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Characters / The Weedverse Crystal Empire

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    Princess Cadance 
The Princess of Love and ruler of the Crystal Empire. She's married to Shining Armor, Twilight Sparkle's older brother, making her a daughter-in-law to Night Light and Twilight Velvet, and sister-in-law to both Twilight Sparkle and Trixie Lulamoon.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: Impeccably nice and friendly, always sets ponies at ease etc. She also will do absolutely anything to advance her goals.
  • Berserk Button: Lying. Because Cadance is a powerful empath and the Alicorn of Love who works to marry off lonely ponies, she takes love very seriously and will not tolerate dishonesty from anyone due to it causing major relationship hangups.
  • Casual Kink: When chatting with Celestia quite happily discusses some of the stuff she and Shining get up to, such as roleplaying and spanking; she and Shining sometimes switch roles. Somewhat hilariously, she finds discussion of Blueblood and Raven's relationship Too Much Information.
  • The Chessmaster: It sometimes seems that half of Equestria are involved in her schemes somewhere. Not for nothing is she referred to as "The Busybody".
  • Complete Immortality: Her ascension was induced by Celestia splicing a portion of her soul onto Cadance, transmitting this trait as well.
  • Divine Date: She's an immortal Alicorn Princess married to Shining Armor, a mortal unicorn. It's eventually subverted in Lies, Damn Lies, And Statistics when Shining ascends and becomes an Alicorn as well.
  • The Empath: A powerful one, able to sense Gloomy August's sorrow from miles away in Whatever Way The Wind Takes You. She refers to this ability as her "love-sense" in The Sun Also Surprises.
  • Good People Have Good Sex: Cadance's sex life with Shining Armor is pretty healthy, much to their daughters' embarrassment.
  • Happily Married: To Shining Armor.
  • Healing Hands: Cadance has the most powerful healing magic in Equestria, and doesn't quite know how it works, but it uses the love others have for each other. In Perilous Romance, when she tries to heal Skyfire Flash so she and her unborn colt could live, she accidentally uses too much love and almost completely ascends a nearby Gosling, giving him an alicorn-sized wingspan.
  • How Do I Shot Web?: Cadance isn't quite sure on how her healing magic works, only that it relies on ponies' love for each other to work.
  • Hypocritical Humor: She gushes about her own relationship with Shining Armor and the things they do, but she finds anything concerning Blueblood and Raven's... passionate relationship extremely uncomfortable.
  • Lady of War
  • Long List: As revealed in Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Cadance has a lot of foalhood ambitions, including becoming a marine biologist, a Wonderbolt, and writing O&O modules (due to being annoyed with poor female representation).
  • Love Goddess: Naturally, as the Alicorn Princess of Love. Her domain also makes her receptive to other ponies' feelings.
  • Physical God: As an Alicorn Princess. She was made immortal by being given a portion of Celestia's own soul.
  • Personality Powers: Cadance is a kind, empathetic alicorn who wants to help ponies with their problems. She's The Empath, and one of the most powerful magic healers in the Weedverse.
  • Pink Is Feminine: Taking from canon, Cadance is described as a pink alicorn, and an empathic personality and power set to match.
  • Power Incontinence: Things tend to happen when she ingests too much love while she's healing. In Perilous Romance, while trying to heal a heavily pregnant Skyfire Flash, she loses control and nearly causes Gosling to Ascend completely, only succeeding in giving him an alicorn wingspan.
  • The Power of Love: Cadance's powerful healing magic relies on ponies' love for each other in order for it to work successfully. If there's negative feelings nearby, it won't work.
  • Royals Who Actually Do Something: Cadance runs the Crystal Empire as her day job and, in her spare time, works on her stable of therapists, while doing no small part of it herself. She won't hesitate to help ponies in need, even when it's Princess Celestia or Princess Luna.
  • Secret Keeper: She and her daughters kept the alicorn ascension process from Shining so he wouldn't end up feeling pressured to become an alicorn. After discovering this, Shining finally agrees to it.
  • Serious Business: Cadance, as The Empath and a massive Shipper on Deck, considers love to be this. In The Sun Also Surprises, Cadance warns Celestia to take love seriously, and be open and honest with herself and her potential partner. In Perilous Romance, she follows up with another warning, telling Celestia not to interfere with love or her own relationship with Gosling, or consequences will follow.
  • Shipper on Deck: Desperately wants everyone to be happy, and knows how much happier good relationships can make people. Once she begins the blindfold weddings, she's this on a literally industrial scale.
    Princess Cadance: Loneliness is a disease and I am desperately searching for a cure.
  • Soul Power: Can use Animancy like Celestia and Luna, but she's still learning. In Lies, Damn Lies, And Statistics, she uses this power to ascend her unicorn husband, Shining Armor, into an Alicorn.
  • Super Senses: Cadance has very acute hearing due to being an alicorn, to the point where she could hear mice and shrews fart.
  • Vitriolic Best Buds: Develops a mutually antagonistic but still friendly relationship with Gosling.

    Shining Armor 
Co-ruler of the Crystal Empire and married to the Alicorn Princess Cadance, his wife. He is the father of two Alicorn Princesses, Flurry Heart and Skyla. He had the potential to become an Alicorn, but when initially offered to Ascend, he repeatedly turned it down. He eventually agrees to ascend after much thinking in Lies, Damn Lies, And Statistics.
  • Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence: In Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, much like his younger sister Twilight before him in the canon show, Shining ends up in a cosmic realm when he ascends - in his case, Shining ends up in the domain of the Librarian of Souls who subjects him to a Secret Test of Character (it's to assure Cadance), before he comes back an alicorn.
  • Badass Baritone: Has a deep voice.
  • Barrier Warrior: Much like his canon self, his talent is shield magic, represented by his shield cutie mark. He is noted to be one of the most powerful shield users, followed by Sumac post-Ascension.
  • Complete Immortality: Kudzuhaiku stated that when Cadance turned Shining into an Alicorn with Animancy, a tiny sliver of the soul Celestia gave her during her Ascension passed onto Shining, making her husband immortal.
  • Divine Date: A mortal unicorn married to Cadence, an immortal Alicorn Princess. Subverted in Lies, Damn Lies, And Statistics, when he finally agrees to ascend and is turned into an immortal Alicorn by Cadence's Animancy.
  • Drill Sergeant Nasty: In Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Shining had to resort to shouting at an overexcited Flurry to get her to calm down. This ends up in a lot of affected bystanders, as they were both in a military base.
  • Eternal Love: With his Ascension into an immortal Alicorn, Shining's relationship with Cadance turns into this.
  • Exact Words: Exploited; whenever Skyla and Flurry call him out for using his Affectionate Nicknames for them, Shining will claim that he "never agreed to anything", meaning that he never agreed to stop using said nicknames.
  • Genius Bruiser: A magical powerhouse, and brilliant with it.
  • Good Parents: To his daughters, Princesses Flurry Heart and Skyla.
  • Good People Have Good Sex: Shining's sex life with Cadance is pretty healthy, much to their daughters' embarrassment.
  • Happily Married: To Princess Cadance.
  • Heroic BSoD: After finding out that even his own family was keeping the secret of Ascension from him, Shining spends some time reevaluating himself and comes to the conclusion that no matter what he does, it'll never be enough since he's just a mortal unicorn.
  • Immortality Seeker: Double-subverted. When he was offered to become an Alicorn, Shining refused, figuring he could do just fine as a unicorn. In Foalsitting Follies, Gosling mentions that Blueblood, along with Shining Armor, refuses to become an Alicorn because they want to show that unicorns can make a difference. Twilight Sparkle wishes they would change their minds, however. But in Lies, Damn Lies, And Statistics, after Shining learns from a regretful Flurry Heart that all of the Alicorns, including his own family, had been keeping the secrets of ascension from him, he has an epiphany, and finally agrees. The result is Alicorn Shining Armor. In Down With The Pastryarchy, Celestia mentions that she feels glad that Shining finally came to his senses.
  • Large and in Charge: Kudzuhaiku stated on his Discord server that after Ascending and becoming an Alicorn, Shining's build resembles Big Mac somewhat. He's also a co-ruler of the Crystal Empire.
  • Magic Knight: As good at physical combat as he is with magic.
  • Making Love in All the Wrong Places: In the first chapter of Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Shining thinks back to the places where he would make love with Cadance, including underneath the stage where Celestia would give public speeches.
  • The Nicknamer: Has nicknamed his wife and daughters, to the latter group's embarrassment.
  • Physical God: After he finally accepts the offer of Ascension, Shining Armor has his soul molded by Cadence using Animancy, and ascends into an Alicorn.
  • Real Men Wear Pink: Has a frilly pink apron. It's a pain keeping white hair clean.
  • Smart People Play Chess: With Raven Inkwell in Perilous Romance.

Gosling's mother. One of the few people who legitimately scares Princess Celestia. She later moves to the Crystal Empire to be nanny to Cadance's foals in Perilous Romance (after some twitnote  made Flurry a helmet out of melon, the last straw for her previous nanny).

    Flurry Heart 
A female alicorn, oldest daughter of Shining Armor and Princess Cadance, and the leader of the Wipe-Outs, a particularly troublesome group of foals including Sumac, Boomer and Megara besides herself.
  • Baby Factory: Part of the reason why she caused the events of Crystal Cotillion; she was expected by the Crystal Empire's nobility to be the mother of foals, due to ancient laws that are now outdated. In Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, it's briefly discussed between Shining and Cadance.
  • Brains and Brawn: She's the brawn to contrast her intelligent younger sister, Skyla.
  • Complete Immortality: Subverted; while her mother is immortal thanks to Celestia imparting a piece of her soul onto her, she and her younger sister Skyla aren't. However, they could become immortal if they chose to.
  • Dance Battler: Explicitly only learned to dance to improve her fighting abilities.
  • An Ice Person: Specializes in ice magic.
  • The Leader: To the Wipe-Outs as mentioned above. Members include Sumac, Boomer, and Megara.
  • Physical God: Goes with being an Alicorn.
  • Secret Keeper: She and the other Alicorns, including her own mother, were supposed to keep the process of Alicorn ascension a secret from their un-ascended loved ones, including Shining Armor, so they wouldn't be pressured. She hated it though, since she felt like she was lying to her own father, and finally comes clean with him.
  • Shipper on Deck: Rather keen on Sunburst/Starlight.
  • Use Your Head: A mundane example in Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics - thanks to Cadance, Flurry learns how to crack coconuts with her own head. Shining is concerned.

    Princess Skyla 
The younger daughter of Cadance and Shining Armor.
  • Badass Bookworm
  • Brains and Brawn: She's the brains to contrast her brawny, tomboyish older sister, Flurry.
  • Calling the Old Man Out: Inverted; Skyla is admonished by her father Shining for her bratty behavior after she throws a tantrum during dinner on vacation, despite him feeling sympathetic towards her Creature of Habit tendencies.
  • Complete Immortality: Subverted; while Skyla's mother is immortal thanks to Celestia imparting a piece of her soul onto her, she and her sister Flurry aren't. However, they could become immortal if they chose to.
  • Creature of Habit: She really doesn't cope well with changes in routine, which makes childhood holidays problematic from dealing with her tantrums. A family vacation to the beach led to her throwing a tantrum and acting like a brat during dinner.
  • Embarrassing Damp Sheets: Skyla suffered this in Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics after a nightmare, so she sought her father Shining for help.
  • The High Queen: Her power relies on this. She gains power from having subjects, but because it works off their love for her, she must rule well.
  • Nose Nuggets: After Flurry gets fed up with her sister's tantrums and threatens to eat the cucumber sandwich she doesn't like for her, Skyla decides to sneeze-spray on it in a fit of childish spite. It's when Shining decides to take Skyla away for a nap/time-out.
  • Parental Sexuality Squick: Skyla's rather weirded out by her parents' healthy sex life. Shining and Cadance later invoke the trope by heavily flirting with each other to get back at Skyla for meddling with their relationship. Skyla's loud attempts to abort don't work.
  • The Quiet One: To the degree that it's concerning Gosling.
  • Shorter Means Smarter: At least while they're both young, she's shorter than Flurry, and the more intellectual.
  • Screaming at Squick: In the beginning of Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Skyla runs away screaming in disgust at something Flurry apparently found in a tide pool.

One of the two Court Mages of the Crystal Empire, and in a relationship with Starlight Glimmer.

    Chartreuse Le Feu 
A filly with a strange variant on the shield spell, with it heating up on absorbing impacts. She makes her way to the Crystal Empire to try and become Shining Armor's apprentice.
  • The Apprentice: To Shining Armor, Dim Dark and Sunburst, collectively.
  • Barrier Warrior: With a twist: Every time something strikes her shield, the energy is converted to heat. This can potentially continue indefinitely.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: To quote Cadance:
    Princess Cadance: Chartreuse is so polite and unassuming, right up until the point where she isn’t, and then, at that point, it is too late.
  • Blood Knight: A portion of the conflict in Nom's Mom Bomb is Chartreuse coming to terms with her enjoyment of the nightly duties of a wizard, standing guard against the monsters in the dark.
  • Bribe Backfire: In Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Celestia attempts to bribe hernote . Net result, Princess Celestia sentenced to public humiliation and a thoroughly cowed nobility.
  • Bright Is Not Good: To quote the author: "Nature tried to warn the world and potential predators: Do not attempt to eat this unicorn. Danger!"
  • Celibate Hero: Is far more interested in her studies and duties than romance.
  • Has a Type: White coats and feminine curves, as indicated by her crush on Rarity and then Chalcedony.
  • Incompatible Orientation: Has a crush on Chalcedony for a while, but Chalcedony is straight as an arrow.
  • Iron Lady: While in command of the Empire.
  • The Knights Who Say "Squee!": She's something of a fanfilly for famous wizards.
  • Lady of War: Spent some time as a student of Rarity, and has learned well.
  • Meaningful Name: Chartreusenote  Le Feunote .
  • Motor Mouth: When she's in Squee! mode.
  • Person of Mass Destruction: On Canterlot Intelligence's list of such people, and for good reason.
  • Playing with Fire: Her take on her shield magic; every time something or someone strikes her shields, they get hotter and hotter to the point of inflicting serious burns.
  • Undying Loyalty: There is a reason that Shining Armor is very careful of his orders around her.
  • The Workaholic: Has a streak of this, to the concern of her masters.
  • You Are in Command Now: In Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics, Shining jokingly told Chartreuse that she's in charge of looking after the Crystal Empire while the royal family's on vacation, despite Sunburst and Dim officially having the job. When Shining comes back later, he finds that Chartreuse's loyalty to him was so strong that she actually took his joke seriously, and ruled the Crystal Empire with an iron hoof.

A blind filly in the Crystal Empire who can see the magical light spectrum.
  • Blind Seer: She cannot see normal light, instead seeing thaumaton radiation, making mundane objects invisible to her, but magic is visible.
  • Bully Hunter: Given that Nomination's regulations prevent him fighting back, she does it for him when one of his crushes decides to respond to being asked out with an assault.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: She was a blind orphan in Sombra's rule over the Crystal Empire. Her early life was not good.
  • The Force Is Strong with This One: Can see how powerful a wizard is as a result of her ability.
  • Freudian Excuse: Because she grew up in a time when homosexuality wasn't acceptable, Chalcedony has bigoted feelings towards ponies who swing certain ways. But she keeps it hidden for the sake of keeping Nomination happy.
  • Handicapped Badass: Despite being a blind filly, Chalcedony was able to beat the snot out of a colt who assaulted Nomination for asking him out.
  • Motor Mouth
  • The Nicknamer: Both Chartreuse and Nomination end up nicknamed within a few hours.
  • No Sense of Personal Space: Because she's blind, the only way she can know what someone looks like is to touch them all over. The tendency of colts to respond badly to this has interfered with her ability to Eat The Eye Candy.
  • Parental Abandonment: She doesn't know who her parents are, or if they're alive or anything. It's almost certainly not their fault; Sombra's rule was far from benevolent.
  • Stepford Smiler: Her constant cheeriness belies a distinct pessimism, born of her Dark and Troubled Past.
  • Troubled Sympathetic Bigot: She finds homosexuality inherently repulsive as a result of her upbringing in a time when it wasn't acceptable, but hides it for the sake of Nomination's feelings.

A draconic pegasus colt who is studying cooking at Princess Cadance's school.

    Quiet Dark 
The daughter of Dim Dark and Blackbird.


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