You're alright in my book.
  • "Angry Black Man" Stereotype: Those white people are always out to get us!
  • Angry Chef: YOU MESSED UP IN MY KITCHEN; I'M STARTING TO GET REALLY MEAN!
  • Angry White Man: Society has become too diverse, we white people are getting the shaft!
  • Annoying Younger Sibling: I'm the little sibling and I can annoy my big brother/sister whenever I want to!
  • Arrogant Kung-Fu Guy: I can kick your crooked ass with my martial arts skills!
  • Asian Rudeness: ダメな奴だな、てめえは。Translation 
  • "Ass" in Ambassador: I come from another country to tell you foreigners that your country sucks and y'all can fuck off!
  • Asshole Victim: Something terrible has happened to me, and you jerks still don't give a shit about me?! I may be an asshole, but I didn't do anything to directly bring this on myself!
  • Babysitter from Hell: Your parents are away, so I'm the king around this house, you little runt!
  • Babysitter's Nightmare: My parents hired you to babysit me? I'll make you wish you were never born!
  • Bad Influencer: I'm a popular Internet celebrity, so the people endangered and inconvenienced by my actions can kiss my ass!
  • Bad Santa: "Naughty" or "nice"? You're all naughty!
  • Balkan Bastard: Remove kebab!
  • The Barnum: There's a sucker born every minute, and you're one of them! And I'm going to prove it to ya by bleeding your wallet dry with a biiiiii~gggggg smile on my face!
  • Bastard Bastard: I'm an asshole because my shithead parents aren't married!
  • Beauty Is Bad: I'm far more pretty than any of those ugly-ass ogres!
  • The Berserker: I AM DEFEATING YOU- BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!
  • Big Brother Bully: I love tormenting my little twerp of a brother/sister!
  • Big Jerk on Campus: I’m the coolest guy in school, so I’m better than you! So I’ll beat and bully any losers I want!
  • Bigot with a Badge: You're under arrest for being black! Question my authority, and I'll beat your colored ass with my nightstick!
  • Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: What? You thought I was actually a nice person? Ha, I sure played you for an idiot!
    • False Friend: The only reason I ever pretended to be your buddy is because you're just a very gullible and happens-to-be useful mean-to-an-end like the idiots who I can easily fool for my own personal gain.
    • Jerkass at Your Discretion: I'm only being mean now because we're all alone, loser!
  • The Bogan: Da fuck are ya lookin' at, cunts? Shove off outta here if ya don't want a beatdown from down unda', ya bloody gronks!
  • Boomerang Bigot: Everyone of the same kind as I am is full of shit, and I don't give a fuck if that makes me a traitor to their kind!
  • Boyfriend-Blocking Dad: You keep your hands off my daughter! If I catch you so much as kissing her, you'll be very sorry!
  • Bratty Half-Pint: What? You...Refuse to play with me? YOU MUST DIE!
  • Bratty Teenage Daughter: I'm a teenage girl, so why isn't the rest of the world catering to me and my every whims like they should?
  • Brooklyn Rage: I'm from New York and I'm da rudest, meanest, nastiest person on earth and I'll beat ya' head in if ya look at me funny!
  • The Brute: I beat people up for fun!
  • The Caligula: I'm your ruler, don't defy me or I'll have you executed!
  • Card-Carrying Jerkass: I know that I'm a foul-tempered, mean-spirited bastard, and I'm proud of that!
  • Caustic Critic: Anything I review tends to suck, that includes whatever you make, you pathetic creators!
  • Child Hater: I hate kids at least most of the time and I'd like to get rid of those little shits or at least kick one out of its shoes!
    • Teen Hater: I hate those rebellious angsty hormonal monsters too! Stay the fuck away from me if you're in the 13-19 age range!
  • Childhood Memory Demolition Team: Your trite feelings and memoriee of this location mean nothing to me so I'm demolishing it!
  • Choosy Beggar: You say I'm picky? Well suck it the fuck up! I could accept what you gave me, but I have enough standards to know what I really want!
  • Competition Freak: Rise and shine, you lazy motherfuckers! After you all failed to outdo my douchebaggery yesterday, I've decided where the real fun is! We're going to raid an army base and swim across the ocean to a mobile offshore base to drop them off! NOW GET YOUR ASSES GOING! Unless you automatically declare me your superior once again, in which case I'll leave you alone to fight alongside me another day, the last one there is a scummy turd in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere!
  • Complete Monster: I'm utterly vile and rotten to the core and I don't give a shit what anyone has to say about it. Suck on that and watch as I probably will tell others to fuck off if I get the chance!
  • Condescending Calmness: There's no need to get upset. All I'm asking is for something completely unfair, and you can't do anything about it.
  • Cop Hater: Fuck every single one of those pigs!
  • Corrupt Corporate Executive: The only thing I like more than using the company I run to make money is screwing over my worthless employees and the suckers willing to buy my products in every way my devious mind can think of.
  • Corrupted Character Copy: I'm a pastiche of a character from another work of fiction, except I'm a far worse person than the loser I'm imitating.
  • Cranky Landlord: I fucking hate loud, annoying tenants like you living in my apartment and I'd like to kick you out!
  • Cranky Neighbor: I fucking hate living next door to a complete degenerate like you!
  • Crass Canuck: You think Canadians are nice? Well we're not!
  • Crazy Cat Lady: Who needs stupid insufferable people when you can have cats? Leave me alone or I'm hurling a cat at you!
  • Dancing Royalty: You think you're a better dancer than me, the best this night club's ever seen? We'll see about that!
  • Deadpan Snarker: Don't worry, my friend. I'm not going to offend you with my sarcasm, because you're too clueless to understand it.
  • Dean Bitterman: I'm in charge of the school! I don't like students like you, and I would be more than happy to make you suffer here!
  • Defrosting Ice Queen: Get lost. I don't have time to talk with just anyone... On second thought, maybe you're cool to hang around with.
  • Depraved Dentist: I can't promise you won't feel a thing when I pull this tooth! But I can promise you will feel it!
  • Depraved Kids' Show Host: Don't be fooled by the fact that my day job is hosting a children's show. I'm in a miserable mood and have done things so despicable behind your cameras that those network executive yahoos will probably fire me if they knew about my misdeeds!
  • Deranged Park Ranger: Don't break any rules in this park, or I'll kick your ass!
  • Diabolical Dogcatcher: Aww, are you a cute wittle doggie-woggie? Hope you like the pound!
  • Dirty Coward: When I see danger, I run away and I don't care if you jackasses are going to suffer or die! My safety is more important than yours!
  • Doctor's Disgraceful Demotion: They took my medical license because of my ethics violations, but they failed to understand my genius!
  • Dr. Jerk: All I can tell you about this next procedure is that it will be...EXCRUCIATING!!
  • Drill Sergeant Nasty: My job is to act like a major asshole so I can turn pussified street scum and whatnot into ruthless, badass war machines! Now drop and give me 50, maggot!
  • Dry Crusader: The prohibition era should have been more than an era, it should have been always!
  • Dublin Skanger: I come from North Dublin in Ireland, and you're gonna get knifed in two minutes.
  • Eco-Terrorist: Do what's good for the environment or I'll fucking kill you!
  • Ecocidal Antagonist: I'm a bad guy who's so evil that I enjoy polluting the environment and don't care that my actions are destroying the planet!
  • Education Mama: Stop wasting your time with your silly, childish dreams! If I don't see you score As consistently, I will make you study harder, even if it breaks you!
  • Egocentrically Religious: God loves me because I am holier than thou, you wretched sinner!
    • The Fundamentalist: My religion is superior to yours, infidel! Accept my beliefs, or burn in hell!
  • Enemy to All Living Things: I am hostile towards every living thing in my presence, and don't think I won't take advantage of my powers to harm them!
  • Enfant Terrible: Adults are so easy to manipulate! I can do whatever I want to whoever I want, throw tantrums, or manipulate others, because nobody will ever suspect a cute little kid like me!!!
  • Enraged by Idiocy: How can this person be this goddamned stupid?! I'm gonna beat the crap out of you if you don't stop being such an irksome dumbass, you moronic fuckwit!
  • Entitled Bastard: I can treat you however I want to treat you, and I expect you to do stuff for me or else!
  • Entitled to Have You: Who gives a shit if you're in love with someone else? You're mine to do whatever I want!
  • Equal-Opportunity Offender: I shit on whoever I feel like, regardless of if they're black, white, Asian, Hispanic, male, female, non-binary, straight, gay, bi, a pansy, whatever!
  • Eviler than Thou: We're the superior villains here, so scram, amateurs!
  • Experience Entitlement: I'm more experienced in this thing than you are, so I have every right to look down on you!
  • The Ex's New Jerkass: I'm with your ex now and I'm going to treat you like garbage while rubbing my relationship in your face.
  • Fan Hater: You're a fan of this crap? You're probably a loser who needs to get a life!
  • Fantasy-Forbidding Father: Son, how many times must I tell you to stop getting carried away with your pointless hobbies? Listen to me right now, or You Are Grounded!!
  • Fat Bastard: Hey, don't you dare call me a fatass, you piece of shit! Now go and bring me more food right now, dammit!
  • Fetishized Abuser: I'm abusive to my love interest and it's sexy!
  • Fetus Terrible: Don't think I can't hate you right from inside the womb because I sure as hell can!
  • Fiery Redhead: You certainly shall not mess with me, because I have red hair!
  • Fighting Irish: Imma Irish, so git da fuck oot or else I will kill ya!
  • Frat Bro: I live and breathe being in a fraternity and can be as big as an asshole as I want!
  • French Jerk: Je leur dis des putains de misérables: Vas te faire enculer, salope. Translation: 
  • The Friend Nobody Likes: My dumb friends hate me, but who gives a damn? I'm still in their little social circle.
  • Friendship-Hating Antagonist: You losers actually rely on friendships and bonds to get ahead in life? Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting.
  • Fun-Hating Confiscating Adult: Damn you, kids! Keep your toys away from my yard, or I will take them away, and you'll never see them again!
  • The Gadfly: I wanna do it because it's fun, it's fun to do bad things, like embarrassing other people just to get them to react!
  • Girlboss Feminist: I'm a strong independent High-Powered Career Woman with a lot of money, so respect me or else you're misogynist!
  • Gold Digger: Haha!! You really thought a bombshell like me would actually "love" an ugly shmuck like you? I married you for your money and nothing else, you clown! Now go work and get some more money so I can spend it because I'm not doing anything ever and you will like it!!
  • Good Is Not Nice: Yeah, yeah. I'm a hero who saves the day, but that doesn't mean I'm a nice guy, so get a clue, or buzz off!
  • Grammar Nazi: Your grammar sucks! Fix it now, you uneducated fool!
  • Greedy Televangelist: I just love using religion to dupe suckers into giving me their money!
  • Green and Mean: My skin color is green and I hate yours...or at least enough peoples' guts!
  • Griefer: I vandalize and terrorize Online Games because I can, sometimes with groups participating.
  • The Grinch: I despise Christmas and am willing to ruin the holiday for everyone who's celebrating it because I am that petty!
  • Gruesome Grandparent: Not only do I treat my children like crap, but I treat all their children like crap, too!
  • Grumpy Old Man: I'm an old man/woman and I hate everything about life in the modern world. Now get off my lawn, you stupid kids!
  • Greed: Mine, Mine, MINE!
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: It takes little for a number of things to piss me off, you being one of them!
  • Handsome Lech: Step aside, sister! I ought to call up my stylist and make an appointment for you, and I refuse to get out of your way until you show me every single pimple and imperfection on that ever-so mysterious body of yours! Starting with your—OWWW!
  • Harsh Talent Show Judge: A subpar talent show performance? Get off the stage, you honking pig!
  • Hate Sink: I'm a douche just so you viewers sitting on your dirty couches can have someone to hate.
  • Hates Everyone Equally: Oh yeah? I hate you and everyone else, no matter who you are!
  • Hated by All: I'm such a jerk that nobody likes me. Whatever! I hate them all right back!
  • Hates Reading: Reading's for sissies! I'd sooner wipe my butt with this manual's pages than read it to learn what I need to know!
  • The Heckler: BOO! Your performance stinks!
  • Hero Killer: I'm a villain renowned for killing heroes and it's glorious!
  • Heteronormative Crusader: Being gay means that you're cursed, or possessed by a demon!
  • Holier Than Thou: I am much higher than all of you sinners! Begone!
  • Hollywood Atheist: We atheists support science and logic! We're way too smart for that fairy tale garbage you Christards believe!
  • Hope Crusher: I enjoy crushing your hopes and watch you fall into despair! Hahahaha!
  • Hot-Blooded: NOT ONLY I AM ENTHUSIASTIC, BUT I AM ALSO MEAN!!!
  • Hypocrite: I will assert a point and then contradict it immediately after! I don't care if it makes me completely inconsistent!
  • The Idiot from Osaka: I come from Osaka and fuck your mannerisms and politeness you Tokyoite!
  • Indispensable Scoundrel: I'm shadier than a rain forest but the good guys need me around because of who and what I know and what I can do.
  • Ineffectual Loner: A wolf needn't bring themselves down by associating with sheep.
  • Insufferable Genius: I look down on average folk, who look like dimwits because I'm a genius!
  • Insufferable Imbecile: Duuh, I would rather hit my head with a hammer and break shit than hang out with these bitches!
  • Intentional Heartbreaker: I date people just for the pleasure of breaking up with them, though they should be lucky I even bothered to talk to them at all!
  • Internet Jerk: I'm an asshole because it's the internet (or any other anonymous setting) and I can say whatever the fuck I want! If you're offended, then too bad, stay butthurt!
  • Invisible Jerkass: You can't see me, haha! That means I can use my invisibility to do mean things to you!
  • It's All About Me: This index is all about how great I am, forget the rest!
  • Jackass Genie: I'm here to grant you three wishes, but I can do whatever I want to you when granting them. Be Careful What You Wish For, sucker!
  • Jerk Jock: I'm the alpha male of high school! Get out of my way, you wimps, or I'll kick your ass!
  • Jerk Sue: No matter how much of a dick I am, all these dipshits still worship the fucking ground I walk on, invokedcuz I'm perfect and they know it!
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Sure, I'm liable to act like or flat-out be an asshole, but I can be a nice guy every now and then.
  • Jerkass Gods: Worship me, thine weak-looking, pitiful mortal, or I'll smite you!
  • Jerkass Woobie: My life sucks! What? I don't need your damn pity! Get the hell away from me!
  • Karma Houdini: I'll never get my comeuppance for being an asshole! I dare you to stop me if you can, which I'm certain you will fail!
  • Karmic Butt-Monkey: Why do all bad things happen to me? The assholes are them, not me!
  • Karmic Trickster: I love tricking my annoying rivals like you!
  • Kids Are Cruel: I'm 8 years old and I find it fun to pick on people or hate them! I wanna kill you all!
    • Teens Are Monsters: Well, I'm 16 and I hate you just as much! I love making everyone miserable!
  • The Killjoy: I hate happy people, and I'll do whatever it takes to sour the mood!
  • Knight Templar: You can't call me a jerkass or a villain despite dangerous things I might do, I'm a hero and the end will justify the means!
    • Tautological Templar: I don't give a fuck what everybody says! I'm a good guy so everything I do is good because I say so!
  • Killer Robot: I’m a robot who wishes to kill all you humans, bitches!
  • Lean and Mean: I may not be big and strong, but I still fucking hate your ass no matter what the fuck I look like!
  • Light Is Not Good: These morons think that just because I look sweet and innocent on the outside, that makes me benevolent on the inside. (Sigh) What a bunch of suckers...
  • Lower-Class Lout: I'm poor and don't have much money, but you know what? Fuck you!
  • Manipulative Bastard: I can trick you into doing whatever I want you to do, because you're a gullible fool who believes whatever they're told.
  • Mayor Pain: I'm the mayor of this town, but I don't really care for what happens as long as I don't have to waste money.
  • Mean Boss: Troper, you're a minute late! What do I pay useless idiots like you for? Now get your lazy ass back to work, or else you're fired!
    • Bad Boss: Any worthless employees who disappoint me are going to suffer my wrath, preferably in a very painful way. Now get back to work, or I will literally kill all of you!
  • Moral Guardians: Blasphemous! Offensive! Put an end to this right now, or else we'll do it by force!
  • Moral Myopia: You asshole! How dare you do that horrible thing to me! I should be doing that to you!
  • Morally Bankrupt Banker: I'll do anything for money, even if it involves extortion!
  • The Napoleon: Are you mocking my height, you meathead? If so, then I'll have you executed!
  • Narcissist: Get used to it bitches, I know I look good! And guess what? The world really does revolve around ME, not you.
  • The Neidermeyer: I fucking hate those faggots that call themselves soldiers and I don't give three shits if they feel the same way about me!
  • Nerdy Bully: You think I'm a dorky geek? Fuck off, you're the real loser!
  • Niceness Denial: No, that was not a nice thing I did, I was actually trying to screw you off and make you the laughing stock of the year! ... How did that backfire?
  • Northern Irish and Nasty: You're gonna have Troubles if you fuck with me, pal.
  • Not-So-Well-Intentioned Extremist: Unlike the well-intentioned extremist, I can't be bothered to justify my acts of terrorism with altruistic reasons! Instead, I will claim altruism, but act on the philosophy that It's All About Me!
  • Nouveau Riche: I got all this money and you ain't getting shit from it!
  • Obnoxious Entitled Housewife: I don't have to care about anybody else! I'm a member of the homeowners' association!
  • Obnoxious In-Laws: Why did my son/daughter marry that bitch/bastard?!
  • Obstructive Bureaucrat: I don't care if this delays you from averting a life or death situation. File the paperwork properly or I won't let you save your friend's life!
  • Obstructive Zealot: I zealously pursue a higher goal and reject anything and everything that doesn't jibe with the Truth that I know!
  • Omnicidal Neutral: You dare declare me an enemy because I won't pick a side? I'll just kill all of you, then!
  • Opportunistic Vendors: I'll take any opportunity to hawk my wares, no matter how rude, greedy and/or inappropriate it is!
  • Orderlies are Creeps: I just love using my job as an excuse to treat patients like worthless wastes of oxygen where they lie!
  • The Paranoiac: People like you are full of shit, because I know you're out to get me! So I have every right to antagonize people!
  • The Perfectionist: I want everything to be perfect... or else I WILL FIRE YOU!!!
  • Phony Veteran: I lie about or exaggerate my experience in the military to look good!
  • Plastic Bitch: I've done plastic surgery on my face, and now I'm prettier than you!
  • Police Are Useless: I'm the police, but I am severely incompetent and don't want to do my job. Screw justice!
    • Rabid Cop: I like to beat the shit out of punks who step an inch out of line!
    • Dirty Cop: I don't care for upholding the law, I'm just abusing my position to commit crimes of my own!
    • Killer Cop: ...Or worse, I'll use it to kill people!
  • Political Correctness Is Evil: What's with the political correct attitude? You look like a sissy! Cut that out at once!
  • Politically Incorrect Hero: Just because I'm a good guy doesn't mean I'll treat all kinds of people nicely, so don't get all PC at me when I talk bad about any of you!
  • Politically Incorrect Villain: I'm the bad guy, so that means I proudly hate certain kinds of people with a passion!
  • Political Overcorrectness: All of this is offensive! Change it at once or else we'll make you do it by force!
  • President Evil: I'm in charge of the country, so I can abuse my power and treat my constituents like trash all I want!
  • The Prima Donna: You bozos aren't anything special! Only I am because I'm the star of the show!
  • Profanity Police: Did you just cuss? I'll punish you severely if you don't start watching your language!
  • The Proud Elite: I'm handsome, fit, intelligent, sophisticated, and rich. I also don't like low-life losers such as them.
  • Psychopathic Manchild: I'm not a child, I'm a grown-ass man! So shut your fucking mouth calling me immature, you bitch-ass retard!
  • Pulling Your Child Away: Don't you dare come near my child, you filthy brute!
  • Rambunctious Italian: Im-a mean Italian, and you dont-a piss me off or-a else I will-a punch ya!
  • Red Is Violent: Red is the color of blood, and that will be yours—all over the floor!
  • Reformed, but Not Tamed: Just because I'm no longer the bad guy doesn't mean I'm going to soften up and not be a grouch!
  • Resentful Guardian: You annoying little shit! It's all your fault that I'm not living out my dreams and now I'm stuck raising your little ass!
  • Rich Bitch: I'm very wealthy, and I enjoy looking down on lowly commoners from the comfort of my mansion.
    • Royal Brat: I'm royalty, so I deserve everything that you dirty peasants can never have!
  • The Rival: I'm not the main villain, but I hate stupid pathetic losers, which is what you look like and would love to kick your ass at any chance! And more importantly, I want to prove I'm better than you!
  • Sadist Teacher: It's so much fun treating students like crap.
  • Sadist: I just LOVE watching you suffer in pain and misery!
  • Sassy Black Woman: I'm a strong black woman and I say what I want, when I want, how I want! If you gotta problem with that, then get yo' wimpy ass outta my way!
  • Schlubby, Scummy Security Guard: Security guards are pathetic assholes.
  • Schoolyard Bully All Grown Up: I love tormenting everyone even when I'm an adult!
  • Screw Politeness, I'm a Senior!: I'm a senior citizen, therefore, I can act like an asshole however, whenever and to whomever I want. Respect your elders, you little whippersnappers!
  • Sensei for Scoundrels: You face an opponent on the streets or in competition, they are the enemy, and the enemy deserves no mercy. Is that understood?
  • Sex Is Evil, and I Am Horny: You filthy whore! Provoking my desire by dressing all sexy like that? Very well, you asked for it, you will satisfy me. Now.
  • Silver Spoon Troublemaker: I'm going to causes so much trouble and you can't do anything about it because my parent's a public figure!
  • Sir Swears-a-Lot: I just fucking love to fucking swear! And if some fucking shitty ass motherfuckers don't like it and are butthurt about my swearing, they can go fuck your fucking selves, the fuckin' fucked up fuckfaced goddamn dipshits!
  • Slimeball: A sleazy, and morally-slippery character.
  • Small-Town Tyrant: I'm the sherrif of this backwoods town so I get to do whatever I want!
  • Smarmy Host: A vain slimeball of a show's host.
  • Smooth-Talking Talent Agent: I butter up my clients and ditch them once I no longer see any need to exploit them.
  • Smug Snake: It feelssssss ssssssso good to be a nasssssssty and prideful basssssssstard, wouldn't you sssssssssay?
  • Smug Straight Edge: Purify now or else we will purify you!
  • Soapbox Sadie: Listen up, you privileged shit, I am going to lecture you for a long time, and you need to be always listening!
  • The Social Darwinist: Don't be a pathetic weakling. I'm much stronger than the rest, who don't deserve any mercy. Only the tough survive.
  • The Sociopath: I don't care about morality, empathy, compassion, or any of those horse-shit ideals. I only look out for me, myself, and I.
  • The Soulless: I literally don't have a soul, so I can't feel any empathy or remorse.
  • Sour Outside, Sad Inside: Get the fuck away from me! Sob...
  • Sour Prudes: You actually like this? Heh, heh! We are kinkshaming you right now!
  • Spartan Sibling: I'm not going to help you deal with your little problems! Suck it up and deal with them yourself!
  • Spicy Latina: ¡Soy una mujer española, así que si me molestas, te golpeo! translation 
  • Spoiled Brat: My mommy and daddy give me everything I want, and I'm gonna rub it all in your stupid face! HA HA!
  • "Stop Having Fun" Guys: You annoy me by enjoying this game! I play it to show that I'm better than you all!
    • Scrub: My game, my rules! Deal with it!
  • Straw Critic: Your movie sucks because it doesn't meet my impossibly high standards!
  • Straw Feminist: Men are nothing but sexist pigs and it's up to us feminists to show them their place!
    • Does Not Like Men: Fuck all men! (No, I don't mean that way, you perverts!) You're pigs and the worst this world has to offer!
  • Straw Misogynist: I'm a sexist prick towards women whose only purpose is to be proven wrong!
    • He-Man Woman Hater: You women suck (not just literally) and don't think the SJWs will save you!
  • Straw Vegetarian: You eat meat? Then that makes you an inhuman monster who deserves scorn for thriving off the suffering of poor innocent animals who don't know nothin'! Go vegan or fuck off!
  • Straw Vulcan: We ain't nuh carin' bout yer wittle fee fees! Feelingz 'ar fit for pussiez!
  • The Svengali: I'm a bastard of a master who exploits and abuses my pupils for personal gain!
  • Tech Bro: Wild party last night, dude? What do you mean our tech screwed over a bunch of people?
  • Terminally-Ill Criminal: Since I don't have much time left in this world, I may as well do some really evil shit before I croak!
  • Thin-Skinned Bully: I like to be mean to other people, but cry like a baby when I'm given a taste of my own medicine.
  • Time-Traveling Jerkass: I like to use time travel to do whatever the hell I want because I know nobody can stop me. And if I'm ruining the lives of the people I hate (or even straight up erasing them from existence) by doing so, even better!
  • Token Evil Teammate: I'm part of a group of good guys, but I'm nothing like those goody-two-shoes!
  • Troll: I love pissing people off! Especially when I don't care for something I just saw, so I'm fishing for reactions! (Sees picture of a Green Troll Monster and facepalms) Not that kind of Troll, noob!
  • Troubled Abuser: I treat you like crap, but it's because I was treated like crap in the past.
  • Tsundere: What?! It's not like I'm describing this trope for you or anything! And it's not like I have a soft side, so get it through your head, OKAY! But I appreciate you for reading this, though.
  • Trumplica: I'm a yellow-haired millionaire who's full of himself and throws his weight around!
  • The Unapologetic: I'm not sorry for being an asshole!
  • Uncleanliness Is Next to Ungodliness: I don't give a shit how bad I smell, you piece of shit! I'll smell however the fuck I want! And you're gonna have to take my disgusting body odor like a man, you squeaky clean pussy!
  • The Unfettered: I'm gonna get what I want, and I don't care who I have to step on or who suffers to get it!
  • Ungrateful Bastard: You think I'm gonna thank you for saving me? Piss off! I still hate you and I should kick your ass!
  • Unsatisfiable Customer: This is not how I want my food to be like, you dolt! Your food sucks! Why would they hire an idiot like you?!
  • Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist: I'm an asshole, but these fans stupidly find me hilarious!
  • The Upper Crass: I'm an aristocrat, part of the royal family, and I can do whatever I want!
  • Van Helsing Hate Crimes: All monsters are evil freaks who deserve to die, so I'll kill all of them indiscriminately, even if they weren't intentionally hurting anyone!
  • Vengeful Abandoned Toy: You forgot about me when you grew up? After we were best friends during your entire childhood?! I'll Kill You!
  • Very Punchable Man: You want to slug me so badly because I'm an asshole? I'd love to see any sissy try!
  • Villainy-Free Villain: I may not be a damn villain or anything, but I am such an unscrupulous, despicable douchebag, that you can still consider me one!
  • Violent Glaswegian: Well, dinnae touch me or else I will punch yer butt out!
  • Warts and All: What?! You really thought I was some Knight in Shining Armor? Get your head out of the clouds... are you a fuckwit or what?!
  • White Hair, Black Heart: My hair is white, out of my way!
  • Wicked Stepmother: I'm now the woman that matters in your father's life! Accept absolute subservience to me or be sent to boarding school, your choice!
  • Wiki Vandal: Imma vandalize the pages I edit by inserting false information or inflammatory statements just to get under the other editors' skins!

    Groups of Jerks 
  • Aliens Are Bastards: We came from outer space to dominate or maybe kill all of you while we probably use stock phrases like... Puny Earthlings!
  • All of the Other Reindeer: We don't like you because you're different from the rest of us, and we'll find safety in numbers and treat you however we want to treat you!
  • Animal Wrongs Group: Every single animal on the planet has a right to live, except you disgusting humans!
  • Apathetic Citizens: We got better things to do than to help save some homeless people.
  • Car Load Of Cool Kids: What a better way to let you know someone's a total loser than to have me and my cool friends mock them while sitting in our cool car and can drive off before they can come up with a response?
  • Chilly Reception: We don't like you, new guy! And we're going to make your stay here miserable!
  • Corrupt Church: If anyone dares to cross us, we will condemn them to Hell!
  • Gang of Bullies: We love to bully others who are weaker than us!
  • Girl Posse: We girls are, like, totally fabulous and we've got no problem humiliating weirdos like you!
  • Humans Are Bastards: We're humans and we're assholes! Get used to it because we're everywhere on this planet full of shit, that's meant to be abused!
  • Popular Is Evil: We're popular at school, so of course we're gonna bully all the losers below us on the Popularity Food Chain!
  • Thug Dojo: Screw that lame "journey for enlightenment or martial pacifism" bullshit; we practice real martial arts in this dojo and show the enemy no mercy!
  • "Ugly American" Stereotype: We're Americans and we can act however we want to act in your country, so deal with it!
  • Ungrateful Townsfolk: You saved our lives and we will repay you by chasing you out of town! YAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!
  • Untrusting Community: We don't like you, visitor! Leave our town!
  • World of Jerkass: I may be a jerk, but so are you! And him, and her, and them too...

    Jerks in Pairings or Ensembles 

    Mean Animals 
See Scary Animals Index for ones that are outright evil.
  • Angry, Angry Hippos: Grrrrr... (I'll crush you for daring to cross my territory!)
  • Animals Hate Him: We animals hate you and we're going to get you!
  • Animal Stampede: We animals don't give a fuck and we'll run over you!
  • Angry Guard Dog: WARRWF! SNARRRLLLL!!!! (Back off my yard, or I'll bite you!)
  • Apathetic Pet: I don't give any real shit about my owner or their well-being!
  • Bee Afraid: BZZ! We're gonna sting you for no reason!
  • Beware of Vicious Dog: Woof! GRRRRRRRR! Woof! GRRRRRRRRRR!! (I hate every outsider and I'm going to bite them!)
  • Brutish Bulls: (Back off or I'll charge at you!)
  • Bully Bulldog: Woof! Woof! GRRRRRR! (I love to push around cats and smaller dogs!)
  • Cats Are Mean: MEEERRRRROOOOOOWWWWW!! (I hate you and I want to scratch your face!)
  • Cats Are Superior: Meow. Hiss. (I am by far the best animal in the world.)
  • Cocky Rooster: (Don't underestimate us chickens! I'll peck on your flesh too!)
  • Cruel Coyotes: Aaah-ooooooooooooo!! (I'm gonna go after your little kid when they're outside!)
  • Cruel Elephant: BrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (I am the king of the jungle, and you all are filthy little pests.)
  • Deceptively Cute Critter: I will act adorable so I can get something from you dumb humans!
  • Devious Dolphins (Hehehe, I'm not afraid to bully anyone under the seas. Just ask those porpoises, if they escaped somehow!)
  • Foul Waterfowl: *Honk! Honk! Hisssssssss! Honk!* (Get near me and I'll fuck you up!)
  • Gruesome Goat: (Get the fuck out or I will buck you into bits!)
  • A Mischief of Mice: Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak! (Come on, boys! Let's steal all of the food from the refrigerator and pin the blame on the cat!)
  • Mister Muffykins: GRRRRR... Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! (Get off or I'll bite you and scratch your face!)
  • Proud Peacock (I'm bragging how good us peacocks are!)
  • Screwball Squirrel: Chirp! (I am a squirrel, but I can hit you with nuts!)
  • Sinister Swine: OINK! (Get off my farm or I'll bite and trample you!)
  • Wily Walrus: Grrr... (Get off my iceberg, or I'll impale you just like I ate those cute little oysters!)
  • Xenophobic Herbivore (You carnivores and omnivores are dangerous, if not worthless pests.)
  • You Dirty Rat!: Squeak! Squeak! (I'll steal your food, spread diseases, and ruin everything you love!)

    Things That Jerks Do 
  • Abomination Accusation Attack: I'm going to falsely accuse you of doing or being something horrible, and thanks to mob mentality, the public will side with me and refuse to listen to your side of the story!
  • Academia Elitism: Your education is pathetic compared to mine!
  • Accentuate the Negative: The flaws piss me off so much, I'm not going to even bother acknowledging the merits!
  • Ad Hominem: You and your argument aren't worth jack shit!
  • Adoption Diss: Your parents aren't your real parents, idiot!
  • Affair? Blame the Bastard: You little bastard! It's your fault my wife had an affair!
  • All Gays Are Pedophiles: I'm a homophobe willing to make things rough for gay people by falsely accusing them of preying on kids!
  • All Take and No Give: I like to take everything from you, and give nothing in return. You gotta deal with it!
  • Amputative Sentencing: Any thieves I catch in the act can say goodbye to their hands!
  • And There Was Much Rejoicing: We're so glad you died! Let's celebrate it!
  • And Your Little Dog, Too!: Just to show you how much of an asshole I am, I'm gonna threaten the lives of your loved ones in front of you!
  • Angrish: Fuck you, idiotic per-ghkgkgjsisdjjtjtjfff... RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHH!!!
  • Animal Testing: I test on puny animal earthlings to emphasize my rudeness!
  • Appeal to Force: I'm in charge here, and you better follow my orders and agree with me or else I will hit you!
  • At Least I Admit It: Yeah, I might be an asshole, but at least I don't bother hiding it like a pussy!
  • Attractiveness Discrimination: I only go out with pretty people, not with ugly losers like you, so get lost!
  • Atomic F-Bomb: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Backhanded Apology: I'm sorry if this page offended anyone's limp-wristed feelings.
  • Bad Mood as an Excuse: Something pissed me off! I'll take my frustrations out on everyone, especially you!
  • Bad People Abuse Animals: I just love hurting these hapless-looking creatures! ...Damn dog! (throws a kick)
  • Bad Review Threat: If you don't give me what I want, I'll write a bad review about your business!
  • Bait-and-Switch Compassion: That's terrible about what happened to you... and I enjoy it! Hahahaha!
  • Bait the Dog: Look, I'm doing something nice...but only so I can do something really reprehensible!
  • Baldness Mockery: Piss off, chrome-dome!
  • Beg the Dog: Maybe I'm a little rough on you but please, help me out here.
  • Big, Stupid Doodoo-Head: You and your stupid brain should know better than to mess with me, you doo-doo brained, pee-pee-breathed poopyface!
  • Bitch Slap: What better way to make someone my little bitch than to slap you across your pathetic face?!
  • Blaming the Victim: I don't give a damn that some asshole decided to beat/rob/rape/do other horrible things to you. It's your own fault for being such a vulnerable wuss, and you were probably asking for it anyway!
  • Bratty Food Demand: I may be spoiled, badly brought-up, very young, or just plain impolite, but I don't care! Just gimme my food now!
  • Brutal Honesty: What's the matter? Are your feelings hurt because I told you the truth? Too bad! It's a dog-eat-dog world!
  • Bullying the Disabled: You're crippled? I'll pick on you for that then.
  • But for Me, It Was Tuesday: I killed your father? Maybe... but like I remember whether or not I did because I'm too busy committing atrocities everyday to care about who I killed in particular!
  • Buy or Get Lost: If you're not here to buy anything from me then beat it.
  • Blackmail: Do my bidding fuckhead, or else I’ll tell the police that one time you had overdue library books!
  • Calling Parents by Their Name: I call my parents by their given names to show I don't respect them enough to refer to them as "Mom" and "Dad".
  • Callousness Towards Emergency: You need help? Screw that! That's your problem, not mine!
  • Catchphrase Insult: What could be a trademark insult for this person? I know! I'll call that one "loser" because it'll never be successful in life. I'll also call him or her "idiot" since they're stupid as fuck!
  • The Chain of Harm: Someone more powerful than me treated me like crap, so I'll just treat you like crap you because you're weaker than me, and you'll eventually mistreat another person weaker than you and so on!
  • Complaining About Rescues They Don't Like: You might have saved me, but don't think for a moment that I'm going to be thankful to you!
  • Condescending Compassion: You poor thing. Wasting your life rotting your miniscule brain by reading this page instead of doing something worthy of value. You have my pity.
  • Corporal Punishment: I'll bring physical pain onto you until you behave yourself, and don't you even start crying!
  • *Cough* Snark *Cough*: I openly insult someone, but make a half-assed effort of covering up my remark by sandwiching my rude statement between feigned coughs.
  • Cowardice Callout: You don't want to face your challenges like a man? What a pussy you are!
  • Crocodile Tears: Gotcha! Did you actually think I was crying?!
  • Cruelty by Feet: Kicking them while they're down is fun! Why shouldn't I do it?
  • Crush the Keepsake: I'll crush your precious little keepsake just to show how much of a bastard I am!
  • Cyberbullying: I'm gonna make you cry as your reputation in social media goes to crap! And nobody will believe you! Hahahaha!
  • Dartboard of Hate: What better way to show how much I hate someone's guts than to throw darts at a dartboard with a picture of yall's ugly-ass face attached to it?
  • Dear Negative Reader: Oh, you don't like my work? Well, fuck you, too!
  • Defacement Insult: To insult you, I'll spray some mean words about you on the wall so you can see them!
  • Dehumanizing Insult: You're not a human; you're a worthless pig!
  • Desecrating the Dead: To show how much I hate you, I like to do horrible things to your dead carcass!
  • Despotism Justifies the Means: I don't give a damn what happens to the world or its citizens, as long as I take over it for myself!
  • Disability as an Excuse for Jerkassery: I can treat anyone like shit whenever I want because I'm disabled!
  • Dislikes the New Guy: You're new here, huh? Well, guess what? I don't like you, and you don't belong here! Now fuck off!
  • Disproportionate Restitution: Here, I'm compensating you to make up for my past actions... what the hell do you mean, it's not enough? How ungrateful can you be?!
  • Disproportionate Retribution: I'm getting revenge on you over the pettiest shit!
  • Disrupting the Theater: Screw you guys, I'm not staying quiet in the theater!
  • Domestic Abuse: I can do whatever the hell I want with my own family, like beating them to a pulp!
  • Don't Make Me Take My Belt Off!: If I catch you misbehaving, I will literally whip your ass, you annoying little shit-bastard!
  • Dumped via Text Message: I'm just going to dump you over text because I'm too much of a Dirty Coward to do it in person!
  • Dying Declaration of Hate: Before I die... I just want to tell you something... I hate your fucking guts. *Dies*
  • Dystopia Justifies the Means: I make life hell for everyone who walks this very earth and enjoy seeing them suffer!
  • Eat the Dog: I'm willing to sacrifice my pet and put them on my dinner plate just to save my own skin!
  • Elder Abuse: I don't respect those old farts, and I'll treat them however the hell I want!
  • Enemy Eats Your Lunch: I demonstrate what an inconsiderate shithead I am by taking your food and eating it in front of you!
  • Evil Is Petty: Besides plotting for world domination, I do other things like kicking your puppy and being an all around jerk just because I can!
  • Excrement Statement: Just to show you how much sick I am of you, I'm going to take a piss and a shit in your mouth!
  • Evil Feels Good: Bahahaha! I enjoy being evil! Feels so good, isn’t it? Being a low-functioning dastardly villain who indulges in reprehensibly evil crimes on a daily basis? Heh
  • Evil Has a Bad Sense of Humor: I'm a villain who's trying to be comedic, but I am either too psychopathic to understand what humor is or my humor is in severely poor taste. I don't really care, though!
  • Failure-to-Save Murder: I blame you for causing a loved one to die solely because you failed to prevent their death!
  • False Rape Accusation: I'm gonna lie that you sexually violated me, because I know it will make you look like a monster and that it will be real difficult for you to prove your innocence.
  • Family Extermination: Because of how you slighted me, I'm going to kill you and your entire family!
  • The Farmer and the Viper: You saved my life ...I'll repay your unwise act of kindness by stabbing you in the damn back!
  • Faux Affably Evil: Hello, my dear enemy! Would you kindly say your last words before I happily kill you in a very painful way?
  • Feeling Oppressed by Their Existence: This group never did me any harm, but I hate those bastards anyways because, why not?
  • Fetishes Are Weird: Anyone with a fetish is a fucking weirdo!
  • Financial Abuse: I'm going to use your money as I see fit and you can't stop me!
  • Flame War: We argue about topics, whether petty or contentious, to retaliate or maybe piss everyone off!
  • Flaw Exploitation: I stomp on moralistic pussies to fulfill my own selfish goals!
  • Flippant Forgiveness: I forgive you for being such a feeble-minded buffoon.
  • Flipping the Bird: You see how I'm holding my middle fingers up? It's because I'm sick of your shit, so fuck you!
  • Force Feeding: Here! Eat this food and don't you dare spit it out!
  • For the Evulz: I treat you like shit just because I can, and boy do I really enjoy doing it!
  • Forced Miscarriage: Aw, you're having a baby? Too bad! I'm gonna beat you so bad it'll kill the ankle-biter before it's even born!
  • The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You: I am beating you, shitfaced idiot! (turns to viewer) YOU THINK I'M WEAK, BOORISH DUMBASS!?
  • The Freelance Shame Squad: Your pain and suffering makes me laugh!
  • Frivolous Lawsuit: I'm going to sue your ass over something ridiculously trivial!
  • Gaslighting: What the hell is wrong with you? You're losing your mind! Hahahaha! What an idiot!
  • Gendered Insult: Stop being such a girl and man the hell up, you weak little sissies!
  • George Jetson Job Security: I will fire you from your job for looking at me!
  • Get Out!: I don't want to see you again; now get the hell outta my sight! And that other one...fuck off
  • Glasses Curiosity: Gimme those glasses or I'll break 'em!
  • Hates Their Parent: Fuck mom and dad! They can die a slow and painful death for all I care!
  • Height Insult: Piss off, you tiny little microscopic midget! You ant-sized bitch!
  • "The Hero Sucks" Song: The best way to humiliate a hero is to sing a song about how much of a loser they really are!
  • Hidden Heart of Gold: I'm a jerk, but I've done some pretty nice things. Tell anyone about this and I'll put your ass on life support!
  • Homophobic Hate Crime: I like doing horrible things to whom I deem faggots!
  • Honor-Related Abuse: You dare to dishonor our family?! We'll burn you alive!
  • Hulking Out: I AM NOW A JERK, AND I AM TURNING INTO A MONSTER!!! HULK SMASH!!!
  • Hypocritical Heartwarming: How dare you mess with my loved ones! Only I'm allowed to do that!
  • I Banged Your Mom: I piss you off by claiming I had sex with your mother!
  • If You're So Evil, Eat This Kitten!: If you're evil like you claim you are, you are to kill our enemies to prove you're one of us!
  • Ignored Epiphany: Maybe I should stop being such an irksome douche. (scoffs) Yeah, right!
  • I'll Kill You!: Don't get me on my bad side, or else I'll end you!
  • I'm Standing Right Here: I hate your worthless ass so much that I don't give a shit when you're around to hear me while I say bad things about you!
  • In Love with Looks: I don't like you for your personality. I only want your body!
  • Insidious Rumor Mill: What better way to turn your loved ones against you than by spreading rumors about you?
  • Irrational Hatred: I hate you for no reason at all, but I don't give a damn! I hate you and that's all that matters!
  • It Amused Me: I just enjoy being an asshole!
  • It Is Beyond Saving: This place is way too screwed up to improve. I'm so jaded the only sensible solution I see is to tear it all down and start over with a clean slate.
  • "It" Is Dehumanizing: You are a patheticly subhuman thing that deserves to be treated like dirt!
  • Jabba Table Manners: MMMMmmmmmmm!!Wwhat?! Can' you thee I'm ea'in' heah?! Ffuck off! I don' give a thit if I go'th foo-th in my mouth! If you thith grothed out by my ea'in, then you-ah a whi'yee bith! (food spits into your face)
  • Jerkass to One:
    • Cruel to One: I'm nice to everyone except that loser right there!
    • Crueler to One: I treat everyone like shit, but I like doing that to you the most!
    • Boss's Unfavorite Employee: I'm good to my employees except you! You're the absolute worst and I'd like to fire you or better yet make your life miserable!
    • Teacher's Unfavorite Student: I hate having you in my class, so I'll give you as much detention and homework as I can!
  • Jerk Justifications: I have good reasons to be a jerk!
  • Jerks Use Body Spray: I think it smells good—don't you, baby?
  • "Just Joking" Justification: You got butthurt because I treated you like a crap? C'mon, it's just a joke! Why so serious?
  • Kick the Dog: Just to show you how much of a heartless prick I am, I like doing mean things like kicking little puppies for no good reason...But sometimes not even literally!
  • Lending a Backhand: Let me help you, pal! *Attacks you* Hahahaha!
  • Lack of Empathy: I don't know or care about your feelings!
    • No Sympathy: I don't care about your little pain and sufferings, so get over it, you whiny bitches!
  • Last Disrespects: I'll attend your funeral just to celebrate the end of your worthless life. I might even drag my bum across and then piss on your grave!
  • Lethal Negligence: Who cares if people get hurt because I neglected my "obligations?" I don't feel like working!
  • Life Isn't Fair: Aww, did something bad happen to you? Well, guess what? Life isn't fair! Welcome aboard!
  • Malicious Misnaming: So I told that person, "Hello, Tvdoper!" That sounds better than Tvtroper.
  • Malicious Slander: What better way to ruin your life than to tell lies about you?
  • Manipulative Editing: I edit footage of people to either make it look like they're on my side or to ruin their reputations by making it look like they said terrible things.
  • Marital Rape License: We're married, so whenever I feel like having sex with you, you have no right to decline my request for intercourse!
  • Maternal Death? Blame the Child!: You killed my wife when you came out of her womb! I hate you, you little runt!
  • Mocking the Mourner: Your loss is my opportunity to taunt you or berate you.
  • Mooning: I'm gonna flash my ass in front of your face just to taunt you!
  • Murder by Inaction: I know I could easily save this guy's life, but it would benefit me a lot more if I just let the bastard die, so fuck him!
  • Never My Fault: I never did anything wrong, only you...and those other guys! And even if I did do something, all of you made me do it, so it's your fault by proxy!
  • No Indoor Voice: YOU ARE THE WORST PERSON I HAVE EVER HEARD, FUCKER!!!
  • Not Blood, Not Family: We don't share DNA, so stop acting like my family, you stranger!
  • Offended by an Inferior's Success: You are supposed to be below me, so therefore you have no right to be better than me!
  • Offing the Offspring: I never liked my sack-of-shit children, so I have no problem ending their lives!
  • One-Winged Angel: YOU SHALL PAY FOR THAT, YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER! I'M NOW TURNING INTO A DEMON!!!
  • Only Cares About Inheritance: I don't care about some corpse, just gimme that inheritance!
  • Period Shaming: You got your period? God, you're so disgusting, why would you do that?
  • Petty Childhood Grudge: I'm still mad at you for something that happened a long time ago and that was not that important to begin with!
  • Playing the Family Card: It doesn't matter how bad I treated you before. I'm your family, so you have to help me out!
  • Playing the Victim Card: Go easy on me! I had a rough childhood! That'll get those idiots off of my back.
  • Police Brutality: I get a rise at beating the shit out of suspects. I never liked them anyways.
    • Police Brutality Gambit: Those worthless coppers arrested me, so I'm going to turn the public against those pigs by framing them for using excessive force on me!
  • Power Perversion Potential: I just found out I have X-ray vision. I can't wait to use this to get away with spying on women while they're undressing, bathing or using the toilet!
  • Prayer of Malice: I pray to God that you die horribly even for the least vile of sins, you vile heathen!
  • Pregnant Hostage: I'm such an immoral dirtbag that I'm willing to threaten the life of a pregnant woman to get what I want!
  • Psychological Projection: I'm not an asshole; everyone else is!
  • Punished for Sympathy: Mercy is for the weak! I oughta beat the shit out of you for sympathizing with that person I don't like!
  • Pushy Gun-Toting Villain: SHUT UP! Get over there with the rest of the weaklings, or your friends and family will be singing "Amazing Grace" about you!
  • Quit Your Whining: Stop your whining, or else I'll give you something else to whine about!
  • Realpolitik: Politeness my ass. My country gets the job done by being mean, ruthless, and unforgiving!
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: I'll break you by giving you a full-length speech on why you're a failure and a complete piece of shit!
  • Refuse to Rescue the Disliked: No, I'm not gonna lift a finger to save that person's sorry ass because I never found a reason to like him or her. Enjoy getting killed, fuckface!
  • Rejected Apology: Fuck your apology! I don't care how sorry you are, I will never forgive you! Go to hell, you shithead!
  • Relationship Sabotage: I make life hell for lovey-dovey couples and will do anything to keep them apart!
  • Relative Button: Hey, how have things been for you since the day I killed your mother? It won't be long before you see her again, thanks to me!
  • Relative Ridicule: Your mother, father, brother, sister, and everyone else in your family are fucking worthless!
  • Reminiscing About Your Victims: Remember when I killed your father in front of you when you were little? His screams during his final moments were glorious!
  • Remote Control Ruckus: Give me the remote! We're watching my favorite TV show, not yours!
  • The Revolution Will Not Be Civilized: Screw our oppressive government! But wait, we will institute our own that is just like what we were against!
  • Ring-Ring-CRUNCH!: THAT STUPID ALARM CLOCK!!! I WILL BREAK YOU INTO PIECES, YOU MORON!
  • Rudely Hanging Up: Good riddance, moron! (hangs up phone)
  • Second-Face Smoke: I'm a smoker and I exhale it into your face to show how little I respect you.
  • Selective Enforcement: This person did something bad. We don't care. When YOU do something bad, we're more than willing to punish you!
  • Sentenced Without Trial: You're so obviously guilty, we're not even giving you a trial because you're going straight to jail! Next case!
  • Sleazy Photoshoot: How about we spice up this photoshoot by taking your top off so we can have some pics of your knockers?
  • Slut-Shaming: Are you a woman who had sex with a lot of men? You're a filthy, sinning, disgusting whore who deserves to be treated lower than shit!
    • Robosexuals Are Creeps: Are you a human who is having a romantic/sexual relationship with a robot? You deserve to be treated horribly!
    • Virgin-Shaming: Are you a man who never banged a woman in your life? Way to go on like a pathetic loser!
  • Snarking Thanks: Thanks for being a schmuck whose only purpose is to piss me off with your idiocy, dumbass!
  • Society Is to Blame: It's not my fault I'm a prick! If this town wasn't such a sucky rathole that enables and empowers shitbags, I wouldn't be forced to do horrible things to other people!
  • Speak Ill of the Dead: Even when you're dead, I still don't respect you! I'm glad that your sorry ass is rotting in the grave!
  • Spiteful Gluttony: What, you're too good (or poor, maybe?) to eat with me? Have it your way! Sit there and watch me shovel it in!
  • Spiteful Spit: I make it clear how much I don't respect you by spitting into your face. Ptooey!
  • Spiteful Spoiler: You looking forward to seeing the twist for yourself? Too bad, 'cause I'm gonna ruin it for you!
  • Spiteful Suicide: What better way to spite you than to kill myself? Farewell, loser!
  • Spiteful Will: I anticipated that you'd outlive me and attend my funeral to see if I'd leave you anything in my will, but guess what? You're a total schmuck, you ain't getting jack squat from me and you can't do anything about it since I'm dead now!
  • Spitty Speaker: Yeah, I spit when I talk! No, I don't care that it's getting all over your face!
  • Stealing the Handicapped Spot: I'm gonna park in the handicapped space even though I'm able-bodied! Screw the disabled people who need it more!
  • Stink Snub: Phew! You stink! Buy some deodorant or take a shower, you skunk!
  • Stock Shoujo Bullying Tactics: I'll ruin your life without even laying a hand on you!
  • Suddenly Shouting: You wanna see how fucking rude I am!? BY YELLING IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE, DICKHEAD!
  • Suicide Dare: What the fuck are you waiting for? Kill yourself! Do it! I'll be happy if you do!
  • Taking Advantage of Generosity: Pussies like you deserve to be taken advantage of! Now buy me stuff!
  • Tastes Like Disdain: How dare you serve me such disgusting food?!? I'll throw it on the ground just to spite you!
  • Taunting the Unconscious: You sure can't get me now... what a useless, worthless dead carcass!
  • Teasing the Substitute Teacher: I like to bully substitute teachers because they rarely seem tough!
  • Think of the Children!: I manipulate the public into enforcing stricter censorship for the media with the excuse that anything too explicit, violent or crude might corrupt children because I'm too lazy to carefully monitor what I allow my kids to watch and too selfish to care that I'm ruining entertainment for everyone who doesn't share my views!
  • Threw My Bike on the Roof: I'll destroy your precious property!
  • Took a Level in Jerkass: I used to be nice, but now I'm a jerk, and I like it that way!
  • Tough Love: I'm being or at least acting like an asshole to toughen you up! Don't take it personally!
  • Trash Talk: Talking bad about fat, stupid, ugly, weak, low-life pieces of shit like my enemies is my thing! I talk so much trash, it stinks like your ass!
  • Treated Worse than the Pet: I care about you so little that I'll make a show of treating my dog better than you!
  • Unprovoked Pervert Payback: Were you just lusting at me, you pervert?! *Smacks you*
  • Unsportsmanlike Gloating: Yay! I won! You lost! Sucker!
  • Villainous Ethics Decay: Helllloooooo! Villain! I'll show all of those idiots in the crook business what a better criminal is like! Screw honor, respect and mother-freaking standards!
  • Virtue Is Weakness: I would not be caught dead pulling kindness, compassion, helping others, and showing mercy! I am not that soft!
  • Vitriolic Best Buds: Just because I'm your "buddy" doesn't stop me from calling you an idiot, a loser, a piece of shit, or other creative insults I can think of! Not that you don't butt heads back... But hey, that's what so-called friends are for!
    • With Friends Like These...: It doesn't matter if I'm your so-called friend! I hate your fucking guts at least sometimes and I'm still gonna do horrible stuff to you because that's what I like!
  • Wants to Be Hated: So what if people hate my guts? That's just more incentive for me to be an asshole.
  • Weakness Is Just a State of Mind: No, the (obviously unachievable) goal isn't unachievable! You just gotta work harder! So do it!
  • Weeding Out Imperfections: You people are no better than dirty weeds stealing nutrients from beautiful flowers! I'm going to yank out all of you by the roots!!
  • Why Did You Make Me Hit You?: It's your fault I'm attacking you! Apologize now!
  • Would Harm a Senior: As if I give a fuck if you're an old geezer! I'd hit anyone no matter how old and frail they are!
  • Would Hit a Girl: I also don't give a fuck if you're some bitch! I beat up anyone regardless of their gender!
  • Would Hurt a Child: And who gives a fuck if you're a little undeveloped shrimp?! I'd hurt anyone regardless of their age!
  • Wounded Gazelle Gambit: Everyone, help me! This jerk is hurting me! Hahahaha! Now they're on my side instead of yours!
  • With Us or Against Us: If you don't side with us or partake in this fight, you are automatically our enemy and we won't show you any mercy!
    • Join or Die: Even worse, we will end you if you don't take our side!
  • You Are a Credit to Your Race: You're the one member of the racial group I discriminate against I hate the least, and I don't care that the compliment I just gave is undermined by my overt racism.
  • You Are Fat: Stop eating so much and drop off that weight already, chubs!
  • Your Mom: I get to you by insulting your mama! Got a long list of phrases too!

    Miscellaneous Tropes 


So, you actually read those tropes, huh? Normally, I tell people, "Thanks, fuckhead! Now, go on. Fuck off with you." ...WHY are you still - get the fuck outta here!

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