> Respond to the story's events.
Homestuck is a work of over 8000 pages, and the audience has been along for quite a ride. These tropes include some of the many reactions.
You cannot hope to defeat Homestuck in a wham-off. It is simply the best there is. We are all completely blown away by these stunning revelations.
Most works get one or two wham episodes to set the tone, or shock the fanbase. Homestuck had so many that it was the first TV Tropes page to have its own subpage. That does not stop any wham episode from being any less wham-y.
- The Webcomic series Homestuck first seemed like a lighthearted Affectionate Parody of Sim-type games. Then the main character's house gets hit by a meteor, and the plot gets started.
- The meteor's first appearance itself is something of a Wham Episode, given that it comes out of nowhere and it's on a collision course with John's house.
- John's first chat with Nannasprite, when she casually reveals that his mission is not to Save the World because the Earth is doomed to destruction and there's nothing John can do about it.
- [S] WV: Ascend, reveals that the ruins WV is in is actually Earth years in the future (but not many).
- Parodied with [S] John: Examine your dad's room. The reveal that John's dad has a boringly normal room and profession shocks him, but the audience is underwhelmed.
- Shortly after, this tropes is parodied again (and then subverted) when John realizes that Betty Crocker made his favorite snack, Fruit Gushers. He starts having a mental breakdown, but stops when he realizes that it's a stupid thing to get upset over.
- Played with even more on. We learn that this is actually an incredibly reasonable thing to be upset about, but for completely different reasons than what John was thinking.
- [S] Jade: Retrieve package. The first appearance of Becquerel, who is not a normal dog.
- [S] Enter, where Dave installs his server copy, Rose creates Jaspersprite and enters the Medium. Right after the animation, we see that John's entrance to the Medium ended up creating a planet.
- This update and the pages following it, right up to the end of the intermission, which reveal that the events of the intermission are canon after all, Spades Slick and presumably the other members of the Midnight Crew are exiles like WV, PM and AR, and marks the first physical appearance of one of the trolls — who, as we finally see, are aliens.
- The Flash Forward in Act 4 to a Bad Future where John and Jade are dead and the game is now Unwinnable without them.
- Jack: Ascend. It's revealed that what was written on Rose's wall is a code that in turn translates to a DNA sequence. Jack meanwhile gets sick of the Black Queen forcing him into silly outfits, and uses Jade's gift to kill her and take her ring for himself.
- [S] Descend, Jack kills everyone in the Battlefield and starts The Reckoning, Bec is created using the DNA code from Rose's walls, Jack destroys Prospit and sends its moon on a collision course with Skaia, dream Jade manages to wake up dream John in the nick of time but dies herself, and Rose blows up her gate.
Act 5 Act 1:
- The 07/20/10 update, a.k.a. the last update before a week-long hiatus, a.k.a. the THE GREAT ROBOSMOOCH OF 2011 update, was explicitly meant to be this (and was an overwhelming success):And now that you have all been sufficiently nonplussed... See you in a week! I'll be back on the 27th.
- Karkat essentially taking a Blood Oath with Jack Noir.
- [S] Make her pay. Vriska mindcontrols Terezi via dual-proxy into staring into the sun until she goes blind. Much later, Aradia finds Vriska on LOMAT and brutally maims her, her imminent death only postponed by Aradia's abscondment.
- The series of updates starting with Aradia: Skip to the End.
- The true enormity and weight of the purpose of Sburb/Sgrub are smashed into the readers face with the force of a ton of bricks with the simple words "...int0 the universe we created"
- And then it turns out this is only Act 5 Act 1.
Act 5 Act 2:
- [S] Jade: Enter: Vriska puts John to sleep at a crucial moment, Bec prototypes himself in order to save Jade, then blows up the meteor heading towards her island (while unintentionally killing everybody else on Earth with the aftershock), Jade enters the medium, Jack Noir obtains Bec's powers and kills Bro and severely wounds Davesprite, it's revealed that the demon terrorizing the troll's session is Bec Noir, having crossed the universes through the Scratch, and destroyed their version of Prospit.
- Thief: tear into Page and everything that follows, as Vriska reveals she is responsible for the creation of Bec Noir.
- John takes his legendary nap. Which immediately gets him killed by Bec Noir, leading to his ascension to God Tier.
- [S] John: Rise Up in its entity. It begins with John dying and a tearful WV entering the titular command as he begs John to Please Wake Up... then proceeds to his resurrection and ascension to the God Tiers. And then we zoom back out to see that, from WV's perspective, John is still dead, with his screen shifting to an ominous view of Bec Noir glaring straight at him through the screen before it fades to static.
- [S]: Wake. It's revealed that Aradia does have a dreamself, sleeping on a Quest Bed in the core of Derse, and her soulbot exploding was a result of her ascending to God Tiers. About an hour later (in-universe time), Tavros finally challenges Vriska and she kills him.
- Kanaya chatting with Jade, informing her Bilious Slick, the Genesis Frog Jade must breed, literally is the new universe- and that by extension, the troll version of Bilious Slick was the kids' universe.
- The series of updates starting with Kanaya: Return to the core. Eridan reveals that he's joining Jack Noir, then proceeds to blind Sollux with "science", kill Feferi, doom the troll race to extinction, and then kill Kanaya. Gamzee goes on a killing spree, taking out Equius and Nepeta.
- The Scratch, long thought to be a dimensional rift that could be used to banish Jack Noir, is revealed to actually be a temporal Reset Button. And if the kids don't find some way to escape their session, they'll all be erased as well.
- Rose's Grimdark transformation. It was given some foreshadowing, but not enough to keep it from being this trope.
- Rose takes John back to find their parents' bodies and to battle Jack Noir. Jack Noir kills John again. Rose does not take this well and blows everything up.
- This series of updates, where Karkat reveals that the reason why the kids session is barren is due to a flaw inherent to their universe. This was due to a mistake he made while creating said universe. The continuation count as well, as it's revealed that Jack only killed the trolls to prevent them from banishing him as well, and that his true target was Bilious Slick.
- Gamzee revealing that he created Lil' Cal and paved the way for Jack Noir's rise.
- This update shows the trolls' session is actually the second session their world has been through. The original session was played by the pre-scratch versions of the ancestors of "our" trolls, and "our" trolls take on the roles that the pre-scratch versions of their ancestors had. Alternia was also vastly different, with trolls being a peaceful race. When the original twelve players (our trolls pre-scratch ancestors) were unable to win, unknowingly due to a glitch where they weren't spawned in their own session, they struck a deal and scratched their universe, in exchange for the players being properly prepared for the next game. Doc Scratch came into play to uphold this bargain, and manipulated Alternia into becoming a Death World, and the troll species into becoming sociopathic warmongers. The roles of ancestors and players was reversed, with our trolls now playing and the original twelve being ancestors. To top it all off, one of the original twelve players, The Sufferer, somehow had visions of the original Alternia, which led to his attempted rebellion.
- For the EOA, [S] Cascade:
- Jack makes his trip from the Kids's session, to Earth, and finally into the Troll session, killing most of the Earth exiles along the way. He also badly maims WV by ripping the Uranium out of his stomach.
- PM ascends by putting on the Queen's Ring and chases Jack into the Troll Session, accompanied by Serenity and carrying WV's body.
- Spades Slick kills Snowman, resulting in the destruction of the Trolls' universe.
- Derse's moon floats in the Furthest Ring, unable to find the Green Sun. Dave and Rose find Quest Beds in the center of Derse's moon, and go God Tier when the Tumor explodes, creating the Green Sun.
- S u c k e r s .
- Jade ascends to her God Tiers, merging with Jadesprite in the process.
- Jade finds that her ascension grants her the ability to control the size of objects. She promptly uses this power to shrink down every planet in the kids' session, in effect packing up her entire session and taking it with her.
- Jade breaks out of the Medium by breaking the fourth wall, just as the session is Scratched.
- Sollux pilots the meteor the trolls are on, to the Green Sun, while blind, and then bleeds to death.
- Jack makes his trip from the Kids's session, to Earth, and finally into the Troll session, killing most of the Earth exiles along the way. He also badly maims WV by ripping the Uranium out of his stomach.
- Lord English bursts out of Scratch's puppet body, shattering his cueball and basically killing him in the process. A very good host indeed.
Act 6 Act 1:
- The post-Scratch universe is revealed. Meet Jane Crocker, whom you might know in another universe as Nanna Egbert and Grandpa Harley's counterpart, Jade's penpal. His name is Jake English.
- The introduction of uranianUmbra.
- Jake's dreamself is dead before the game even begins.
- [S] Jane: Get mail. In a moment doubling as Mood Whiplash, Jane reaches for the mail in her mailbox...and it explodes.
Act 6 Intermission 1:
- The fact that the trip to the new session will take three years for the protagonists is surprising.
Act 6 Act 2:
- Alpha Jack attempts to kill Jane's dreamself, under orders from the new Queen of Derse, who is actually Her Imperious Condescension. She's in the game.
- Jake blacks out and sees a blue girl. It's not who you think.
- There are Dersite exiles on Earth.
- Roxy couldn't have put it any better.
- Another Ophiuchus troll?
- [S] Jane: Enter. GCat sabotages the prototyping of Jane's kernelsprite, and her totem is revealed to be a tree bearing no fruit. Somehow she still enters the Medium with the unprototyped sprite, but before she disappears Jane sees that the meteor heading towards her house is actually the Battleship Condescension. A Time Skip reveals that years in the future (but not many), this Earth isn't ravaged by meteors, but instead completely flooded by oceans. Jane's town will be replaced by a series of red Condesce-style towers, while Jake's island will be mostly submerged and a new Gl'bgolyb is shown around the barely visible Frog Temple and volcano. Meanwhile a large amount of Imperial Crocker Drones are about to attack Roxy and Dirk on a city-sized sprawl of buildings and an isolated skyscraper rooftop, respectively. In other words, Roxy and Dirk have been living in the future all along.
Act 6 Intermission 2:
- Lord English appears behind the fourth wall. Oh, Crap!.
- Rose reveals the Alpha Session is not just null, it's void?
- And how far in the future are Dirk and Roxy? Try 400 years. Later revealed to be 411 years from Jane and Jake.
- In a dream bubble, Terezi speaks to Vriska...except she's not Vriska at all, But Pre-Scratch Mindfang, a God Tiered Sylph of Light. Also Alternia wasn't originally named Alternia - and it didn't have that green moon either.
- Oh my god, Andrew, no! NO! NOOOOOOOO! Wait, what?
Act 6 Act 3:
- Jane finally enters the game! Her planet is... Land of Crypts and Helium. All of her Salamander Consorts are dead, because she arrived MILLIONS of years late. Hemera, the only living thing left on the planet, instructed them to build their own crypts while they slowly died. The Alpha Kids are no longer "Heroes" to the Consorts, they're "Nobles" - something they associate with tragedy. The writing in the stone doesn't make the other Kids' survival prospects look good either. And then she meets God Tier Gamzee Makara. With Aradia's music box time machines. He prototypes her sprite with the dead bodies of Vriska and Tavros, creating the personality-confused merging that is Tavrisprite...who immediately explodes out of pure self-hatred.
- Pretty much everything following Jake: Regain consciousness. After falling unconscious, Jake relives a memory from his birthday where he spoke with Dirk. In the exposition laden conversation that follows:
- Dirk reveals to Jake that he and Roxy are from the future, that UU gave them the chat client that lets them contact Jane and Jake in the past, and that they are the last humans (as far as they know) on Earth in the future.
- The Condesce brought the Frightening Fauna to Earth, including the new Gl'bgolyb.
- Grandma English was killed by the Condesce, who then exploded her house. Jake found her body and cremated her, keeping the ashes.
- The Condesce was able to unlock her full psychic potential after years of experimentation, allowing her to use all of the troll psychic abilities seen in the comic so far.
- Grandma English purposely named herself after Lord English to insult the Condesce. The most surprising thing is that she seemed to know what English looks like.
- Post-Scratch Mom and Bro (Rose and Dave) knew Roxy and Dirk were coming in the future and set up their houses for them to live in. They then vanished after fighting Guy Fieri and the Insane Clown Posse; Fieri was responsible for the deaths of five billion people, while the ICP both became President Evil.
- And then the Condesce kills them both. With help from a mind-controlled GCat.
- Post-Scratch DD has the Black Queen's ring, and decides to put it on, while Eddie Morton's Midnight Crew plays in the background. Turns out that the Red Miles attack isn't exclusive to Bec Noir.
- Caliborn has killed Calliope's dreamself, with some help from Jack. Also, their version of Skaia is entirely blackened.
- Why do pre-Scratch trolls exist as ghosts when the Scratch should've wiped them out completely? Meenah blew them all up with their session's tumor, before their universe could reset.
- The Red Miles currently destroying the B2 universe? That's Jack Noir too. Every single version of the B universe is contained inside the Genesis Frog that Jack murdered at the Critical Moment.
- UU's reveal. So shocking that there is an author's note specifically asking not to reveal her true appearance, complete with a fake image. Her true name is Calliope, she is heavily implied to have a Split Personality with undyingUmbrage, she is the Muse of Space, she has been cosplaying as a troll this whole time, she is actually a Cherub (whatever that is), and she looks like a Fun Size Lord English. The last part pretty much broke the fandom.
- Calliope and her brother live on the Trolls and Kids' meteor. Also, the surface of the planet the meteor is on is covered in crappy jpeg Statues of Liberty, much like the ones that would be used in Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff. Oh, and just to top it off, their sun is a red super giant near its death.
- After several days without updates we get a character select screen...where Jane and Roxy suddenly die and Dirk and Jake get knocked unconscious. Also, Dirk couldn't kiss Jane's corpse before being knocked out and no-one could kiss Roxy, so their Dream Selves are screwed. And all this is narrated by undyingUmbrage, with a laugh like Lil' Cal and Doc Scratch.
- Just to ensure there is no ambiguity, we get this page. Yep, Roxy and Jane are definitely dead, and Dirk is definitely KO'd.
- The above situation is resolved when Dirk wakes up and Portal Cuts his own head. Which turns out to be a Thanatos Gambit Stable Time Loop that ends with Roxy, Dirk, and Jane being corpsesmooched and then meeting up with Jake on his island. Dirk's robots and Auto-Responder (now naming itself Lil' Hal) then send everyone into the Medium.
- [S] Caliborn: Enter. UndyingUmbrage- real name Caliborn- takes control of Calliope's body, unchains himself by ripping off his foot with his teeth, attaches a robotic leg and unveils his Cane-turned-Machine Gun weapon- the spitting image of Lord English, who is traveling through Paradox Space destroying dream bubbles and breaking reality on a small scale. To bring the HSQ to an all-time high for Homestuck (as if that didn't already happen on a regular basis), because the cherubs' cruxtruder releases both his and Calliope's kernelsprites at the same time, they self-prototype and create a black hole which sucks in his planet and the dying red sun, the latter in the splitting image of the symbol that's been haunting Calliope for years.
Act 6 Intermission 3:
- In Part 1 of the Intermission game:
- While the revelation that Caliborn will become Lord English isn't particularly shocking, the mentioning that Calliope is dead is. Furthermore, her soul lies within one of the Dreambubbles. English is coming for her.
- Also: Hussie is Only Mostly Dead, and was not killed in Lord English's dreambubble massacre.
- In Part 2 of the Intermission game, we get a lot more of Lord English's backstory all at once:
- (a) Cronus fought him with magic in his youth, forcing him to split his soul into several pieces, which are, presumably, Lil Cal and the Felt's Jujus.
- (b) Kurloz received such a nightmarish vision of Lord English that he accidentally deafened his matesprit, chewed out his tongue, sewed his mouth shut, and took a vow of silence until...
- (c) He received a codpiece in the dreambubbles from said matesprit, Meulin, after indoctrinating her their whole lives into his Cherub-worshipping cult, and then handed the codpiece over to his fellow servant, Gamzee, completing his quest to assemble the latter's signature attire.
- This also implies that Gamzee went Godtier before becoming marooned on the Troll Asteroid.
- Vriska and the Alpha-Timeline John finally meet face-to-face. On a lesser note, Tavros is planning to propose to Vriska.
- Then, Vriska reveals that she's been hunting down a weapon hidden in the Furthest Ring that could possibly take down Lord English. Maps within the Furthest Ring are normally incomprehensible, but it turns out that when Lord English started trashing the dream bubbles, it started causing things to appear on the map.
- In the third portion of the intermission game, Gamzee reveals that he's been in a blackrom relationship with Terezi and asks Rose not to tell Karkat or he'll want to kill him.
- On the anniversary of Alterniabound and Cascade, we have a kiss. Between Kanaya and Rose.
- And finally, intended for Halloween, but delayed by server downtime due to tropical storm Sandy, just about every single person in the dreambubble show up for a costume party and to watch Vriska and Meenah strife over who's plan gets the backing of an army of dreambubble ghosts.
- Also: John somehow managed to take Tavros's ring with him back to his realself. And it's glowing.
Act 6 Act 4:
- The Act's opening shows off Jake's planet (Land of Mounds and Xenon), Roxy's planet (Land of Pyramids and Neon), and Dirk's planet (Land of Tombs and Krypton). Then, the unexpected happens: the Act just ends.
Act 6 Intermission 4:
- The story shifts to Caliborn's perspective as he arrives on his barren planet. Shit just got real.
- Roxy tries contacting him in order to get Calliope back in control. Too bad it doesn't work.
- Gamzee shows up yet again on Caliborn's planet. How does Caliborn respond? He just shoots the shit out of Gamzee. To make things more suprising, Gamzee's God Tier wings fall off during the gunfire - signifying that his God Tier appearance was just a costume.
- And what was Gamzee attempting to be a guide for? It's a tower that appears to either produce or relay the narrative of MSPA.
- It turns out that Gamzee, at the moment, can't die because he's a clown. Gamzee then gives Caliborn an outlet to get things the viewport working, as well as Crowbar's crowbar. The one that can break Jujus. Uh-oh.
- And now we find that Caliborn's session is a dead session, which is even worse than the Alpha kids' void session.
- And he can fully observe the Alpha's void session despite the void blacking it out thanks to a special signal. By the end of the Intermission, he's ready to make contact with the Alpha Session's iteration of Jack Noir.
Act 6 Act 5 Act 1:
- GCat drops Roxy onto Derse following her attempt at involvement in one of the comic's worst romantic quandaries. Who's waiting for her there, smiling upon her unconscious body? Someone who should remind readers that she is a much greater problem for the Alpha session than teen angst: the Condesce.
- Serenity probably contains Calliope's soul, since Calliope now manifests in Roxy's dreams in the image of Serenity.
- In this dream, Calliope leads Roxy into not only her memories from her "own" universe, but also into her subconscious memories of being Mom in the preceding B1 universe.
- Calliope then appears to lead her outside of any known setting in Homestuck. Most of what is in this realm that isn't Roxy or Calliope appears as if it were drawn in paint and crayon, like in Calliope's art, since it is, in fact, a heavily isolated bubble influenced by Calliope's imagination. Though before she tells Roxy this, the reader just sees everything as an almost unprecedented Mind Screw.
- And Calliope's revelation to Roxy while in this bubble is enormous: She is not the ultimate anti-English weapon the troll army is looking for, and yet she is that weapon. That is, her doomed (though nigh omnipotent) self from an offshoot timeline is the weapon.
- Lil Cal winks. He winks. Why? Because, as Caliborn's description of his relationship with his new juju and best friend suggests, Cal will be, is, and has always been filled with Caliborn's soul.
- Jane fuses the jujus, and we get this. What.
- It gets...more unusual, even for Homestuck. Empowered in Trickster Mode, Jane dances enough energy to blast off from her planet. During launch, her Power Glows enough to Terra Form half of LOCAH from barren land to a lush jungle, KO's the undead enemies of the Void session - who were previously stated to be near invincible - into Zillium, and shoots Gamzee off into the distance. Finally, Act 6 Act 5 (Act 1) concludes, on page number 7...612.
Act 6 Act 5 Act 2:
- After her launch, Caliborn and Gamzee witness through the monitors Jane passing through an unfamiliar world. Using the Spiral Sucker Juju, Jane reduces Angels of Zillyhoo into Zillium grist, transmogrifies passing horrorterrors into Squiddles, and, what may be the most important part, changes black and white winged Cherubim, aka Calliope and Caliborn's species, into life-size Lil Cal creatures. Throughout the entire thing, Gamzee reacts in shock and disbelief, while Caliborn becomes happy, eventually looking hypnotically attracted to these events.
- Jane then heads to LOMAX and confesses her love to Jake. When he doesn't immediately reciprocate, she goes utterly insane when she makes such non sequiturs as "I FEEL SO'' ''PEACHY!"note and kicks him in the bulge to send him over a cliff. Furthermore, Jake's Big "NO!" that he belts out as he falls transforms into an "Oh, Yes!" Jake himself subsequently transforms.
- They then immediately decide to have relations, get married, and have a ZILLION BABIES...though not until after their ADVENTURE on Derse.
- The result of this ADVENTURE is their forceful recruitment of a supposedly invisible Roxy into Tricksterdom, along with the consideration that Roxy become Jake's "CO-BRIDE."
- As of this update, all four of the kids are in trickster mode. Yes, even Dirk succumbed to it...
- And then resisted it purely because of his incompatible personality. He then breaks up with Jake, though that's hardly the most heartbreaking thing in the update. That event would be the death of Fefetasprite, brought on by the extremely stressful confusion of old romantic dramas revived by Erisol and Arquius.
- It seems as if Trickster Mode has some positive results, as it has allowed the four Tricksters to alchemize the seven legendary weapons of "a magical kingdom from cherubim folklore." Each is seemingly tailored to the specibus of at least one human player from either universe. The first of these seven weapons? The Warhammer of Zillyhoo.
Act 6 Act 5 Act 1 X2 Combo:
- And then it's all over with the command GO BACK TO ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 1. Jane looks tweaked out of her mind, but before the reader can see more, Caliborn expresses his displeasure with Hussie's decision to end A6A5A2. After knocking the site around with the crowbar again and having a heated debate with Hussie over Trickster Mode's evils, Caliborn and Gamzee engage ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 1 x2 COMBO, a new viewing mode featuring two panels on each page. And what do these first double-panels show? That all four Alpha kids have somehow ended up on their Quest Crypts.
- Alpha Jack Noir becomes Jack English, thanks to a little gift from Gamzee.
- Jack English and the Condesce then simultaneously kill all four of the Alpha players by blowing up the moons with a Lord English Mouth Laser and a psionic Optiic Bla2t, respectively, allowing them, naturally, to ascend to God Tier.
- Jack attempts to kill Jane and Jake, but Jade appears and banishes Jack to the void, and thus the Beta Heroes finally begin their arrival...
- An arrival that will be impeded by the fact that the Condesce, with the Tavros/Vriska powers of animal communion and manipulation that work on GCat, makes Jade go GRIMBARK and, with Jade's and the Tiaratop's help, turns Jane Crockerdark. Jade banishes Dirk to the void, and the two variously eldritch-throed ex-heroes carry Roxy and Jake to the Condesce, who ends the whole act with a lipstick mark.
Act 6 Intermission 5
- Gamzee is responsible (partially, at least) for Caliborn's rise to power. From the moment of his birth.
- We finally learn why Terezi has been keeping her hood down for most of Act 6: once again, she can SEE. (And once again, the expression on Karkat's face perfectly mirrors the reader's).
- The ring that Hussie tried to propose to Vriska with, the ring that is presumably the one John now has, can actually bring anyone back from the dead, and it has a twin: the ring that Roxy lost.
- Caliborn's treasure that he hid away from anyone who could use it against him is a transparent, intangible Sburb House logo. Sounds fair enough, right? Well, when John reaches into the logo, he's able to literally get his hands into any point in Homestuck. Small wonder Caliborn locked it away.
- All seems well at first, until John blurs and disappears ominously.
- Spades Slick and a revived Felt are headed straight for the B2 session for an almost certain meetup of all three major incarnations of Jack Noir.
- John not only has his hand poking around the comic, but his whole, waking body teleports to various points along the comic's timeline as an effect of the logo juju, including the sixth sub-intermission, where he and Caliborn lock eyes so that we have the first in-person encounter between a juvenile cherub (in its natural form) and a human.
- The meteor group finally arrives in the new session! Unfortunately, the meteor itself misses contact with a planet altogether, and Karkat realizes that the group has no real way of slowing the meteor down when it comes into collision with something, meaning that the people on it will die. Just as Dave starts to come up with a couple of solutions, Grimbark!Jade shows up. She dumps them all (except for Gamzee) on LOMAX in front of John, who's doing nothing in particular but goofing around until that point.
Act 6 Act 6 Act 1
- The introduction to the Act, while amusing, does note that not only did Caliborn achieve the Godtier status, he ascended the whole Echeladder. A little later, he decides to put the narrative cartridge in in order for the story to progress, but he first jams it with Special Stardust, which leads to a much more shocking turn of events.
Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 1
- The next flash (opener for this sub-act) starts out normal, picking back up with Jade driving the meteor into Skaia before restoring the B1 session's planets into the B2 session. The video starts to break up due to the Special Stardust clogging the cartridge, and Jade can briefly be seen attacking John. Jane can briefly be seen with GCat staring at a monitor, and then the video abruptly stops before the narrative prompts the viewer to look at the aftermath of the event. Afterward, the characters who were once briefly united have been separated on several different planets, with noticable Laser-Guided Amnesia resulting from the glitching in the story. The Interface Screw garbles the text so bad that Dave can't even understand what Rose is saying (even though she's sober) and vice-versa. And most frighteningly, John is nowhere to be found.
- Jade kicking WV into lava never really ends up happening. How? John effectively erases it and much of the conversation leading up to it simply by zapping into a "repeat" of the narrative arc. Yet the narrative's events return to their original course in the arc's third/first iteration when a second John briefly appears and zaps him out just before Dave and Jade notice him. This not only means that John has the potential to dangerously alter the narrative with his power, but that in his future, he will control and use it to patrol the narrative for errant appearances of himself.
Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 2
- Gamzee steals the Ring of Life from John, but, surprisingly, not to ensure his own immortality; instead, he gives it to Aranea in the bubbles, and it appears that he's been acting as her servant for a long time.
- She then uses him to teleport directly into the Alpha session.
- Her ultimate plan? To create a doomed timeline where the session never bears fruit and the cherubs are never born, heal it, and shape it a new alpha timeline.
- Aranea's first step in this plan after her resurrection is to "heal" Jake's mind so that he reaches his full potential as Page of Hope. In the resulting final form, he creates a legion of angels, destroys a significant portion of Derse, No Sells Jade even at the extreme limits of her power, and cures her of the grimbark state.
- And Jake was still getting more powerful when Jane killed him.
- And then Aranea, in order to prevent Jade from being forced back into grimbarkness, crushes her with her house-tower. She even demonstrates the true extent of her Light powers by rigging the clock to register it as a "Just" death.
- After Jade's apparent death, Jane goes down in order to recover her body to heal her. Then Gamzee shows up out of absolutely nowhere, about to land on Jane. Aranea doesn't appreciate Roxy trying to stop her plan, so she puts her to sleep. With Brain Ghost Dirk behind her, sword drawn.
- Calliope's first appearance in a long time features her secret area being intruded upon by someone. That someone happens to be Jade.
- As Brain Ghost Dirk recognizes Aranea's obvious trap of offering her ring arm to him, he decides to put down his sword and rip her soul out of her body with the full power of a Prince of Heart instead.
- Jake's Hope Field is fading, and Brain Ghost Dirk along with it. Aranea's control over Gamzee is dissolving as Terezi screams for him to fight back. Rose is trying to wake Roxy from her slumber, just after meeting her for a second time. And to top it all off, Jane throws her Skaia fork at Jake, which skewers him straight in the heart.
- After those events, Aranea keeps her soul due to Brain Ghost Dirk disappearing upon the death of Jake, only to be set upon by an angry Jane. However, even after Aranea puts her to sleep, the Tiaratop controls Jane and makes her tackle Aranea!
- Meanwhile, Gamzee snaps out of his mind control and (in his original quirk!) pleads Terezi to stop. At this, Terezi becomes paralyzed with remorse. Unfortunalely, this causes Gamzee to lose himself in rage and punch Terezi.
- Also, Jake came back to life thanks to the clock, but on top of everything else, it's nothing.
- Lava has started raining down on Skaia since Jane's fork fell into LOFAF's lava, and amidst all the chaos happening, Her Imperious Condescension herself enters the fray. And then the intermission ends.
- And the day after this cliffhanger, Hussie begins the Gigapause, meaning the the story is left at a cliffhanger until Hussie can finish the rest of Homestuck (this was later changed to the rest Homestuck being posted serially just like it previously was).
Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 3
- At the end of a long state-of-affairs post that Andrew Hussie made nearly a whole year after the Gigapause began, he mentioned that before the end of Homestuck, there will be an event that he is dubbing as "The Rapture". Based on the description, it sounds as though this event will be the biggest Wham Episode in the history of the comic, and it will have significant repercussions on the remainder of the series. Holy Shit.We are slowly building to a particular moment I foresee on the horizon. It's not just characterized by the end of the story, though that should be a factor. It's more than that. Things I have planned, and some other things we'll say may be fortuitously aligned. Invisible pieces of a heinous machine all snapping together, mechanically congealing with a grim sense of purpose. I'm tentatively branding to this moment as The Rapture, and it will be more than you can bear. More than anyone can. And everyone won't.
- And then it presumably comes to pass in Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 3/[S] GAME OVER: Almost everybody dies. Karkat? Gets stabbed by Gamzee and thrown into the lava. Gamzee? Chainsawed in half by Kanaya. Kanaya? Gets vaporized by the Condesce's eye beams. Dave? Dies on top of Jade's corpse after trying and failing to defend himself from PM and Bec Noir (Heroic God Tier death). Jake? Takes a hit for Jane (Heroic God Tier death). Jane? Gets stabbed by the same weapon that kills Jake - with Jake still impaled on it. (Just God Tier death.) Rose? Tries to attack the Condesce for killing Kanaya, gets shanked by her trident and is rescued by Roxy, but dies shortly after (Heroic God Tier Death). Holy fuck. Intercut with John beating up Caliborn, before getting zapped away. In addition, Terezi is forced by Aranea to stab herself, but it is later revealed that she survives.
- Followed up by a second, smaller update, which sees the Condesce yank the Ring of Life off of Aranea's finger and then snap her neck, killing her in a "Just" fashion.
- To put it into perspective, by this point, only the following characters haven't been killed: John, Caliborn, Roxy, Terezi, Dirk, WV (although he was on LOHAC, so he may be dead), GCAT, the Sprites, Casey, PM, Bec Noir, alpha White Queen, alpha DD & CD, Jack English, Spades Slick and the Felt (plus Ms. Paint), Dad Crocker, and the Condesce.
Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 4
- Jade met an alternate version of Calliope that defeated her brother and ascended to god tier - meaning she could be the doomed Calliope who is theorized to be able to defeat Lord English. Apparently she told Jade many stories, one of which being the story of how in her universe John died.
- And then we discover the following:
- 1) This isn't Alpha Jade, but one from a doomed timeline.
- 2) John and Typheus make a bargain that involved killing John of that timeline, implying possibly even every alternate John in every timeline was also killed.
- 3) GAME OVER and everything seen in the Alpha session onwards takes place in a doomed timeline.
- And then we discover the following:
- Remember all the arms that appeared when John stuck it through the artifact. He did it again by using his powers to zap away ALL THE OIL ON LOWAS, leaving oil blotches to prove his mastery. IT KEEPS HAPPENING!
- John has finally mastered his Reality Warper powers, and in doing so can finally complete the quest of his planet that was set up for him over three years ago. He finally completes his quest and finishes it off by playing the magnificent [S]: Pipeorgankind on the gigantic pipe organ in Typheus' fortress to "play the breeze." This succeeds in not only engulfing his planet and the rest of the continuity of Homestuck in wind, but also manages to BLAST the faulty Homestuck Cartridge out of Caliborn's player and blow the candy corn and special stardust out! Suffice it to say that Pipeorgankind became a fan favorite after that flash.
- Jane joins Calliope and Jade in telling the story of that Jade's alternate timeline. Jade and Jane were still brainwashed by the Batterwitch, but Jade suddenly disappeared before she could scatter the heroes, allowing for them to plan a counterattack. However, during an attempt at a jailbreak, Roxy intercepts Jane's trident to protect Rose, dying a heroic death, and most likely fulfilling the requirement's of The Choice Nyx presented to Roxy.
- A double Whammy with John's final retcon as part of Terezi's plan. First, there was a hero in in Dream!Jade and Dream!Jane's timeline who led the heroes against the Condescension, someone who died earlier but was saved by John's Retcons. This leads directly into the second Wham. John saved Vriska from getting killed! "All bets are off" indeed.
- After getting done with Terezi's laundry list of changes to make to the timeline (with the exception of handing her the wallet that he lost), he returns to Roxy with the Ring Of Life. Then he warps with her in tow... along with the entire planet of LOWAS.
- To end Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 4; the Jade and Jane currently talking to Calliope aren't dead, they're asleep. Who put them to sleep? A now very much alive Vriska, who because of John's retconning was never killed by Terezi.
Act 6 Act 6 Act 5
- All three updates of this act, also called "Caliborn's Masterpiece", is this:
- Part 1 (posted on the 6th anniversary of Homestuck): Calliborn upgrades from shitty drawing to somewhat less shitty claymation as he begins to tell a story about a future point in time that he saw on his planet's monitors, before he got his Cairo Overcoat, but after he got his flashing eyes. He drops two bombshells: 1. he has the Ring of Void and 2. the Kids from both post-Scratch and pre-Scratch have teamed up and warped in using John's powers in order to try to defeat him then and there. This doesn't look pretty.
- Part 2: The functions of Caliborn's boon from Yaldabaoth are explained. First, it traps four souls into its windows, which he promptly uses on the pre-Scratch kids, leaving Caliborn to defeat the post-Scratch kids. Then, it becomes a gap in reality, the effects of which have already been demonstrated by John, which is a very big liability to Caliborn, hence why he hid it in the the depths of Paradox Space using the Ring of Void. Also, Jake awakens his hope powers again in response to the sight of Caliborn beating up Dirk.
- Part 3: Jake defeats Caliborn with his hope powers, inspiring him to later steal his name as Lord English. Then, while Arquiusprite pins him down, Dirk steals Caliborn's, Gamzee's and Arquiusprite's souls...and seals them into Lil' Cal and banishes the dummy into the Void, allowing it to manifest in the nightmares of children for Lord English to appear in their universe. Yep, that's right, Dirk and the post-Scratch kids essentially created Lord English.
Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 5
- Act 6 Act 6 Intermission 5 opens with Vriska going through assorted images of her time on the meteor, revealing that a lot of the bad stuff that happened in the three years? Gone. John's retconning not only brought Vriska back to life, but because she was there, she actually kept most of the problems encountered by the group from even happening. Including Terezi rekindling her friendship with her (and never entering a blackrom with Gamzee), Vriska stopping Rose from becoming The Alcoholic, and being the one to prototype the Alpha Kids' Sprites, starting with Tavros being prototyped by himself as Jane's Sprite.
- Something begins to warp Calliope's personal recluse, and she along with Jade and Jane decide to travel down the yellow spiral after it undulates into a path. They end up at a place Jade recognises, only for Jane to suddenly spring awake due to Arquisprite finishing his hacking of the Tiaratop. Jaspersprite accidentally prototypes Rosesprite with himself in a bout of happines, creating the humanoid Jasprosesprite^2. Sudddenly, the story goes back to Jade and Calliope's dream bubble, which is starting to become surrounded with reality cracks, where the culprit of the warping, God Tier!Calliope appears to them and beckons them forward, her text as red as Caliborn's blood.
- After the alternate Calliope instructs the alpha Calliope to "live", she disappears and the memory of Echidna's lair fades along with her, leaving Calliope alone in a dark void. Except she isn't alone. She has a guest in the form of Roxy, who slips the very Ring of Life that John recovered onto Calliope's finger. The latter actually smiles (this being the same person who was terrified of being rejected based on her appearance, mind you), before Roxy takes her hand and warps away with her in tow. Ladies and gentlemen, she's back.
- With Calliope's help, Roxy manages to tap into the essence of Alternia itself as she dives into the hammerspace of nonexistence in her latest attempt to conjure a matriorb...and she succeeds, to the duo's utter elation.
- Post-Retcon Vriska and Meenah are wandering LOMAT thinking of what to do as they look to recover the ghost army. They then find that it's under new management. Management that is named Tavros Nitram (well, the version of him that abandoned the Dead Vriska anyway).
Act 6 Act 6 Act 6
- For the EOA, [S] Collide:
- Caliborn defeats Yaldabaoth and claims his reward.
- Most of the ghost army is destroyed by Lord English, although the survivors are keeping him at bay.
- After a long battle, Roxy delivers the killing blow to Her Imperious Condescension.
- Dirk is caught in a lock by Union Jack, who is himself caught in a lock by Spades Slick. Dave beheads all of them, though he recovers Dirk's body and absconds with Terezi. Union Jack's disembodied head then explodes spectacularly, destroying most of LOTAK.
- Dad Crocker busts out of prison and helps Arquiusprite, Jake, and Karkat incapacitate the Felt.
- Jade tries to stop the fight between Peregrine Mendicant and Bec Noir. She fails due to PM's sheer determination, and PM cuts Bec's arm off, causing him to lose his ring's powers and revert back to Jack Noir.
- Doomed Timeline Calliope nears the Green Sun further still.
- And most shockingly of all, Hussie comes out of nowhere to beat the stuffing out of Post-Retcon Vriska. (Although this does have the effect of her losing custody of the Juju.)
Oh Jegus, how can simple words be so plot-twisting?
- In John's first conversation with Nannasprite, the audience and John learn that Homestuck will not be about saving the world, because it is absolutely doomed.JOHN: and then after that, we solve this ultimate riddle thing and save earth from destruction!!!NANNASPRITE: Oh no, I'm afraid not!NANNASPRITE: Your planet is done for, dear! There is nothing you can do about that!
- Rose reveals that the vandalism in John's room has existed long before John and the audience first noticed it. This seriously casts doubt on John's mental state and the audience's perception of events.TT: Your posters have looked like that ever since I first saw your room.
- The Snowman's powers were undisclosed for a time, and assumed to be just as situational and silly as the powers of other members of the Felt. When she finally appears in person, the narration gives us an idea of the scale of her power. "Everyone always ceases gunplay when Snowman's around. If you kill her you destroy the universe."
- This line from Dave reveals that the Flash Forward to four months is a Bad Future where two of the main characters have died.TG: what else is there to knowTG: we lostTG: cant finish the game with a dead heir and witch
- The line to John from Karkat points to how things went south in the kids' session.EB: ok, well you keep saying how doomed we are and how all this bad stuff happens sooner, but you never say why!EB: what happens in our game that's different from yours that makes things go so badly?CG: JACK NOIR.
- Courtesy of Aradia Megido, the ultimate purpose of Sburb and the end goal of the comic as a whole: to create a new universe.AA: banished fr0m the universe we left behindAA: and yet in being denied the ultimate rewardAA: we w0uld be barred fr0m entryAA: int0 the universe we created.
- In the first "Alterniabound" ("Past Karkat: Wake Up") Equius gives us a shocking revelation about Sprites: that they can be killed.EQUIUS: Aurthor is dead.EQUIUS: And so is his ghost.
- Dave listens to the Horrorterrors, and finds out something more powerful than them is hunting them.TG: im pretty sure it wasTG: likeTT: ?TG: a plea for help
- And then Rose reveals the identity of her informant:TG: what you mean a trollTT: No.TT: It's a man who exists in another universe.TT: He wants to die.
- A pretty big one came buried under lots of text here, where we learn that Jade's mysterious penpal is somehow her grandson.GG: because he said hes my grandson
- In the middle of an entirely unrelated incident, the focus cuts to Gamzee Makara, an entirely irrelevant joke character, staring at his computer, as the narration describes him as the most important character in Homestuck. This entirely changes the adueince's perspective on Gamzee, who (again) had no significant role in the plot."While a timer counts down with no particular clock stepping forward to claim it...The most important character in Homestuck fondly regards the miracle of a new beginning."
- One word shattered the expectations of fans used to Plot Armor: DEAD. Alongside the brutal image of Tavros's bleeding body, it set the tone for the slaughter of troll characters that would come up. It also overlaps with Unsound Effect.
- Kanaya informs Jade on the importance of the Genesis Frog, by explaining that the frog is literally an entire universe, and that creating the frog will result in a universe for Jade to nurture.GA: He Is Not Responsible For Just One Aspect Of The Universe You CreateGA: He's Responsible For All Of ThemGA: Bilious Slick Is Your Universe
- With this line from Eridan, everything goes to hell as he goes from being a jerk to a coward willing to align with a genocidal demon at the cost of his own friends.CA: fight himCA: are you fuckin nutsCA: i slaughtered enough angels to knoww my limits and wwhere i stand against the lord of all angels they prophesizedCA: of course im not gonna fight him i stand no chance in hell against that guyCA: im goin to join him
- "Don't turn your back on the body" is an intentional wham line meant on Doc Scratch's part to make Karkat paranoid and nervous around the corpses that now litter his surroundings.
- Gamzee may have been called "the most important character in Homestuck, but that didn't stop him from spending most of Act 5 stoned out his mind and too concerned with his pile of bicycle horns get on anyone's bad side. And then ...TC: shut up.
- Just before that, "TC: honk."/"TC: HONK." is a much more subtle one. The fact that he isn't using his typical Typing Quirk is the first indication that something is not right with him.
- Rose's rage over her mother's death and failed attempt to understand the incomprehensible Gods of the Furthest Ring result in her being overtaken by darkness, as revealed in an overly verbose and kind of silly paragraph from right before we see Grimdark!Rose."You slip into the fabled blackdeath trance of the woegothics, quaking all the while in the bloodeldritch throes of the broodfester tongues. You advise the members of your Complacency not to be alarmed, as they chronicle the event in tomes bound in the tanned, writhing flesh of a tortured hellscholar, with runes stroked in the black tears bled from the corruption-weary eyes of fifty thousand imaginary occultists. But they fail to not be alarmed. This is because, as is now painfully obvious to anyone with a brain, you have basically gone completely off the deep end in every way. You have officially gone grimdark."
- Perhaps the most meta example in the story occurs in the aftermath of [S] Flip (edited for clarity):The disk is too badly damaged. You can no longer play Homestuck.You are forced to quit. You will not be able to resume playing unless you can repair the scratch in the disk.You will need to seek the service of someone who is capable of fixing a scratch.A scratch doctor, if you will.
- "Pardon me while I let Jack inside."
- Doc Scratch gets a few of these during his intermission. Sorted by date:
- 5/25/11: "The duel ends. The Seer dies. The Slayer departs. The Heir comes back to life."
- 5/31/11: "With as little fanfare, he seized the opportunity to follow the Thief's trail quickly before it dissipated, and destroyed their hideout in the veil."
- 6/8/11: "What sort of story would this be, with our Knight and Seer made to stay cadavers? Certainly not one the alpha timeline would allow. And not one she'd allow either."
- 6/19/11: "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KILL HER."
- When Dreambubble John finally begins to remember the Awful Truth:GT: This was not the suit i was wearing when i died.
- Davesprite explains to Jade his second encounter with Hephaestus:DAVESPRITE: see it turns out
DAVESPRITE: i had no idea how the denizens worked at all
- From Nannasprite, on the identity of her adopted mother, Betty Crocker:pipefan413: She knew the baroness was not human! :B
- Karkat apologizes:PCG: I GAVE YOUR WHOLE UNIVERSE CANCER, JADE.
- Betty Crocker: @turntechGodhead Please enjoy. Mr. Strider. http://tinyurl.com/MoThErFuCkInMiRaClEs
- We find out why Gamzee is "the most important character in Homestuck":TC: AND I WENT AND MADE YOUR UNIVERSE...TC: terminal. Bo)
- And then (much later) we find that "the most important character" mentioned in that scene isn't actually Gamzee...
- Quoth Doc Scratch about an early set of Alternians: "Once, in this very universe, you could say, Alternia was home to a peaceful race. Trollkind had never known the corrupting influence in their evolution which led them to perpetual war and violence. That is to say, they had never known me."
- A little later, same conversation:"The heroes chose to accept this bargain, and scratched their session."
- A little later, same conversation: "But in addition to losing their memories of everything that had happened before the scratch, there was another catch for the failed heroes. In the new reality, they would not serve as the heroes."
- And a final one from Scratch, probably the biggest of all, at the EOA5 flash, right before all the kids' plans come to a head and the universe is reset:
- Lord English finally makes his first appearance:GIRL.YOU THERE. GIRL.GIRL, QUIT ALL THIS SCURRYING AROUND.DO YOU BELIEVE YOU CAN ESCAPE ME BEFORE I ARRIVE?HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO OUTRUN ME
- uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering gutsyGumshoe [GG] at 11:17
- In an otherwise silly and hilarious conversation with a 15-year-old drunk:GG: I believe SOMEBODY doesn't want me to play.
GG: How else do you explain the recent attempts on my life?
- "The Page is dead. Our hope is lost."
- When John asks how long it will take him and Jade to cross the Yellow Yard and arrive in the new session:GG: i would say
GG: if i keep our speed constant...
GG: we should arrive in about three years
- "You say it's all fair game now that the kingdom's under new management. The new boss ain't opposed to taking some shrewd tactical shortcuts."
- In a conversation with Dirk Strider, Roxy drops this conversational bomb, about her "upbringin"TG: like
TG: do u know how misrable it is for your bff to doubt you
TG: when you tell her your mom is dead
- In a dream bubble, Terezi has a chat with Vriska. Only to learn something unexpected.GC: VR1SK4
GC: YOU SOUND R34LLY D1FF3R3NT
GC: WH4T H4PP3N3D TO YOU OUT H3R3?
AG: Sorry for the ruse.
AG: Though it isn't as far from the truth as it possi8ly could 8e, I am not who you think I am.
- With this line from Roxy, humanity's fate is made significantly less ambiguous:TT: There are no humans either. They all went extinct.
TT: Roxy and I are the only ones left, as far as we know.
- Caliborn's "shitty twist":uu: I ALREADY KILLED HER!!!!!
- The prelude to one of the most shocking revelations in Act 6.UU: oh bUgger. this is so embarrassing to have to admit.
UU: i am sorry for saying things which may have reasonably led yoU to believe this.
UU: probably way too many things. u_u;
UU: bUt i am not actUally a troll.
- "But the fact that he's a slob was never exactly breaking news to anyone. Neither is the fact that you both share a body."
- Parodied while John and Jade are watching Con Air:JOHN: jade...
JOHN: i think i just realized something.
JOHN: THIS MOVIE FUCKING SUCKS!!!
- Kurloz' lines after he gets the codpiece from Meulin:EXCELLENT WORK, MY MAGEIT MUST BE DELIVERED TO THE BARD OF RAGE AT ONCE, SO THAT HE MAY CONTINUE OUR LORDS MIRTHFUL MOTHER FUCKIN WORKLONG LIVE THE ANGEL OF DOUBLE DEATH
- Caliborn does it again.uu: THAT SACCHARINE TRAMP IS SUCH A GONER. SHE'S NEVER COMING BACK.uu: JUST LIKE YOUR DAPPER HUMAN GUARDIAN.
- Caliborn talks to Jake about his session, and eventually reveals that he has a new Juju. What is this, you ask?GT: So whats this juju he gave you?
uu: THE THING IS. I UNDERSTAND HIM MORE NOW.uu: BEFORE I THOUGHT HE WAS A CURSED VESSEL OF MISFORTUNE. WHICH SEEMED EERILY EMPTY TO ME.uu: HE WAS HOLLOW. NOT YET FILLED WITH BAD JUJU.uu: AND LOOKING IN HIS EYES NOW. I SEE. THAT I WAS RIGHT. ALMOST.uu: HE IS EMPTY RIGHT NOW. BUT A JUJU FOLLOWS A LONG AND WINDING PATH ON ITS ETERNAL JOURNEY.uu: AND HE WILL NOT BE EMPTY FOREVER.uu: SOMEWHERE ALONG HIS JOURNEY.uu: IN SOME WAY I DON'T UNDERSTAND YET.uu: HE WILL STOP BEING EMPTY.uu: AND HIS CURSE WILL COME TO LIFE.uu: AND WHEREVER HE GOES. TO WHATEVER UNIVERSE OR PLANE OF REALITY.uu: ALL WHO EXIST THERE. WILL EXPERIENCE NOTHING BUT MISERY AND DEATH.
- Don't worry, what he says next makes it all better:
uu: AND ALL THOSE ALONG THE WAY.uu: WHO HE DEEMS WORTHY.uu: OF ACCEPTING INTO HIS CUSTODY.uu: IF THEY SHOULD DARE TO FONDLY GAZE.uu: INTO HIS SPARKLING BABY BLUES.uu: THEY WILL BE PEERING THROUGH THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WINDOWS.
- The cherry on top:
- Probably the weirdest Wham Line in the entirety of Homestuck follows the Trickster sequence.GO BACK TO ACT 6 ACT 5 ACT 1
- In the midst of the long-anticipated meeting between Jade and the Alpha Kids, this command lets the readers know that everything is about to go very, very wrong:
- In a dreambubble, John asks Aradia what she really wants.
- The Troll's meteor is about to crash. How could it get any worse? Well...BARK
- John Egbert has gone missing.
- John Egbert's ring has gone missing.
- And then, we see its new bearer is not meant to be the clown who steals it, but a master nobody could see coming:ARANEA: Rise, my 8ard.
- And THEN:ARANEA: I'm going to take over this session.ARANEA: And then I am going to make sure it never 8ears fruit.
- AND THEN:
- AND FUCKING THEN:ARANEA:8ut the moment she wakes up, she will simply 8ecome possessed again.ARANEA: Again, I am very sorry.ARANEA: 8ut it must 8e done.
- And after all of the above, the most painful word in HS history:
- And then, we see its new bearer is not meant to be the clown who steals it, but a master nobody could see coming:
- Keeping the above in mind, there's this:JADE: hi!
- Jane to Jake as the hope field dies:JANE: Forgive me, Jake.
- Gamzee gets one right after Jake's death - not so much because of what he says, but how he says it (and the fact that he's saying it):GAMZEE: TeReZi...GAMZEE: wHoA.GAMZEE: PlEaSe StOp.GAMZEE: YoU'rE mOtHeRfUcKiN...GAMZEE: hUrTiNg Me. :o(
- Which is then followed up by...
- Jade, when talking about the stories that the alternate Calliope told her:JADE: so she went on to tell another storyJADE: not one about your brotherJADE: but one about mineCALLIOPE: it already soUnds like a mUch more pleasant story.JADE: wellJADE: not exactly...JADE: this is the story about how he died
JADE: you were a god tier!
- A little earlier than that, we find out how Jade knew Calliope; they conversed in a dream once. And...
JADE: a transition to a story about MY brother... who was stuck in a doomed timeline tooJADE: i think ill mess it up if i try to match what she said word for wordJADE: she had a really fanciful way of putting thingsCALLIOPE: there's no need to try to recite what she said.CALLIOPE: jUst tell the story in yoUr own voice, as yoU have already been doing!CALLIOPE: it will be more fUn that way.JADE: okJADE: so the bottom line wasJADE: almost all our friends had diedJADE: and johns only hope was to return to his planet, and attempt to complete his personal quest
- Shortly after, Jade drops another bombshell:
- One of Terezi's last instructions to John:KNOCK H3R OUT! YOU C4N'T L3T M3 K1LL H3R
- A bombshell at the end of A6A6I4:JADE: we were never dead at allJADE: weve been asleep!
- A bit of a jolt comes at the Lalondes and Dave's conversation partway through in A6A6I5, due to who says it.VRISKA: Assuming you 8other going to see her at all. Couldn't really 8lame you if you didn't though.ROSE: I probably won't.ROSESPRITE: Won't what?
- When John asks Vriska why she won't be here with everyone else to take on the main threats in the session, here's what Vriska says:VRISKA: I'm traveling to the furthest ring to go kill Lord English.
- Notably, this was right before the first week-pause in A6A6I5.
- When Jaspers begins to react to everyone being happy about Jane's rescue:JASPERSPRITE: Purr purr purr...JASPERSPRITE: All the humans being so close together and happy and friendly purr purr.JASPERSPRITE: Its making me really excited and happy too and making me feel like i want to be a part of everything!JASPERSPRITE: Purr purr and get close to a nearby person and be happy at them with my body purrrr...ROSESPRITE: Jaspers, what are you...JASPERSPRITE: I cant help it rose i want to cuddle im feeling so pleased and friendly! :3 :3 :3ROSESPRITE: Jaspers, no,ROSESPRITE: No, don't!
- And then came Jasprosesprite^2, not only the first sprite fusion, but technically the first third-tier one to boot, too.
- Doubling with Wham Shot, as the text happens to be Caliborn's red.CALLIOPE: welcome back, jade.
- Doubling as a Wham Shot, but in [S] Act 7, we get this final message from Sburb after the gang enters the new universe:"Thanks for Playing"
Homestuck also has plenty of surprises that are confined to fleeting moments.
- Bec jumping into Jade's kernelsprite. And then, if the implications hadn't hit you yet, Jack Noir undergoing his final transformation.
- Gamzee fondly observing the past, having a bloody injury and a sinister demeanor. Up until that point, he was a Joke Character, but this tease indicated that he had a much larger and more sinister role in the story ahead.
- Calliope's true face. It's so much of a spoiler, that author provided a fake image and asked people not to spoil the twist.
- Caliborn ripping out his leg and replacing it with a robotic one, in the exact same place as Lord English's peg leg. And if that doesn't convince you that he's Lord English's past self, then he spits out a tooth, in the same place as Lord English's golden tooth, and brings out his cane/assault rifle.
- Terezi with seeing eyes.
- This update brings us four in short succession. First Gamzee has the Ring of Life. Then, he's actually being mind-controlled. Then, the mind-controller turns out to be Aranea Serket. Then, she puts the ring on and is brought back to life.
- [S]: GAME OVER looks like it's gonna be epic and darkly humorous...and then Gamzee stabs Karkat and drops him in lava.
- The update following the A6A6I5 flash zooms into a Skaian cloud showing some of the kids and trolls on the endgame platform.
- [S]: Collide has several.
- Dad Crocker punching his way out of prison.
- Aradia timestopping Lord English. And then strangling him with her whip.
- Union Jack restraining Dirk, followed by Spades Slick restraining Union Jack—what follows is Dave having to cut all three of their heads off.
- And then Union Jack's head nukes the planet they were on (after they escape, fortunately).
- PM punching Jade in the face to keep her from interfering with her vengeance on Bec Noir and then slicing Bec Noir's arm off, defeating him for good.
- At the end, the Condesce is suddenly impaled through the back by Bro's sword. As she falls dead, we see who killed her: Roxy.
- From [S]: Act 7.
- The larval Genesis Frog bursting out of the forge and metamorphosing into a new universe.
- Calliope conjuring a black hole to destroy the Green Sun.
- WV and PM constructing a real version of Can Town.
- "Thanks for Playing" (doubles as a Wham Line).
- Lord English's eyes stop cycling and his expression becomes one of legitimate fear when he realizes the treasure juju is about to be used on him.
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