A young anthropologist who works as a curator at a museum in the Twin Cities, Monica is often hesitant to believe in the supernatural despite the fact that it surrounds her. She has spent some time just this side of a rubber room due to her experiences. On a lighter note, she is a bit of an audio snob and is a huge fan of 80's music. She is also one of the most powerful human beings on Earth, having been taught the language of magic by Mayahuel as a child (in the guise of her grandmother), and is known to the supernaturals of North America at least as the Demon Shepherd. And has recently added a phoenix-like ability to return from extremely violent death unscathed, and the as-yet-not-precisely-explained power of the "Jaguar Girl" to her resume.
- Adventure Archaeologist: She is quite vocal in her statements that she is not one.
- Artistic License Biology: Averted, surprisingly enough. Her short stature, ridiculously large bust, and equally large tongue are all clear symptoms of overproduction of/oversensitivity to estrogen.
- Big Eater: She can tend towards this at times.
- Bi the Way
- Dark-Skinned Redhead: While it isn't apparent in the comic itself, due to being in black and white, the color art demonstrates that she fits due to her Mexican and Irish ancestry.
- Gag Boobs: Done surprisingly tastefully for a Webcomic. Monica often gripes about it, and her height makes it even more apparent.
- Hot Scientist
- Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: With Kevin. He seems to be just over 6' tall, and she is 4'10".
- Informed Loner: In some of the earlier strips, she is convinced that she has no social life. When she gets to know Katherine, she realizes how wrong she is.
- In Harm's Way
- The Klutz
- Must Have Caffeine: In her own words: "I don't process fruit loop before coffee."
- Overly Long Tongue
- Spicy Latina
- The Unfettered: It is explicitly stated that Monica has sociopathic tendencies, but she isn't completely removed from human emotion.
- Weirdness Magnet
A tough tomboy who plays bass in the local band "Fermented Banana" and worked at her father's auto shop until she decided to become a personal trainer. She is proud of her Comanche heritage and has always had a hard time getting over her mother's death, both of which contributed to her problematic vision quest. She is Monica's best friend and enjoys innocently picking on her. Recently revealed to be a human/sphinx/titan hybrid and Phix's granddaughter.
- Bare Your Midriff: She wears very few outfits that don't do this.
- Batter Up!: Keeps a baseball bat in her car trunk, and seems to take one with her to answer the door late at night.
- Bi the Way: Not outright stated, but strongly implied during the arc with Heather.
- Creepy Good: Her conscience tends to appear as a creepy little girl, so even though she is unambiguously good, she tends to frighten people encountering her for the first time.
- Cute Bruiser
- Half-Human Hybrid: she's human/sphinx on her father's side and human/titan on her mother's side, the exact proportions are not specified.
- Hard Head: She takes a bowling ball to the skull during the Heather arc. She does spend some time in the hospital, and the injury is treated seriously, but she suffers no permanent injury.
- Important Haircut: After her mother died, she cut off most of her hair because it reminded her of her mother. Later, she repeated the gesture when she decided to put all chance of a romantic involvement with Owen behind her.
- Missing Mom: Her Mother's death marked her deeply. She was not happy to learn her mother faked it.
- Tsundere: She acted as a type B towards Owen, but she seems to have grown out of it.
- Unlucky Childhood Friend: To Owen
- Unstoppable Rage: Once threw a V-8 engine across the garage when having a jealous snit over Owen.
- Vision Quest: She went on one after her mom died. She got more than she bargained for.
- Will They Or Won't They: First with Owen, and later with Heather. Didn't either time.
- Wrench Wench: Although this aspect has been pushed into the background as the series progressed
A professional photographer and another close friend of Monica's, Amanda tends to think of her friend as a younger sister she has to protect. She is a bit more cynical than the rest of the cast, but is still friendly if she isn't too convinced that you're an idiot. It took a long time for Monica to introduce her to the paranormal weirdness in her life.
- Deadpan Snarker: Almost obligatory as the cynical member of the cast.
- Kindhearted Cat Lover: Taking in a stray cat is the start of her becoming less cynical.
Katherine is a coworker of Monica's and a bit of a shut-in. Monica let her in on the supernatural weirdness rather early on. She's in her mid-40s, and therefore quite a bit older than the rest of the (human) cast, though she doesn't really look it. She also has an extraordinarily weird backstory that not even she knows at first.
- Action Girl: Who knew?
- It turns out that as a graduate student, she was the lone survivor of an aerial attack on a dig near the Dead Sea in the early 1990s, which may have been what caused her to become such an introvert.
- It also turns out that Katherine is actually a composite — a literal, real-world biological chimera — of six different Anasazi children that had been kept in suspended animation for who knows how long by who knows who. Although she was found as an infant in 1970, she is much, much older.
- Adorkable: Really, really wants to have friends. Just...has no idea how to deal with people.
- Adventure Archaeologist: Though far from voluntarily.
- Dark Is Not Evil: Looks like a younger Morticia Addams, dresses all in black, collects spiders and has a Slasher Smile but is really just shy and quite nice.
- Jumped at the Call: She was quite excited when Monica revealed the kind of things she had been doing.
- Eerie Pale-Skinned Brunette: Averted; though she looks like one in the black and white drawings Taylor favors, Word of God (and the odd color picture of her) shows her to actually have relatively dark, Mediterranean skin.
- Promotion to Parent: of Atsali and Castela.
- Shameless Fanservice Girl: While little is made out of it due to her status as a secondary character, Katherine is a nudist who spends her evenings arguing with her pet fish, Oscar, while nude. Part of her introduction involves her explaining this to Monica, to boot. Most shots of her providing exposition in her apartment involve loads of Scenery Censor.
- Talking to Plants: Although she doesn't talk to people much.
- She still does it today considering that her youngest daughter is a sentient plant girl.
Originally introduced in the form of a trio of drunk college girls, they eventually sobered up, developed into complex characters, and played an important role in the plot. Thousands of years before the start of the comic, they were tortured, murdered, and turned into a chimera in hopes of creating the ultimate weapon. As anyone can guess, their masters lost control, and they destroyed most of the world. They were eventually separated, and used as guardians. At present they are trying to learn how to be human again.
Acacia (Bud) Budur
Bud is the most impulsive of the Golem Girls. She appears as a young woman of Greek descent, though she can also take the form of a strange looking goat. She has simple tastes, a green thumb, and seems to be the most successful of the group at regaining her humanity. She also seems to be remarkably good a thinking on her feet.
- Cute Little Fangs
- Exposed to the Elements: A snowfall means she gets the beach all to herself!
- Farmer's Daughter: She constantly refers to herself as the Greek equivalent of this.
- Mundane Luxury: She is quite excited when someone shows her kindness without fear or ulterior motives.
- Must Have Caffeine: She is capable of destroying the world and still needs her coffee. Of course, she needs the coffee so she doesn't destroy the world.
Brandilyn (Brandi) Oduya
Brandi is a motherly figure who wouldn't hurt a fly (literally). She can come across as a bit of a ditz, for example, she flushes a fly down the toilet because it would freeze if she released it outside, not realizing that it would drown, but she is arguably the smartest cast member. A surprising number of seeming coincidences were actually the result of her plans. She appears to be a young African woman, but can also take the form of a panther.
- The Chessmaster: She's actually the brains behind everything the girls do, up to and including RUNNING THE MEN IN BLACK. She's sealed most of her intellectual processing power because it caused her to become something even less human than a golem.
- Cute Little Fangs
- Deal with the Devil: Once upon a time, she attacked child killers. One of them used a baby as a meatshield faster than she could stop the polearm in her arms. In that moment, an ambitious succubus spoke and she agreed to every binding clause out of pure despair. Except it wasn't exactly a regular demon that she sold her soul to...
- Ditzy Genius
- Team Mom for the Wapsiverse's entire Men in Black organization.
Jin tends to act as the leader of the Golem Girls, mostly because she tends to know most of what's going on. She is the one primarily responsible for dealing with the calender machine due to witnessing her mother get ripped out of existence by it, and being aware of each repetition of the "Groundhog Day" Loop. She seems to be struggling with her sanity.
- Cute Little Fangs
- Death Seeker: She's completely suicidal, but can't die. It's not pretty.
- Now that she's human and can die again, she seems to be regaining her sanity and enjoying life again.
- Good Is Not Nice: Her primary goal is to save the world, and she generally has the best interests of everyone involved, but she is more than willing to piss people off to meet her goals.
- I Want My Beloved to Be Happy: To Monica's grandfather, with the added twist that if she didn't let him go, Monica would never exist to be the focal point of the ritual to destroy the calendar machine. Made substantially worse by the fact that he was the love of her life and she's had to let him go every time she relives the cycle.
- Sanity Slippage
- Time Abyss: She was thousands of years old before the "Groundhog Day" Loop. All of the time is starting to get to her.
- Who Wants to Live Forever?: An immortal Death Seeker is not a pretty thing.
- Is now mortal, and tried to test it with an old flintlock. Bud saved her, but broke her nose and several ribs in the process.
Other Supernatural Beings
Tepoz, as he is often called, is the Aztec god of alcohol, or at least that is how he is known. He is actually much older than the Aztecs and a simple golem rather than a god. He does however have control over anything containing alcohol. He is roughly three feet tall and blue, so a bit of a Smurf look-alike. He is well-intentioned, but not the most competent of characters.
- Deadpan Snarker
- Demoted to Extra: Rarely shows up anymore
- God Guise: he certainly wasn't an actual deity.
- Put on a Bus: He was quite literally put on a bus to Utah after his first appearance. He came back.
- Suddenly Sober: He can invoke this
- The Omnipotent: As long as something contains alcohol. Oh, and he can summon/create alcohol and things containing alcohol.
Tina Rosario Aldaco Guzman
Tina is a collection of personal demons occupying a partially living body, as well as the owner of the best coffee shop in the Twin Cities. The original Tina died in a car crash, so the demons took control of the body, got up, and walked out of the morgue. She uses the coffee shop as an opportunity to pump people full of positive wisdom and sunshine, and she generally has good intentions.
- Aura Vision: She can read peoples auras, and finds it much easier than dealing with body language or facial expressions.
- Cute Little Fangs
- Iconic Item: She is never seen without her choker, which once led Monica to speculate that it kept her head on.
- Many Spirits Inside of One: She is, in fact, a collection of demons
- Parallel Parking: She sucks at it. She ran over her wrist last time she tried.
- StockYuck.Anchovies: She does not like anchovies!
- Talking to Themself: She even argues about pizza toppings.
- You Can't Go Home Again: Tina knows of her human past only through newspaper clippings. Once upon a time, she was a psychologist and one of Jin's very best friends. Demon Tina has no knowledge of this and shows no recognition when Jin asks her about one of her former favorite things.
Phix is a sphinx. Specifically, the sphinx that appears in the Oedipus story. At the start of the story, she was the librarian at the Bibliothiki. She is about as intimidating as one would expect a sphinx to be, but is surprisingly friendly if you get to know her. She's also Shelly's paternal grandmother on her human/sphinx side.
- Ancient Keeper: Of the Bibliothiki
- Hot Librarian: Many people think she pulls off the look, especially in her human form.
- Irony: She was persecuted on the first day of her demon hunting job for killing possessed humans - which her predecessors did and she abhorred.
- Magic Librarian: She is a sphinx.
- MayflyDecember Romance: She is dating Monica's boss whose short lifespan will be a brief blip compared to her own.
- My Species Doth Protest Too Much: Phix is the only sphinx who is against killing humans infected with rogue demons by means of riddle.
- Riddle of the Sphinx: She tends to ask people riddles when they first come to the library. She won't kill them if they get it wrong, though.
- The riddle she asks is always the same and has no wrong answer to it. The reason why she asks it is because the answer one gives provides insight into their personality.
- Sleep Mask: A sphinx in a sleep mask is hilarious.
- Spot of Tea: Though she is not British, being older than Britain, She does have a British accent when speaking English (Word of God says she was inspired by Alex Kingston) and she tends to use British slang. Her tea of choice seems to be Earl Gray.
- Statuesque Stunner: In her human form, she is one of the few Hot Librarians over six feet in height.
- Voluntary Shapeshifting: She can take human form. Said form is roughly 6'4", so it doesn't make her look much less imposing.
Nudge is a mythical trickster like Loki or Coyote who has pissed off quite a few people. She was the original librarian before Phix, who she tricked into becoming her replacement. Since then she has been hiding from Phix who has been trying to return her to her place in the library, most recently hiding among the collection of demons known as Tina. At present, she and Phix are co-librarians.
- StockYuck.Anchovies: She actually likes anchovies on her pizza!
- Trickster Archetype
- Trickster Mentor: She sees herself as one of these. She tries to put her trickster tendencies to use for good, but still manages to make many enemies because people don't like being messed with.
- Why Did It Have To Be Lava: Normally of course not wanting to be dropped into red hot lava is a perfectly rational fear but since Nudge is a demon to her it's much like a cat's fear of water.
BiaBia is a titan with a reputation for being a "thoughtless emotionless bitch." She's also Shelly's maternal great grandmother and mother on her human/titan side.
- Dysfunction Junction: refers to herself as the "dysfunctional one"
- Faking the Dead: To "help make [Shelly] strong."
- Missing Mom: Shelly's
Apparently Nudge's little sister. She is a living shadow who can manifest as something like a teenage version of Nudge. Not a lot is known about her, but she is in school and comes and goes from the Bibliothiki as she pleases. She has recently gotten a job (internship?) at M.I.B.
Along with Medusa and Stheno, Euryale was one of the gorgons from the original myth. Despite what the myth said, she's hardly a monster and is quite friendly. She works as a marine biologist, taking advantage of her ability to breath underwater. For whatever reason she speaks with a southern accent. She has been following Monica's adventures through some unknown source, and thinks of her as a hero of some sort.
- Ascended Fangirl: As stated, she looks up to Monica and is quite excited to meet her hero.
- Funetik Aksent: Her southern accent is rendered this way.
- Genki Girl: The genkiest.
- Gorgeous Gorgon
- Statuesque Stunner: She is rather tall. Tina even refers to her as statuesque, although she might have been going for the double meaning.
- Taken for Granite: She actually turns people to ice. It's voluntary, although she does tend to do it when startled. Fortunately, she can reverse the process by kissing the victim.
Pratt and McBride
A couple of vampires who work for the FBI. They know of Monica as the "demon shepherd" and are utterly gobsmacked to see her one day (surrounded by an entourage of very intimidating demons). They're then recruited by Brandi for the MIB.
- Our Vampires Are Different: Wapsiverse vampires are created, at least in part, by being forgotten by society, and seem to have no issues with daylight.
The sensible one of the two; their superiors charge her with keeping Mc Bride in line. She is of Anasazi descent. Although it's a bit confusing, in her human life, she seems to have been one of Katherine's biological mothers. It's really complicated.
McBride is a constant headache to both her partner and her superiors, by virtue of some pretty serious impulse control problems when it comes to feeding.
- The Atoner: Despite her bizarre and inhuman behavior, she has a strong sense of compassion towards society's forgotten; she gets a lot of her food from the coroner's office, and then makes a point of giving her "victims" a proper burial, complete with gravestone.
Atsali is a young, orphaned siren who becomes Katherine's sidekick and then adopted daughter after they meet in the Bibliothiki. After her and Castela's adoption by Katherine, she starts to replace Monica as the primary protagonist of the strip.
- Acrophobic Bird: She's first seen in Siren form and later reveals a fear of heights.
- Bi the Way: Admits to being attracted to both boys and girls.
- Enthralling Siren: She can be when she wants to.
- Gag Boobs: Painfully deconstructed. Atsali's breasts are possibly even bigger than Monica's, and she's very sensitive to the stereotype of sirens as sexual predators, mirroring many of the daily issues faced by real-life busty teenagers.
- Genki Girl: So very much so. Then again, she's only sixteen.
- Jumped at the Call
- No-Sell: It turns out that her Enthralling Siren abilities are ineffective on people who truly care about her.
- Oblivious to Love: Oh, poor Nadette...
- Turns out, the reason she's so oblivious to Nadette's affection is that she suffers from Social-Emotional Agnosia - an inability to recognize or understand facial expressions (with Castela being the only one she's able to read). It does get through her skull after a while, and they eventually start dating.
- Remembered I Could Fly
Atsali's young friend and later adopted sister from the orphanage. She appears to be made primarily of tightly woven vines and is too young to know how to pass for human.
- Cute Monster Girl Of Kryptonite: The plants she is made of? They are the Kryptonite Factor of The Fair Folk, who are otherwise some of the most powerful paranormal entities, standing below Elementals.
- Ugly Cute
Nadette and Berdine
A pair of ursamorph (basically, werebear) twins from somewhere down South, recently moved to Minneapolis. They become Atsali's first friends in her new school, assuming the forms of slightly gothy human girls.
- Schoolgirl Lesbian: Nadette has a painfully obvious crush on Atsali, who consistently fails to notice. Atsali eventually figures it out, with a lot of help, and they start dating.
A house spider friend of Dietzel who accidentally turned human when playing with a magical talisman meant to enlarge back Dietzel. She cannot be turned back to her original spider form because of the unpredictability of the magic involved and must now learn to be human.
Jacqui is a friend of Monica's who plays drums in the local band "Fermented Banana." She is best described as "A daisy on Prozac." Originally, she was going to college to become a veterinarian, but she eventually dropped out and opened a yoga studio using money she inherited from her aunt.
- Demoted to Extra: She was much more important before the paranormal elements of the strip showed up. However, she does have the most appearances of any character who is not in on the paranormal.
- Genki Girl: She is quite energetic and absurdly cheerful.
Owen is a childhood friend of Shelly's and the lead guitarist in the band "Fermented Banana." There was a bit of romantic tension between them, but it never amounted to anything, and he is currently married a woman named Lakshmi.
- Demoted to Extra: After the situation between him and Shelly was resolved, he stopped appearing. In March 2012, Shelly got a postcard announcing that Owen and Lakshmi had eloped.
- Tiny Guy, Huge Girl: Lakshmi is at least a foot taller than him.
- Will They or Won't They?: With Shelly. They didn't.
Monica's pet dog Dietzel is smarter than a dog has any right to be, although Monica seems to be unaware of this fact. He refuses to try to catch frisbees due to taking a few too many to the face, and isn't particularly fond of squirrels. He also has an interesting relationship with a certain pizza girl.
- Intellectual Animal: He doesn't talk, but he definitely is aware of what's going on. He also likes Mythbusters
- Silent Snarker: He is the only character so far to use the Face Palm.
- StockYuck.Anchovies: Even the dog doesn't like anchovies.
- Timmy in a Well: He does not think this is funny.
Darren owns the bar that the cast used to frequent earlier in the strip, but it has become a less important location as the comic went on. He used to be an elementary school teacher, and doesn't feel that being a bartender is much different. He seems to care about his regulars quite a bit.
- Demoted to Extra: He isn't quite as important as he used to be.
- Local Hangout: He runs the place.
- Real Men Wear Pink: While none can doubt his manliness, when he is watching Dietzel, we discover that he likes romantic movies.
- Team Dad: He played this role early in the strip's run. In fact, his introduction described him as "A den-mother to us all."
Kevin is a local photographer and Monica's boyfriend. He is socially inept in an endearing way, and is remarkably accepting of the strange occurrences that seem to surround Monica. His job sometimes results in his disappearing for extended periods of time on assignment.
- Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: He seems to be just over six feet tall, but Monica is particularly tiny.
- Put on a Bus: He spent a reasonable amount of the story on assignment. There was never any doubt that he would come back, but he wasn't around.
- Understanding Boyfriend
Alan is Kevin's best friend and Jin's boyfriend. Despite his goofy nature, he is capable of remarkable wisdom, as he demonstrated when he first met Jin. His occupation has yet to be revealed.
- Understanding Boyfriend: He knows what Jin is, and is still dating her.
AKA "Officer Tight Buns", Justin is a Minneapolis policeman and Shelly's current boyfriend. He's almost too much of a boyscout for his own good, but hides a very, very strange secret.
- Chew Toy: literally, it seems...
- Everyone Can See It: an unusually low-key example, in that he doesn't realize that both Shelly and his squad commander knew he had a thing for her, and the entire storyline evidently picks up in medias res. (Their initial hookup was arranged with the help of said squad commander and waaaaay too much charcoal lighter fluid.)
- Head-Tiltingly Kinky: Major deconstruction. Justin is rather vanilla...
- Healing Factor: ...however, most of his ex-girlfriends are not, and love him for this, because they can literally tear him to shreds and he'll be fine almost immediately. He really, really does not enjoy this. It turns out that Justin is actually Epimetheus, the brother of Prometheus, the fire-bringer. However, after serving as a cop in Italy, he was severely injured to the point where his original identity was completely wiped; as far as he knows, he's just an ordinary Minneapolis police officer, albeit one who's essentially immune to gunshot wounds.
- Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: It's not exactly clear how tall Justin is, but Shelly isn't especially short, and he towers over her.
- Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Justin kind of looks like a taller Owen without the muttonchops.
- Understanding Boyfriend: Almost averted. He does not take the revelation of Shelly's true nature well. You wouldn't either if you'd been a chew toy for a string of supernatural women with major issues, and then your current relatively normal girlfriend tears you open with a reflexive claw swipe out of nowhere. He gets better, though.
- Weirdness Magnet: His kinky ex, the werewolf girl who liked to be tied down so he could have sex with her while she transformed. And she's just one of many examples.