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Hi there. If you're reading this, you probably have too much free time. Fortunately for you, so do I. So here's a bit of information about me.
I'm a student who's always had a passion for fiction - books, movies, whatever. I look for works that do something creative and show me something I've never seen before. So, when a girl I was dating told me she was into anime and manga and recommended that I start reading Fullmetal Alchemist and watching Baccano!, I got completely hooked. I've recently taken up a mild interest in tabletop gaming after reading Erfworld - the creativity required to think of the ending to book 1 made me look for a situation in which I'd have to exercise that kind of outside-the-box thinking for myself. These days, my downtime is spent serving as the film critic for my school paper, banging out short stories for a writer's club, managing the creation of a collaborative online rock opera, playing guitar and bass, running a Legend campaign, and dealing with school.
My biggest project, however, is Remus, a webcomic that aims to radically reimagine the way dystopian fiction is written. Never let it be said that I'm aiming too low.
I'm a Serial Tweaker, an Eclectic, and a proud member of PLATTER. I'm currently floating around Writers Block.
Those of you familiar with the awesomeness that is DOUBLE K may have seen a little video I threw together that Captainosaka was nice enough to feature.
But enough of me gushing about me - time for you to gush about me!
Vandalism!! Whoo!!
Other stuff:
Projects
- Remus: A webcomic. More info can be found on its page.
- Script Frenzy: Accidentally deleted the file before I could go anywhere with it. Never bothered to rewrite it.
- Help Me: A 36 page comic that I did for English class after reading Maus. Due to the fact that I was in the middle of a very bad Creator Breakdown while I was writing it, I destroyed it once I got better. Currently rewriting it in my spare time to make it more clear that it's Through the Eyes of Madness.
- The UG Rock Opera: Stuck in Development Hell, to the point that it's frequently referred to as UG's Chinese Democracy
- Currently running a Legend campaign, details here.
- A Dogs Life: Not writing it, but I did star in it as part of a school one-act festival.
Pages I've launched:
Pages I monitor:
I provide examples of:
- A Darker Me: Inverted, if you can believe it. I'm actually nicer online than I am in real life, mostly because I have time to think through what I'm saying.
- The Anti-Nihilist
- Apologizes a Lot
- Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!: A mild example.
- Badass Beard: I certainly like to think so, anyway. Also shows up a lot in my work.
- Berserk Button: Several, but the only one big enough to effect an actual immediate personality change is defective tech and/or badly written instructions. If I'm trying to do something, the instructions aren't working, I can't Macgyver a solution, and other help is not forthcoming, I go from my usual laid-back Nice Guy self to being an impatient short-tempered Jerkass in 10 seconds flat. And I flip back just as soon as it's working again.
- Big Ol' Eyebrows: They have been mistaken for caterpillars. Runs in the family.
- But Not Too White: I'm a walking aversion. I have two skin colors: linoleum white and extra crispy.
- Card Games: Decent at Blackjack, BS, Spit, Mao, Egyptian Ratscrew, and Bid Whist. Very, VERY good at poker.
- Class Clown: Minus the attention seeking - I only chime in when I think what I'm saying is funny.
- Covert Pervert: People who don't know me that well tend to be very surprised the first time they hear me talk about sex. Mostly because I don't really make any effort to beat around the bush.
- Cursed with Awesome / Blessed with Suck: While having to manage my incredibly loud voice day to day is certainly annoying, my natural loudness means I don't have to work at all in order to project well while acting.
- Development Hell: I have a tendency to get bogged down in this.
- Doesn't Like Guns: Except in fiction.
- Embarrassing Nick Name: "Werewolf." It Makes Sense in Context.
- Even Nerds Have Standards: I'm pretty high up on the hierarchy, although it's balanced by being in just about every single category on the first row.
- Every Scar Has A Story: But the only memorable one involves my little sister kicking me in the shin. She was wearing figure skates at the time.
- Evil Laugh: Mine scares children. Only when I want it to, though - my real laugh is much more jovial.
- Evil Me Scares Me: Some of my more... visceral ideas get this reaction out of me.
- Fake Brit: I have two good British accents, and both of them are good enough that I'm able to fool actual British people with very little difficulty. Until I start getting geography questions, at which point I drop the act.
- Fiery Redhead: Sort of.
- For Happiness
- Game Master: Well, yeah.
- Generation Xerox / Identical Grandson / Like Father, Like Son: My father's side of the family has some damn strong genes. Pretty much every single physical trait I have also appears on him. The exceptions are hair *
Mine is red and brown, his is jet black. This skipped a generation - my grandfather was ginger , height * I was almost 6 feet tall by the time I got to high school; he was 4'9" , and the specific details of our individual vision problems * He's farsighted, I'm nearsighted . We're both avid readers and movie buffs, with similar taste in music (although I've always been willing to go heavier than him).
- Good Parents: I couldn't ask for better.
- Go-to Alias: As noted elsewhere, Kyle Jacobs is actually one of these. I mostly use it on the internet and when I'm accosted by overly friendly drunk people. I'm also known to use Greg Smith.
- Grammar Nazi: I'm not that anal about it, but a really easy way to get me ticked is to screw up its/it's, their/there/they're or say would/could/should of. Really, internet?
- He Cleans Up Nicely: 90 percent of my wardrobe consists of T-shirts and jeans. The rest contains some very, very nice suits that I look very, very nice in.
- Idiot Hair: Not anymore, since my frustration with this led me to shave my head down to stubble. I've since decided that I look better that way.
- And as it's grown back, this has slammed back into effect.
- I Just Want to Have Friends: And frequently need to remind myself that I actually do.
- In Touch With His Feminine Side: Lack of athleticism? Check. Lack of aggression? Check... up to a point. Open, emotional personality? CHECK (assuming I trust you enough to drop the act). Also, I'm very interested in cooking and people have a tendency to mistakenly assume I'm gay or asexual.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: I'm this on a bad day.
- Keet: On occasion.
- Lazy Artist: Less lazy, more utterly incompetent.
- Large Ham: When I want to be.
- Let's Get Dangerous: Any time I actually get worried about someone, I drop everything and do what I can to help out.
- The Loonie: I'm this in real life, but only when I think it's funny.
- Loud of War / Make Me Wanna Shout: I'm certainly capable of this; see No Indoor Voice below.
- Man of a Thousand Voices: Let's see... I can do three distinct types of Guttural Growler, the Gollum voice, the Stitch voice, Mr. Burns, Marge Simpson, Riff Raff, three types of Fake Brit (Cockney and RP are solid enough to fool actual British people, and I'm working on my Yorkshire), Fake Russian, a decent Southern drawl, a bad Scottish accent, an even worse Irish accent, Badass Baritone (although that one never gets any more subtle than your average BRIANBLESSED role), a decent impression of Spongebob, and a few more that aren't based on anything but my sheer desire to be annoying. This made me one of the go-to guys for reading dialogue in English class, at least until the incident detailed under Sir Swears-a-Lot happened.
- The cockney recently got a workout due to my casting as an old British mongrel in a one act play.
- Martial Pacifist: My philosophy on violence. It definitely shows through in my work.
- Metal Head: Although it's worth noting that outside of an appreciation for horror movies, an incredibly in-depth knowledge of the genre, and a few mild Nightmare Fetishist tendencies, I don't fit the stereotype at all.
- Stop Being Stereotypical: And I tend to have this reaction to the ones who do - I get enough crap about my tastes without these guys forcing me to explain to everyone else that they're heavily in the minority.
- Motor Mouth: Whenever I get very involved in fixing something, I pretty much become this.
- Multicolored Hair: It's a mixture of Ginger and dark brown, with a jet-black stripe running down the middle of my beard and equally black eyebrows. All of this is completely natural.
- Myers-Briggs: Textbook INFP. Literally everything in this article (aside from family conflicts) is 100% accurate.
- Nightmare Face: Capable of pulling an incredibly creepy one.
- Nightmare Fetishist: Not to the extent of most, but I am fascinated by the macabre and enjoy scaring the shit out of people considerably more than is likely healthy.
- Nightmare Fuel Station Attendant: I can go from normal to completely fucking terrifying and back within the span of about 3 seconds. This isn't just me pumping myself up, either - I've actually made every single person in one of my classes simultaneously either jolt in their seats or scream (except for a close friend who's seen me pull this stunt before) on multiple occasions. It's as easy and quick as flipping a switch.
- No Indoor Voice: My regular speaking voice from 5 feet away measures roughly 88 db. For reference: A jackhammer is around 90 db. This is without making an attempt at raising my voice - I'm more than capable of yelling loudly enough to cause temporary hearing damage.
- Noodle Incident: At present, there is a full deck of playing cards glued to my ceiling. Not even I know why I decided to put them there, although the most likely candidate is Alcohol Induced Idiocy.
- No Plans, No Prototype, No Backup: The reason I was never able to finish my Script Frenzy entry.
- Not So Badass Longcoat: The coat itself is fine and actually looks quite good on me (especially when it's windy). I, however, am about the furthest thing possible from badass.
- Only Sane Man: I've been building up this reputation lately over at Ultimate-Guitar's forums, although they'd likely tell you I'm more along the lines of Strawman Has a Point.
AvengedFoghat (A user who I rarely see eye to eye with, in response to the post referenced below) : I love how everyone hates on [Kyle] when he's being the most reasonable.
- Ordinary High School Student
- Proud to Be a Geek: I'm quite proud of the fact that I write a webcomic, love Sci Fi, am an avid gamer, and am very, very into movies, and will gladly talk about those interests with friends should the topic come up (and it does). However...
- Closet Geek: 99% of the people I know in real life have absolutely no idea that I'm even remotely into Anime, and I prefer to keep it that way.
- Real Name as an Alias: Actually, I don't use this - Kyle Jacobs is a pen name that I took on in an attempt to balance my desire for privacy with the fact that people just aren't going to take "Remus, by FrustratedRocka" as seriously as they would with something that sounds like a real name on it.
- Real Men Wear Pink: I firmly believe this - not that I'd ever follow the trope name literally, but that's just because I don't think I look good in the color.
- Religion Rant Song: I've written a Type 1 and multiple Type 3's.
- Ridiculous Procrastinator: Oh dear lord, where do I begin with this one...
- The Roleplayer: With a dash of The Loonie.
- Sad Clown: Used to be one. I keep up the clowning these days, but I've gotten much happier.
- Serious Business: If I decide to get involved in something, it instantly becomes this.
- Shameless Self Promoter: In case you haven't caught on yet.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: Again, considerably more so in real life than online. Pretty much every session of my Legend campaign where I've been on the mic has qualified for Cluster F-Bomb.
- This has actually gotten me in trouble once in a while when I accidentally let myself off the leash. Most notably, I once translated the passage that gave us the name Country Matters into modern English. While keeping the vulgarity level roughly the same. In the middle of English class. While the teacher was present. To be fair, I did substitute a slightly less vulgar alternative for the big one.
- Stepford Smiler: Recovered type 1. Fortunately, I Got Better. My main reasoning was that I didn't think anyone would be able to help me out anyway, so it would be better not to burden them with worrying about me. That philosophy didn't work out all too well.
- That said, I really don't like to let people into my personal life unless they're close to me.
- Strip Buffer: I'm personally prone to bouts of extreme busyness, so I pretty much have to maintain one of these to avoid an enormous unplanned hiatus. Not that it helps all that much...
- Sugar and Ice Personality: Most of the time, I consider myself pretty amiable, if a bit overly boisterous. Other times... not so much.
- The Shepherd: Not so much on this forum, but definitely on the Ultimate-Guitar.com boards under the name of FrustratedRocka. Unfortunately, my frequent association with a good 90% of the UG Resident Freak population occasionally takes its toll on my ability to be nice.
Me: tl;dr GROW A PAIR. Context This followed a somewhat passive-aggressive rant against a bizarrely well-liked Hikkikomori arguing the merits of my Determined Defeatist tendencies that actually earned me a bit of respect from the other regulars. - Too Dumb to Live: Almost, but this incident requires a bit of context. I used to have a very strong stomach for spicy food, but wasn't familiar with exactly how hot some things were. I'd participated in a Tabasco chugging contest recently, and thought I was invincible. So, when my friends were discussing the extreme spiciness of Dave's Insanity Sauce (a review of which is listed on the Blazing Inferno Hellfire Sauce page), I thought I would be able to handle drinking a spoonful of the stuff. Straight. The resulting heartburn put me off hot sauce for years.
- Trademark Favorite Food: Drunken Noodles. Preferably really spicy ones.
- Troper Types: Eclectic.
- Uncanny Valley: I can act like this - more to the point, I can and do turn it on and off pretty much at will. Because the reactions I get are priceless.
- Wangst: Prone to this, though considerably less so than I used to be. That said, I still have my bouts with it, which is why you see some of the more emo/self-deprecating/bitter tropes listed here despite the fact that I'm genuinely happy or at least content about 75% of the time.
- You Are Not Alone: I have to remind myself of this on a disturbingly regular basis.
- Younger than They Look: I'm 18 and currently look like I'm roughly 22. To say nothing of the fact that I was 5'10" and shaving all the way back in seventh grade.
My work provides examples of:
Things Mr. Jacobs Is No Longer Allowed To Do In An RPG:
- If I see signs of an impending boss fight in a tomb, I cannot open the coffins, dismember the skeletons, and shove the individual bones through a closed portcullis.
- I am not allowed to make choo-choo noises when the GM attempts to dissuade me from doing this.
- If my character attempts to reason a point, and has a high enough intelligence score that they can reason it well, the point may not be completely stupid.
- My tail does not give me +5 to acrobatics.
- Do not allow the party to split. EVER.
- I really should have learned this lesson after my first ever session left me stranded in a trap-filled room... while everyone else was fighting a boss. The fact that I kept failing my perception and thievery checks led to the following immortal line:
ITT: We all fight the boss while Kyle plays Nethack.
- Not allowed to force the party into fighting in a cramped hallway just because I'm trying to keep the session moving.
- Especially not when they are all level one and are dealing with a level four barbarian. It's worth noting that this would have been balanced in their favor if not for the fact that they were trapped in a hallway.
- Not allowed to cannibalize NPC names from whatever I have lying on my desk.
- If the campaign is set in feudal Japan, I am not allowed to play as a Tiefling heavy metal bard whose guitar is also an axe and on fire. Because he's underpowered.
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