Funny / Lily Orchard

aka: Lily Peet

In A Minute

My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic

• “Flutter Brutter in Five Minutes”: Lily is so done with Zephyr Breeze’s unwanted flirting towards Rainbow Dash.
  Lily: Rainbow’s on the verge of yelling “I’m gay!” and pulling Fluttershy into a kiss.
  Billy: Yeah, Zephyr seems to be really annoy—Hey, you’re shipping!
  Lily: FUCK YOU!
• "A Flurry of Emotions in Six Minutes" is a mix of this and pure cuteness, as it mainly consists of Lily going into Squee mode every second Flurry Heart is on screen.
  Lily: She's walking! And she's like a pupper! OH MY GOD, SOMEONE PINCH ME, THIS CAN'T BE REAL!
• Lily continues cooing over baby ponies in both It Isn't The Mane Thing About You and Once Upon A Zeppelin.
  Lily: I see da babu! We’re in for a good time!
• Rock Solid Friendship in Nine Minutes opens with Lily mocking a reactionary response to a previous week's Glass of Water video by comparing it to an angry bulldog.
  "Aw, is the little rage-bitch having a tantrum because I blew the lid on his absolute nonsense? I think he is! Look at this bulldog puppy! He's so mad, just like you."
• The funniest bit in Fluttershy Leans In in Seven Minutes comes not from Lily, but from Lizzy.
  Fluttershy: So while I appreciate your efforts, I no longer require your services.
  Lizzy: BLESS THIS HORSE!
• From Hard to Say Anything in Eight Minutes, there's the Running Gag of Lily pointing out all the lesbian subtext regarding Sweetie Belle, culminating in this line at the end when the CMC offer to help Feather Bangs woo a trio of girls.
  And that evening, the mission was a failure, and Sweetie Belle went home with three girlfriends.
  • Also in Hard to Say Anything Lily remarks that their plan for Big Mac to kiss a sleeping Sugar Belle is three felonies at once, and Big Mac's outfit is two of them.
• During "The Perfect Pear in Five Minutes", Lily has this to say about Billy's anti-shipping attitude:
  Lily: Drink in the adorableness, and take the stick out of your ass, and then clean it, and then put it back where you found it, and stop taking my sticks!
• Lily comes to a horrifying realization about Starlight in Uncommon Bond in Seven Minutes.
  "How did you even make friends in the first place? Have you just been quietly mind controlling ponies to think... oh my god, that is what she's been doing!"
• Upon Rarity's line of "Luxury cruises never sink!" in "Pony Point of View in Five Minutes", Lily tries to play the theme from Titanic, until she's told that copyrighted. Undeterred, she gets out a kazoo and plays the theme on it. She's still doing it during the end credits.

Steven Universe

• "Hit the Diamond in Three Minutes" consists entirely of Lily repeating "God Dammit Ruby/Sapphire!"
• A Running Gag in Alone At Sea in Four Minutes is following up any dialogue that paints Lapis as not as victimized or good as many believe her to be (plus the part where Lapis herself said Malachite was bad) with "Dialogue That Got Completely Ignored By The Fandom".
• "Crack the Whip in Three Minutes" has an Alpine Jasper emerge from the water onto the beach, growling. Lily's response?
  "Aww! Ish jusht a big puppy!"
• In "Mr Greg in Four Minutes", Lily discovers the reason why she hated The Legend of Korra. ''Legend of Korra'' had Republic City while ''Steven Universe'' had Empire City!
  Male Sith Warrior!Garnet: I fall to no-one!

Star vs. the Forces of Evil

• This brilliant moment at the very end of “Blood Moon Ball in Four Minutes”:
  Lily: (about Star and Marco) Awwwwww, they are just the sweetest things ever!
  Billy: Do you really have to ship ri—
  Lily: YES, BILLY! YES I DO HAVE TO SHIP RIGHT NOW! I’M THE CAPTAIN OF THIS SHIP, AND I’M GONNA SAIL HER INTO WHATEVER WATERS I DAMN WELL PLEASE!
• Spilling over from Alone at Sea, Just Friends in Four Minutes repeats the dialogue gag with an added twist of Shipping Goggles.
  Dialogue that went completely disregarded by the fandom because fuck you, you ain't fooling anyone.
• From Just Friends in Four Minutes, there's Lily's reaction to Marco and Jackie being an Official Couple:
  Lily: Aww, looks like Star needs a new boyfriend. We have to find another Disney character who's just as endlessly upbeat and happy, just as magical, just as much of an overwhelming delight to be around, and can also flip back and forth between dimensions at will.
  Sora: I'm back!

Lois & Clark

• In “I’m Looking Through You in Five Minutes”, Clark gets a phone call at his apartment, but since Lois is there and he’s Superman at the moment, he tells her that it’s Clark Kent on the phone with him. After a bit of small talk, he hangs up. It then cuts to a very confused Martha Kent on the other end. Cue Lily laughing so hard she falls out of her seat.
• This moment from “The Green Glow of Home in Six Minutes”.
  Jason Trask: (during the fight scene with Clark after discovering that he is Superman) Now, who goes first? You? …Or the human traitors who sheltered you all these years?
  Lily: Ohhohoho, you just threatened Superman’s Mom! (snickers) That means you’re going to die!
• ALL of “Pheromone, My Lovely in Seven Minutes”.
  Lily: This is a fanfiction! Between the wacky behavior, the villain needing Superman’s help and the fact that this woman is effectively a high school prom queen... Fanfiction!
• From "Vatman in Nine Minutes", when Lois is talking to Clark about her encounter with Clone!Superman:
  Lois: He smirked at me! Superman doesn't smirk!
  Lily: Excuse me? Superman smirks all the fucking time on this show! Where have you been, lady?!
• This bit from "Barbarians at The Planet in Seven Minutes". Lois, you're not fooling anyone.
  Superman: There are things about me that you don't know! That... you may never know.
  Lois Lane: What does it matter? I know you! And I don't mean "you" the celebrity, or "you" the superhero. If you had no powers at all, if you were just an ordinary man leading an ordinary life... I would love you just the same!
  Lily and Lizzy: BULLSHIT!
• From "The House of Luthor in Eight Minutes":
  Lois: You know, it's not just my family. Not one of the people I thought I was closest to is coming [to the wedding].
  Lily: Lois, that should be the red flag. Clark's not going because he thinks Luthor is the devil, the others aren't going, MAYBE YOU SHOULD CHECK FOR HORNS!
  • From the same episode, Lily’s reaction to right as Lois is about to tell Clark about her Love Epiphany, he tells her that his Love Confession to her in the previous episode was just an attempt to get her to change her mind about marrying Luthor, but the audience sees him doing a Lying Finger Cross.
  Lily: Just... just fuck you!

Disney Animated Canon

• "Pinocchio in Seven Minutes":
  • Lily’s reaction to hearing "When You Wish Upon a Star".
    Lily: Wait a minute, this is the Disney introduction song. (sounding genuinely surprised) This is where it came from? Holy shit!
  • When Jiminy sees Pinocchio for the first time.
    Jiminy Cricket: Good piece of wood, too.
    Lily: D-Do I say Giggity?
  • When Jiminy shows an attraction to the Blue Fairy, all Lily can say is, "Sketchy, is that you?"
    • Then this moment:
      Blue Fairy: Would you like to be Pinocchio’s Conscience?
      Jiminy Cricket: (blushes) Well…
      Lily: Blushing because an older woman batted her eyelashes at you—Yep, this is Sketchy.
  • At the "I've Got No Strings" scene:
    Lily: I can't unhear Ultron singing this.
  • Lily's idea of An Aesop upon seeing what happens to the boys at Pleasure Island:
    Lily: Remember, boys and girls; if you're bad, you will be abducted and sold into slavery!
• "Alice in Wonderland in Five Minutes":
  • Lily's growing (but completely justified) horror at the "Walrus and the Carpenter" scene.
    Lily: THIS IS THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I'VE SEEN IN A DISNEY MOVIE! THEY'RE LITTLE SHELL BABUS THAT YOU STOLE FROM THEIR OYSTER MAMA! […] DISNEY, YOU ARE A FUCKING MONSTER!
• "The Sword in the Stone in Five Minutes":
  • Lily comes to a realization upon learning that Merlin can Time Travel.
    Lily: …You're the one who taught Xehanort how to do it, you fuck.
• "The Aristocats in Eight Minutes":
  • This moment:
    Shun Gon: Oh boy, ferras! Let's rock the joint!
    Lily and Sketchy: Oh no. Oh, I've got a bad feeling about this.
    (Shun Gon puts drum cymbal on his head like a straw hat)
    Lily and Sketchy: OH NOOOOOOOOOOOO.
  • This. Just this.
    Duchess: (singing) If you want to turn me on~
    Sketchy: Bitch, WHAT?!
    Billy: She's like Mom on a good day!
    Lily: …Excuse me, young man?
    Sketchy: Hey, that's your son.
  • Sketchy idolizing Thomas O' Malley for his smoothness towards Duchess, and spends the whole video rooting for them to get together, ultimately culminating in:
    Sketchy: He did it, everyone! Our boy did it! Thomas finally got himself some—
    Lily: Don't say it.
    (Beat)
    Sketchy: He got some PUS—
• "The Great Mouse Detective in Five Minutes":
  • This bit with Fidget's introduction as he heads to the Flaversham home.
    Lily: I am the terror that walks in the night. I am… Batman! Wait, no, that's Darkwing Du—, FU—!
  • Lily calling Ratigan "Basil's Evil Ex".
  • Her blunt response to the "Let Me be Good to You" scene.
    Lily: Somebody really wanted to fuck that mouse.
  • This moment.
    Basil: No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have. And I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
    Ratigan: (smiles calmly and closes his watch)
    Lily: (snerk) Okay, that was legit the greatest thing I've ever seen!
  • Her reaction to Basil managing to escape Ratigan's Rube Goldberg Hates Your Guts trap through Awesomeness by Analysis.
    Lily: Okay, I'm calling bullshit. That was some bullshit. It was fucking awesome bullshit, but it was still bullshit!
• "The Emperor's New Groove in Eight Minutes":
  • When Kuzco is shooting down potential wives:
    Sketchy: Age these girls up by about twenty or thirty years, and you basically have me.
    Lily: Oh that's not true. You're nowhere near this picky.
  • When Yzma is introduced:
    Lily: Well Sketchy, you got your wish.
    Sketchy: Ugh, I said add twenty years, not multiply twenty years.
    Lily: Man, you're shallow.
  • The exchange when Pacha returns home and Lily remembers all too late that Sketchy Likes Older Women.
    Lily: Awww, Pacha's going home to his adorable kids and his loving— oh no…
    Sketchy: (Evil Laugh) Where she at?!
  • “Yzma went from a royal bitch to an evil bastard.”
• "Treasure Planet in Ten Minutes":
  • Mikaila drooling over Captain Amelia. And being dispondant that she's both straight and a sub.
    Lily: (After Dilbert and Amelia's kids are revealed) Y'know Dilbert, this isn't quite what they meant when they said that going out into space will get you some- (SLAP) Ah! Mikaila, that really hurt! Do it again.
  • The numerous Star Trek jokes.
  • When Silver is having trouble working the map, it's joked that the ability to solve a Rubik's cube was one of the things he 'sacrificed chasing a dream'.
• "Tangled in Eleven Minutes":
  • Lily's Squee upon seeing baby Rapunzel.
  • Lily's salty Take That! towards Season 3 of Tangled: The Series.
    Lily: You just know that there are about a thousand people bemoaning the fact that Rapunzel fell in love with someone who was nice to her instead of someone who was cruel and abusive to her.
    Mikaila: You're still not over what they did to Cassandra, are you?
    Lily: No, I am not!
  • Lily making it seem like the movie ends with Eugene's death.

Hallo-Quaranteen

• "Coraline in 11 Minutes":
  • Lily, Ginger and Mikaila's reactions to the title sequence.
    Lily: Oh, this is so weirdly morbid.
    Ginger: We are a minute in, and we are starting out strong!
    Mikaila: (chuckles) I'm in danger.
  • This moment when Wybie explains the well to Coraline.
    Wybie: It's supposed to be so deep, that if you fell to the bottom and looked up, you'd see a sky full of stars in the middle of the day.
    Ginger: Well yeah, it's in the middle of a fucking Fairy ring!
    • This is brought up again when Coraline's parents are taken by the Beldam.
      Mikaila: Your life is cursed, Coraline.
      Ginger: This is what happens when you walk into a Fairy ring! Now the Fae got your parents!
  • Coraline's Dad's Big "NO!" after his computer crashes.
    Ginger: When you get disconnected right after you get Imposter.
  • Lily's reaction when Coraline dreams about mice coming out of the door to the Other World.^Explanation It reminds her too much of a mouse problem she had in her building.
    Lily: Oh my God, it's my worst nightmare. Percival's back with friends! You're dead, I killed you!

Glass of Water

• "An Open Letter to Tommy Oliver" starts off with the regular intro, but only one sentence is said throughout the entire video, and then ends. That sentence being...
  NARRATIVE IS NOT A NOUN!
• Revenge of the Clop Drawer closes on Lily going on a full shipping rant about Magneto and Professor X that plays over the credits. This is repeated in Cold Blooded Killer as she rants over the credits about how the Star Wars Prequels are over-hated.
• The stinger for Seventy Times Seven.
  "The point of today's video is that I'm a professional and that... I'm right about Starlight and you're not because fuck you. Now gimme money!"
• The moment in Light's Wrath where Lily realizes that the episode failed to do the one thing it said it would do.
  "Although considering that this is Starlight's dream and not Celestia's, maybe shamelessly ripping crappy fan designs was-ACTUALLY WAIT A MINUTE THIS IS STARLIGHT'S DREAM! SO THIS ISN'T EVEN A REFLECTION ON CELESTIA, IT'S MORE OF A REFLECTION ON STARLIGHT'S PARANOIA OF FAILING!"
• While probably unintentional, the length of certain videos can be entertaining.
  • Salt and Sanctimony's duration is 13:37.
  • All Hail Dark Mother's duration is 12:34
• In Top 5 of Season 7, Lily's 3rd Best slot is mostly taken up by ranting about how Hasbro is aggressively pushing Starlight in everyone's faces. Then this happens.
  Hasbro: Sorry! Would twenty minutes of Flurry Heart babbling at the camera help you stomach our distasteful attitude?"
  Lily: "Yes! ...You fucking pricks."
• In a meta sense, Kaboom. The first glimpse anyone got of it was in a mashup video where the thumbnail was shown. Simply by the title many people thought it would be a video about Josh Scorcher in a similar vein to Horse Famous and An Artist Meltdown Story. Lily did not say a single word about it for months and the episode finally went up on April Fools Day. It was about clowns.
• While discussing Little Witch Academia, Lily says that while she's not a fan of Japanese cartoons, she does think they do one thing well. Billy enters, leading to this exchange.
  Billy: Pornography?
  (long Beat where Lily gives Billy a Death Glare)
  Lily: Comedy.
• "Joyful Energy" is Lily spending twelve minutes gushing about how much she likes Kingdom Hearts. She includes a cutscene from Kingdom Hearts III where Woody from Toy Story tells Young Xehanort to "put Buzz back the way he was, then get lost." The video pauses to play the Final Fantasy victory fanfare, complete with a caption in all caps:
  WOODY TELLING A DUMB ANIME KID TO TAKE HIS BROODING BULLSHIT ELSEWHERE IS THE BEST THING EVER I'LL FUCKING FIGHT YOU.
• In Disc Horse where Lily rants about how the concept of friendship in Friendship is Magic slowly went from something you actively work on to an abstract concept you have to "believe in."
  Twilight: Friendship didn't fail me...I failed friendship.
  Lily (in distance): What the fuck does that mean you mashed potato!?
• From Lily's "Top Ten Best/Worst/Blandest Episodes of MLP" when she talks about "Stranger Than Fan-Fiction":
  Lily: Well, to be perfectly honest, in my humble opinion, of course, without offending anyone who thinks differently from my point of view, but also by looking into the matter in a different perspective, and without being condemning of one's view, and by trying to make it objective, and by considering each and everyone's valid opinion, I honestly believe that I completely forgot what I was gonna say.
  • In the Worst video she notes this about the CMC looking at the YouTube comments in Equestria Girls:
  Lily: I find the movie is too eager to shove as many background ponies and fan favourite characters in for pointless cameos, especially this one bit with the Cutie Mark Crusaders reading YouTube comments. Come on, we all know this isn't an accurate depiction of a YouTube video about the CMC because if it was the comments will be filled with Bronies who claim how much they want—
  (she gets cut off by static, it is then replaced with a black-and-white image of Firebrand glaring at her OC which makes an "Oh, Crap!" Smile in response)
  Textbox: Lily took it too far. We'll be back in one moment.
• The opening of "Finally! Some Good Freaking Cartoon Gays!", where she starts off sounding professional, and then promptly goes into adorable, near-incoherent squees over the first half of Season 2 of The Owl House, particularly its positive LGBT+ representation.
  Lily: Okay, so we have a lot of stuff to go through today, so in case you’re worried I’m about to rain on your parade or make you see something problematic you missed and ruin everything, the TLDR of today’s video is (does the vocal equivalent of a keyboard smash) IT’S SO CUTE! (more vocal equivalents to keyboard smashing and happy giggling) PERFECT BARD ENBY! (is absolutely drunk with happiness) STEP ON ME, OWL LADY! (babble laughs happily)

Other

• Tangled + SuperButterBuns Mashup. Especially the end bit:
  Gothel: Hi! My name's Catrina!
  King Frederic: And my name is Hugh!
  Lady Caine: I'm Sarah!
  Sugarby: I'm Emma!
  Varian: And I'm Joe to you!
• During a review of the first two episodes of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, every time Lily says the word "horde," the video Smash Cuts to Sylvanas Windrunner screaming "For the Horde!" Lily justified it in 2019 by saying that Sylvanas is one of her favorite characters ever.
  Lily: That's the best thing ever, and I will fucking fight you.
• During her "First Impressions" video on Hazbin Hotel, Lily starts off by noting how much she likes the concept before even the opening credits.
  Lily: It's a bunch of gay princesses saying the "fuck" word!
• "I Played Final Fantasy XIV for 2 Hours and It Was Fine" sees Lily give comparisons between the titular game and World of Warcraft, but also features some "tomfoolery" from Lily in the early stages of the game.
  • At first, Lily thinks about not playing XIV, until she learns that it's a Final Fantasy game where you can skip the cutscenes. She immediately declares "shut up and take my money!"
  • Lily attempts to leave the starting city of Limsa Lominsa early, but can't because the game won't let her skip the tutorial. Eventually, she resorts to stalling because "I've not matured past the age of nine, and I think a computer program can get annoyed into letting me off the rails".
  • Lily tries to find a grotto to advance the story, but she can't find it. Eventually, after 35 minutes of looking, she realizes that a cave she walked past six times is where she was supposed to go.