Funny / Rebel Taxi

Let's just say driver Pan-Pizza has a twisted sense of humor that's bound to make you fall over laughing.

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    Pizza Party Podcast 
General
  • Whenever the other members rip on Pan.
  • Pan brings up something that has to do with fetishes.
  • Usually at least once an episode, Pan will say "What were we talking about? Oh yeah, (topic from several minutes ago)" and proceed to quickly wrap up that conversation.
  • Jim's enthusiasm about Monster Trucks.
1 - Adventure Time Screws Up

2 - Sonic Cartoons Look Back Retrospective
  • Ken's request for JFK Vines/ #JFKStyle and Nolan's comment on how they will be viewed as terrorists: (Headline) "Local Terrorists Start JFK Vines, more at 11:00." "Apparently they were doing it for the "L-O-L-Zs?"
  • Pan going insane over Chris Thorndyke calling Sonic his only friend.
3 - Johnny Test Cancelled and our Favorite Video Games Based on Cartoons
  • Pan and crew (hopefully jokingly) acting like Fan Haters towards Family Guy, and later a bunch of other things, and suggest the fans kill themselves. It's so rude and uncalled for, yet it's hilarious.
  • Pan starts crying like a little bitch after his friends make fun of his response to Zone on Twitter thanking him for putting Zone-tan in his Top 10 Worst Redesigns video.
    Zone: It was a pleasure working with you.
    Pan: It was a pleasure JERKING with you.
  • The rather blunt explanation of Astro Boy's plot.
    Nolan: So basically, a scientist wants to rebuild his son, decides "No, this is WAY too fucked up", and pretty much throws him away.

    Pan: (Explaining Astro Boy's backstory) No, he gets VAPORIZED, and that's it, that's the little boy. The kid is FUCKING dead.
  • This classic exchange:
    Pan: You idiot.
    Nolan: And I thought it was a joke on the term ni-(BOING!) or something.
    Pan: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY!?!
    Ken: Nolan...
    Nolan: Uh oh, Spaghetti-Os.
    Pan: You said the N word you stupid idiot!
    Ken: Yeah! -You stupid ni-(BOING!)
    Pan: WHAT THE FUCK KEN!?
    (Nolan laughs)
    Pan: Ken you're Black, it's okay.
    • Bonus points for "Teach the World to Fap" by ZONE-SAMA playing in the background and stopping to a halt when the Sound-Effect Bleep occurs.

4 - Disney Channel Original Movies
  • The mere fact that Pan, Ken, and Nolan are allegedly at the now-infamous Dashcon.
  • The various things he and his friends describe about the ball pit.
  • Ken reveals he thought Halloweentown was about a town full of Michael Myers', which escalates into a Running Gag of thinking every DCOM involved Michael Myers in some way.
  • Pan gets killed (by Jihad's suicide bomb) towards the end and his "ghost" fills in for him.
  • When Pan makes a joke in poor taste, The Rebelsquad proceeds to abandon him, especially after this:
    Nolan: "Were you masturbating!?"
    Pan: "Yes."
    Ken: "Oh god, I'm slipping in it! Oh god, it got in my mouth!"

5 - Favorite Short Lived Cancelled Cartoons

6 - Movies Based on Cartoons

7 - Teen Titans Animated / Favorite Simpsons Episodes

8 - Live Action Teen Titans TV and Spider-Man Cartoon Games Retrospect
  • The joke of XLR stumbling onto the podcast with AJ believing he would receive a free burrito unaware of the podcast in progress, and the Rebelsquad's reaction to the above.
  • Pan mistaking Stan Lee as the owner of Playboy.
9 - Hub Channel Ending / Early 2000s Nickelodeon
  • The Rebelsquad's reaction to Pan realizing they forgot to talk about CatDog.
    Pan: HOLY FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
    Beat
    Ken: "I quit..."
    Nolan: "Yeah, bye."
  • During an awkward moment when Pan leaves, we hear him trip in his hallway:
    Pan: OH FUCK!
    Nolan: *snickers*
  • Pan calls fans of XJ9 "mainstream jacker offers".
10 - Crossovers / Adventure Time Creator Quits / Food Fight / Tetris Film

11 - Dish Removes Cartoon Network
  • Nolan blowing up at the others for insulting Nestle Wonder Balls.
    Nolan: "I did not agree, to fucking sit here, and listen to one of my favorite childhood candies, get SHAT ON, by you FUCKING degenerates! This is BULLSHIT!"
  • Ken's suggesting an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? to talk about.
    Pan: "But you know what was the scariest episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
    Ken: "The one with the actual black guy and they went all like "Oh my god, the dark!' and they all ran away?"
  • After Pan brings up the fact his teacher was once in a porno, Nolan calls him out and explains how fans will find out who the teacher is:
    Nolan: They're gonna look Pan-Pizza in the high school website and find you! Who the fuck else is named Pan-Pizza!?

12 - Toy Story 4 / Gorillaz 2017 Album / Pixar
Ken: Come on everyone! Let's all sing the incest song! Incest, incest, it's the best! Put your sister to the test!
Pan: *bursts out laughing*

13 - I Screwed Up Oh God! / QnA Time
  • The Running Gag of meeting Jim and the rest of the podcasters at your local K-Mart with $100. "Don't call us, WE'LL call you."

14 - Animated Superhero Films / Star Wars Jizz / Cartoon Lawsuit
  • Jim and "Jizz music", especially the ensuing puns.
  • Pan concluding that Team Coco Pebbles vs Team Fruity Pebbles is actually a cover for the agenda: Black People vs Homosexuals. The sheer tastelessness is lampshaded as a Nolan joke.
    • In the same vein, because Pan and Ceshira are Mexican, Ken balances the races out by declaring Jim Black, much to his confusion.

15 - Nicktoons Terrorist / CGI Mario Movie

16 - Remembering Christine Cavanugh / Creepypastas and Off Topics

17 - Best / Worst US Remakes / TGWTG Disaster / Award Shows Hate Animation

18 - Animated Music Video / Toonami Ending? / Gorillaz Phase 4

19 - Web Cartoons / INVADER ZIM Revival / ZELDA TV Series

20 - ADVENTURE TIME The Movie / Steven Universe / Uncle Grandpa CROSS OVER

21 - Toy Story 4 Romantic Comedy / Tim Burton's DUMBO / Ghost Busters Sell Out
  • Pan and Jim's conversation while impersonating the Beatles.
  • The return of Gables.
  • Their claims that the Air Buddies contributed to the bombing of the World Trade Center on 9/11, also framing the basketball coach as he's sent to a jail/mental asylum.

22 - Futurama / KIDS NEXT DOOR Revival / PIXELS Movie
  • Scooby-Doo IS: The Dog With A Blog (Stan).

23 - SHREK / G:KND update / 5 DISNEY Live Action Remakes Announced
  • The Rebel Squad in a previous podcast said they should do a Shrek podcast; guess what today's podcast is about?
  • Ken's first absence because of his computer not working due to water damage, which the remaining Rebel Squad thinking that he masturbated to Puella Magi Madoka Magica and jizzed on his computer causing the malfunction.
  • Specifically Sayaka Miki
  • After Pan brings up leaks, we have the best joke:
    Pan: So who knows what else might get leaked...
    Jim: Is that a threat?
    Pan: Yes.
    Nolan:Hopefully not my nudes!

24 - TOY CARTOONS / Scooby Doo Meets KISS / 5 Nights@FREDDIES Film

25 - MARVEL Phase 1 / New DBZ Series / NINTENDO Theme Park
  • The return of Paleo after all his sarcastic comments left on all the podcasts since the one he was in.
  • Pan requesting donations for his hospitalized female "Tsundere" friend to which he dubs the charity: "Get Well Tsundere."

28 - Pizza Party Podcast - POWERPUFF Girls Recasted - Ben 10 Reboot - E3
  • Ken's udder confusion to Pan's shocking announcement...
    Pan: We have some Phantom Menace news!
    Ken: What?
    Pan: We have some Phantom Menace news, Ken!
    Ken: What?

38 - Halloween
  • When Pan was a little kid, he wanted to be Darth Vader for Halloween. Problem was that he didn't know his name, so he wanted to be "the black guy from Star Wars; Nolan and Jim then ask if he meant Lando Calrissian.

43 - XXX-Treme Ghostbusters - Lost Star Wars Cartoon
  • Pan's crazy laughter over the Professor Xavier action figure. It goes on for over a whole minute.

50 - Is Dreamworks Doomed? / Space Jam 2 / Featuring Some Call Me Johnny

53 - FEET Neros Q / Stupid CENSORSHIP / New MEGAMAN Show
  • The fact that Neros Q is even on the podcast in the first place. Neros responded to Pan's videos regarding the 2016 Powerpuff Girls by making two lengthy videos explaining why he's wrong followed by an animation of Neros executing Pan at the end of BOTH videos. Pan finds this hilarious and responds by inviting Neros to join an episode of the podcast. He AGREES.

58 - Long Gone Gulch / Day with SpongeBob SOLVED / Evil Cereal Mascots
  • During a discussion of Fruity Pebbles, the members make an obvious but still funny joke about Barney eating Fred's daughter Pebbles.
  • Pan admits that the bootleg DVD of "A Day With SpongeBob" from his video was actually something he made himself and wasn't donated to him.
    Zach: How am I ever gonna trust you again?
  • Pan mentions that a trailer for a One Piece movie used Avril Lavigne music, prompting Tara to quip "He was a pirate boy!"
  • When answering a fan question about what reboots are better than the original, Zach chimes in:

72-Pizza Party Podcast FT: CR - Steven SAMURAI JACK Universal Tales of Ducks
  • The introduction when Pan jokes about how it's been a while since they ripped on YouTube celebrities:
    Pan: It's been a while, but we haven't talked about YouTubers we hate and you know which YouTuber we hate right now is CR!
    Nolan: Yeah! That motherfucker!
    Izzy: Yeah, what a hack!
    CR: ...Well this is awkward.
    Nolan: Wait, what?
    Pan: Oh fuck!
  • Pan jokingly getting called out on his obsession for Monster High while disregarding the likes of DuckTales and Mickey Mouse (2013).
    Pan: We can't watch every show ever made!
    Izzy: I'm not asking you to watch every show ever made! Apparently you have enough time for Monster High!
    (Everyone bursts into laughter)
    Pan: SHUT UP!

84-Pizza Party Podcast - FT: YMS - Netflix's DEATHNOTE HomeComing on Spiderman
  • Pan getting the deaths of David Carridine (Accidental death by auto-erotic asphyxiation) and Robin Williams (Suicide by strangling himself with a belt) mixed up. The Mood Whiplash hits fast and hilariously.
    Adam: This joke went off the rails...

85-Pizza Party Podcast - The 4th POWERPUFF Girl Rides Netflix's MAGIC SCHOOLBUS to Neo Yokio
  • Pan, Nolan and Izzy randomly declaring Paleo wants to bone a dolphin. Poor Paleo is flummoxed by the whole thing.

    Reviews 
Yogi Bear

Sym-Bionic Titan

Teen Titans Reviews
  • Pan looking back at his old reviews.
    Younger Pan: Hello, people from...
    Pan: Wow, that was awful.
    • Pan mentioning this joke about Tara Strong, when saying how much he liked Raven when the show was still on.
    Pan: An appropriate name, because I like to "Tara" that ass up!
    (Cut to the video salesman from Teen Titans: Trouble in Tokyo winking at Raven, who shudders)

Young Justice/Robotomy

Ultraman

Street Fighter Malibu Comic

Ninja Squad

Cartoon Network: Punch Time Explosion

Rugrats: The Search for Reptar

The Smurfs

Problem Solverz

GoldenEye: Rogue Agent

Dan Vs.

Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi

The Looney Tunes Show

Phineas and Ferb

Rave Master

Almost Naked Animals

Star Fox: Assault

Beavis And Butthead

Top 10 Disappointing Games

Secret Mountain Fort Awesome

My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic

Adventure Time Reviews

Cartoon Network: Punch Time Explosion XL

Red Steel

Level Up

Toonami Retrosepctive
  • At the end of part 1 of his Toonami retrospective. Just the casual way Pan says: ''Some people say Toonami was just a bunch of bumpers. I say those people are a bunch of cunts.

Legend Of Korra

Skullgirls

Lollipop Chainsaw

Annoying Orange

Gravity Falls

Super Smash Bros. Melee
  • Pan getting an up-skirt shot of Peach (and Link).
Johnny Test

Jet Set Radio

The Powerpuff Girls

Megas XLR

Top 10 Worst Cartoon Network Moments

Bravest Warriors

Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt

RebelTaxi Hates 90s Kids

Incredible Crew/Nick Studio 10

Crazy Taxi/The Simpsons Road Rage
  • Pan commenting on all the alternatives to Crazy Taxi.
  • After Pan realizes how disturbing the game is without the sound-track, he asks for the "cheery" music to come back on.
    ""The Offspring:"" An angry man gets drunk and beats his kid/the same old way his drunken father did.
Teen Titans Go!

Top 6 Cartoon Network Pilots

Code Lyoko
  • Here's an.....interesting critical quote for you:
    Pan: "This show is darker then the neighborhoods I don't drive through."

Sanjay and Craig

Minority Report: The Game
  • A lot of the latter half of this review. ESPECIALLY the part where he mentions a lot of the cheat codes.
    • There is also this particular line from the aforementioned review:
    Pan: Anderson Cooper! Watched the movie Looper! Does not feature Bradley Cooper!

Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann

Xiaolin Showdown Chronicles

Uncle Grandpa

Top 10 Failed Animated Pilots

Creepy Disturbing Cartoon Moments
  • The Unfortunate Implications of Nick or Treat.
    So next Halloween, go out to the scariest, darkest neighborhoods you can find, and you SHOW them you're a Nickelodeon '90s kid by shouting the phrase, "NI—" (cut to colorbar and long bleep)
    • On his later Top 10 Worst NICKELODEON Moments & Controversies video, someone asked what was so bad about Nick Or Treat. Pan's response?
    "Say it three times fast."

Regular Show Mordecai and Rigby Trapped 8-Bit Land

Steven Universe

Top 5 Animated Pilots & Shorts 2
  • Pan says that he intended to put the Amazing Screw-On Head in the first Top 10 Failed Animated Pilots list, but forgot about it until editing at 5 PM. He also noted that a lot of people noticed that he put the porn parody of The Modifyers in his video, and does not want to talk about it.

Top Ten Best Movies and Cartoons for Gamers

Rick and Morty

Top 10 Ugliest Cartoons

Space Dandy

The Powerpuff Girls Danced Pantsed

Top 10 Creepy Disturbing Invader Zim Episodes

Wander over Yonder

Tony Hawk's Pro Skater Retrospective

Ed, Edd n Eddy

Top 10 Lovable Jerks
  • While describing the Tsundere character, clips of Gaz from Invader Zim are shown. When the first one comes up, the caption reads "That show with Gir".
  • Also when describing the Tsundere, he has this to say:
    Pan: Cold and hard on the outside, warm and soft on the inside. And I want to get cold and hard on Raven's warm soft insides!
    Robin: Eat it! She's gonna eat it!
    Starfire: Mmm! Mmm! She's gonna EAT IT!
    Cyborg: Meat-meat-meat-meat-meat-meatball! Meat-meat-meat-meat-meat-meatball!

Clarence

When Are You Too Old to be Watching Cartoons or Anime?:

Top 10 Worst Redesigns
  • Pan complains about the failed US Sailor Moon remake, where the titular character isn't attractive, before somebody (Nolan) tells him that she's only 14.
    • Then Zone-Tan shows up and tells him the age of consent in Japan is 14.
    Robin: Pack your things, we're heading for Tokyo.
  • Jake Long makes me want to stroke my Jake Shlong! *ding!*
  • His criticism of TOM's redesign:
    "That means MORE MONEY had to be put in to animate his facial expressions. Why would you do that? You're already teetering on cancellation as it i- aaaaaand it's cancelled." (beat) "But now it's back and for adults so it's all cool."
  • He describes Toonami shifting its demographic to "stupid babies who don't know how to use the internet".
  • When listing off the honorable mentions, he lists the time he had a nose and the time he drew Zone-Tan in his style... the latter of which happened mere seconds ago.
  • As he's about to close out the video, the cops show up.
    Pan: The cops found me! I didn't do anything wrong yet! I gotta get to Japan! Where I'll be free. Free to do what I want. Pan Pizza: Trouble In Tokyo! Only in theaters July 3rd! Rated PG.

Are Kids Today Stupid?
  • He talks about loving the soundtrack from Pokémon: The First Movie as a kid and his older cousin hating it. Now...
    Yeah, that soundtrack was terrible, oh my god! Today you're all complaining about Justin Bieber and One Direction, in the 90's we had 98 Degrees and... Aaron Carter... (shudders)
    • Then he decides to listen to it again for the first time in years.
    M2M: ♪Got introduced to you by a friend...
    Pan: (retches) Yeah, it is terrible.
    • "So was I a stupid child for liking it, and are you stupid, too? No. You're stupid in general, but not for that."
  • Pan mentions his favorite messages he often gets:
    "You like [blank], I lost my respect for you." Basically, this comment means, "PEOPLE LIKE THINGS I DON'T LIKE!"

Top 10 Animated Bands

Breadwinners
  • How does Pan open the video?
    Pan: HOLY FUCK.
  • When he tries to explain that the two main characters are ducks that look like frogs, he initially gets the two animals mixed up. And then...
    Buhdeuce: But I don't think I look anything like a frog-
    Pan: (Slightly slurred) Don't you fucking lie to yourself, you look exactly like a frog!
  • The show is about the two main ducks delivering bread to other ducks, and then Pan explains that you shouldn't feed ducks bread since they could choke, so the show is essentially supporting animal abuse.
    • And this inspires Pan to create a new show: "Tyler Perry presents: Madea Feeds the Dog Chocolate See What Fuck'N Happens".
  • In an attempt to make the show more "hip" for the target demographic, the main characters names are Buhdeuce and Sway Sway.
    Pan: Now, you ask, "which is which"? I don't care.
    • Continuing on that theme, he comes up with some catchphrases.
    Pan: 2 Hetero 4 the Metro, Otto Rocket asphyxiation, Neon Genesis Ellen DeGeneres.
  • How Pan closes the video:
    Pan: Breadwinners is terrible, I want Raven to choke me while I scream.
  • Meta: This video garnered enough attention from the show's haters that it got taken down for "copyright" by its parent network. Sure, let's go with that, Nickelodeon.

Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie

Top 10 Worst Cartoon / Anime Intro Theme Songs

Dragonball Evolution
  • Pan's reaction to the Kamehameha attack being referred as "air-bending"...
    Pan: Air-bending...is from Avatar! This movie is like you got your mom to write the script! No, Mom, that is NOT a Pikachu, it is Agumon and he is from DIGIMON!!!!!
    • Heck, the entire review could be considered this, since he reviews the movie while drunk.
    Pan: If you're not in the know, this film is based on several Japanese cartoons and chronics: Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball G-... Dragon Ball Z...
  • Playing audio from Munky Cheez'' over Not!Goku's transformation into the Oozaru.
  • "Oh, hey! Ben 10's here! Whats up, you not fucking anime! Get the fuck out, asshole!"

Over the Garden Wall

Did You Know Animation: Regular Show

Did You Know Animation: The Incredibles
  • Pan mentions how he expected a sequel to the The Incredibles after seeing commercials for Rise of the Underminer
    That second Incredibles movie is coming out! (shows Cars poster) It's right around the corner! (shows Ratatouille poster) Right around the corner... (shows WALL•E poster, then Up poster) Yeah... (shows Toy Story 3 poster, Pan is laughing a little) It's comin' out... (shows Cars 2 poster, Pan is practically in hysterics) It's gonna come out, guys! (shows Brave poster) It's coming out! (shows Monsters University poster) Just... You just wait! (starts crying) They're never gonna do it!

Game Boy Advance Video
  • Pan lists off the shows the GBA Video has:
  • Pan talks about how the original GBA models didn't come with backlights like the SP model or all current electronics, meaning that if a road trip goes into the night...
    Pan: I guess father wouldn't mind me turning on one of these car lights...
    (turns light on)
    Pan's Dad: TURN OFF THE LIGHT, I CAN'T SEE!
    Pan: Yes father! (turns it off)
  • And when he gets fed up with the Niko Worm Light:
    Pan: You know what, fuck it, I'm turning this light on.
    Pan's Dad: OH GOD I CAN'T SEE!
    (cut to a car crashing and someone falling out)
  • "Aw shit, son! It's Rugrats All Grown Up! It's the Dragon Ball Z of Rugrats!
  • Pan describes the low resolution as "tolerable... like, segregation... I GUESS it could be worse."
  • Pan mentions that the GBA Video website is still up.
    • It went down. Pan inadvertently may have helped kill it by drawing attention to it.
  • Pan describes the brightness adjuster allowing you to give the film "a nice mayonnaise abortion aesthetic".
  • One of the pros of GBA Video is the inclusion of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, "the best episode of SpongeMan"... at 240x160 resolution. Then it cuts to a tiny Game Boy in the center showing the episode at its actual resolution, compared to the video's 1920x1080.
  • Pan notes that two 30-minute episodes on cartridge comes for "the low price of 20 buttfucks". He then notes that almost the same price can buy an entire season of a show for your iPod.
    Pan: For 20 bucks I can buy the Season Four box set of Adventure Time, and give Marceline a kiss on the lips!
  • "Hey guys, you wanna watch Shrek? You wanna come over to my house, and frickin' watch a 90 minute movie of Shrek, ON MY GAME BOY ADVANCE? Cuz we'll do it!"
    • "You can count the frames per second, there's like... three."
  • The above becomes funnier when someone said that in the comments, that something very similar happened in real life.
    RadioactiveSkulls: I remember in grade 3 someone in my school had a game boy video Shrek cartridge and about 30 kids all huddled around the gameboy would watch it.

    On a tiny ass screen.

    30 kids.
    • Pan's response to the above is also funny.
      Pan-Pizza: Oh my god....

Top 10 WORST 2Edgy Hip EXTREME Cartoons

Jackie Chan Adventures

Top 10 animated GOTH girls (NSFW)
  • The opening:
    Pan: Hi. Do you want to date a dark girl, but are deeply afraid of minorities?
  • "Top ten goths, YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUHH!!!!"
    • And from the description:
  • Pan attempts to distract himself from the horrible implications of Gothitelle being able to see when its trainer is going to die by drawing attention to its stubby little legs and calling it a hotdog.
  • This glorious bit of trolling:
    Pan: People say I don't talk enough about Ruby, and I'm like: "I love Ruby!" (beat) Ruby Gloom!
    Pan: Now, as I was saying about Ruby- oh hey, Panty and Stocking!
  • Pan adds an MLG "OOOOOHHH!" sound after Ruby tells Misery "bad things happen to [Misery] when it's not raining".
  • When Pan makes the mistake of saying that lolitas are great while talking about Stocking:
    Cop: Police! Get on the ground! Get on the ground! *Sirens whale in the background as footage from "Death Race 2010" plays*
    Pan: Whoa whoa whoa, okay, wait. Lolis and Lolita complex, that's bad. Lolita fashion, that's something completely different. It's really cool, you should see it.
  • Pan shows a seemingly innocent clip from Teen Titans... that turns out to be from one of Zone's porn parodies.
    • This comment on Zone:
    Pan: Nobody knows who they are, but hopefully they're single...
    Pan: Shut up!
  • This rather accurate description of the conflict of Game Slave 2:
    Pan: There's a midnight sale for an overhyped video game, but Gaz didn't pre-order, for she is a filthy casual. And then this other fuck who probably shits into KFC buckets while surfing Reddit, claims to be the last guy who pre-ordered.
  • Before Pan can announce the number one spot, his little sister CISter barges in.
  • When Pan finally runs out of dirty jokes to make about Raven, he goes into a Heroic B.S.O.D..
    Pan: Adios, my sweet ravioli.

Top 10 Lost Unfinished Cartoons & Anime

Scooby-Doo and the Cyber Chase
  • Pan's reaction to the end of a commercial advertising the home video release of Scooby-Doo and the Cyber Chase ending with an explosion:
    "Oh good, the movie exploded! Now we don't have to watch it anymore!"
  • Pan calls Scooby-Doo the Call of Duty of animation.
  • STATE UNIVERSITY
  • After hearing that one of the scientists is named "Macklemore", Pan inserts some predictable music.
  • Pan notes how the gang has no trouble risking their lives to save a virtual pterodactyl, but leave a virtual princess tied up to presumably get eaten by a dragon.
  • "Incest, incest, it's the best! Put your sister to the test!"
  • When the Phantom Virus reveals his face, "Surprise, motherfucker!" is played over the scene.
    • The second time it happens, "WTF BOOM" is used instead.
  • "It's a Scooby Doo reunion! Remember classic monsters like the Creeper, and..." (montage of more obscure Scooby Doo villains)
  • Pan rages about the fact that it took the gang 32 years (at the time of release) to wise up to the "Scooby-Doo" Hoax trope, and how they chose the worst possible time to do so.
    Pan: But the one time, THE ONE. SINGLE TIME. In the entire series. Of Scooby Doo. As far as I know. They finally learn from past events, and think "Huh, all those other monsters were people in costumes. Maybe this time it'll also be a guy in a costume." As it turns out, they're not guys in costumes. They're legit, virtual monsters!
    • Pan then invokes the question of "Now What?" if they actually were guys in costumes.
    Pan: Aw man! I was gonna slice you open and sleep inside you, but you unmasked me. (sighs) Darn...
  • "Hey kids, if you're too skinny, or too overweight, and don't have this particular body type, Daphne HATES YOU."
  • Pan rages about the fact Shaggy only just now remembers the magnets the professor gave them, then rages about how a magnetic field was blocked by his pants, ranting that magnets don't work that way.
  • Pan wonders how the virtual gang is doing after finding out they're forced to spend eternity in the virtual world. Cut to the gang staring at the arcade flashing lightning while Running in the 90's plays.
    "Yeah, that's what I thought."
  • "Your ass is grass, Jimmy Olsen! And I've got the weed! (inhales, then starts coughing) Ooooohhhh, fuck!"
  • Pan is baffled by the fact that the villain tried to kill Scooby and the gang as part of the plan he formed after he was denied "some scientist prize project".
    Pan: What started out as vandalism, turned into attempted murder. Looks like this criminal's... a douchebag! I'm Sheriff John Bunnell, and Scooby Doo fuckin' sucks!

Did You Know Animation: Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Osmosis Jones

Top 10 Best Cartoon Perverts

Super Duper Sumos review

J Stars Victory VS review
  • The beginning:
    Pan: "Man, oh man, I love shitting on the floor of my grandma's house!"
    Dad: "I love Japan, period."

The LEGALLY BANNED SPONGEBOB Episode
  • After spending almost the entire video talking about how rare the mockumentary is, he reveals he was donated a bootleg of the film. Pan loads it up, shivering with anticipation...
    "Are you middle-aged adults ready to watch some porn?!"
    Pan: Um, excuse me?
    • ...it turns out to be a SpongeBob porn parody called SpongeKnob SquareNuts, which consists of a live-action SpongeKnob, Sandy, and Patrick having sex to "Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the Moonlight".
    • "One pair of pants later."
    • He later revealed in a Pizza Party Podcast that the bootleg was something he made himself when it was discovered the film was never actually made.
  • Earlier in the video, Pan mentions a Mean Girls Nintendo DS game, which has no screenshots, videos, or even a ROM to emulate. Not long after the video went up, searches for it increased.
  • Pan watches a Justin Bieber documentary by the same company... and gets a kid who definitely isn't Bieber.
    "I wanted Justin Bieber but all I got was...Cheapy the Cheapskate!"
    • This line preceding it.
      "That's not Justin Bieber! That's… that's Justin's Beaver!"
  • "Is Isreal Real?"

Top 10 WORST RICH / GREEDY Animated Characters
  • Rebel Taxi pointing out how White's real name "Weiss Schnee", followed by:
    White: You complete dolt!
    Pan: (In a overly nerdy voice) Weiss Schneeee! Weiss Schneeee! WEISS SCH...
    (Breaks into a coughing fit, music cuts)
    • After a long beat, this happens:
    Pan: Weiss Schnee, I hate you. Please marry me, I'll be your trophy husband.
  • Pan putting an entire film, being The Lorax on the list for being hypocritical and for selling out.
  • He puts the Saving the Orphanage Trope as a contender. What he decides to dedicate it to is even funnier considering how fast he says it and how it breaks the rules a third time.
  • The ending:
    Pan: Do you fear a robot uprising? Well I fear a corporate uprising, and they already won.
    (Terminator music plays)
    Mom (Futurama): Everyone, help Mom find her Bra.
    (Music keeps playing)
  • The Stinger: "I await your Money"

Jem and the Holograms
  • How does the review start? The poster for the film accompanied by "HOLY SHIT!"
  • Pan notes how Jimmy Neutron told pretty much the same story as the 2 hour film in 15 minutes.
    Carl: I want a drum SOLO!
  • "Take a hike, DICK!"
  • Pan pronouncing Aubrey Peeples as "Aubrey Pipples".
  • The director's other work includes G.I. Joe: Retaliation...and two Justin Bieber documentaries.
  • Pan thinks the lead actress would make a good Asuka, and since the character is American (actually half-German), it's not whitewashing.
  • Pan criticizes the movie for its celebrity "cameos" that are just poor-quality archive videos taken out of context, then compares it to a Curious George movie with a "cameo" from Kanye West.
  • When noting that the film cuts to low-quality YouTube videos of aspiring musicians that have nothing to do with Jem in the middle of scenes and transitioning using Google Earth with the Google logo and copyright clearly visible, Pan is impressed the movie didn't open with a Windows Movie Maker title.
    "Jem! The Movie! By Epic Wafflez Productions! Plz like and subscribe! XD!"
  • The "Pathetic! Fucking shameless!" Ad-Break Double-Take.
  • According to Pan, there were 6 people (himself included) in the theater. On opening day.

Top 5 HALLOWEEN Special Hidden Gems
  • When discussing Repo! The Genetic Opera:
    Some of the songs reek of Teen girl angst. And I mean teen girl who just got off watching Foamy The Squirrel on Newgrounds.com while signing a "Bring Back Invader Zim" petition wearing a Jack Skeleton Hoodie And Happy Tree Friends tube socks purchased from Hot Topic during an Emily the Strange buy 1 get 1 50 percent-off sale where she discovered Serenity Rose from Slave Labor graphics Comics while her over baring but loving father restricts her from going to the My Chemical Romance/Limp Bizkit concert with a 5 years older than her boyfriend that constantly IM’s unsourced Stolen Pom And Zi comic art over 56K Modem American Online trial discs on myspace.com with a top 8 consisting of Tim Burton, Jack Sparrow, Eminem, Jesus Christ and whatever angsty band is the hit new thing on Disney Adventures Magazine and spends all day filling out "What Kingdom Hearts Character Are You?" quizzes only to complain she didn’t get Rikku and is unable to watch the 2003 MTV Music Awards because her deadbeat older brother is always hogging the living room TV playing Tony Hawk's Underground on his Halo edition Transparent green Xbox using a 3rd party Mad Kats air flow controller with a busted analog stick constantly leaning to the right making antisemitic remarks on how Eric stole his wicked Mctwist over the helicopter in Hawaii footage."
    • The entire time he's saying the above, a picture of his CISter Emily Vasquez comes up on screen and is slowly being zoomed in on. Emily's biggest character trait is she's one big example of early to mid-00s "poser emo/goth" girls who perfectly fit the description Pan is giving.
    • And it lasts over a minute.

Jimmy Neutron

Top 10 Worst NICKELODEON Moments & Controversies
  • When mentioning Spongebob, he defends it, saying that while it's been running for many years, it doesn't do what another long running show does.
    Pan: And hey, at least Spongebob never added more main characters with each new season like: a baby named Toot, Sparky the dog, neighbor girl Chloe, Frankenstein, Sleepy Gary, Photography Raptor, Mr. Beauregard, Summer, and Mr. Poopybutthole, that guy was the best!
  • Nick News with Linda Ellerbee:
    Pan: Ugh, I wanna watch KaBlam!
    • "This is Nick News; if you wanna know...ass."
  • Toward the tail end of Number 4, talking about Fred, Pan mentions the identity of Fred's father, acting like he's going to set up the obvious joke only to instead whisper "John Cena" with a tiny picture of Cena in the center of a black screen. It goes to #3 like nothing happened, and then...
    Pan: The Worldwide Day ofJOHN CENAAAA!!!
  • Pan mentions how during the Worldwide Day of Play he along with other kids would do the obvious, and just change the channel to Cartoon Network, rather than go outside.

Top 10 WORST Animated REBOOTS REVIVALS
  • When Pan listed all of the reboots of classic shows taking place in the future, like Gilligan's Planet, Fonz and the Happy Days Gang, he lists Generation Z in poor Spanish.
    Pan: I'm Hispanic and my Spanish is shit!
  • The WatchMojo reference at the end.
    "Do you agree with our list? If not, go fuck yourself. I'm Pan-Pizza for WatchMojo tellin' you all to suck my dick...BITCH!"
  • For number 6, Pan opts to keep it simple.
    Pan: Scooby-Doo.
    That's enough.
    Just stop.

Megaman
  • Just... the whole episode. There are too many moments to list.

Top LOST/UNFINISHED/BANNED Cartoons and Anime (Vol 2)

The Truth Behind RAPSITTIE KIDS
  • Near the beginning of the video:
    Pan Pizza: Oh wow, where to start? These kids are so ugly that Jared from Subway wouldn't kidnap them. And look at these houses; were they constructed on the first Sims video game? How this was found and why this was made is a story that involves a possible scam artist, acclaimed voice actors, and scientology. I'm not kidding. We'll get into that after I make fun of- er, REVIEW this film.
  • His rather...heated tirade towards one of the bullies after they make an insult.
    Todd: So, you're shopping at the dumpster? Do they take credit cards?
    Pan Pizza: Um, obviously not. What stupid logic would that be? A dumpster taking credit cards? What sort of economic service could a dumpster provide that requires a built in credit and debit card reader? For what reason would a dumpster need that?! Did you fucking think about that you fuck ginger piece of red haired stepchild shit monger?! Goddamn, I wish I could choke you like I choke my dick but I'd rather not get another boner in public! Holy shit, I hope it's kick-a-ginger day every day in this rat-hole you call a town where you'll be working in as a manure shoveler one day while you raise a kid from a broken condom! SO NO, I DON'T THINK THE DUMPSTER TAKES CREDIT CARDS! (Does a big sigh) Ok.

5 CARTOONISTS Who HATED Their Work
  • Pan Pizza: Former storyboard artist Eric Molinsky was tired of all those pieces of Rugrats fan art portraying them as perfect skinny hipster supermodel, Forever 21, Starbucks drinking, internet startup, 20-something, Tinder, Tumblr, Uber driver, Instagram, Arizona green tea, waste-high jean shorts, #Sailor Moon Pastel Goth iPhone case... versions of the Rugrats, *phew*.

Top 10 WORST Animated CARTOON Moments of 2016

SHREK XBOX Extra Large Game? Review???
  • Pan's reference when he puts the game in the system.
    Pan: You know who I love? That one reviewer who says "let's pop this game in" and he throws the game into the console in a funny way. You know the one I'm talking about.
  • Pan constantly compares Shrek's movement speed to Sonic the Hedgehog.
  • Pan talks about how the first stage of most platform games feature green grass and blue skies. Then he shows off the first true level in Shrek: a dirty, disgusting factory.
    Pan: Wow. This place fuckin' sucks. Welcome to Euro Disneyland, kids. This is where my animation dreams died.
  • When Shrek is tasked with farting on a disco cow, Pan questions how this is a good deed.
    Pan: I heard cows were one of the biggest producers for greenhouse gasses for their bodily functions, so maybe this is environmentalist revenge?
    Cut to Shrek beating up the cow
    Pan: Destroy the ozone layer, will you? This one's for Al Gore!
    Shrek: (Chasing after the cow.) Come back here! I'm not finished with you! (Falls to his death) DAMN!!!!!
  • Pan considers the idea of Seth Green as a bully to be most unrealistic part of 100 Deeds for Eddie McDowd.
    Pan: If you're being bullied by Seth Green, game over. You might as well be getting bullied by Glass Joe.
  • Pan's bewilderment over the "hints" on the Shrek DVD.

The Nutshack
  • The fact that Pan thinks he created The Nutshack meme. Why? Well, according to him, after he created his Top 10 Worst Cartoon/Anime Theme Songs, YouTube user SilvaGunner saw his video and created several remixes with the Nutshack theme.
    • We learn that SilvaGunner contacted Pan once, and asked him this question:
      "Hey, you wanna do a song for us? We know your little CISter can sing!"
    • What song did SilvaGunner make after contacting Pan? A remix of Snow Halation sampling his voice that claimed to be the song All I Want from Crazy Taxi!
  • Pan calling Five Nights at Freddy's "Five Nights at Fuckboy's".
  • Pan's reaction to SilvaGunner's upload of Circus (Zeta Mix), which is actually a remix of the Nutshack theme:
    That's not from the game! Or is it? I never played it!
  • The Title Card shown before the actual review starts:
    The Nutshack: The Final Chapter: You can (not) Nut
  • "After watching an episode, oh, I'm sorry, after tolerating an episode, I see The Nutshack is a raunchy adult cartoon about Filipinos living in the city."
  • Pan thinking that the fact that The Nutshack is the first cartoon by and for Filipinos would be like if the first black American president was Tyler Perry with Flava Flav as vice president.
  • Pan not being able to determine whether Chita is wearing a beanie or a Chinese conical hat on her head.
  • Pan playing a few seconds of the audio of the first cutscene of Hotel Mario over a walk cycle from the show.
  • Pan reveals that The Nutshack theme isn't the worst theme song he's ever heard: that award goes to the French Dragon Ball Z theme song, which has a music video for the extended version with the singer green-screened onto clips of the anime.
  • After Pan says that since The Nutshack is close to being a Japanese anime because it was created in the Philippines, which is in Asia, he plays a clip of a Nutshack-themed parody of the Neon Genesis Evangelion intro.
  • Pan playing a clip of Slipnutz after saying that the Nutshack's theme isn't as classic as that nut-based group.
  • Since the DVD box set of The Nutshack series is hard to find, Pan asked his Twitter followers to send in the DVD of the series, and three people obliged to his request. One sent an official DVD box set, one sent a bootleg box set with blank DVDs containing MP4 rips of the episodes from YouTube, and one sent him a DVD of the show from Netflix:
    "Am I supposed to send this back? I am not responsible for your Netflix account! No, I am not sending back this back until whoever did this apologizes to me for this bullshit! The nerve of you to expect responsibility out of me..."
  • "I did some research, and by 'research', I mean I read Wikipedia articles, and by 'read Wikipedia articles', I meant I hit Control+F and found the two creators of the show."
  • Pan's response to a comment one of the hosts of the show Vinyl Addiction, a show one of the creators of the Nutshack worked on, saying that vinyl figures are an "underground" thing:
    Not anymore!
    (The Sad Trombone sound effect plays while a picture of a Funko Pop! collection is shown on screen) Funko sold out...
  • "Though given my chance to have my work as a Funko Pop! figure, I would totally sell out for them! Hell yeah!"
  • Pan finds out that the official Nutshack website is now a webpage for some Japanese skincare product.
  • Pan uses this infamous quote from Spy Kids 2 to describe how he thinks the cast and crew of The Nutshack think of the show now:
    "Do you think God stays in heaven because he too fears of what is created?" note 
  • "As this video comes to a close, one question remains: What is The Nutshack? The theme song claims "It's the Nutshack, but what is it? Are the characters The Nutshack? Or were we The Nutshack the whole time? We may never know what was going through the minds of these animators...but what we do know is truly, it was the Nutshack!"
  • Pan playing the Jurassic Park theme over behind-the-scenes interviews of the crew who made The Nutshack at the end of the review.
Doogal

  • "A roundabout?"
  • When he recognizes the Weinstein Company's logo, Pan plays a clip of Nathan Lane's joke about the Weinsteins during the presentation of the first Oscar for Best Animated Feature:
    "Up until now, I thought Monsters Incorporated was a documentary on the Weinsteins."
  • "This movie has the wit and charm of a Deadpool cosplayer found in a small town anime convention who voted for Harambe in the election for the sake of getting 3 likes on Facebook."
  • Pan's response to the narrator's first line:
    Narrator: Can you imagine a faraway land where everybody is the best of friends?
    Pan: No, because if everyone is everyone's best friend, we'd be living in a communist friendship society, and I just plain don't like that. How would marriage even work? Polygamy? No, sir! Good luck with your Top 8 on MySpace!
  • Pan just can't resist making blatant references to Jojos Bizarre Adventure due to the fact the movie's original title has the word "Roundabout" in it (ending theme of the first two parts of the series), even mimicking the anime's "To Be Continued" cliffhanger when Zeebad bursts out of the roundabout. He even uses clips from the show to explain the typical structure of a plot.
  • The Running Gag where Pan says that plot elements that get randomly brought up throughout the film should've been explained at the beginning of the movie while showing the scene of the carousel breaking down.
  • "Caramel? Oh no, Doogal! Dogs can't eat that! Don't do this! You have so little to live for!"
  • Pan realizing something during Zeebad and Zebedee's battle:
    Pan: Wait a second...the blue and red...the springs...(The logo for the Nintendo Switch game Arms is shown) Oh no...Did Nintendo rip off Doogal? Find out on Game Theory! You know, the Nintendo game with all the springy arms called "Arms"? It's such a generic name, but this film has proposed what I feel is the perfect title:
    Zeebad: You know, there could only be one spring to rule them all, and I am...The Lord of the Springs!
    Pan: All in favor of that retitle, say "Aye!"
    (Beat)
    Pan: You know what, fuck y'all!
  • "Uh oh, looks like Zebedee is distracted long enough to get ass-blasted from behind!"
  • "They're so close to the diamond, yet Doogal fucks it all up with both his chewing gum and his bad lip-synching!"
  • Pan playing a game of I Don't Know after he gets confused about the fact that the last diamond was inside Soldier Sam:
    What's going on? No one knows! Except I do knows, let's rewind to the beginning of the film, where Doogal bumps the cart!
    (The relevant part of that scene is played where Soldier Sam flies off the carousel.)
    Did you see it? That minion came from there, and guards the roundabout! I know some movies have their foreshadowing be right on the nose and so focused on, but if you blink, you'll miss a necessary detail!
  • Pan's reaction to Emintrude cracking the ice enclosing the carousel with her singing:
    Wait...that really was some regular ice that could've been melted or smashed by conventional means. So, the whole time, her singing could in fact crack that ice! Fire could've melted that ice. It wasn't a magical ice barrier, it was just regular ice that could've been cracked by her singing. The entire reason, the motivation that this dog went out on this mission was a problem that could've been solved literally in the first 10 minutes of this movie! Wow. Fucking wow! If this 2000's movie hired any early 2000's rappers for the soundtrack, it should've been Bow Wow! Incredible. And that's the end of the movie!
  • "Doogal was a moderate financial success, barely breaking even. All the actors in this film continued to have careers, except for Kevin Smith, who suffered a Fate Worse Than Death: being Kevin Smith."

Hop
  • This part after Pan mentions that the animation in the movie looks unfinished in some parts:
    (We cut to a clip from a promotional video for the movie where Russell Brand and a boy beat each other up with fake giant wrapped candies.)
    • And just before the episode ends, he punctuates this with the scene from Mallrats of Jay and Silent Bob going to town on the Eden Prairie Easter Bunny.
  • "Goat sacrifices were traditional and we don't do that anymore. Although this one time when I was 8, I opened up my fridge and my dad brought home a skinned goat wrapped in plastic. But we're Mexican, so it's normal."
  • "Boy, I don't know what they told you on that hippie-ass Tumblr site, but get your ass to work!"
  • Pan's reaction to Fred's sister saying she thinks her parents adopted her because Fred was such a disappointment:
    Damn, bitch! Where'd that come from?
  • Pan calling The Big Bang Theory "The Bing Bong Theory".
  • "Hey Penny, did you remember to wipe his ass for him while you're at it?"
  • Pan imitating Palpatine when Fred is about to kill EB with a rock:
    Do it! Kill the Easter Bunny! Fulfill your destiny! Jesus is the real hero of Easter!
    • After EB wakes up screaming during this scene:
    Pan: Awww, dammit, he's alive! For now...
  • Pan's reaction to The Blind Boys Of Alabama being in the video game studio scene:
    (After a few seconds, the video cuts to an image of kids watching TV with the TV continuing to play the scene.)
    Kid: "Dad, this music sucks, I want to listen to LMFAO!"
  • "Oh, a David Hasselhoff cameo...that was funny WHEN EVERYONE ELSE WAS DOING IT!"
  • Pan thinking that the talent competition arc would end like Johnny from Sing's note  story arc.
  • "Will this human become the Easter Bunny? Find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z!"
  • Pan's reaction to the opening scene of the movie spoiling the fact that Fred O' Hare is the first human Easter Bunny:
    So yeah, the very first minute of the film spoils the ending! Thanks for that! Not that I cared, but still, would've offered a bit of surprise!
  • "Oh no! He left Fred home alone! And he's only 38 years old!"
  • Pan's theory that the Easter Bunnies have injected the chicks with a drug that prevents them from maturing so that the chicks can never overthrow their bunny overlords.
    Jonny 2x4: I told you bunnies would take over the world! And they have!
  • Pan's Running Gag where he constantly thinks EB's father is actually being racist towards Carlos because he's a Mexican:
    • "All this could change if this old fuck would quit it with his traditions and let the rabbit get gay married or whatever metaphor this is supposed to be of, except Carlos is set up to be the villain, all because he's Mexican-all because he's a chicken!"
    • "So why don't you just let him hold it so Carlos does become a bunny? Your only problem with him is that he isn't a bunny, ya fuckin' racist!"
    • "Oh God, those guys in the white hoodies were right...I can't believe this Mexican pollito took their jobs!"
      EB's dad: THEY TOOK OUR JOBS!
    • "Wow. The rabbit would rather give the job to an untrained, inexperienced human than a skilled Mexican." (Beat) "Wait, hang on, no, wait!" (Before Pan has a chance to get angry, the video cuts to colored bars.)
  • Pan playing a clip of Kaneda yelling "TESTUOOOO!" during Carlos' transformation into a bunny.
  • "And wait, how come the Egg of Destiny kept Carlos as a bunny but doesn't turn Fred the human into a bunny? I don't know, this movie is just a bunch of ideas! None of them are fleshed out like it's a first draft! Maybe they rushed it out for Easter and to beat The Smurfs to the box office, a very similar film as I pointed out!"
  • Pan's less-than-a-minute long rewrite of the movie:
    EB: Dad, I don't wanna be the Easter Bunny! I wanna be a drummer!
    EB's dad: Son, you can be both! The Easter Bunny only works one day out of the year!
    EB: Oh, okay!
  • "Fuck this movie and Happy Easter, but not in that order!"

Samurai Jack Retrospective
  • Pan sneaks in a blunt reference to The Nostalgia Critic by riffing his use of the "OF COURSE!" clip from the live-action Street Fighter movie every time someone wants to take over the world with a severely bad quality version of it.
  • The Stinger: Pan vents his feelings about the show's unresolved plot points:
    Pan: WHO THE FUCK IS THIS BITCH (the cloaked woman from Season 5, episode 6 who fans are in an uproar about whose identity it was) AND WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO THIS SCENE!?! (The unceremonious Retcon of a vision of an older Jack in Season 3, episode 6).

How Rugrats Ended 2D Disney Animation

SDCC 2017: BEST/WORST Upcoming 2018 Cartoons Preview Review
  • The "Does he look Laika bitch" shirt.
  • At the Invader Zim panel, the creators went on a 15-minute rant about ghost-hunting shows, which eventually lead to this:
    “Remember when the Honey Comb mascot was a monster?”

DANNY Phantom PLANET Review (@RebelTaxi) 11th WORST Cartoon Ending Ever

    Other Videos 
  • His interview with John R. Dilworth, thought mostly because the interviewee is one of the funniest animators alive:
    Dilworth: HELLO, EVERYBODY, THIS IS JOHN R. DILWORTH!! And the R stands for "Rumplestintskin!"
    Pnan: So, how did you get into animation?
    Dilworth: With a pencil!
    [...]
    Pan: How did you get into art in general?
    Dilworth: With finger paints, man!
    Pan: (starting to crack up): Just answer the question!
    • There's also Dilworth initially refusing to mention School Of Visual Arts by name because he doesn't want to give them notoriety without them paying him.

The 4th Powerpuff Girls POWER of FOUR Review Party (@RebelTaxi) Ft: Nolan



http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/RebelTaxi