Funny: Rebel Taxi

Let's just say driver Pan-Pizza has a twisted sense of humor that's bound to make you fall over laughing.

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    Pizza Party Podcast 
1 - Adventure Time Screws Up

2 - Sonic Cartoons Look Back Retrospective
  • Ken's request for JFK Vines/ #JFKStyle and Nolan's comment on how they will be viewed as terrorists: (Headline) "Local Terrorists Start JFK Vines, more at 11:00." "Apparently they were doing it for the "L-O-L-Zs?"
  • Pan going insane over Chris Thorndyke calling Sonic his only friend.
3 - Johnny Test Cancelled and our Favorite Video Games Based on Cartoons
  • Pan and crew (hopefully jokingly) acting like Fan Haters towards Family Guy, and later a bunch of other things, and suggest the fans kill themselves. It's so rude and uncalled for, yet it's hilarious.
  • Pan starts crying like a little bitch after his friends make fun of his response to Zone on Twitter thanking him for putting Zone-tan in his Top 10 Worst Redesigns video.
    Zone: It was a pleasure working with you.
    Pan: It was a pleasure JERKING with you.
  • The rather blunt explanation of Astro Boy's plot.
    Nolan: So basically, a scientist wants to rebuild his son, decides "No, this is WAY too fucked up", and pretty much throws him away.

    Pan: (Explaining Astro Boy's backstory) No, he gets VAPORIZED, and that's it, that's the little boy. The kid is FUCKING dead.
  • This classic exchange
    Pan: You idiot.
    Nolan: And I thought it was a joke on the term ni-(BOING!) or something.
    Ken: Nolan...
    Nolan: Uh oh, Spaghetti-Os.
    Pan: You said the N word you stupid idiot!
    Ken: Yeah! -You stupid ni-(BOING!)
    (Nolan laughs)
    Pan: Ken you're Black, it's okay.
    • Bonus points for "Teach the World to Fap" by ZONE-SAMA playing in the background and stopping to a halt when the Sound Effect Bleep occurs.

4 - Disney Channel Original Movies
  • The mere fact that Pan, Ken, and Nolan are allegedly at the now-infamous Dashcon.
  • The various things he and his friends describe about the ball pit.
  • Ken reveals he thought Halloweentown was about a town full of Michael Myers', which escalates into a Running Gag of thinking every DCOM involved Michael Myers in some way.
  • Pan gets killed (by Jihad's suicide bomb) towards the end and his "ghost" fills in for him.
  • When Pan makes a joke in poor taste, The Rebelsquad proceeds to abandon him, especially after this:
    Nolan: "Were you masturbating!?"
    Pan: "Yes."
    Ken: "Oh god, I'm slipping in it! Oh god, it got in my mouth!"

5 - Favorite Short Lived Cancelled Cartoons

6 - Movies Based on Cartoons

7 - Teen Titans Animated / Favorite Simpsons Episodes

8 - Live Action Teen Titans TV and Spider-Man Cartoon Games Retrospect
  • The joke of XLR stumbling onto the podcast with AJ believing he would receive a free burrito unaware of the podcast in progress.
  • Pan, Ken, and Nolan's reaction to the above.
  • Pan mistaking Stan Lee as the owner of Playboy.
9 - Hub Channel Ending / Early 2000s Nickelodeon
  • The Rebelsquad's reaction to Pan realizing they forgot to talk about CatDog.
    Ken: "I quit..."
    Nolan: "Yeah, bye."
10 - Crossovers / Adventure Time Creator Quits / Food Fight / Tetris Film

11 - Dish Removes Cartoon Network
  • Nolan blowing up at the others for insulting Nestle Wonder Balls.
    Nolan: "I did not agree, to fucking sit here, and listen to one of my favorite childhood candies, get SHAT ON, by you FUCKING degenerates! This is BULLSHIT!"
  • Ken's suggesting an episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark? to talk about.
    Pan: "But you know what was a really scary episode of Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
    Ken: "You mean the episode with an actual black guy and said "Oh no, the dark!" and just ran away?"

12 - Toy Story 4 / Gorillaz 2017 Album / Pixar

13 - I Screwed Up Oh God! / QnA Time
  • The Running Gag of meeting Jim and the rest of the podcasters at your local K-Mart with $100. "Don't call us, WE'LL call you."

14 - Animated Superhero Films / Star Wars Jizz / Cartoon Lawsuit
  • Jim and "Jizz music", especially the ensuing puns.
  • Pan concluding that Team Coco Pebbles vs Team Fruity Pebbles is actually a cover for the agenda: Black People vs Homosexuals. The sheer tastelessness is lampshaded as a Nolan joke.
    • In the same vein, because Pan and Ceshira are Mexican, Ken balances the races out by declaring Jim Black, much to his confusion.

15 - Nicktoons Terrorist / CGI Mario Movie
  • Nolan, Pan and Ken spend the entire podcast talking about how The Interview is going to cause North Korea to start a nuclear war. Come the end of the podcast, well.....

16 - Remembering Christine Cavanugh / Creepypastas and Off Topics

17 - Best / Worst US Remakes / TGWTG Disaster / Award Shows Hate Animation

18 - Animated Music Video / Toonami Ending? / Gorillaz Phase 4

19 - Web Cartoons / INVADER ZIM Revival / ZELDA TV Series

20 - ADVENTURE TIME The Movie / Steven Universe / Uncle Grandpa CROSS OVER

21 - Toy Story 4 Romantic Comedy / Tim Burton's DUMBO / Ghost Busters Sell Out
  • Pan and Jim's conversation while impersonating the Beatles.
  • The return of Gables.
  • Their claims that the Air Buddies contributed to the bombing of the World Trade Center on 9/11, also framing the basketball coach as he's sent to a jail/mental asylum.

22 - Futurama / KIDS NEXT DOOR Revival / PIXELS Movie
  • Scooby-Doo IS: The Dog With A Blog (Stan).

23 - SHREK / G:KND update / 5 DISNEY Live Action Remakes Announced
  • The Rebel Squad in a previous podcast saying they should do a Shrek podcast, and now they have.
  • Ken's first absence because of his computer not working due to water damage, which the remaining Rebel Squad thinking that he masturbated to Puella Magi Madoka Magica and jizzed on his computer causing the malfunction.

24 - TOY CARTOONS / Scooby Doo Meets KISS / 5 Nights@FREDDIES Film
  • "The Pancake Joke."

25 - MARVEL Phase 1 / New DBZ Series / NINTENDO Theme Park
  • The return of Paleo after all his sarcastic comments left on all the podcasts since the one he was in.
  • Pan requesting donations for his hospitalized female "Tsudere" friend to which he dubs the charity: "Get Well Tsundere."

Yogi Bear

Sym-Bionic Titan

Teen Titans Reviews
  • Pan looking back at his old reviews.
    Younger Pan: Hello, people of...
    Pan: Wow, that was awful.
    • Pan mentioning this joke about Tara Strong, when saying how much he liked Raven when the show was still on.
    Pan: An appropriate name, because I like to "Tara" that ass up!
    (Cut to the video salesman from Teen Titans: Trouble in Tokyo winking at Raven, who shudders)

Young Justice/Robotomy


Street Fighter Malibu Comic

Ninja Squad

Cartoon Network: Punch Time Explosion

Rugrats: The Search for Reptar

The Smurfs

Problem Solverz

GoldenEye: Rogue Agent

Dan Vs.

Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi
  • The start of the "In The Cards" review. Showing various horrified reactions to a parody of Sonic Underground's opening theme.
    Pan: ...That was a weird way to start a review.

The Looney Tunes Show

Phineas and Ferb

Rave Master

Almost Naked Animals

Star Fox Assault

Beavis And Butthead

Top 10 Disappointing Games

Secret Mountain Fort Awesome

My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic

Adventure Time Reviews

Cartoon Network: Punch Time Explosion XL

Red Steel

Level Up

Toonami Retrosepctive
  • At the end of part 1 of his Toonami retrospective. Just the casual way Pan says: ''Some people say Toonami was just a bunch of bumpers. I say those people are a bunch of cunts.

Legend Of Korra


Lollipop Chainsaw

Annoying Orange

Gravity Falls

Super Smash Bros. Melee
  • Pan getting an up-skirt shot of Peach (and Link).
Johnny Test

Jet Set Radio

The Powerpuff Girls

Megas XLR

Top 10 Worst Cartoon Network Moments

Bravest Warriors

Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt

RebelTaxi Hates 90s Kids

Incredible Crew/Nick Studio 10

Crazy Taxi/The Simpsons Road Rage
  • Pan commenting on all the alternatives to Crazy Taxi.
  • After Pan realizes how disturbing the game is without the sound-track, he asks for the "cheery" music to come back on.
    ""The Offspring:"" An angry man gets drunk and beats his kid/the same old way his drunken father did.
Teen Titans Go!

Top 6 Cartoon Network Pilots

Code Lyoko
  • Here's an.....interesting critical quote for you:
    Pan: "This show is darker then the neighborhoods I don't drive through."
Sanjay And Craig

Minority Report: The Game
  • A lot of the latter half of this review. ESPECIALLY the part where he mentions a lot of the cheat codes.
    • There is also this particular line from the aforementioned review:
    Pan: Anderson Cooper! Watched the movie Looper! Does not feature Bradley Cooper!

Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann

Xiaolin Showdown Chronicles

Uncle Grandpa

Top 10 Failed Animated Plots

Creepy Disturbing Cartoon Moments
  • The Unfortunate Implications of Nick or Treat.
    So next Halloween, go out to the scariest, darkest neighborhoods you can find, and you SHOW them you're a Nickelodeon '90s kid by shouting the phrase, "NI—" (cut to colorbar and long bleep)

Regular Show Mordecai and Rigby Trapped 8-Bit Land

Steven Universe

Top Ten Best Movies and Cartoons for Gamers

Rick and Morty

Top 10 Ugliest Cartoons

Space Dandy

Powerpuff Girls Danced Pantsed

Top 10 Creepy Disturbing Invader Zim Episodes

Wander over Yonder

Tony Hawk Pro Skater Retrospective

Ed, Edd n Eddy

Top 10 Lovable Jerks
  • While describing the Tsundere character, clips of Gaz from Invader Zim are shown. When the first one comes up, the caption reads "That show with Gir".
  • Also when describing the Tsundere, he has this to say:
    Pan: Cold and hard on the outside, warm and soft on the inside. And I want to get cold and hard on Raven's warm soft insides!
    Robin: Eat it! She's gonna eat it!
    Starfire: Mmm! Mmm! She's gonna EAT IT!
    Cyborg: Meat-meat-meat-meat-meat-meatball! Meat-meat-meat-meat-meat-meatball!


When Are You Too Old to be Watching Cartoons or Anime?:

Top 10 Worst Redesigns
  • Pan complains about the failed US Sailor Moon remake, where the titular character isn't attractive, before somebody (Nolan) tells him that she's only 14.
    • Then Zone-Tan shows up and tells him the age of consent in Japan is 14.
    Robin: Pack your things, we're heading for Tokyo.
  • Jake Long makes me want to stroke my Jake Shlong! *ding!*
  • His criticism of TOM's redesign:
    "That means MORE MONEY had to be put in to animate his facial expressions. Why would you do that? You're already teetering on cancellation as it i- aaaaaand it's cancelled." (beat) "But now it's back and for adults so it's all cool."
  • He describes Toonami shifting its demographic to "stupid babies who don't know how to use the internet".
  • When listing off the honorable mentions, he lists the time he had a nose and the time he drew Zone-Tan in his style... the latter of which happened mere seconds ago.
  • As he's about to close out the video, the cops show up.
    Pan: The cops found me! I didn't do anything wrong yet! I gotta get to Japan! Where I'll be free. Free to do what I want. Pan Pizza: Trouble In Tokyo! Only in theaters July 3rd! Rated PG.

Are Kids Today Stupid?
  • He talks about loving the soundtrack from Pokemon The First Movie as a kid and his older cousin hating it. Now...
    Yeah, that soundtrack was terrible, oh my god! Today you're all complaining about Justin Bieber and One Direction, in the 90's we had 98 Degrees and... Aaron Carter... (shudders)
    • Then he decides to listen to it again for the first time in years.
    (M 2 M starts playing)
    Pan: (retches) Yeah, it is terrible.
    • "So was I a stupid child for liking it, and are you stupid, too? No. You're stupid in general, but not for that."
  • Pan mentions his favorite messages he often gets:
    "You like [blank], I lost my respect for you." Basically, this comment means, "PEOPLE LIKE THINGS I DON'T LIKE!"

Top 10 Animated Bands

  • How does Pan open the video?
    Pan: HOLY FUCK.
  • When he tries to explain that the two main characters are ducks that look like frogs, he initially gets the two animals mixed up. And then...
    Buhdeuce: But I don't think I look anything like a frog-
    Pan: (Slightly slurred) Don't you fucking lie to yourself, you look exactly like a frog!
  • The show is about the two main ducks delivering bread to other ducks, and then Pan explains that you shouldn't feed ducks bread since they could choke, so the show is essentially supporting animal abuse.
    • And this inspires Pan to create a new show: "Tyler Perry presents: Madea Feeds the Dog Chocolate See What Fuck'N Happens".
  • In an attempt to make the show more "hip" for the target demographic, the main characters names are Buhdeuce and Sway Sway.
    Pan: Now, you ask, "which is which"? I don't care.
    • Continuing on that theme, he comes up with some catchphrases.
    Pan: 2 Hetero 4 the Metro, Otto Rocket asphyxiation, Neon Genesis Ellen DeGeneres.
  • How Pan closes the video:
    Pan: Breadwinners is terrible, I want Raven to choke me while I scream.

Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie

Top 10 Worst Cartoon / Anime Intro Theme Songs

Dragonball Evolution
  • Pan's reaction to the Kamehameha attack being referred as "air-bending"...
    Pan: from Avatar! This movie is like you got your mom to write the script! No, Mom, that is NOT a Pikachu, it is Agumon and he is from DIGIMON!!!!!
    • Heck, the entire review could be considered this, since he reviews the movie while drunk.
    Pan: If you're not in the know, this film is based on several Japanese cartoons and chronics: Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball G-... Dragon Ball Z...

Over the Garden Wall

Did You Know Animation: Regular Show

Did You Know Animation: The Incredibles
  • Pan mentions how he expected a sequel to the The Incredibles after seeing commercials for Rise of the Underminer
    That second Incredibles movie is coming out! (shows Cars poster) It's right around the corner! (shows Ratatouille poster) Right around the corner... (shows Wall E poster, then Up poster) Yeah... (shows Toy Story 3 poster, Pan is laughing a little) It's comin' out... (shows Cars 2 poster, Pan is practically in hysterics) It's gonna come out, guys! (shows Brave poster) It's coming out! (shows Monsters University poster) Just... You just wait! (starts crying) They're never gonna do it!

Game Boy Advance Video
  • Pan lists off the shows the GBA Video has:
  • Pan talks about how the original GBA models didn't come with backlights like the SP model or all current electronics, meaning that if a road trip goes into the night...
    Pan: I guess father wouldn't mind me turning on one of these car lights...
    (turns light on)
    Pan: Yes father! (turns it off)
  • And when he gets fed up with the Niko Worm Light:
    Pan: You know what, fuck it, I'm turning this light on.
    Pan's Dad: OH GOD I CAN'T SEE!
    (cut to a car crashing and someone falling out)
  • "Aw shit, son! It's Rugrats All Grown Up! It's the Dragon Ball Z of Rugrats!
  • Pan describes the low resolution as "tolerable... like, segregation... I GUESS it could be worse."
  • Pan mentions that the GBA Video website is still up.
  • Pan describes the brightness adjuster allowing you to give the film "a nice mayonnaise abortion aesthetic".
  • One of the pros of GBA Video is the inclusion of Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, "the best episode of SpongeMan"... at 240x160 resolution. Then it cuts to a tiny Game Boy in the center showing the episode at its actual resolution, compared to the video's 1920x1080.
  • Pan notes that two 30-minute episodes on cartridge comes for "the low price of 20 buttfucks". He then notes that almost the same price can buy an entire season of a show for your iPod.
    Pan: For 20 bucks I can buy the Season Four box set of Adventure Time, and give Marceline a kiss on the lips!
  • "Hey guys, you wanna watch Shrek? You wanna come over to my house, and frickin' watch a 90 minute movie of Shrek, ON MY GAME BOY ADVANCE? Cuz we'll do it!"
    • "You can count the frames per second, there's like... three."
  • The above becomes funnier when someone said that in the comments, that something very similar happened in real life.
    RadioactiveSkulls: I remember in grade 3 someone in my school had a game boy video Shrek cartridge and about 30 kids all huddled around the gameboy would watch it.

    On a tiny ass screen.

    30 kids.
    • Pan's response to the above is also funny.
      Pan-Pizza: Oh my god....

Top 10 WORST 2Edgy Hip EXTREME Cartoons

Jackie Chan Adventures

Top 10 animated GOTH girls (NSFW)
  • The opening:
    Pan: Hi. Do you want to date a dark girl, but are deeply afraid of minorities?
    • And from the description:
  • Pan attempts to distract himself from the horrible implications of Gothitelle being able to see when its trainer is going to die by drawing attention to its stubby little legs and calling it a hotdog.
  • This glorious bit of trolling:
    Pan: People say I don't talk enough about Ruby, and I'm like: "I love Ruby!" (beat) Ruby Gloom!
    Pan: Now, as I was saying about Ruby- oh hey, Panty and Stocking!
  • Pan adds an MLG "OOOOOHHH!" sound after Ruby tells Misery "bad things happen to [Misery] when it's not raining".
  • When Pan makes the mistake of saying that lolitas are great while talking about Stocking:
    Cop: Police! Get on the ground! Get on the ground! *Sirens whale in the background as footage from "Death race 2010" plays*
    Pan: Whoa whoa whoa, okay, wait. Lolis and Lolita complex, that's bad. Lolita fashion, that's something completely different. It's really cool, you should see it.
  • Pan shows a seemingly innocent clip from Teen Titans... that turns out to be from one of Zone's porn parodies.
    • This comment on Zone:
    Pan: Nobody knows who they are, but hopefully they're single...
    Pan: Shut up!
  • This rather accurate description of the conflict of Game Slave 2:
    Pan: There's a midnight sale for an overhyped video game, but Gaz didn't pre-order, for she is a filthy casual. And then this other fuck who probably shits into KFC buckets while surfing Reddit, claims to be the last guy who pre-ordered.
  • Before Pan can announce the number one spot, his little sister CISter barges in.
  • When Pan finally runs out of dirty jokes to make about Raven, he goes into a Heroic BSOD.
    Pan: Adios, my sweet ravioli.

Top 10 Lost Unfinished Cartoons & Anime

Scooby-Doo and the Cyber Chase
  • Pan calls Scooby-Doo the Call of Duty of animation.
  • After hearing that one of the scientists is named "Macklemore", Pan inserts some predictable music.
  • Pan notes how the gang has no trouble risking their lives to save a virtual pterodactyl, but leave a virtual princess tied up to presumably get eaten by a dragon.
  • "Incest, incest, it's the best! Put your sister to the test!"
  • When the Phantom Virus reveals his face, "Surprise, motherfucker!" is played over the scene.
    • The second time it happens, "WTF BOOM" is used instead.
  • "It's a Scooby Doo reunion! Remember classic monsters like the Creeper, and..." (montage of more obscure Scooby Doo villains)
  • Pan rages about the fact that it took the gang 32 years (at the time of release) to wise up to the Scooby-Doo Hoax trope, and how they chose the worst possible time to do so.
    Pan: But the one time, THE ONE. SINGLE TIME. In the entire series. Of Scooby Doo. As far as I know. They finally learn from past events, and think "Huh, all those other monsters were people in costumes. Maybe this time it'll also be a guy in a costume." As it turns out, they're not guys in costumes. They're legit, virtual monsters!
    • Pan then invokes the question of "Now What?" if they actually were guys in costumes.
    Pan: Aw man! I was gonna slice you open and sleep inside you, but you unmasked me. (sighs) Darn...
  • "Hey kids, if you're too skinny, or too overweight, and don't have this particular body type, Daphne HATES YOU."
  • Pan rages about the fact Shaggy only just now remembers the magnets the professor gave them, then rages about how a magnetic field was blocked by his pants, ranting that magnets don't work that way.
  • Pan wonders how the virtual gang is doing after finding out they're forced to spend eternity in the virtual world. Cut to the gang staring at the arcade flashing lightning while Running in the 90's plays.
    "Yeah, that's what I thought."
  • "Your ass is grass, Jimmy Olsen! And I've got the weed! (inhales, then starts coughing) Ooooohhhh, fuck!"
  • Pan is baffled by the fact that the villain tried to kill Scooby and the gang as part of the plan he formed after he was denied "some scientist prize project".
    Pan: What started out as vandalism, turned into attempted murder. Looks like this criminal's... a douchebag! I'm Sheriff John Bunnell, and Scooby Doo fuckin' sucks!

Did You Know Animation: Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Osmosis Jones

Top 10 Best Cartoon Perverts

Super Duper Sumos review
  • Calling Canada "Cananada."
  • The extremely drawn-out, and not entirely sincere, Shout-Out he gives to the person who mailed him the DVD.
    "Thhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhank you?"
  • Pan praising the show having a diverse ethnic cast so "everyone can feel ashamed."
  • Pan reading a article on "How to Be Booma from Super Duper Sumos on Club Penguin" and begins to burst out laughing at one of the warnings.
    "Do not call your butt "sexy". You will probably attract love, but might get banned."

J Stars Victory VS review
  • The beginning:
    Pan: "Man, oh man, I love shitting on the floor of my grandma's house!"
    Dad: "I love Japan, period."

  • After spending almost the entire video talking about how rare the mockumentary is, he reveals he was donated a bootleg of the film. Pan loads it up, shivering with anticipation, and it turns out to be a SpongeBob porn parody called SpongeKnob SquareNuts, which consists of a live-action SpongeKnob, Sandy, and Patrick having sex to Living in the Sunlight.
  • Earlier in the video, Pan mentions a Mean Girls Nintendo DS game, which has no screenshots, videos, or even a ROM to emulate. Not long after the video went up, searches for it increased.
  • "I wanted Justin Bieber but all I got was...Cheapy The Cheapskate!"

    Other Videos 
  • His interview with John Dilworth, thought mostly because the interviewee is one of the funniest animators alive:
    Dilworth: HELLO, EVERYBODY, THIS IS JOHN R. DILWORTH!! And the R stands for "Rumplestintskin!"
    Pan: So, how did you get into animation?
    Dilworth: With a pencil!
    Pan: How did you get into art in general?
    Dilworth: With finger paints, man!
    Pan: (starting to crack up): Just answer the question!
    • There's also Dilworth initially refusing to mention School Of Visual Arts by name because he doesn't want to give them notoriety without them paying him.