Eric Cartman's real father is actually Mr. GarrisonI think this may have been mentioned before, but I really feel that I have to delve into this one. Cartman and Garrison share many traits and the incident regarding the return of Mr. Hat in 200+201 could not be coincidence. Now, it is easy to see why not since Cartman and Garrison do not resemble one another. However, both of them have inherited most of their physical features from their mother's side of the family Garrison looks a bit more like his mom and Cartman resembles his mom while having the girth most of her family has). Now, I'm gonna divide into several different divisions.
South Park's water supply is badly contaminated with methylmercuryJust enough more than most places so that by their twenties the locals have accumulated so much that they become freaking idiots.
The longer it takes for Kenny to die, the longer it takes for him to come back
Magic: The Gathering alignments
The Flanderization is all due to the machinations of the Cult of SkaroAlright, this might need some explanation, the characters of South Park's universe, along with Family Guy and The Simpsons, are being manipulated by the Cult of Skaro, who are making the characters behave in a way they wouldn't do normally, allowing the characters to help them proceed to their ultimate goal; reality itself being conquered. They are using different tactics with each universe; with this one, Sec, realising that this universe is pretty much a Crapsack World already, is not really focusing on this universe and is leaving it in the hands of his people there (Kyle and Cartman). Kyle and Cartman? Deliberately working with Sec and are currently manipulating others into helping them. The problem with them is that Sec picked a duo who do not get on very well and are trying to one-up each other to look good in front of Sec, by making sure the other fails. In Cartman's case, it's because he simply likes the idea of each universe being chaotic or Sec told him that he would have free reign to unleash his sociopathic tendencies on a universal level (which will ultimately revealed to be Sec lying to him). In Kyle's case, it's because he genuinely believes (or knows) that working with Sec will make his universe, as well as others, a better place, making him a Well-Intentioned Extremist who believes Utopia Justifies the Means.
Character Alignment based on Season 5 onward
Eric Cartman is clearly an Outer God.Most probably Azathoth. Think about it; a big fat blob that sits around in one spot all the time, and insists on being entertained. Plus, the descriptor of “blind idiot”, and his completely amoral (rather than immoral) ethics: human concerns like common decency are simply beneath him, nor are they really even comprehended by Cartman. But the real evidence proving that Cartman is obviously an avatar or aspect of the Great Nuclear Chaos was the seeming ease with which he manipulated and commanded Dread Cthulhu. Only an Endless One could do that, and Cthulhu has been known to serve Azathoth…and in this case, his Cartman avatar…when the stars come right (thanks to BP, in this instance).
Timmy is aware his world is a TV show."Living a Lie!"
Scott opened his Box of Faith early.This was why all the other Canadians started calling him a dick.
Mr. Garrison is telekinetic, and suffering from split-personality disorder.Well, it would definitely explain the whole Mr. Hat and Mr. Twig fiasco. Both are, in fact, effectively extensions of Mr. Garrison's personality, but he subconsciously animates them with his powers, explaining how Mr. Hat was able to move around independently in the episodes "Summer Sucks" and "Chef Aid", and why, in the latter episode, he was capable of driving a car (and freeing Chef and Garrison from jail, no less) without being physically able to push the gas pedal.
Kenny's family is filthy rich.
Eric Cartman most probably thinks that Kyle's family is filthy rich.
Eric Cartman grows up to become Peter Griffin from Family GuyNo, really. They're both fat jerks.
When he was younger, Kenny's dad worked as a mercenary.The genetic reincarnation theory up there would explain the respawns, and Kenny's sadistic tendencies would be explained if he found out about his father's past work.
Imaginationland is the world of Grand Unifying GuessesSeeing as they were tired of us tropers attempting to unify every franchise, the Trinity of WMG created a world that proves every theory made right. The dark side of the wall is the Dark World.
South Park is set in the same universe as Peanuts.Hence explaining similarities in appearance and the incredible rudeness of the children. Charlie Brown and his friends grew up in The Fifties South Park.
Garrison is homosexualFirst Garrison thought he was straight, then admitted his homosexuality. After the sex change she later became a lesbian. This shows that Garrison isn't specifically attracted to either men or women but only to persons of his/her current gender. After the latest sex change he'll turn gay again.
Cartman is a Lady Gaga fan.
The four kids will grow up to become the Gun Show Anime Club.
Scuzzlebutt escaped from Imaginationland.While the boys, Jimbo and Ned were out camping at Mt. Evanston, Cartman makes up the story of Scuzzlebutt. Once Scuzzlebutt came into existance in Imaginationland, he somehow found a way to escape from there and enter the real world. Judging from the reactions everyone got from Scuzzlebutt's appearance (with Cartman expressing the most shock and Chef and Mr. Garrsion showing apparent familiarity with the creature), it is possible that Cartman also told Chef and Mr. Garrison the Scuzzlebutt story beforehand.
Craig grows up to be...Noah from Total Drama Island. Deadpan Snarker ahoy!
Cartman is the Big Bad of South ParkAs was mentioned above, Cartman is a psychopath and a fan of Hitler. He has a higher death count than the devil and anti-christ put together. Hell, he revealed his darkness when he ground up his rival for the week's parents into chili and tricked him into eating it over a few dollars. When he gained the power to create, he made monsters. He closes his eyes he sees holocaust and flame and to him this is normal. How did this start? I believe Pip gave us the warning way back in 'Damien.' Cartman was being made fun of until Pip arrived and all the kids moved their aggression to Pip. For an adult, being made fun of would be a ridiculous excuse. For an 8 year old with his mental problems, this is a motive worthy of murder. So, Cartman decided he was going to kill everyone in South Park, but he needed a cover so no one would take him seriously. Cue an episode of All in the Family where he saw Archie Bunker. That's when he discovered the perfect disguise, anger, rage, racism, chauvenism, all out in the open. It's brilliant. The last season will be a time skip to the boys 18th birthday. South Park will be completely destroyed, everyone will be dead, except for Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski. They'll have to face down and defeat their old "friend." And give Kyle proper revenge for all the anti-semetic comments.
Cartman is just big bonedLook at his family. They're all obese except for his mom. As an adult he keeps his general appearance though obviously slimmer due to taking care of himself and since he isn't a child.
Cartman's father isn't Jack TenormanIt was a lie and his father is someone else. Or they got the DNA test wrong.
Kenny has the same "Soul reservoir" resurrection ability as Mudou.It makes so much sense.
Stan's puking at Wendy is a sign of disgust, not nervousnessIt's hard to tell what his feelings are due to his personality and his young age. But compared to the other kids, he doesn't seem all that romantically interested in Wendy. Maybe he thinks he's in love with her but isn't. Matt has stated that he's the most likely to be gay, but his reason was stereotypical and shallow.
There are two subspecies of humans in the South Park universe: mortals and immortalsThe immortal ones can resurrect whenever they want to. Most celebrities are immortals, this would explain how could they come back in 200. Kenny is also an immortal. His long absence was caused by his unvillingness to resurrect; he wanted to take a break from being killed horrifically Once an Episode.
Butters's parents aren't actually abusive.Think about it. When he's his meek self, he gets picked on. And his parents ground him. When he was a "vampire" he had a ton of confidence and couldn't get grounded. His getting grounded never comes up when he pretended to be Professor Chaos. When he's acting sensitive, he has a Butt Monkey complex and sees any actions his parents do as bad. When he has confidence, they're pretty good to him. As for "Jared Has Aides" and the episode with Ben Afleck and his parents? Cartman was pretending to be Butters, and Butters was imagining his picture as a normal one, respectivelly.
Butters' parents are VERY abusive.
Kenny is JesusYeah, I know Jesus exists in this world (it's pretty much the basis of the theory). Jesus' power is Resurrection, the ability to return from death. Kenny has done this constantly for the whole run of the show (even when he really DID die and had his ashes consumed by Cartman). He's the second coming of Jesus and South Park is Purgatory.
Butters is a male-to-female TranssexualHe just gives me that vibe in general. He did like crossdressing a bit too much, more so then the typical crossdresser.
The eye colors are like this.Kenny - Blue. Originally brown as stated in "How to eat with your butt" (Cartman described him as having a "winking brown eye") and hazel according to the draft of The Movie. Now blue, as shown in his anime form, Major Boobage, and Starvin' Marvin. Kyle - Brown eyes. Well, they were in his anime form. He had black hair too, but maybe he just didn't think ninjas looked good with red hair or dislikes it. Cartman - Brown eyes. He should have blue now due to an eye transparent with Kenny, but a continuity snarl applies here. A few official drawings of him have him with brown eyes Stan - Blue. Confirmed in "A Very Crappy Christmas" though his anime form had brown ones. Apparently ninjas can't have blue eyes either.. Craig - Blue. His anime form. Wendy - Gray or brown. ..I can't remember where it was stated but I recall seeing it or at least it being hinted.
Mr. Garrison's Mom Molested HimOK, that part is obviously canon. But the real guess comes here: she molested him as a young child, forever damaging the way he looked at sex (which may help explain his constant changes in orientation). He thought it was wrong, and so asked her why she did it and she replied "Oh ummmm. It's because I loved you sweety. That's a sign of love." Being a naive child, he believed her, later wondering why his dad wasn't "loving" him, and the rest is history. Their interactions years later is just his mom keeping up the charade.
Another Cartman/Wendy episode will happen within the next four seasonsBelligerent Sexual Tension by the bucket. I expect it to be something revolving around the gang and the pairing.
Homosexuality has complex ramifications in the South Park universeNote that this might only apply to males, as lesbians have not really been touched upon. Anyway, sexuality in South Park is a spectrum, although everyone is at least "a little gay," with some being "very, very gay" (i.e. Mr. Garrison). Suppressing homosexuality turns into an obsession with being in control of other males (Mr. Garrison is always in control of his relationship and is obsessed with being the teacher, Stephen is always in control of Butters, Cartman is obviously obsessed with authoritah, Jimbo is in charge of his "relationship" with Ned, Randy suppressed it with Gerald in the hot tub and has since turned into the de facto leader of South Park), and possibly insanity (the suicides in the conversion camp, Jimbo's crazed hunting, Randy's ever-increasing stupidity). The more homosexual and overall horny they are, the crazier they get (Garrison wanting to be molested by his parents, split personality, complete disregard for his students' lives, going through the entire sexual spectrum including the opposite sex and back). Had Garrison not suppressed it, he would have ended up more like Mr. Slave (proud, happily married, and acknowledging that the life of a whore is a bad one). The Super Adventure Club learned of this and have been suppressing their feelings for adult males in order to become fully committed to authority and shed themselves of any remorse in their pursuit of power, while having sex with boys in order to prevent insanity. Members who lean closer to heterosexuality have sex with girls to prevent the opposite (chaos). They have also possibly been manipulating factions such as NAMBLA, the Church of Scientology, and Alcoholics Anonymous in their quest. Butters may be the only organism to be 100% straight, and since he does not release enough of this heterosexuality (mostly due to his father's demands and friends' teasing), he occasionally has a desire to unleash chaos upon the world. Similarly, Big Gay Al may be the only organism to be 100% homosexual, hence why both characters are pretty much the purest non-Mormon people. Mormons are special and possibly ignore these rules. (Possibly connected to polygamous practices, although that aspect has never been touched upon by the show.)
The "other dimension" that DP drilled into was in fact Imaginationland
Butters will eventually be promoted to the opening title.
Kenny will blackmail the Joozians to let humanity back into the galactic community
The newest episode will result in either Cartman or Kenny being Killed Off for Real
Trey and Matt were lying when the said they killed Kenny off because they were 'sick of him'.
Coon 2: Hindsight, Mysterion Rises, and Coon and Friends V.S. The Coon and possibly The Coon will be edited into a straight to DVD movie like Imaginationland
Al-Queda diving aircraft carriers toward the end of It's a Jersey Thing is another big statement regarding the Muhammad controversyIt's apparently okay to show Muslim terrorists crashing airplanes into civilians, but not okay to show Muhammad.
Kenny is the spawn/mortal incarnation of an Old One/Outer GodDuring one of the cult's meetings they temporarily summoned one of the Old Ones (probably Yog-Sothoth, Cthulhu, or Nyarlathotep) and had it rape Kenny's mom while she was drunk.
Kenny was offered as a sacrifice to the Old Ones
The Universe is trying to kill Kenny
South Park is cursed
Kenny's powers are not limited just to his immortality.
Cartman saved the world.
Cartman is part-Kenny.
South Park WILL show Muhammad eventually.There's no way Parker and Stone will give up on this. Every few seasons they will try again until Comedy Central relents and Muhammad is shown on the air. By the time this happens the taboo on Muhammad will be broken and the world will be a better place. After all, either all of it is OK or none of it is.
South Park used to be known by another name: InnsmouthOK, before I give this theory, let me acknowldge the flaws: South Park is in the middle of Colorado whereas Innsmouth was specifically stated to be on the coast of New England. I know that, but just put that aside for a minute. I don't know, assume South Park used to be on the Colorado River, and thats how they established contact with the Deep Ones. Anyway: South Park used to be known by the name of Innsmouth, where they worshipped Cthulhu, Dagon, and Hydra (the cult of Cthulhu is still their, but the Order of Dagon was disbanded following a combined U.S. Marine assault on the town). Following the plot of Call of Cthulhu: DCOTE, detective Jack Walters is sent to investigate the town, looking for disappeared person Brian Burnham. Walters investigates the town, and finds many... interesting things. Eventually, the Order decides he's too close to the truth, and attempt to kill him. They fail, and he sneaks and fights his way out of Innsmouth along with Brian. He eventually makes it to an army of U.S. Marines preparing for the assault on Innsmouth. A lot of the marines were killed by The Deep Ones and Father Dagon (whom Walters defeated later), but eventually the marines took the town. Everyone who wasn't a Cultist (and a few who were) were moved away from the town into a newly built town to solve the refugee problem: South Park. This may explain why all these strange events seem to happen in this otherwise unimportant little town. It's cursed, due to the deal with the Deep Ones that Obed Marsh made (I'm not spoiling that part of the games plot). Not only that, but many residents of South Park are descended from people who lived in (or traveled to) Innsmmouth. Lucas Mackey is an ancestor of Mr.Mackey. Henry Garrison (the crazy man in the jail cell) is an ancestor of Mr.Garrison. Captain Obed Marsh is an ancestor of Stan, Randy, Sharon, and Shelley Marsh. Most importantly, Jack Walters is the ancestor of both Cartman and Kenny (he was Kenny's great grandpa, but Cartman's great grandma was a dirty slut). Inheriting Jack's abilities and abnormal nature may explain why Cartman was so loved by Cthulhu and why he is immune to the memory wipe that usually happens when Kenny dies.
Eric Cartman is the reincarnation of H.P. Lovecraft.They share not just a few character traits.
Mr/Miss Garrison is a parody of Easy Sex ChangeSince s/he is exactly what would result from one in real life.
The kids will grow up to be Jordan Chase's Circle from the fifth season of Dexter.See the Dexter Wild Mass Guessing page.
The other members of Coon & Friends (except maybe Cartman) will eventually get superpowers, too.
Kenny is sexually abusedIt fits him. Plus how else would an eight year old, nevertheless a poor one, know so much about sex?
One of the kids is gayBut it isn't one of the main gang; not Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Cartman, or Butters. Also, another is either bicurious or bisexual.
Butters will grow up to be Dr. Horrible.For some reason, at some time in the future, Butters will drop the name Prof. Chaos for Dr. Horrible. Dougie (General Disarray) might be Moist.
Kenny will grow up to become an ambassador between Heaven, Earth, and HellBeing immortal has it's downsides, but it also opens up career opportunities.
Bradley will no longer be seen in school (or ever, except as minor cameos).Keeping him around, even if he does absolutely nothing, will just make you ask "Why doesn't he just solve the problem of the week?" Plus, he said he's off to find out what happened to his birth parents. He also wasn't seen in Creme Fraiche, despite being a common Living Prop in cafeteria scenes. His vacant seat will probably be taken by Jason, Dog Poo, or just someone the animators like. (This is not unprecedented; Jimmy took Pip's seat halfway through season 11.)
The entire universe is an Eldritch Abomination.Specifically, it's the very embodiment of Black Comedy. Every show that has been flanderized is a result of this horror visiting the universe for a bit. Some more than others. Plus Rule of Cool
Ms. Crabtree was killed off because none of the newer voice actresses could get her voice rightAfter Mary Kay Bergman's untimely death, Ms. Crabtree's voice was the one that suffered the most. Perhaps they decided to kill her off because she just wasn't the same without her old voice.
Kenny has never died.Kenny has some sort of mental problem that causes him to hallucinate. The entire show is from his point of view explaining all the crazy things that happen. Due to his mental problem, he has a tendency to become hyperactive and excited. When he becomes too hyper, he has to take meds to calm him down. While taking the meds, Kenny likens his slowed down state to death and believes that he has died. This is why everyone denies his claims to have died because he never really died, he only thought he did. In Kenny dies, Kenny is taken to a mental hospital to be cured. His friends visited him for awhile, but then when his problems became too severe the hospital forbade anyone from visiting him. When his friends stopped visiting him, he believed that he died again. The hospital was finally able to help him out. He still hallucinates, but he no longer has to take the meds all the time which is why he no longer dies.
Kenny death unification theoryAn attempt to unify all of Kenny's recorded deaths, resurrection and references to his death. When Kenny dies, there are three possibilities 1) A short duration of oblivion. Kenny sees neither heaven nor hell. Everyone remembers him dying until he resurrects by child-birth. People are unable to wonder where Kenny was for the duration of time he was absent by death. 2) Kenny goes to heaven. When in heaven, Kenny stays dead for several days and during this time, people are able to remember his death. Instead of resurrecting through child-birth, he resurrects through a ray of light. 3) Kenny goes to hell. When in hell, Kenny stays dead for several days and during this time, people are able to remember his death. Resurrection in this manner has not been seen yet. Whether Kenny goes to heaven, hell or neither is determined by whether a deity cares enough to get him to his domain, despite only being capable of staying there for a matter of days. There is an exception to the memory erasure however, in the form of people who wouldn't care about Kenny dying all the time, because they are too busy with themselves, like Cartman. Any holes in the theory?
There's an in-series reason for the Negative Continuity and floating timelineThey reference often to previous episodes, despite the fact the dates have retconned every year; for example, the gang should be born in 2002 now.
The reason Joe Biden isn't in About Last Night is because Mc Cain and Obama cared enough about the country to make sure there would be a President.Biden is clueless enough not to notice a huge conspiracy to steal the Hope Diamond, and Mc Cain and Obama figure that if they and Palin are presumed dead that the electoral college, which votes six weeks after election day, will elect Biden as President (definitely if Obama won, and if Mc Cain won, it's a toss-up between this and drafting Mike Huckabee or Mitt Romney to take over as President).
Hat McCullough really did kill those 23 babies in self-defenseWith this show, its not unfathomable.
Sooner or later, there will be a South Park episode about the male Periphery Demographic of shows like My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic....because this is just the kind of weirdness South Park likes to deal with. (Also, it would be cool.)
The series is going to end with an epic Snap Back...to the very beginning of the show. The way it figures, things will keep changing for the more bizarre (Cartman and Kyle becoming closer friends, Sharon and Randy's divorce, Stan's cynicism, and there's probably a lot more status quo to break) until the very fabric of the South Park universe implodes in on itself and it all goes back to the early days. Yes, including the revival of characters such as Pip and Ms. Crabtree (and possibly Chef if they just recycle old clips of him from other episodes). And then it just ends.
Kyle and Cartman will team up to cure Stan's cynicismThe two will realize that they're becoming closer friends and become deeply disturbed by it. They decide to cure Stan's cynicism so they won't EVER become best friends.
The events of "You're Getting Old" was All Just a Dream.(not the original poster) Oh god, please, please, please, PLEASE let this be true. DX
Beatrix Potter infiltrated the Hare Club for Men.Somehow, Beatrix Potter became the first woman to learn about the Hare Club and learn the truth about St. Peter. She gave clues in her story "The Tale of Peter Rabbit". The name "MacGregor" means "Son of the All Watchful One", meaning Mr. MacGregor represents Christ. Peter Rabbit escapes MacGregor three times, just as Peter denied Christ three times. While escaping, Peter Rabbit loses his shoes and a blue coat with brass buttons. The shoes represent Earth while the coat represents Heaven. MacGregor uses Peter Rabbit's clothes to make a scarecrow just as Christ made Peter the first Pope. The signs are all there! You just have to look!
The series finale will reveal that South Park is actually the creation of an autistic child's mind.
Kenny is a reality warper / GodHe dies in every episode as a way to escape his life of eternal control. He is aware of his prowess that's why every thing always works out for the best and he doesn't worry about things.
The whole show is seen through the eyes of a local drug addict tripping on LSD who lives across the street from the bus stopIt would explain why the characters look like construction paper, Kenny keeps dying, and weird stuff keeps happening around town. In the real world, South Park is a normal, quiet town.
In the future Kenney will become a scientist and will cause his own ImmortalityDuring middle or High school Kenny will become intrested in science to try to learn how he keeps dying and coming back, leading him a carer as a quantom phycisist, years into the future he finally discovers how he came back to life over and over again and manages to create technology that allows other's to come back to life in much the same way, but since Kenny has to repeatedly die and come back to life so as to be inspired to create this machine in the first place, future Kenny instructs scientist's of the future that as soon as travel to the past becomes possible someone must go back in time to give past Kenny the treatment so he will be able to iinvent the tech in the future
Cartman embodies all of the Seven Deadly Sins at once.Think about it. Cartman is fat and eats a lot (Gluttony), often motivated by money or gaining something (Greed), hates it when others have something he wants (Envy), is quick to anger and never hesitates to tell people he hates them (Wrath), gets sick pleasure out of weird places (Lust), is self-centered and arrogant, as well as prone to Self-Serving Memory (Pride), and is always the first (besides Stan) to leave when he doesn't like something (Sloth).
Additionally, he and the other boys are the individual sins, too.Kyle is Wrath (he's usually motivated by anger), Stan is Sloth (he prefers to ignore his problems over actually dealing with them and complains when he actually has to do something), Cartman is Greed (he would be Gluttony, but he's more commonly motivated by greed), Kenny is Lust (for obvious reasons), Craig is Pride (he tends to look down on the boys), Tweek is Gluttony (the coffee addiction) and Wendy is Envy (she hates it when people pay attention to someone other than her).
Shelley Marsh sees things as turds the same way Stan sees things as s**t when he turned 10.
Stan will cure his excessive cynicism by having himself vaccinated against HPV, in order to make himself "retarded."Matt and Trey, in the next episode, will follow through on the vaccine derpitude alluded to in "Ass Burgers."
Kyle and Wendy will get together sometime in S15.Just to see those two random kids' (from the episode Ass Burger) reaction to this happening.
Stan has Gone Mad From The Revelation that Status Quo Is God, and will have an arc for the rest of the season trying to avert it.Really, the ending seems to deny this, but look at how he's frozen in shock through the whole "everything goes back to normal" montage.
Kyle's turn at learning to grow up may involve suicidal tendencies
The series finale will involve the grey aliens from the first episode
In A Ladder to Heaven the boys abandoned their ladder when it was only a survivable jump away from finished.And that's how Saddam Hussein escaped back to Earth.
Stan isn't cynical he just suffered from a puberty style Logic Bomb.Ok this whole episode started with an argument about how Tween Wave sounded like crap right. Stan is at the age (in South Park style.) Where he is beginning to believe that what his parents say is finally coming true. Yet he doesn't like their music either because it also sounds like crap. In this mindset, he should be hating tween wave because he is becoming an adult. However as he is still a kid he still doesn't like the music his parents like. This goes on and on in his head driving him nuts until the bomb explode. In order for it to stop there was only one possible solution: Everything was Crap.
Stan as well as everyone else who applies literally sees and hears everything as crap.As some cruel joke or whatever, Stan became "cynical" because something caused him to literally hear and see crap. The same applies to adults who probably think their kids love to listen to farting sounds all day.
Kyle is Cartman's personal scapegoat.Just as Hitler blamed Germany's problems on those of the Jewish faith, Cartman takes out his anger of his own life on Kyle.
The Human CentiPad was a plot by Steve Jobs to teach people the dangers of blindly agreeing to terms and conditions without reading them.Which is why during the announcement of the Human CentiPad he keeps emphasizing that the three victims AGREED to the procedure.
In "The List", Wendy thought out the plan to get Kyle to the bottomBecause of her feelings for him. She also helped out the overly complicated plot, which accidently got Kyle to the bottom, to get back in contact with Stan. They could easily "just" have promoted Clyde to first, then made the list from there. During the episode, it's said that "Craig had to be moved to number 12, Jimmy up and Jason down" (Something like that). Furthermore Kyle had to be moved down, as Bebe refers to Kyle as a "casualty". Wendy is often shown as intelligent and good with words, which means that she could talk them into making that list like that.
Cynicism runs in the Marsh familyNote how Stan became an alcoholic—just like his dad. Shelley calls everyone a turd because that's what she sees them as. Marvin is suicidal because he is tired of seeing the world as shit and he's too old to just drown it away with alcohol. Also, Stan is slowly transforming into Randy—note how he acts suspiciously like him in "Bass to Mouth" (rallying a group of people to fight something he was supporting just a moment earlier). The alcohol is killing his brain cells.
Eric Cartman is an innocent Chaotic Evil.While he does appear selfish and even malevolent like most villians he really doesn't concept the reality of his misdeeds much like a toddler or infant doesn't understand what the reality of their actions. Unlike most people he doesn't believe in a good or evil or order and chaos; the only thing he knows is "cool or lame". He doesn't comprehend the concept of morality just fun. He is shown to do good deeds out of the sheer kindness of his heart on rare occasions so he can't be all evil. An example of this is in "Cartman's Sucks" when he doesn't know severity of his misdeed unlike his friends until he is told about it. "Whatever whatever I do whatever I want" seems to be his motto. He is much like a spoiled rotten brat with a slight intellectual backbone.
Cartman is homosexualIn the Imagination Land episodes, at the end, Cartman forces an imaginary Kyle to give an imaginary Cartman oral sex, and the whole two following episodes involved Cartman following Kyle around, trying to get Kyle to give him oral sex. And, in another episode, Cartman kisses Kyle at the end, although I am not sure which one. Not to mention that him and Butters fooled around somewhat (while Butters was asleep).
Bebe is going to grow up to become a Gold DiggerAt the beginning of the series, she seems smart and proud of herself, but then later uses the Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset, and then experimenting with getting high on cough medicine, and then dating Clyde to get shoes.
Kenny will eventually get some girl pregnantIt seems all of the characters are starting to go through problems growing up, and Kenny, since he is always so horny, will be faced with teen parenting/pre-teen parenting.
Kenny will become/is already a Memetic Sex God.He's a Lovable Sex Maniac with Shonen Hair, and the Ensemble Dark Horse alter ego of Mysterion. Combine this with the popularity of anime-style South Park, and this has a lot of potential to become a fangirl magnet.
Guess the sexual orientation/identity of the characters!
Stan is a Chaotic Neutral.He is basically this personified in South Park. He doesn't feel to strong about anything specific and feels pretty indifferent towards the concept of morality. He doesn't possess any good or bad intentions and is sometimes the hero in the show and even the Big Bad as seen in "The day after tommorrow" and "The mystery of the urinal deuce". If he's not any of those he's just another neutral bystander that happens to possess an opinion.
When Butters grows up, he'll become the most successful Pimp in Colarado. And contend with Cartman.Again. Yeah, I like Butters a LOT.
The Cult of Cthulhu has been masterminding all the stupidity of South Park and Kenny's immortality.The Cult of Cthulhu wanted to make sure that, when Cthulhu rises, he gets the job done. To do so, they needed to ensure no-one was smart enough to pull a Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu? on them, so they've spent their time lowering the collective intellect of mankind. Notice how certain characters like Randy Marsh were once intelligent, but now have become Too Dumb to Live. Blame the Cult. They've also been lowering our intelligence with various authoritaHs. Mr Garrison was used to wear away our learning capabilities, Officers Barbady and Harrison to weaken our forces, and manatees to weaken our imagination. Speaking of imagination, the terrorists got ahold of Imaginationland and thanks to the Cult. Jesus, Santa, Satan and even God? They aren't. The only gods are the Outer Gods, and these figures are beings from Imaginationland. Kenny serves as the Soul Jar of Cthulhu. Why is he immortal? Because he carries the soul of Cthulhu. The reason? If someone ever manages to kill Cthulhu, he'll regenerate as a lich. And, given the nature of the undead, being attacked by nukes will empower the zombie Cthulhu. However, they also knew Cthulhu could take them out. The solution? Find a way to take out Cthulhu. Since Kenny is Cthulhu's Soul Jar, if Cthulhu kills him, it'll backfire. In short, the Cult of Cthulhu are a group of Dangerously Genre Savvy magnificent chessmasters. Thankfully, they do have enemies. There are another group of cultists, led by the Elder Gods(likely Kthanid and Nodens). They've been doing their best to thwart the Cult of Cthulhu, by bringing forth sanity. The Elder Gods have mated with humans in order to produce people to fight Cthulhu. These include H.P Lovecraft(hence why he knows about such entities), Bradle Biggy(as he did stop Cthulhu) and Eric Cartman(he seems to remember Kenny dying)
Kenny is an illegitimate child.Nobody else in his family has blond hair. And it's not like Mr. and Mrs. McCormick are really devoted to each other.
There will be an episode with Kenny and Ms Cartman.I say this because one is the town slut and Cartman's mom and the other is a Lovable Sex Maniac. I would find it funny if done right.
Predictions for the jobs taken by the students when they grow up.
Kenny is Captain Jack Harkness.
Kyle has Psychic Abilities, but does not believe in them himself.
Kenny is the reincarnation of Rika Furude.
Butters possesses the Element of KindnessAnd adding to that;
Faith Hilling will become a Memetic Mutation in real life
Headed on town to Panem, gonna have ourselves a time...The Capitol is South Park, Colorado. The first President of Panem was Eric Cartman, who finally and successfully seized power. He then began his plan to re-locate and separate the hippies, gingers, Jews, etc. District 1 got all the hippies, which is why they have silly names like Glimmer and Marvel, and he punished them by forcing them to make spurious luxury goods.
Kenny's mom is his Soul Jar.Consider that, whenever Kenny dies, he's literally reborn from his mother. Ms Mc Cormick is a living Soul Jar for Kenny(probably because she spent time with the Cult of Cthulhu). She might have some level of control over this-when Kenny died via muscular dystrophy, Kenny's mom used her strength of will to let Kenny rest. At least until she starts missing her a whole bunch, of course. Kenny may actually know this, but doesn't do anything about it because Kenny isn't the kind of guy to kill his mom. Even Cartman loves his mom! It's possible that Ms Mc Cormick is immortal due to the Cult(read my "Cult of Cthulhu rules everything" WMG), however, if she isn't, it means that Kenny may eventually stay dead(hopefully). In the meantime, there's drugs and sex for Kenny.
There will be an Anime-style high school episode of South Park.It would be a nice nod to the fan's love of college-aged members of the main characters, and an anime style.
Randy Marsh is, to an extent, Obfuscating Stupidity.There is some stupid in there, of course(this is South Park after all), but it is possible that he's isn't a complete idiot. It's been revealed that many of the wacky adventures he's had are just to cover the fact he's unsatisfied with his life. Given that these adventures highlight his "stupidity", I posit that he is, at best, The Ditz. Randy takes the view that "ignorance is bliss", and feels that if he acts Too Dumb to Live, it might help him get over the suckiness of his life.
Butters/Professor Chaos will get back at his parents.He's already becoming quite badass, having become The Messiah to the Mexicans. "The Tale of Scrootie Mc Boogerballs" shows that he's growing a backbone, so I don't think he's going to take their crap forever. I can see Mr and Mrs Stotch ground him for doing nothing wrong in any way(as opposed to ground him for some minor inconvenience. Cue Butters realising what his parents really are, and eventually leading them to a Humiliation Conga that makes them treat him better.
Stan is starting to take after his father.Recent seasons (14 onward )has Stan being much less of the Straight Man and have had him take a few levels in Jerkass. He's engaged in ecoterrorism, become an alcoholic, exploited Butters for a video that would make him famous (and subsequently jack off in San Diego, and subject his friends to a boring trip to get a 5th gen Ipod Nano.
Dr. Pepper is Trey Parker's favorite beverage.Because come on, why else would it represent over half of what people drink on the show, with its logo directly in front for all the viewers to see? It's not like SPS needs Coca Cola Corp.'s money anyway, and if it were about the money they'd give the same treatment to other famous products of theirs, as a variety of soft drinks would give them more revenue.
There will be an episode that mocks the Brony subculture.The Subculture is growing at a moderately high rate so eventually there going to do it. As a brony, this troper can't wait, I'm just so intrested to hear how there going to poke fun at us.
The Evil Eric Cartman from the episode "Spooky Fish" is the Cartman we've seen in South Park since that episodeThe whole episode prior to sending their Cartman to the evil universe was a ploy by the Evil Cartman to appear as good, perhaps as a Zanatos Gambit involving the future of South Park and possibly the end of the world. The "I Hella Fooled You Guys" remark was an evil boast after the original Cartman was sent to the evil dimension (which would explain the "Screw You Guys" remark as he's being shot by that gun.) Plus this explains why every memorable evil act that Cartman did came after that episode. Kickstarter, which has been ripe for parody in the last several months.
Cartman will be revealed to have some sort of gender identity issuesOr at least others will think he does and send him to a therapist.
Some of the children will get design changesConsidering Bebe has had breast growth and Butters can now ejaculate it seems like they're entering puberty little by little. They may finally become fifth graders.. If you look at the sixth◊ graders◊ they're noticeably taller than the iconic design used for the other kids. Maybe one of the episodes will revolve around one of the kids hitting a growth spurt.
They'll never do an episode on My Little Pony: Friendship Is MagicIt's too expected of them.
Lizzy's parents were a part of the Cult of Cthulhu.In the early seasons there was a girl named Lizzy that was very much a Distaff Counterpart to Kenny. She wore a parka, had a vile mouth (though not as vulgar since it wasn't garbled like Kenny's), and apparently got killed by a bear. Despite this she appears in future episodes unharmed.
Patty Nelson will pop up againThey had no problem bringing back Karen despite her not appearing for years. A future episode will delve into Cartman's crush on her.
South Park Studios will eventually start doing commercials for Dr. Pepper.Bart Simpson wouldn't let anyone lay a finger on his Butterfinger, and Brian and Stewie can't seem to agree on how to pronounce "Wheat Thins". Since the product is already all over the show itself, advertisements wouldn't be that big a leap. And just imagine the killing Coca Cola corp. could make plastering the show's characters all over their packaging.
Kenny's body must be decomposed for him to be rebornThis explains the rats that usually show up to eat him. Also why he takes longer to be reborn in episodes where his body is preserved for some amount of time (like Sexual Healing). Because, how weird would it be for there to be over 50 Kenny corpses littered around the town?
The "amnesia effect" that Kenny dying causes is actually increasing with every death.Hence why early episodes seem to contradict the whole "not knowing Kenny dies" thing. Each time Kenny dies, he accesses his more Humanoid Abomination traits more and more, generating a stronger psychic effect. The growing amnesia is likely a self defense mechanism from people to protect their minds from the Spawn of an Old One-that, and the fact that someone can die and come back with seemingly no explanation would strain the senses. Symptoms would start with being somewhat apathetic(even in his first appearance, their reactions to his death were rather blase), to only able to vaguely recall Kenny dying("you didn't die this time Kenny"), until they outright repress all memory(Mysterion Rises). Eventually people will start to forget Kenny dying while he's dying, if not start to go mad. Cartman could recall Kenny's death not just because he drank his ashes/shares one of his eyes, but because he's already mentally unstable, meaning the spawn of an Old One wouldn't jar him that much.
Oh my god! They killed Saddam!We have seen Saddam Hussein die at least two times throughout South Park's run, with one more reference to his death at the start of his movie (namely, he was killed by a huge cloud of flatulence, by a pack of wild boars and thrown back to Hell where he got impaled by a stalagmite). Through this, the cause of Saddam's death wouldn't be conflicting. Saddam would be in a similar situation as Kenny in the South Park universe, where he can't die and he keeps popping back up.
South Park is in a time warp.The series started during the Clinton administration, spanned the entire Bush administration, and into the Obama administration, yet somehow only two years have passed within South Park. Time passes differently in South Park, much slower than in the outside world.
Kenny can control when he comes back to life.While Immortality Hurts, Kenny generally just wants to live his life, so he will come back as soon as possible. The reason why he stayed dead for so long was because of how his friends were reacting-Kenny was so enthralled that his friends were actually concerned for him and were mourning him that he wanted them to remember as long as possible that he can't truly die.
The Stick of Truth will have a pack based on Jesus Vs. FrostyIt will revolve around the appearance of your character, leading to comments like, "What the hell's wrong with your eyes?" and "I thought only adults have noses."
Karen is immortal just like KennyI'm combining this with the "the longer it takes Kenny to die, the longer it takes to bring him back" theory. His little sister Karen has the same "curse" as him, but has only had one offscreen death, and doesn't remember it. This is why we don't see her for long periods of time. Or maybe it takes a while to gain the ability to remember deaths, so Kenny remembers because he has died so many times, but Karen just thinks it's a bad dream or false memory. OR Kenny and Karen know about this, and this is another reason why Kenny dubs the Mysterion "guardian angel" disguise, so that Karen feels like she has someone to relate to.
Eric Cartman was rather ill as baby/toddlerHe's a spoiled brat because Liane is afraid to discipline him because well... do you want the last thing you said to someone before they died to be a scolding?
KENNY was sexually abused...Mainly based on the fact that's he rather precocious when it comes to sexual terms.
They will do an episode that mocks the shipping community.It's rather odd that South Park of all shows is a haven for the shipping community, especially the Slash Fic sub-genre. I can imagine the writers doing an episode which mocks this by having the girls ship characters and write fanfiction in-universe, and the main characters reacting to the many ships. Bonus points if they have women try to ship them and be portrayed as pedophiles, considering how they're shipping under-age characters.
All of the events of South Park are taken in Stan’s perspective, and are actually a figment of his imagination.The series isn’t taken place in his steps as we see him on the screen, but rather still happen because of his perspective. Even the intro for seasons 1-5 and 12-onwards show that the show is meant to take place in the way Stan sees it. Before the series, Stan spent the day with Jimbo and Ned and they gave him a bottle of whisky. Out of innocence and naivety Stan tried the whisky, and ending up getting drunk which resulted in fascinating illusions that interested him. In the beginning of the series, he kept secretly stealing his father’s whisky to continue seeing these illusions. By season five, he started to use the whisky as coping mechanism for the depression he felt after Kenny died, as a way to repress it and hope that Kenny can return again. By the time Stan turned ten, he made a pledge that he would stop drinking and become a better person. But by doing so, he failed to realize how severe his depression had become because he had never went for therapy, and his parents never suggested it to him. When he was introduced to the alcohol again, it offered a major boost of endorphins, but he realized he was hurting his best friend and found that to be unbearable, turning away from the alcohol just like he tried for his tenth birthday. Now Stan uses the whisky to deal with the annoyance of everybody (except his best friend) along with repressing his depression and insanity. Rather than being the Only Sane Man, Stan is the only character in the entire series who represses his insanity, which is at intensity worse than Eric Cartman. Randy uses alcohol in a similar case where he has become entirely bored with life and believes that being drunk is the only thing that keeps him entertained. Grandpa Marsh uses alcohol as a way to possibly remember happy memories, but to no avail. The only members of the Marsh family who don’t drink are Sharon and Shelley. Shelley already sees the world as shit, but she hates her family and avoids alcohol so she does not become them. Sharon has a less severe case of depression, but it has caused her to be unable to deal with change which is the only reason why she’s still married to Randy.
In "The Jeffersons" Cartman saw Michael Jackson/Jefferson as a father figureCartman cries himself to sleep at night because he doesn't have a dad. He wouldn't know what a good father was because he doesn't care about his friends' dads, so Michael Jackson's ways of connecting to children make Eric think that he would be a fun father. An alternative is that, on the outside, he thinks he just wants an adult friend (like in the NAMBLA episode) but his subconscious is aware of his need for a dad and will attach to anyone it thinks fits that role.
The kickstart of Imaginationland gives us a message.
Veronica Crabtree is Shelly Marsh from the future.Crabtree is miserable all the time and has No Indoor Voice. She yells at everyone and threatens people to keep them in line. Shelly threatens people as well and nearly yells as much as Crabtree while being miserable.
An episode in the next season will be based around Grumpy Cat
Saddam Hussein was behind Tooth Decay taking the Canadian Princess.He also hoped the Canadians would be too preoccupied with Scott the Dick, who was told that the Inuit's took the Princess, to think of tooth decay doing it. If tooth decay succeeded, then Saddam Hussein not only could use it to take over Canada, but maybe even the whole world! And he would have gotten away with it, if the Inuit's didn't know about the Princess's horrible mouth condition.
Kenny's immortality has something to do with the series' Comic Book Time.And the Laser-Guided Amnesia has something to do with the fact that nobody questions why only 2 years have passed after 3 Presidential Administrations and about seven or eight Christmases.
Butter's parents abuse Butters because they're paranoid.Notice how whenever something happens to Butters or some general problem occurs in South Park, Randy and Linda Stotch always go to the worst conclusion. While this could just be Rule of Funny("There's nothing to fear, except for Super AIDS"), it could also be a sign of paranoia. Butter's parents are actually incredibly paranoid, thinking that the outside world is always trying to get you. This is the reason they punish Butters for relatively minor offences-to them, you have to follow a set rule to keep yourself safe, and Butters having all these crazy adventures result in "being raped and sodomized." The crueller emotional abuse comes from another element of their psychosis-overreaction to everything, which worsens their paranoia. Linda is the most obvious, considering how her response to Randy cheating on her at a gay parlour was to go nuts and try to kill Butters.
At the end of Crack Baby Athletic Association Slash wasn't the one who paid the crack baby houseThere was only one person who knew about Kyle's plans to create the house for the crack babies. As out of character as this sounds for him, I think it was Cartman that made the donation. First of all, in the scene where they lose their money, the only one complaining about the losses is Kyle. Cartman, who would usually be the first to complain about getting gypped, instead complained about the fact that Slash wasn't real. So that could mean that he had secretly stashed a lot more money somewhere (this is Cartman after all) and for once in his life decided to use it for a good intention. Alternatively, he already paid for it, but was still annoyed about Slash being a fraud that it didn't sink in how much money he lost. Once he did realize it, though, he decided to put the guitar in the corner to make it seem like Slash was the donor. Not out of humbleness, though, he was probably embarrassed by how much he lost and decided to put the full blame on the fraud.
Cthulhu mistook Cartman for one of his kind.Consider Cartman from Cthulhu's perspective: you're as old as the stars and just as alien. You can kill a biosphere with ease. To you, we're microbes. Then suddenly one of these Puny Earthlings not only comes up to you while remaining sane, but demands your help. Since most people know to run the fuck away from something like Cthulhu unless they're THAT badass, the leader of the Star Spawn thought that Cartman wasn't human-he just looks like one. This is why Cartman was capable of befriend Cthulhu instead of the Old One ignoring him/swatting Cartman like a bug. Now who did Cthulhu mistake Cartman for? The only member of the Cthulhu mythos who not cares what people do, but manipulates them with impunity: Nyarlathotep.
Religious figures in South Park aren't inherently divine, though religion can give them divinity.The universe of South Park has shown to not fit with religious creation stories: if Earth is an alien reality TV show, what is God supposed to be here? Remember the "Blainetology" episode, where the Super-Best friends feared that Blaine would gain enough followers to become one of them. This is because the same applies to the Super-Best friends. Humanity in South Park was capable of making an entire reality from their imagination, but religious figures like Jesus, Buddha, ect were so venerated and idolized that they became real people. The same goes for well-known mythological locations, like Heaven and Hell. Notice how Jesus doesn't seem like the badass messiah we love when people lose interest in him, such as said "Blainetology" episode and when people started betting on Satan. These religious figures are real enough to not simply have their personalities predetermined by cultural perceptions: God is really weird looking because He was sick of conforming to the stereotype and Satan thought that Being Evil Sucks. The only real god who's appeared on South Park? It's Cthulhu.
Cartman can remember some of Kenny's death because of his connection to Cthulhu.Either retroactively by Reality Warping, or because Cartman had some pre-existing connection that would let him make friends with Cthulhu, but either way, Cartman mentions in Cartmanland that Kenny dies all the time, so he is able to remember, at least some times. How? Kenny's immortality is tied to Cthulhu, so if Cartman can have some connection too, he can bypass Kenny's death obliviousness.
In the Series Finale, everyone except Kenny will die.
Canadian celebrities appear American because they're wealthy.Most of the Canadians that appear are rich in American money, James Cameron for example. Because they have lots of American money, they appear American.
Kenny will become a real superhero.Sure, his body is normal. But look at it this way - he can practice all that awesome Batman shiznit to the extreme without worrying about dying. And he's used to pain - not numb, but he knows agony. All he needs is a Mentor to teach him Kick-boxing or something suitable.
Predictions for future Call Back episodes simaler to 200
Predictions for the finale of the Black Friday saga
Kyle's anime version in Good Times With Weapons is his idealized versionStan and Kenny both have blue eyes, which they have in canon. Kyle has brown eyes but straight black hair. His eyes are probably accurate but Kyle has been shown to hate his curly hair so he probably wishes it was straight. It's unknown if he dislikes that his hair is red too though.
The Kids in the Future
Kim Kardashian (in the South Park universe) has the same power as Kenny.A crazed gunman killed her at the end of "The Tale of Scrotie Mc Boogerballs". She was mentioned several times in "The Hobbit", but as someone living, with no memory that she had once died- just like Kenny. Continuity applies to Kanye West, who refers to himself as a "recovering gay fish" in the episode, but not to her unless she's in a Kenny-like loop perhaps related to her status as a hobbit.
Cartman is the reincarnation of Adolf Hitler.On top of his hatred of the Jews, hippies, and gingers. He's dressed up as Hitler at least twice, once was trying to create a group of Neo Nazis under the guise of a Mel Gibson Fan Club.