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Téa ships Harry/Hedwig, by the way.
Also, the image of Agent Smith slithering up and down Patrick Stewart's body, snake-style, is one that will haunt us until the end of our days, thanks so much.
Like if Hulk were dating Peppermint Patty!
Shipping beyond all bounds of sanity. There are official couples and there are couples drawn from more-or-less subjective subtext, and then there are these. Characters who are shipped together despite barely even having a relationship in canon. Sometimes they haven't even met in canon. Sometimes they don't even belong to the same 'verse (that's what cross overs are for, after all) or to the same species.
Crack pairings range from the making-you-scratch-your-head-in-puzzlement weird, to the eyes-gouging-with-a-fork-inducing weird. But they always leave you asking "Why? By all that is holy, WHY?"
Reasons for writing crack pairing fan works varies. It might be in order to clean up romantic loose ends by bringing together characters left alone, or to erase the memory of a particularly squicky canon pairing. They might be the result of people genuinely searching for a good personality match, or drawing parallels between two characters for whatever reason. A good number are the results of freeform roleplaying games. Or maybe they did it on a dare. Most often, though, the insanity itself is its own justification, especially to poke fun at more hardcore fans.
Occasionally, when a fanfic writer gets hold of a crack pairing and makes it convincing enough, that ship gains a following and can even become very popular. It's even been known to influence the Powers That Be.
While crack pairings may show up in crack fics, the two are not necessarily related. A Crack Pairing could very well be treated in a dead serious and realistic way, and a Crack Fic could be gen, or only about traditional pairings.
Note that when characters do have some kind of relationship, no matter how unhealthy, insane or weird their pairing would be, it doesn't count as crack pairing. Contrast with Ho Yay, Foe Yay, No Yay, Twincest and Brother Sister Incest for examples of ships which you may find weird but which are not crack pairings...
For an entire LJ community dedicated to particularly squicky crack pairings, behold VeryWrongSlash , which needs no further explanation.
If one wants to create his/her own Crack pairing (or just wants to see some pairings that may not yet have been added to this page), use the Brain-Hurting Pairer Generator.
See Crossover Ship for shipping characters who don't belong to the same verse. See Cargo Ship for shipping objects. Post some of the crazier ships you've thought up/written in Crack Pairing. Compare with Ships That Pass In The Night.
Examples:
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Advertising
- There's Mac/PC slash out there. Yes, from the Apple commercials. You know what, after reading the rest of this page it seems positively normal.
- US variant, or UK? Mitchell and Webb is one thing, but if John Hodgman's involved...
- Since you asked, it's John Hodgman and Justin Long having sex, except they have computer ports and plugs instead of human orifices. Aren't you sad you asked now?
- I thought you meant the actual computers. But that would be Cargo Ship anyway.
- Played for laughs here (scroll down).
- Flo (bubbly Progressive Insurance checkout lady) and Erin (Esurance super-agent.) It's destiny.
- Throw in the Allstate guy (Dennis Haysbert) for a Insuriffic 3-way!
- Take him out, and I'll be just fine.
- Epic Win
Anime and Manga
- Shippo/Koga (Shoga?) from Inu-Yasha.
- Perhaps one of the most popular Crack Pairings is Eriol/Tomoyo in the Card Captor Sakura fandom. Despite having barely any interaction in Canon, the canonical love they have for other characters, and Eriol being chronologically at least 30 years old and mentally much older when Tomoyo is a regular 12-year-old girl, the pairing has such a huge following that it gets mistaken for canon by underinformed fans.
- Tomoyo/Meiling is common, but if you take the second movie in consideration, it's almost canon.
- Naruto - Maybe it comes from similar appearances and personality, maybe it's a backlash to militant Naruto/Sasuke, Naruto/Hinata, Sasuke/Sakura, and Naruto/Sakura fans, or maybe people would've been shipping them if Hinata had not been in the picture. A growing segment of fans like the idea of Naruto hooking up with Ino. Their interaction in canon is limited to the filler episodes, including the one that ended with him peeing off the side of a roof while disguised as her. Its growing popularity has turned it more into an alternative pairing than crack.
- "Initial Offensive" and "An Unforeseen Consquence" are two of the better examples of this. Though the first delves a little too deeply into the sexual side of things and the latter starts with Ino's lifeless body plunging into a dumpster.
- This can also be expanded to Naruto/Any female character. Naruto/Tayuya for instance? (You should see how many reviews those stories get on Fanfiction.net...))
- Hell, one of those made its way to the Fanfic Rec page here even.
- Ino/Pillow. No, seriously.
- With recent manga chapters, we now have Crow/Naruto. No, I don't mean Kankuro's puppet I mean actual crows.
- Sasori/Moegi is a fan favorite.
- Does Gaara/Rock Lee count?
- How often does Pakkun get to see some action?
- Sasu Gaa ftw!
- Konoha ninja/Akatsuki pairings are common crack pairings, especially Sakura/Sasori.
- Pain/nail/Kakashi has been played for laughs, but...
- Shikamaru/Hinata. Well she is not very troublesome and it's cute.
- Anko and Gai. Orochimaru in Kabuto's body could show up to give Anko away (completely ignoring that she wants to rend him limb from limb and poke him with many, many pointy things before dumping him in a vat of slightly diluted acid). Before Sasuke kicked his scaly rear, he could've been the flower girl. Then there's the fishnet and green spandex wedding dress...
- SAI/KARIN FOR THE WIN! THEY SHALL TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
- Kakashi/Sakura is mostly crack. But this ship has the best smut out there.
- Damn straight.
- See the House of Crows for low-calorie, low-smut (So far...) variation.
- Don't forget the incest. Well, let's see... Gaara/Temari, Gaara/Kankuro, Kankuro/Temari, Naruto/4th Hokage(his father), Hinata/Hanabi (her sister), lots and lots of Sasuke/Itachi and Neji/Hinata (for many fans they're not crack, apparently), Madara/Itachi, Madara/Sasuke (not to mention that Madara is probably their grandfather or something), Hiashi/Hizashi (Hinata and Neji's twin fathers) and probably more.
- Naruto/Kyuubi? Naruto/Naruto clone? Kiba/Akamaru? Sakura/Chiyo?
- For one horrific moment, this troper thought you meant... THAT Chiyo. From [[Azumanga Daioh]]. Bad bad thoughts.
- And there's Lee/Gai-sensei, but this pairing has support even in canon... If people can see it.
- Hinata/all Akatsuki members at the same time. Sakura/Akatsuki, too.
- Zetsu/ his flower.
- White Zetsu/Black Zetsu is a possibility in light of the fact that the two halves can talk to each other and can even separate.
- Sasu/Kishi. Kishi as in Kishimoto. And it so needs more love!
- Haku/Sai.
- Sasuke/Hinata is so popular that it's barely considered crack anymore. Also, since Konan is the only woman in Akatsuki...
- After recent events, there is now a three-way between Killer Bee/Kisame/Samehada. Illustrated here in this comic. Not Safe For Sanity.
- Naruto/Karui won a few fans after she beat the crap out of him. And Shikamaru/Sakura has a following based on their intelligence and decent amount of interaction.
- Shino with just about anyone, including Ino, Tenten, Kiba, Kurenai, Anko, Chouji, Hanabi, Neji... He just never gets a break!
- Hinata is sometimes paired with Kou, a branch house member who is assigned to protect her during Pain's invasion of Konoha.
- Okay, let's declare the Naruto shipping fandom as the Most Triumphant Example in Crack Pairings.
- The Harry Potter fans would like to have a word with you. (Look down.)
- Neon Genesis Evangelion has Rei/Asuka...
- Anytime anyone is ever shipped with an EVA or an an angel.
- Does that include Gendo/EVA 1? Because that's sorta canon.
- How about Shinji/Hikari? Even though she's got a crush on Touji and barely speaks with Shinji, some fans see her as just what Shinji might need—probably because she's one of the few characters not emotionally damaged.
- Kaworu/Asuka is pretty common between fans, despite their, uh... complete lack of interaction. After all, Kaworu was a replacement for her to pilot the 02, and she was too deep in her Heroic BSOD to ever see him. Shinji And Warhammer40k, being For Want Of A Nail Alternate Universe Fic, actually makes this one work.
- With the Rebuild of Evangelion remake movie tetralogy, there's shipping between Kensuke and
Mayumi Mari, since they would be the only ones that would end up alone, somehow or another.
- Although Shinji/Asuka does not fit the above description of a "crack pairing", a recent survey of S/A shippers found that 86% of them were on crack. The remaining 14% were on LSD.
- Rei/Kaworu is considered this, although its more of pairing spares and night passing. People seem to think this is somehow more squicky than Shinji/Rei... even though Shinji and Rei are half-siblings.
- They're even worse than half-siblings; she's the clone of his mother.
- Only a half-clone. The other half is from Lilith's DNA. Genetically that equals half-sibling, with the other parent being a nonhuman.
- Speaking of Ships That Pass In The Night: Rei/Rei. How you ask? Instrumentality. Or Rei/Rei/Rei. (sure Rei I is about five years old, but Rei III is only a month or two fresh out of the reiqarium, and Rei II is ten at most, so any ships involving Rei are inherently squicky) They're just so... dynamic together.
- From Suzumiya Haruhi, there's the curiously semi-popular Kyon/Asakura pairing◊. Asakura (a humanoid interface like Nagato) is deleted partway through the first novel, you see, after trying to kill Kyon to provoke a reaction in Haruhi. It gets better. In The Disappearance Of Haruhi Suzumiya, Kyon winds up in an Alternate Universe where everything is "normal" and winds up getting stabbed by her again near the end, this time for trying to return the world to the way it was ("That was the reason why I was created."). Yandere-fandom, anyone?
- Some re-imaginings of the first incident involve her trying a different tactic, If You Know What I Mean. Haruhi nearly remade the world for catching Asahina playfully pushing against Kyon's back; one can hardly imagine what might happen if she caught him doing something more. It is the obvious, sane choice and likely the one she would've made if she'd only thought of it. You can easily imagine Kyon talking her into it out of self-preservation.
- Asakura/Nagato is also fairly popular, and in fact semi-implied in Disappearance.
- Mai-HiME/Mai-Otome fandom has the odd pairing of Nao/Tomoe. One half's an Anti Hero, the other a Psycho Lesbian. Total interaction between the two characters? Zero. In fact, Nao seems to be a popular target for crack pairings in general, given her aloof nature.
- There is an amount of fanart supporting a Nao/Natsuki/Shizuru threesome in the Mai-Hime timeline, specifically the manga. Seems cute and odd, but not crack until you consider this is Nao involving herself in a threesome with the girl she's always disliked/hated and the other girl who killed her mother before Mashiro resurrected everyone. True, everyone seems to be getting along better in the epilogue, but really...
- Sir Jeremiah Gottwald/Sayoko Shinozaki has lately become kinda popular in the Code Geass fandom. The pretty fanarts also help. It's "A FUCKING STORM OF LOYALTY".
- Fanon is quite clear on how the Grand Finale plays out: Only Anya and Orange are shown in the ORANGE GROVE because of the "fact" that Sayoko is back at the house cooking for her dear husband and their adopted daughter. Or scaring off thieves and birds eating/stealing the fruits with her l33t Ninja Maid skillz and then joining her little family at home for a nice dinner.
- NinaXTable-kun OTP. It even has some basis in canon
- Table-kun/Lelouch's Hat/Kanon's Hat. It's out there. Somewhere.
- found it unfortunatly I didn't find one that also had Kanon's hat.
- The Pokemon fandom made a sport of it, with Loads And Loads Of Characters and fewer canon ships than you can count on one hand. Fans would spend plenty of time thinking up interesting pairings, giving them clever names, and adding them to a large list. ElderShipping (Ash's Mom/Professor Oak) was probably the most popular, until one wondered if they were hitting on each other in canon. And these ships were not just for humans - Pokemon were used frequently, too. At one point, there was even a subsection for shippings with inanimate objects.
- The inanimate object thing makes perfect sense. After all, who HASN'T been inside of Master Ball?
- One fanfiction involved Pikachu getting intimate with a ketchup bottle.
- And let's not even get into Hot Skitty On Wailord Action...
- There is a page with an insanely long list of Pokemon ships. View it at your own risk!
- Pikachu and Pokeball's past is so complicated he won't get into her. Pokeball asks herself what have she done, and Pikachu, in Pika-language, says that she's so overbearing, and suffocates him so much that he just went away. Or something.
- This one doesn't make ANY sense at all: Disguise De Limit Shipping (Paulx Duplica)
- Doppelganger Shipping - Ashx Ashley. Just think this over and you'll realize why.
- Digimon Adventure has a few memetic crack pairings. Takeru/Holsmon and Iori/BlackWarGreymon come to mind. A very popular crack pairing in the early days of the fandom was Yamato/Mimi (Mimato). Despite their both liking music and occasionally standing next to each other, they have never had an on-screen conversation. Ever since the second season dropped their love-bombs, however, Digimon fans have enjoyed writing crack pairings and seeing how many they can make work.
- Hey, there was damn good evidence for Iori/BlackWarGreymon! And Mimato was largely born out of the need to pair the most beautiful characters of each gender.
- Most ships within the Jo Jos Bizarre Adventure fandom would undoubtedly qualify. Most pairings consist of slash, incest, Foe Yay, or any combination of these. It doesn't stop there either. There are pairings like Iggy/Polnareff and Dio/Steamroller.
- Giorno/Jolyne, who not only have never met in canon, but are also blood related.
- Sailor Moon has many of these. Generally anything involving Sailor Pluto while questioning the paternity of Chibiusa will have you reaching for the Brain Bleach. There's also Minako/Rei, which is based on a manga chapter in which Minako asks Rei if she farts.
- Minako/Rei is not that farfetched. Here is a whole manifesto about it.
- If you also include the Live Action series then you have plenty of Sub Text to go around. It was very blantant.
- There are only something like five canon relationships. This doesn't stop the fanbase from shipping everyone with everyone else—incest, pedophilia, necrophilia (Saturn and enemies) included.
- Yu-Gi-Oh is the shonen form of Sailor Moon in twisted ships. There's the so-called "Hikari/Yami" pairing. A frequent ship is Kaiba/Shizuka (Serenity), based on one line that Kaiba may or may not have said to Shizuka. This when Kaiba doesn't even know who Shizuka is; even if he weren't already in love with a card, he'd reject her on principle for being Jonouchi/Joey's sister, someone who he can't stand (Then again...). But probably hands down the weirdest pairing is Asuka/Judai's TOWEL. (A towel he wore in the Hot Springs Episode). It's become a bit of a running gag.
- Saiou/Mizuki is real even if no one sees it.
- Kaiba/Shizuka may also be based on the fact that some people think that Shizuka is the reincarnation of his card girlfriend because they kinda look alike. And then there's Kaiba/Yami.
- Kaiba/Shizuka is probably based largely on the fact that Kaiba's canon love is dead, and his limited interactions with Shizuka means she's one of the only girls in the series he doesn't explicitly dislike. And you have to pair him with someone, because he's so darn sexy.
- To clarify, some people support Kaiba/Shizuka because of one scene in the Battle Ship arc, when Kaiba seemed to agree to get treatment for Bakura after Shizuka begged him to do so (which they believed caused him to change his mind because she spoke up, while he was previously unwilling to accept the others' requests).
- Asuka/Judai's towel? There's a fic of Judai/his towel!
- Most random pairings in Yu Gi Oh exist. There's everything from Yami Bakura/Mokuba to Otogi/Isis.
- Don't forget that Yu Gi Oh The Abridged Series gives us Yami Bakura/Zorc.
- You can view most of the ships here
- Watari/L in Death Note.
- That's nothing. There is Gevanni/Near doujinshi. And Misa/Takada. *shudder*
- You thing Misa/Takada is bad? Try Misa/Sayu (Light's Sister), or Sayu/Mello.
- I see your Watari/L, and raise you Watari/Soichiro.
- I can top that. L/Sachiko Yagami (Light's mother), and it was pretty damn convincing.
- Ryuk/Apple, and Light/Death Note. Probably the most canon ships Death Note will ever get.
- L/Beyond Birthday, L/Near, L/Mello, Matt/Near.
- Matsuda/Matt.
- Light/Mikami
- Mello/Light, Misa/Mikami,BB/Light, BB/Near, Naomi/Light
- Misa/Ryuk. Matsuda/Rem. In fact, human/shinigami in general.
- Except for Misa/Rem. That's canon.
- In addition, Matt/Misa
- I have ya'll topped. There's an entire website (in Japanese, natch) dedicated to the pairing of Soichiro/Mello.
- Light/Potato Chips. That is all.
- Nope. Ryuk/Light. THAT is all.
- Don't forget about Ryuk/Rem.
- Bleach has the Orihime/Ulquiorra ship. It's hard to tell whether some of the works are jokes or serious, as some reinterpret some of their scenes through the lens of shipping the two; for example, having Ulquiorra apologize for his callous talk about Chad's apparent death after Orihime's Armor Piercing Slap.
- There is more canon evidence for this ship than for some others... Ulquiorra spending his last moments asking Orihime if she's afraid of him and trying to touch her hand when she says no and forgives him takes this into plain ol' Subtext.
- Orihime/Ulquiorra is just the tip of a very large iceberg. A quick search on ff.net reveals that Orihime appears to attract this trope, with various stories pairing her with Ulquiorra, Grimmjow, Ulquiorra and Grimmjow (greedy fangirls), Renji, Ishida, Hollow Ichigo (usually disturbing), Byakuya, Starrk (suprisingly cute), Hisagi, Kensei, and Tatsuki, amongst many others.
- There's a small following for Ichigo/Tatsuki. It makes some sense.
- At least it's not Chad/Tatsuki. Or Lisa/Uryuu (It gets squickier by the fact that there's a moderate chance that she could be his mother)...
- There is a Zaraki/Nanao fic (the author said herself it was crack). The weird thing? It was good.
- Zaraki x Unohana for Opposites Attract turned Up To Eleven. Though if Unohana really is as strong as it is hinted, it could at least lead to Zaraki getting interested in her.
- Zaraki/Soifon. Foreplay would probably involve her pinning him to the wall with her sword.
- Karin x Keigo seems to have a slight support, as well as Tatsuki x Renji.
- There is one fic which has Chad/The Reader of the fic.
- What a shame it doesn't include a threesome with Uryuu...
- Aizen/Kyoka Suigetsu. That is all.
- Fullmetal Alchemist: Hawkeye X Original!Greed, a rare pairing. Think about it!
- Is the fact that the most ubiquitous pairing in fanfic and doujinshi is Roy/Ed not enough? Admittedly it's much more popular with fans of the first anime, where it's slightly more justified with the amped up amount of Ho Yay, but the squick and presumable ilegality are still there. Either way, Ed gets paired with anyone and everyone, so when it comes to crack pairings there's a lot to choose from.
- People also love pairing Roy with Hughes, despite both of them having canon (straight) love interests. It's particularly puzzling in Hughes' case, since being affectionate towards his wife and daughter in a ridiculously over-the-top manner is a defining trait of his character.
- Manga-continuity fans have a liking for Ed/Ling. There's little to none canon Ho Yay subtext, but at least they're the same age.
- There's also small amounts of Riza/Edward, despite the fact they don't talk much in the manga.
- Almost anything from Rozen Maiden.
- Jun/Shinku's armpit. Yes, he removes her arm from its socket and... you can guess the rest.
- Enju x Rozen is rather popular, but Rozen was once portrayed as a Japanese version of Bob Ross. Here, Brain Bleach for you, too.
- Satoshi/Keiichi from Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni. They never meet. Not once. Even by the end, only three people know the truth about him, and not one of those people is Keiichi. That doesn't stop Slashers from coming up with reasons they are madly in love with each other...
- A few more Crack Pairings: Oishi/Takano, Irie/Takano, Irie/Satoko (nevermind it's been toyed with), Irie/Rika (same logic), Satoshi/Oryou (ew.), Shion/Kasai, Rena/her cleaver/
Kenta-kun Colonel Sanders, Keiichi/baseball bat to name a few.
- This troper has seen Oishi/Keiichi before as well.
- "My Jersey Boy." Carl from ATHF and Inu Yasha. Yeah.
- BanditKeithXAmericaXStephen Colbert fanart.
- This seriously is screaming for a link.
- Marisa stole Suigintou's precious thing.
- Gunsmith Cats has possibly the first canon crack pairing ever with the latest volume of Gunsmith Cats Burst having Misty and Iron Goldie Musou end up together by the end. In a threesome with the maid, no less.
- There exists a niche fanbase amongst watchers of Gundam Seed Destiny that ship Shinn and Cagalli together, citing that their personalities would have meshed very well if he hadn't blamed Orb for his family's death.
- Thanks to the fact that the characters are all countries even the canon pairings in Axis Powers Hetalia could qualify as crack. Then read the history of each nation and it's not too hard to come up with some reason for a romantic pairing for each and every single pairing.
- How about some Interspecies Romance between Tony and Lithuania?
- There's at least one fanart and more than one fic for Canada/Ukraine, and it makes a fair amount of sense when you take their personalities into account.
- How 'bout England/Mochimerica? It has been done, in accordance with Rule Thirty Four. And then there's China/Shinatty-chan. And that's not even bringing in historical or political figures. Barack Obama/America, Ted Kennedy/America, and Queen Elisabeth/England have been spotted mutiple times in the english-speaking fandom. Then there's Old Fritz(Friedrich II)/Prussia Jeanne D'Arc/France and Maria Theresa/Austria.
- There's also some "Diva"/Riku. Diva/Riku is canon, but it's rape, Riku's scared to death of her, and Diva's just batshit psycho. Fix Fic usually has her decide for him to be a plaything, which isn't that much of a stretch.
- In the Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle Italian fandom, Shaoron/Yuui (the twin brothers of two of the protagonists in the Alternate Universe omakes) started out as this. Then the pairing caught on (with the help of some very willing fanwriters and pretty Japanese fanart◊), and it's now considered on par with the series' main ships- in Italy, of course. We are waiting for the right time to export it and conquer the world.
- It's catching on, in some corners of the English speaking fandom, at least. This troper has seen it done multiple times.
- Some people pair Viral and Kiyal, from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. There are people who pair Leeron and Rossiu, and it's squicky as hell. Unless it's played for laughs, but with an adult Rossiu.
- Azumanga Daioh has the obvious TomoxYomi, KaorinxSakaki, YukarixNyamo and Kagura/Sakaki, but also ChiyoxOsaka, YomixOsaka, SakakixOsaka, KaorinxOsaka, ChiyoxSakaki, TomoxSakaki] and [=NyamoxChiyo. That last one was R-rated.
- What's sad is that the Chiyo-Sakaki pairing is one of the more logical of these.
- Notably averted by the Love Hina community, where despite the majority of the female cast being canonically in love with Keitaro, 90% of fanfics ship the canon pair.
- An entry for a Gundam Wing "Craziest Crack Pairing Lemon" contest was RelenaxRashid. You may now break out the Brain Bleach.
- Most of the popular Mahou Sensei Negima pairings are fairly rational (Negi/Asuna, Negi/Nodoka, Negi/Yue, Negi/Nodoka/Yue, Konoka/Setsuna), but here exist some odd ones (Negi/Evangeline, Chisame/Asakura, and Chisame/Chachamaru). Then you get to the crack: Natsumi/Leek and Chamo/Chachazero. The most crack-y thing about that last one is that it could quite easily be argued as canon.
- Tenchi Muyo. True, it's centred on a Love Dodecahedron and named the Tenchi Solution, but there's the fact that the only ones I know of that he hasn't dated were Yosho/Katsuhito (grandfather), Nobuyuki (father), and Azusa (great-grandfather). This includes a little Cargo Ship one that I saw that paired him with Azaka and Kamidake. Tenchi/Ryo-Ohki is almost canon in comparison (and in some continuities too).
- Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha. Most ships are fairly understandable due all the befriending that goes around in both the standard sense and the memetic sense, but then there are those that make more ordinary shippers give pause. For example, there exists Fan Art of Vivio/Hayate, which simply boggles the mind since, not only do the two barely share a word with each other, Hayate's more than twice Vivio's age.
- This Troper found one fic shipping Fate/Hitler.
- This troper is shocked that Ranma 1/2 has yet to be mentioned here. Every single character has been paired with everyone. Everyone. Two popular ones are Ryoga/Ukyo, which is based entirely on one episode and they rarely interact otherwise, and Male Ranma/Female Ranma, which is just wrong.
Comic Books
Film
- One might consider any pairing in the surprisingly large slash portion of the Tranformers fandom to be crack. However, Sam/Bumblebee in the 2007 movie continuity is popular enough to have a livejournal comm.
- Captain Jack Sparrow and the jar of dirt he had in the second movie. There is at least one story with this pairing in Fanfiction.Net's Pirates Of The Caribbean section.
- Jorge Posada and his dirt.
- "...and guess what's inside it!"
- There are people, who are serious about that Will/Davy Jones is the OTP
- Indiana Jones/Sallah, set during Raiders of the Lost Ark.
- A popular crack pairing in the The Incredibles fandom is Synlet (Syndrome/Violet), also called Vidrome. Despite absolutely no canon evidence, it's extremely popular because the writers believe that they have similar personalities.
- From Star Wars: General Grievous/Shaak Ti, a pairing whose only justification is... that Shaak Ti wasn't killed by him. Twice, admittedly, but talk about Slap Slap Kiss...
- There's also a writer who's written a lot of Mace/Qui-Gon and some Jaina/Mirta (Boba Fett's granddaughter) among other cracky pairings.
- Jaina/Mirta is not that crack - after all, they are actually, you know, friends by the end of LOTF.
- Boba Fett/Dengar, but it was written as humor.
- What about Luke/Han? That's not including the Expanded Universe fanfics, which have the Solo kids in all possible combinations, in addition to Jacen/Ben. Moving out of the incest world (it wouldn't be Star Wars without incest, now would it?), the Skywalkers apparently swing with the Horns in all sorts of ways, so you'll see Luke/Mirax, Corran/Mara, Luke/Corran, and Mara/Mirax. But the strangest, by far, is Luke/Kyp, the primary subtext being that Mara doesn't like Kyp, and your typical Yaoi Fangirl bashes the inconvenient chicks.
- Marakin. Also Tahiri/Ben, which is canon, but in the fanfic version, he probably agreed to it. Apparently in fanfic world, Skywalker men take after Anakin, only far more.
- My personal favorite is Ben/Vestara. She's barely been mentioned, and there has been no real evidence of a romantic or even Foe Yay pairing with Ben, except they both have their personal angst. (Ves for being scarred in a society that emphasizes physical perfection, Ben for every single word in LOTF.)
- The Dread Pirate Roberts and Robin Hood. Cary Elwes can apparently go screw himself.
- This troper knows people who ship Dug/Kevin.
- "Oh PLEASE be my prisoner, PLEASE ..." Oh god ...
- Landa/Shosanna.
Literature
Live Action TV
- Heroes crackships range from the ridiculous to the truly disturbing, and include: Bobhinder (Bob/Mohinder); Chylar (Chandra/Sylar); Chailar (Chai/Sylar); Lyle/West; Lyle/Zach; West/Zach; Moluggles (Mohinder Lizard/Mister Muggles); Mandra (Mohinder/Chandra)(yes, this is the latter); Chandra/Eden; Chandra/HRG and Chandra/Monty. Yes, Monty. Apparently this is because of the portmanteau name "Chonty". Poor Chandra has gained a posthumous reputation as a pervy old man. Also, there are rumours of a Lyle/Sylar fic out there somewhere... (Here it is). There's also Luke/Lyle. Perhaps there's Micah/Wireless.
- The scary thing is you could support that from the canon material. The two were chatting with each other after Hana "Died" and apparently were close enough for Micah to confide his feelings about his father's shooting (the second one, not the third... damn, D.L got shot too much); as Hana was a disembodied spirit inhabiting the Net then, does that make it a cargo ship?
- Taking Cybersex to the next level, clearly
- Mohinder/Sylar is so well known that the actors have made numerous references to it and have expressed interest in making a romantic comedy sitcom. So if Heroes ends after Season 4, there may still be hope for the show's best loved character and its most hated.
- Claude/Pigeons. Well, he had been alone for seven years with almost no human contact...
- Nathan/zucchini ( inspired by Nathan's quote in Parasite)
- Sylar/Heidi. Disturbing as it is, in season one's Bad Future, this might have actually happened. As of season three's finale, some fans are hoping it still might.
- The Heroes Slash Manual is an authoritative guide to many things slash in the Heroes universe. It should be noted that "one day" every character will maintain a romantic relationship with Kaito Nakamura, and that Sylar is Mr. Muggles' bitch.
- Hogan/Klink in Hogans Heroes. An example of Foe Yay gone too far? Or a justification of how the POWs had it so easy? You decide.
- Star Trek Voyager. Despite having no romantic subtext whatsoever, Seven of Nine was paired up with Chakotay, simply because Robert Beltran (Chakotay) dared Jeri Ryan's then-boyfriend (executive producer Brannon Braga) to do it. This was despite a well-established relationship between Seven and the Doctor.
- The Chakotay/Seven relationship was a follow-up from "Human Error" in which Seven is experimenting with human emotions and relationships on the holodeck and chooses Chakotay for her romantic encounters. This is itself a follow up from "Unimatrix Zero" where Seven learns that she had a romantic relationship, which she has missed since the Unimatrix was destroyed. So despite what the J/C'ers say, this relationship didn't come out of nowhere. As for Chakotay's side of the equation, maybe Seven asked him out. Is it likely he would have turned her down? I don't think so.
- Uh-uh. It's VERY clearly laid out - in canon - that Seven could have been paired off with EITHER Janeway or the Doctor. The building blocks for the latter are in 'Someone To Watch Over Me' and the end of 'Virtuoso' (check out Seven's fan letter!) - and as for a Janeway/Seven pairing... there is simply no other way to explain the two-parter 'Dark Frontier'. As has been mentioned here as well, there is canon material for a Kim/Seven shipping ('Very well. Take off your clothes...' and 'Don't be alarmed. I won't hurt you.'), and God knows that she's spent enough time with Tuvok and Tom Paris. Rumor is that Beltran wasn't happy about his amount of screen time, and they tossed him the C/7 pairing as a consolation prize - "hell, it's the 'Final Season!' Who cares if we screw things up now?"
- You forgot Seven's almost-relationship with Harry Kim.
- Wow, Seven's a dirty girl. But at least Chakotay can have threesomes.
- Q/Picard. It needs to be said.
- Kinda justified by Q's line in one episode that if he knew ahead of time what effect a female could have on Picard, he would have appeared as a female.
- At least one Sarah Connor Chronicles fic involves Allison/Cameron.
- Summer Glau and... Summer Glau?
- Allison Cameron? Hmm...
- On the one hand, that concept is disturbing as hell. On the other hand....
- Over at the Ex Isle forums, one person who was involved with the show was questioned about whether Cameron was anatomically correct or not, and implied that she was. Let the fapping commence.
- From The A Team - B.A./Murdock.
- Ronon Dex/Ryan Ross of Panic at the Disco.
- In House, Foreman/Thirteen. As of Christmas episode '08. May be short-term, like each time the writers try to re-pair House and Cuddy.
- They claim it's until the end of season 5, at least. There's stranger in fanfics out there. Chase/Stacy, anyone? Cuddy/Cameron? Tritter raping House?
- Don't forget the surprisingly large smattering of Wilson/Foreman fic that's out there. Or House/Evil Nurse Brenda.
- It's possible Frankie Boyle was just making it up, but he claims there's Mock The Week Slash... and it pairs him and Hugh Dennis.
- Such a thing does indeed exist, and while Frankie/Hugh is one of if not the most common pairing (thus not really a crack pairing as far as the fandom are concerned), it's by no means the only one. There's even an LJ community devoted to it.
- Eurovision slash fic. From 2006, Mr. Lordi depicted as an actual monster/Dima Bilan.
- Most pairings from Generation Kill appear perfectly sane at first glance, with plenty of Ho Yay to make the pairing plausible. Consider, however, that the fandom generally bases itself around the HBO miniseries, which is an adaptation of the book, which was written by a reporter who rode in Sergeant Colbert's Humvee; you have a cracky variation on real-person slash.
- Captain John Hart/Poodle. But this is a man who will shag Anything That Moves, So Yeah...
- From Doctor Who, Mickey Smith/K-9.
- On FanForum.net there is a thread dedicated to the pairing Sandy/Penelope. Not only are these two character incredibly minor, having only been present in less than 5 episodes of Season 1, they never met. The reason they're shipped? They're played by Alexis Denisof (Wesley) and Amy Acker (Fred).
- iCarly nearly had a crack pair go into canon. Lewburt (their insane doorman) and Ms Benson. Only saved when Freddie was thrown down the stairs and hurt himself so his mother would go back to caring for him instead of Lewburt. It's so cracky it hasn't even had a single fanfic written about it on the major fanfic sites.
- Spam (Sam/Spencer) is probably just barely a crackship due to their ages, with Sam somewhere around 14, and Spencer around 28. It hasn't stopped the fics though.
Newspaper Comics
- Gary Larson once got hatemail because people thought one of his strips indicated that a dog's innermost desire is to hump a car. A unique example in that the pairing is defined by its opponents. He has since admitted he should have left out the crankcase (which is why people assumed the dog was humping it rather than celebrating its defeat of the car).
Real Life
- Real Life subject: This hamster and snake, at the Tokyo zoo, given Owen/Mzee a run for their money.
- Just go on Youtube and look up "[insert animal name] [insert different animal name] sex" and see what pops up. It's mostly dog/cat sex, but rewards await the creative and depraved.
Tabletop Games
Video Games
- King Of Fighters: Iori/Kasumi is popular within the fandom, for whatever reason. They've never ever even fought each other.
- Chrono Trigger: Lucca/Magus. It's a pairing of the two characters least likely to have a relationship (not with each other, with anyone), and yet it's one of the most popular pairings in the Chrono Trigger community! Their logic is likely based on how Lucca assists Magus in every multiple person technique that he can use. All two of them.
- The appeal of Lucca and Magus together probably stems from their similarities to Bulma and Vegeta.
- Samus/Ridley of Metroid (yes, the giant space dragon), made worse as a kind of Foe Yay combined with his being the only constant male (or entity with a name) in her life, not counting her starship computer.
- Nel and Albel from Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. It might make some sense if they even hated each other, given they're from opposing countries; but when they're in the same party they just don't care.
- There's also Albel/Sophia, which actually became very popular in the fandom at one point. They never interact in the game.
- The Kingdom Hearts Fan Vid Okay, Humor Me parodies this, with Selphie explaining crack pairings to Kairi.
- There are 78 possible pairings within Organization XIII, without throwing Namine into the mix, and there's a legion of fangirls behind every single one.
- Xion's inclusion into the organization means 13 new pairings. Bringing the total pairing count within the organization to 91.
- There's also Zexion/Iced Tea. I don't know either.
- I once read a g-rated Goofy/Aerith. Yes, it actually worked.
- Team Fortress 2 has an astounding amount of slash for a game which consists of guys shooting and blowing each other to bits.
- From The Legend Of Zelda, there's a small following for Marin/Malon. (Malon being The Ocarina of Time’s version of Marin from the previous game, Link's Awakening, making it Expycest, one degree away from Selfcest.)
- Ever seen Epona/Link? Yeah. And it's more then just one story...
- Epona/Tingle. *shudders*
- No, no, no. It's gotta be Tingle/Link.
- Gauron/Link!
- Poe Collector/Link.
- No matter what, it can't get any sicker than Linebeck/Link. Yeah, lots and lots of fanart exists of this one on Deviant Art.
- ...please tell me they make Link older? Please?
- Hell no. <3
- Redead/Link. Hooo Booooy.
- EmblemShipping Marth and either Ike or Roy. Even though, outside of Super Smash Bros, it's impossible.
- Ike/Pit or Marth/Pit is just as weird. What do they have in common? Ike's a badass mercenary who "fights for his friends," while Pit is an angel who battles eggplant humanoids. And Marth's an effeminate male. Yeah... let's just say "any pairing inspired by Super Smash Bros" and leave it at that.
- Samus/Snake is canon, dammit.
- No it isn't.
- Hells yes.
- It is, at least as far as Snake's half goes, as evidenced by the Codec transmissions on Shadow Moses Island. David Hayter, the voice of Snake, vaguely confirmed it at Anime Expo 2008. (His exact words were "Samus? Oh, yeah, she's hot.")
- Meta Knight/Jigglypuff. AND IT WORKED.
- Meta Knight/Kirby? Oh, and please link to the Meta Knight/Jigglypuff...
- Samus/Pikachu. There are doujins of this pairing. doujins!
- Any pairing with Mr. Game & Watch, anyone?
- Speaking of doujinshi involving Pikachu in crack pairs, there used to be a series of Final Fantasy VII\Pokemon crossover doujinshi. They involve a gay love triangle between Pikachu, Vincent, and Sephiroth, in which Vincent gets pregnant and isn't sure who the father is. Sephiroth pulls a jerk move and suggests Vincent get an abortion, but Pikachu embraces this and promises to be the best father ever. They marry at the end.
- Someone actually ***ing DREW THIS CRAP? Not just tapped it out on a keyboard, but spent the time to draw these characters in a doujinshi? *boom*
- Peach/Zelda. It's crack, yes. But damnit, it WORKS.
- Snake/Luigi is pretty weird.
- I heartily support two Smash OT Ps: Marth/youngLink, and Marth/ch—Toony.
- The unfinished Tier War fanfic video has Ganon/Jigglypuff. It was played for laughs, but...
- There's quite a bit of fanart of a Crossover Ship in the form of Link/Amaterasu. Especially disconcerting, as the latter participant of the pairing is a wolf.
- Well, Link is sometimes a wolf, too...
- There's also Ammy/the half-baked prophet Waka, who is at least from her own game.
- And Ammy/Issun.
- At the beginning of the Golden Sun fandom, there was a lot of random shipping going around. The most common by far were Isaac/Mia, Garet/Jenna (both of which at least have some basis in canon), and qualifying for this trope, Ivan/Sheba. The two are both Wind Adepts and are somewhat snarky teenagers...That's about all they have in common. They barely say two words to each other over the course of both games. Ivan seems worried for her safety (notably yelling "We won't let you lay a finger on Felix or Sheba!" at one point), but only as much as the rest of the party.
- This guy does a Krizalid/
Hong Meiling China pairing. How an insane pyromaniac genetic experiment and a Chinese redhead butt-monkey youkai can love each other is not mentioned.
- Have you stepped inside the Ace Attorney fandom lately? There's quite few of these there, too. One of the more interesting ones is SPARTA (Spark Brushel/Lotta Hart) - they never meet in the canon, but there seems to be a rising consensus among the fans that this reporting duo would make a perfect match.
- Then you have the Damon Gant/Everyone pairing. Erm...
- Crossover Ship Lisa Basil/GLaDOS shippers.
- And Godot/Coffee as well.
- What, you mean Godot/Coffee isn't canon?!
- Maya/Matt. They have never even been in the same room, and Matt hired an assassin who kidapped Maya in order to get Phoenix to defend Matt for the murder he paid the assassin to commit.
- Kristoph Gavin/Dahlia Hawthorne, though they've never met in canon, is fairly popular and always described as "a match made in hell." Probably literally.
- Maximillian Galactica/Acro. There are doujinshi of this.
- Colette/Kratos.
- I can so top that. Noishe/Stella. Thankfully, Noishe was human at the time ...
- Sync/Arietta, despite them rarely interacting and merely being in one group, is quite popular. Never mind that Arietta is obsessed with Ion only, and Sync is obsessed with being a Nietzsche Wannabe and acting out like a Jerkass whenever possible...
- But isn't Sync Ion's clone? He was able to floor Anise by taking advantage of literally being another Ion. With that in mind, Arietta would probably be thrilled.
- Yggdrassil/Dist. They're both rather crazy girly-men who have tons of Ho Yay with their friends and a psychotic need to resurrect a dead lady... which is opposed by a red-eyed person despite them having even more of a reason to resurrect her.
- Ahem. Fawful/Mimi,
anyone? (Dead Link What's strangest about it is how much it makes sense...
- Sherry/Claire. Uh-oh, are those sirens?
- Why don't you have a seat over there
- There is a truly bizarre amount of Jill/Nemesis out there. True, Nemesis does spend a majority of the game chasing after Jill. With a rocket launcher. And there's the whole bit about him being a monster.
- Megaman/Sera, with hints of Megaman/Yuna. Amazingly, it's reasonably well written. Still, it doesn't get much stranger than that.
- There's Sora/Larxene. Yes, THAT Larxene. With THAT Sora. One with Larxene being something of a sadistic stalker, another played with the two genuinely in love, without being idiots, with a completely straight face.
- Teddie/Kanji is one of the more popular ships in the Persona 4 fandom, all because of one scene in which a drunk Teddie kisses Kanji. The latter's ambiguous sexuality probably doesn't help matters either...
- Sonic the Hedgehog: Take any character and pair them with any other character, and there will be fanart of it. NO EXCEPTIONS. There's a club on Deviant ART dedicated to Shadow and Tikal as a pairing. Seriously, what?
- One user is trying to draw as many different Sonic pairings as possible. At the moment she has over 130. Including such pairings as Scratch X Cosmo or Bokkun X Dulcy.
- Tails Doll/Marine!
- One pairing that's really a stretch is Sonic and Metal Sonic. The reason being that Metal Sonic is obsessively programmed to KILL Sonic.
- Fire Emblem doesn't even need wacky fan pairings (though there are certainly plenty of those out there): some of the canon pairing possibilities are downright Crack Pairings. Examples given on the Troper Tales page are: Sylvia/Claude from the 4th game, Harken/Vaida from the 7th game, Kyle/Lute from the 8th game, and Astrid/Malakov from the 10th game.
- Of course, if you take any support as a pairing possibility, it gets even worse. Florina/Serra, anyone?
- In "Snake Tale E: External Gazer" (on the Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance disc), the way Snake knows that the Mei Ling he's working with is a warped Alternate Universe counterpart of her real self is that she's married to Solidus. Solidus is as evil and tentacled as ever, and the two seem to be very much in love with each other. Also, the Alternate Universe version of Olga is married to someone, and although we never find out who, the implication (and Word Of God) is that it was Snake.
- The Metal Gear Solid 3 Secret Theater shorts used these for humour a lot, between EVA/The End, EVA/Sigint, and Big Boss/the Director of the CIA (they get married at the end).
- Metal Gear Solid 4 takes four pairings with little to no basis and makes them all canon. Meryl/Johnny is the one with the most prior canon; Roy/Rose never met; Naomi/Otacon got one line in Metal Gear Solid where Otacon says he feels sorry for Naomi but never met; and Naomi/Vamp was just a case of Rule Of Sexy.
- Someone's gonna kill me for this, no doubt, but I've taken to shipping Liquid Snake with... Psycho Mantis. Note that pairing Psycho Mantis with anyone is crack in of itself.
- Speaking of Liquid, I've taken to shipping him with Otacon. Yes, Otacon. And I'm not alone.
- Being as I am the person who suggested the above relating to Psycho Mantis, I applaud you and hope you find many wonderful fanworks for your pairing of choice.
- Due to the nature of the game (being mythology), as well as Amaterasu's disturbing tendancey to get Little Black Dress'd thanks to the fandom, most of the pairings in Okami are this. Just look at the more popular pairings with Ammy if want to see how messed up things can become:
- Amaterasu/Oki (A wolf and a half man/half wolf)
- Amaterasu/Waka (A wolf and a man from the moon)
- Amaterasu/Issun (A wolf and a creature who's around an inch high).
- Heck, there's fanart of Blight/Kaguya.
- Zoey / the Witch. Actually, not that bad...
- Colonel Christopher Blair/Ralgha "Hobbes" nar Hhallas was once spotted. The viewer's mind has not been the same sense.
- Megaman X has a lot of these, which is to be expected with a series that is 99% male. The most infamous is X/Vile despite the fact that Vile was a hateful killing machine that kept trying to kill X.
- Numerous doujinshi of Alia/Dynamo, despite the fact they have never met, Dynamo is mostly a joke boss and a lackey of Sigma. Which leads to Dynamo/Sigma.
- Lumine/Axl, despite technically being half-brothers. Also Lumine/X. Both sometimes involve Naughty Tentacles.
- Ferham/Zero, due to the fact that she's a sadomasochist and was pretty saucy when she repeatedly whipped Zero. The fact that Zero goes missing for a section of the game and never explains what happens allows ample opportunity for shenanigans.
- There was also smut fanart of Colonel/Signas. Yes, really.
- Megaman suffers the same problem. There's a pairing between almost every single Robot Master, Doctor Light or Doctor Wily with one of their creations (or each other), and Roll with practically everyone. Even the pet animal robots like Tango and Rush get in on the action.
- Samus/Master Chief.
- Dissidia opened the way for Terra/Cloud.
- Athena Prime has corroded forever the way this troper sees Canderous and Bastila's argument. I also had the misfortune of seeing an HK-47/Juhani (I needed some sake and a side of Brain Bleach after that one), and Canderous/Zaalbar (which I wasn't brave (or drunk) enough to read all the way through.
- Silent Hill, being what it is, has ships that defy the rules of space/time. James / Harry is the most common cross-game ship, though This Troper has also seen Walter / Heather, and of course Pyramid Head / Everybody.
Webcomics
- Someone actually wrote up a Order of the Stick crack pairing generator on the forums. Apparently d6 and d20 dice can be just as twisted as we can.
- For all the inherent wrong-ness, some of the fics there are hysterical, and the art can be so hilarious.
- Vaarsuvius has been named the official bike of the OOTS crack fandom. Everyone gets a ride.
- Visit The Crack Pairings Thread and Help Spread the Love. (Image of the Crack Pairing). Yes, That kind of Love.
- Kimiko and Largo are from Megatokyo don't speak the same language and are romantically involved with each other's best friends, but their scenes together have been noted to be incredible cute all the same. It's actually become a running joke how the normally girl-averse Largo trusts and respects the girl, complementing Piro on his taste in women.
- And as a corollary to the above pairing, Piro/Erika (the canon love interests of the aforementioned Kimiko/Largo).
- Miho and Largo used to be a near canon Foe Yay pairing, but as Largo/Erika and Piro/Miho emerged it seems a lot of fans don't even remember those days and subsquently view their shippers with a mixture of vague confusion and amuzement.
- Ping/Yuki are occasionally shipped for simple Pair The Spares reasoning, and in their defense had a short of vague Sempai Kohai relationship in their one real scene together.
- Some fans have even suggested Ping/Yuji (Yuki's computer savvy brother), for similar reasons. To date, the two have never met.
- Miho/Tsubasa. Not only have they never met in canon, but the latter hasn't even been in the story for several years.
- There is apparently a small portion of the El Goonish Shive fandom that ships Tedd/Nanase.
- A popular Meme on the Eight Bit Theater Forums is to mention the semi-non-existant (yeah, semi) Fanfiction "Colors of Magic, Colors of Love" and to jokingly suggest making it Canon. What's this fanfiction about, you ask? The pairing Black Mage/Red Mage. UAGH.
- A running gag on the College Roomies From Hell!!! fora is to pair April with Margaret or Blue (usually Blue), April being the most prominent character without an attainable love interest.
Western Animation
Web Original
- Homestar Runner apparently has a huge, active shipping community for a cartoon with a running gag about having "Only One Girl".
- Alluded to canonicly here, with the pair being Marzipan x The Cheat.
- Actually, there's a valid love triangle between Marzipan, Homestar and The Cheat. Why does a Granola Girl have to choose between a humanoid ditz and a Hypercompetent Sidekick? Because the Brother Chaps said so.
- Coffeex Chipwich: actually suggested in a cartoon. (They're supposedly Homsar's parents.)
- Im A Marvel And Im A Dc - plenty, but mainly Green Goblin/Harley Quinn.
"I'm just a goblin, standing in front of a clown, asking her to love him. What's so complicated about that?"
Other
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