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Funny / Phelous 2009 Episodes

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    I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer 
  • The review opens with a sketch parodying the original movie, with Phelous going to get his mail and finding the DVD in a package saying "I know what you watched last summer". He then proceeds to parody the infamous "What are you waiting for?" scene by screaming out "What do you want from me?"... before finding a note along with the DVD saying "Review it!"
  • The start of the review merits a mention:
    Phelous: This movie sucks.
    The End
  • Phelous comments that, as far as Slasher movies go, the killer's motive in the first movie actually makes sense, since he has perfectly legitimate reasons to be pissed at the teenagers who ran over him with a car and then left him to drown even though they knew he was dead... except for the fact he also kills plenty of people who had nothing to do with this on his way to slaughter them.
    Phelous: So I guess his revenge is pretty broad... or I mean, either that or running him over and trying to drown him activated Serial Killer mode in his brain.
    • Moreover, he notices that for all his talk about revenge, the Fisherman insists on going after the Final Girl and Jack Black while ignoring good opportunities to kill the Jerkass character who actually was the primary responsible for leaving him dead.
  • After listing the names for the first two movies, respectively I Know What You Did Last Summer and I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, he comments that the next movie should have been called "I Forgot What You Did Last Summer''.
  • When listing the various suspects, Phelous mentions the creepy deputy, the sheriff, the victim's cousin Lance, and That Guy With The Glasses.
  • Phelous's epic Freak Out! upon discovering that the killer in I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer was a zombie fisherman? A zombie fisherman!? A ZOMBIE FISHERMAN!?
  • The protagonist insists that they can't call the cops because no one will believe them:
    Phelous: You're right, I am watching this shit, and I still don't believe it!
  • Later, when the cops ask them if they can identify their agressor:
    Phelous: Yeah, it was a teleporting zombie fisherman!

    The Ruins 

    Troll 2 

  • Poking fun of the whole "Someone's rubbing puppets on us!" effects used, there's a scene where Phelous is attacked by a Kermit The Frog plushie.
    • What really sells this is the song that plays when Kermit is gnawing Phelous's face off.
      Kermit: Why are there so many songs about rainbows? And what's on the other si—
      Phelous: Cut it out! (flings Kermit away with a large thud)

    Troll 3 
  • Phelous' utter confusion over the fact this movie was released under five completely different titles, making him wonder if the movie was so bad they felt like they needed to change its title each time to avoid bad word to mouth.
  • In Phelous' opinion, the best actor in the movie is Wolfie the dog, because at least he doesn't look directly into the camera.
  • The girl at the opening escapes her attempted rapist by inflicting him a Groin Attack:
    Rapist driver (in pain): She shouldn't have done that!
    Phelous!Rapist driver: Doesn't she know what I am trying to do?! Oh, wait, maybe she does know what I am trying to do, and that's why she did that!
    Rapist driver: Hey! Come on, out now... or I am going to leave you here!
  • The constant POV shots to show people being killed by the plants causes Phelous to believe a cameraman crawling in the grass is killing everyone, to the point he is surprised when it's revealed it was, indeed, killing plants.
  • The Running Gag of the overly long chase scene.
  • The end skit has toy bulldozers rushing to attack Phelous. The sound and editing are timed perfectly.
    • The effect of Phelous having a root poke through his eye that surpasses the one in the movie: He uses a stick and a paper cutout of his face.
    Phelous: AHHHHHHH, REAL!

    Cabin Fever 

    The Midnight Meat Train 
  • Phelous realizes with a Face Palm that calling the video "Phelous Aboard the Meat Train" probably wasn't his smartest choice:
    Phelous: Why would I call this video that? It might as well be Phallus instead of Phelous, right? Let's call it Phallus Aboard the Meat Train!
  • The protagonist Leon avert a rape by pointing out to the thugs that there is a camera:
    Leon: You ever starred in a movie before?
    Phelous!Thug: Yeah, but not a good one.
  • Phelous reacting with complete hilarity to the death scenes due to how over the top and ridiculous they are.
    Phelous: Kinda like a Mortal Kombat Fatality. (Subzero rushes toward him, threatening to hit him) Don't worry, I'm not gonna do it!
    Subzero: You better not! (leave)
    • Phelous then technically keeps his word and doesn't uses do a Mortal Kombat reference when describing the death scenes... he instead uses the gag during the sex scene between Leon and his girlfriend. Which makes Subzero so sad and disgusted he doesn't even bother hitting Phelous, not even when Phelous does use it for a death scene later.
  • When it's revealed the killer has a hook, Phelous suffer a flashback from the Zombie Fisherman scene in I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer.
  • Three of the victims are a couple and another guy trying to convince them into having a threesome. Then the killer murders them all, including one with a Groin Attack using the aforementioned hook:
    Phelous: Ow, forget about having even a onesome now!
  • "If I hide long enough, maybe he will disappear! Oh, no, still there, I better run away in a secluded area away from the other people!"
  • When it's revealed the cop is part of the conspiracy around the killer:
    Phelous: Just like in Troll 3! That must be where they got their inspiration from! (his face becomes horrified)
  • "Anyway, Leon ends up defeating the Butcher!" (Legend of Zelda victory music plays)
  • The sharply dressed killer stands up, straightens his tie and gets on the eponymous subway train. Phelous sets the whole thing to the theme from Get Smart. It fits. Perfectly.

    Silent Hill: Shattered Memories 
  • His spoof on the alternate personalities in Silent Hill: Shattered Memories with rapid fire Shout Outs to The Cinema Snob, The Nostalgia Critic, and The Angry Video Game Nerd, as well as a Take That! to The Irate Gamer.
    Phelous (as Angry Video Game Nerd): Shattered Memories? More like shattered asshole! I'd rather play a different game than play this game!
    Phelous (as Nostalgia Critic): Hello, Silent Hill shattered my memories! I don't remember it so you don't have to!
    Phelous (as Cinema Snob): In my expert opinion, Silent Hill: Shattered Memories is a game (pause) that came out on the (pause) in December 2009.
    Phelous (as Irate Gamer): Silent Hill: Shattered Memories is the perfect predecessor to the first Silent Hill game.

    Resident Evil 
  • The opening segment of the review parodies the intro of the original Resident Evil game, including the cheesy live action cinematic and character presentation, with Chris Redfield coughing due to smoking, Barry eating a sandwitch and Wesker looking himself into the mirror.
    "There are three movies left: Resident Evil, Apocalypse and Extinction. We don't know where Degeneration is."
  • The Naked Alice Count.
  • Him pointing out just how incompetent this incarnation of the Umbrella Corporation is, as their emergency procedure for the Hive consists in basically killing everyone inside and putting the whole building in quarantine to contain the virus, yet they didn't give the computer in charge any mean to contact them in order to warn after this and instead have to send a squad to check this out without telling them anything about what there was inside.
  • Phelous thinks the squad's weapon agains the Red Queen is a button to send her endless YouTube comments until she fries.
  • "So, in case of emergency, basically their plan was DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING!"
  • "After they killed that zombie, expecting some more lasers to come from around the corner, but in an actual twist, there are more zombies in this supposed Resident Evil movie." (applaud sounds)

    Resident Evil Apocalypse 
  • "So we start this one with seeing the second team they send into the Hive weren't prepared either and start getting killed! I guess Umbrella just never really get tired of sending teams in to die for informations they already should have had!"
  • Upon seeing Jill got disgraced and suspended in that universe, Phelous wonders what got her into this situation. Cue a scene of Jill showing up at the police office to start randomly shooting zombies with no warning.
    Phelous: ... Okay, probably something to do with that kind of behaviour...
  • When Jill frees someone by shooting at his handcuff, Phelous comments that this incarnation of Jill doesn't appear to be quite the master of unlocking.
  • When noticing Umbrella somehow managed to have walls around all of Racoon City, Phelous wonders if these walls always were there, or if being the master of Wall-building is the one thing Umbrella is competent at.
  • "Yup, that takes care of the evil motorcycle..."
  • Phelous' interview with Barry Burton to figure out just how much this movie got wrong about S.T.A.R.S.
  • Upon hearing Ashford created the T-Virus while searching for a cure to his daughter's paralysis:

    Resident Evil Extinction 

    Fear Dot Com 


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