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  • Take This Job and Shove It: A lot of stories that deal with a Bad Boss will often end this way, with the submitter quitting because they have had enough of their boss's bullshit.
  • Tampon Run: This story has the submitter getting tampons for his wife, but the cashier (initially) refuses to sell them to him because he is male and refuses to listen to his explanations that they're for his wife.
  • Teasing from Behind the Language Barrier: This submitter's uncle uses this to take care of a persistent caller that kept bothering his nephew:
  • That Came Out Wrong:
  • That's What She Said: Attempted by a female worker here: "God, that took forever! It felt so good to finally shove some meat in there!"
    • This one comes from a blood clinic worker, with the customer saying that he would've gone for it had the worker not done so.
  • They Just Don't Get It:
    • Stories under the "Ignoring/Inattentive" (formerly "Not Listening") tag tend to be cases of this.
    • Taken to the extreme here. The caller tries to get her problem reassigned to another IT Manager, because the current one is on vacation. The help desk person repeatedly says that the away manager is already assigned to the case, and not once seems to understand what the caller is actually saying.
    • And here too. Apparently for these workers (and these workers as well), "I don't want to buy the wine" means "I don't want to show you my ID, give me the wine".
      • This worker goes even further, construing the laws for "You can't sell alcohol to minors" and "You can't sell alcohol to an adult buying on behalf of minors" to mean "You can't sell alcohol to an adult who happens to be accompanied by minors, even if the alcohol is clearly for the adult".
    • In response to a customer who has a malfunctioning debit card (on a Sunday, while on vacation), the bank employee not a few times says "just don't spend money", not seeming to get that this isn't an option, especially for that customer at that time.
    • This boss really doesn't seem to understand that when an employee quits, that's it; they don't work there anymore.
    • From this story: " I have explained, I am unable to pay any more at present." "I understand, but why are you not paying a greater amount?"
    • Here is a tobacco example similar to the liquor examples above.
    • Part 2: an idiot/Jerkass cashier who needs to have their manager called in for basic math skills.
    • This employee really wants to work (read: get paid for) Mondays even though the store in question is not open on Monday.
    • This company had to deal with a bill collector that continued asking for someone who never had anything to do with them despite filing multiple complaints with the FCC. Even after the boss gave them permission to mess with the caller, they still had to prank the collector no less than six times before they finally gave up.
    • Apparently "I don't have a bag" is too complicated a concept for this girl to understand.
    • This teller keeps telling a customer they have to remove their sunglasses, not understanding when the customer repeatedly tells them that they're not actually sunglasses.
    • This clerk insists on giving a customer five dollars back for a one-dollar DVD return and taking one dollar for a five-dollar DVD purchase. The customer just accepts it (and gives the extra change to charity) after the clerk fails to understand the problem after it is pointed out to her two times.
    • This security guard decides that a family helping their young daughter put on a jacket means that they stole it. It doesn't matter that it's stained, has no tags, and is a brand the store does not sell. When the guard finally gets that it was not stolen, several hours later, he asks a coworker "why didn't you tell me?", when said coworker did, numerous times.
    • This demonstrator seems to believe that a family claiming they don't have carpeting on their floor means they don't have a floor at all.
    • "I suppose if they misheard 'ice water' as 'affogato,' mishearing "I'm allergic" as "I'd like extra" isn’t too far of a stretch, but still..."
    • The conversation in this story was apparently a daily occurrence for the submitter.
    • This clerk at a jewelry counter can't seem to understand how a wind-up watch works without a battery. Despite having it explained to them by multiple people.
    • This receptionist just doesn't get that the customer in question has not been getting bills for eight months because a.) they moved from Connecticut to California, and b.) their old address was wrong in the system, so the bills were not forwarded, and keeps saying "you should just pay your bills when you get them, because we've been sending you bills for eight months".
    • This other receptionist put a note in a patient's file that they needed to make an appointment to see the doctor before they could get some medication. Normally that would be fine, except that she's also under the delusion that because the note is in the patient's file, the patient should be magically aware of it immediately (never mind the fact that the file isn't in a public system). Then, when the receptionist denies the patient immediate access to the doctor, and the patient points out that they're on a special list on the wall immediately behind the desk guaranteeing them a meeting with the doctor without an appointment, the receptionist doesn't believe them and shouts at them instead. Fortunately this attracts the doctor, who when the receptionist refuses to back down has security remove her, while continuing to scream that she put a note in the file.
    • For these employees, customers apparently have to specifically ask for lettuce and tomato to be added to their BLT sandwiches. That lettuce and tomato are in its name, right after the bacon that they did add, means nothing.
    • Likewise for this restaurant, where a BBQ bacon burger apparently does not come with bacon - and, to add insult to injury, the waitress the submitter asked about it charged extra for the "add-on" after getting them the bacon they were supposed to get in the first place.
    • This Indian Telemarketer doesn't seem to understand that the family he's repeatedly calling is not interested in what he's selling despite the numerous times they insult him and threaten to call the police. The telemarketer finally stopped after the police contacted his superiors.
    • Despite the US Navy telling their cooks to put meat signs on their food so their Arabic guests won't accidentally eat food that is against their religious beliefs, one cook doesn't understand why he has to put a sign on his Calico corn despite the fact the dish contains pork.
    • This waitress apparently cannot comprehend that, while one member of a family cannot eat gluten (because he has celiac disease), the rest of them can eat it just fine.
      Waitress: I’ve never heard of a half-gluten family.
    • These two tech support don't seem understand because the submitter new computer is a Mac that runs OSX, they cannot install Internet Explorer which is only available on Windows.
    • This employee refuses to believe that the 24-year-old submitter has an unconventional middle name, screaming that she's been "lied to" even after the submitter explicitly states multiple times that the name in question is her middle name, not the first part of a hyphenated last name. The supervisor who scolds the employee and takes over notes that the employee always did this and was likely going to be let go because of that incident.
    • This submitter was suffering from excessive fatigue and oversleeping. The doctor, for whatever reason, decided his patient was clearly suffering from insomnia note  and needed to take over-the-counter sleep aids. "He's my ex-doctor now."
    • This credit card scammer calls a 12-year-old boy's cell phone, and simply cannot get through her head, even after being repeatedly told by the boy's mother that the boy cannot possibly have a credit card at his age.
    • This debt collector does not get the idea that "Steve" doesn't live in the household he is calling, and never has. Even after being told that "Steve" had died the previous spring, the collector continues berating and harassing the submitter at least three times a week, prompting her to file a complaint with the Attorney General.
    • This female co-worker does not seem to understand her male co-worker is a bisexual and not gay. Even worse, for all of her concerns that her male co-worker maybe being forced to "date" his girlfriend by his parents and not because he actually likes her, she immediately judges his girlfriend must be a transsexual as the reason why he's dating her and thinks he's into gay stereotypes like drag queens and good fashion sense.
    • This clerk at a post office refuses to let the submitter apply for a passport because they seemingly cannot wrap their mind around why the woman has a different surname from the one on her mother's birth certificate (which she had to present in order to apply for the passport). Surely it couldn't be because the name on the birth certificate is her mother's maiden name or something...
    • This bank manager is told repeatedly by the submitter that the "fraudulent" purchases that prompted his branch to freeze their account were theirs, yet still insists the purchases were fraudulent even after agreeing that the submitter spending their own money isn't fraud. And then he's surprised that the submitter wants to close their account due to not only this but the bank's failure to make sure the purchases were actually fraudulent before freezing the account, the fact the account was frozen without disputing the "fraudulent" purchases, and the fact a check cleared despite the freeze.
    • In this story, the customer orders bacon and cheese fries, but only gets cheese. The cashier and the manager keep thinking that he's referring to the cheese and point out that it's on there already despite the customer outright asking where the bacon is. The manager just tells the cashier to get him a new order while saying that he doesn't "feel like dealing with this right now", implying that he still doesn't get it.
    • This employee at a sandwich shop doesn't seem to understand that the customer wants a regular BLT sandwich without mayonnaise yet still gave her sandwich mayonnaise, and when she wants a replacement for her ruined sandwich, he added cheese on her replacement despite never once asking for it. Apparently he is unable to understand you can have a BLT sandwich without anything extra.
    • This Bank Representative doesn't seem to understand the submitter and her family are vacationing at a nearby city and the recent purchases on her credit card at the city are legit and not fraudulent yet the bank keeps flagging her card despite the submitter repeatedly explaining to them.
  • Threat Backfire: This vice-principal threatens to quit if the IT guy isn't fired. The principal accepts his resignation.
  • Too Dumb to Live:
    • This nurse downs an entire bag of pills, despite not knowing who they belong to or what they are for. Fortunately for her (and possibly unfortunately for the rest of us), they were mostly harmless lactose-intolerance pills, so no Darwin Award for her (at least, not yet).
    • These coworkers stop in the middle of a stairwell during a fire drill to take a selfie, endangering the people behind them as well as themselves. Had this been an actual emergency, photobombing their selfie (as the submitter suggested) would have been too light a reaction.
    • This guy has a nut allergy severe enough for him to take an Epi-pen to work everyday and thinks the reason for nearly dying after eating an ALMOND JOY! was that that it had coconut in it.
    • This office director points out that he's allergic to the nuts in the cake the office brought to celebrate a worker's birthday... and then pops a piece of the cake into his mouth anyway because he just wanted to see what it tasted like. Miraculously, he doesn't appear to have a reaction to it.
    • This genius soldier manages to corner himself with landmines. Fortunately he's extricated without coming to harm (aside from taking a verbal dressing-down by his commanding officer).
    • This submitter has PTSD and an aversion to being touched around the shoulders or back from behind. Despite their coworkers knowing about this issue, one coworker keeps patting them on the back or shoulder to get their attention. And despite being told repeatedly to not do it, this guy keeps doing it, and then complains to HR when his latest disregard of the submitter's condition resulted in him being punched in panicked self-defense.
  • Troll: When the submitter's boyfriend runs into a racist cashier who assumes he doesn't speak English despite the fact that he just did, the boyfriend responds by swapping to Mandarin until the cashier leaves in frustration, then swaps right back to English.


  • Wacky Cravings: The poster thinks this is going on in this story, and tries to warn the customer about the dangers. It turned out that while the customer's daughter is pregnant, she doesn't have a craving for mayonnaise — she's making deviled eggs for the baby shower.
  • Waif-Fu: Two former bouncers are hired for a security firm and notice a 5'1" girl in one of their training courses. They complain about the girl getting higher pay than them, just as one of the men is brought up for a demonstration with her. She then proceeds to flip him flat on his ass during the demonstration, much to his surprise. The instructor's line at the end sums it up perfectly.
    Instructor: Celebrities hire guys like you to stand in front of them and look scary; millionaire businessmen hire people like her if they want real security.
  • Walking Techbane: This submitter starts the story off with a list of various phone problems from over the years.
  • Waxing Lyrical:
  • What Could Possibly Go Wrong?: The worst they can say is no.
  • What Does This Button Do?: This new employee finds an unlabeled button near the register and presses it, thinking it might release something that they would have to clean. Turns out that button was the silent alarm and pressing it alerted the police. The employee doesn't end up reprimanded because, as their bosses say, they are not the first employee to do so. "People just like pushing buttons, even if they don’t know what they’re for."
  • Wham Line:
    • At the end of this story:
      Oh, and did I mention the boss was my step-dad?
    • In this story, about employees getting locked in while working late, dealing with the aftermath causes the boss and his wife to miss their flight to the U.S. for Christmas.
      The flight he was booked on, but had to cancel, was Pan Am 103.
    • One for this submitter after explaining her side of the situation to the general manager (and what saves her job):
      General Manager: You do know that our security system records audio, don’t you?
  • Who's on First?:
  • Who Watches the Watchmen?: Invoked by the title in this story where a safety inspector is scheduled for an investigation on Friday but decides to spontaneously arrive on a Wednesday. He is told to return on Friday, as the pregnant submitter and her co-worker who recently had surgery are the only ones on site and can't move the refrigerator to access the false wall hiding the water heater he needs to inspect. He has a fit and berates the submitter. However, it ends with an Offscreen Moment of Awesome for a customer who reports him to his company.
  • Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: Well, spiders in this case. It scares the guy so much he Screams Like a Little Girl.
  • Why We Can't Have Nice Things: This company stopped giving "fools' errands" to new employees after one nearly cost them over £1800. (Turns out, 'skyhooks' really do exist, though they're not used for holding up the sky.)
  • Workers Cannot Do Math:
    • Here are two people who don't understand fractions.
    • Here's one that doesn't understand subtraction, and hands the submitter $5 more than what they were supposed to.
    • Here's one who doesn't know how to convert a "recipe" for a quart of paint to a gallon.note 
    • “The new store in [city] just made $9,000 last week. That’s almost a million!” That's an epic case of Misplaced a Decimal Point, at best.
    • When a person fails to understand that 12 ounces are three quarters of a pound, it's somewhat understandable. When that person can't comprehend a fraction like "three quarters", it's this trope.
    • A dozen is twelve, but somehow these two never learned that.
      • Likewise, this cashier thinks that a dozen means twenty, but is quickly proven wrong when her manager makes her fetch a carton of a dozen eggs and then count them out to him. She was fired over the debacle soon after.
      • This bakery doesn't understand that a half-dozen is six, either.
      • This submitter splits two dozen donuts between three boxes, to which the cashier tries to charge them for three dozen - apparently a "dozen" is simply however many donuts happen to be in a box, rather than a concrete number.
    • This liquor store cashier doesn't seem to get that a customer born in 1989 is old enough to purchase alcohol in the UK in 2011. When the submitter tries to correct her and say that they are 21, she tries to use her own mathematics to prove them wrong... only to end up with 18 as her answer, which is still old enough to buy alcohol under UK law. Fortunately, the owner eventually steps in and rings up the submitter, and the cashier is fired some time later.
    • This sandwich shop worker doesn't understand what "cut it in half" means and has to be told to cut the sandwich into 2 pieces.
    • This lawyer cannot get a single printer to print a Word document - which turns out to be because he's telling the printers to print the fourth page of a document that only has three pages.
    • This coworker doesn't get that a drink which is three-thirds coffee would be all coffee.
    • This cashier doesn't know how "buy one, get one free" works.
      • This one, meanwhile, misunderstands the "buy" part and thinks the customer gets everything free.
    • The introduction to this story mentions that some of the interviews the submitter went to were doomed from the start, because they were looking for someone with five to ten years' experience with software that wasn't even two years old.
    • Same deal in this story, where the interviewer is looking for people with ten years' worth of work experience, but then refuses to hire the submitter who has double that, because he's not in his mid-20's and therefore cannot possibly know anything about computers. The submitter points out the ridiculousness of this as he's leaving by telling them "good luck finding someone who graduated at age 10".
    • This agent cancels a woman's tuition account because the woman didn't pay anything over the last two months, even when both the agent and the submitter plainly see that the woman's charges for those two months is zero dollars.
    • The submitter here gets an electric bill for £0.00. When he sends nothing, the company threatens to send bailiffs to recoup the amount of the debt, continually failing to understand that the bill is for "NAUGHT pounds and NAUGHT pence." It gets to the point that the submitter simply sends a check for £0.00 to satisfy the electric company.
    • A 32-year old new hire in this story is adamant that 6 x 2 = 13 despite two other people and two calculators telling her the answer is 12.
    • This cashier doesn't seem to understand the concept of sales tax, repeatedly insisting that the submitter's meal costs "$11 plus tax" rather than telling them the actual total amount with tax included. The shop's owner is not amused.
  • Worst Aid: The "Medical Office", "Hospital", and "Health & Body" tags are full of doctor don'ts, nurse nuisances, and receptionist rejections.
    • This story is particularly cringe-worthy.
    • Sometimes, it pays to explain things to the doctor—the hospital goes into a wild goose chase over a nurse's incorrect diagnosis until the patient finally is able to talk to a doctor and tell them what's wrong. The doctor gets a major Oh, Crap! moment when the patient's description of the symptoms hits home—turns out the patient had cancer!
    • These paramedics state that an elderly woman is being "uncooperative" all while completely ignoring the woman's family's insistence that she only speaks Finnish.
    • This doctor fails to notice a five-year-old girl has asthma, dismissing the girl's mother's arguments, even though she is a nurse and knows the symptoms of asthma. Worse, the doctor claimed to be a member of the board of Asthma Awareness. Fortunately, another doctor knows better and sends the girl to ICU, where she makes a full recovery.
  • Would Hurt a Child: Not in the usual sense that this trope implies, but this callous NICU nurse cares so little about her patients that she lays a premature baby down flat after nursing (causing her to vomit) and carelessly gives her breast milk from another baby's mother (which could have been contaminated).
  • Wounded Gazelle Gambit:
    • Inverted with this manager, who thinks an 8-months-pregnant cashier is faking a sickness. Turns out, it was very real.
    • Also inverted with this manager, who threatens to discipline the submitter for feigning illness to take the previous day off, despite them exhibiting obvious signs of illness and even passing out in front of her. Fortunately, the manager was later fired.
    • In this story the submitter's manager reveals that a customer accused them of racially abusing him. It turns out that the customer bullied the submitter when they went to school, and then cried racism whenever the submitter complained. When the coworker's classmate vouches for the submitter, the manager immediately drops the complaint.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: Quite a number of bosses and co-workers fall under this.
    • In this case, the manager believes he's in a Not Always Right story, handling a rude and aggressive customer. Turns out, he's in a Not Always Working story, with his waiter being mean.
    • This cashier thinks she is the Only Sane Man in a Not Always Right story to the end, refusing to let herself be proven wrong.
    • This repair company thinks they're in a Not Always Right story with yet another customer overreporting a problem (saying a ceiling fan was hanging by its wires; every other time someone's ever reported this to them, it was only the canopy that fell off). The electrician they eventually send to humor the crazy customer is quite surprised to find that said customer's problem was Not Hyperbole - unlike every other customer who reported that issue, her fan really was hanging by its wires and ready to fall at any moment.
  • Wrong Restaurant: Subverted in this story. A man goes into a vegetarian restaurant and orders a steak. The newly hired waitress (telling the story) has to inform him that as a vegetarian restaurant, they don't serve steak. But then the owner's daughter reveals that they do serve steak. It turns out she doesn't know what "vegetarian" means, and the owner doesn't have the heart to tell her - which leads to the restaurant closing down just weeks later after an actual vegetarian restaurant opens across the street.

  • Yandere: This bank teller tries to financially ruin a customer by falsely claiming he threatened her with a gun, resulting in his account being frozen, because he rejected her attempts to flirt with him.
  • You Are Already Dead: Discussed in this story by the submitter's shift leader after the two successfully get through a particularly busy stretch during their shift.
    Shift leader: It was like one of those samurai animes: some big eight-headed dragon of a ‘customer monster’ attacks, and the hero dashes past… then a breeze wafts by and all the heads pop off. You’re like the wind!
  • You Are Better Than You Think You Are: A coffee-shop employee gives a self-loathing coworker a pick-me-up this way, Drill Sergeant Nasty style. Note that the narrator delivered it that way because they thought the "self-loathing" coworker was just whining to get attention, and given that it apparently worked, they were likely right.
  • You Can't Miss It: This receptionist gives directions from the current doctor's office to the office of a specialist for people with color-blind vision... citing landmarks by color. Thankfully, once the patient spells out the problem, the receptionist finally seems to realize what they were doing wrong.
  • You Didn't Ask: A perfect demonstration of just how annoying this trope really is.
  • You Keep Using That Word:
    • The daughter of the owner of this restaurant doesn't know what the word "vegetarian" means.
    • Neither does this server. Given the circumstances, it's equally possible that he does know, but either doesn't know what counts as meat (since he claims chicken noodle soup and bacon have no meat), or is deliberately being an asshole to the vegetarian customer because someone else not eating what he likes offends his sensibilities (since, given the above thought process, he ignores the customer's request to not add bacon to their dish and then insults them over "self-image issues" for not eating the bacon).
      Needless to say, we didn't tip well.
    • This worker makes the opposite of the usual mistake, extending the definition to include rice and beans.
    • Maybe here. It's possible the boss meant someone else was killed in the accident, but it's not clear.
    • This trainee pilot doesn't quite understand what the "mile high club" is.
    • This developer keeps using the wrong terms for a piece of software, and can't be convinced to use the correct ones, except for one for loading icons that is little-known and, in all likelihood, taken as a much naughtier term.
  • You Make Me Sic:
    • This woman corrects a poorly-written comment from her manager.
    • This employee has made a habit of calling out sick, to the point where their boss (the submitter) demands a doctor's note the next time they come in to prove their "illness". The next day the employee brings a hastily typed up doctors note listing, a claim of "‘traumitic’ illness of the ‘lunges’". The unamused submitter immediately calls out the misspelled "lunges", but does not mention the also misspelled "traumitic".
  • Younger Than They Look:
  • Zillion-Dollar Bill: Nope, $2 bills exist.

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