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Awful Wedded Life

"Take my wife. Please!"
Henny Youngman

A species of Dom Com based on the premise that monogamous marriage is rather like a long, slow, exquisite torture by a sadistic god from whose maleficent clutches escape is impossible. Husbands are child-like buffoons who watch too much football, leave the toilet seat up, ogle hot women, and forget anniversaries. Wives are frigid, nagging, hateful shrews with zero interest in sex. Children destroy your home and what little peace of mind you have left, while waiting their turn to perpetuate the cycle. Obnoxious In-Laws serve to add to the misery. The audience may be left wondering, "Why don't they just get a divorce, if they're so miserable?"

Married... with Children was probably the first time this trope was seen on American television, but it's been a mainstay of British shows since The Fifties.

The name, for those who don't get it, is a reference to the line of the traditional wedding vows, "Lawful wedded wife".

Similar to No Accounting for Taste, but you'll rarely (if ever) see the Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other moments occasionally found in that trope. In the West, it's becoming a Discredited Trope due to the de-stigmatization of divorce, and the liberalization of divorce laws. Still used by many a comedian, to the point of being an Undead Horse Trope.

Contrast Happily Married for the opposite and Happy Marriage Charade for when this trope pretends to be Happily Married.


Examples

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    Anime & Manga 

    Comedy 
  • Too often a source of jokes in stand-up comedy.
    • Rodney Dangerfield was particularly big on this joke.
    • Today, Jo Brand does the same thing from a woman's perspective—although she freely admits that jokes aside, her marriage is actually pretty good.
  • A little boy runs into his parent's room crying that there's a monster under his bed. His father gives him these words of wisdom: "Enjoy it while you can, my son. When you grow up, the monster'll be in your bed!"
  • "Daddy, why does the bride wear white on her wedding?" "Because it's the happiest day of her life." "Oh... So why does the groom wear black?"

    Comic Strips 
  • The Lockhorns, though thankfully the eponymous couple apparently doesn't have kids.
  • For Better or for Worse since going into reprints/new-runs seems to spend a lot of time dwelling on how John is an insensitive dolt and the children have nothing better to do than make Elly's life harder. Perversely, the strip also implies that anyone who doesn't settle down and live the same kind of life is irresponsible, childish and a bad person.
  • Andy Capp seems like this much of the time, although Andy and Flo definitely have their Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other moments. (No kids here either.)
  • Stanley and Harriet Parker of The Better Half started out like this, but a change of cartoonists in the '80s brought a much more lighthearted tone to their relationship (as well as a rather dramatic Art Evolution).
  • Tom the Dancing Bug parodies this with "Marital Mirth", which is stylistically modeled after "The Lockhorns". Unlike other examples the thin veneer of jocularity is removed, with every strip featuring the two talking about how much they openly hate each-other.

    Films — Live-Action 
  • In The Hangover, Phil, who misses life before marriage and kids, tells Doug that once he gets married, he's going to start dying a little inside every day. He also discourages Stu from marrying his Control Freak girlfriend.
  • In Old School, Vince Vaughn's character, who is the best man at a wedding, reminds his friend that "you only gets one vagina for the rest of your life" just as he's about to get hitched.
  • Rick from Bachelor Party gets this several times throughout the movie; his Henpecked Husband older brother tells him that before long, the novelty of marriage wears off and it becomes a chore, and his friend Brad, who just went through a heart-wrenching divorce, tells him that "as soon as you get married, everything changes."
  • The whole point of the movie Tomcats.
  • Wayne's World: "Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries."

    Literature 
  • Being forced to marry the foolish, irresponsible Lydia is essentially Wickham's punishment in Pride and Prejudice. It is also implied that, although she loves him now, marriage to Wickham will one day be this to Lydia as well. Many other couples in Jane Austen's works exemplify this as well, sometimes softened with moments of Aww, Look! They Really Do Love Each Other. Justified in that divorce was not really an option in Regency England

    Live-Action TV 
  • Mad About You became this in the later years.
  • Curb Your Enthusiasm
  • The husband is the frigid one, but Married... with Children otherwise fits. They do nothing but snark at each other, one of their children is a Dumb Blonde and the son is not much better.
  • Home Improvement occasionally slipped into this.
  • As did Family Matters.
  • And Everybody Loves Raymond, which increased over the years, though Ray and Debra weren't nearly as bad as Ray's parents.
  • Same with Reba, although they spent more time dancing around it.
    • Reba holds bitter feelings toward Brock and "other woman" Barbara Jean for the collapse of their marriage, despite constantly putting down Brock for other things and generally saying how the last few years of their marriage were miserable anyway before Barbara Jean entered the picture.
    • Similarly, the last couple of seasons showed Brock and Barbara Jean entering this, constantly bickering and fighting, separating at one point, and teetering on the brink of divorce several times.
    • Finally, back in the first season, Brock meets Barbara Jean's father, who acts morally superior to Brock since he has been married for over 50 years and would never divorce his wife... "mostly because she's too ugly to kiss goodbye." Reba showed that, while this is becoming a Dead Horse Trope in a lot of ways, in some conservative and religious communities (the show took place in Texas), a bad marriage is still preferable to a divorce, especially amongst the older generations.
  • Til Death is somewhat of a deconstruction in that the better you know Joy, the slobbier she seems, and the better a match for Eddie.
  • My Family
  • Keeping Up Appearances. Poor Richard deserves a sainthood for putting up with Hyacinth for all those years.
  • About any time a married couple is seen in The Benny Hill Show, it falls square into this (the very rare exceptions being Insatiable Newlyweds).
  • Fawlty Towers shows marriage as being a constant battle between Basil and Sybil.
  • Friends: Rachel's parents before they got divorced and Joey's parents. Also Chandler's mom and dad when he was growing up, though they're seperated at the time of the show.
  • Frances and Terry's marriage in The Librarians.
  • Joe and Phyllis Britt in The Twilight Zone episode "What's in the Box?".
  • Stanley and Helen Roper, on Three's Company and The Ropers (and their UK counterparts in Man About The House and George and Mildred).
  • Frasier: Niles and Maris, off-screen, though they eventually got divorced. He had a habit of choosing women who treated him badly.
  • A married couple were recurring characters (Joseph and Mary) in Father Ted where the gag was they loathed each other; with the husband verbally abusing the wife and the wife constantly beating the husband until Ted appears. At which point they they would switch and become lovey-dovey towards each other. The joke works because the island is predominantly Catholic, were divorce is still highly frowned upon.
  • Revenge has Victoria and Conrad. Not funny at all.

    Radio 
  • The Bickersons - who, with 1949 origins, may be the Ur Example, at least for the Sitcom.
  • On Cabin Pressure, Mr. and Mrs. Birling openly hate each other, which is part of the reason Mr. Birling pays the protagonists to fly him far away from her.

    Western Animation 


    SitcomBlack Sitcom
Dom ComShow GenresDorama
Auto-TuneUndead Horse TropeBe Yourself
Blue Collar ComedyRecorded and Stand-Up ComedyBorscht Belt
Bureaucratically Arranged MarriageMarriage TropesBattle Couple
Ascended To CarnivorismImageSource/OtherBecause I Said So
Awesome Moment of CrowningJust for PunAx-Crazy
At Least I Admit ItCynicism TropesThe Bad Guy Wins

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