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Kid Icarus
- Around the first third of the episode, The Nerd goes off on a tangent about the birth of Orion, who came to be after three Gods urinated on a bull's hide and buried it, then months later Orion was born. Not satisfied, he starts pondering on whether they did the deed all at once or took turns.
- It evolves into a talk about a conflict between Horus and Set for the throne Egypt that involves another bodily fluid. The Nerd has a brief breakdown on he comments on the absurdity of history, before he returns to the game with the most faked smile he could muster prior to frowning as usual.
- Two words: Nerd Farms. Complete with a very elaborate montage of a proper farm pitch.
Earthworm Jim Trilogy
- The Nerd praises the first game as he goes through the first two levels, "New Junk City" and "What the Heck?", saying that he can't say enough good things about it. When he gets to the third level, "Down the Tubes", he dies during the section where he travels through the ocean in a submarine, trying not to go too fast and take damage within the time limit. After losing all of his lives, the Nerd says the game sucks, pulls the cartridge out of his 32X (and in the process, accidentally pulls the 32X out of the Genesis and has to put it back in) and smashes the cartridge with a hammer. Realizing that there are still more levels in the game to go through, the Nerd says he shouldn't have done that, then hastily puts the cartridge back together and puts it back in the 32X to keep playing the game. Even though the cartridge can't even fit properly, the game still works.
- The Nerd ends up triggering a glitch in level 4 where he gets stuck in a wall while a grunting sound plays on loop.
- On the "For Pete's Sake" level, the Nerd talks about how cute the puppy he's escorting is.Nerd: Aw, look at that cute little puppy just skipping around! So carefree. Aw, love that little guy—
(the puppy mutates into a monster that mauls Earthworm Jim)
Nerd: O-O-O-OH SHIT! - For the most part, the Nerd is able to handle the first game's Toilet Humor, such as the fart sounds and mucus, but he is disgusted by the Genesis-exclusive seventh level, "Intestinal Distress". There are a few moments where the Nerd looks like he's about to hurl.
- Considering how gross the last level was, the Nerd expects the next level "Buttville" to be even worse. When he sees what it looks like, he decides it's not so bad since it's just a bunch of spikes and lightning.
- After beating the first game, the Nerd concludes that it's a great game with great variety and a great sense of humor, but has a few frustrating parts. At that point, the cartridge falls apart; the Nerd just gives a little Shrug Take.
- The Nerd then introduces the Balance of Shit Justice, with the game he reviews being on the left side being near a meter which has "GREAT" in the green section at the bottom, and "SHIT" being at the dark red section at the top, with sections for "GOOD", "OK", and "BAD" in yellow, orange, and red in between. Every flaw, represented by a turd, moves the game up into a worse section. The first game is fortunate enough to be in the yellow section that says "GOOD".
- The Nerd is flabbergasted by the humor in the second game's first level, which involves taking pigs from pig pens and sending them down water slides so they can land in fish bowls and putting them on boards of wood to raise weights. Leaving the pigs alone causes them to meditate and float away. One of Jim's idle animations involves him pulling a tiny guy out of his pocket and eating him. Jim later steals motorized stair chairs from old ladies, and the second level, "Lorenzen's Soil" involves Jim moving dirt around, which the Nerd admits is the most worm-like thing Jim has done thus far.
- Upon reaching the game show section in "Jim is a Blind Cave Salamander", the Nerd is so flabbergasted at the game's sense of humor that he comes up with his own idea for a video game that runs on moon logic puzzles.Nerd: Hey, I got an idea for a game. How about, you're um... an Eastern Spadefoot Toad in the Helix Nebula, and you gotta stab foil chairs with rubber chickens and out come marble giraffes, and you have to balance the giraffes on feather wreaths, and you take them to hot tubs full of salsa, which transforms the giraffes into cat trophies, which you have to collect and place all the trophies along a line of Twizzlers before a blue panda comes and eats them all and then morphs into a giant ball of metal slime!
- The Nerd wonders why the games keep making jokes about cows.Nerd: What is this preposterous preoccupation with cows? Just some random animal that you can't stop referencing? Alright let's play some more of this buffalo shit.
- One sentence the Nerd says sums up just how weird the Earthworm Jim games are.Nerd: Don't you hate it when you get stuck between a filing cabinet and a magician's coffin?
- The Nerd eventually gets to the ninth level, "Forked", which is called "Totally Forked" in other regions. He then jokes that his region couldn't handle the joke and wonders if there's a region that called the level "Totally fucked".
- After beating the second game, the Nerd concludes that that while the first game was mostly fun, the second one felt more like torture. When sent to the Balance of Shit Justice, it manages to get to the orange section that says "OK" while staying just a bit out of "Bad".
- When the Nerd plays the third game, Jim keeps shouting "Brain!" at random intervals, to which the Nerd questions if it's going to be the new "Where did you learn to fly?". It ends up rubbing off on him, leading him to randomly shout "Brain!" throughout the rest of the review.
- Trying to keep himself sane while playing the third game, the Nerd does insane things, one of which is placing his stuffed Donkey Kong over a chocolate waterfall, making it look like DK's taking a shit.
- The Nerd questioning the position of the cannon on Psycrow's tank during the battle against it.
- After beating the third game, the Nerd places it on the Balance of Shit Justice, where it ends up in the dark red "SHIT" section, saying that it's Awful Shit, even when compared to Enjoyable Shit or Fair Shit like 3D movies.
- The Nerd ends his review by revealing that he's really a cow, in a nod to the ending of the second game.
Indiana Jones: Crystal Skull + More
- The Nerd's 2008 counterpart mentions the Commodore 64 had a game based on The Last Crusade that was a shittier version of a Genesis game, which was pretty shitty itself. The latter has the scene where Indy pours water from the Holy Grail onto his father, but the Nerd points out how questionable it looks.
- 2008 Nerd reviews the PC version of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, which is a point-and-click adventure game. When Indy comes to a water fountain, he is supposed to be bending over to drink from it, but since he isn't, the Nerd concludes that Indy is peeing in it. He considers it canon since it was developed by LucasFilm Games (later LucasArts).
- 2008 Nerd decides to play a new game based on Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. The game he's playing is for the Leap Frog Didj, a handheld that is geared towards children and meant to be educational.
- The Didj comes with sticker overlays that you can place over the handheld, namely a white honeycomb design or a green polka-dot design; 2008 Nerd chooses the green polka dots. He then finds out that the Didj also comes with a protective cover. Placing it over the handheld covers up the overlay, defeating the purpose of it.
- 2008 Nerd questions why Indy's son is named "Mutt".
- 2008 Nerd is flabbergasted when he sees Indy punching oversized scorpions and rats to defeat them.
- As the Didj is an educational console, it has levels where Indy needs to solve math problems, whether it be to open a treasure chest or land on the right platform. For the latter, if Indy lands on the platform with a wrong answer, it disappears and Indy falls to his doom. 2008 Nerd says that people expect him to be good at math since he's a nerd, but he's really not, and if his life depended on knowing the math, he'd be screwed.2008 Nerd: Imagine that. I walk up to the platform and then someone asks, "Quick, what's 32 divided by 8?" I'd be like "Fuuuuck!"
- 2008 Nerd finds out that solving math problems to open chests is optional, since all they do are give you points. This defeats the purpose of the game's educational value, since the kids who are supposed to be learning math are going to skip the chest just so they can play the action parts.
- There's a level where 2008 Nerd plays as Mutt climbing vines. He bets that none of this happens in the movie and remarks, "What next, is there gonna be a bunch of monkeys?" Meanwhile, the final boss is a statue that's come to life, which 2008 Nerd thinks will be in the movie.
- After defeating the boss, Irina Spalko, 2008 Nerd is flabbergasted to find that the game allows him to continuously whack her with Mutt's sword.2008 Nerd: Spalko? More like Spanko!
- After beating the game, 2008 Nerd says that he had high expectations for anything new, but he is still excited to see Kingdom of The Crystal Skull, saying it'll be Indiana Jones' last movie, as it's not like there'll be any way to de-age Harrison Ford. He compares it to himself coming back to the same episode in fifteen years. Then he says "Fuck this Didj game. 'Didj' you know it's a piece of shit?" and tries to whip the cartridge. The first time, he misses, so he tries again, and misses once more. He then ask the viewers if they really expected him to hit the cartridge since it's so small.
- There's a game on the PC called Indiana Jones and His Desktop Adventures. 2008 Nerd sarcastically calls it a really exciting name, saying it would be like calling one of the movies Indiana Jones and the Movie Escapade.
- While going into the backstory of Indiana Jones' creation, 2008 Nerd says that the franchise was inspired by many old film serials and movies that Steven Spielberg and George Lucas saw when they were young, as well as the Scrooge McDuck comics by Carl Barks. He is then about to play what looks like another Indiana Jones game, only for the camera to zoom out and reveal that it's really Earnest Evans for the Sega Genesis.
- 2008 Nerd claims Indiana Jones and the Emperor's Tomb was fairly recent while holding a box that clearly has a pre-played game sticker on it.
- 2008 Nerd reviews Indy's first 3D game, Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine for the Nintendo 64. After looking up the dictionary definition of Infernal, meaning irritating or tiresome, he compares the game's title to something Shredder would say.
- The game has a scene where a CIA agent says Indy's a famous archaeologist while he's "just" a spy.
- One of the weapons that Indy can use is a pair of boxing gloves, which allow him to punch enemies. 2008 Nerd questions the logic of this, since Indy punches barehanded anyway. He is then flabbergasted when Indy kills a snake by punching the air above it.
- During a scene where Indy is talking to a wall again, 2008 Nerd figures that the snake venom is making him feel funny.
- When Indy dives into the water, 2008 Nerd points out that he never wears his hat while swimming, as it would be unrealistic to swim with a hat on. When he comes out of the water, the hat re-appears, and 2008 Nerd concludes that every time he goes into the water, he loses his hat, and when he comes out, he puts a new one on, meaning Indy has an unlimited supply of hats in his pants.
- After getting several glitches where Indy gets stuck while jumping, 2008 Nerd says the game is so fucked It Belongs in a Museum.
- When 2008 Nerd gets frustrated trying to make a leap of faith, he tries to whip the cartridge out of his N64, only for the cartridge to counter his attack with a sword, in a parody of the swordsman scene from the first movie. He then uses his modded NES Zapper to shoot the cartridge, which tries to shoot him with a gun of its own, in a parody of the Greedo scene from A New Hope, specifically all the George Lucas Altered Version changes to it, complete with the cartridge saying "Maclunkey" and the Nerd's head digitally shifting to dodge the shot.
- After 2008 Nerd is upset that Crystal Skull wasn't as good as Raiders and Crusade, he asks who would have thought that a movie made in the year 2008 would use CGi effects. He then says that if they're making another Indiana Jones movie, he's not watching it. Cut to fifteen years later, where the Nerd's 2023 counterpart is about to see Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny. Before he does, he reveals that he found the real dial, which has the power to change the course of history. Upon seeing what looks like mud on it, he realizes it isn't mud; it's diarrhea, meaning he found the Diarrhea Dial.
- It's notable that 2008 Nerd didn't mention Temple of Doom, implying he at least thought Crystal Skull was better than that movie.
- Given how, out of character as the Nerd, James Rolfe has said several times he thought Crystal Skull was alright, to the point where he ranked it number one on his list of "Top 10 Sequels That Aren't as Bad as Everyone Says
", his overdramatic criticism was likely lampooning the overly vitriolic hate the movie got.
- 2008 Nerd unveils his DVD box set of The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones, which has a Revolution Interactive Game on the twelfth disc. When 2023 Nerd turns the Diarrhea Dial, 2008 Nerd realizes that he has more work to do, and reviews the Revolution Interactive game, including at one point questioning why a game that is supposedly educational has a Blackjack mini-game. After 2023 Nerd finds no effect, 2008 Nerd changes his tune and realizes how much effort was put into the game, considering it was a DVD extra. 2023 Nerd turns the dial again, causing 2008 Nerd to change his tune again after he gets a Game Over.
- While reviewing Instruments of Chaos Starring Young Indiana Jones for the Sega Genesis, 2008 Nerd gets a message from Agent Rolf, saying nobody's name is Rolf.
- 2008 Nerd initially thinks the game is just average, but when 2023 Nerd adjusts the dial, 2008 Nerd says this makes the other games seem great.
- Indiana Jones can murder construction workers in this game, causing 2008 Nerd to ask what kind of hero is he?
- After discovering that he needs to bomb the gear box to proceed, 2008 Nerd points out that Indy bombs a bridge and kills people.2008 Nerd: I bet you weren't aware of his dark past. Wonder if that's canon?
- While playing the India stage, 2008 Nerd gets overwhelmed by multiple enemies attacking him at once. He says it's as if all the enemies in the stage were crammed into one spot, like they got smart and said, "Hey, let's gang up on him."
- 2008 Nerd sums up how it feels to get the Game Over screen, which consists of a message saying Indiana Jones is dead.2008 Nerd: Your beloved character has died, because you failed. That's it. The character is dead. Harrison Ford's never coming back to do another movie and it's. All! Your! Fault! Because you got hit by a combination of birds, snakes, flying knives, and a monkey hopped up on drugs!
- After failing to beat Instruments of Chaos, 2008 Nerd considers whipping it, but has something better in mind; just like the Thuggee in Temple of Doom, he has a Voodoo Doll of the cartridge, which he stabs with a toothpick, causing the cartridge to bleed.
- Thanks to 2023 Nerd's continued use of the dial, 2008 Nerd thinks The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles on NES is so bad that he clutches his chest in pain saying it's killing him, and he insists that it's actually killing him.
- It turns out that before 2023 Nerd turned the Diarrhea Dial, some of the shitty peripherals and games he played in the past used to be good; the Power Glove works perfectly, Batman Forever on SNES is amazing, and Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing is one of the best racing games he's ever played.
- As the 2008 Nerd is dying due to how bad the game is, he attempts to heal himself with the Holy Grail, but since it's a replica, it kills him instead, which in turn, causes 2023 Nerd to disappear.
A Boy And His Blob
- His rant about people stealing instruction manuals when renting games.
- He notes that the game bares similarities to a certain film where a boy befriends an alien who eats candy... Mac and Me.
Beating Jekyll & Hyde
- The older Nerd's arrival is a parody of the famous scene in The Exorcist with Father Merrin in front of the MacNeil house, but since he comes from the future, he arrives in a DeLorean.
- When the Nerd meets his 80 year old self, it sounds both humbling and egotistical how he greets him with "It's an honor."
- The older Nerd eats from a box of Nerds (the candy) as if it was medication.
- Upon seeing the ending where Jekyll finally gets married, the Nerd is absolutely delighted, saying he deserves this happy ending given the trouble he went through, even though he still showed up covered in bomb ashes and bird shit.
Final Fantasy 6
- Throughout the review, the Nerd calls the game Final Fantasy III, which is what it was called back when it was first released in the west. He acknowledges this.Nerd: The cartridge still says III, the title screen still says III, every time I play it it still says III, I've tried giving it the finger, telling it "Fuck you, you're wrong," but the game still says III. Fact.
- The Nerd tells the story of a time when he was working at a convenience store and a man suddenly divided up into four people.
- Santa appears and accidentally unplugs the game, causing the Nerd to lose all his progress. He proceeds to beat Santa up.
- Upon finally finishing the game, the Nerd gives a heartfelt statement that after 30 years, he finally finished a Final Fantasy game... But he has a notice about the franchise since then:Nerd: THERE'S SIXTEEN OF THEM!
