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Empowered and Friends
Empowered, AKA Elissa Megan Powers
The main character. A sweet, beautiful (despite what she thinks) and kind young woman who had dreams of fighting crime from a young age, but got saddled with an unreliable supersuit that showed everything.
- Action Girl: Her success average may not be as great as, say, Ninjette or Sistah Spooky, but Emp is still a moderately competent superhero.
- Affirmative Action Girl: The Superhomeys made her a member because of some "gender quota", not because she was an awesome superhero.
- Ambiguously Bi: Ninjette has referred to her as "Miss Three-Drinks-And-I'm-Bisexual," and she didn't at all mind kissing Daisycutter.
- Animal-Eared Headband: As Schrodinger's Cat Girl.
- Aren't You Going to Ravish Me?: In volume 1 of Empowered, she is captured by a robot "Pimpotron" that scans her to see if she's worthy of a galactic harem. After deciding her butt was too big, it leaves her behind. She is clearly more devastated by the insult than relieved at her good fortune.
- Ascended Fanboy: Loves superheroes so much that she took it as a college course. Then she became one and found out what most of the 'heroes' in her chosen superteam were like. She still fangirls over the leader of the Superhomeys, to the point of themed underwear.
- Awesomeness by Analysis: Often. Though her crowning moment might have been figuring out how Deathmonger could find a newly risen SuperDead.
- Berserk Button: Don't compare her to JLo, or say anything else that might be misunderstood as "you're fat".
- Brains and Bondage: Played with, as Emp is much more into cosplay and roleplaying in bed than bondage per se, but among the roleplaying fantasies that she enjoys is one in which she is a rebellious slave girl whom Thugboy has to discipline. She also tells Ninjette that she likes it when Thugboy is very dominant with her in bed, and that she once provoked him into behaving that way by making a pun on the phrase "tie me up" (she was wearing an apron at the time, and nothing else, but had left it untied in the back). Also, in reference to when she first met Thugboy, Ocelotina later commented "That guy was practically making love to you with that rope!" As a general rule, however, Emp finds being tied up by criminals (super or otherwise) to be demeaning and traumatizing, and in no way a turn on; she is also very dismayed that she has gotten a reputation to the contrary.
- Broken Bird: Played with. Emp's childhood was generally a happy one, and her parents were loving and supportive, but watching her father die of an aneurysm right in front of her deeply traumatized her, and unsurprisingly still affects her to the present. Her relationship with her mother still seems to be a good one, based on what we've seen of it, and she is, in many ways, one of the best-adjusted characters in the series. Her issues are just more apparent because of how much she wears her heart on her sleeve.
- Buffy Speak: Of the "intelligent but ignorant of proper terminology" variant.
- Chronic Hero Syndrome: Our best guess for what keeps her going in spite of outright sickeningly terrifying humiliation day after day.
- Clothes Make the Superman: Empowered's powers come from her suit; she's just a normal person otherwise although she might have a Photographic Memory and uses this to save herself in Volume 9.
- Combat Pragmatist: She used Maid Man's status as The Dreaded to distract supervillains by telling them he was behind them and then blast them in the back when they turned in horror. She also demonstrated that, while picking up a car and throwing it at a villain may look cool, driving said car into the villain at 70+ mph is much more effective.
- Combo Platter Powers: Has quite a lot of varying powers that don't seem to have much relation to each other, (though it is repeatedly theorised that they're tied to her personality and self-image in some way).
- A Degree in Useless: Emp studied Suprahuman Studies which lots of people say is useless but it helps her quite a bit in her career as a superhero, once against Crimera, and then again against Animal Style.
- Distressed Damsel: Captured and threatened by villains is kind of her thing, poor kid. however incredibly brave and has her legitimate Action Girl moments. Sometimes she can even rescue herself.
- Dumb Blonde: Subverted - Emp talks like a Valley Girl, but is actually quite smart.
- Empathic Weapon: Her supersuit, apparently a sapient being. Also, it's been suggested that her body issues are what keep the suit so fragile, which produces gratuitous nudity and augments her body issues, which obviously doesn't lead anywhere good. As long as it remains intact, it comes with
- It gives her Super Strength and some degree of Nigh-Invulnerability under certain conditions. It acts like ablative armour; bullets and blows tear off bits of the suit but leave her undamaged. If there's at least a tattered bikini's worth left of the suit, she can survive a ten-story fall.
- It gives her Kamehame Hadoken, which varies wildly in power depending on a number of factors, including how confident she feels.
- Her mask gives her enhanced vision, enough to spot a burgeoning aneurysm in a man's head. She's claimed that it's not one of her "cool powers", so even though it sticks around after her suit is torn, it doesn't come up much.
- Suit Invisibility. That is to say her suit turns invisible, but she doesn't, leaving her naked. Again. Which, given what villains know about a "suitless" Emp, has its uses.
- Gecko-like adhesion to walls and ceilings
- Full protection from the vacuum of space, even allowing speech.
- The ability to interface with at least some alien technologies.
- Escape Artist: Not to the point where it would undermine the comic's premise, but spending so much time captured has given her a lot of practice at freeing herself from bonds - something a few overconfident supervillains have discovered to their cost.
- Even the Girls Want Her: In-comic, the girl who'll become Ocelotina. And quite possibly Ninjette as well, if the nigh-omniscient Caged Demonwolf is correct.
- Everyone Loves Blondes: To her dismay.
- Expy: Empowered is largely derivative of the character Social Butterfly from Livewires (created by the same author), which Emp draws our attention to herself
- Fetish Retardant: Getting tied up in serious situations makes bondage a SERIOUS turn-off for Emp and ThugBoy.
- For Halloween, I Am Going as Myself: It's her part-time job - making public appearances with other lookalikes as herself. The "Southern" accent she affects might be an effort to stop the disguise from being too realistic.
- Future Loser: Has this in a kind of Imagine Spot, where kid Emp meets her future superheroine self.Kid Emp: Why do I have such a big butt as a grownup...? How did I wind up so old and f-fat...?
Current Emp: Thanks a lot, younger version of me.
- Geek: She is a Yaoi Fangirl and took "superhuman studies" at college. OK, if you consider her looks, make that Hollywood Geek.
- Glass Cannon: Emp can kick major ass when her suit is intact. Unfortunately, just one hit can reduce it to tatters, although later in the series she can keep her powers and continue to kick ass even after losing a good portion of the suit. A literal cannon made of glass looks positively indestructible by comparison.
- Guile Hero: For someone so accident-prone and with so many self-esteem issues, she is surprisingly good at tricking and manipulating the supervillains who capture her.
- Hartman Hips: One of the things she's least pleased about with her body. Nobody else knows why.
- Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold: She's blonde, and she's one of the few actually heroic heroes.
- The Heart: Her greatest power seems not to be her suit, but her compassion. It pays off big time with the Super Dead, treating them with respect and kindness.
- Heroic Self-Deprecation: It becomes clear fairly quickly that Emp is a significantly more competent hero than she gives herself credit for. After this being pointed out by Ninjette, Thugboy, the Caged Demonwolf, Mind████, and Maidman, she's starting to believe it.
- Hot Librarian: Ends up convinced to dress as one by the other Superhomeys so she can infiltrate the lair of a villain who takes a liking to this style of dress. Thug Boy ends up being even more pleased with this turn of events.
- Imagination-Based Superpower: Her suit can do a lot of things but she hasn't figured out all its functions.
- Lethal Chef: The only food she can cook is blueberry pancakes, and even those taste terrible.
- Let's Get Dangerous!: Once or twice per issue, Empowered will actually take down a villain, often a powerful or dangerous one, or one whom no other hero can handle under those circumstances.
- Examples of this include:
- When she defeated Anglerfish and his gang.
- When she defeats Deathmonger, one of the most feared supervillains in the world.
- When she blasted those ninja into little specks of carbonized particles.
- The beatdown she unleashed on a Not So Different Rogue Cape at the end of book 4 certainly does.
- When she defeats, and cages, the Caged Demonwolf.
- Even earlier than both of those examples was her effortless rescue of ThugBoy in Vol. 1, which was pretty much foreshadowing the above incidents.
- At one point she completely lost her temper, and nearly killed a villain by ripping off her own bodice and suffocating him with it. She stopped herself in time, and felt horribly guilty after.
- Her terrifying thrashing of Animal Style, the six members group of supervillains in animal-themed powered armour.
- Lust Object: For several Superhomeys, especially Major Havoc and Ocelotina.
- Meta Guy: In between the chapters, Emp comments on the story and her role in it. Most prominently when she drew attention to Adam Warren's Kill 'em All tendencies in his previous works and started freaking out that she might be next on the chopping block. 'S all right Emp, your name's on the cover (although even that's not enough to reassure her, as she worries it could refer to the concept of being empowered, rather than the person Empowered).
- Ms. Fanservice: Also Ms. Fanservice in-universe due to the nature of her suit and God, does she hate it.
- Most Common Superpower: Many of her powers are often in doubt. Not this one, to Emp's constant annoyance.
- Naked Apron: Thugboy is grateful.
- New Powers as the Plot Demands: Her supersuit didn't come with instructions, so she is continually discovering what it can do by accident. She even lampshades it. At the start, she comes with the powers listed above. By now, it's added Mix and Match of Power Floats and Power Gives You Wings, X-Ray Vision, which she uses this to save the life of a Punch-Clock Villain, copying thoughtstreams, automatic translation of any text into (bad) English, Grey Goo protection, Interfacing with a nanotech mechanical human's brain by sticking her fingers in to his head, an emergency 'wing mode' that's capable of lethal blasts and powered flight and It even makes phone calls!
- No Respect Guy:
- One would think Empowered saving her teammates' hides more than once would earn her a little less outright abuse. Mind you, often they simply don't notice — for example, she rams a villain with a Humvee going 70 MPH, pointing out that this works much better than just throwing it at the villain, only to have the resulting wreck immobilize her and letting her "team" wander off assuming the other heroes and the villain knocked each other out.
- After the events of Vol. 5, Sistah Spooky might just be warming up to her a bit. Confirmed by volumes 8 and 10, where Spooky says outright that she's kinda proud of Emp.
- A better question was how she managed to avoid getting respect after one-shotting a world-destroying demon lord that had just wiped the floor with every other superhero combined. She only got respect from Capitan Rivet, who generally treats her with respect anyway.
- Finally averted at the start of volume seven by the Super Dead who call out the Superhomies for their mistreatment of them and her and appoint Emp as their new representative on the Homies' council. A later chapter shows she does in fact now have that job, which required the Homeys promote her up from part-timer. Even still many of the Superhomies proper don't like her.
- At the end of volume nine, she calls the Superhomies' overseeing council out on this mindset and, after summing up just what she's accomplished in that volume alone, demands to be made a full member of the team instead of an associate. She might just get it, too.
- In Volume 10 it becomes official, the team votes and she is officially a full-time member. In the same volume she also gets lots of love from Sistah Spooky.
- One-Note Cook: The only food she can cook is blueberry pancakes. (In a Naked Apron, which is even better!)
- Plucky Girl: Despite abuse and suit failures, she doesn't give up.
- Power Palms: How she fires her power blasts.
- Power Perversion Potential: According to her, her suit's Empathic Weapon status also increases her overall sensitivity... which makes it rather fun in bed.
- Reluctant Fanservice Girl: The suit is skin tight and this makes her self-conscious. Well, more self-conscious.
- Samaritan Syndrome: Emp's always wanted to be a superhero; she gained extra motivation after seeing her father die in front of her, though she's since come to terms with that particular trauma.
- Sex Goddess: Though her level of sexual experience is unclear, Thugboy claims he could barely last ten seconds in bed with her early on, and had to beg her to slow down when she first performed oral sex. This is, at least part, due to the sensual amplification of her suit.
- She's Got Legs: Focused on especially while wearing her Hot Librarian costume.
- Signature Sound Effect: VORPP
- Silent Treatment: Emp does this to Thugboy whenever he seriously upsets her.
- So Beautiful, It's a Curse: Her central conflict, at least in early volumes. Emp is nearly any man's walking sex fantasy, being a young, gorgeous blonde girl with ample breasts, a shapely rear and a generally voluptuous, desirable body, who dresses in a skin-tight suit which is almost always in tatters. She, however, considers herself ugly and overweight, and would rather have any other power than have to wear her suit. Not only that, but most of the people who find her attractive also have zero respect for her and actively degrade or take advantage of her at every opportunity, fuelling her insecurities.
- Super Mode: Whenever the suit is in real danger, it seemingly takes over and displays startling power. It also erases Emp's memory of any ability it used.
- Steven Ulysses Perhero: Elissa Megan Powers
- To Hell and Back: Decided to follow Spooky in her attempt to break Mind████ out of hell. When that resulted in a scam from Spooky's demonic services provider, who was trying to break out by having Spooky take his place, Emp beat the crap out of the demon, fought off the security and broke out of hell, dragging a suicidal Spooky with her.
- Tomboy and Girly Girl: The Girly Girl beside Ninjette.
- Trauma Button: Fruity Flakes cereal, which she was eating when her father died in front of her. Even looking at it causes a Freak-Out.
- Underestimating Badassery: To this date, only one supervillain did not underestimate her before being thrashed. And many do it even after being thrashed, as they have no idea she's doing it.
- Vapor Wear: Her suit's tightness and fragility means that wearing any form of undergarment, including panties or a bra, renders it not only unsightly but useless. Even further, she has to shave her "nether region" bare to wear it.
- Wardrobe Malfunction: A super powered variant. While attempting to show Ninjette and Thugboy her suit's invisibility powers by making her mask invisible, she accidentally ends up making the entire thing disappear... while wearing absolutely nothing underneath. Naturally, she also happens to have both hands stretched overhead as this happens (to hold up a car), leaving her body completely exposed.
- Yaoi Fangirl: Her response to hearing that one of her teammates was gay? Start shipping him with the other men.
Emp's boyfriend and lover. Ex-minion. Has quite a few skeletons in his closet from his younger days.
- Badass Normal: No superpowers of any kind, but still more than a match for a lot of capes.
- Berserk Button: When he recognizes the cape who killed the Holy Avenger near the end of volume 4, he almost shoots him in front of a hundred other supers before he's stopped by Ninjette.
- Bigger Is Better in Bed: A story in volume 1 briefly featured Emp commenting that he's bigger than any other guy she's been with. This is, apparently, a cherished memory for Thugboy.
- Cold Sniper: Zigzagged; he can be very cold and ruthless when fighting, but he's quite warm and affectionate with his friends and, especially, Emp. Also, the men he's killed often show up in his nightmares, it's implied.
- Combat Pragmatist: Particularly in his cape-killer days he often uses a cape's or a super villain's weaknesses and flaws against them and will play extremely dirty if need be. A brief flashback in volume 6 shows him giving a step-by-step guide to attacking a superhero funeral that doesn't involve being a suicide bomber. Vol. 7 shows him expounding on the virtues of invoking Kill It with Fire on supers.
- Cool Shades: He even wears them indoors.
- Dark and Troubled Past: He was part of an underground anti-Cape conspiracy who eventually went on a Cape-killing spree in San Antonio; this went about as well as you'd expect and he's the only one involved that we know survived — and that only because the Cape about to vaporise him with an energy blast was so busy gloating he got hit by a bus. He then formed a new gang of minions for hire that secretly manipulated and stole from their supervillain employers, until they tried to pull that trick on Willy Pete. ThugBoy was the only one who got away alive, forced to watch as Willy Pete alternately raped his friends in the eyes with his flaming phallus and ate them. Is it any wonder he has nightmares?
- Dark Secret: He's the last known survivor of the Capekillers who were involved in the San Antonio incident. If this got out, every Cape, hero or villain, would probably want to dismember him.
- Expository Hairstyle Change: After the other Witless Minions got killed by Willy Pete, ThugBoy went into permanent "Whatever" mode until he met Emp and let his hair grow out.
- Fetish Retardant: Getting tied up in serious situations makes bondage a SERIOUS turn-off for Emp and ThugBoy.
- Guns Akimbo: Fights like this when he uses the laser-pistols of a cowboy-themed cape, though since the guns need to be cocked by hand after each shot (a stupidity he fully lampshades,) it's less ridiculous than a lot of examples.
- The Gunslinger: Is a mix of A & D, D when it comes to handguns and A when it comes to sniper rifles.
- Hell-Bent for Leather: If he hasn't a Shirtless Scene, as is most often the case.
- Honor Before Reason: No danger will stop him from praising a booty so fine.
- Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: OK, Emp isn't really very tiny, but ThugBoy TOWERS over her. Just look in the first chapter of volume 2 where he's carrying her with one hand. Ninjette is genuinely tiny, although she and ThugBoy aren't a couple - at least, not right now.
- Love at First Sight: With Empowered; he gets taken out of his constant "whatever" state as soon as he lays eyes on her.
- Love Redeems: A criminal and murderer (albeit one with standards) prior to meeting her, he's now firmly one of the good guys (if only because Emp herself is such an angel).
- Mr. Fanservice: Both in terms of looks and personality, and with plenty of sexy scenes which focus on him as much as on Emp.
- Muggle Power: Of the "kill 'em" variation, though he's toned this down, tries to avoid letting it be known he was this way once, and is in love with one of the few decent super-heroes in the business.
- Never Live It Down: In-universe, working for Spartan 3000.
- One Head Taller: Than Emp.
- Only Known by Their Nickname: A bonus strip on Adam Warren's DeviantArt page confirms that Emp does know his actual name, he just prefers to be called ThugBoy.
- Punch-Clock Villain: What he used to be.
- Raging Stiffie: A problem for ThugBoy when sharing a bed with Ninjette. Or Emp.
- Shirtless Scene: Frequently walks around in just his boxers.
- Troubled, but Cute: Oh lord, so much. Physically gorgeous with a dark and traumatic past that doesn't stop him from being a dream boyfriend? He's a textbook example.
- Wham Shot: The very end of volume 6 reveals that he's started capekilling again. And this time, it's not even for revenge; it's just so he doesn't have to get a job!
- The end of Volume 10 reveals that he's still ripping off villains. Emp finds out, and after the ensuing argument he uses a Villain's mace to whack her off the roof they're standing on, as he's being mindcontrolled by Mind████'s brother.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: ThugBoy freaks out at the prospect of getting involved with Willy Pete again. Of course, since Willy Pete is a Nigh Invulnerable — indeed, arguably truly invulnerable, even being immune to ThugBoy's patented fire-based cape-killer tricks — psychotic monster with nuke-grade fire attacks and a penchant for murderous rape and cannibalism, it's rather an understandable fear. Especially because Willy Pete has a particular grudge against ThugBoy for escaping him once before.
Ninjette, AKA Kozue Kaburagi
Emp's best friend and part-time Lancer. Originally introduced to us as a Punch-Clock Villain, she quickly turned into a sparky, confident foil and emotional support for the self-doubting main character. Then plot happened, and we discovered why she drinks so much...
- Abusive Parents: There's no way to properly convey just how horribly nightmarish Ninjette's father is, or the living hell she was raised in as a result.
- A-Cup Angst: Flat as two peas on an ironing board, and knows about her lack of the Most Common Superpower.
- Action Girl: Able to mop the floor with some Unskilled, but Strong capes and multiple highly skilled ninja.
- The Alcoholic: As she reveals in "Nine Beers with Ninjette", 'Jette's aware she has a problem, that she can't stop drinking - in fact, she's only been sober four nights since leaving home, which she spent with Emp.
- Badass Normal: Almost to Charles Atlas Superpower levels. E.g. can identify people from 20 feet away by scent alone.
- Badass Princess: Definitely doesn't want to be a princess, but it still stands.
- Bare Your Midriff
- Berserk Button/Compliment Backfire: Ninjette doesn't like to be called a "happy, pleasant drunk". Daddy issues, you know. Although she does admit that she is one in "Nine Beers with Ninjette."
- Don't mess with Emp. In an Imagine Spot, Spooky finds this out the hard way.
- Celibate Hero: Ninjette seems to be be enhancing her Mad Ninja Skillz by avoiding sex, although she is allowed... It's more of a Freudian thing, because she dearly wants to, but as a princess in a Hidden Elf Village she was not allowed, and the only other man she likes now is attached to Empowered. The ensuing frustration causes her to focus her attention on ninjaing.
- Charles Atlas Superpower: With a sprinkling of ninja magic on top.
- Combat Pragmatist: Uses decoys, bombs and revealed infidelity against the Ayakami clan in Vol 7.
- A Date with Rosie Palms: Often. Sometimes even lets the Demonwolf watch!
- Drowning My Sorrows: How she became a Hard-Drinking Party Girl.
- Drunken Master: Probably the most formidable martial artist yet seen, and she actively tries to avoid being completely sober.
- Fate Worse Than Death: Averted — before she was rescued by Emp, she narrowly avoided having her hands and feet cut off to facilitate her use as ninja breeding stock. Invoked later, when she tells Emp what could have happened.
- Gratuitous Japanese: Justified. She was given a full Japanese name to make up for the dilution in the bloodline.
- Hard-Drinking Party Girl: She sometimes demonstrates the disadvantages of heavy drinking.Ninjette: Yet another idea that seemed brilliant when I had a buzz on... turns out to kinda suck once I've sobered up a little.
- Highly Visible Ninja: Her clothes don't exactly lend themselves to stealth.
- I Just Want to Have Friends: Type B. Admits to being scared of losing Emp's friendship as her social standing slowly improves. The thought of losing her terrifies Ninjette as she is her first and only friend.
- Informed Attribute: Parodied due to the manga-esque art. Despite her name, Ninjette is Caucasian.
- Intimate Marks: Invoked. She intentionally wears booty shorts with her name across the booty.
- Inverse Ninja Law: Averted in that while she's uber-skilled and can take on 3-4 opponents alone, she has come close to dying several times when she was confronted with any more than that. Which is why she blackmails Oyuki-chan into helping with the rest of the Ayakami and pulls out every dirty trick in the book to even the odds.
- In Vino Veritas: She has a ninja technique based on it: drink in her presence, and she can get you to spill all the beans. She also knows a technique that makes sure it won't work on her.
- Made of Iron: Seems to recover remarkably fast from what would normally be pretty traumatic injury, even without the help of Suprahuman medical science...however...
- Dented Iron: Volume 8 reveals that much of her supposed recovery is powerful illusion hiding all the bruises, scars, and blunt force trauma she's still carrying, in order to put up a strong face for Emp.
- Master of Disguise: All ninja are taught "hensojutsu", but she's exceptional. To the point where she consummated a marriage whilst disguised as the groom.
- McNinja: Played with; she looks completely caucasian due to her Japanese bloodline being diluted after several generations in America, but her parents tried to actively Defy this trope by giving her a fully Japanese name.
- Mid-Season Upgrade: Captain Katana wills the sword stuck in his head to Ninjette. It's a magic blade that can "cut though just about anything". In training she effortlessly cuts though rock golems created by Cyndablokk.
- Missing Mom: Dead, according to "Nine Beers with Ninjette"; her father blames her for it.
- Mukokuseki: Subverted. Ninjette is actually from New Jersey, and is of European descent.
- Not So Different: Oyuki could not resist noting how akin to her father's combat style the vicious and underhanded tactics she demonstrated in vol. 7 were.Ninjette: If you think that I am voluntarily walking into a scenario likely to result in my death and/or dismemberment without first getting good and solidly buzzed... you are sadly f**king mistaken.
Oyuki: By sheerest f**king coincidence, this humble genin has often heard a remarkably f**king similar sentiment voiced before battle... by Kaburagi-san's own f**king father, interestingly enough.
- Pressure Point: A realistic example; she uses one to paralyse Thugboy's gun arm when he's about to do something stupid (see his Berserk Button above), but in actual combat she's just as likely to rely on brute force and simple Combat Pragmatism.
- Rebellious Princess: A particularly tragic variant, since "princess" to her clan means pregnancy machine. Hands and feet are considered optional.
- Sex Magic: Inverted. Empowered and Thugboy are both very hot, and constantly shagging. Ninjette can use the sexual frustration created by their failure to have sex with her to boost her ninja magic.
- Sexy Walk: There's even a secret ninja magic to do it. "You move like a ████ing jungle cat!"
- Stripperiffic: Unlike Emp, she does this willingly with skin-tight short-shorts and a midriff-baring tank-top. Averted in her genin days.
- Tomboy and Girly Girl: The tomboy to Emp's girly-girl.
- Trying to Catch Me Fighting Dirty: Anything goes in a fight.
- "Well Done, Son!" Guy: Her clan and her father constantly told her she wasn't good enough, despite her obvious competence, and she took it to heart. Played with now in that she passionately detests her father for a number of reasons and apparently nearly succeeded in killing him, so has no intention of earning his approval now, but still suffers from residual self-esteem issues.
- We Used to Be Friends: Oyuki and Ninjette were always together back when she was with her clan. Oyuki hated her passionately the entire time.
- Who Wears Short Shorts?: Her trademark booty shorts with her name across the back.
Caged Demonwolf, Molester of Worlds
Eldritch Abomination captured by Emp in some alien power-draining bondage gear. He lives on her coffee table and spouts ranting, wordy monologues.
- Affably Evil: to the point that, world-destroying Eldritch Abomination or not, he's basically a good guy—being one of the comparatively few people who has a high opinion of Empowered. He certainly doesn't seem to mind hanging out on Emp's coffee table watching TV for the time being. Because to him, it's merely a blip in his immortal existence.
- Confusing Multiple Negatives: Peppers them as part of his long-windedness.
- Deadpan Snarker: Hammy Snarker, more like.
- Eldritch Abomination: Before he was sealed, nobody could match him.
- Expospeak Gag: Fond of these, his unique rendition of the song "Baby Got Back" being something of a world-record in this department.
- Geek: The other Eldritch Abominations never would invite him to their world-wrecking parties. Making him a kind of Woobie, Destroyer of Worlds (not his own, though).
- Greek Chorus: Narrates some of the less clear events of the story, either directly to the reader or to people who are in the room with him, including Emp's suit.
- Hidden Depths: After six volumes of overly wordy monologues, he drops the mask and reveals that not only can he speak normally, he was once mortal and can see backwards and forwards in time, like Dr. Manhattan.
- The Imp (post-sealing) he's mildly annoying at worst, and often quite nice.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: He's one of the few individuals who respects Emp, and helps cheer her up when she goes through a major depression.
- He's also respectful and maybe in love with Ninjette, and in one memorable monologue tells Ninjette in a normal voice that as an immortal interdimensional being who will outlive our own universe, he will carry his memory of her with him forever. But he only does this when she's drunk to the point of blacking out, so she'd never remember him saying this.
- Large Ham: Virtually every word he speaks is heavily emphasised, and he uses the most overblown vocabulary he possibly can, except for the one time in volume 7 he speaks normally to Ninjette.
- Lovable Sex Maniac: Excessively voyeuristic and with a very active imagination, he is nonetheless a firm friend and his requests to watch sexual acts in progress are treated as harmless.
- The Nicknamer: Emp is "the Alpha Wench", Thugboy is "the Boy of Thug" (if he's not the P-whipped princeling), Ninjette is "the Ninja Wench" or "the boobless booby", Sistah Spooky is "the mystical Wench", Mind████ is the Sapphic/Psychosensual Wench, and so on. Also counts as a parody of Superhero Sobriquets.
- Odd Friendship: In addition to his friendships with Empowered and her friends, he also has chats with Emp's suit on a regular basis, and often makes her call up Emp's mom, so they can chat.
- Only Sane Man: The threshold for this is not that high. That an Eldritch Abomination that habitually describes himself as "The Caged Demonwolf, Molester of Worlds" gets to be the Only Sane Man in the cast tells you everything about this comic you needed to know in one sentence.
- Sealed Evil in a Can: A friendly Evil, but it's still a good thing he's in a belt.
- Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: With a healthy dose of Added Alliterative Appeal (lampshaded by himself at times).
- Shipper on Deck: Wants to watch Empowered, ThugBoy, and Ninjette have a threesome...
- Third-Person Person: Usually refers to himself either as "the Caged Demonwolf" or by one of the many alternative titles he's adopted.
- Time Abyss: Specifically states that he will outlive the universe. One of the main reasons he doesn't make too much fuss about being stuck inside a belt with nothing to do but watch TV all day. To him, this is little more than a very brief inconvenience.
- Yuri Fan: ...and sometimes, only Emp and 'Jette.
The Ayakami Clan
The Ayakami Clan
A group of ninja who try to collect the bounty on Ninjette.
- Chain Pain: Ninjette comments on their love of chained weaponry in Vol 7.
- Dark Action Girl: Many of them are women and none of them hesitate to fight.
- Even Evil Has Standards: They consider the Kaburagi as fucked up, and say as much when Oyuki offers to give a hand to a bound Ninjette and then throw her a severed hand.
- Feel No Pain: Their clan-specific jutsu, which makes killing them very difficult and strenuous.
- Killed Off for Real: Ninjette killed the whole clan.
- Malevolent Masked Men: All of them wear Japanese themed masks while on the job.
- Roaring Rampage of Revenge: Against Ninjette, for escaping and killing several of their genin. Run, 'Jette. RUN.
- Would Hit a Girl: Considering they're trying to collect a bounty on Ninjette's head.
- Your Cheating Heart:Ninjette reveals this to one of the clan members to distract them so she can get free and kill the last three.
A frenemy of Ninjette who's part of her clan. She shows up to repay an as-yet-unspecified favour by dropping off some equipment.
- Action Girl: We get to see her skills in Vol. 7.
- Cluster F-Bomb: Combines this ████ing characteristic with Japanese-style formalized language for a f***ing unusual speech pattern.
- Dark-Skinned Redhead: As can been seen on the full-colour cover of volume 7.
- Dude, Not Funny!: Impersonating Mind████.
- Exact Words: She stated she'd fight three of the Ayakami and she did exactly that
- Fantasy Contraception:In a Vol 7 flashback Ninjette performed a jutsu on her making sterile so she could be valued for her shinobi skills instead of her uterus, which she may have come to regret.
- Heads I Win, Tails You Lose: She wants Ninjette to suffer, and she will - either by being killed, or crippled and carted back, or having to fight off ever-stronger ninja because her success at fighting them off proves her value as breeding stock.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Mmmmmmmaybe. Consider that at the end of her first appearance, she indicated that she considered whatever debt she owed Ninjette to be paid, and that the traitor should expect no further help from her. A few days later (in comic time) she shows up to warn 'Jette that the Ayakami clan — all of them — are coming after 'Jette. It's possible that she did this because she enjoys Ninjette's terror. It's also possible that she actually cares. We shall see.
- Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: She was (secretly) gloating over Ninjette's fate in vol. 7 because, whether she won or lost, Ninjette is destined to suffer more. Though if Nine Beers With Ninjette is canon, Ninjette at least already knew this.
- Not So Stoic: Subverted when she proclaims her hatred of Ninjette at the end of Vol. 7, only for it to show that that was what she'd like to say, and her expression stayed frozen.
- Sir Swearsalot: Becomes Sophisticated as Hell.
- The Stoic: In her expressions at least. Adam Warren mentions he accidentally gave her some expression in one scene; he'd intended her to look like a doll.
- Stripperiffic: The Kaburagi clan wear this season - almost nothing. Like Ninjette, averted as a genin.
- Wingding Eyes: Sports star-shuriken-shaped pupils.
Sistah Spooky, AKA Theresa
A demonically-charged sorceress and a senior member of the team. Also a neurotic mess of a woman who continually puts Emp down because she hates and fears blondes. Don't worry, she has a reason.
- Action Girl: More of a long range combatant than Emp, but whatever her other faults, cowardice isn't one of them.
- Alpha Bitch: Spooky's Back Story (and consequent Freudian Excuse) also has her being cruelly tormented by blonde, voluptuous Libbies whilst herself a child, hence the chip on her shoulder regarding Emp.
- An Arm and a Leg: Gets her right arm blasted off by one of the worm creatures in Hell, and it's still gone in volume 9.
- Attention Whore: A more realistic version but she desperately craves the praise of her fellow heroes and the public and works hard maintain her image.
- The Atoner: Sistah Spooky starts showing signs of this in volume 5; she knows she's going to hell so she wants to accomplish some good before then.
- Berserk Button: Don't say anything about her race. Don't be a beautiful blonde girl. And so on.
- Big Ol' Unibrow: Before her Deal with the Devil.
- Bi the Way: May not be the case, Vol 7 heavily implies in her memories that she may have always been a lesbian, as the fling with Thugboy was solely to mess with Emp.
- Black Magician Girl: Ignore the Incredibly Lame Pun.
- Broken Bird: When it comes down to it, Theresa is an incredibly miserable individual who fully understands her misery is partially her fault.
- Combat Stilettos: Goes around in tall platform heels.
- Dark Is Not Evil: Despite her black cloak and general wicked-witch persona, she's a superhero who fights for truth and justice and all that good stuff. A Jerk Ass Smug Super kind of superhero at times, true, but one of the nominal good guys all the same.
- Dark Magical Girl: Older than the other examples, but still fits the trope.
- Deal with the Devil: How she got her powers. In her case, she originally just wished for beauty but got mystical powers because the demon she made a deal with screwed up the paperwork. This is eventually revealed to be a lie, the powers were on purpose on his part.
- Even Evil Has Standards:
- For how much she hates Emp, she wasn't among the ones who nominated her for a Capey Award as a joke, and actually warned her of what was happening.
- Furthered in Volume 8, where we learn that Spooky is actually responsible for Emp's bondage-magnet status as a result of Spooky actively willing it to happen to make sure no-one else distracted from her own star rising as a top superhero, which was also something she'd wished for. The standards come in when, having seen Emp in tears one too many times and uncertain as to how she kept going with such humiliation, Spooky actively tried to stop the spell that had rendered Emp a bondage and humiliation magnet for supervillains. It just didn't work.
- Evil Is Petty: Spooky considers perma-cursing Emp with bondage-magnetism to be her own personal Moral Event Horizon, made worse by the fact that she did it to retain the attention and goodwill of the public. It's... not her proudest moment.
- The Faceless: Initially, we only see her without her mask in flashbacks.
- Goth Girls Know Magic: She's quite gothy, and made a Deal with the Devil to use black magic.
- Heel–Face Turn: Possibly. At the end of volume 5, she seems to have finally accepted that Emp isn't the blonde Alpha Bitch her mind makes her out to be. By vol. 7, Major Havoc has replaced Spooky as her nemesis in the introduction.
- In Universe Nickname: "Spookums", from Mind████.
- Irony: She fears and hates blondes for good reason. She ends up falling in love with one and the one blonde she tries to exact some sort of Revenge by Proxy on turns out to be Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold.
- Lady of Black Magic: She's a bitch and powerful gothy superhero who made a hellpact with a demon to use black magic.
- My God, What Have I Done?: Is responsible for Emp's own misfortunes out of jealousy. Realizing what she did is one part of her massive self-loathing.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: She knew full well that her actions in volume 8 would be the end of her career as a Superhomey, and by volume 9 she officially quits the team.
- Senseless Sacrifice: Tries to pull this, since she's of the firm belief that she deserves to rot in Hell forever. Of course, Emp firmly tells her where she can stick that nonsense.
- Stepford Smiler: Magics herself into one after Mind████ dies. Her Frozen Face goes beyond creepy and into outright tragic.
- Took a Level in Kindness: Come volume 10 she is much kinder to and friendlier with Empowered.
- Vain Sorceress: Inverted, the powers were a bonus.
- You Are Not Alone: Mind████ wanted to invoke this before her death, leaving a small copy of her mind in Spooky's consciousness to mitigate Spooky's worst memories. Afterwards, the timer runs out and it activates. It helps keep her mostly sane and focused.
- You Are What You Hate: Mind████ takes a peek into Spooky's memories and instantly grasps that her public persona has been subconsciously patterned after the same vain blonde bimbos she was so traumatized by. Both physically (sans actual Blondeness) and personality.
Mind████, AKA Hannah
Intensely telepathic super who's been romantically involved with Sistah Spooky in the past. Stays in orbit most of the time to get away from the background thoughtstream.
- *Bleep*-dammit!: Her name actually is rendered as Mind█████.
- Blind Seer: An Invoked example. Her younger brother forced her to remove her own eyes, and most of her tongue, to encourage her to develop her powers.
- Brainwashing for the Greater Good and/or Heel–Face Brainwashing: Does this to herself.
- Did I Just Say That Out Loud??: Talks entirely via telepathy — which means that background thoughts leak out.
- Flat-Earth Atheist: Mindf██k's ex-girlfriend Sistah Spooky got her powers from a Deal with the Devil, and Mindf██k can read her thoughts. But is still agnostic. This becomes tragically ironic because Mindf██k does in fact end up in Hell after she dies.
- Fling a Light into the Future: A left-behind video gives Emp an idea on how to take down a tough bad guy.
- Heroic Self-Deprecation: hers differs from Empowered's in that she sees herself as being an effective hero, she just doesn't feel she's as purely heroic as, for instance, Empowered, given that Empowered is a genuinely good person and Mind████ is not because she had to Mind Rape herself in order to not be a sociopath. Whether or not a willingness to Mind Rape yourself is proof of inherent goodness is a matter up for discussion.
- Mind Rape: one possible use of her powers. Her backstory reveals that she constantly did this to herself to avoid becoming a sociopath like her brother.
- Morality Pet: To Spooky. Post-mortum, she becomes the Morality Chain for Emp and Spooky's not-quite-friendship.
- Noble Demon: As detailed above, this is Mind████'s opinion of herself at worst.
- People Puppets: Used both by her and on her..
- Power Perversion Potential: "Mindfriends with benefits". Ask for it by name! Their entire relationship was conducted 'long-distance' with one or two exceptions, since Mind████ is really bad at real sex (lacking most of tongue didn't help).
- Realistic Diction Is Unrealistic: An odd variant in her telepathy, which appears to be based on stream-of-consciousness thought. She constantly corrects herself midsentence, adds random adjectives and adverbs, and goes off on smaller tangents before moving on to the next topic.
- Sacrificial Lion: She's nice to Emp and even Spooky likes her? Of course she's going to DIE!!
- Samus Is a Girl: Until the end of volume 4, we see Mind████ only in a spacesuit, complete with helmet.
- Telepathy: Her power.
A super-strong, none-too-bright Jerk Jock. That's about it for his character. Because of this, we can cheer when he gets his just desserts.
- A Father to His Men: He truly cares for his teammates, just not Emp. His description of trying to save Turbobrain from Willy Pete's fire is quite sad.
- Asshole Victim: To the Chloroformaster. And arguably to Willy Pete.
- Bathroom Stall of Overheard Insults: Spreads some nasty rumors/smears to Heronet about Emp.
- Battle Cry: "'SCUSE ME WHILE I CRY HAVOC!!!"
- Book Dumb: Another superhero states that he dropped out after third grade. He may have been joking, but still...
- Break the Haughty:In Vol 7 while he's his normal asshole self he's also absolutely terrified of another encounter with Willy Pete.
- Butt-Monkey: His stupidity, smugness, and Jerk Jock nature makes him an easy target for this.
- Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: While he's definitely no genius and the degree to which he took Willy Pete lightly bordered on Too Dumb to Live, he's a professional super all right- just look at how he commanded his team when they were preparing to ambush Willy Pete (at least before it all went to hell).
- Flat Character: He's a macho Flying Brick who hates Emp. So far, that's all we know.
- Gilligan Cut: He tries to give a rousing speech when the supers are temporarily depowered, saying, "We're still heroes, aren't we?". Cut to him screaming, "Aaaagh! Get it off me!"
- Godzilla Threshold: Seems to think the fight with Willy Pete qualifies to bring out the big guns. All the other Homeys shut him down pretty quickly, though.
- Jerkass: In the volume seven recap, he's taken over from Spooky as Emp's no. 1 asshole teammate.
- Jerkass Has a Point: While he goes out of his way to find reasons to doubt Emp's claims of victory, even Emp's allies begrudgingly admit that his arguments aren't totally wrong.
- Nigh Invulnerable: Willy Pete's fire, which has the heat of a nuke, just knocked him out and destroyed his shirt.
- Smug Super: He's definitely the smuggest of the bunch.
- Took a Level in Jerkass: Book Six is when he turns from an asshole on the same level as the other homies to being actively antagonistic towards Emp.
- Unskilled, but Strong: According to Ninjette, he has the fighting skills of a "developmentally disabled third grader."
- The Worf Effect: Have we seen any battles where he didn't get the ████ kicked out of him? Even Ninjette defeats him once (though in his defense, he was at least somewhat drunk at the time).
The leader of the team. Made entirely of metal. Surprisingly, not a jerkass (he has the decency to at least try to suppress his laughter at Emp's humiliation).
- The Cape: In a world full of superheroes that range from idly idiotic to actively assholish, Capitan Rivet stands out as a (mostly) genuinely nice guy and heroic figure. This may be why Emp idolizes him to the point of wearing underwear with his logo on it.
- Chrome Champion: Is a stainless steel golem, and was never human to start with.
- Not So Above It All: Played with in the "Soldier of Love" story; he is the only hero to not get caught up in the shipping obsession surrounding superheroes/villains. However, the ending heavily implies that he was the one who hired the Soldier of Love to launch her attack, precisely in order to discredit the shipping obsession and let them focus on actually being superheroes. The fact that he lost control of her and only narrowly avoided a horrific outcome (which anybody who isn't completely Genre Blind could have predicted would happen when you hire a supervillain,) shows that he is certainly not above making stupid, genre-blind decisions in his efforts to be above some of the other pitfalls heroes are subject to. He also found Emp's humiliation funny, but he did hold his laughter in.
- Reasonable Authority Figure: For the Superhomeys. He's one of the few members of the team who treats Emp like a teammate and not a joke. More importantly, in Book 9, he's the only person who votes against putting Emp in cryofreeze to keep her knowledge about alien tech from falling into villain hands, and in Book 10, he argues in favor of Emp becoming a full-fledged member.
- The Worf Effect: Have we seen any battles where he didn't get the ████ kicked out of him?
A man with a cinderblock for a head. One of the few truly sympathetic heroes, he gives Emp some fatherly advice and compliments in his first appearance.
- Be Careful What You Wish For: Sometimes when a teacher asks you to imagine yourself as a superbeing, he might grant your wish. So make sure you make up a character with hands, or a face.
- Destructive Savior: He tries to avoid using his powers as much as possible because his powers are massive property damage.
- Let's Get Dangerous!: When he DOES get serious though, he's quite possibly one of the most powerful supers in the series.
- Dishing Out Dirt: More specifically: concrete, pavement, and masonry.
- Half-Human Hybrid: Half-man, half-... concrete?
- Mundane Utility: Uses his powers to rebuild the Superhomeys' base whenever it gets trashed. He has had to do this six times.
- Nice Guy: Is very supportive of Empowered and offers her plenty of advice.
- Story-Breaker Power: Theoretically, he could just drop a bridge on someone and be done with it. Probably why he's so nice.
Has had only one appearance, where it was commented that he is gay.
A human who got infected with an alien STD and turned into a blob. Wants you to know that his name means "ever-changing" and stuff.
- Blob Monster: He is one, having been transformed after contracting an alien STD after Boldly Coming.
- Boldly Coming: His background story. Apparently gaining powers from alien/robot STDs are relatively common.
- Cursed with Awesome: To some extent.
- Insistent Terminology: Protean, not Protein. No, it's not "Glorpp" either.
- Those Two Guys: With Havok
Phallik, AKA Bob
Wields his mighty Phallospear; has a fondness for smacking Emp's arse (or 'male-bonding' as he calls it) with it. Dies in the fight with Willy Pete, and as a representative for the Superdead, exposes the deads' locations to Deathmonger.
- Does This Remind You of Anything?: Read: phallo-spear. It even goes limp when his powers wear off.
- Deal with the Devil: How he got his Phallospear.
- Dirty Old Man: Cant seem to keep his, ahem, "phallik" to himself.
- The Loins Sleep Tonight: In a case of Does This Remind You of Anything?, when his powers are temporarily deactivated, his phallospear goes limp.
Divangelic AKA Vanity & Charity, AKA Courtney
A pair of Conjoined Twins; the twin on the right is Vanity, a devil, wielding a whip; on the left, we have Charity, an angel wielding a kind of morningstar. The mind boggles how they manage to live with each other. Actually a single girl who was split into two people by some kind of unknown 3rd party masquerading as her teacher. Dies in the fight with Willy Pete.
- Angelic Beauty: Charity is dressed as an agel and is quite attractive.
- Be Careful What You Wish For: Sometimes when a teacher asks you to imagine yourself as a superbeing, he might grant your wish.
- Carry a Big Stick: Charity's weapon.
- Hot as Hell: Vanity is dressed as a devil and is quite attractive.
- Literal Split Personality: Courtney explained her first drawing of Divangelic as representing her "good girl and bad girl sides as separate but connected entities". After the transformation, Vanity and Charity live up to the concept.
- Whip It Good: Vanity's weapon.
Once a normal man, he was infected with a lady-bot's nanotech STD after sleeping with her, and turned into a mecha. Still acts as much like a human as possible, to the extent of sleeping.
- A Day in the Limelight: Emp has to team up with him in the full color one-shot Hellbent or Heavensent.
- Meaningful Name: Is very chauvinistic. And a machine.
- My Hovercraft Is Full of Eels: He was transformed via alien nanotech, and as such all the options in his cyberware interace are in the same incomprehensible alien language and alphabet, though it's fairly intuitive regardless. His tendency to just click through all the options nearly leads to a Grey Goo scenario.
A Batman (or Robin?) expy who seems to be the most decent, well-adjusted hero so far. The full French maid dress, stiletto heels and fishnets (with garters) he always wears could be thought of as an endearing character trait. He's introduced to us as a reverse mole.
- Agent Peacock: He stands out even among the other superheroes with their costumes.
- Atrocious Alias: While he more than makes up for it in skill and intimidation, even Maidman admits that a French maid is a fairly ridiculous persona to use, but brushes it off by suggesting it's a deliberate ploy to confuse criminals (or possibly just an inordinate fondness for women's underwear).
- Badass Normal: Maidman has no powers. He relies on intimidation, martial arts and a few gadgets to get the job done. Judging from his status as The Dreaded he's probably the most effective hero in the city.
- Combat Pragmatist: As he assures Empowered, when she uses Look Behind You to fake out a bunch of criminals, despite his commitment to cleanliness, he sees no problem with fighting dirty.
- Curb-Stomp Battle: Takes down Blitzcraig on national television with a vegetable dumpling that has some of Wet Blanket's power-draining essence (with Blitzcraig depowered, Maidman unleashes a martial-arts sequence that causes others to retract their snark at Maidman once he wins).
- The Dreaded: Supervillains are so terrified of him that merely mentioning his name will have them turn in horror (conveniently exposing their back to Emp, who called him out just for this). A magazine once did a survey among supervillains and he was voted as the guy they'd least like to arch-antagonize.
- Fan Disservice: Part of why he's The Dreaded: he wears lace panties under his skirt, and uses no Magic Skirt.
- Made of Iron: Rattles off a ridiculous amount of injuries during a self-diagnosis, and proceeds to shrug it off like he was speaking of a stubbed toe.
- Nice Guy: To Emp, being on the few people in the hero community to treat her with any respect, and even stand up for her and give her props for saving the day when the rest would rather cover it up in order to save face.
- Ninja Maid: Sort of.
- Real Men Wear Pink: He wields an explosive broom, throws doily shuriken, fights in stiletto heels with little bows on them and villains are terrified of him. The only male meido as badass is Kogarashi.
- Split Personality: Apparently, his civilian identity, while aware of his alter ego's exploits as Maidman, does not approve of them. Or know how to get bloodstains out of clothing.
- Stealth Pun: Based on how he acts and dresses, Maidman's secret identity appears to be a Made Man.
- Superhero Sobriquets: The Garter-belted Gladiator, the Dark Knight Domestic, the Delicate Cycle Detective, the Hard-hitting Hygenist, the Sanitary Sentinel, the Iron-handed Immaculist, the Manservant of Steel, the Squeaky-clean Samurai, the Corset-clad Crusader and the Velveteen Virtuoso of Violence.
- Wholesome Crossdresser: Maidman dresses in a classic French maid's outfit, complete with too short skirt that leads to lots of panty flashing, and he is probably the nicest hero Emp meets.
A former kidnapper of Emp who saw the interest in the market for a Stripperiffic heroine that was constantly getting Bound and Gagged, then used it to great financial effect to become a softcore idol.
- Bi the Way: Flirts with Emp, Major Havoc, and others.
- Cat Girl: "Nyaan!"
- Everyone Has Standards: "Inappropriate, I'm not into breathplay note , jackass."
- Exact Words: Empowered is gagged from talking about what happened at the superhero awards (other members of the Superhomeys aren't and start spreading nasty rumors about her), so Ocelotina invites her on her show and duct tapes her head so she can't talk so that Ocelotina can say how awesome Emp was.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: She respects Emp and considers her a true hero. Is it sad that, even though she has humiliated Empowered in public and over the internet that she is legitimately magnitudes nicer to our heroine than anyone on Empowered's team?
- The Load: "Please save me... because I'm really, really cute!".
- Ms. Fanservice: This is all she is.
- Your Approval Fills Me with Shame: She's very open to Emp that Emp's popularity as a bondage magnet was her inspiration to become a hero. Emp is never pleased at this.
Small, cute and wide-eyed superpresenter of "Superdirty Jobs".
- Little Miss Badass: Able to tangle with all kinds of aliens, demons, and anything else the superhero life can throw at her, due to her invulnerability. Her show is about showing off the absolute toughest superhero jobs, and she shrugs it all off with a smile.
- Nigh Invulnerable: She looks like a vulnerable little girl next to the beefy superdudes who work the jobs. But shrugs off fresh lava to the face.
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: She's based on Mike Rowe, the host of Dirty Jobs.
A superhero who also works as a ghost writer. He writes most of the celebrity books released by various superheroes.
- A Darker Me: Mightier Pen, his character in his Self Insert Fics (and when he is moonlighting as a villain).
- Author Appeal: in-universe example - he's really into spanking, bondage and Distressed Damsels.
- Blatant Lies: Very poorly tries to cover up that not only does he have a huge fetish for spanking, he's also the fanfic author behind several poorly written fanfics about Emp.
- Jerk Ass: His "book proposal" for Emp's book deal was little more than a fetish softcore book about her being tied up and spanked. When she called him on it, he insulted her and said that all she ever would be was a sexy joke so she might as well embrace it and try to profit off it.
- Mad Libs Catchphrase: "A [noun] — no, a [adjective] [same noun]" and "[verb] — no, [different verb]"
- Mills and Boon Prose/Stylistic Suck: His writing is full of this, with special attention being paid to his frequent use of the word "nubilely."
- Unusual Euphemism: "humidly enflamed", which is what clues Emp in on him also being the author of an erotic fanfic about herself she found earlier.
A man who was turned into a fire elemental, and consequently gained the appetite of fire — i.e., insatiable. At least, he's presumed to have once been a man; there are quite a few question marks concerning Willy Pete's origin. He was the Witless Minions' (and thus Thugboy's) last employer until Thugboy goes back to Witless Minioning in volume 10, which is how he makes money, so they've got some history between them; it's the kind of history that usually starts with "The rivers ran red with blood..."
- Anything That Moves: "Ol' Willy Pete can do animal... in fact, I'm kinda known for it."
- Art Evolution: Sometime in between his first and second appearance, Warren apparently got much better at drawing fire.
- Artificial Human: According to Mind████, he doesn't even have a true mind.
- Atrocious Alias: Yeah, Willy Pete is a nickname for white phosphorous, but why not call himself White Phosphorous then? Willy Pete is still a pretty dumb name.
- Beard of Evil: Sports a long fiery beard.
- Blessed with Suck: Though he doesn't think so, a drawback of being a "fire elemental" is that he takes on the same properties as fire. In other words, he's insatiable for more things to consume, even though he doesn't actually need to. He's perpetually horny and hungry, but can't eat or have sex normally.
- Depraved Bisexual: He rapes people to death while burning thousands of degree Celsius hot. His victims' gender doesn't actually matter — anyone unlucky enough to get caught is fair game. Oh, and he prefers to rape them through the eye socket because the skull is one of the few parts of the body that isn't incinerated too quickly.
- Evil Is Burning Hot: Made of fire; possibly the most evil character in the comic.
- Eye Scream: His signature. He likes to skull-fuck people to death.
- From Nobody to Nightmare: Played with—he was always powerful, but simply not known.
- Full-Frontal Assault: He is nude under all the flames.
- Hero Killer: Wipes out a significant number of Superhomies with terrifyingly little effort, finally (and unintentionally) catching the attention of the Super-community.
- I'm a Humanitarian: Pete eats the flesh of people sturdy enough not to be instantly reduced to cinders by his touch, despite not needing food to survive.
- Implacable Man: That's what ultimately triggered Thugboy's "whatever" mode: he is only alive because Willy Pete hasn't found him yet.
- Knight of Cerebus: His first confrontation with superheroes finishes with a great deal of them dead despite the pretty upbeat tone of the comics.
- Meaningful Name: "Willy Pete" is (US) military jargon for White Phosphorus.
- Nonstandard Character Design: The only (non-robot) character that doesn't look even slightly Animesque.
- Playing with Fire: He is constantly burning thousands of degrees Celsius hot.
- Power Incontinence: Willy Pete cannot turn off his flames, supposedly leading him to the depraved acts he's known for, since he can't have normal sex nor have a normal meal. It's implied that he doesn't have a normal body under the flames—and might not even be human at all.
- Shout-Out: Very reminiscent of a Star Man villain named "Dr Phosphorous". They have the same power-set, the same Power Incontinence and the same general personality, though Phosphorous lacks Willy Pete's degenerate rapist streak.
- Tom the Dark Lord: Seems this way until the Meaningful Name is pointed out.
A former member of the Superhomies, until he was publicly humiliated (Carrie-style) at an awards ceremony, then disappeared.
- Chekhov's Gunman: Both played straight (to a degree) and subverted; Fleshmaster is mentioned several times during Volume Four as part of the Capeys' debacle that could prove to be Emp's eventual fate if she wins anything - since it's a proven fact (and alarmingly, Sistah Spooky seems aware of this) that the suprahuman community is a bunch of dicks - but we never meet him. Turns out he was under their nose all along as dWARf, which is revealed in a stellar scene mentioned below. Ironically, dWARf sets himself up to be found out by Emp.
- Clipped-Wing Angel: In his fight with Emp he uses his bio-editing powers to become a monstrous giant...which doesn't even get one hit in before Emp pounds him into the floor.
- Curb-Stomp Battle: Emp defeats him very quickly. She does not even let him take advantage of his powers.
- Kick the Dog:
- He promised to spare Emp's friends if she gave him a blowjob at his moment of triumph. Emp didn't take kindly to that.
- And then there's what he did to poor Manny...
- Killed Off for Real: Vaporized on panel, courtesy of a lotus node portal, an alien superweapon and a very pissed off Emp.
- Not So Different: Tries to pull this on Emp, pointing out how horrifically their superpeers have bullied and disrespected them. Lets say he underestimated Emp's legitimate herosim.
- Pintsized Powerhouse: As dWARf!
A Littlest Cancer Patient who met Emp thanks to the Grant-A-Wish Foundation in order to tie her up. His greatest dream was to become a supervillain. Through a strange series of events he managed to attain superhuman intelligence and (possibly) cure himself.
- Affably Evil: To an extreme degree. The mad respect he has for Emp makes for a jarring contrast with the disrespect her own teammates show her.
- Death of Personality: Fleshmaster causes his Mayfly-mutated brain matter to expand out of control that his consciousness falls into an inescapable feedback loop, an essential brain-death.
- Face Heel Door Slam: His ultimate fate, thanks to Fleshmaster.
- Friendly Enemy: He's indebted to Emp and worships her because he could finally play "Ropehappy Supervillain" with her.
- Kid-anova: Manny has a bit of this. See Precocious Crush.
- Littlest Cancer Patient: Played with, in that he legitimately has cancer and is quite precocious, but willingly subjects himself to worse via Mayfly to cure his original cancer, and is only tangentially killed by his disease courtesey of Fleshmaster.
- Mecha-Mooks: Last seen with an army of robot henchmen... that he named after Emp.
- Precocious Crush: On Emp. He grows out of it.
DeathmongerA necromancer-style supervillain who preys upon vulnerable supers no one wants to admit exist.
- An Arm and a Leg: Loses her left arm and and left leg and gets her right leg gruesomely mangled during her fight with Emp. She appears to be have them back in volume 9, either through prosthetic replacements or some other unexplained means.
- And I Must Scream: The fate of any SuperDead she captures.
- Demonic Possession: is used as a mouthpiece by the devil that accidentally gave Sistah Spooky her powers. After the conversation ends, Deathmonger regains control and notes that she "lost a few minutes."
- The Dreaded: Scares the shit out of every cape when they see her, for very good reason. Especially those knowledgeable about the SuperDead.
- Due to the Dead: Ha, no.
- Even Evil Has Standards: Enacts a temporary truce with Emp in Vol. 9, because she's THAT fond of Manny, and likely realized she was the only way to bring the poor boy to peace at last.
- Evil Genius: Was a superscience savant before becoming a criminal. And before she died.
- Foreshadowing: Warned by Manny himself, to not take Emp lightly.
- The Ghost: Deathmonger was mentioned in the very first story of volume 1 as the villain the Superhomies were arguing over how to defeat. Later in that volume Deathmonger was described as "a popular sell out supervillain" and an "overhyped jackass" by a disgruntled Big Iron. She was the central villain of the chapter 'Diseased Wench' with an army of "scythebots", but since Emp never made it to the battle, nothing of her was seen. After volume 1 she dropped out of the series until volume 6—where she finally appeared after having been reimagined as The Dreaded that she was. Even then, her mask still left her as The Faceless.
- Hero Killer: Has personally offed several well-known capes in order to see if they'd be SuperDead candidates.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Several:
- Emp lassos her with a Super tongue she severed, causing Ubiquitease, a SuperDead she enslaved, to leave without her at just the right moment.
- She sets Tommy Tokamak's carcass, which is powering her facility, to detonate her Collapsing Lair... And it does, with her inside thanks to Emp... although it appears that teleport sparkles are appearing around her before the explosion. Sure enough, come volume 9...
- Necromancer: Dresses the part to the T. And while she isn't the one to bring them back she has the tech to turn any SuperDead into her personal puppet soldiers.
- Night of the Living Mooks: Literally. The SuperDead, as a result of their abilities, are aware and helpless to do her bidding.
- Retcon: From her early mentions in volume 1, nothing about Deathmonger suggested that she was anything other than a death-themed supervillain commanding an army of "scythebots", although in the first chapter Emp mentioned her drawing power from a "pan-dimensional link" which she suggested the Superhomies try to cut off. When she reappeared in volume 6, she was reimagined as an actual Necromancer who commands armies of the superdead. This could be purposeful on her part as the cover story on the subject benefits her activities, but the apparent difference was never addressed. However, in volume 6, a bunch of robots with scythe limbs are also seen around the lair, so this may not be as big a retcon as we think.
- Samus Is a Girl: Revealed to be female in volume 9.
- Skeletons in the Coat Closet: She wears the skull of the superhero Impakt as a mask, although unusually for the trope her eyes don't go in the sockets.
- Unexplained Recovery: We never do find out how she survived that explosion.
- Villain Respect: Came to seriously respect Emp after their first encounter.
This so-far-unnamed ninja is the leader of Ninjette's ninja clan, the source of her issues and a complete bastard.
- Abusive Dad: Volume 7 reveals just how horrible he is.
- Action Dad: He's Ninjette's father and kicks lots of ass.
- The Alcoholic: It runs in the family.
- Archnemesis Dad: To Ninjette.
- Ax-Crazy: Sometimes there's just no excuse other than this.
- Disproportionate Retribution: I mean, full scale war with an allied clan over your kid chucking her virginity at one of their princes? Yes, it wrecked a potential alliance marriage with a third party (the clan head in question insisted on a virgin teenage bride) but now you're further in the hole.
- The Faceless: We only ever see his body, his facial profile with his hair obscuring his eyes, or his hand either holding a beer or reaching for Ninjette...
- Humans Are the Real Monsters: Only a human, but is one of the most vile characters in the series.
- In Vino Veritas: The same technique of Ninjette. Justified because it's a Clan Kaburagi technique. Also, his fifth beer of the night makes his real abusive personality emerge.
- Terms of Endangerment: Refers to Ninjette by her first name with the "chan" honorific attached, which tends to make whatever he's doing while calling her this even creepier...
- Villainous Valor: In an interesting way. In preparation for her final battle with the Ayakami, Ninjette drinks, explaining that she won't walk "into a scenario likely to result in [her] death and/or dismemberment without first getting good and solidly buzzed...." Oyuki responds that Ninjette's father often says something very similar before going into battle. It reminds us that, evil though he be, Ninjette's father is still a man, who feels fear, and possibly other human feelings. That one moment renders him easily the most human of the villains in the comic (save, of course, for Manny).
Infernal Service Provider
Infernal Service Provider
The demon Sistah Spooky sold her soul to for supernatural hotness, and due to a misplaced decimal point, was granted massive magical power as well. The ISP tried to correct the error quietly, but Spooky's hero actions made this impossible, and his superiors caught wind of the monumental mixup. He has no intention whatsoever of letting Spooky off the hook for this.
- Batman Gambit:
- Granted Spooky and several others too much power on purpose, so he could eventually force one into taking his place. Only Spooky took the bait.
- He also claims to have had some sort of involvement in Mind███'s death somehow.
- Ironic Hell: His existence is one. A salesman who hated his job when alive, a salesman who hates his job while dead.
- Faux Affably Evil: Calls Sistah Spooky "Sunshine", and claims to be moved to proverbial tears over her reuniting with Mind███, but it's painfully obvious he doesn't have a sincere bone in his body.
- Taking You with Me: When Sistah Spooky gives him the complete thrashing he deserves, he calls for Hell Security to kill them all.
- Villains Never Lie: Played with. He lied about the transaction mishap being a mishap, and seemingly lied about Mind███ being in Hell. But the latter was unfortunately very very true.
Mind████'s BrotherMind████'s younger brother, who forced her to cut out her own eyes and tongue to force her to rely on her telepathy more, thus making her stronger.
- Be Careful What You Wish For: According to Mind████, he was overcome by fear and confusion thanks to constantly reading the ickier thoughts of everyone around him, and altered his own personality so that he'd never fear anything again. This, unfortunately, turned him into a complete sociopath.
- Chekhov M.I.A.: So far, has appeared on-panel only in a Flashback Nightmare, but he casts enough of a shadow over the series that he's pretty certain to appear at some point. Volume 10 ends with a cliffhanger, because he's back.
- His Cryopod briefly appears in Volume 10, but we don't get to see inside it. We do, however, get to see his supranyms as both hero and villain: Brainbow and Neurospear.
- Human Popsicle: Currently he's kept in a cryofreeze prison until the end of Book 10.
- People Puppets: Used this power to force his sister to cut out her own tongue and eyes and mindcontrol Thugboy into knocking Emp off of a building.
Wet BlanketA wimpy villain with a potentially devastating power: he can negate other supers' abilities.
- Anti-Villain: Quite possibly the most soft-hearted criminal ever. One wonders how he ended up as a villain.
- Personality Powers: He's a wet blanket both power-wise and socially.
- Political Correctness Gone Mad: Goes with his Personality Powers.
- Politically Correct Villain: His defining trait.
- Power Incontinence: His nullification power is always on.
- Power Nullifier: Cancels out all powers within 25 feet of him. Any cells separated from his body retain this power.
- Uncertain Doom: It's never made clear if he survived Fleshmaster's mutilations.
- Verbal Tic: "'kay?"
El Soldado Del Amor
El Soldado Del AmorA jaded spanish magical girl turned mercenary. Her powers allows her to manipulate the love in people and wants to rid the world of love.
- Love Freak: Deconstructed. At first she believed in love and started making people fall in love with her. Unfortunately, all it does is to make them little more than slave robots enthralled only with love. And she's immune to her own powers so she can't accept her own lies, and can see said love as a huge growth of flesh in people.
- Magical Girl Warrior: Her uniform even looks like a soldier uniform.
- Mentor Mascot: A pangolin.
- Power of Love: She has the ability to manipulate the love of others, amplifying it to levels that prevents them from doing anything else. Ironically, she sees love as a disease and wants to remove it from the world.
- Universal Translator: When she's in magical girl form, she speaks the Universal language of Love.
BlitzcraigA former enemy of Maidman who went by the name of Gotterdammeruffian. He changed his identity and became a talk show host.
- Catch-Phrase: He likes to add "super" to random words.Interesting. No, super-interesting.
- Faux Affably Evil: He pretends to be a charming talk show host, but he's actually a villain.
- Flying Brick: He can fly, has the strength of fifty men and is Nigh Invulnerable.
- Gratuitous German: Both his names are puns off of German words. It was what tipped Maidman off to his true identity in the first place.
- Underestimating Badassery: He makes the mistake of believing that he can beat Maidman. He learns the hard way that he can not.