"Seigneur, je me vouerai tout entier à la noble quête dont Vous m'honorâtes. Mais avec l'équipe de romanos que je me promène, on n'est pas sorti des ronces."translation "Lord, I will devote myself entirely to the noble quest which You honored me with. But with the team of dumbasses I'm lugging, we're not out of the brambles yet."
— King Arthur
Kaamelott is a French series. It was created and written by Alexandre Astier and broadcast on French channel M6 since 2004. The show's four first seasons (called "livres", French for "books") were composed of short episodes (about 3 and a half minutes each.) Early seasons consisted of humorous depictions of daily life at King Arthur's court and of the knights' ineffective quest for the Holy Grail; but as the author grew more self-confident, it got spiced by more and more continuity (including Retcon at some point), half-serious story arcs. The fifth season then had longer episodes (7 minutes) and a Darker and Edgier tone.The sixth season aired in October 2009; it depicts Arthur's youth in Rome (partly filmed in the décors of the series of the same name, in Cinecittà.) Alexandre Astier also plans to make three movies.Kaamelott originally replaced another successful series, Caméra café but soon became even more popular.The series can be watched for free online.Has a character sheet.
All Men Are Perverts: Zig-Zagged: While Arthur certainly has no problem with keeping up to four official mistreses, he's the only one to seem interested in sex. Karadoc reluctantly agrees because kids need to be made somehow (but refuses to learn how to French- [well, Roman-] kiss), Lancelot is saving himself for Guenièvre (to the point that he doesn't know how to do the deed once with the woman he loves), and Perceval is completely innocent (or completely idiotic). Léodagan is apparently faithful, though Séli worries that with Arthur's philandering he might start acting differently.
Romans and Huns and Vikings and Saxons and Burgonds and Moors and Picts and Byzantines... all trying to invade Great Britain.
Venec knows an Egyptian architect who specializes in building pyramids.
The Knights of the Round Table are often displayed in full plate armor, used in the 15th century, while the story takes place in the 5th century.
And There Was Much Rejoicing: After Yvain accidentally causes people to believe Léodagan and Séli are dead (turns out there's a difference between "the Elephant of Cameliard" and "the Orphan of Cameliard"), Arthur gets a great deal of messages asking about their deaths, most of them quite joyous.
Angrish: The weaponmaster is once reduced to (the French version of) this during an argument with Grüdü.
Aren't You Going to Ravish Me?: Aelis, the first time she meets Arthur. He instead suggests she'd become a mistress... but she almost threatens to rape him.
Arthur: I'm warning you: if you touch me, I'll scream.
Armor-Piercing Question: Arthur, to the Lady of the Lake (see the Our Gods Are Greater entry below); also, in Livre VI, one that is never answered, about the arranged marriage between Arthur and Guenièvre. ("And if the chap doesn't manage to pull the sword out of the stone, is the marriage still happening?")
Arranged Marriage: Arthur and Guenièvre. Arthur makes it perfectly clear that he has married her for purely political reasons.
Almost literally in Livre II, episode "Le Terroriste":
Lancelot: And what are the grounds for your incarceration? Fearmac: Terrorism and insects possession. Lancelot: "Insects possession"? Fearmac: Yeah, at the time I had lice...
In Livre VI, during a war council, right after everyone acknowledges that Loth tried to betray them, he justifies himself with a philosophical speech. Léodagan slowly walks away, then comes back with a spiked hammer.
Léodagan: (calmly) I am willing to forgive you for your attempted coups, your crooked schemes, your bogus alliances and everything else... However, if you don't shut up right now, and for good, (points the hammer) I'll use this to flatten your balls.
Awful Wedded Life: A variation with Léodagan and Séli, in that they're just as horrible to each other as they are to others, and they often agree on certain subjects, like getting their children high positions in Arthur's court.
Badass Boast: Méléagant (essentially Chaos made human) has a nice one in the beginning of Livre V.
Méléagant: Me, when I have nothing to do here anymore, I retire... Not one drop of water, not one ray of sunshine. I dry up from head to toe into a small corpse under a heap of leaves... Seasons come and go and ignore me... And then, one day, the raven says it's heard in the distance someone who begins to cry again. "Guenièvre! Guenièvre!" So I open one eye, I crawl, eating snow, licking stagnant water... And my enemies shudder, for when they see me drink, they know I have come back.
Bear Trap: Séli once tries to stop Karadoc's nightly raids on the kitchen with some of these. It doesn't work. Karadoc even adds a few so that no-one would bother him while he's stuffing himself in his room.
Beat: Quite possibly the most used gag on the show, usually with Arthur unable to respond to whatever absymally stupid comment was just made except by staring and sighing.
As with the original Arthurian legends, this is how Arthur was conceived, Pendragon using Merlin's Polymorphic Potion to take the appearance of Gorlay since he lusted after his wife, Ygerne. Arthur is dubious about the story, however, since to his knowledge Merlin is hardly able to cook anything, least a Polymorphic Potion.
Lancelot is shown asking Merlin for one, but backs down when asked who he wants to be.
Don't get in-between Karadoc and food (or try to sell him bad food).
The weaponmaster is extremely touchy about his father's one-leggedness.
Gods help you if Bohort calls you a nonbeliever...
Letting Guenièvre realize there isn't marzipan anymore, after she ate it all, is NOT a good idea.
The things you won't survive if you do/say them in front of Father Blaise: peeing on the Chapel's wall, being Perceval telling a story, singing/whistling/playing something that is not a fourth, a fifth or a unison.
Karadoc. Just to put it in perspective, for those who don't know the show: in an episode, Arthur asks Karadoc how many meals he eats in a day. The answer? If you count daytime meals and night snacks, Karadoc has eleven meals a day. Eleven.
Although Karadoc is the obvious one, the other characters are no slouches. An ordinary three-hour lunch can involve two different meat dishes, poultry, cheeses... The weaponmaster, who keeps himself fit on dried fruits and water, pokes fun at their eating their own weight in meat three times a day or having the same diet as a bear and then being surprised that they don't feel up to the afternoon sword training.
When chieftains have meetings at Kaamelott, two boars per person is considered a plausible average (there might be some who only eat one, so they can pass it to those who eat three).
Elias of Kelliwic'h isn't shy about the truth either, especially toward Merlin.
Lancelot in an episode, toward Arthur.
No-one has any problem with calling people morons to their faces in-universe.
Bullying a Dragon: The Witch Hunter whom, because of his religious fanaticism and his hatred toward magic, throughout the show attacks and/or tries to coerce/intimidate both Arthur and Merlin. Granted, the first is the most tolerant and liberal king in the world, and the latter is a rather Inept Mage. Yet, bullying someone in charge of a country, invested of a holy mission by the gods, or a man with freaking magic powers is still a spectacularly bad idea.
Burn the Witch!: The Witch Hunter (le Répurgateur)'s shtick. To the point that everybody he accuses of witchcraft would end up at the stake if Arthur didn't put a stop to it. In a pilot episode, he tries this on Arthur himself, naturally resulting in the Witch Hunter ending at the stake himself. (Too bad Arthur didn't follow up with actually burning him.)
But for Me, It Was Tuesday: King Loth is so used to backstabbing his allies, when accused of betrayal in a prequel episode, rather than denying he readily admits that he probably did, since it looks very much like his style — even though he doesn't remember this particular instance.
Perceval is fond of totally unplayable games like "Contre-sirop" (Counter-syrup), "Raitournelle" (Raitornello), The Pélican (which involves filing a hundred artichokes from the smoothest to the most rough), and anything with lots of dice.
Early in the series, Karadoc teaches Perceval his very personal strategy to avoid looking like a idiot when he doesn't understand what he's told: answering a noncommital "That ain't wrong..." and letting his interlocutor assume he understood just fine. Given Perceval's utter stupidity, he uses it quite often... Expect it at least once in any conversation he has with anyone smarter than him (i.e. basically everyone).
It doesn't take much for Bohort to state, "Nous allons tous mourir !" ("We're all going to die!")
"C'est de la merde." ("This is shit."), can be heard from Karadoc several times, when he gets to taste some bad food.
Léodagan's favorite method of dealing with problems is pointing three catapults at it.
Cerebus Syndrome: When Lancelot left Arthur because of the blatant incompetence of the Round Table, the tone began to change, and at the end of the fourth season, everyone was warned that the fifth season would be Darker and Edgier. This trope is indeed called "Effet Kaamelott" in the French section of the Wiki.
Chekhov's Gun: In Livre VI, when Arthur discovers a dagger under his tutor's pillow, and then when, during the preparation of a party at Villa Aconia, the urban militia is not allowed to search her room. At first, it only shows the viewer that Aconia may be more than a tutor. It reappears later, when Arthur has to kill an Ostrogoth chief during the party to be promoted Dux Bellorum, while Glausia forbade weapons in the villa. That dagger was first seen in the first season's episode "La Coccinelle de Madenn" (Madenn's Ladybug).
The Chosen Zero: In one episode, the kingdom runs into a problem that only Merlin can solve. So Arthur says, "Wait a minute, are you telling me our last hope is Merlin?" Cue concerned looks between all characters and Bohort saying it: "We're all gonna die!"
Pellinore (Perceval's adoptive father) is another serious hardcase.
In fact, in this show, Cloudcuckoolander works a bit like Deadpan Snarker: there are characters who are always like this (Perceval, Karadoc, Kadoc, Hervé de Rinel too), and the rest of the cast who get into that territory on some occasions (yes, even Arthur, in an episode).
If we have to quote one — Arthur in "La Pâte d'Amandes" ("Marzipan"), answering Guenièvre's Berserk Button:
Guenièvre: (hysterical) But before that, my life was crap, you understand!!! Greeting the chief-of-this, the king-of-that; always polite, always pretty... Symbol of the Briton Nation... There must be some compensations to all those bullshits! Always got to care of something, especially you because you got "responsibilties", AND WHO TAKES CARE OF ME IN THAT TIME?? WELL YES, now that there's no marzipan anymore, I'm milling around, I AM ON EEEEEDGE!!! (sobbing)... I've got no friends, no hobbies... Since you don't touch me, I can sit on the facts of love, figuratively speaking, so I buried myself in marzipan... And when I look at you, and I see the way you treat me, I think I better go from here to Rome by foot to get some marzipan because it's actually the best thing that ever happened to me... Arthur: (thoughtful) I don't think that you're really the "Symbol of the Briton Nation"...
From another episode, where there are more knights than there are seats around the Table:
Arthur: (having explained this to Perceval) And from this, you deduce... Perceval: Uh... That not only we need to give him some space, but we also need to find him a chair.
"The Transport Arch" has one that looks vaguely magical (they hauled Merlin along to check, but being Merlin...). Instead of leading to the demonic planes as they feared, it leads to somewhere in northwestern North America.
Cool Helmet: Inverted and parodied — the knights avoid putting on their helmets as much as possible, because it make them look stupid (even more than usual, as Perceval is called upon to demonstrate in "Spangelhelm").
Cool Sword: Excalibur, a longsword that catches on fire when wielded by a person with an exceptional destiny.
The Corrupter: Méléagant. Who or what he is stays unclear, but it is hinted he's incredibly ancient. With a mix of guile and carefully-used magic powers, he works at corrupting Lancelot even further than he already was, and push a depressive King Arthur toward suicide.
Deadpan Snarker: Arthur; Léodagan; Loth; Séli; Galessin... To be honest, those five are just the most regular; almost every character of the series gets some snarky lines. Even Lancelot.
Death of the Old Gods: The Lady of the Lake is both a servant of the Celtic pantheon and of "the one god", implying the former is in fact welcoming the rise of Christianity. Merlin, on the other hand, is less than thrilled.
Dedication: The last episode of the series was dedicated to French actor Louis de Funès. Its final scene uses the music of one of his movies, Jo.
Even though Arthur is very ahead of his time, this trope is sometimes used to remind the viewers that no, despite the way they're talking, the protagonists are not modern people in fancy costumes, but really Fifth Century barbarians.
Loth: Kids, those days, they read, they read... end result: they're still virgin at ten.
One episode has Arthur discussing various upcoming executions. Léodagan thinks burning them alive is still good, Lancelot suggests drawing and quartering (it's more suspenseful, you don't know whether the arms or legs will come off first), as Arthurs floats the idea of abolishing the death penalty. Everyone, including Lancelot, looks at him like he's crazy.
Demoted to Extra: Morgane. She is normally the King's half-sister but is reduced to a Psychopomp in the series, who shows up only twice.
The Dung Ages: Arthur is one of the rare few in the series remotely concerned about personal hygiene. Some supporting characters have never taken a bath in their lives, and are in fact unacquainted with the very concept. "Saponides et détergents" has Arthur force Roparhz and Guethenoc to take a bath ("Why'd they put a watering trough inside?" "And upstairs too?") so they'll be presentable for a delegation to the Roman emperor. Roparhz reveals he's been wearing the same shirt for fifteen years (without removing it), and later we're told that after changing the bathwater three times it's still back with a layer of grease.
Ear Worm: In-universe example with "À la volette". Just like Arthur, now every fan remembers this traditional French song. Because it stays.
Elemental Embodiment: In Livre VI, some of the celestial "Ladies" we see debating over the fate of Arthur and Britannia are such; besides the Lady of the Lake, who's obviously linked to water, there is the Lady of Stones, the Lady of Wood and the Lady of Flames.
Excalibur in the Stone: Yes, in this version of the Arthurian myths, the sword Arthur pulled from the stone always was Excalibur. The exact details of this event are told in Livre VI, the prequel season. He can also put it back in the stone, letting anyone in the Realm to try pulling it out — and by their failure, remind the people that he's The Chosen One of the gods.
Eye Catch: The early seasons, having the shortest episodes, had two broadcasted side-by-side and separated by an eye catch (without commercial). Those were mostly short gags or scenes from the pilot episodes or Dies iræ. One was original, though: Arthur pulling Excalibur from the stone and stumbling into a pond as a result. This scene ends up being retconned by the final season, and thus non-canon.
Hervé de Rinel. At first, he was the less talkative Knight of the Round Table. Then, in Livre III, he became quite an idiot. Then, in Livre IV and V, he became so idiotic that even the chief of the Medieval Morons came to see Arthur and tell him that "Life is too hard for someone like him..."
In-Universe with the swordmaster. Since he eats very little meat, a lot of vegetables and water (see Big Eater), other characters have started going on about how he lives on seeds. He doesn't take kindly to that accusation.
Between Arthur, Karadoc and Perceval with cottage cheese.
One of Perceval and Karadoc's "training methods" involves fighting with salami nunchucks, another the theoretical aspect of fighting with fennel◊ (turns out you don't grab it by the stalk and bludgeon people with it, you grab the round part and stab with the stalk).
Genre Savvy: Father Blaise, and, to some extend, Arthur and the other knights.
Father Blaise: (after being asked why he notes everything) To fit you into the legend! May I point out to you that between your dead horses and your ill horses, I have a legend to write!
Girlfriend in Canada: Played with. Bohort's wife is summoned to Kaamelott, but Bohort maintains that she arrived very late at night, after everyone went to bed, and has retired to her chambers with seasickness — which is why nobody may see her. Turns out he's telling the truth.
Calogrenant, the king of Caledonia (Scotland), shows up with his butt wrapped in a quilted bedcover because his armor has rusted from a fall in a puddle. However the rules of the Round Table specify that every knight must show up properly dressed OR dressed in his country's traditional garb. Thus, the improper but convenient improvised quilted bedcover skirt retroactively becomes the official costume of Caledonia.
How We Got Here: Two in one for Livre VI. Eight episodes out of nine are about how Arthur became king of Britain and recruited his knights, and the first begins In Medias Res with a fight at Villa Aconia and gradually explains what led to it.
Don't call either Arthur and Anna "brother" or "sister" without specifying "half-" before.
Invisibility Cloak: Played with. Merlin is unable to turn people invisible, but got around it by designing invisibility panes, which makes anyone hiding behind them invisible. Just make sure you remember where you put them.
Involuntary Shapeshifter: Merlin, as a druid, can turn into various animals. However, he doesn't control it much and follows whatever animal spirit governs the week.
Ironic Echo: At the beginning of the first episode of Livre VI, the Roman aide-de-camp tells his troops, "Hey, guys, guess what we're eating tonight? Hare." At the end, when Léodagan is made chieftain, he roars, "Hey, guys, guess what we're eating tonight? ROMANS!"
The episode "L'Interprète" has the following discussion:
Father Blaise: Oh, I wanted to ask you: How did you get into the burgundian culture? Interpreter: (surprised) Burgundian culture? I didn't even know there was one. No, I wanted to study Modern Greek, but it was full; the only languages left were Burgundian or English. English! But that's even less widespread.
In another episode, when Merlin tries out "modern medecine" instead of magical healing, Arthur tells him it will never catch on. Though that's understandable, considering the best Merlin could come up with was throwing salt in an open wound....
I Want Grandkids: Séli (and Léodagan, to a much lesser degree). Here, it's for a self-serving reason: If their daughter produces the heir to Britain, the family's position is guaranteed. Unfortunately, the biggest obstacle is that neither Arthur nor Guenièvre has any interest in the other, yet Séli keeps buying fertility potions.
Kavorka Man: Arthur. He has a wife, seven mistresses, and several other affairs along the series. Yet he is a never-smiling, impatient, rude, average-looking jerk. His success is often attributed to his status, but he even had affairs before being the king. However, he does treat ladies with respect, and the fact that he is the Only Sane Man in the show helps a lot.
Lawful Stupid: Grüdü (yes, the Viking barbarian reared by polar bears) can follow orders to the exclusion of common sense. For example, when he and the swordsmaster are guarding the front gate, no-one is guarding the back gate. If he goes to guard it, that's dereliction of duty. If the swordsmaster goes, he's a deserter. While they argue semantics, the assassins slip in unimpeded.
Séli: Well, I cooked something that's not too shabby: some kind of tart, with onions, cabbage, celery and spices. (they taste it) Séli: So? Bohort: (embarassed) It's... interesting... Arthur: The more interesting part being: how do you manage to cook something that foul with normal ingredients. Séli: (shocked) Foul??? Bohort: Well, you can say it's... um, a peculiar taste... Arthur: It's incredible, it's like eating dirt, and cow dung, and gravel, it smells like a henhouse, but it really is celery and onions. It's amazing.
Arthur gets out of having to duel Karadoc (for having stolen his wife) by invoking an obscure tradition of "spouses exchange" from Vannes (where Karadoc comes from). Karadoc, who wasn't eager for the duel either, is thrilled by this.
Séli and the Jurisconsult in Livre V; the latter tries to extort privileges (namely "bed and meals" at the expense of Kaamelott) from the former by pointing out that as a "magistrate", he is supposed to be legally considered a "distinguished guest". Séli's reaction? Ordering a full plate of stale crusts of bread for him ("We're supposed to give you "bed & meals", nowhere it is said that it should be good meals.") and removing the pillows and blankets of his bed ("You got the bed, right? Then pillows and blankets aren't mandatory.").
Lovable Coward: Everybody except Arthur, Lancelot, and Léodagan. Bohort stands out as the most acute case.
Perceval and Karadoc's dialogues are hilarious when they try to use big words.
Karadoc: (to Arthur, through the door of his bedroom) We are wily-nilly used by you to achieve on an end! Arthur: What??? Karadoc: We are willy-nilly used by you to achieve on an end! (beat) Arthur: (opening the door, thoughtful) You are unwillingly used by me to achieve my ends? Karadoc: Oh yeah, that's better... Perceval: The turn of phrase is more gradual... Arthur: ... Clearer? Perceval: Clearer, yeah. Arthur: (half-proud, half-amused) Did you notice that I understand you better and better? Perceval: Yes, that's what I was just thinking about right now. Karadoc: Quicker and quicker, at least. Perceval: It's more spindly! Arthur: ... More fluent? Perceval: Right.
The Burgund king has no idea of what he's saying, including such gems as "the flower in the bouquet withers... and is never reborn!", "I appreciate fruits in syrup", "Not change plate for the cheese!" and "strong in apples". He also starts sniggering at "biography".
Medieval Morons: From the peasants to the knights. It's even the reason Lancelot left the Table.
Midnight Snack: Karadoc often sneaks to the kitchen in the middle of the night, as do other characters. In one episode, Séli tries putting traps to prevent this, as there's a big feast coming up. Too bad Karadoc already took the food to his room, and mined the way there with more bear traps...
Ninja Zombie Pirate Robot: After the pope commands Arthur to build a cathedral, they turn to Venec, who has an Egyptian architect whose previous work was in pyramids, a sweet deal for a large amount of pine, and leftover statues from a whorehouse. Sadly, Britain will not see the first pyramid-shaped pine cathedral/brothel, as they're out of funds.
The Knights of the Round Table on an average day. Arthur once manages to turn a heated discussion on Léodagan refusing to pave the roads in his kingdom by making a Rousing Speech that leads to a Misfit Mobilization Moment as the Knights of the Round Table, finally united in their Quest for the Holy Grail, set off... only for one to point out that they can't really get anything done near Léodagan's kingdom, seeing as the roads aren't paved... Arthur just slumps back down in his seat as the exact same argument starts again.
The assembly of the Kings of Logres, once every 4 years, is even worse.
Hoël: (slamming the table) You're the worst bunch of slackers of the whole Celtic World! Loth: I won't ever come back, let it be said, I'll do it, I'll stay home, shit, I've had enough... Léodagan: (pointing toward Arthur) We already have one governing like a woman, we aren't going to start a collection, right? Arthur: I'll give you 15 days of hard labor, you'll see if it feels womanly!
In Livre VI, the council of the "Ladies", even though they are divine beings, is shown to be just as bad as the mortals.
Not That Kind of Mage: Merlin often claims that the reason he's an Inept Mage is that he's a druid- stuff like having a roof over his head (for his laboratory) cuts his powers by half. However, it's also seen that he's not that great a druid either (he can't read druidic, for starters).
Obnoxious In-Laws: Arguments between Arthur and his family-in-law are common. Unusually, Léodagan often sides with Arthur against his wife.
Only the Chosen May Wield: Excalibur only lights up when held by someone with an exceptional destiny, and will always comes back to The Chosen One. Unless stuck in the stone, in which case only the rightful King of Britain can pull it out.
Our Gods Are Greater: Played with. The series is creatively ambiguous about which gods, if any, exist. Arthur has formally converted to Christianity for the sake of convenience but isn't much of a believer (in fact, he prays to Mars at one point), and retains an overtly pagan druid on his payroll. It's even lampshaded by Arthur when the Lady of the Lake tries to make Arthur feel guilty for praying to Mars.
Arthur: Praying to Mars?? (laughs) Praying to Mars... (beat) Arthur: ... Yeah, Maybe. So What? Lady of the Lake: Are you kidding me?? You're praying to a Roman god! May I remind you, for your information, that you're quite commited to a quest in the name of the One God... Arthur:Because the One God is Celtic? Lady of the Lake: (bewildered) Huh... Hmm... Well, he's the One. Arthur: Yeah, right. And you, with your orange hair and your skin as white as a dairyman's crap, you're not Celtic? Lady of the Lake: Yes, at first... Arthur: (sharply) "At first"? What, you're working half-time with the ones, half-time with the others? Religion is a mess. Admit it and let me pray to whoever I want. Doesn't prevent me from searching for your damn Grail, anyway.
Parrot Exposition: The Burgond king, once he "learns" to speak Briton, does this a lot. Arthur once manages to broker a peace treaty between Kaamelott, the Burgonds and their Viking allies by telling the Viking the Burgond agreed to give him his lands.
Arthur: So what's the water look like? Gethenoc: Still black, and there's a layer of grease floating.
Amongst the knights, Karadoc stands out. Mevanwi once threatens to break up with him if he doesn't start taking baths. Once he figures out that he can eat while in the water, he agrees that he can maybe take one or two baths a year.
"The Reason You Suck" Speech: There are a few during the series, but the scene of the Round Table in "The Return of the King" (in Livre V) is often considered a raging, liberating, howling-at-the-moon Moment Of Awesome by the fans, considering whom it is given to. Context: by some improbable twists of fate, Karadoc (who, in Livre V, is thatkindofcharacter), has been crowned king by his wife Mevanwi. Then, when Arthur came back from a quest, during the Round Table meeting, he and Perceval invite Arthur, and give a "The Reason You Suck" Speech to every knight in attendance, and to Arthur in particular (they don't know the purpose of Arthur's quest, i.e. find out if he's got children somewhere). Speech to which Arthur replies with one of his own, delivered in one of the calmest voice ever, with a bittersweet music in the background.
Karadoc: Sir Arthur is back from a quest; maybe he can say something about it? Arthur: No. Perceval: Come on, at least tell us if it was successful, don't be shy. Arthur: (sighs) ... No, it wasn't. Karadoc: Okay... No Comment... Perceval: (sarcastic) I can see that there have been some major achievements, this week, again. What did you heroes do, apart from scratching your own feet? Léodagan: You know what "we heroes" have to say to that? Perceval: Yeah, right... When it comes to being unpleasant, you're proficient. [...] Karadoc: No, it's okay, do nothing. Finding the Grail will be a piece of cake... Perceval: It's not that difficult to put some effort in it... Karadoc: (getting angry) Sir Arthur, apparently you travelled across the whole country by foot; don't you think you could have taken a look? No no, me myself an me, always, always, always!!! Perceval: (disappointed) You really didn't bring anything back? Not even a small clue? (Arthur shakes his head) Karadoc: (sarcastic) Well done, then. Everyone else? Any news? [...] Perceval: (thumps the table) I can't believe it! You think you can fool us?! Karadoc: I'm warning you... Arthur: (interrupts) I did build a stronghold, at least. Perceval: ... What? Arthur: (very calmly, with a put out look) For the Grail. I did build a stronghold. Kaamelott, they call it. I sought and hired knights in the whole kingdom; in Caledonia, in Carmelid, in Gaunes, in Vannes, in Wales; I ordered a big table, to have the knights sitting together; I ordered it round, to prevent having a knight sitting in a corner, or at the end of it; it was complicated, so I tried to explain what was the Grail, to make sure everyone understand; it was hard, so I tried to laugh, to make sure nobody got bored; I failed; (stares at Karadoc and Perceval) but I don't want anyone to say that I did nothing. Because it's not true. (silence) Perceval: (embarrassed) Come on Sire, you know you must not take what we say seriously; you know that we are fools... Arthur: (nods, depressed) Stop calling me Sire.
In one of the pilot episodes, "Les Funérailles d'Ulfin", Arthur is attending the funeral of an elderly noble... only to have the "dead guy" waking up (just as the pyre is being lighted) and asking what's going on. When he makes an unfortunate comment, Arthur does his best to put him back in the grave.
In Livre I, "La Mort le Roy Artu", Father Blaise endeavors to have tourists visiting Kaamelott to bring some money to the coffers. The visit of the castle ends up with... the tomb of King Arthur. Because it's solemn. Arthur is rather bothered by this; Blaise thus changes it to... visiting the tomb of Queen Guenièvre.
Lancelot: Perceval, what are you doing here? Perceval: I'm taking the tour. Arthur:What tour? You live here, you complete moron! Perceval: Yeah, but they take you places I've never seen! Apparently we can visit your tomb, that's got to be worth looking at.
Episode "Always" of Livre II is all about the characters reacting (and getting all philosophical) over the report of Perceval's death. Turns out he just has been very sick, and shows up at the end.
Léodagan and Séli are once believed to be dead by their kingdom of Carmélide, And There Was Much Rejoicing. When Léodagan learns that it was caused by Yvain's latest poor choice of a moniker (he was going for "the Elephant of Cameliard", but got it mixed up with "Orphan"), his father is not amused.
Father Blaise is not happy with the introduction of the tritone (a.k.a. diabolus in musica) in religious music.
Father Blaise: The next person I catch whistling a pagan interval, I'M REPORTING HIM TO THE POPE!!!
Also, Venec once screws up and is left with an unsaleable shipment of unaged goat cheese. Karadoc asks to look at it, since he might have a use for it... and goes ballistic. When Venec asks how much Karadoc will give for it, he just stares, and Perceval has to tell Venec that he has to leave now.
The main character, Arthur, cheats so many times on his wife with numerous mistresses or one-night stands that he would be considered a lecher nowadays. Everytime his relationships are evoked, it becomes a source of comical relief or even humiliation for him or his wife. Oh, and of course, the only woman he doesn't touch at all is his wife.
When it comes to the rest of the knights, five of them are seen with a wife throughout the show: Léodagan, who seems to be quite faithful (emphasis on the quite); Bohort, who live away from his wife and took a vow of chastity; Karadoc, who considers sex to be "something necessary to make children, and that's it"; Lancelot (once he eloped with Guenièvre), who doesn't even know how to make love theoretically; and King Loth, who never mentions his wife without the word "bitch", or other synonyms.
And, last but not least, the only time in the show that a sexual intercourse is not shown in a funny way (Arthur and Mevanwi) is the point where the show gets Darker and Edgier.
Sexless Marriage: Arthur & Guenièvre; Bohort & Berlewen to a point (he claims to have children)
In Livre IV, there's an episode with a dialogue between Arthur and Lancelot copied on the one in Heat.
Venec, slave trader (among other activities), explains in an episode that he's got an Egyptian architect, and that he had to give three gladiators to get him at Glastonbury fair. Glastonbury is a town which is heavily related to the Arthurian Myths (it is supposed to be a possible location of the Isle of Avalon, and King Arthur's grave can be found in the Glastonbury Abbey).
Two for Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: The equivalent of the inquisitor is called the Witch Hunter ("Le Répurgateur"). And one episode even mentions a dungeon full of Skavens.
One example is the In Name Only druid Merlin. He was supposed to set off a fireball, (which he couldn't if his life depended on it) and, well, failed to do so.
Reversed (or maybe inverted) in an episode featuring Merlin's long-time rival Elias of Kelliwic'h. As Elias threatens Merlin and King Arthur, his magical staff begins to glow eerily, prompting everyone in the room to take cover. Elias is initially puzzled by their reaction, then explains that, "Oh no, no, it always does this. It's just for show."
Merlin once tried to cast a confusion spell during a battle, but he needed a shark tooth, which Perceval and Karadoc had been sent to get. Four hours later at the tavern, they get it into their heads that the tooth itself is cursed and throw it in the fire. Merlin casts the spell with a ferret's tooth instead, and the resulting missile is so pathetic the enemy army trips over itself with laughter, allowing Kaamelott to attack and claim victory.
Torture Technician: While Arthur doesn't employ one, Venec tries to sell him a variety of progessively more hideous mechanical torture devices, as every ruler needs them (Léodagan heartily agrees). Arthur, who is against torture, declines... but The Stinger shows him using one to freak out Guenièvre.
Tranquil Fury: Léodagan is a mean, quick-tempered bastard at his best. When he starts speaking in a calm, matter-of-fact voice, it's a cue that you should start running.
Merlin: Elias de Kelliwi'ch; Great Enchanter of the North, Caller of the Caledonian Wolves, Slayer of the Snow Dragon, Creator of the Potion of Omnipotence, Seer of... Arthur: (interrupts) Enough! You don't need to spout off his entire resume, do you? Merlin: It's a wizard thing; it's how we greet each other... Elias: Merlin; Enchanter of Britain, Defeater of the Winchester Weasel, Creator of the Potion of Ingrown Nails Cure, Author of the scroll Druidism for Old Folks... Merlin: (interrupts) Yeah, alright, alright. (to Arthur) You were right, it's gonna take forever.
Twin Threesome Fantasy: Played straight with Azilis and Tumet (but averted when Arthur can't stand to be kissed by Guenièvre and Démetra at once).
Useless Useful Spell: Merlin manages to create the Moonstone, which turns goat's meat into water. He later comes up with a stone that turns lead into water. Fresh water, so there's that.
Arthur: What's with you and water? We're not in Sahel...
Vetinari Job Security: When Arthur steps down from the throne of Britain, the knights find out handling the kingdom is more work that they can handle.
Waking Non Sequitur: At the end of episode "L'Ivresse" ("Drunkenness"), Perceval, after passing out drunk on a tavern table, suddenly raises his head and shouts "Independent Wales!" at the top of his lungs.
Arthur isn't fond of snakes, although he denies it.
Yvain is very scared of wasps and bees.
You All Meet in an Inn: Karadoc and Perceval recruit their whole new clan in an inn, which becomes their "headquarters". Not surprising, since they're working there to pay over their huge debt to the innkeeper.
Adaptation Expansion: Several plots are expanded on from TV episodes (the Giant Snake from Shadow Lake, the Transport Seats...).
Crown of Horns: The Necromancer in the first album has a skull with immense deer horns (probably from a Megaloceros) as helmet. In the end, Perceval seizes it and wears it at the Round Table.
Exotic Weapon Supremacy: Averted; the Viking chieftain chooses a scythe over a pair of kutars to assassinate Arthur, but doesn't get to use it.
Failed a Spot Check: Karadoc and Perceval are rather oblivious as a general rule, but in Le Serpent Géant du lac de l'Ombre ("The Giant Snake from Shadow Lake"), they take it to a whole new level. While rowing on the title lake in search of the eponymous giant snake, a huge coil of said monster rises above the water behind them... and they don't notice. Then its tail strikes their boat, and they wonder if they hit a rock. Finally, a stronger tail lash capsizes their boat and sends both in the water. Their conclusion? There's no giant snake in this damn lake, they're just wasting their time.
Give Chase with Angry Natives: In L'Armée du Nécromant, Arthur and co. are climbing to the top of a mountain to defeat an evil Necromancer. Along the way, they come across a gigantic Rodent of Unusual Size, fortunately asleep. When things go wrong at the summit, they slide back down on improvised sleds, hurling stones at the rat as they pass. When the pursuing Necromancer arrives, the rat is awake and angry, and proceeds to eat him.
Hair-Trigger Avalanche: In L'Armée du Nécromant, the knights are caught in an avalanche while fighting a horde of zombies in the mountains. At first they think it was from Merlin casting a spell, but in fact it was because Karadoc and Perceval were yelling while charging into the fray.
Mouth Cam: We get such a shot in the first album, when Karadoc and Perceval are pursued by a big, undead skeleton sabertooth tiger.
Series Continuity Error: Séli is (in one episode) mentioned to be a Pict. Yet when an army of Picts show up and kidnap Guenièvre in the seventh album, she has no idea who they are.
Sinister Scythe: The Viking chieftain in the second album decides to wield one against Arthur.
Stock Ness Monster: The Giant Snake from Shadow Lake. Alluded in one episode (where Perceval and Karadoc triumph over an eel), and seen in the fifth album.
Turn Undead: Featured in L'Armée du Nécromant. The knights going on a mission to investigate a surge of zombies, they bring Father Blaise with them, on the principle that priests are supposed to have powers against The Undead. However, Blaise never tried this before, and all his attempts fail. Except at a critical moment toward the end, after hours of prayer, where he obliterates a group of giant zombies, almost accidentally (and fries his holy symbol in the process).
Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Here, "Why Did It Have to Be Rats with Pigeon Wings?", in the sixth album. Guenièvre is already afraid of birds, but those things are much worse.
Bon, euh c'est bon, super, cassez-vous! C'est pas faux.