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Affection-Hating Kid

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"Ewww! They're kissing again! Do we have to hear the kissing part?!"
Unnamed boy, The Princess Bride

We all know Real Men Hate Affection, right? Well, you wanna know who else hates affection? Kids— of both sexes, generally between the ages of about three and twelve.

These are the children who shout, "Ewww!" when they see people hugging or kissing, complain about stories that contain hugging or kissing (especially at the end), and protest if someone (usually a relative) tries to hug or kiss them.

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Sometimes they find it embarrassing (especially if it's their parents doing it), sometimes they find it boring (especially in the case of stories, e.g. "Stop kissing and get back to the plot!"). Maybe they hate the idea of them finding the opposite sex attractive, or even feel outright sick. Maybe they actually don't mind affection or finding the opposite sex attracttive, but are embarassed about openly showing or admitting it out of fear that a Circle of Shame will instantly materialize around them to point fingers and chant "Bob likes Alice! Bob likes Alice!". Other times they feel they're too old to be hugged/kissed/etc but other times, they just find it disgusting for no particular reason.

Often used to contribute to emotional scenes by establishing that even they want a hug/don't mind seeing people hug because the moment is just that sweet, or conversely, add comic relief to an emotional scene by having them complain about the mushiness.

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Compare and contrast Hates Being Touched— most Affection Hating Kids do hate hugs, but it's not the touching aspect that bugs them so much as the affectionate aspect. Contrast Puppy Love, Fille Fatale, and Dirty Kid. These kids are the most easily sickened by the Sickening Sweethearts and are prone to Parental Sexuality Squick. May be a Bratty Half-Pint or a Mouthy Kid and can also overlap with Hates Being Called Cute.

Obviously Truth in Television.


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Examples:

Advertising

  • "The Chase" is a classic Canadian PSA which shows a young boy running away from three girls. Unfortunately, he runs out of breath and the girls catch up to him and kiss him, much to his embarrassment. The message is to "Stay fit. 'cause you never know."

Anime & Manga

  • In JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders Jotaro Kujo apparently used to be a sweet boy according to his mother, but now he's a delinquent who rejects any affection that anyone tries to give to him, including his mother and adoring classmates.
    Holly: Silly boy! Here is your goodbye kiss! [attempts to kiss him]
    Jotaro: You're such a bitch! [Shrugs her off] Stop clinging to me like I'm still a little kid!
    Holly: [happily] Okay! Have a nice day!

Comic Strips

  • The titular character of Dennis the Menace (US) doesn't like his mother, Alice, hugging or kissing him when anyone else can see, especially neighborhood children. At least one daily panel actually has Dennis ducking down so nobody can see Alice holding him. He especially doesn't like it whenever Margaret shows some kind of affection for him.

Fan Works

  • In The Loud House fanfiction Substitute Roommate, Lincoln hates being hugged and kissed by his big sister Luna. In the Peeking Through the Fourth Wall episode where they MST the story, he critiques that by saying, "I'm eleven not six!". In another Peeking Through the Fourth Wall episode, this time reading Model Brother, Lucy walks away upon seeing Lincoln hug Leni and Lola hug Lisa because she's not a very "huggy" person as Lincoln put it.

Films - Animation

  • In Frozen II, Elsa is seen as a child being disgusted by her sister Anna's story that has everybody get married.
  • We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story: Louie, a young boy in New York, attempts to run away from home and join the circus, later revealing his motivation for doing so being that his mother was overly affectionate in public, and he was running due to embarrassment.
    "You should have my mother, slobbering kisses all over me. In public!"
  • The Emperor's New Groove: Pacha and Chicha's kids want to stay up past their bedtime. Pacha agrees, but warns them that they'll just be telling each other how much they love one another. The kids are grossed out and go to bed.
  • The Lion King (1994): Both Simba and Nala are disgusted when they find out that they are betrothed to marry each other some day, finding the idea of marrying their best friend too weird.

Films - Live-Action

  • In The Princess Bride, the boy initially complains whenever Wesley and Buttercup kiss in the book, but eventually gets used to it.

Literature

  • Bertie from Dirty Bertie, finds his neighbour girl Angela's kiddie crush on him (she claims she's his girlfriend but she's six and he's seven) disgusting and he's both disgusted and bored by romance movies.
  • In Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Greg finds it absolutely disgusting when his parents kiss or say, "I love you so much!" to one another. He also hates being kissed by his relatives because he's afraid they'll spread germs.
  • Subverted in I Don't Like Kisses, where the girl Samantha hates being kissed, but it turns out she doesn't mind other forms of affection.
  • In Kiss Kiss Yuck Yuck, Andy hates being kissed by his aunt Elsie, but puts up with it after she injures her leg.
  • In Miles Is The Boss Of His Body, six-year-old Miles hates being hugged, and the moral of the story is that hating being hugged is fine.
  • In Tales from Netheredge, Prince Adar (who is seventeen, by the way) reacts with disgust to his parental figures being Sickeningly Sweethearts in his presence. Immediately afterwards he snuggles up to his lover Piff (who he insists he isn't in love with, so it's fine).

Live-Action TV

  • Bumble has one episode where Boo is reading to a sick Peek and he says he feels sick. When Boo tells him to throw up in his bucket, he says, "No, not that kind of sick— kissing stories make me sick!"
  • There's a Sesame Street episode focused on Zoe not liking it when her aunt Chloe tickles her and coming up with crazy methods to prevent herself from being tickled.

Music

  • In "Hello Mudda Hello Fadda (A letter from camp)" by Allan Sherman, the kid writing the letter says that if he can come home,
I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me

Video Games

  • In the Living Books adaptation of The Berenstain Bears in the Dark, clicking on Brother in the library will make him go through various books and react to them. One book, a romance, he reacts to by slamming it shut and going "Ew, yuck!"
  • In Final Fantasy XIV, Orn Khai, a young dragonling, makes a hasty retreat when seeing his father get affectionate with his beloved after centuries of separation. Apparently even dragons can get repulsed by their parents being sappy and cuddly.

Western Animation

  • In the Adventure Time episode "Go With Me", Finn spends the whole episode looking for a girl to go to a couples-only cinema night with, but when he actually gets there he's so revolted by seeing all the grown-up couples in the audience kissing that he vomits and leaves.
  • In an episode of Arthur, Arthur finds Valentine's Day gross because he finds the idea of everyone falling in love too soppy.
  • The Fairly OddParents: In the episode "The Big Problem" where Timmy wishes he was an adult, one of the things he was excited to do was getting to see "grownup movies". He is then immediately grossed out when the couple on the screen start making out and it gets even worse for him when he notices his own parents a few rows ahead kissing during the movie. Timmy's dad even quips to his wife: "If Timmy were here, he'd say this is gross." This is subverted in a later episode; "The Boy Who Became Queen" where it is revealed that Timmy has a guilty pleasure for watching romantic soap operas.
  • The Loud House: Lincoln and Ronnie Anne (who are both eleven) are often disgusted whenever Lori (Lincoln's big sister) and Bobby (Ronnie Anne's big brother) are being romantic.
  • The Mighty Mouse: The New Adventures episode "Scrappy's Playhouse" has Mighty Mouse's ward Scrappy Mouse whinge and moan whenever he sees scenes from the old Mighty Mouse cartoons that involve Mighty Mouse and Pearl Pureheart embracing one another.
  • My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic: In "The Cutie Mark Chronicles" Scootaloo, the most tomboyish of the Cutie Mark Crusaders, is disgusted at a group hug and the "sappy" story that preceded it.
  • In Rugrats, Lil claims to hate kissing stories because "nothing ever happens".
  • The Simpsons: In "The Way We Was", Homer and Marge tell their children the story of how they fell in love, and after finishing the story, they happily embrace. While Lisa is touched, Bart pretends to puke.

Real Life

  • This is one of the symptoms of autism in children, which is when they reject cuddles and prefer to be left alone.

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