Get Help With English Here

I have more for Guise's sheet on the Characters.Sentinels Of The Multiverse page. First section is written in first person becuase Guise is a forth wall breaker.

Guise

• Discard and Draw:
  • 'Where Did I Leave That...' works in the literal sense of the trope's name. It lets me dig through my bottomless magic swag bag, which in more boring game terms means my player draws two cards. If he/she liked what I found, great! If not, they can discard those cards and get a card from the trash instead. That way everyone's happy.
  • My deck also has this vibe. Since my Ongoing cards destroy themselves during the start of my turn, I'm constantly playing new ones whenever I get the chance. One turn I may get a huge power boost by being a barbarian, next turn I may be shooting punks with a 'Blatant Reference' when my teammate's turns end. It really just depends on what I need to do at the moment.
• It's the Best Whatever, Ever!: The 'Best Card Ever!', which is the best card ever. I mean, it lets me draw more cards, hit stuff, heals me, and I get to play more cards. What more do you want?

-=-

For the page Discard and Draw, under Tabletop Game:

• Several characters in Sentinels Of The Multiverse have some form of Discard and Draw.
  • Ra's alternate form Horus of Two Horizions base power lets him draw three cards, then discard two. Tachyon's 'Burst of Speed' has the same effect, but it is a One-shot rather than a reusable power. Parse's 'Quick Insight' card lets Parse stop a villain card, which results in the Villain playing another card to replace it, while Parse gets to draw a card to replace 'Buffer Overflow' while 'Recompile' lets her discard up to three cards to draw twice the number she discarded.
  • There can only be one of Bunker's Modes, Mr. Fixer's Tools and Styles, and the Naturalist's Forms in play at a time. Any new Mode/Tool/Style/Forms cause the old one to leave play.
  • Guise's deck features several Ongoing cards that only last a turn, so he's constantly trading which tricks he can do during his (and sometime his teammates) turns.

edited 19th Dec '15 11:46:57 AM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

Okay, thanks for the help. I'd made the corrections and added the example to the page.

^^

The moderator Fighteer will be along in a minute to tell you that "functions like this" is Word Cruft. :)

You can just remove the phrase altogether and save some time.

edited 19th Dec '15 1:08:52 AM by Arivne

You clearly don't need me to say it, then. But why is that first section written in first person? It's not on a Self-Demonstrating page.

"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"

^ Becuase Guise is a fourth wall breaker a la Deadpool. Fixed it up a bit.

edited 19th Dec '15 11:44:35 AM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

That's not a justification. We only write that way on SD articles, not on main ones.

"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"

Okay. I'll go fix Guise' s section of the page and make it normal later.

Edit: Here you go Fighteer, one section of the Characters.Sentinels Of The Multiverse page normalized.

Guise

->Debut: Guise Mini Expansion

Joseph King was a tabloid photographer who was killed by a falling piano. Fortunately for him, the place where he was squished was the site of a recent battle between the Freedom Five and the Wager Master. The leftover improbability particles from that battle mixed with Joseph's remains, reviving him and granting him improbability powers of his own. He is now known as the hero Guise, who tries to take most of the credit whenever possible.

Guise's playstyle is to play several Ongoing cards that allow him to either play cards or do damage during his teammates' turns, or use the equipment, powers, and/or effects of his teammates and steal the spotlight.

Guise's promo form is Santa Guise, self proclaimed champion of Christmas who fights the good fight in the war Thanksgiving wages against Christmas. Unlike most heroes, this form gives Guise two base powers instead of one.

• '80s Hair: Sports a nice set of purple locks on the art of 'Lemme See That...'.
• Air Guitar: Guise doesn't actually do that, but his player can thanks to 'Let Me See That...'.
• Arch-Enemy: Wager Master and Argentium.
• Armor Piercing: 'X-Treeeeeeeeme' makes all damage Guise deals Irreducible as long as it is out.
• Art Shift: Due to Guise having improbability powers, the art of his cards tend to shift to reflect the theme of the card ( such as 'Super Ultra Kawaii!!' looking as if it came from a manga)
• Attack Reflector: Inverted with 'X-Treeeeeeeeme', which prevents damage Guise would deal from being redirected in addition to making the damage Irreducible. 'Total Beefcake' plays it straight, redirecting damage Guise would take to the villains.
• Back from the Dead: Guise was killed by a falling piano, only to be revived shortly afterwards due to the leftover improbability from a recent battle between the Freedom Five and the Wager Master.
• Badass Santa: Guise's alternate form is him cosplaying as Santa. He is just as badass as regular Guise.
• Barbarian Hero: 'Guise the Barbarian' turns Guise into one that is mighty and fearsome like the fabled alpaca, which increases damage he deals by two.
• Breaking the Fourth Wall: Guise's cards often have Guise himself speaking in the rules text of the cards, and referring to the players themselves.
• Chest Insignia: Guise's chest insignia changes as much as Guise does, reflecting what he is currently doing at the time.
• Cloudcuckoolander: Guise's off the wall demeanor and antics often causes other more professional heroes to look down on him.
• Discard and Draw:
  • 'Where Did I Leave That...” lets Guise's player draw two cards. If they didn't like what they drew, they can discard them to take any card in Guise's trash instead.
  • Guise's Ongoing cards destroy themselves at the start of his turn, so Guise is constantly playing other Ongoings to replace the ones he played last turn.
• Expy/Composite Character: Guise has the look, personality, and knowledge of the forth wall akin to Deadpool and the shapeshifting powers of Morph, whom also breaks the fourth wall. Also Guise never takes off his costume, which is a trait of Ambush Bug.
• Fighting Clown: Guise may be a purple clad egomaniac, but he weaponized narrative devices like retcons and Darker and Edgier reboots. The results are quite effective.
• Leaning on the Fourth Wall: 'Look What I Found!' has Guise whack Wager Master with part of the card itself.
• Meaningful Name: 'Guise' is a fitting name for a character who often appears in different forms and roles.
• Mechanically Unusual Fighter:
  • Guise's main trick is to borrow card effects of another hero. 'Let Me See That...' steals an Equipment card and lets Guise use the stolen card instead of its owner, 'I Can Do That, Too!' lets Guise use another hero's base power as if it were his, and 'Oh Yea, I'm That Guy' treats its rules text as the rules text of all in play Ongoings of another hero.
  • Santa Guise is the only hero with two base powers. The first power puts the top card of each hero deck into the play area face down (another trick other heroes cannot do), and the second lets a hero flip all of their face down cards face up, which are then treated as just being played.
• Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot:
  • Guise's Ongoings cards feature Guise becoming several character archetypes, such as a barbarian or detective. He can mix and match these cards, allowing him to become strange combinations of archetypes such as a barbarian detective magical love prince that is a total beefcake.
  • 'Uh, Yeah, I'm That Guy' allows Guise to assume the identity of a fellow hero, allowing him to use the effects of their Ongoings.
  • Invoked in the art for 'Selling Out', which features Guise with a Pirate hat, a ninja mask, a katana, a zombie like hand, Mr. Chomps, and the Play, Power, Draw T-shirt sold by the game's creators.
• Power Copying: A trio of Guise's cards let Guise use another hero's base power, Equipment, and Ongoing effects as his own for a turn.
• Purple Is Powerful: Wears a purple costume with dark purple gloves and outer underwear.
• Shout-Out: Many of the cards in Guise's deck are some sort of reference.
  • 'Blatant Reference' is a blatant reference towards Samuel L. Jackson and Pulp Fiction.
  • 'Gimmicky Character' has Guise ride a shark, which is similar to the cover of Deadpool Killustrated #1
  • 'Guise the Barbarian' is another blatant reference, this time to Conan The Barbarian.
  • 'I Can Do That, Too!' has Guise assume the crane stance in front of Mr. Fixer, and ask about waxing.
  • 'Lemme See That...' features Guise turning into a heavy metal rock star, while Argent Adept tells Guise that his lyra is not for playing freebird.
  • 'X-Treeeeeeeeme!!! is a homage towards Rob Liefeld and his signature style of muscle bound heroes.
  • The art of 'Retcon' is the same as Wraiths' 'Grappling Hook', only with the addition of Guise standing behind her. The main effect is the same as the grappling hook (destroy an ongoing or environment).
• Small Name, Big Ego: Many of the other heroes do not take Guise's grandstanding and over-inflated sense of importance favorably.
• Spotlight-Stealing Squad: Guise's game plan is to sit back and draw cards while his teammates take care of the villain. Once he's ready, he uses cards like 'Blatant Reference' and 'Super Ultra Kawaii!!' to deal damage and play cards (which can result in him playing One-shots like 'Best Card Ever!' to let him play even more cards) during another hero's turn. Pair these with a damage buff from 'Guise the Barbarian' or Legacy's damage buffing powers, and Guise can deal tons of damage on his own to either clear the field of minions or nuke the villain into oblivion.
• Reality Warper: Due to the improbability particles he absorbed, Guise can shapeshift and reference the forth wall.
• It's the Best Whatever, Ever!: 'Best Card Ever!', which lets Guise draw cards, deal damage, heal a little, and play another card.
• Wall of Text: Should Guise become Incapacitated, a literal Wall of Text with his Incapacitated abilities falls on top of him.
• Xtreme Kool Letterz: 'X-Treeeeeeeeme'.
• Underwear of Power: Sports a dark purple pair that goes over his purple spandex super suit.
• You Gotta Have Blue Hair: 'Let Me See That...' has Guise sport purple '80s Hair.

edited 22nd Dec '15 8:20:59 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

"...during his teammates turns...". That should be a plural possessive.

-> "during his teammates' turns"

"...the forth wall..." -> Fourth Wall

"purple clad egomanic" -> egomaniac

retcons -> Ret Cons ({{Ret Con}}s)

"'Guise' is a fitting name for a character whom often appears"

->who often

"instead of it's owner"

->its (singular possessive)

"as if it was his"

->were his

Pulp Fiction: should be italicized as per How to Write an Example - Emphasis For Work Names

-> Pulp Fiction

Likewise, Deadpool Killustrated #1 -> Deadpool Killustrated #1

"...forth wall." -> Fourth Wall

edited 21st Dec '15 2:45:41 PM by Arivne

Call once.

Made some minor edit there, should be good enough.

And the above corrections have been applied.

More tropes for the Characters.Sentinels Of The Multiverse

Kaargra Warfang

—>Debut: Wrath of the Cosmos

—>Sides: 'Bloodsworn Master'/'Eager Combatant'

The master of the Bloodsworn Colosseum, Kaargra Warfang travels the cosmos, appearing seemingly at random with her Colosseum. At each world, she forces the locals to fight for their lives as gladiators for her - and the crowd's - enjoyment. Those who impress her gain the chance to join her as one of the Bloodsworn, warriors hand picked by Kaargra and bonded to her with her blood.

Kaargra presents a unique challenge for the heroes to overcome. To win, simply defeating Kaargra is not enough: the heroes must battle Kaargra's and her Gladiators to earn Favor by doing enough damage or defeating targets. If the heroes can earn twenty or more Favor before the Bloodsworn can, the heroes win.

In addition to her normal villain deck, Kaargra brings a special Title deck. Title cards are awarded from play to any target (hero, villain, or environment) who completes the task required to claim them.

• Blood Oath: Those whom win the games and impress Kaargra are offered a chance to join the Bloodsworn. Anyone who accepts is bonded to Kaargra through their blood.
• Comeback Mechanic: The 'Fickle Fans' card. When played the losing team takes favor from the winning team. If the score is tied, every target damages themselves instead.
• Drider: Soulslayer Perith.
• Gladiator Games: Kaargra travels the universe to finds worlds and then force the locals to battle for their lives in the arena for her enjoyment.
• Meaningful Name: The Bloodsworn are warriors to swear loyalty to Kaargra by binding themselves to her with their blood.
• Mechanically Unusual Fighter: Unlike other villains, the heroes cannot win by defeating Kaargra ^note 'Bloodworn Master' has no HP total and thus makes her immune to damage due to not being a target, and while her 'Eager Combatant side does have HP reducing to zero causes her to flip back to 'Bloodsworn Master' instead of ending the battle or removing her from the game.. In order to win, they must win twenty Favor by performing feats to impress the crowd which usually involves damaging or defeating enemies. If Kaargra is on her 'Eager Combatant' side, the heroes can't win unless they KO her and get her to flip back to her 'Bloodsworn Master' side, even if they have enough favor to win on the spot. In addition to the alternate win condition, throughout the battle special Title cards are played from it's own deck. Each title has a different condition to gain it, and grants a perk to any target with that title.
• Mooks: The Bloodsworn, whom are considerably stronger than the average mook.
• Multiarmed And Dangerous: Dymkharn the Fearless and Provocator Tarnis.
• Multiple Head Case: The Tyragon-Rex, which is a three headed dinosaur.

edited 23rd Dec '15 6:45:34 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

"the heroes must battle Kaargra's and her Gladiators"

-> Kaargra

"Those whom win"

-> who win

• "to earn Favor"
• "twenty or more Favor"
• "When played the losing team takes favor"
• "they must win twenty Favor"
• "even if they have enough favor"

Is "Favor/favor" a proper noun or not? If it is it should always be capitalized. Based on its usage it apparently is, so change:

• When played the losing team takes Favor
• even if they have enough Favor

"The Bloodsworn are warriors to swear loyalty"

-> who swear loyalty OR that swear loyalty

"special Title cards are played from it's own deck."

-> their own deck.

"The Bloodsworn, whom are considerably stronger"

-> who are

When trying to decide whether to use "who" or"whom", try this: replace the who/whom with "he" (or "they"), or "him" (or "them").

If "he" or "they" fits better use "who", if "him" or "them" fits better use "whom".

So for the one above:

The Bloodsworn, they are considerably stronger...

The Bloodsworn, them are considerably stronger...

"they are considerably stronger" sounds more correct, so use "who".

And now you know how to do it, and And Knowing Is Half the Battle. :)

edited 25th Dec '15 9:15:47 PM by Arivne

This section if for Charatcers.Final Fantasy XIV Antagonists (in the last folder.) I wanted to check and make sure to iron out any errors before adding it:

The Lambs of Dalamud

An Apocalypse Cult that formed in 1.0 as a result of Dalamud's descent. They believe that a blood sacrifice would bring it down to purify the land. After the Calamity, the Cult is in denial that the descent of the moon was stopped. They make their dealings with the Voidsent in the keep of the fallen White Mage city of Amdapor, the Tam-Tara Deecroft and Northern Thanalan.

• Black Magic: Many of their members consist of Thaumaturges, the class needed for Black Mage, both having ties to Void magic, and their actions are appropriate for biblical depiction of black magic.
• Cargo Cult: This cult doesn't worship Bahamut, but rather his prison.
• Human Sacrifice: Their modus operandi is to lure unsuspecting adventurers to their doom by acting as kidnapped family members. One FATE chain in Northern Thanalan is an example. They also commit ritual suicide to bring forth voidsent.
• Not Afraid to Die: Their belief is that they will desend into the seventh hell and become resurrected for their sacrifice after the Calamity.

edited 25th Dec '15 8:58:21 PM by MorningStar1337

The page name should be Characters, not Charatcers.

"An Apocalypse Cult that formed in 1.0 as a result of Dalamud's descent. They believe that a blood sacrifice would bring it down to purify the land. After the Calamity, the Cult is in denial that the descent of the moon was stopped."

What is Dalamud? Apparently it's the moon referred to in the third sentence, but it isn't clear. I'd re-write the first sentence as follows:

-> An Apocalypse Cult that formed in 1.0 as a result of the descent of the moon Dalamud.

"They make their dealings with the Voidsent..."

"They make their dealings" doesn't sound correct. Maybe:

-> They deal with the Voidsent...

"Many of their members consist of Thaumaturges, the class needed for Black Mage, both having ties to Void magic, and their actions are appropriate for biblical depiction of black magic."

• This looks like a run-on sentence and should probably be broken up into two sentences.
• "biblical" should be capitalized (Biblical).
• I'd change the wording a bit.

-> Many of their members consist of Thaumaturges, the class needed for Black Mage. They have ties to Void magic and their actions are appropriate to the Biblical depiction of black magic.

"...bring forth voidsent."

Wait a minute. Wasn't it capitalized as Voidsent above? Unless there's something odd going on, it should always be either capitalized or not.

If it's a proper name (for something unique) it's capitalized. If it's a generic name it shouldn't.

"Their belief is that they will desend into the seventh hell"

• Should be "descend".
• I've looked up "seventh hell". It appears to be a proper name and should be capitalized (Seventh Hell).

-> Their belief is that they will descend into the Seventh Hell...

edited 25th Dec '15 9:54:08 PM by Arivne

Okay I'll explain the terminology I used for context sake.

Yes Dalamud is a moon, an artificial moon to be exact. And "Voidsent" is essential the game's term for demons. a for "seventh hell" I honestly don;t know why, but the lore has 7 hells apparently and as such the term get used as an curse word by the NP Cs

I'll make the changes listed here but I don;t think "They deal with the voidsent" is accurate. That phrasing implies that they see the voidsent as enemies instead of "allies" and with the demonic definition I was going for a Deal with the Devil context with that particular part of the section

How's this?

Changes clifnotes:

• Changed the entry for Black Magic into 3 sentences, hoping to elaborate a bit on it to make it less...run-onny
• Specified that it Dalamud indeed a moon (or is perceived as such), though I think the Cargo Cult entry might need some adjustments to make the context apparent^note To make a long story short, an advanced civilization created the Moon in quest (insert Death-star jokes here) to imprison the Dragon-tuned-Primal Bahamut to use as an energy source. The only thing relevant about this is that the moon itself is artificial but the Bahamut thing is needed to be mentioned for context's sake
• General spelling corrections
• As "voidsent" is the word for "demon" I went with lowercase, likewise I uppercased "Seventh Hell".
• Changed part of the description to make the Deal with the Devil aspect more apparent.

edited 9th Jan '16 10:00:13 PM by MorningStar1337

Call twice.

Unless I got some fix note, I will post it the day after tomorrow.

There are several trope examples I would like to add across the main Pokemon series. I would like these proofread before my edit ban is lifted and I post them. I will post them all below.

Pokemon Red & Blue: Big Boo's Haunt- The Pokemon Tower in Lavender Town. Not only is it the only place you'll find the Ghostly Pokemon Gastly and Haunter, but a special item is needed first to unmask them. The trainers here are possessed channelers, and the tower is actually haunted by a dead Marowak you must take down. (If you are familiar with these games, channeler is a class of trainer and this is a correct word.)

First Town- Pallet Town. This begins the tradition of your character and rival's house along with the Professor's Lab, as well as the very first open path being up north.

Lost Woods- Viridian Forest. This is also the Noob Cave since you meet the first real trainers here and the forest itself is a maze.

Under Fire Red & Leaf Green: Along with Viridian Forest there is also the Berry Forest on Three Island. Besides a good place to find berries, you have to venture out here to find a lost girl with an unfortunate name.

Port Town- Vermilion City. A world famous ship named the S.S. Anne docks here when not cruising the world and the ship is quite a destination spot for trainers.

This is just for the first generation games. I would like to continue with the others after these are finished.

edited 31st Dec '15 7:44:30 AM by IAmNotAFunguy

I guess I really like my nick too much. And again I've got too much spare time. Someone please post this in my name after it's checked. And happy new year!

FIXED AND READY FOR SHIPMENT. Pre-prepared version ready for posting here

The Revenant:

• Annoying Arrows: So much averted... They are silent, deadly and extremely precise. First one somehow didn't kill the target? How about another three, fired in quick succession? Bows in this film make guns look really worthless.
• Artistic Licence – History / Historical Fiction: The film is based on the book "The Revenant" by Michael Punke, a fictionalised account of the story, so there are numerous liberties taken with the real history:
  • The real Hugh Glass didn't have any children (that we know of).
  • He had forgiven Bridger for leaving him behind.
  • He tracked, but never killed Fitzgerald. Depending on source, he got his personal rifle back.
  • Captain Andrew Henry not only was much older by the time the film is set. He also died a decade later, retired and rich.
  • Almost all exploits of Glass on his journey back, aside from feeding on a bison killed by wolves, are completely fictionous. Also, the real one walked for 200 miles. With a broken leg.
• Buried Alive: Hugh Glass ends up in a shallow grave, put in it while still breathing and kicking. Still need any more reasons to hate Fitzgerald? Amazingly, this saved his life, as the thin layer of dirt worked as insulation, preventing him from dying from hypothermia.
• Came Back Strong: While not exactly dead, Glass still survives his own funeral, drags out of his grave and then returns back to civilisation without any gear or supplies.

—>Glass: I ain't afraid to die anymore. I've done that already.

• Captain Smooth and Sergeant Rough: The dynamics between Captain Henry and Fitzgerald follow this trope, but while Captain Henry is... well, a captain, Fitzgerald is just a grunt. And they both work for a fur trading company, not the army.
• Character Development: Subtle one for Captain Henry. Early on, he was unable to bring himself to shoot wounded Glass and instead declares a hefty prize for anyone willing to stay with him. Later, he manages to calm his anger when preparing to execute Bridger for lying about Glass' fate. In the end however, he doesn't hesitate for even a second when facing Fitzgerald and tries to shoot him.
• *Click* Hello: Captain Henry enters the barracks to capture Fitzgerald after learning the truth. He puts a barrel to the head of one of Fitzgerald friends and cocks the hammer instead of greeting him.
• Closest Thing We Got: Captain Henry's father was a doctor. An early 19th century doctor.
• Conspicuous CG: The bison herd. Gets especially conspicuous when the wolfpack shows up.
• Cruel Mercy: Fitzgerald to Glass. He explains he can make it quick for him, without any further pain and all Hugh needs to do is blink. After which he stands over him for over a minute, explaining that he will finally have to blink.
• Determinator: Hugh Glass, full stop
  • When fighting with the bear he is clearly losing. That doesn't stop him from trying to fight back.
  • After the mauling, he's unable to even speak. Yet he clinges to his life with all his will, much to the ire of the expedition members.
  • When he finally recovers, he's hell-bent on going back to civilisation and get his revange, even if he can't even walk.
• Dirty Coward: Fitzgerald. For almost the entire film, he is the first one to run, turn back on everyone and just looks for his own survival and profit. Or doing something truly henious for a quick buck. When he realises Glass is still alive, he almost instantly runs away from the fort.
• Do Not Go Gentle: Villainous example - Fitzgerald gets shot, few of his fingers get chopped, he takes a knife in the stomach and is still fighting back, while obviously bleeding to death and without any chances to survive.
• End of an Age: The Arikara's chief perceives the arrival of white people and their hunting operations this way.
• "Eureka!" Moment: During his chase after Fitzgerald, Glass takes a break to refill his canteen. He notices a fallen tree in the stream, stands still for a moment and then starts chopping one of the branches. He uses it as a frame for Captain Henry's body, putting it on the first horse, himself hanging over the spare one pretending to be the dead body. Fitzgerald falls for the ruse and shoots Captain Henry for the second time, thinking it was Hugh.
• Evil Counterpart: The French trappers, who somehow manage to be worse than the amoral, greedy and racist Americans. After all, they are buying back furs stolen from the Americans and setting the Indians against them, all of which while secretly raping the kiddnaped daughter of the chief who is their temporary ally and casually hanging random Indians.
• Fingore: Hugh ends up chopping off at least two fingers out of Fitzgerald's hand at the very beginning of their fight.
• Foregone Conclusion: Glass will get better after the bear mauling and will drag himself back to civilisation.
• Foreshadowing: In one of his dreams, Hugh sees a dead body of a woman, with badly wounded head, bleeding profoundly and submerged under the strong current of a creek. That's how Fitzgerald is left after he's killed.
• The Heart: Bridger is the youngest and the most idealistic of all the expedition members. He is the only one who wants to stay with Glass because that's the right thing to do, not because of money or family ties. He clearly toils under the heavy guilt after realising Fitzgerald's lies. And then there is the scene in the raided Indian village, where he secretly leaves a food ration for the lone surviving woman, without even saying a word.
• I Shall Taunt You: How evil is Fitzgerald? With his last, dying breath he mocks Hugh, telling him he should enjoy his revenge, because that's all he can have now and there is absolutely nothing that will bring his boy back.
• Immune to Bullets: The bear doesn't even flinch while being hit by the large-bore rifle at point-blank range. Bears are notoriously hard to bring down, doubly so with pre-modern guns.
• Laser-Guided Karma:
  • The French trappers get what they deserve in the end. The Arikaras were looking for daughter of their chief all the time, fighting the Americans and working for the French. Turns out the woman was held captive by the French all the time. As a Sex Slave. From the account of the sole survivor of their party the Arikaras didn't take that offense lightly. Bonus points for Toussaint, who was busy raping Powaqa when Hugh stopped him. Pawaqa ended up cutting his testicles, just as she promised, for raping her.
  • Fitzgerald's demise from both wounds inflicted by Glass and Arikaras scalping him.
  • Beckett and Weston, the two volunteers who set the barge back on the river as a bait for the Arikaras. Instead of jumping off the board and joining the rest of the expedition, they've decided to stay and take their chances by the river. Two scenes later the barge is set ablaze by Arikaras and both of them are dead. Exactly as Glass predicted.
• Last-Name Basis: All white people call each other by their surname.
• The Load: After being mauled by the bear, Hugh turns into a serious problem for the rest of the expedition, as he not only requires a lot of careful care, but also needs to be carried around.
• Mama Bear: Quite literally - the bear which mauled Glass was a female with two cubs. And she goes to great lengths to make sure he's no longer a threat. In fact, the first thing that alarms Glass is the sight of the cubs - he already knows in how deep trouble he is now.
• Made of Iron:
  • Hugh Glass, obviously.
  • Fitzgerald takes ungodly amount of punishment before finally dying.
• My God, What Have I Done?: Bridger is a wreck of man after figuring out there was no reason to leave Glass behind.
• No Good Deed Goes Unpunished:
  • The lone Pawnee, who helps Glass and even builds a sweat lodge for him in the middle of a blizzard, while not owing Hugh anything. He gets hanged by the French trappers.
  • Captain Henry is shot by Fitzgerald and scalped after going with Glass to hunt down the killer of his son.
  • Averted with Glass himself, who saved Powaqa from the French trappers. This pays off in the very end, where he is spared by the Arikaras.
• No Escape but Down: Completely unintentional. While being pursued by the Arikaras, Glass' horse was shot and he himself didn't realise he's riding toward a cliff. Thus both he and his horse fall from the cliff. At least Glass had a tall pine to slow down his fall - the horse ended up a as meat source and a temporary shelter.
• No Name Given: The lone Pawnee, who plays quite a vital role, but we barely learn anything about him.
• Papa Wolf:
  • The chief of Arikaras goes to great lengths to find his kidnapped daughter.
  • Hugh is dying. He can't even speak. And then Fitzgerald kills his son, which ultimately gives Glass enough strength to crawl out of his own grave.
• Playing Possum: Hugh tries to do that early on in his fight with the bear. That includes ignoring a paw crushing his head. It doesn't work really well, as the bear was already busy mauling him.
• Rape Is a Special Kind of Evil: Especially when you are raping the missing daughter of a chief with whom you are trading and whom you are setting against your business competition.
• Red Right Hand: Fitzgerald was once captured by unspecified Indians. This left him with a very specific trophy - he was going through a scalping when he was saved. Now a sizable chunk of his skull lacks any skin on it.
• Reliably Unreliable Guns: Amusingly, this saves Bridger's life, when his rifle wasn't primed properly and Fitzgerald was unable to shoot him on the spot.
• Scarily Competent Tracker:
  • The Arikaras are able to effortlessly track down everyone in their territory, often after a few days and a blizzard. Most notably, they've managed to find Hugh after he escaped for a few miles via river, thus not leaving any tracks behind
  • Glass himself, who manages to track Fitzgerald after he used a small stream to cover his tracks
• Screw the Money, I Have Rules!: Bridger opts to stay with Glass, openly stating his honour debt and denouncing the money promised by Captain Henry. He stays true to his words and never takes the money - especially after realising he left Glass behind.
• Translation Convention: Completely averted. All characters speak in their native languages, without any other translation than subtitles.
  • The biggest example is the conversation between the leader of the French trappers, his translator and the chief of the Arikaras. Both leaders speak in their native languages.
  • When Hugh speaks with his son, they both use Pawnee, even if each of them is fluent in English. This works as a great way to show how they identify themselves.
  • The only English word Glass uses when talking with the lone Pawnee is "grizzly".
• Trapped Behind Enemy Lines: Almost the entire film is set in Arikaras' territory.
• Ungrateful Bastards: Most of the expedition members, who are willing to leave Glass or outright murder him just to run faster from the Arikaras. A man who was their scout and the only person who knew the region, thus allowing them to survive till that point.
• You Can't Fight Fate: Fitzgerald ends up fully scalped.
• Young Future Famous People: Remember Bridger? That's Jim Bridger.
• Viewers Are Geniuses:
  • The lone Pawneee is not building just a shack to protect Hugh from the blizzard. It's a makeshaft sweat lodge to help him heal.
  • The reason why Fitzgerald wants to re-enlist is never stated. Back in the day, it was a capital offense to kill a US soldier, regardless of circumstances. This way, Glass would be hanged if he followed through with his revenge.

The Revenant:

• Complete Monster: Fitzgerald, to an inhuman extent. A dirty coward who only cares for his own survival and his own petty profit, willing to abandon anyone if that would save his own skin. He stays with Glass only because he would be handsomly rewarded for that, but soon decided to just stage his death and quickly return for his paycheck. When things get complicated, he kills Hugh's son without even blinking and on pure instinct. Then, when a few days later Bridger realises what really happend, Fitzgerald overpowers him, prepares to shoot him and pulls the trigger. If the gun were properly primed, he would also have killed Bridger. Later he runs away to re-enlist and thus gain legal immunity for his actions and revenge from Glass (there was a death penalty for killing a soldier), in the process killing an Army captain and scalps him to put the blame on the Arikaras. When finally captured and dying in Glass' hands, he uses his last breath to taunt him about how pointless the whole revenge was. Did we mention he's also casually and extremely racist?
• Squick: After losing his horse, Hugh removes all the intestines from the still warm body, undresses and hides inside as if it was just some kind of tent or shack.

edited 2nd Jan '16 4:34:18 AM by rzorrz

"numerous liberties toward the real history:"

-> numerous liberties taken with the real history

"Andrew Captain Henry not only was much older by the time the film is set. He also". Should be combined into one sentence.

-> the film is set, he also

"his journey back, aside of" -> aside from

"dying out of hypothermia" -> dying from hypothermia

"drags out of his grave and then goes back to civilisation without any gear or supplies."

-> digs his way out of his grave...returns to civilisation

"shot wounded Glass" -> shoot the wounded Glass

perparing -> preparing

"tries to shot him" -> tries to shoot him

"Wouldn't that be an ambush, he might murder him in cold blood."

I can't understand this sentence or why it's in the example.

"enters barracks" -> enters the barracks

barell -> barrel

conspicious -> conspicuous

"wolfpack show up" -> wolfpack shows up

Even though it consists of a group of things, a wolfpack itself is singular.

"clearly loosing" -> losing

"clinges to his life" -> clings

"For almost entire film" -> almost the entire film

"for quick buck" -> for a quick buck

"bleeding to his death" -> bleeding to death

"without any chances to survive" -> chance

"perceives this way the arrival of white people and their hunting operations."

-> perceives the arrival of white people and their hunting operations this way.

"Fitzgerald takes the ruse" -> falls for the ruse

"secretly raping kiddnaped daughter" -> the kidnapped daughter

"under strong current of a creek" -> under the strong current

"all expedition members" -> all the expedition members

"a right thing to do" -> the right thing to do

"How evil Fitzgerald is?" -> How evil is Fitzgerald?

"he mocks Hugh he should enjoy his revange"

-> he mocks Hugh, telling him he should enjoy his revenge

"while being hit from the large-bore rifle" -> being hit by

"get what they've deserved" -> get what they deserve (as per How to Write an Example - Write in Present Tense)

"looking for daughter of their chief" -> looking for the daughter

This violates Example Indentation. You can't have a single entry at the second or lower level of indentation. You can fix the problem by merging it with the entry above it.

"set the barge back on river" -> back on the river

"joining the rest of expedition" -> rest of the expedition

"in how deep trouble he is now." -> how deep the trouble he is in now

This is a Zero-Context Example. You can't assume that the reader has read the rest of the page. Please briefly mention the specific things that show how tough he is.

"hunt down killer of his son." -> hunt down the killer

"When in pursuit by the Arikaras," -> While being pursued by

"who plays quite vital role" -> plays quite a vital role

"goes into great lengths" -> goes to great lengths

"raping missing daughter" -> raping the missing daughter

bussiness -> business

"going through scalping" -> going through a scalping

"Now sizable chunk" -> Now a sizable chunk

"unable to shot him on spot." -> unable to shoot him on the spot.

"often after few days" -> often after a few days

"escaped for few miles" -> escaped for a few miles

"he used small stream" -> he used a small stream

"between leader of the French trappers" -> between the leader

"even if each of them is fluent in English." -> even though both of them are

"Almost entire film" -> Almost the entire film

"only person knowing the region" -> only person who knew

"to kill US soldier" -> to kill a US soldier

"Glass would be hanged if following with his revange." -> if he followed through with his revenge

"to inhuman extent" -> to an inhuman extent

"when few days later" -> when a few days later

"If the gun was properly primed, he would also kill Bridger."

-> were properly primed, he would also have killed Bridger.

revange -> revenge

"killing army captain" -> killing an Army captain

"taunt him how pointless the whole revange" -> taunt him about how pointless the whole revenge

loosing -> losing

"undress and hides inside" -> undresses and hides inside

edited 3rd Jan '16 2:17:23 AM by Arivne

Oh Jesus, most of this reminds me why I only write tropes for the drawer now and don't even bother with trying to post them. I don't mind grammar fixes, that's what this thread is about. But I do mind the forceful "Zero Context Examples", where the basic premise of the plot has to be constantly written again and again and again and again. Or when sentences are mashed together, creating single-sentence entry for few lines of text. Or when someone decides there should be different word used, because that makes more sense outside of the context of the work. If I use "drag", then that's what happens. Not dig, no excavate, but drag.

edited 2nd Jan '16 4:24:19 AM by rzorrz

From Daredevil

• Broken Bird: She was the flighty fun loving former girlfriend of Matt. After, Matt uncovered a criminal conspiracy involving her father, who was under the control of the Purple Man. Despite the efforts of Murdock's alter ego, Daredevil, who tried to find evidence to exonerate him without exposing his secret identity, Heather's father committed suicide. And Heather start to abuse of alcohol.

Is ok?

edited 5th Jan '16 11:49:20 AM by rafi

I still wnat feedback on this post

rafi:

"She was the flighty fun loving former girlfriend of Matt."

Technically this is legal, but to make it flow better I would add the woman's name, change it to present tense (as per How to Write an Example - Write in Present Tense) and change the word order like so:

-> Heather is Matt's flighty fun-loving former girlfriend.

"After, Matt uncovered a criminal conspiracy involving her father, who was under the control of the Purple Man."

After what? After they broke up? If so:

-> After they broke up, Matt...

"...Heather's father committed suicide. And Heather start to abuse of alcohol."

The second sentence above is what we call a "sentence fragment" (only part of a sentence). The easiest way to correct it is to merge it with the prior sentence. Also, "start to abuse of alcohol" isn't correct. The final result:

-> ...Heather's father committed suicide and Heather started to abuse alcohol.

edited 9th Jan '16 12:29:23 AM by Arivne

I have tropes for Super Mario Bros. Z, specifically the reboot section.

• Aside Glance: Lakitu King briefly does one when Rawk Hawk says he could have beaten Bowser faster than Mario.
• Agony of the Feet: When Wario throws his dumbbell away, it lands on Waluigi's foot. Mario also has a brief moment of foot pain when he kicks Metal Bowser.
• Burning with Anger: Wario and Waluigi are less than pleased when Luigi mocks them, steaming with anger.
• Cape Swish: The first thing Mario does when he gets a Cape Feather in Episode 1 is this, before resuming his fight against Bowser.
• Everything Makes a Mushroom: Wario's Fart On Fire causes a mushroom shaped explosion upon impact.
• Jaw Drop: When Wario and Waluigi see that Mario survived a massive fiery fart via a timely Starman, their jaws drop in shock. Wario even does a little eye twitch.
• Rule of Three: During Episode 1, "Boo! You stink!" is shouted three times: Once when Wario is introduced, once when Wario thinks he beat Mario, and once when Bowser crashes the tournament.
• Shout-Out:
  • Kamek's incantation to summon a Metal Mushroom is 'A La Peanut Butter Sandwiches!'
• A Twinkle in the Sky: Happens to Wario and Waluigi when a Bulky Bob-Omb explodes while they were on the Bob-Omb.

edited 9th Jan '16 7:05:43 PM by Kingofsouls

I am a figment of your imagination

Okay This is the last call for my write-up on The Lambs of Dalamud. If I do not get a response, I'll be forced to assume that it doesn't need anymore improvements and add it to Characters.Final Fantasy XIV Antagonists as is

When an example says something like "Alice does this", it's considered Word Cruft. To avoid this, say specifically what they do that matches the trope, such as:

-> "Lakitu King briefly looks at the viewer..."

The wording of this sentence implies that it's Luigi that's "steaming with anger". Maybe change it to:

-> When Luigi mocks them, Wario and Waluigi are less than pleased (in fact, they're steaming with anger).

See 1st correction above re: Word Cruft.

-> The first thing Mario does...is swirl his cape..."

I checked on the Reboot folder on the Super Mario Bros. Z page you're adding this to and there are already other Shout-Out examples, so adding this won't violate Example Indentation. :)

• See 1st correction above re: Word Cruft. ("Happens to" = "This happens to").
• As per How to Write an Example - Write in Present Tense, you should change "were" to "are".
• You don't need to write out the Bob-Omb's name the second time you mention it. You can use a pronoun instead.

-> Wario and Waluigi get blasted into the sky when a Bulky Bob-Omb explodes while they are on it.

edited 11th Jan '16 12:58:09 AM by Arivne