Hates Everyone Equally - Television Tropes & Idioms

"I don't have prejudice, I hate everyone equally."

— H. L. Mencken

If you treat one person like dirt, you're an asshole. If you treat a group of people like dirt, you are a racist and a bigot. If you treat everyone like dirt you are... kind of okay. At very least, it says "Evil? Maybe. But petty? Never!".

The social version of A Million is a Statistic. May be used as an Anti-Hero trait in cases like Noble Bigot with a Badge.

This can be Truth in Television. The term for this kind of people is 'misanthrope', they usually manage to function within society, and can form normal relationships with other humans. Indeed, it's considered an asset for humourists (H.L. Mencken being the prime example).

Related to: Equal Opportunity Offender

Examples:

Anime and Manga

Kyoya Hibari from Katekyo Hitman Reborn!. He hates everyone, and treats them all with contempt. Everyone in series accepts this as just being him. And guess what? He's been consistently voted as the most beloved character in the series.
Hiyori of Bleach. She hates humans, she hates shinigami, she hates her fellow vizards, she hates hollows, but most of all she hates Aizen.

Comedy

A certain comedian said of his father that all the races his dad hated most was human.

Comic Books

Marvel villain The Red Skull started off as a Nazi, but has since expanded his insane sense of hatred to pretty much the whole world, including himself. Note that unlike most others who fall under this trope, there is nothing remotely likable or redeemable about the Skull.
Kim Pine is accused of this in Scott Pilgrim, where she responds to her coworker asking her if that includes her by saying 'you're part of everyone'
Sam Lane seemed less than thrilled to find out that his daughter Lois was going to marry Clark Kent, and seemed to give various reasons to why he didn't like him, ranging from Clark being too mild-mannered to blaming Clark for breaking off the engagement the previous time (Clark promptly pointed out that it was actually Lois who broke it off). Ron Troupe, who was engaged to Lois' sister, Lucy, was worried how he would take Lucy marrying a black man. Lucy replied that Sam was by no means racist. He hated all of his daughters' beaus.

Film

Higgins from My Fair Lady.
Higgins: You see, the great secret, Eliza, is not a question of good manners or bad manners, or any particular sort of manners, but having the same manner for all human souls. The question is not whether I treat you rudely, but whether you've ever heard me treat anyone better.
Sergeant Hartman from Full Metal Jacket claims to be this. If you aren't a Marine, you are nothing. If you are a Marine, you are a god.
Gunnery Sgt. Hartman: There is no racial bigotry here! I do not look down on niggers, kikes, wops or greasers! Here you are ALL equally worthless!
- Although he does make some pretty racist comments to Private Brown...
  - Then again, you could say the same with Pyle, except replacing race with fat.
  - He makes horrible comments to everybody. Hell the racist ones almost count as "nice" from Hartman!
  - The racist statements he makes were probably just baiting Brown and trying to get a rise out of so Hartman could push his Drill Sergeant Nasty act further. Consider that he never makes further racist statements, and makes Brown the squad leader after that.
- His berating of Joker for not "loving the virgin Mary", on the other hand, smacks of a Catholic bias that goes beyond hating everyone equally.
  - Oddly enough, he does respect him for having the balls to say it to his face, a few seconds after.
  Hartman: You goddamn communist heathen, you had best sound off that you love the Virgin Mary, or I'm going to stomp your guts out. Now, you do love the Virgin Mary, don't you?
  Joker: Sir, negative, sir!
  Hartman: Private Joker are you trying to offend me?!
  Joker: Sir, negative, sir! Sir, the private believes that any answer he gives will be wrong, and the senior drill instructor will beat him harder if he reverses himself now, sir!
  Hartman: Private Snowball, you're fired. Private Joker is now promoted to squad leader. Private Joker is silly and he's ignorant, but he's got guts, and guts is enough.
Dirty Harry:
Di Georgio: Ah that's one thing about our Harry. Doesn't play any favorites! Harry hates everybody. Limeys, Micks, Hebes, Fat Dagos, Niggers, Honkies, Chinks, you name it.
Gonzales: How does he feel about Mexicans?
Di Georgio: Ask him.
Harry Callahan: Especially Spics.
Bonecrusher hates everything.
In The Wild One, Badass Biker Johnny Strabler is asked what he's rebelling against. His reply: "Whaddaya got?"

Literature

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell has Strange's father, who never left any bequests when he died because he simply hated everyone.
Vimes of Discworld:
"'I can't say I like dwarfs much, Littlebottom. But I don't like trolls or humans either, so I suppose that's okay."
- While he is a definite case of this, Vimes himself is never quite clear about how he feels about this and is usually trying to justify it to himself; one book features him wrestling with the problem, such as thinking to himself, "It wasn't as if he was speciesist, was he?" Like Vetinari, he too has a special hatred for certain people — usually "kings and the undead." Sometimes assassins, too.
- Similarly, Lord Vetinari is said in Sourcerer to be a cruel and unfair ruler, but he is equally cruel and unfair to everyone.
  - Vetinari does have a special hatred for mimes. (He reserves a scorpion pit just for them, with a large sign on the wall reading "LEARN THE WORDS.") This is, however, seen as one of his good points by most of Ankh-Morpork's citizens.
Witchfinder Shadwell from Good Omens. He's described as hating all Southerners, and by inference, is standing on the North Pole.
The drill sergeant in Old Man's War has specific reasons why he hates all religions, all races, all sexual orientations, and clog dancers. He's actually a little worried when the main character doesn't conform to any of his hated groups, but cheerfully notes that by the end of standard training he'll certainly do something that gives the sergeant a reason to hate him personally.
Police officer Henry "Roscoe" Rules from Joseph Wambaugh's The Choirboys. It's considered to be his one redeeming trait. He expresses a wish for a word as ugly as "nigger" that he can apply to all humanity, and his co-workers eventually come up with "scrotes," which Roscoe gleefully adopts.
In Stuart M. Kamisnky's Inspector Rostnikov series, the detective Emil Karpo is cold, detached, and a lot like a monk (and somewhat like Mr. Spock). When Rostnikov's wife meets Karpo, she thinks he's cold and distant towards her because she's Jewish. (As in the Monk example below, Karpo isn't misanthropic.)

Live-Action TV

Gregory House from House.
- Except for the ones with something in the leg.
- And occasionally, children.
- And coma patients. Mostly because they can't talk.
Prison officer Mackay in Porridge:
I am firm but fair. Remember I treat you all with equal contempt.
In the Mexico episode of Monk, Sharona explains to the Mexican authorities that Monk isn't racist against Mexicans — he thinks all people are dirty.
- Same problem happened with Monk wiping his hand after shaking hands with a black man.
The West Wing:
Sam: You know, Toby... You could afford to *buy* one of those now if you want!
Toby: There's literally no one in the world that I don't hate right now.
- (Becomes greatly less funny once you realize that Toby is actually not exaggerating.)
Dr Cox from Scrubs. And Kelso. And the Janitor.

Music

Marilyn Manson's "The Beautiful People":
There's no time to discriminate
Hate every motherfucker that's in your way
Go Set Go's "I Hate Everyone" is Exactly What It Says on the Tin. The chorus says it all.
All the people that I know
I hate you all
And all the people that I don’t
I hate you all
Say Anything's Hate Everyone blends this with Humans Are Bastards throughout the whole song.
Did you know that there are people in the world
annoyed with all the other people in the world,
and of all these angry people in the world
I am the angriest boy.*
and that's just the intro
Chimaira - "Pure Hatred"
The vicious cycle has not changed!
My times spent rearranged!
Mother fuck it all!
I can't stand this!
Remember when I said
Everyone makes me sick?!
Well nothing has changed!
(chorus):
I hate (I hate) everyone!
I hate (I hate) everyone!
The vicious cycle still remains!
Constant cluster fuck, bloodstains!
Ignorance, you kill for God!
Expression not allowed!
You fucked it up!
With your mother fuckin' games!
Remember when I said
I was so ashamed?!
Well nothing has changed!
I hate (I hate) everyone!
I hate (I hate) everyone!
(I hate)
(I hate)
Dethklok prove this with Fan Song, which is a song dedicated to all their fans... And how much they hate them and wish they would die. You can tell it solely by the fact that the word "hate" is used a total of 48 times, along with the fact that "die" is used a total of 31 times. Yet, fans still continue to buy their records...

Radio

Neal Boortz styles himself as such.

Real Life

Saying: "All the world's cracked but me and thee; and I'm not too sure about thee."
Some describe Harlan Ellison this way.
Former New York mayor Ed Koch invoked this to defend Rudy Giuliani against charges of racism: "Blacks and Hispanics ... would say to me, 'He's a racist!' I said, 'Absolutely not, he's nasty to everybody'."

Theatre

The title character in Molière's play The Misanthrope.

Video Games

Referenced on a radio talk show in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City. " I am not a racist. I hate everybody irrelevant of other issues, but I especially hate yankees!"
- "Yankees", in this context, being anybody from north of the state of Florida.
Pokemon Diamond And Pearl: Cyrus, hater of emotions and every living thing at all. And he'll end it all.
Francis hates you, and Doctors and Lawyers and Vampires. But not his vest.

Web Animation

Foamy the squirrel from Neurotically Yours.

Web Comics

It's yet to be seen whether Bob the Crab from The Dugs- Baseball Comics likes anyone.
Dr. Lorna from Sluggy Freelance.
Mike of the Walkyverse, various webcomics all taking place in the same fictional canon.
Yuudai from Sakana claims that he's this, but it seems to be subverted since he adores his cat and seems to get along at least a little bit better with Taro than with everyone else, so he makes exceptions for some.
Davan (and most of the main cast, to a degree) from Something Positive. When he's accused of being anti-Wiccan, his Wiccan friend Kim defends him thus:
I know Davan would never single out a religion. If anything, his disdain is shared by everyone.
Baxter the squirrel from Catharsis:
Remly: You know what your problem is? You just don't care.
Baxter: No. My problem is that people expect me to care.
Norman the squirrel (does anyone notice a pattern here?) from Dragon Tails.
Karkat from Homestuck is an angry asshole to everyone. Absolutely everyone. Including him self. (With the possible exception of Kanaya.)
In Sinfest, Slick is just sick of people.

Web Original

Evil Overlord List Cellblock A #171: "I will be an equal-opportunity despot and make sure that terror and oppression is distributed fairly..."
Encyclopedia Dramatica.
Zach Jamis in Survival of the Fittest hates everyone and everything in the world as much as the next thing he hates... except for his best friend Sammy Franklin.
Zero Punctuation's Yahtzee styles himself this way as a self described cynic and misanthrope. A female viewer who called him out for apparent misogyny received the reply that she was technically right in that he did hate women, but only because Yahtzee apparently hates people across the board.
SF Debris.
Andrew Ti of the "Yo, Is This Racist?" blog delivered a magnificent Take That to people who use this joke.

Western Animation

Karaba the villainess and title sorceress of Kirikou and the Sorceress.
Mandy from The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy.
Grouchy Smurf from The Smurfs. Although, he does like Baby Smurf.
Parodied on The Simpsons when Homer offers this trope to Bart as a way to get out of jury duty. The trick is to say that you're "prejudiced against all races."
Lemongrab of the show Adventure Time doesn't like anybody. His sour personality is the result of a failed science experiment that occurred during his creation in a laboratory. Unless you completely avoid him, don't talk to him, don't look at him, and don't come anywhere NEAR him, then you're okay. But if you do so much as ask "Who are you talking to?" when he goes into one of his near-psychotic screaming rants, then he'll send your ass to the dungeon for the rest of your life. Even if you're his MOTHER. He just doesn't care.