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Bond One-Liner
aka: Post Mortem One Liner

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It's supposed to be a ten-gallon hat, but it appears to have sprung a leak.
Starsky: Looks like you just punched your last ticket, amigo.
Hutch: I'm sorry, did you just tough-talk a dead body?

Oftentimes, when the hero (or in some cases the villain) has just killed someone, often in a gruesome manner, they do a Bond One-Liner.

The classic Bond One-Liner is typically a bad Pun or Obligatory Joke on the manner in which the victim was dispatched. It can be a snarky response to the now-dead enemy's attempted Pre-Mortem One-Liner, an Ironic Echo of something they said to the hero earlier, or a casual response set up by having the hero interact with a character who wonders aloud why the victim is not present. It often works on the basis that it Crosses the Line Twice, but it may also be a sign that the character who says it has sociopathic tendencies.

Note that while William Peterson's one liners on CSI, David Caruso's one liners on the Miami sister show and Jerry Orbach's on Law & Order are often similar in content, they fail the test for this trope, as Grissom and Briscoe were never the killers, only snarkers. In general, see Quip to Black for cheesy one-liners right before a cut.

If the one-liner is said before killing, or if the killing blow is struck but the one-liner is said before the victim's consciousness fades, it's a Pre-Mortem One-Liner (which, for the record, James Bond says just as often). It's also possible to combine the two, with separate quips before and after killing the victim. If the character is making smartass quips about their own impending death, then it's a Gallows Humor version of a "Facing the Bullets" One-Liner.

The Trope Namer is James Bond, who does this in every single one of his films. (The early films were done under the onus of The Hays Code, with these quips being used to downplay the violence; later films simply carried on the tradition.) Ditto Arnold Schwarzenegger, but Bond's have more pun.

As this is a Death Trope, unmarked spoilers abound. Beware.


Example Subpages:

Other Examples:

    open/close all folders 
    Animation 
  • In the Simple Samosa episode "Sumo Momo", Samosa is in a wrestling match with Sumo Momo and goes through 93 rounds of being clobbered before he finally gets an injury - the tip on his head cracks, which makes him furious and causes him to beat him up like nobody's business. After he does this, he delivers the following line:
    Samosa: Hey, I'll give you one tip. Never mess with my tip, okay?

    Anime & Manga 
  • Dragon Ball:
    • In Dragon Ball, towards the end of the Red Ribbon Army arc, Adjutant Black is not pleased when he finds out that his boss Commander Red is gathering the Dragon Balls to make himself taller, instead of to Take Over the World. After blowing his brains out, Black says "You don't deserve to be the Commander."
    • Krillin himself gets a hilarious one when he defeats Chiaotzu in the World Martial Arts Tournament. At first, the latter's telekinesis has Krillin on the receiving end of a borderline Curb-Stomp Battle, but Krillin breaks his concentration by asking him basic math questions, including "What's 9 - 1?" After Chiaotzu lost, Krillin coolly says, "the answer is 8!"
    • In the first English dub of Dragon Ball Z, Frieza, on surviving the Spirit Bomb, kills Krillin by making him explode before snidely commenting, "Pop goes the weasel."
  • One Piece has its fair share.
    • Zoro gives one to Kaku after No Selling his ultimate attack with his Asura technique and then defeating him that also doubles as a Brick Joke.
      Zoro: I have a message from that other Galley-La Leader... You're fired.
    • One notable one after Sanji savagely defeats Jabra with his new Diable Jambe technique goes something like this, depending on the translation:
      Sanji: Food is a gift from God. Spices are a gift from the devil. I guess it was a little too spicy for you.
    • The Funimation dub changes it to include Oda's It Runs on Nonsensoleum explanation for how the technique failed to harm Sanji, since he ignites his leg to use it:
      Sanji: God may have created food, but the devil created spices. If you think that kick was hot, my heart was burning even hotter.
    • Usopp manages this in the Thriller Bark arc. One of the Co-Dragons, Gothic Lolita Perona, has a Devil Fruit that let her create ghosts, which hollow out the spirit of anyone they pass through. That is, they sink the victims into depression. Usopp's pessimism makes him immune to that technique, which has never failed to disable an opponent. Then, after a chase, she fools Usopp into thinking that she is invincible by displaying flight, intangibility, and size alteration. Usopp catches on that it is just another astral projection, and upon finding her real body, uses his own lying skills to scare her into unconsciousness using only glue, toy cockroaches, and a balloon. Then we have this:
      Usopp: Talk about a stupid move. NOBODY CHALLENGES USOPP IN THE ART OF NEGATIVITY AND LYING AND WINS!
      [Perona, already unconscious, collapses]
    • Sanji does this to another Co-Dragon in the Thriller Bark arc, Absalom, who had been attempting to make Nami his bride (against her will, but she was unconscious during Sanji's fight). He pummels him with a massive salvo of kicks, slamming him into the wall and leaving an imprint, before putting a cigarette in his mouth and saying:
      Sanji: You wanted to get married? I now pronounce you man and wall.
    • Brook is no slouch, either... though in contrast with how badass his You Are Already Dead swordplay is beforehand, his Bond One-Liners are a little too silly. From after he takes down an army of mutated soldier ants who had neglected him because he didn't have any meat on his bones (being a living skeleton) in Strong World, we have a line that roughly translates to:
      Brook: Yes, I am nothing but bones, but that's only because I wanted... to drop a few pounds.
    • In the Fishman Island arc, after finishing the eight-sword-wielding octopus merman Hyouzou (who Zoro had been mocking as a frog, much to Hyouzou's fury):
      Zoro: My mistake, maybe you're not a frog after all. But you did croak.
    • Another Brook example from the Dressrosa arc. He's facing Giolla, a demented woman whose Devil Fruit lets her turn anything into abstract art, and she's imprisoned Nami, Chopper, and a new ally of theirs named Momonosuke in a sculpture that will kill them in ten minutes' time. Brook only rejoices, claiming to see the beauty in her art, and volunteers to do a song for the occasion. Giolla eagerly reverses her power over his violin and bow…but it turns out his bow was his cane, which was his sword. One You Are Already Dead later, he sheathes his sword, Giolla falls unconscious, and her powers are reversed. Brook's reaction? Roughly translates to...
      Brook: My apologies, but I don't think I "see" the point in art after all! Because I... don't have any eyes!
  • In Overlord (2012), Ainz murders Clementine in Revenge by crushing them to death in a Killer Bear Hug, despite earlier claiming it would be hypocritical of him to be upset with Celemtine for the situation.
    Ainz: I forgot to tell you. I am very hypocritical.
  • In YuYu Hakusho, Kurama defeats Roto by secretly planting a Death Plant seed in his chest. The plant sucks up Roto's body fluids and then sprouts from his corpse. Kuruma remarks, "What irony. Such beauty, sprung from such an ugly soil."
  • In Speed Grapher, Tatsumi tapes up and gags Kagura's teacher, Ms. Wakaba, in order to take her place. When asked what happened to Ms. Wakaba, he replies "She got a bit tied up".
  • In Fairy Tail, Natsu shouts "Checkmate!" after taking down the king of Edolas. His friends inform him he's supposed to say it before capturing the king in chess.
  • In Bleach, Mask de Masculine calls himself "The Superstar", has star-themed attacks, and boasts that a Superstar can never die. Renji reduces him to a pile of ash and comments on how the Superstar finally burned out.
  • In Megaman NT Warrior, during a battling tournament, Chaud is in a double-battle against an annoying teen who is constantly bragging about his Netnavi's "awesome moves". Once the battle begins, ProtoMan defeats not only the annoying teen's Netnavi, but also the Netnavis of their respective battling partners in one hit.
  • In Hyperdimension Neptunia the Animation, White Heart has one after defeating Trick in Episode 2:
    White Heart: Don't pick a fight with a goddess, it's never gonna end well.
  • Yu-Gi-Oh! GX: The English dub had Edo/Aster Phoenix say, "You can't hide from destiny." whenever he beats someone in a duel. The Japanese version usually had him insult them instead.
  • In the English dub of Yu-Gi-Oh! The Movie: Pyramid of Light, Kaiba duels Pegasus, who uses a Toon deck. When Kaiba wins, he quips, "That's all, folks."
  • In the Optimum English dub of Sailor Moon S movie, after Sailor Venus lops both arms off of a Mook courtesy of a Love-Me Chain, she quips, "Well, she's no Venus de Milo!"
  • JoJo's Bizarre Adventure:
    • Jotaro has a bad afternoon with Steely Dan in Stardust Crusaders due to the latter holding Joseph hostage with his Stand, Lovers. Jotaro keeps a list of the insulting things Dan makes Jotaro do...because as soon as Lovers is neutralized, he and his stand Star Platinum relish in some Extreme Mêlée Revenge. Afterwards, he signs the note and snarks, "Your receipt. You can keep the freaking change."
    • After DIO is finally killed by Jotaro, he doesn’t hesitate to stand over his corpse with a sassy line.
      Jotaro: There was only one reason why you lost, DIO. One very simple reason. You really pissed me off.
    • After blowing up Shigechi, Yoshikage Kira quietly but proudly gloats about Killer Queen's capabilities with this gem:
      Kira: Behold the genius of my Killer Queen. All evidence to my true self has been destroyed.
    • JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Golden Wind:
      • Bruno Bucciarati's Stand Cry finishes like this after he defeats Pesci:
        Sticky Fingers: ARIARIARIARIARIARIARIARIARIARI! ARI!!
        Bruno: Arrivederci.note 
      • Giorno gets one after he tricks Baby Face, Jr. into merging with a motorcycle and causing it to explode.
        Giorno: Guess doing things as you pleased didn't really work out for you. Here's my way.
      • Narancia's Stand Cry while Aerosmith is shooting the hell out of Squalo ends thusly:
        Narancia: VOLAVOLAVOLAVOLA! VOLA! Volare via.note 
      • After dropping the enemy Stand, Notorious B.I.G., into the ocean, Trish borrows Bruno's "Arrivederci" Bond One-Liner.
      • The Boss drops a smooth line after offing Abbacchio in a grisly manner. From the dub:
        The Boss: There's just no place like home. I'm on a roll.
  • In the English language dub of Digimon Adventure, after MetalSeadramon believed he had killed the DigiDestined by burning down the beach hut they had been hiding in, he remarks:
    Farewell, DigiDestined! It was a rare pleasure knowing you — medium rare!
    • Digimon: The Movie (also dub) has one right after Omnimon slices through Diaboromon's head, putting a stop the virus' takeover of the internet and attempt to launch nuclear missiles.
    Omnimon: Connection... terminated.

    Audio Plays 
  • In the third Season Finale of We're Alive, Burt lures a behemoth into a pit formed by two gates. The behemoth is trapped by the inner gate and gets its arm ripped off and bleeds out. Burt's response: "He's unarmed!"

    Board Games 
  • In Chess: "Checkmate." Do note that actually saying this aloud among serious chess players in a competition is considered Unsportsmanlike Gloating.

    Comic Books 
  • Batman: The Dark Knight Returns gives us this (somewhat infamous) gem:
    Mutant Gang Member: [facing Batman and holding a child hostage] Back off, man. I'll kill the kid.
    [Batman takes a step closer]
    Mutant Gang Member: Believe me, man. I will!
    [Batman stops, his eyes narrow]
    Mutant Gang Member: Believe me!
    [Batman takes a gun from a fallen mook and shoots the gang member deadnote Batman Returns style.]
    Batman: I believe you.
  • Black Dynamite: After the man-snake yells "I'm blind!" Black Dynamite kicks him off a cliff and says "And now you're dead too, sucker!"
  • Dirty Pair: A Plague of Angels lampshades this when Kei and Yuri reveal that their employer, the 3WA, included a "Combat Quips" course teaching this trope along with the rest of their training.
  • The Ultimates:
    • The final issue of vol 3 gives us the worst Bond One Liner imaginable. After a robot calls the Wasp "the mother" (It Makes Sense in Context), Ant-Man, her ex-husband, destroys it and shouts "If she's the mother...I'm the mother-fucker!" Do Not Want!
    • Captain America has just beaten Henry Pym to a pulp, giant size and all. "How big do you feel now, dirtbag?"
    • Issue 13 of Ultimates gives us this little gem from Captain America.
      Captain America: Surrender? Do you think this A on my head stands for FRANCE?
  • Watchmen:
    • Rorschach kills a mook trying to arc weld his way into Rorschach's cell by standing on the bed and smashing his toilet with his foot so that the water would reach the poorly insulated arc welder and shock the guy. In The Film of the Book this is changed to him smashing the mooks head into the toilet and then shocking him, but the follow-up line is the same.
      Rorschach: Hrm. Never used toilet to dispose of sewage before. Obvious really.
    • Also from this same issue, after Rorschach has just finished using a restroom to drown Big Figure:
      Rorschach: There. Did what had to be done. Can leave now.
      Silk Spectre: You're sure? After all, we don't want to go diving headfirst into things!
      Rorschach: Hrm. Good advice. Sure there are many who'd agree with you.
  • The formula for a Midnighter line seems to be taking a well known saying and substituting the word "me."
    Midnighter: It's not the fall that kills you. It's me.
    Midnighter: Look both ways before you cross me.
    Midnighter: Live by the sword, die by me.
    Midnighter: People shouldn't be afraid of their governments. They should be afraid of me.
  • Tomorrow Stories: Greyshirt once fought a man suspected of beating his wife at the newspaper presses where he worked. Long story short, the guy falls into the machine, with hundreds of papers being covered in his blood. When asked for comment, Greyshirt said "I guess now we know what's black and white and red all over."
  • In the final issue of Flashpoint, Batman who, in this universe, is actually Thomas Wayne ends up putting a sword through Zoom as he's boasting how the Flash could never kill him lest he breaks time again.
    Batman: Doctor's advice: never stand still in the middle of a war.
  • Planetary: John Stone uses one of these in a Steranko-style '60s flashback story after shooting a hole in an enemy plane's refueling hose and blowing it up with a flame thrower, crisping the flight crew.
    John Stone: Got a light?
  • Subverted by Shang-Chi, who noted in one story that he hates the tendency of some Western heroes to quip over a foe’s body. It’s distasteful to laugh at someone else’s pain or death.
  • In Blackest Night, Heatwave pumps out enough fire to melt Black Lantern Rainbow Raider's ring and destroy him. He quips, "Everything has a melting point."
  • Hawkeye: There's a funny subversion in Hawkeye (2012) when Barney Barton has helped his brother Clint fight off the Tracksuit Draculas.
    Barney: Sorry about that. Our guests didn't, uh... Guess you could say those guys really... They really... Those two guys, they... I threw 'em off the fire escape.
  • Alpha Flight #23 has Snowbird and Tanaraq fighting. Tanaraq says she doesn't "have the heart" for it. Her response is, "Neither have you!" while ripping his heart out of his chest.
  • Discussed in a Doctor Who (Titan) Ninth Doctor story when Mickey beats up some bee-like Insectoid Alien mooks:
    The Doctor: OK, you know I can't condone that.
    Mickey: The violence, or the fact that I didn't tell them to "buzz off"?
  • The Marvel villain known as the Scourge was a character who shot and killed minor supervillains. Nearly all of his kills were punctuated by him shouting "Justice is served!" Ironically, when the original Scourge was killed, his killer also shouted, "Justice is served!"
  • Contest of Champions (2015): Frank Castle drops one after he interrupts his futuristic counterpart's speech with a bullet.
    Frank: Wearing the skull. Didn't approve him.
  • The Transformers: More than Meets the Eye: After goading Star Saber into a chase and tricking him into flying straight into his blade, Cyclonus delivers one that perfectly highlights the difference between the two bots' faith.
    Cyclonus: May Primus forgive your sins... as one day he may forgive mine.

    Fan Works 
  • The Secret Diary Of Cameron Baum: Chapter 6, where Cameron killed a thug by smashing his head with a door, but not before telling him a joke John told her earlier.
    "When is a door not a door?"
    "Please. The shakedown was Frank's idea. Keep the money. Please. I need a doctor..."
    "When is a door not a door?"
    "I don't...please..."
    [after killing him] "When it is ajar, It is a joke. I'm a real hoot."
    The man does not laugh. He lacks a mouth. But his brains are everywhere.
  • This Bites!:
    • After Tashigi knocks out Mr. 3 in Chapter 19:
      Tashigi: That was for my men, you bastard...
    • Nami to Kalifa in chapter 37:
      Nami: Science lesson: be it a cloud or a body, Iron still conducts electricity.
    • Conis to Captain Sharinguru in chapter 41:
      Conis: We're all the heroes of our own story. Guess the world just found mine more interesting than yours.
  • White Devil of the Moon: Jadeite has just been obliterated by a Divine Buster after attacking Kyouya Takamachi's wedding in an attempt to assassinate Nanoha. Nanoha's sister Miyuki wipes her swords, which are covered in youma blood after the battle, off on her ruined bridesmaid's dress and asks, "Does anyone else have a reason why these two should not be wed?"
  • In Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Supergirl story The Vampire of Steel, a Kryptonian criminal called Zol-Am to two vampires who looked to have him for dinner and he literally fried:
    Zol-Am: Never hunt on an empty stomach. You get careless that way.
  • In the Discworld of A.A. Pessimal, the Assassins' Guild School teaches this skill as a course module, as part of its study course in Deniable Diplomacy. The course is taught by M. leBalouard, a man who likes his drinks shaken but not stirred.
  • Two Sides of a Coin: Eleya, a Bajoran, makes a baseball-related one after using her ship's Tractor Beam to smash two Romulan warbirds together.
    Eleya: Bean ball, take your base.
  • Worm - Justice For All: Taylor's reply to Hamelin right before she shoots him with a laser pistol.
    Taylor: Gun beats sword, you son of a bitch.
  • Dire Worm!: After teleporting all of the Slaughterhouse Nine except Siberian into space, DIRE says, "Welcome to Lagrange point five, Jack. Mind the gap."
  • For the Want of a Nail Series:

    Films — Animation 
  • In Atlantis: The Lost Empire, the defeats of Helga and Rourke lead to a chain of one-liners. Especially Rourke.
    Whitmore: What happened to Helga?
    Cookie: Weeeeeell, we lost her after a flamin' zeppelin come down on her— (Packard whacks him with her umbrella) Uh, missin'.
    Whitmore: And Rourke?
    Dr. Sweet: Nervous breakdown. You could say he went all to pieces.
    Cookie: In fact, you could say he was trans-a-morgified, and then busted into a zillion— (Packard threatens him with her umbrella again) Uh, he's missin' too.
  • In Batman: Mask of the Phantasm, The Joker delivers a death threat to a foe's apartment via phone, while a remote-controlled plane bombs said apartment to smithereens. The telephone used for the threat is intact enough for the Joker to deliver the following gem although Batman happens to be there and divert the plane:
    Joker: [over the phone] Hello? Hello, operator? I believe my party's been... Disconnected! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
  • In Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2, after Chester V is eaten by the Cheesespider, who then coughs up his signature orange vest.
    Manny: That will leave a bad taste in your mouth.
  • In Horton Hears a Who! (2008), Horton is being pursued by Vlad the Vulture, and in one scene escapes by sending Vlad off on a Tree Buchet, quipping, "This is where I get off," as he does. Later lampshaded when he remarks that he usually doesn't think of those until sometime later.
  • In Igor, Dr. Schadenfreude is investigating the recently-deceased Glickenstein's castle:
    Jaclyn: Glickenstein invented life?
    Schadenfreude: I don't think he had a hand in it. [camera pans to Glickenstein's dismembered arm on the floor]
  • Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox has Batman, Thomas Wayne, give one after giving Reverse-Flash a Boom, Headshot! with his gun in response to his Famous Last Words.
    Batman: There is now!
  • Mulan; during the final battle, Mushu flash-fries Shan Yu's falcon with a blast of fire breath:
    Mushu: Now that's what I call some Mongolian barbecue!
  • In Return To Never Land, Peter says this line after dropping Captain Hook into the ocean below his ship, just before dropping the pirate ship's anchor for Hook to hold on to:
    Peter: "Hey Captain, you forgot your anchor!"
  • Scooby-Doo! and the Witch's Ghost: When the book that Big Bad Duumvirate Ben and Sarah Ravencroft get trapped in is destroyed by a burning tree branch, Shaggy quips that "it would've been a hot best seller".
  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse: After curb-stomping Scorpion with Toon Physics, Spider-Ham delivers one in response to him calling Ham a "silly cartoon".
    Spider-Ham: Ohh, did THAT feel like a cartoon? [blows a raspberry]
  • In The Super Mario Bros. Movie, Luigi says the line "You just got... a-Luigi'd!" to a Dry Bones after apparently defeating it, discovering only seconds later that a Dry Bones takes much more effort to defeat than what he did.
  • Toy Story: By Woody, as he uses Buzz's karate action to drive away Sid's toys (who they think are cannibals at the time).
    Woody: Sorry guys, but dinner's cancelled!
  • A non-fatal example from Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, after Victor stabs a pitchfork through Lady Tottington's Anime Hair that leaves her stuck to a wall:
    Victor: Hm. I always liked your hair pinned back.

    Gamebooks 
  • Lone Wolf:
    • In Book 6, The Kingdoms of Terror, the mercenary captain quips after smashing the skull of a river pirate leader against the ship's mast.
      Captain: [gleefully] Ha! I've always said the Deldenians have no head for a fight!
    • In the graphic novel The Skull of Agarash, Guildmaster Mazrah comments about a pair of pirates getting skewered by a single arrow through both skulls.
      Mazrah: ... Nothing between the ears to stop it, you see...

    Literature 
  • From Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels:
    • Played straight in Guards! Guards! After the Watch corner the villain, Captain Vimes orders Carrot to "throw the book at him". Carrot, who has trouble with metaphors, literally throws his copy of The Laws and Ordinances of the Cities of Ankh and Morpork at the villain, causing him to stumble backwards over a ledge and fall to his death. Sergeant Colon remarks "What a way to go. Killed by a wossname, a metaphor," which Nobby Nobbs follows up with "Looks more like it was the ground."
    • Subverted in The Fifth Elephant when Samuel Vimes think of a few possible lines, then mutters "The hell with it" after killing the villain in proactive self-defense, because if he had been able to joke about killing someone, then it would have been too much like murder.
    • In a later novel, Going Postal, the narration indicates that if protagonist Moist von Lipwig had been "a hero," he would have thrown off a one-liner after tricking a monster into a gruesome death, but "since he wasn't a hero, he threw up."
  • Sandy Mitchell's Ciaphas Cain novels are replete with these, some witty, some silly, all hilarious.
    • Appears most frequently in the third book with current villains' battle cries:
      • "Blood for the Blood God!" "Fine, he can have yours!"
      • "Blood for the Blood God!" "Harriers for the cup!"
      • "Blood for the Blood—" CRUNCH! Gurgling Sounds "Well he's not getting mine..."
  • In the very first Animorphs book, Visser Three kills Elfangor by morphing into a monster and eating him.
    Visser Three: <Nothing like a good Antarean Bogg morph for... taking a bite out of your enemies.>
  • If this Star Wars example doesn't count, it comes seriously close. In Luke Skywalker's final duel (atop a cliff, naturally) with Lumiya, when she slips and falls, he grabs her arm. After saying, "I'd never let you fall," he cuts her head off. Played With a little because unlike most examples, he's being incredibly serious.
  • Parodied in Alcatraz Versus the Scrivener's Bones, when Alcatraz unleashes a Hurricane of Puns using the word soul after tricking the Villain of the Week into taking a book in the Library of Alexandria — which constitutes a contract to allow the Library's curators to claim your soul. All right, so it's not technically killing, but that's part of the joke.
  • In John Dies at the End, John gets several (of varying quality) after he "introduces" some wig-monsters to a folding chair.
    John: Have a seat, bitch!
    John: You've been sentenced to get the chair, motherfucker!
    John: You wants the committee, asshole, then you best meet with the chair!
    John: Anybody else want to donate blood to chair-ity?
    John: There's some dessert! With a chair-y on top!
  • In the novelization for Revenge of the Sith, the newly fallen Darth Vader uses several of these while killing the Separatist leaders. For example, when one cries, "We surrender! Please — you're a Jedi!", he responds "You fought a war to destroy the Jedi. (Stab) Congratulations on your success."
  • Averted in Black Dogs. After their first fight, Sadrao says "well, that was invigorating!". And the protagonist, Lyra, instead of some witty remark, just throws up.
  • Summer Rowe the genius engineer in Lacuna wants a gun like all the rest of the crew so she can deliver an xkcd-inspired line.
    Rowe: Because, you know, xkcd. They had this comic where they rated "potential action movie one liners" from most-probable to least-probable, and when we find the Demons I'm dying to pull out my gun and just go... "Bangarang, motherfucker." Like, from Peter Pan, the original novel.... seriously, that'd be so awesome.
    [later]
    Rowe: [puts the rifle against the Toralii's chest] Bangarang, motherfucker.
  • The Alex Rider series by Anthony Horowitz uses this all the time (which is fitting, since it's a deconstruction/homage to James Bond):
    • Launching a snowmobile at Dr Grief in Point Blanc, "It looks like I sleighed him."
    • In Skeleton Key when he uses a magnet-crane on Conrad, a villain with metal pins in his body, he remarks: "What an attractive man."
    • Damien Cray the villain of Eagle Strike, the fourth book, gets thrown out of Air Force One while "riding" a food trolley: "He went off his trolley."
    • Easily the best one comes in Scorpia, the fifth book, when Alex learns from his boss what happened to the villain of the story after the fact:
      Mrs. Jones: The satellite dish fell on her as she was trying to run away. She was crushed.
      Alex:' I'd have been disappointed too.
    • In Crocodile Tears, Desmond gets one after killing Bulman and putting his cadaver into a bulldozer: "It looks like Bulman got what every journalist dreams of - a scoop."
  • Nick Diamond from the Diamond Brothers Mysteries does this quite a lot.
  • The Dresden Files "For my next trick, anvils!" - said after redirecting an entropy curse onto a vampire causing said vampire to be hit by a frozen turkey that fell out of a plane.
    • "Moo."
  • Tamora Pierce's Lioness Rampant has one when after Alanna kills Alex she asks "Is this what it means to be best?"
  • Averted in Mystery Team; Duncan seems more stunned about killing someone than anything, and Charlie's only quip is:
    "I hope those were baby teeth."
  • In Space Marine Battles, Sicarius attempts one. However, the Necron he has just "killed" prompty stands up and turns the tables on him.
    The Undying: I am the king of the immortals!
    *CHOP*
    Sicarius: We are the slayers of kings!
  • In Artemis Fowl, Mafia metal man "Loafers" keeps a notebook filled with these corresponding to the occupation of the target that he killed, including such gems as: "I'm just doing this because I knead the dough!" (After killing a baker, naturally)
  • The War Against the Chtorr. In the short story Enterprise Fish, someone accuses the Jerkass protagonist McCarthy of being Not Himself after being changed into a Half-Human Hybrid, but changes his mind when McCarthy delivers a Bond One Liner after watching another Jerkass get swallowed whole for ignoring the Do Not Taunt Cthulhu trope.
  • In The Short-Timers, a Vietnam War novel by Gustav Hasford, sociopathic Marine Animal Mother, after beheading (already dead) Viet Cong female sniper quips: "Rest in pieces, bitch."
  • Journey to Chaos: Eric shows off his new confidence by throwing out one of these after defeating an academic mage in mercenary style, "leave the battlefield to the professionals, schoolboy."
  • In Chapter 26.1 of Worm, when Nice Guy's Jedi Mind Trick superpower is preventing the heroes from realizing he's an enemy they have to kill, Imp's Perception Filter superpower lets her through his defenses. She slits his throat, kicks him down the stairs into an acid trap, and tells his dying body: "My schtick."note  Also, previously in chapter 19.6 Skitter's comment after inciting Miss Militia to blowing Eidolon's clone, just after treading him with her bugs' silk affected by Clockblocker's power. Her comment on the result?
    Flicker that.
    • The sequel, Ward has Damsel of Distress give one of these after she kills Beast of Burden for attacking her and ordering her to stop pissing him off when she hadn't actually done anything this time.
    Damsel: You stop.
  • In the fourth Fablehaven book, after a massive demonic dragon has shapeshifted into human form and is caught up in a bout of Evil Gloating, a smaller fairylike dragon sneaks up and eats him before delivering this line:
    "You know," the dragon said, still chewing, "for such a bad guy, he tastes pretty good."

    Live-Action TV 
  • Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.:
    • When the team is trying to find a Killer Robot loose in the base, Mack and Elena begin having Casual Danger Dialogue about how the robot's creator should have seen this coming since it's what happens in every movie ever, and even mention a few specific films. So naturally, when Mack has a shot at the robot just as it's going on about how it has transcended its original nature by the power of the Darkhold, he sneaks up and interrupts its speech by way of an axe to the head. Head goes thud. Body goes thud. Everyone stares at Mack, who says: "Roll credits."
    • In Season 7, when the heroes have Wilfred Malick at gunpoint and demand that he come with them, he refuses, smugly telling them that they wouldn't shoot him and that S.H.I.E.L.D. will always fall behind the Chronicoms, because the Chronicoms can "see everything". Deke gets fed up with his ranting and coldly shoots him dead in the middle of his ranting, replying "They see that coming?"
  • Angel:
  • Arrow: In the episode "Unfinished Business", when Diggle goes to rescue Oliver at the mental institution, he manages to take down the doctor's assistant after some struggling with a defibrillator discharge at his head. Dig gets up and says a single word on the matter: "Clear".
  • Babylon 5:
    • Marcus Cole, upon beating the snot out of every single patron in a bar because he wants answers:
      "Bugger. Now I have to wait for one of them to wake up."
    • In "Into the Fire", Londo has Morden's "associates" killed via Beam Spam. The beams leave scorches on the floor.
      "I will have to have that painted over, I suppose."
  • Blake's 7. Being an amoral Snark Knight, Avon certainly isn't going to be left out. After an assassin is bitten by their own spider-creature and dies screaming, Servalan calls up and demands to know what is happening. Avon answers, "I'm afraid your friend is feeling the pinch."
  • The Blue Bloods episode "Ties That Bind" has Danny in a gun battle against some cartel thugs. After dropping one, Danny hides behind his car and counts the bullets from thug #2, then pops out and orders him to drop it when the guy runs out. The guy tries to fire, it clicks, and he goes for a backup piece and Danny puts two in his chest.
    Danny: Learn how to count.
  • Discussed in one episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, when action fan Jake tells Kevin that if he ever punches out a guy, he has to say something cool, like "Choke on that." Kevin is a bit emotionless and literal-minded, however.
    Kevin: But they're not choking. They're experiencing airway trauma. How about, "Better get some corticosteroids to treat that laryngeal fracture"?
    Jake: Okay, yeah, that's very informative and quite polite. But maybe add a 'dirtbag' at the end?
  • Buffy the Vampire Slayer both used and subverted this trope, as Buffy would nearly always have a Bond One-Liner after (or just before) killing a baddie, but occasionally she's mocked for using a stupid-sounding one, or the vampire would interrupt her while she is saying one.
    • Brought to the attention of the audience, when Willow tries to do a One-Liner in the first episode of season three ("Anne"), and when it doesn't work out, she explains that Buffy always says something clever, and she thinks it throws the bad guys off their guard.
    • Also parodied in "The Zeppo", when Xander tries to pull off a Buffy-style one-liner.
      Xander: You know, you gotta learn that if you're gonna play with fire then you'll have to be... [bad guy runs away] ... HEY! I wasn't finished!
    • Tara gets one in "Bargaining, part 2", but she doesn't go for humor.
      Tara: Nobody messes with my girl.
    • Near the end of "The Harvest", in a dark nightclub, about to be killed by a vampire, Buffy shouts out "But there's one thing you forgot about... SUNRISE!" and throws a microphone stand through a nearby closed window. As the vampire cringes in anticipation of his death, then realizes it's just a yellow light outside shining through the window, she explains "...It's in about nine hours, moron" and stakes the vampire from behind. How fun.
    • In "Prophecy Girl", Buffy knocks Giles out to keep him from facing death in her place - she then tells Ms. Calendar: "When he comes to, tell him...I don't know, think of something cool and tell him I said it."
    • The show even goes so far as to imply that this is one of her Chosen One powers: when she (temporarily) loses her abilities in "Helpless", she remarks to a recently-defeated foe, "If I were at full Slayer strength, I'd probably be punning about now."
    • In "Bargaining, part one", one liners are apparently the trickiest part of programming a life-like Robot Girl. Willow's attempt to (re)program the Buffy-bot to mimic the real slayer's style fails miserably, resulting in lines of gibberish after a successful slay.
      That'll put marzipan in your pie plate, Bingo!
    • Averted in the following episode when the real Buffy knocks down the demon biker's leader in an apparent She's Back moment...and then says nothing at all.
    • In "Chosen", after Buffy kills Caleb by splitting him in two with her new scythe. When Angel asks her where he is, she replies "He had to split." Subverted when immediately after she bursts out laughing.
    • Also subverted for The Worf Effect in "Out of My Mind", when Buffy first fights Glory, who delivers her own Bond One Liners while Buffy is punching her in the face.
    • "Hey Ken, wanna see my impression of Gandhi?" (SPLAT)
      Lily: Gandhi?
      Buffy: [Beat] Well, you know, if he was really pissed off.
  • In Community episode "Epidemiology" Troy gets out a few based on the costume of the person he just hit, before running out of ideas.
    Troy: [directed at Annie dressed as Little Red Riding Hood] Hey Annie what nice fists you have....IN YOUR FACE!
  • Conan O'Brien has a lot of fun with Arnold Schwarzenegger's tendency to do this. Once, when asked what The Schwarzenator would say if he killed someone with a knife at a wedding (part of the US citizenship exam), he stated "Ay Nhau Prounhaunz You Man... Ahnd Naif!"
  • Both a Quip to Black and a Bond One Liner, Horatio Caine of CSI: Miami is told he is a dead man. He promptly kills the man who said that and replies "Join the club." Cue the theme music. (YEAAAAAAHHHH!)
  • Doctor Who:
    • In "Revenge of the Cybermen", the Fourth Doctor gives an unusually thespian variant after murdering a Cyberman by injecting it with gold dust — "...dusty death. Out, out –!". Fortunately, Sarah Jane breaks him off just as he gets into it.
    • The Fourth Doctor in "The Hand of Fear", after tripping a treasonous megalomaniac into a bottomless pit — "The gravity of the law finally caught up with him".
    • In "The Deadly Assassin", the Doctor interrogates Time Lord politician Chancellor Goth after defeating him in a mental duel, who dies as the Doctor talks to him — "Typical politician — no answer to a straight question."
    • Criticized by the Fourth Doctor in "The Creature from the Pit": "I suppose you could say the yolk's on him, if you were the sort of person who said that sort of thing, which fortunately I'm not."
    • Unfortunately, the Sixth Doctor became that kind of person in "Vengeance on Varos" when, after witnessing two orderlies fall into a horrible certain death in an acid bath (owing to circumstances that the Doctor, if not directly, was at least partially responsible for), he murmurs "Forgive me if I don't join you." with a bit of a smirk on his face.
    • In "The Two Doctors", Six kills a cannibal with cyanide taken from a butterfly-collecting kit and followed it by quipping "Your just desserts" over his food-obsessed opponent's corpse. He later told his companions that the villain had been "moth-balled".
    • In "Revelation of the Daleks", Six gets two, after Davros's hand gets blown off — "No 'arm in trying", followed by "Want to shake hands?"
    • In "The Happiness Patrol", a minor villain's punning mockery of the gruesome murder of a political prisoner is used as an explicitly invoked Moral Event Horizon moment. Which may just possibly be a Take That! at the Sixth Doctor and the previous era's writers.
    • In "The Greatest Show in the Galaxy", the Seventh gets a couple in: "Join the club" after knocking out a robot clown with a juggling club, and "Just the ticket" after immobilising a homicidal robotic bus conductor.
    • "The Christmas Invasion": The Tenth Doctor has been wondering all episode about what sort of man he is. After killing the Sycorax leader, who was attempting to backstab him, by throwing a satsuma at a button:
      "No second chances. I'm that sort of a man."
    • "Day of the Moon":
      • FBI agent Canton Delaware shoots a Silent and then quips:
        Canton: Welcome to America.
      • After slaughtering a roomful of Silents, River gets asked what kind of doctor she is.
        River: Archaeology. Love a tomb.
    • In "The Husbands of River Song", the Doctor takes out a robot by plugging it into dozens of financial firewalls. He quips "He had a bad day on the market" to a bystander, makes his exit — and then doubles back to apologise for the joke.
  • Dollhouse's Ms. De Witt, with a British accent and deadpan delivery, was begging for one of these. She finally gets one in "Getting Closer", after Boyd shoots several of Rossum's men in De Witt's office. Her only comment? "I think we can both agree that that carpet is finally done for."
  • In Farscape, Aeryn probably has the best one. Minutes after she gave birth to a baby whom was basically a MacGuffin for the villains, she shoots the commander of said villains (a commander who subjected her to no small amount of pain in efforts to discover the identity of the baby's father) squarely in the head and deadpans "It's a boy. In case you were wondering." Do. Not. Fuck. With Mama Bearyn.
  • In The Flash, the episode "Going Rogue" has one of Leonard Snart's mooks saying that he wants out after their heist to an armored truck gets foiled. When he turns around, Snart promptly shoots him and quips: "Well, when you're out, you're out."
  • A variant from Flashpoint's first-season episode "Planets Aligned". The bad guy has a six-shot revolver, and has spent five, each shot causing the two SRU members chasing him to count it off: "That's three..." Two SRU members are trying to get him to stand down. In desperation, the gunman turns the revolver on himself.
    "That's six."
  • In Heroes, after puppetmaster Doyle's twisted game of Russian Roulette, Claire smashes a chair over his head and tersely says, "Show's over."
  • In one episode of Hogan's Heroes, the Heroes have blown up a fuel truck. Hogan makes a comment, addressed to Klink, to the effect that the driver should have put up a "No Smoking" sign.
  • House of the Dragon: Daemon Targaryen lets one out after cutting the upper part of Vaemond Velaryon's head off with his tongue (which King Viserys Targaryen wanted to remove after the insults to Rhaenyra and her sons) stil attached to his body.
    "He can keep his tongue."
  • The Investigation Discovery program Deadly Women provides an example of this in a dramatization of the murder of Stanley Cumberbatch at the hands of his ex-wife, Millicent. After stabbing a sleeping Stanley multiple times with a knife, Millicent stares down at the corpse and blood soaked bed and says the following:
    Millicent Cumberbatch: Rest in peace, Stanley!
  • The first thing that happens on Kenan is the title character accidentally setting off his house's security system, leading his father-in-law Rick to investigate while wielding a saxophone.
    Rick: I was just going to boink him and say "Sax to be you."
    Kenan: That actually would've been dope.
  • Lost:
    • Fake Locke (who just murdered two people as the smoke monster): "Sorry you had to see me like that"
    • In the Grand Finale, he receives one himself after Kate shoots him in the back (though he doesn't die right away): "I saved you a bullet!"
  • Madan Senki Ryukendo: "Embrace the darkness and sleep."
  • Occasionally used in the 60s spy series The Man from U.N.C.L.E., usually delivered by Napoleon Solo after he has dispatched a THRUSH mook. Given when the series aired and its premise, very possibly a deliberate Homage to James Bond. Ian Fleming, who created Bond, did concept work for the show.
  • Played with in The Middleman, after Wendy sneaks up behind a villain and injects him with tranquilizer:
    Middleman: Like a Bengal elephant.
    Wendy: The one who does the takedown gets to say the catchphrase.
    Middleman: Oh. I'm sorry. Be my guest.
    Wendy: Swift justice. [blows on tranquilizer gun]
    Middleman: Swift justice? Really?
    Wendy: [defensively] It was in my delivery!
    Middleman: Ah.
  • One of the sketches from Monty Python's Flying Circus is The Bishop, whose protagonist is a bishop (yes, with the crook and big hat and everything) whose attempts to thwart Mafia-type murders of the clergy always end in Bond One Liners.
    • Another sketch features Atilla the Hun (John Cleese) as a dad in a typical cheesy sitcom, giving his delighted kids a present - a severed head. "I want you to get a-head!"
  • Murdoch Mysteries: In "Rawhide Ralph" Murdoch gets challenged to a High Noon duel by a cowboy while trying to rescue Julia and Harry. He lets the cowboy count to two before drawing and shooting him in the arm. When the cowboy complains that he cheated, Murdoch dryly replies "You never said we were counting to three"
  • Mystery Science Theater 3000:
    • Subverted in Danger! Death Ray, which has the bots continuously chiding the Bond-esque hero of the movie for an inability to come up with any but the lamest of Bond One Liners (when he remembers to say anything at all).
      [Mook dives to his death from hotel window.]
      Bart Fargo: That's too bad.
      Crow: Oh, COME ON! What about "He really fell for me"?! "His hopes are crushed"?!
    • In Secret Agent Super Dragon, another lame spy film on MST, Joel explains how all spies have to go through a training regimen that includes a class on "Post-kill puns".
      Tom: You know, guys, I've just realized that being a spy is one of the only times when a pun is actually acceptable!
      Crow: Yeah! Ironically, death actually softens the blow of the pun.
    • And again in Agent for H.A.R.M., which features probably the wussiest Bond clone ever who fails to make a single quip throughout the entire movie, a fact which Mike and the Bots are quick to admonish him for (along with his generally being boring and smarmy).
  • The third season finale of Orphan Black has a memorable one from the Cute and Psycho Helena, who shows up covered in blood after massacring a den of gangsters who were threatening her "sestra's" family for money: "I got refund."
  • Parodied in an episode of She Spies, where D.D. and Shayne spend several minutes trying to guess what one-liner Cassie will use after dealing with the villain of the week.
  • Garak in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine loved these. After snidely berating then gunning down an old rival Cardassian, he quips "A pity. I rather liked him."
    • On a different occasion, after a different rival offered him a chance to end his exile by helping capture three dissidents, only to yank the opportunity away and tell him his exile would never end as soon as said dissidents were in his hands:
    Garak: *evaporates him with a disruptor* Some people should never be promoted.
    • Garak, after being introduced to Dr Bashir's very James Bond-like Holosuite adventure games, found himself wishing he'd been in that kind of intelligence service. Perhaps that's what gave him the idea to add the Bond One Liner to his repertoire. Whether or not that's the case, that type of one-liner certainly fit with his personality.
  • Star Trek: Picard: After beheading Tenqem (who had just disregarded the warning "Please, my friend, choose to live") in "Absolute Candor", Elnor states grimly:
    Elnor: I regret your choice.
  • In Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Weaver making a Bond One-Liner after killing an inconvenient employee is the first sign that she's much more complex and self-aware than the usual Terminator.
  • In this That Mitchell and Webb Look sketch (at about 1:38) two roommates planning a party are discussing various reasons why they don't want to risk James Bond showing up, one of which is because he threw a guy who insulted him out the window onto a fence railing.
    Mitchell: Everyone's in shock, except for James, who strolls over to the window, glances down, and says, "What a piercing bore."
    Webb: "A piercing bore"? There's no such expression!
    Mitchell: Well, right next to the railing was a rock crusher. It's pretty clear he'd wanted to say "what a crushing bore" but missed and was making the best of a bad job...
    • A later episode reveals that Agent Suave's one-liners are provided courtesy of a couple of third-rate comedy writers in a van outside the mission location, who in turn get them from a big book called 1001 Super-Spy Quips. Unfortunately, this backfires on them when it's discovered they're also providing this service for the villain.
  • A rather dark example from the second season finale of V "Now that's how you kill your mother."
  • Wizards of Waverly Place: Mason gets a great one in The Wizards Return, when he tells Alex that he'll handle Dominic.
    Mason: Go on, love. I'll just stay here - and have a snack.
  • In the My Babysitter's a Vampire episode "Blood Drive", both Ethan and Sarah get these in:
    Ethan: End of the road, car-nivore!
    [Ethan tries to ram impromptu stake through the overturned vampiric car when Sarah brushes him aside and takes the stake]
    Sarah: This blood drive's over!
    [stakes the car]
    Ethan: Thanks. [beat] You didn't have to one-up my line, though.
  • Lampshaded in the Cold Open of the Superstore episode "Workplace Bullying." Dina tackles a robber and quips, "Look who's grounded now." She brags to Jonah that she did a "Law & Order type zinger," but he's too busy calling the police to notice.
  • The Practice: In "Avenging Angels" a man lights his daughter's killer on fire while he's in the hospital after posing as the orderly delivering a meal, asking "Will it be orange juice or gasoline with your eggs?" when he first poured gasoline on him then quips "Better check his temperature. He's burning up." after the medical staff rush over.

    Magazines 
  • The magazine Slate features the results of a contest for reader-submitted Bond One Liners. The winner of that contest was "Flights of angels sing thee to thy rest, pissant."
  • MAD did a parody of the movie Charade, focusing on its lighthearted tone in the face of mayhem. The glamorous leads trade quips as their adversaries die horribly, like when one is found drowned in a bathtub: "Too bad he died before he had a chance to come clean!" - "This crime has a familiar ring to it!"

    Music 
  • Lupe Fiasco's song "The Coolest" features one. After gunning down Michael Young History, who was bragging that he was the "Coolest mothafucka in the world," his killer remarks:
    "Ain't too cool now, is you, nigga?"
  • In the very old ballad "Lady Isabel and the Elf Knight", Lady Isabel elopes with a knight and when they come to the seashore he boasts that he's drowned six king's daughters here "And thou the seventh shall be". But Lady Isabel tricks him and shoves him off the cliff herself, and depending on the version, says one of two things: "Six king's daughters hast thou drowned here,/Go keep them company." or "...and the seventh has drowned thee."

    Myths & Religion 
  • The Bible, Book of Judges: 15:16- Then Samson said, "With an ass's jawbone I have made asses of them. With an ass's jawbone I have killed a thousand men." (He had just used the jawbone of a donkey / wild ass as a weapon). One possible translation made to preserve the pun is something like "With the jawbone of an ass, I have heaped them in a mass." In the original Hebrew, the word for "donkey" sounds like the word for "heap" making a better pun.

    Podcasts 
  • The Adventure Zone: Balance: Taako passes out during the boss battle with the liches Lydia and Edward, but after they're defeated, his player Justin begs to be allowed to make one of these. What he had in mind is so great, DM Griffin allows it, saying Taako woke up just long enough to say three words before passing out again:
    Liches... get... stitches!

    Pro Wrestling 

    Radio 
  • Also parodied in one of the "Party Planner" sketches on BBC Radio 4's That Mitchell And Webb Sound (and on the TV adaptation). When the two characters are trying to decide whether or not to invite James Bond to a party, one recounts an event from a previous party at which Bond threw somebody out of a window for saying that his cigarette case was "gay". The victim landed on a railing spike and was paralysed.
    Webb: Everyone's in shock, apart from James, who strolls over to the window, looks down and says: "What a piercing bore."
    Mitchell: "Piercing bore"? There's no such expression!
    Webb: Well, the railing was next to a crusher. It was pretty clear that he'd meant to say "crushing bore", but had missed, and was making the best of a bad job.

    Roleplay 
  • Survival of the Fittest:
    • Eduardo Trinidad-Villa kills Tanya Bonneville by electrocution. His line?
      Eddie: Original recipe or extra crispy?
    • Bobby Jacks also pulls one out after setting off an unintentional chain reaction of events leading to the death of Michael Anders.
      Bobby: Rube Goldberg would be proud.

    Tabletop Games 
  • To quote the Old Man Henderson after running over Hastur with a gas tanker rigged with C4:
    Old Man Henderson: Henderson here. Figured out what the nasties are weak against.
    Jimmy: What's that, Mr. Henderson?
    Old Man Henderson: Point blank annihilation.

    Theatre 
  • Macbeth has been told he is invincible to all those "of woman born." So naturally, upon killing Young Siward:
    Macbeth: Thou wast born of woman.
  • The Villain Song "Cell Block Tango" in Chicago has one from five of the six Murderesses (the only one who doesn't is Hunyak, who speaks Hungarian and insists she isn't guilty), albeit in the context of killers reenacting their deeds after the fact:
    Liz: So I took the shotgun off the wall and I fired two warning shots — into his head.
    Annie: You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic!
    June: And then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times.
    Velma: Well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out; I can't remember a thing. It wasn't until later, when I was washing the blood off my hands, I even knew they were dead!
    Mona: I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive — and I saw him dead!

    Theme Parks 

    Toys 
  • In LEGO's BIONICLE, Teridax eats/absorbs Nidhiki in order to gain more power for his fight with the Toa Metru. Apparently Nidhiki did not go down easily, because Teridax would later describe the event with, "I lost because I disagreed with something I ate."

    Video Games 
  • Ford Cruller in Psychonauts when he turns the Big Bad's main weapon (super-strength sneezing powder that makes the victim literally sneeze their brains out) on him in the climax. The one liner? Geshundheit. However, said villain survived.
  • Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain:
    Moebius: Aye, you have seen my plans, vampire, as I've seen your destiny; the future says you die.
    Kain: But I am dead...
    [chops off Moebius's head]
    Kain: As are you.
    • Kain reverses this in Defiance, confronting Moebius after self-resurrecting sans his vampiric heart. Moebius tries to paralyze Kain, only to have his hand forcibly placed on Kain's chest. Kain follows with "I always was considered heartless."
  • House of the Dead:
    • Many boss battles in The House of the Dead III and 4:
      James: [after defeating Temperance, a several-stories-tall obese zombie] Temper this, buddy!
      Kate: [after defeating the same boss] How do you like my no-fat, all-lead diet?
      Lisa: [after defeating the Sun, a tree-like creature] I never was any good at gardening.
      Lisa: [after beating Death, on the 2nd encounter] When a lady says no, she means it!
      Kate: [after defeating The Star, who had challenged Kate and James to a "test of strength"] Looks like you're the one who failed the test!
    • Even more so in The House of the Dead: OVERKILL, Where everyone (including the narrator) do this all the time:
      Agent G: [after killing a clown in the carnival] Stop clowning around.
      Isaac: [after slamming a zombie's head into a computer monitor showing a Blue Screen of Death] Looks like your computer just crashed!
  • Kingdom of Loathing: Lampshaded at the end of the level 12 quest. In fact, there are two versions, depending on which side you defeated:
    After blowing up the hippy camp via gas leak: You stare open-mouthed at the carnage that used to be the hippy camp, then remember you're obligated to make a witty remark. "Thanks, guys," you say, as you strut off the battlefield, "it's been a gas."
    After blowing up the frat house: You stare blankly at the destruction around you, then realize you're obligated to make a witty remark. "Remember, kids," you say as you strut off the field, "idiots and explosives don't mix."
    • It is possible to both avert the lampshading and the trope itself in the third ending (combining a flare-gun, 999 dead hippies and 999 dead frat orcs, defeating both sides). To replace it, there is a Pre-Mortem One-Liner, pointing out something both The Man and The Big Wisniewski have forgotten.
  • The video game Gun uses this in Hoodoo Brown's death.
    Hoodoo Brown: I'M HOODOO BROWN!
    [BANG] [CRASH]
    Colton: You were.
  • Metal Gear Solid:
    • In the original , (meaning the PSX one), Snake uttered this after shooting down Liquid in his Hind:
      [upon seeing the flames shoot high]
      Snake: That takes care of the cremation.
    • In Twin Snakes, the line is delivered while Snake calmly walks away from the explosion in slow motion.
    • Even worse in the novelization of Metal Gear Solid, where just about every line of Snake's is a groan-inducingly lame one-liner.
  • Interestingly, World of Warcraft contains a few of these. Pretty much any major Bosses will give some quips when they kill someone. While most are just general boasting, a few qualify. From Memory:
    Ionar: [Lightning Elemental] Shocking, I know.
    XT-002: [a giant robot with the personality of a child] I guess it doesn't bend that way!...
    Durumu the Forgotten: [a mutated demon with many eyes] Do you see what I did there?
    Khadgar: [in response to a demon lord taunting that he and the player were "doomed to fail"] It seems you were doomed to fail, Lord Kalgorath!
  • Team Fortress 2: The characters will drop their own Bond One Liners, independent of the player's input. This often happens when you kill the same player four times without being killed by them in response, earning a "Domination".
    Sniper: How many times have you died? I'm actually getting impressed!
    • The Demoman does this at the end of "Meet the Demoman," after blowing a bunch of BLU team mercenaries to bits with a massive sticky-bomb trap.
      "Oh, they're gonna have to glue you back together - IN HELL!"
    • Being styled after 1960's spy fiction, and possibly Bond himself, the Spy is naturally the king of this trope.
      Spy: Sorry to "pop-in" unannounced.
      Spy: [to Scout] You died as you lived: running away!
      Spy: [to Pyro] You look like death warmed over...
      Spy: [to Engineer] Did I throw a wrench into your plans?
  • Parodied/lampshaded in the "Dashwood and Argyle" radio series in Fallout 3 after Argyle dispatches a traitorous Femme Fatale:
    Dashwood: Good God Argyle, you- you ripped out her heart!
    Argyle: I always knew this broad was heartless...get it boss? Heh-heh, heartless...
    Dashwood: Your kung-fu skills are unparalleled old chum, but your comic delivery leaves something to be desired.
  • In Fallout: New Vegas, Boone has one if you take him along to kill Caesar.
    "Thumbs down, you son of a bitch."
  • In the Mass Effect series, Renegade Shepard can have a few of these. The most famous comes in the second game, where a mook responds to one of Shepard's questions with, "I've got nothing more to say to you." Shepard pushes him off of a very tall building before saying, "How 'bout 'goodbye'?" If Jack is present, she'll declare that she needs to take lessons from Shepard.
    • The Citadel DLC closes out the series with one of the finest examples ever. After Shepard catches his/her clone and their accomplice, Maya Brooks, Shepard is obviously barely restraining him/herself as Brooks taunts them. If you play as a Renegade, you'll get this amazing exchange after Maya is already in cuffs:
      Brooks: Admit it Commander. You'll miss me.
      [Brooks breaks out of her cuffs and starts running; Shepard pulls out their pistol and shoots her in the back]
      Shepard: Not at this range, I won't.
    • In both the Paragon and Renegade versions of the above events, skipping the interrupt will result in one of Shepard's squadmates doing it instead.
      Brooks: You know you'll miss me.
      Brooks tries to run away, but a gunshot is heard. She falls over to reveal one of Shepard's squadmates with his or her gun still raised.
      Kaidan: Not likely.
      Ashley: I was really hoping I'd get to do that.
      Garrus: You know, I meant for that to be a warning shot. Ah, well.
      Wrex: [to Shepard] You're getting slow.
      Tali: Well, I won't miss you, you crazy bosh'tet.
      Liara: As escape attempts go, I've seen better.
      James: I don't think so.
      Javik: Problem solved.
  • Ah, Snarky!Hawke, what would Dragon Age II be without you? S/he delivers this awesome one-liner to Duke Prosper after you kill him by throwing him off a cliff:
    Snarky!Hawke: It looks like the Duke... has fallen from grace.
  • In Command & Conquer: Tiberian Dawn, Seth is Nod's Second in Command, giving the player briefings for the first half of the Brotherhood's campaign. He eventually plans to betray Kane and the player; in a briefing where he's about to send the player into a hopeless attack on the Pentagon, he claims "You see, power shifts quickly in the Brotherhood". Seth is shot by Kane about thirty seconds after this; shoving the corpse aside, Kane says "Yes... power shifts more quickly than some people think". Even more badass because this is the first line you ever hear Kane say. It's even funnier at the end when Kane quips "Oh, and congratulations on your promotion," while glancing down at the dead Seth and then back to you.
    • Alternatively, anything said by the Commandos. "Real tough guy! That was left-handed! I've got a present for ya! Keep 'em comin!" etc, etc.
    • The Navy SEALs in Command & Conquer: Red Alert 2 add on to the original Commando lines with the classic "A lil' C4 knockin' at ya door!".
  • Star Wars: Republic Commando has Trandoshans (bipedal fat, green ugly lizard aliens) with flammable-gas-laden backpacks. Shoot one in the back, and the backpack will ignite, lifting the unfortunate Trandoshan ten feet up like a jetpack before exploding. Quirky teammate Scorch will comment on this with lines like "Woo! Fireworks!" or "Hey, I didn't know Trandoshans could fly!"
  • The original Resident Evil, with Chris's iconic line after killing Plant 42: "Looks like we got to the ROOT of the problem!"
  • In Resident Evil 4: Separate Ways, after killing Krauser, Ada quips "That's a large thing you have there... But I don't like it when men play rough."
  • City of Heroes: When fighting bosses, if they kill defeat you, many will say something witty.
  • No More Heroes: "It's open mic night in hell, old man. Sing all you want down there."
  • Dystopia: Players can use context-specific taunts after kills.
  • In SWAT 4, some of your squadmates have some one liners after finding a dead/incapacitated suspect along with normal chatter
    *after killing a female robber at a convenience store* "Guess her Bonnie and Clyde days are over."
    *after killing a gang member at the A-bomb nightclub* "I'm not much of a dancer, but neither is this one now."
  • The James Bond games are naturally full of these. One, in Agent Under Fire, if you choose to push The Jackal off instead of shooting her to death, M calls asking what happened. Bond's response? "She's fallen for me."
  • In Splinter Cell: Conviction, Sam Fisher will throw out one of these after a fight ends.
    • Fisher gets a famous one in one of Blacklist's side-missions should you take out a guard dog:
      Grim: The file says he owns a prize-winning showdog. Purebred.
      Fisher: Time to update the file.
  • Grand Theft Auto:
  • Speaking of Rockstar Games... in Red Dead Redemption 2, Arthur Morgan can spout off a few of these to a bunch of the foes he's killed. In one example, he hears a Lemoyne Raider talking to a bunch of other Raiders with a tall tale about his near-death experience he had when he was nearly blasted by a grenade "in the summer of '62"; once his tall tale is finished, Arthur can blast them all to kingdom come.
    "Ain't gonna live to tell this tale."
  • In Borderlands each character will automatically taunt any elite opponent or any opponent that dies to a critical hit after getting a kill.
    Mordecai: So big, so angry, so dead.
  • As a James Bond parody, naturally Clank has plenty of these in his Show Within a Show in Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal.
  • Dead Rising 2:
    • Chuck Greene is pretty good at these.
      [boss falls onto table saw after declaring "I'm twice the man you are!"]
      Chuck Greene: I saw what you did there.

      [boss is killed by zombie in a bridal gown]
      Chuck Greene: You may now kiss the bride.
    • In Off the Record, Frank West gets a few of his own.
      [boss is crushed by a falling platform]
      Frank West: Sorry. I'm not into flat chicks.
  • JC Denton uses one in Deus Ex, after casually blowing up Gunther Herman with his killphrase "Laputan Machine".
    JC: Sticks and stones...
  • Rico Rodriguez from Just Cause 2.
    Rico: [after blowing up a pipeline or other large structure] Don't take it personally. It was a design problem. That's all.
    Rico: [after blowing the hell out of a satellite broadcast facility and free-falling to the ground] And that concludes our broadcast day.
    Rico: [after completing any settlement by blowing stuff up or collecting pickups] It's a tough job... But someone's gotta do it.
    Rico: [blowing up a statue that the villain erected of himself] Ouch! That's gonna hurt the big man's ego!
  • Caleb, of Blood. However, he only gets specific when defeating bosses, otherwise they're usually generic comments on how much pain he's dishing out, or an Evil Laugh.
    Caleb: You kids shouldn't play so rough... somebody's gonna start crying.
  • Everyone in the Unreal Tournament series excels at these: bots will automatically taunt after killing another character, and players can set it so they automatically taunt after a kill as well.
  • Gears of War: Many of the main characters spout off one-liners, especially after scoring a headshot.
    Marcus: Look ma, no face.
    Baird: Mmm mmm, juicy! [and] A little too much off the top there, sorry about that.
    Dizzy: HAAAAAA! TAKE IT!
  • Vega Strike has a node in each Dialogue Tree for killing another unit. Mostly for flavour, but some are funny. Rlaan turn out to have a Warrior Poet streak.
    Merchant: And I aint gonna sell you a new one, neither.
    Hunter: It's a pity there's not enough left of that to mount.
  • Batman: Arkham Series:
    Black Mask: You don't need to do this. I'll give you money. Drugs! Guns! Weapons! Whatever you want. Please. I'll take a plane. Leave Gotham. Never show my face again. Anywhere you want. I'll go anywhere!
    Red Hood: How about you go to Hell?
    [Red Hood kicks Black Mask out the window, letting him fall to the streets below]
    Red Hood: Say hi to Joker for me.
  • Halo gets these for the player characters in Firefight mode, and NPCs in general, sometimes preceded by a Pre-Mortem One-Liner. In some games, even the player characters in Campaign will have these.
  • Tomb Raider has Lara Croft raining these. A notable example from the third game:
    Mook: For some people, like yourself, we get a special bonus!
    Lara: I'm flattered.
    Mook: I mean, I could even retire early from you!
    Lara: Then you'd might like to mind the bell.
    [Mook gets thrown off the rooftop from a swinging bell]
    Lara: Happy retirement.
  • Pit delivers quite a few in Kid Icarus: Uprising, which, given the nature of the game are lampshaded more often than not.
    Defeating the Space Kraken:
    Pit: Calimaried!
    Palutena: What a sucker.
    Defeating Phosphora:
    Pit: Did you see that thunder!
    Phosphora: No, because you can't see thunder.
    Defeating Cragalanche:
    Pit: In your rock face!
    Viridi: That's your idea of a victory taunt? Please.
    Defeating the Heart of Hades:
    Pit: Your heart wasn't even in it!
    Pit: And I'm still just talking to myself...
    Defeating the Space Kraken, again:
    Pit: That's right, you tentafool!
    Palutena: Tentafool? Uh, nice one, Pit.
  • Brain Dead 13: In Vivi's Salon, when Vivi gets pushed into the Beautifier and gets defeated by it, but not killed, Lance makes a Badass Boast at her:
    Lance: Hey, Viv! I'll take a rain check on that... bite!
  • As an Affectionate Parody of 80's action movies, Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon has quite the collection of these for various actions.
  • Final Fantasy X: Lulu of all people pulls these when she casts Black Magic, with such gems as:
    Lulu: [using Blizzara] Let me break the ice!
    Lulu: [using Water] Anyone thirsty?
    Lulu: [using Osmose] Care to share your thoughts?
    Lulu: [using Ultima] Know pain... but not for long.
  • Bravely Default: Kamiizumi pulls one of these if you do Qada's sidequest before his, Kamiizumi gets fed up with Qada's boasts about his superiority, and shuts him up.
    Qada And... and then... the world shall be—
    *eviscerated*
    Qada: ...mine...
    Kamiizumi: Not the world of the living.
  • In Alpha Protocol, you have the option of giving Thorton several of these depending on how ruthless you are. The crown example probably comes from mob-boss Konstantin Brayko, if you take him with you to fight his treasonous ex-boss who is protected by an olympic boxing champion.
    Surkov: Championchik!
    Brayko: Your bodyguard is busy winning gold medal in dying. I gave him 6.4 on the dismount, but he did not stick the landing. But, you can talk to him soon.
  • Saints Row:
    • In Saints Row: The Third, you wind up crushing Phillipe Loren under a giant metal ornament. When the boss realizes this, he makes a Bond One-Liner, or depending on the voice you've chosen, comments on his lack of one.
      Boss: Damnit. I should have thought of a "Belgian pancake" joke.
    • Saints Row 2 has this at the end of the Brotherhood storyline.
      Boss: [holding a gun to Maero's head] Any last words?
      Maero: Go to hell.
      Boss: [pulls the trigger] Sorry, didn't catch that.
  • In Desperados after killing an enemy with a knife:
    John Cooper: Next please!
  • Saints Row: Gat Out of Hell: After crashing the wedding of Satan's daughter.
    Johnny Gat: [shoots Satan in the face] I love weddings.
  • In Telepath Tactics, Emma makes a snide comment referencing Archos' overconfidence after she takes him out.
    Archos: [at the start of the battle] Frankly, I thought there'd be more of you. You do realize that you're all as good as dead, right? Oh well — not my problem. I can just say that there were more of you, then sell off the excess golems.
    [...]
    Archos: Aha...ahahahaha! I'm...I'm dying?...
    Emma: Looks like you should've brought more golems after all.
  • According to the lore of Destiny, wielders of the exotic hand cannon, the Last Word, are prone to this, often using the gun's flavor text: "Yours, not mine."
    • The first recorded user of the Last Word, Jaren Ward, confronted a corrupt town magistrate and his cronies. The magistrate taunted Ward over his boasts and paid for it.
      Magistrate Loken: Those gonna be your last words then, boy?
      [ward shoots him in the head]
      Jaren Ward: Yours, Not mine.
    • The inheritor of the Last Word, Ward's protege Shin Malphur, sought vengeance on Ward's murderer, Dredgen Yor.
      Dredgen Yor: Many times I thought you'd faltered. Given up... But here you are. This is truly an end...
      [Malphur shoots him dead]
      Shin Malphur: Yours... not mine.
  • In Marvel vs. Capcom: Clash of Super Heroes, should Onslaught be victorious, depending on his form, he'll either declare "You shall be the first to fall" or the more haunting "The Dream is Dead."
  • Persona:
    • Persona 5: Whenever an All-Out Attack is prompted, the character that initiated the attack will drop a line right after the enemies have been cut to pieces, and get a splash screen with a Badass Boast of some kind on it:
      • Joker: THE SHOW'S OVER.
      • Skull: FREAKIN' BORING!
      • Mona: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
      • Panther: OMG!! WE ARE SO AWESOME!
      • Fox: IT WAS FUN WHILE IT LASTED. GOODBYE.
      • Queen: JUSTICE HAS PREVAILED.
      • Noir: ADIEU.
      • Crow: MY SOLE INTEREST IS UNCOVERING THE TRUTH.
      • Caroline and Justine: DON'T BE SO COCKY.
    • Persona 5 Royal adds 4 more:
      • Oracle: GIT GUD!
      • Black Mask Crow: I DECIDE THE TRUTH.
      • Violet: BEAUTY IS DEVOTION.
      • Lavenza: DON'T BE SO NAÏVE.
    • Persona 3 Reload revamps All-Out Attacks to include a splash screen with a Badass Boast included on it, in a similar vein to the All-Out Attacks of Persona 5.
      • Makoto: DONE AND DUSTED.
      • Yukari: THERE YOU HAVE IT.
      • Junpei: THAT'S THE GAME!
      • Akihiko: ON TO THE NEXT BOUT.
      • Mitsuru: KNEEL BEFORE ME.
      • Aigis: TARGET NEUTRALIZED.
      • Ken: DON'T LOOK DOWN ON ME.
      • Koromaru: WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!
      • Shinjiro: DON'T WASTE YOUR BREATH.
  • Haiji Towa from Ultra Despair Girls has this to say after you defeat Nagisa Shingetsu, who has issues regarding living up to expectations:
    Guess he wasn't "expecting" that! ...Sorry, that wasn't very funny.
  • Happens occasionally in Overwatch, though due to the way it's coded, your character may sometimes wind up talking tough to an inanimate object like a Bear Trap.
  • King's Quest is fond of these any time you die. Below are just a few examples (to put it lightly):
    • After you get eaten upon falling into the moat: "The moat monsters appreciate your good taste."
    • After you get rolled over by a rock: "A crushing defeat."
    • After you jump off a cliff: "Your attempt at cliff diving was a smashing failure."
    • After you get killed by an ogre: "You were warned ogre and ogre again..."
    • After a wolf devours you: "How many times have you been told not to wolf down your food?"
    • After you drown into a cistern: "Well, well, well! Water you going to do now?"
    • After a dragon burns you with his breath: "By venturing too close to the dragon's flame, you made an ash out of yourself."
    • After you fall off a beanstalk: "Looks like you had a bad fall this spring."
    • After you fall off the path in a dark cavern: "WHOOPS!!"
    • After you fall from the sky: "Next time, keep your feet off the ground and your head out of the clouds."
    • After a giant makes a human pancake of you: "The giant did a smashing job of defeating you."
    • After you get headbutted to your doom: "You found a hidden joke, but unfortunately became the butt of it!"
    • After being cooked for dinner by a wicked witch: "The witch has turned you into a gingerbread man. Or is that a Graham cracker?"
    • After you get mauled by a rat: "Rats!"
  • In Call Of Duty Infinite Warfare, after Salen Kotch finishes his Final Speech from the captain's chair of the Olympus Mons (or doesn't, if the player is so inclined), Nick Reyes stabs him in the throat and tells him "Captain has the comm."
  • In the Diablo II: Lord of Destruction opening cinematic, a hapless messenger tries to warn the Prime Evil Baal not to attack the city of Sescheron. Baal congenially plays along with the parlay... briefly.
    Baal: I will take your position...into consideration.
    [Baal detonates the messenger with a wave of his hand]
    Baal: Well! It seems your terms...are unacceptable. [Evil Laugh]
  • In Soulcalibur VI, each character has a quip they say if they finish off a character with their Critical Edge. Some notable ones include:
    Ivy: You missed your chance for mercy.
    Taki: You'll be lost to history!
    Raphael: With my blade, I shall forge a new world!
  • At the end of Primrose's first chapter in Octopath Traveler, after she defeats Helgenish, he makes one last-ditch attempt to kill her by stabbing her In the Back, but she retaliates by slitting his throat while he's charging at her. He spins around for a few seconds before dropping dead, prompting Primrose to say this:
    Primrose: "Quite the dancer yourself in the end..."
  • Whenever a pilot kills a Vek in Into the Breach, they will occasionally make a comment on it.
    Lily Reed: [Vek killed by being knocked into water] That Vek's got a great future as an anchor.
  • Control: After Tommasi, the old Head of Communications is killed by Jesse:
    Jesse: I guess the Bureau should start looking for a new Head of Communications.
  • The Legend Of Zelda C Di Games: In "The Wand of Gamelon", Zelda delivers one of these after killing Hectan. In response to his agonizing cry of "You've killed me!" she cold-bloodedly says "Good!" with a slasher smile.
  • In Conker's Bad Fur Day, after Conker flushes the Great Mighty Poo:
    Conker: Now that's what I call a bowel movement!
  • In Brütal Legend, Emperor Doviculus can't help but note how easy it was to kill the humans' new king Lars.
    Doviculus: It seems I had less to worry about than I thought.
  • In Mortal Kombat X and Mortal Kombat 11, when a Brutality is performed, the character on the giving end will usually deliver a one-liner after the fact (assuming they can speak, of course).
  • In Ultimate Custom Night, many of the Suddenly Voiced animatronics deliver some parting words if they manage to catch you— usually something sassy about your impending doom. For example, Withered Bonnie (who has no face) might say "Time to face the consequences of your failure."
  • Dying in Cuphead causes the boss you were fighting to give a death quote related to whatever their theme is, many done in rhyme. Here are some of the first ones you can get in the game, from the phases of the Root Pack battle, the Root Pack being a potato, an onion, and a carrot respectively:
    Sal Spudder: Buttered, smashed, and mashed. It's over for you.
    Ollie Bulb: Hey little guy, it's O.K. if you have to cry!
    Chauncey Chantenay: I'm lean, mean, and full of beta-carotine.

    Web Animation 
  • One of the Red vs. Blue bonus videos, called "Sargeisms", was entirely dedicated to Sarge giving off large quantities of Bond- and Pre Mortem One Liners.
    "Dr Sarge says take 2 barrels of this Shotgun and call me when you're dead!"
    "Or my personal favorite 'You just got Sarged!'"
    • Which is taken up again in Episode 3 of Revelation where Sarge and Grif are kicking Wash's ass and the former is about to finish the job with his Shotgun. He starts saying "You just got..." and ends up shooting before he's finished. The very next thing Sarge says is "Goddammit, I messed up my one-liner!"
    • A less humorous example occurs in Reconstruction. Washington takes Delta's advice that South Dakota no longer "hamper their progress" and points a gun at her. She starts to say "What are you going to do, shoot-" after which Wash says, "Yes. Good suggestion."
    • "My name is Leonard Church, and you will FEAR MY LASER FACE!"
    • After Tucker stabs Wyoming, he goes "That's right bitch. I take care of my kid."
    • The episode with the Zealots who behave like in an actual Halo deathmatch has two, ("Oh you fucking camping bitch!") "It's a legitimate strategy!" and ("What did you mean we could work as a team?") "I bash you in the head with my rifle and you die. Good teamwork you fucking noob."
    • Once Sharkface is shot dead: "You know, I don't think he'll be getting up from that one."
  • Several examples from Wolf Song: The Movie:
Cobalt after brutally slaughtering Zar: “Boring!”(To his packmates) “alright you lot, let’s move”
Death Alpha after tearing out Arrow’s throat: “guess I just killed a force of nature”

    Webcomics 
  • Black Mage from 8-Bit Theater in this comic
    Thief: I don't think he heard you, BM.
    Black Mage: He got the message though.
  • In this strip of Holiday Wars, April Fools' Day discusses one-liners and then uses one as he defeats Labor Day in a fight.
  • Subverted in this Dominic Deegan strip. "Aw man, I totally should've shouted that afterwards!"
    • Also played with at the end of the War In Hell arc. After his enemy is dispatched by Stonewater using an ice attack on his earthly form, Karnak muses that this is the perfect time to deliver a line like, "Hell's frozen over," but Karnak's always hated those jokes.
      • Considering, before he became a demon lord, he knew Donovan Deegan who is known for his Puns, this may qualify as Fridge Brilliance.
  • Rob and Elliot discuss the fact that James Bond must get depressed whenever he just shoots a guy.
    "I guess you... got... shot."
  • In Kevin & Kell, we get this by proxy when Angelique takes R.L. to prison to take the place of his body double.
    R.L.'s doppelgänger: Hey, what's going on?
    Angelique: R.L. is taking your place. I'll smuggle you out.
    R.L.'s doppelgänger: NO WAY! IN HERE EVERYONE IS TERRIFIED OF ME! I LIVE LIKE A KING! I'M NOT LEAVING!!!
    [R.L. eats his doppelgänger]
    Angelique: In a way, he was right.
    R.L.: [burps]
  • One issue of Scud The Disposable Assassin has Scud stick his gun in a target's mouth and say "Something funny." before pulling the trigger.
  • The Adventures of Dr. McNinja:
  • A beautiful one from Breakfast of the Gods, after killing Count Chocula by summoning the sun:
    Dig 'em: What was he?
    Tony: Not much of a morning person, obviously.
  • Gunnerkrigg Court: Not a death, but the same principle: after Antimony destroys the Enigmarons' Death Ray, Kat insists (over Annie's protests) that the situation calls for a witty quote. The best that Annie can manage on such short notice is "I hope you like your... smashed... death ray!"
  • Girl Genius:
    • Dimo of all people pulls one off in an earlier chapter. After Gil destroys two giant spider-walker tanks with lightning blasts prompting the crews of the remaining walkers to surrender, he asks to speak to their commander, only for an officer to inform him that Gil's lightning attack had killed the commander as well as the second and third in command. And the fourth?
      Officer: [pulling a knife on Gil] That would be me, madboy!
      [a throwing knife gets embedded in the officer's skull]
      Dimo: [holding another throwing knife] Hoy! So who else vants to be promoted?
    • Martellus delivers a dark line after killing a Jäger by repeatedly shooting him at point blank range after asking him some questions and having a perfectly civil conversation with him.
      Martellus: And I know this: the best way to catch a monster is to be a bigger monster.
    • After Tarvek kills one of the conspirators who thought that since Tarvek was a hero he wouldn't retaliate to an attack with lethal force, he quips:
      Tarvek: I've never really considered myself the "hero" type.
  • After being struck with a medicine ball, El Chupacabre of Goodwill Heroes delivers a nice one, much to Jazz Man's dismay.
    CHUPE "Have a taste of your own medicine... ball."
  • Schlock Mercenary:
    • When Kathryn fries the opponents' Powered Armor into flaking away.
      Ennesby: Wow. They're like popcorn.
      Kathryn: [shoots them before they recover] Weak simile. These have to be popped twice.
    • Another particularly good example from an earlier arc:
      Mook: I'll die before I—
      [Plasgun shot]
      Ennesby: "—finish my sentence", I think he was going to say.
  • Blade Bunny attempted this.
    Bunny: I guess you can say that ... um ... something clever involving trees and killing people.
  • In Commander Kitty, Fluffy attempts one of these. She quickly corrects herself, but the effect is lost.
  • In MS Paint Masterpieces these are used by a lot of characters. Subverted on one occasion, when a badly-damaged Mega Man tries to do one after delivering the fatal blow, but passes out before he can finish.
  • From Terra page page 247, as a comment on an attempted pre-mortem taunt:
    Mook: [to Grey, whom he has by the throat] That slave is coming with me. But not before I snap your—
    BLAM!
    Alex: That slave isn't going anywhere.
  • In Homestuck, Spades Slick parodies this by failing repeatedly to come up with good time puns after killing Sawbuck about five times in a row.
  • Sluggy Freelance: In "Six Months Later", when Kitten Stranglir is fighting Oasis and has just slammed her against the wall.
    Kitten: You know what, Red? I thought this fight was going to last longer.
    [three seconds later, she's dead and Oasis stands up]
    Oasis: I didn't.
  • Parodied in Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, strip 2011-04-15: "Any joke that ends with a pun can be converted to an action movie scene."
  • Keychain of Creation: Marena gets one shortly after revealing that she lied about not being able to fight. It's non-lethal, since the victim can Pull Themselves Together, but immediately Lampshaded:
    Marena: He was a distance fighter. So once I got close, he just sort of... fell to pieces.
    Gunslinger: [Elsewhere, its head resting near the pieces of its body] ...I think my cliché-dar is going off.
  • Unsounded:
    • In the prose story Vienne of Seferpine, Vienne delivers one after killing a government assassin who came to investigate her rebellious activities. It's not directly related to her kill, though, and is actually addressed to a bystander who previously gave her a chauvinist speech about how women can only do what their husbands allow them to.
      Gerald cried out. Vienne regarded him over one shoulder, dropping the pymaric in her pocket.
      “No one lets me do anything,” she said.
    • After Emil runs the image obsessed Hetr through after Hetr has just made a rather ridiculous sounding statement in his bragging Hetr manages to say Don't... let those be my last words... as he falls. Emil responds with Don't worry. No one's ever gonna look them up.
  • This xkcd strip has a few lines we're less likely to see as Bond One Liners.

    Web Original 
  • The Evil Overlord List, Number Seven, lists the only acceptable One Liner for villains:
    When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."
  • An inevitable compilation (involving lots and lots of James Bond and lots and lots of blood) will be found here. Enjoy.
    Corben Dallas: Anyone else wants to negotiate?

    Web Videos 
  • In Jerma985's "The Lob Slobs", after Jerma and Star_ managed to kill a sizeable amount of people in the vent using the grenade spam tactics, Jerma gave this trope out.
    Jerma: Welcome to the Lob Slobs den!
  • In Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Walter manages to pair this perfectly with a Pre-Mortem One-Liner when eliminating a group of traitors.
    Who wants daddy's belt? [slaughters the traitors] Now, think about what you've done.
  • The "Pistol of Armageddon" series of Hitler Rants videos often translates Burgdorf's "DAS REICHT!" as this every time he uses the eponymous superweapon on something.
  • In Entry #86 of Marble Hornets, after Alex lists all of the people he's killed thus far and starts strangling Tim, Tim manages to stab him in the side of the neck before saying "You missed someone."
  • Critical Role has a good few, being a livestreamed D&D campaign. One of the fan favourites comes from Percy, when he kills Clarota:
    Percy Some people have no sense of fucking honour!
  • Dzwiedz 24 spouts them with gusto, both as himself and as Doktor Dźwiedźrespekt.
    Doktor Dźwiedźrespekt: And bam! Is chicken... dinner!
  • The Great Nerf War:
    • The Web Series has multiple instances, for example:
      Oliver Rhodey: Zombs away!
      Solomon: Those aren't yours!
      Captain Edgar: You're on thin ice, boy.
    • This is also made fun of when Harry asks "How come I don't have any fun one-liners?"
  • Video Game Dunkey has many great ones, though they're usually groan-worthy.
    Dunkey: [to a Witch that has been modded to look like a sandwich] Bitch. I said no mayonnaise.
  • Discussed and subverted on an episode of Game Grumps, when Arin and Danny come up with a theoretical character who is incredibly competent and badass, but when he gets an opportunity for a one-liner, all he can come up with is a stuttering "... yeah... you're... poopy!"

    Western Animation 
  • Archer, despite being spy fiction, regularly averts this, with the agents occasionally trying and failing to come up with a Bond One Liner when the time comes. However, one-off character Conway Stern has a knack for them, much to the others' annoyance.
    Lana: Sorry, Conway! You're... awww, wait, I had something for this...
    Conway: Is it something like, "You don't get off the hook this easy?"
    Lana: Damnit!
    Archer: Yeah, he's good at those.
  • Avatar: The Last Airbender:
  • Codename: Kids Next Door:
    • When Numbuh Five is about to activate the cheese bomb to destroy an infestation lice monsters, Numbuh Two suddenly bursts into the room and tells Numbuh Five she has to say a one-liner before using the bomb. His rambling, however, manages to distract the lice long enough for Numbuh Five to activate it anyway.
      Numbuh Two: You gotta say something cool first! Like "Say Cheese Punk", or "Cheesed to meet you." Nononono, wait I got it! Cheese— [blast]
    • During the Series Finale episode "Operation I.N.T.E.R.V.I.E.W.S.", Numbuh One gets one of these as the Delightful Children all fall into a giant toilet:
      Numbuh One: I always wondered how those guys went to the bathroom together.
  • Family Guy:
  • While technically a three-liner, in Justice League Time villain Chronos executes a mook for treason by sending him through time to one minute before the dinosaur-killing asteroid impact.
    Chronos: Do you know what killed the dinosaurs? [...] Well, Chucko does.
  • In the Looney Tunes short "The Unmentionables", a man tried to call the police from a phone booth while gang violence was going on, only to get cut in half by machine gun fire, with the operator quipping "I'm sorry, you've been disconnected."
  • Scooby-Doo of all people gets to do this in an episode of Scooby-Doo! Mystery Incorporated. After crushing an evil robotic double of himself, he says: "Play dead." This is a follow-up to several dog-related puns Freddie unsuccessfully tried to use as Bond One-Liners.
  • The Simpsons:
    • Being a thinly-disguised version of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rainier "McBain" Wolfcastle uses these.
      • In "Last Exit To Springfield", McBain pops out of an ice sculpture, shoots everybody at the table down, and then quips, "Ice to see you."note 
      • Another McBain movie in "King Of The Hill" has the hero jumping onto a jet in mid-air, tearing open the cockpit and breaking the pilot's neck. Marge, upon watching, chuckles and says "Now that's what I call breakneck speed!" Bart immediately admonishes her, "Mom, a man just died."
      • In "Oh, Brother, Where Art Thou?", after infiltrating a meeting of villains and killing every last one of them, he quips, "Meeting adjourned." A sexy woman shows up and he adds, "And now I am thinking of another meeting. In bed."
      • In a non-McBain movie in "The Bart Wants What It Wants", Wolfcastle plays a secret agent going undercover as a high school nerd. When hassled by a couple of jocks, he quips "The geek shall inherit the Earth," then picks one up and throws him through the other's chest.
      • During the same episode, Ranier says "Remember when I said I would eat you last? I lied." to a steak.
      • In the episode "The Way We Was", McBain is being chewed out by his superior, who finally says "You're outta here McBain!" McBain then shoves him out the window. He falls several dozen stories, screaming the entire time before landing in a water fountain. "That makes two of us."
    • Also seen in a Radioactive Man comic when the titular superhero tosses a villain into the sun and asks, "Hot enough for you?"
    • In "Lisa the Beauty Queen," Skinner is faced by the Blue-Haired Lawyer and his goons, claiming a copyright infringement by the school fair saying "The Happiest Place On Earth." He then proceeds to beat them up with frightening efficiency, before adjusting his tie and saying "Copyright expired."
    • In the "Treehouse of Horror IX" story "Hell Toupée", after killing the vengeful sapient scalp of the executed murderer Snake, Chief Wiggum quips "That's what I call a bad hair day".
    • In the Treehouse of Horror XXVI segment "Wanted: Dead, then Alive", when Sideshow Bob whacks Bart multiple times with a sledgehammer, mutilating him to a bloody pulp:
      "We're both going to be sore tomorrow!" [cackles in glee]
    • Ironically, considering the whole episode is a Shout-Out to the James Bond series, "You Only Move Twice" goes out of its way to not feature a Bond one-liner, which results in hilariously banal banter between James Bont and Hank Scorpio.
      Bont: Scorpio, you're totally mad.
      Scorpio: Ha; I wouldn't point fingers, you jerk.
      Bont: So do you expect me to talk?
      Scorpio: I don't expect anything from you except to die and be a very cheap funeral! You're gonna die now!
  • In American Dad!, Stan electrocutes four mooks at once and quips "I just made a killing in the shock market!". Turns out it's just part of a training exercise, and when their performance is assessed the quality of their wisecracks is taken into account. Stan however is one-upped by Duper's one-liner, as Duper addresses his grenade just before tossing it: "Lucy! You got some 'splodin to do!"
  • Dan in Dan Vs. gets a couple in "Dan vs. the Dentist". After destroying the dentist's army of robots (It Makes Sense in Context ... sort of), he quips, "Rinse that out and spit!" Then after causing his tooth-shaped lair to self-destruct:
    Dan: "Now that's what I call tooth decay!"
  • Star Wars: The Clone Wars:
    • General Grievous gets one in "Duel of the Droids" after he kills a greedy Gha Nachkt.
      Grievous: There's your bonus.
    • In "Escape from Kadavo", the odious Keeper Agruss is captured by Obi-Wan and makes the mistake of saying that he knows "a Jedi won't kill an unarmed man." Unfortunately for him, Captain Rex is also in the room, and after a meaningful glance from Obi-Wan, immediately impales Agruss with a thrown spear.
      Rex: I'm no Jedi.
  • In the Superjail! Season 2 episode "Lord Stingray Crash Party", Alice kills Mistress Kilda by grabbing her by the boobs and splitting her in half with her bare hands. She says this after she drops what's left of the body to the ground:
    Alice: I knew it. [squishes water balloon] Fake! Euro-skank.
  • Duck Dodgers has the title character deliver one of these after dropping a giant ice boulder onto the Queen of Mars. She survives, but only due to Cartoon Physics.
    Duck Dodgers: Giant rock takes Queen.
  • In The Batman/Superman Movie:
    Harley Quinn: [watching the aircraft crashing with the Joker in it] Puddin'!
    Batman: At this point, he probably is.
  • Batman: The Animated Series:
    • In "The Mechanic", after the Batmobile explodes and Batman and Robin are assumed dead, one mook says, "Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-Bat's all, Folks!" He then cracks up laughing.
    • A non-lethal variant, after watching Batman make a coin logo fall on Two Face (a villain who often flips a coin to make decisions), knocking him out:
      Commissioner Gordon: That's a first. A coin flips Two Face.
    • In "Never Fear", Scarecrow knocks Bruce Wayne into a crocodile pond and says, "Welcome to the food chain." However, he doesn't stick around to watch Bruce beat the crocodiles and escape.
  • Big City Greens: In "Chipocalypse Now" after Chip Whistler gets slung out of Big City in his chopper:
    Cricket: And that's how ya launch a chicken into space.
  • A villainous example in The Snow Queen (2012). The Snow Queen jokes about Vergard and Una's frozen bodies after killing them.
  • After the Utrom Shredder is defeated in Turtles Forever, Mirage Leonardo says, "The Shredder... Has been shredded."
  • In the big conclusion of Star vs. the Forces of Evil's 4-part season 3 premiere, Ludo of all people gets to deliver one to Toffee.
    Toffee: Only I know how this all turns out!
    [Ludo pushes over a large pillar to crush Toffee]
    Ludo: It turns out you're dead.
  • In an episode of Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm, Jax destroys a cyber enemy and goes "Rest in peace... or should I say Pieces!"
  • Early in the Batman: The Brave and the Bold episode "Deep Cover For Batman", Silver Cyclone, the Evil Counterpart to Red Tornado, taunts the Red Hood with his backstory, noting that his psyche "bent but did not break". At the episode's climax, where Cyclone's speech pronouncing his hatred for all humans is interrupted by Red Hood destroying his head, the latter throws the bit back at him.
    Hood: Who's broken now, Cyclone?
  • In the Spider-Man: The Animated Series episode "Mutants Revenge", Herbert Landon falls into the vat of the chemicals he had manufactured while attempting to retrieve the last copy of his life's work from the Hobgoblin. Assuming him dead, Hobgoblin makes a quip about scientists always getting so immersed in their work before departing.
  • The Venture Bros.: After Brock Samson decapitates an enemy with a shark wearing his shirt and hair that's been suspended between two buoys, he drops one as he takes the guys' fishing hat.
  • Ultimate Spider-Man: Taskmaster drops one after launching the Midtown High gym coach through the football field goalposts via booby-trap in order to take his place:
    Taskmaster: Well coach, looks like you finally broke that state field goal record.

    Real Life 
  • According to this New Yorker article, averted by the SEAL who shot Osama Bin Laden.
    "For God and country—Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo." After a pause, he added, "Geronimo E.K.I.A."—"enemy killed in action."note .
In Zero Dark Thirty, they add, before it's confirmed that it's Bin Laden (leading to "Geronimo"), "We might have jackpot."
  • Following his assassination of Abraham Lincoln, John Wilkes Booth jumped from Lincoln's stall onto the stage (where he twisted his leg) and declared "Sic semper tyrannis" to the audience before running off ("Thus always to tyrants", the Virginia state motto and a claimed statement of one of Julius Caesar's assassins). It's also said that he added: "I have done it, the South is avenged!"
  • During an Allied bombing raid on Berlin in 1945, Nazi judge Roland Freisler (as portrayed by Andre Hennicke in Sophie Scholl: The Final Days) was blown up in his own courtroom, the only person who met death in court that day. Louise Jodl (wife of General Alfred Jodl) was working at the hospital that day when Freisler's body was brought in — who was despised even by his fellow Nazis — a nearby worker took one look at the corpse and made the supremely badass comment "God has delivered His verdict."
  • When Soviet Minister of Foreign Affairs Vyacheslav Molotov was in Berlin for a conference in November 1940, the RAF bombed the city centre just to embarrass the Germans. Quoth Churchill: "We were disappointed not to be invited to the proceedings, but decided to make sure we were not forgotten."
    • It gets better. While they were waiting in their bomb-shelter, Joachim von Ribbentrop assured Molotov that Germany's war with The Commonwealth was going splendidly and that their enemies' military power had been destroyed. Molotov is reputed to have replied "...so why are we in here, then?"
  • Another WWII example: The St. Nazaire Raid involved loading an obsolete Royal Navy ship with delayed-detonation explosives and ramming it into a drydock in occupied France. The ramming didn't go quite as expected, with the detonation not taking place at the expected time. Later the next day, while being interrogated, one of the captured sailors was told by a German officer that the damage inflicted by the ramming was minimal and easily repaired. Cue the massive Delayed Explosion and the grinning sailor's reply of "We're not quite as foolish as you think!".
  • Yet another WWII example: after the American victory of the Battle of Midway, a key turning point of the Pacific War that crippled the Japanese naval forces, Admiral Chester W. Nimitz, the Commander of the Pacific Fleet, couldn't resist inserting a little pun on the following press interview:
    "...Vengeance will not be complete until Japanese sea power is reduced to impotence. We have made substantial progress in that direction. Perhaps we will be forgiven if we claim that we are about midway to that objective."

Alternative Title(s): Post Mortem One Liner, Bond One Liners

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