Characters: Empowered


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    Empowered and Friends 

Empowered AKA Elissa Megan Powers

The main character. A sweet, beautiful (despite what she thinks) and kind young woman who had dreams of fighting crime from a young age, but got saddled with an unreliable supersuit that showed everything.

  • Action Girl: Her success average may not be as great as, say, Ninjette or Sistah Spooky, but Emp is still a moderately competent superhero.
  • Affirmative Action Girl: The Superhomeys made her a member because of some "gender quota", not because she was an awesome superhero.
  • Animal-Eared Headband: As Schrodinger's Cat Girl.
  • Aren't You Going to Ravish Me?: In volume 1 of Empowered, she is captured by a robot "Pimpotron" that scans her to see if she's worthy of a galactic harem. After deciding her butt was too big, it leaves her behind. She is clearly more devastated by the insult than relieved at her good fortune.
  • Ascended Fangirl: Loves superheroes so much that she took it as a college course. Then she became one and found out what most of the 'heroes' in her chosen superteam were like. She still fangirls over the leader of the Superhomeys, to the point of themed underwear.
  • Awesomeness by Analysis: Often. Though her crowning moment might have been figuring out how Deathmonger could find a newly risen SuperDead.
  • Berserk Button: Don't compare her to JLo, or say anything else that might be misunderstood as "you're fat".
  • Brains and Bondage: Played with, as Emp is much more into cosplay and roleplaying in bed than bondage per se, but among the roleplaying fantasies that she enjoys is one in which she is a rebellious slave girl whom Thugboy has to discipline. She also tells Ninjette that she likes it when Thugboy is very dominant with her in bed, and that she once provoked him into behaving that way by making a pun on the phrase "tie me up" (she was wearing an apron at the time, and nothing else, but had left it untied in the back). Also, in reference to when she first met Thugboy, Ocelotina later commented "That guy was practically making love to you with that rope!" As a general rule, however, Emp finds being tied up by criminals (super or otherwise) to be demeaning and traumatizing, and in no way a turn on; she is also very dismayed that she has gotten a reputation to the contrary.
  • Broken Bird: Played with. Emp's childhood was generally a happy one, and her parents were loving and supportive, but watching her father die of an aneurysm right in front of her deeply traumatized her, and unsurprisingly still affects her to the present. Her relationship with her mother still seems to be a good one, based on what we've seen of it, and she is, in many ways, one of the best-adjusted characters in the series. Her issues are just more apparent because of how much she wears her heart on her sleeve.
  • Buffy Speak
  • Chronic Hero Syndrome: Our best guess for what keeps her going in spite of outright sickeningly terrifying humiliation day after day.
  • Clothes Make The Supergirl: Of the "soft" variety.
  • Combat Pragmatist: She used Maid Man's status as The Dreaded to distract supervillains by telling them he was behind them and then blast them in the back when they turned in horror. She also demonstrated that, while picking up a car and throwing it at a villain may look cool, driving said car into the villain at 70+ mph is much more effective.
  • Combo Platter Powers
  • A Degree in Useless: Emp studied Suprahuman Studies which lots of people say is useless but it helps her quite a bit in her career as a superhero, once against Crimera, and then again against Animal Style.
  • Distressed Damsel: Captured and threatened by villains is kind of her thing, poor kid. however incredibly brave and has her legitimate Action Girl moments. Sometimes she can even rescue herself.
  • Dumb Blonde: Subverted - Emp talks like a Valley Girl, but is actually quite smart.
  • Empathic Weapon: Her supersuit, apparently a sapient being. Also, it's been suggested that her body issues are what keep the suit so fragile, which produces gratuitous nudity and augments her body issues, which obviously doesn't lead anywhere good. As long as it remains intact, it comes with
  • Even the Girls Want Her: In-comic, the girl who'll become Ocelotina. And quite possibly Ninjette as well, if the nigh-omniscient Caged Demonwolf is correct.
  • Expy: Why hello there, Social Butterfly! (Note that Emp draws our attention to this herself.)
  • Extraordinarily Empowered Girl
  • For Halloween, I Am Going as Myself: It's her part-time job - making public appearances with other lookalikes as herself. The "Southern" accent she affects might be an effort to stop the disguise from being too realistic.
  • Future Loser: Has this in a kind of Imagine Spot, where kid Emp meets her future superheroine self.
    Kid Emp: "Why do I have such a big butt as a grownup...? How did I wind up so old and f-fat...?"
    Current Emp: "Thanks a lot, younger version of me."
  • Geek: She is a Yaoi Fangirl and took "superhuman studies" at college. OK, if you consider her looks, make that Hollywood Geek.
  • Genre Savvy
  • Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold
  • The Heart: Her greatest power seems not to be her suit, but her compassion. It pays off big time with the Super Dead, treating them with respect and kindness.
  • Heroic Self-Deprecation: It becomes clear fairly quickly that Emp is a significantly more competent hero than she gives herself credit for. After this being pointed out by Ninjette, Thugboy, the Caged Demonwolf, Mind████, and Maidman, she's starting to believe it.
  • Imagination-Based Superpower: Her suit can do a lot of things but she hasn't figured out all its functions.
  • Lethal Chef: The only food she can cook is blueberry pancakes, and even those taste terrible.
  • Let's Get Dangerous: Once or twice per issue, Empowered will actually take down a villain, often a powerful or dangerous one, or one whom no other hero can handle under those circumstances.
    • Examples of this include:
    • When she defeated Anglerfish and his gang.
    • When she defeats Deathmonger, one of the most feared supervillains in the world.
    • When she blasted those ninja into little specks of carbonized particles.
    • The beatdown she unleashed on a Not So Different Rogue Cape at the end of book 4 certainly does.
    • When she defeats, and cages, the Caged Demonwolf.
    • Even earlier than both of those examples was her effortless rescue of ThugBoy in Vol. 1, which was pretty much foreshadowing the above incidents.
    • At one point she completely lost her temper, and nearly killed a villain by ripping off her own bodice and suffocating him with it. She stopped herself in time, and felt horribly guilty after.
  • Like a Badass out of Hell: Decided to follow Spooky in her attempt to break Mind████ out of hell, and when that resulted in a scam from Spooky's demonic provider trying to break out by having Spooky taking his place she beat the crap out of that devil, fought off the security and broke out of hell, all while taking a suicidal Spooky with her.
  • Meta Guy: In between the chapters, Emp comments on the story and her role in it. Most prominently when she drew attention to Adam Warren's Kill 'em All tendencies in his previous works and started freaking out that she might be next on the chopping block. 'S all right Emp, your name's on the cover (although even that's not enough to reassure her, as she worries it could refer to the concept of being empowered, rather than the person Empowered).
  • Ms. Fanservice: Also Ms. Fanservice in-universe due to the nature of her suit and God, does she hate it.
  • New Powers as the Plot Demands: Her supersuit didn't come with instructions, so she is continually discovering what it can do by accident. She even lampshades it. At the start, she comes with the powers listed above. By now, it's added:
  • No Respect Guy: One would think Empowered saving her teammates' hides more than once would earn her a little less outright abuse. Mind you, often they simply don't notice — for example, she rams a villain with a Humvee going 70 MPH, pointing out that this works much better than just throwing it at the villain, only to have the resulting wreck immobilize her and letting her "team" wander off assuming the other heroes and the villain knocked each other out.
    • After the events of Vol. 5, Sistah Spooky might just be warming up to her a bit. Confirmed by volume 8.
    • A better question was how she managed to avoid getting respect after one-shotting a world-destroying demon lord that had just wiped the floor with every other superhero combined. She only got respect from Capitan Rivet, who generally treats her with respect anyway.
    • Finally averted at the start of volume seven by the Super Dead who call out the Superhomies for their mistreatment of them and her and appoint Emp as their new representative on the Homies' council. A later chapter shows she does in fact now have that job, which required the Homeys promote her up from part-timer. Even still many of the Superhomies proper don't like her.
  • One-Note Cook: The only food she can cook is blueberry pancakes. (In a Naked Apron, which is even better!)
  • Plucky Girl: Despite abuse and suit failures, she doesn't give up.
  • Power Palms
  • Reluctant Fanservice Girl: The suit is skin tight and this makes her self-conscious. Well, more self-conscious.
  • Samaritan Syndrome: Emp's always wanted to be a superhero; she gained extra motivation after seeing her father die in front of her, though she's since come to terms with that particular trauma.
  • Super Mode: Whenever the suit is in real danger, it seemingly takes over and displays startling power. It also erases Emp's memory of any ability it used.
  • Steven Ulysses Perhero: Elissa Megan Powers
  • Tomboy and Girly Girl: The Girly Girl beside Ninjette.
  • Trigger: Fruity Flakes cereal, which she was eating when her father died in front of her. Even looking at it causes a Freak Out.
  • Yaoi Fangirl: Her response to hearing that one of her teammates was gay? Start shipping him with the other men.


Emp's boyfriend and lover. Ex-minion. Has quite a few skeletons in his closet from his younger days.

  • Badass Normal
  • Berserk Button: When he recognizes the cape who killed the Holy Avenger near the end of volume 4, he almost shoots him in front of a hundred other supers before he's stopped by Ninjette.
  • Cold Sniper: Zigzagged; he can be very cold and ruthless when fighting, but he's quite warm and affectionate with his friends and, especially, Emp. Also, the men he's killed often show up in his nightmares, it's implied.
  • Combat Pragmatist: Particularly in his cape-killer days he often uses a cape's or a super villain's weaknesses and flaws against them and will play extremely dirty if need be. A brief flashback in volume 6 shows him giving a step-by-step guide to attacking a superhero funeral that doesn't involve being a suicide bomber. Vol. 7 shows him expounding on the virtues of invoking Kill It with Fire on supers.
  • Cool Shades: He even wears them indoors.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: He was part of an underground anti-Cape conspiracy who eventually went on a Cape-killing spree in a city called San Antonio; this went about as well as you'd expect and he's the only one involved that we know survived — and that only because the Cape about to vaporise him with an energy blast was so busy gloating he got hit by a bus. He then formed a new gang of minions for hire that secretly manipulated and stole from their supervillain employers, until they tried to pull that trick on Willy Pete. ThugBoy was the only one who got away alive, forced to watch as Willy Pete alternately raped his friends in the eyes with his flaming phallus and ate them. Is it any wonder he has nightmares?
  • Dark Secret: He's the last known survivor of the Capekillers who were involved in the San Antonio incident. If this got out, every Cape, hero or villain, would probably want to dismember him.
  • Expository Hairstyle Change: After the other Witless Minions got killed by Willy Pete, ThugBoy went into permanent "Whatever" mode until he met Emp and let his hair grow out.
  • Expy
    • Take a look at Adam Warren's Livewires. Hollowpoint Ninja looks kind of familiar, doesn't he?
    • And if we go even farther back, he looks a lot like the WWWF Black Ops agent who showed up a few times in Warren's comic book version of the Dirty Pair.
  • Guns Akimbo
  • The Gunslinger: Is a mix of A & D, D when it comes to handguns and A when it comes to sniper rifles.
  • Hell-Bent for Leather: If he hasn't a Shirtless Scene, as is most often the case.
  • Honor Before Reason: No danger will stop him from praising a booty so fine.
  • Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: OK, Emp isn't really very tiny, but ThugBoy TOWERS over her. Just look in the first chapter of volume 2 where he's carrying her with one hand.
  • Love at First Sight: With Empowered.
  • Love Redeems
  • Mr. Fanservice
  • Muggle Power: Of the "kill 'em" variation, though he's toned this down, tries to avoid letting it be known he was this way once, and is in love with one of the few decent super-heroes in the business.
  • Never Live It Down: In-universe, working for Spartan 3000.
  • One Head Taller than Emp
  • Only Known by Their Nickname: A bonus strip on Adam Warren's DeviantArt page confirms that Emp does know his actual name, he just prefers to be called ThugBoy.
  • Punch Clock Villain: What he used to be.
  • Raging Stiffie: A problem for ThugBoy when sharing a bed with Ninjette. Or Emp.
  • Shirtless Scene: Frequently walks around in just his boxers.
  • Troubled, but Cute: Oh lord, so much.
  • Why Did It Have To Be Willy Pete?: ThugBoy freaks out at the prospect of getting involved with Willy Pete again. Of course, since Willy Pete is a Nigh Invulnerable — indeed, arguably truly invulnerable, even being immune to ThugBoy's patented fire-based cape-killer tricks — psychotic monster with nuke-grade fire attacks and a penchant for murderous rape and cannibalism, it's rather an understandable fear. Especially because Willy Pete has a particular grudge against ThugBoy for escaping him once before.

Ninjette AKA Kozue Kaburagi

Emp's best friend and part-time Lancer. Originally introduced to us as a Punch Clock Villain, she quickly turned into a sparky, confident foil and emotional support for the self-doubting main character. Then plot happened, and we discovered why she drinks so much...

  • Abusive Father: There's no way to properly convey just how horribly nightmarish Ninjette's father is, or the living hell she was raised in as a result.
  • A-Cup Angst: Flat as two peas on an ironing board, and Genre Savvy about her lack of the Most Common Superpower.
  • Action Girl
  • The Alcoholic: As she reveals in "Nine Beers with Ninjette", 'Jette's aware she has a problem, that she can't stop drinking - in fact, she's only been sober four nights since leaving home, which she spent with Emp.
  • Badass Normal: Almost to Charles Atlas Superpower levels. E.g. can identify people from 20 feet away by scent alone.
  • Badass Princess: Definitely doesn't want to be a princess, but it still stands.
  • Berserk Button/Compliment Backfire: Ninjette doesn't like to be called a "happy, pleasant drunk". Daddy issues, you know.
  • Celibate Hero: Ninjette seems to be be enhancing her Mad Ninja Skillz by avoiding sex, although she is allowed...
    • It's more of a Freudian thing, because she dearly wants to, but as a princess in a Hidden Elf Village she was not allowed, and the only other man she likes now is attached to Empowered. The ensuing frustration causes her to focus her attention on ninjaing. invoked
  • Charles Atlas Superpower
  • Combat Pragmatist: Uses decoys, bombs and revealed infidelity against the Ayakami clan in Vol 7.
  • A Date with Rosie Palms: Often. Sometimes even lets the Demonwolf watch!
  • Drowning My Sorrows: How she became a Hard-Drinking Party Girl.
  • Drunken Master
  • Fate Worse Than Death: Averted — before she was rescued by Emp, she narrowly avoided having her hands and feet cut off to facilitate her use as ninja breeding stock. Invoked later, when she tells Emp what could have happened.
  • Gratuitous Japanese: Justified. She was given a full Japanese name to make up for the dilution in the bloodline.
  • Hard-Drinking Party Girl: She sometimes demonstrates the disadvantages of heavy drinking.
    Ninjette: Yet another idea that seemed brilliant when I had a buzz on... turns out to kinda suck once I've sobered up a little.
  • Highly Visible Ninja
  • Informed Attribute: Parodied due to the manga-esque art. Despite her name, Ninjette is Caucasian.
  • Intimate Marks: Invoked. She intentionally wears booty shorts with her name across the booty.
  • Inverse Ninja Law: Averted in that while she's uber-skilled and can take on 3-4 opponents alone, she has come close to dying several times when she was confronted with any more than that. Which is why she blackmails Oyuki-chan into helping with the rest of the Ayakami and pulls out every dirty trick in the book to even the odds.
  • Made of Iron: Seems to recover remarkably fast from what would normally be pretty traumatic injury, even without the help of Suprahuman medical science...however...
    • Dented Iron: Volume 8 reveals that much of her supposed recovery is powerful illusion hiding all the bruises, scars, and blunt force trauma she's still carrying, in order to put up a strong face for Emp.
  • Master of Disguise: All ninja are taught "hensojutsu", but she's exceptional. To the point where she consummated a marriage whilst disguised as the groom.
  • McNinja
  • Missing Mom: Dead, according to "Nine Beers with Ninjette"; her father blames her for it.
  • Mukokuseki: Subverted. Ninjette is actually from New Jersey, and is of European descent.
  • Not So Different: Oyuki could not resist noting how akin to her father's combat style the vicious and underhanded tactics she demonstrated in vol. 7 were.
    Ninjette: If you think that I am voluntarily walking into a scenario likely to result in my death and/or dismemberment without first getting good and solidly are sadly f**king mistaken.
    Oyuki: By sheerest f**king coincidence, this humble genin has often heard a remarkably f**king similar sentiment voiced before Kaburagi-san's own f**king father, interestingly enough.
  • Pressure Point
  • Rebellious Princess: A particularly tragic variant, since "princess" to her clan means pregnancy machine. Hands and feet are considered optional.
  • Sexy Walk: There's even a secret ninja magic to do it. "You move like a ████ing jungle cat!"
  • Stripperiffic: Unlike Emp, she does this willingly with skin-tight short-shorts and a midriff-baring tank-top. Averted in her genin days.
  • Tomboy and Girly Girl: The tomboy to Emp's girly-girl.
  • Trying to Catch Me Fighting Dirty
  • "Well Done, Son!" Guy: Her clan and her father constantly told her she wasn't good enough, despite her obvious competence, and she took it to heart.
  • We Used to Be Friends: Oyuki and Ninjette were always together back when she was with her clan. Oyuki hated her passionately the entire time.
  • Who Wears Short Shorts?

Caged Demonwolf, Molester of Worlds

Eldritch Abomination captured by Emp in some alien power-draining bondage gear. He lives on her coffee table and spouts ranting, wordy monologues.


The Ayakami Clan

A group of ninja who try to collect the bounty on Ninjette.


A frenemy of Ninjette who's part of her clan. She shows up to repay an as-yet-unspecified favour (Probably the contraceptive jutsu) by dropping off some equipment.
  • Action Girl: We get to see her skills in Vol. 7.
  • Cluster F-Bomb: Combines this ████ing characteristic with Japanese-style formalized language for a f***ing unusual speech pattern.
  • Dark-Skinned Redhead
  • Deadpan Snarker
  • Dude, Not Funny!: Impersonating Mind████. invoked
  • Exact Words: She stated she'd fight three of the Ayakami and she did exactly that
  • Fantasy Contraception:In a Vol 7 flashback Ninjette performed a jutsu on her making sterile so she could be valued for her shinobi skills instead of her uterus, which she may have come to regret.
  • Heads I Win, Tails You Lose: She wants Ninjette to suffer, and she will - either by being killed, or crippled and carted back, or having to fight off ever-stronger ninja because her success at fighting them off proves her value as breeding stock.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold — mmmmmmmaybe. Consider that at the end of her first appearance, she indicated that she considered whatever debt she owed Ninjette to be paid, and that the traitor should expect no further help from her. A few days later (in comic time) she shows up to warn 'Jette that the Ayakami clan — all of them — are coming after 'Jette. It's possible that she did this because she enjoys Ninjette's terror. It's also possible that she actually cares. We shall see.
    • Jerk With A Heart Of Jerk: nope. She was (secretly) gloating over Ninjette's fate in vol. 7 because, whether she won or lost, Ninjette is destined to suffer more. Though if Nine Beers With Ninjette is canon, Ninjette at least already knew this.
  • Master of Disguise
  • Sir Swearsalot
  • The Stoic: In her expressions at least. Adam Warren mentions he accidentally gave her some expression in one scene; he'd intended her to look like a doll.
    • Not So Stoic: Subverted when she proclaims her hatred of Ninjette at the end of Vol. 7, only for it to show that that was what she'd like to say, and her expression stayed frozen.
  • Stripperiffic: The Kaburagi clan wear this season - almost nothing. Like Ninjette, averted as a genin.
  • Wingding Eyes: Sports star-shuriken-shaped pupils.

    The Superhomies 

The superteam that employs Emp. Based on empirical analysis, most of them are either macho, sexist arsewipes or bitchy queens. Somewhat hip-hop themed.

Sistah Spooky AKA Theresa

A demonically-charged sorceress and a senior member of the team. Also a neurotic mess of a woman who continually puts Emp down because she hates and fears blondes. Don't worry, she has a reason.

  • Action Girl
  • Alpha Bitch: Spooky's Back Story (and consequent Freudian Excuse) also has her being cruelly tormented by blonde, voluptuous Libbies whilst herself a child, hence the chip on her shoulder regarding Emp.
  • An Arm and a Leg: Gets her right arm blasted off by one of the worm creatures in Hell. She demonstrated some healing powers earlier, so it remains to be seen whether this will be permanent.
  • Attention Whore: A more realistic version but she desperately craves the praise of her fellow heroes and the public and works hard maintain her image.
  • The Atoner: Sistah Spooky starts showing signs of this in volume 5; she knows she's going to hell so she wants to accomplish some good before then.
  • Berserk Button: Don't say anything about her race. Don't be a beautiful blonde girl. And so on.
  • Bi the Way
    • May not be the case, Vol 7 heavily implies in her memories that she may have always been a lesbian, as the fling with Thugboy was solely to mess with Emp.
  • Black Magician Girl: Ignore the Incredibly Lame Pun.
  • Blondes Are Evil: Her worldview.
  • Broken Bird
  • Combat Stilettos: Goes around in tall platform heels.
  • Dark Magical Girl: Older than the other examples, but still fits the trope.
  • Deal with the Devil: How she got her powers. In her case, she originally just wished for beauty but got mystical powers because the demon she made a deal with screwed up the paperwork. This is eventually revealed to be a lie, the powers were on purpose on his part.
  • Even Evil Has Standards: For how much she hates Emp, she wasn't among the ones who nominated her for a Capey Award as a joke, and actually warned her of what was happening.
    • Furthered in Volume 8, where we learn that Spooky is actually responsible for Emp's bondage-magnet status as a result of Spooky actively willing it to happen to make sure no-one else distracted from her own star rising as a top superhero, which was also something she'd wished for. The standards come in when, having seen Emp in tears one too many times and uncertain as to how she kept going with such humiliation, Spooky actively tried to stop the spell that had rendered Emp a bondage and humiliation magnet for supervillains. It just didn't work.
  • Evil Is Petty: Spooky considers perma-cursing Emp with bondage-magnetism to be her own personal Moral Event Horizon, made worse by the fact that she did it to retain the attention and goodwill of the public. It's... not her proudest moment.
  • The Faceless: Initially, we only see her without her mask in flashbacks.
  • Glowing Eyes of Doom
  • Heel-Face Turn: Possibly. At the end of volume 5, she seems to have finally accepted that Emp isn't the blonde Alpha Bitch her mind makes her out to be. By vol. 7, Major Havoc has replaced Spooky as her nemesis in the introduction.
  • Heroic BSOD
  • In Universe Nickname: "Spookums", from Mind████.
  • Irony: She fears and hates blondes for good reason. She ends up falling in love with one and the one blonde she tries to exact some sort of Revenge by Proxy on turns out to be Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold.
  • Lady of Black Magic
  • My God, What Have I Done?: Is responsible for Emp's own misfortunes out of jealousy. Realizing what she did is one part of her massive self-loathing.
  • Roaring Rampage of Revenge
  • Senseless Sacrifice: Tries to pull this, since she's of the firm belief that she deserves to rot in Hell forever. Of course, Emp firmly tells her where she can stick that nonsense.
  • Stepford Smiler: Magics herself into one after Mind████ dies. Her Frozen Face goes beyond creepy and into outright tragic.
  • Stocking Filler
  • Vain Sorceress: Inverted, the powers were a bonus.
  • You Are Not Alone: Mind████ wanted to invoke this before her death, leaving a small copy of her mind in Spooky's consciousness to mitigate Spooky's worst memories. Afterwards, the timer runs out and it activates. It helps keep her mostly sane and focused.
  • You Are What You Hate: Mind████ takes a peek into Spooky's memories and instantly grasps that her public persona has been subconsciously patterned after the same vain blonde bimbos she was so traumatized by. Both physically (sans actual Blondeness) and personality.

Mind████ AKA Hannah

Intensely telepathic super who's been romantically involved with Sistah Spooky in the past. Stays in orbit most of the time to get away from the background thoughtstream.

Major Havoc

A super-strong, none-too-bright Jerk Jock. That's about it for his character. Because of this, we can cheer when he gets his just desserts. ( Although given that he is one of the one and a half survivors left over when his team confronted Willy Pete...)

  • A Father to His Men: He truly cares for his teammates, just not Emp. His description of trying to save Turbobrain from Willy Pete's fire is quite sad.
  • Asshole Victim: To the Chloroformaster. And arguably to Willy Pete.
  • Bathroom Stall of Overheard Insults: Spreads some nasty rumors/smears to Heronet about Emp.
  • Battle Cry: "'SCUSE ME WHILE I CRY HAVOC!!!"
  • Book Dumb: Another superhero states that he dropped out after third grade. He may have been joking, but still...
  • Break the Haughty:In Vol 7 while he's his normal asshole self he's also absolutely terrified of another encounter with Willy Pete
  • Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: While he's definitely no genius and the degree to which he took Willy Pete lightly bordered on Too Dumb to Live, he's a professional super all right- just look at how he commanded his team when they were preparing to ambush Willy Pete (at least before it all went to hell).
  • Flat Character: He's a macho Flying Brick who hates Emp. So far, that's all we know.
  • Flying Brick
  • Gilligan Cut: He tries to give a rousing speech when the supers are temporarily depowered, saying, "We're still heroes, aren't we?". Cut to him screaming, "Aaaagh! Get it off me!"
  • Godzilla Threshold: Seems to think the fight with Willy Pete qualifies to bring out the big guns. All the other Homeys shut him down pretty quickly, though.
  • Handsome Lech
  • Jerkass
    • Took a Level in Jerkass: This is not an error. Book Six.
    • In the volume seven recap, he's taken over from Spooky as Emp's no. 1 asshole teammate.
  • Jerkass Has a Point: While he goes out of his way to find reasons to doubt Emp's claims of victory, even Emp's allies begrudgingly admit that his arguments aren't totally wrong.
  • Nigh Invulnerable: Willy Pete's fire, which has the heat of a nuke, just knocked him out and destroyed his shirt.
  • The Worf Effect: Have we seen any battles where he didn't get the ████ kicked out of him? Even Ninjette defeats him once (though in his defense, he was at least somewhat drunk at the time).

Capitan Rivet

The leader of the team. Made entirely of metal. Surprisingly, not a jerkass (he has the decency to at least try to suppress his laughter at Emp's humiliation).

  • The Cape: In a world full of superheroes that range from idly idiotic to actively assholish, Capitan Rivet stands out as a (mostly) genuinely nice guy and heroic figure. This may be why Emp idolizes him to the point of wearing underwear with his logo on it.
  • Chrome Champion: Is a stainless steel golem, and was never human to start with.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure
  • The Worf Effect: Have we seen any battles where he didn't get the ████ kicked out of him?

Syndablokk (sic!)

A man with a cinderblock for a head. One of the few truly sympathetic heroes, he gives Emp some fatherly advice and compliments in his first appearance. Volume 8 reveals his secret origin; he drew a deliberately ridiculous superhuman version of himself in an art class, and the teacher transformed him.

Heavy Artillery

Has had only one appearance, where it was commented that he is gay.


A human who got infected with an alien STD and turned into a blob. Wants you to know that his name means "ever-changing" and stuff.

Phallik AKA Bob

Wields his mighty Phallospear; has a fondness for smacking Emp's arse (or 'male-bonding' as he calls it) with it.

Divangelic AKA Vanity & Charity, AKA Courtney

A pair of Conjoined Twins; the twin on the right is Vanity, a devil, wielding a whip; on the left, we have Charity, an angel wielding a kind of morningstar. The mind boggles how they manage to live with each other. Since they were both killed by Willy Pete in #5, we may never find out. Volume 8 revealed that they were formerly a student named Courtney, who was transformed into the superhuman persona she created for an art class assignment.


Once a normal man, he was infected with a lady-bot's nanotech STD after sleeping with her, and turned into a mecha. Still acts as much like a human as possible, to the extent of sleeping and wanking.

    Other Heroes 


A Batman (or Robin?) expy who seems to be the most decent, well-adjusted hero so far. The full French maid dress, stiletto heels and fishnets (with garters) he always wears could be thought of as an endearing character trait. He's introduced to us as a reverse mole.


A former kidnapper of Emp who saw the interest in the market for a Stripperiffic heroine that was constantly getting Bound and Gagged, then used it to great financial effect to become a softcore idol.

  • Absolute Cleavage
  • Bi the Way: Flirts with Emp, Major Havoc, and others.
  • Cat Girl: "Nyaan!"
  • Everyone Has Standards: "Inappropriate, I'm not into breathplay note , jackass."
  • Exact Words: Empowered is gagged from talking about what happened at the superhero awards (other members of the Superhomeys aren't and start spreading nasty rumors about her), so Ocelotina invites her on her show and duct tapes her head so she can't talk so that Ocelotina can say how awesome Emp was.
  • Femme Fatalons
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: She respects Emp and considers her a true hero. Is it sad that, even though she has humiliated Empowered in public and over the internet that she is legitimately magnitudes nicer to our heroine than anyone on Empowered's team?
  • The Load: "Please save me... because I'm really, really cute!".
  • Ms. Fanservice: This is all she is.
  • Sexy Backless Outfit
  • Stocking Filler


Small, cute and wide-eyed superpresenter of "Superdirty Jobs".


Due to the Sorting Algorithm of Evil, most of the villains that have appeared have been comedic and one-shot. That isn't to say the rest weren't serious.

Willy Pete

A man who was turned into a fire elemental, and consequently gained the appetite of fire i.e. insatiable. Was the Witless Minions' (and thus Thugboy's) last employer, so they've got some history between them; it's the kind of history that usually starts with "The rivers ran red with blood...". At least he's presumed to have once been a man; there are quite a few question marks concerning Willy Pete's origin.


A former member of the Superhomies, until he was publicly humiliated (Carrie-style) at an awards ceremony, then disappeared, or so they thought; he used his powers to secretly remould himself into a brand-new super, dWARf!, who was then accepted back in to the team.

  • Chekhov's Gunman: Both played straight (to a degree) and subverted; Fleshmaster is mentioned several times during Volume Four as part of the Capeys' debacle that could prove to be Emp's eventual fate if she wins anything - since it's a proven fact (and alarmingly, Sistah Spooky seems aware of this) that the suprahuman community is a bunch of dicks - but we never meet him. Turns out he was under their nose all along as dWARf, which is revealed in a stellar scene mentioned below. Ironically, dWARf sets himself up to be found out by Emp.
  • Clipped Wing Angel: In his fight with Emp he uses his bio-editing powers to become a monstrous giant...which doesn't even get one hit in before Emp pounds him into the floor.
  • Curb-Stomp Battle: Emp defeats him very quickly. She does not even let him take advantage of his powers.
  • Kick the Dog:He promised to spare Emp's friends if she gave him a blowjob at his moment of triumph. Emp didn't take kindly to that.
  • The Mole
  • Not So Different
  • Pintsized Powerhouse: Afterwards, of course.
  • Reunion Revenge
  • Revenge of the Nerd: Gender-flipped. Sanity-flipped as well.


A Littlest Cancer Patient who met Emp thanks to the Grant-A-Wish Foundation in order to tie her up. His greatest dream was to become a supervillain. Through a strange series of events he managed to attain superhuman intelligence and (possibly) cure himself.

  • Affably Evil: To an extreme degree. The mad respect he has for Emp makes for a jarring contrast with the disrespect her own teammates show her.
  • Chessmaster: How he's shaping up so far.
  • Friendly Enemy: He's indebted to Emp and worships her because he could finally play "Ropehappy Supervillain" with her.
  • Kid-anova: Manny has a bit of this.
  • Littlest Cancer Patient
  • Mecha-Mooks: Last seen with an army of robot henchmen... that he named after Emp.


A necromancer style supervillain who preys upon the SuperDead.

  • And I Must Scream: The fate of any SuperDead he captures.
  • Demonic Possession: is used as a mouthpiece by the devil that accidentally gave Sistah Spooky her powers. After the conversation ends, Deathmonger regains control and notes that he "lost a few minutes."
  • The Dreaded
  • Due to the Dead: Ha, no.
  • Evil Genius: Was a superscience savant before becoming a criminal. And before he died.
  • Foreshadowing: Warned by Manny himself, to not take Emp lightly.
  • The Ghost: Deathmonger was mentioned in the very first story of volume 1 as the villain the Superhomies were arguing over how to defeat. Later in that volume was described as "a popular sell out supervillain" and an "overhyped jackass" by a disgruntled Big Iron. He was the central villain of the chapter 'Diseased Wench' with an army of "scythebots" but since Emp never made it to the battle nothing of him was seen. After volume 1 he dropped out of the series until volume 6- where he finally appeared after having been reimagined as The Dreaded that he was. Even then, his mask still left him as The Faceless.
  • Hero Killer
  • Hoist by His Own Petard: Several:
    • Emp lassos him with a Super tongue he severed, causing Ubiquitease, a SuperDead he enslaved, to leave without him at just the right moment.
    • He sets Tommy Tokamak's carcass, which is powering his facility, to detonate his Collapsing Lair... And it does, with him inside thanks to Emp... although it appears that teleport sparkles are appearing around him before the explosion.
  • I Love the Dead: Seems to give off this vibe.
  • Magic from Technology
  • Necromancer
  • Night of the Living Mooks: Literally. The SuperDead, as a result of their abilities, are aware and helpless to do his bidding.
  • Retcon: From his early mentions in volume 1, nothing about Deathmonger suggested that he was anything other than a death-themed supervillain commanding an army of "scythebots", although in the first chapter Emp mentioned him drawing power from a "pan-dimensional link" which she suggested the Superhomies try to cut off. When he reappeared in volume 6, he was reimagined as an actual Necromancer who commands armies of the superdead. This could be purposeful on his part as the cover story on the subject benefits his activities, but the apparent difference was never addressed. However, in volume 6, a bunch of robots with scythe limbs are also seen around the lair, so this may not be as big a retcon as we think.
  • Skeletons in the Coat Closet: He wears the skull of the superhero Impakt as a mask.

Ninjette's Father

This so-far-unnamed ninja is the leader of Ninjette's ninja clan, the source of her issues and a complete bastard.
  • Abusive Dad: Volume 7 reveals just how horrible he is.
  • Action Dad: The scary kind.
  • The Alcoholic
  • Archnemesis Dad
  • Ax-Crazy: Sometimes there's just no excuse other than this.
  • Disproportionate Retribution: I mean, full scale war with an allied clan over your kid chucking her virginity at one of their princes? Yes, it wrecked a potential alliance marriage with a third party (the clan head in question insisted on a virgin teenage bride) but now you're further in the hole.
  • The Faceless: We only ever see his body, his facial profile with his hair obscuring his eyes, or his hand either holding a beer or reaching for Ninjette...
  • Sadist Teacher
  • Terms of Endangerment: Refers to Ninjette by her first name with the "chan" honorific attached, which tends to make whatever he's doing while calling her this even creepier...
  • Villainous Valor: In an interesting way. In preparation for her final battle with the Ayakami, Ninjette drinks, explaining that she won't walk "into a scenario likely to result in [her] death and/or dismemberment without first getting good and solidly buzzed...." Oyuki responds that Ninjette's father often says something very similar before going into battle. It reminds us that, evil though he be, Ninjette's father is still a man, who feels fear, and possibly other human feelings. That one moment renders him easily the most human of the villains in the comic (save, of course, for Manny).

Infernal Service Provider

The demon Sistah Spooky sold her soul to for supernatural hotness, and due to a misplaced decimal point, was granted massive magical power as well. The ISP tried to correct the error quietly, but Spooky's hero actions made this impossible, and his superiors caught wind of the monumental mixup. He has no intention whatsoever of letting Spooky off the hook for this.

  • Batman Gambit: Granted Spooky and several others too much power on purpose, so he could eventually force one into taking his place. Only Spooky took the bait.
    • He also claims to have had some sort of involvement in Mind███'s death somehow.
  • Ironic Hell: His existence is one. A salesman who hated his job when alive, a salesman who hates his job while dead.
  • Faux Affably Evil: Calls Sistah Spooky "Sunshine", and claims to be moved to proverbial tears over her reuniting with Mind███, but it's painfully obvious he doesn't have a sincere bone in his body.
  • Like a Badass out of Hell: His Evil Plan.
  • Taking You with Me: When Sistah Spooky gives him the complete thrashing he deserves, he calls for Hell Security to kill them all.
  • Villains Never Lie: Played with. He lied about the transaction mishap being a mishap, and seemingly lied about Mind███ being in Hell. But the latter was unfortunately very very true.
  • Would Repeatedly Bash A Girl's Head Into The Metal Floor

Mind████'s Brother

  • Be Careful What You Wish For: According to Mind████, he was overcome by fear and confusion thanks to constantly reading the ickier thoughts of everyone around him, and altered his own personality so that he'd never fear anything again. This, unfortunately, turned him into a complete sociopath.
  • Chekhov M.I.A.: So far, has appeared on-panel only in a Flashback Nightmare, but he casts enough of a shadow over the series that he's pretty certain to appear at some point.
  • People Puppets: Used this power to force his sister to cut out her own tongue and eyes.

Wet Blanket

A wimpy villain with a potentially devastating power: he can negate other supers' abilities.