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The Computerisa Cheating Bastard
alt title(s): The AI Is A Cheating Bastard

"Cheat wherever you can. A.I.s are handicapped. They need to cheat from time to time if they're going to close the gap... Never get caught cheating. Nothing ruins the illusion of a good A.I. like seeing how they're cheating."
Jonny Ebert, lead designer of Dawn Of War 2 on video game A.I.

So you're playing a game - say a racing game. You've blown past all of your AI-controlled competition and are ahead by a good minute. You oversteer out on a turn. All of a sudden, the formerly distant AI cars zip past you! Surprise! The AI is a Cheating Bastard!

The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard whenever the "game world's rules" are different between you and the AI-controlled opponents. When used as a quick-and-dirty substitute for good game design, this becomes a method of adding Fake Difficulty to a game, sometimes leading to Luck Based Missions. On the other hand, until computers replace humans, it's unlikely AI will ever be able to challenge players on human terms. Older games fall victim to this trope more often, since hardware and AI capabilities have evolved over the years, but modern games are often Cheating Bastards too.

In Sinclair ZX-Spectrum forums such as news:comp.sys.sinclair, this phenomenon (real or imagined) is known as "cheatingbastness".

Some games have even used the fact that their AI is not a cheating bastard as a selling point. Conversely, arcade versions of games often cheat more, to increase sales.

Sometimes, the computer only cheats at higher difficulty levels. Particularly conscientious games even tell you so. These are often considered exceptions to the trope: The Computer is still Cheating, but not a Bastard, since you asked for it, the equivalent of differing handicap weights in thoroughbred horse racing.

The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard does not include "fair challenges" of the game (wide pits, powerful/numerous enemies, etc.); those are Real Difficulty. Likewise, one should not accuse the computer of cheating simply because it plays to a computer's natural strengths (lightning reflexes, comprehensive mastery of the game rules, and so forth), or because you have a single streak of bad luck. Consistent bad luck, however, may be a sign that the computer is using the RNG to cheat. Cheats that work to the player's advantage are a Rubberband AI or plain old cheat code.

Note that this is not a place to bitch about enemies that have skills you don't have, or bosses who have stronger skills than you, or about how unlucky you are and how many times you missed (unless the computer has a different chance of missing with the same skill), or about how hard a certain boss is, or how the computer is actually half decent at some of the game's more advanced maneuvers that you happen to suck at. This is only for scenarios where it would be expected for the player and the AI to be on even footing. For example, in the campaign of a strategy game, it would be natural for the computer to outnumber you and/or have more resources than you - that's part of the challenge of a campaign. However, in free battle or skirmish mode, a computer starting with more resources than you is usually cheating, since you would expect to be on even footing with the computer (unless you can set what everyone starts with).

See also: Fake Difficulty, Rubberband AI, Nintendo Hard, Random Number God

Note: Since The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard is so incredibly common, only egregious examples should be listed below, otherwise this entry would take over the entire wiki. Aversions or subversions should probably be left out as well, since that's (hopefully) the default.

Got examples? Take it to Troper Tales.

Subtropes:


Generic Examples:

Note: These are generic examples. They give ways the The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard trope manifests, not specific instances in specific games. See the "Specific Examples" section further down for case studies.

  • In Real Time Strategy and Turn Based Strategy games, the computer ...
  • In RPGs, the computer ...
  • In racing games, the computer ...
    • ... has an infinite supply of fuel or Nitro Boost.
    • ... has a car which has superior performance to anything you can drive.
    • ... will apply "realistic damage modeling" to player cars, but not AI cars.
    • ... possesses 'rubber band' capabilities, meaning second place will always be close enough to catch you.
    • ... will, especially in pre-4th generation console games, go to their full speed instantly.
    • ... will be exempt from rules by which a player is eliminated from a tournament.
    • ... will always get all the good positions on the starting grid, while you get stuck all the way in the back.
    • ... will team up against you, but never its own various NPC cars. The computer's interest is you. Losing.
    • ... will get a head start.
    • ... never makes a major crash on its own.
    • ... can turn on a dime
    • ... can brake faster than you can.
    • ... can pop out from under your front spoiler when overtaking, but block the entire width of the road for you.
  • In First Person Shooters, the computer ...
    • ... doesn't have to reload, or reloads instantly (assuming you do have to reload).
    • ... can aim for and shoot you without actually having to face you.
    • ... can shoot so far and so accurately that it can kill you before you can even see it.
    • ... starts with equipment you have to go find.
    • ... knows where movable objectives like the flags in capture-the-flag are, even if nobody on their team have seen them.
    • ... knows the state of weapons and power-ups at all times so it can go for them the instant they respawn.
    • ... has bullets which never drift or deviate, while yours seem to bend around the NP Cs.
    • ... has infinite ammo.
    • ... always knows your exact position, and can hunt you down/avoid you at all costs almost effortlessly.
    • ... can see through smoke grenades.
    • ... can see in the dark.
    • ... can see through obstacles/cover of any kind.
  • In Fighting Games, the computer ...
    • ... has unavoidable/unblockable attacks.
    • ... can use moves from impossible positions.
    • ... can move/attack faster than you.
    • ... can use attacks with magic priority to knock you out of even your fastest moves.
    • ... does any of this for Boss opponents.
    • ... will always know exactly where all invisible characters are - both its and yours.
    • ... can use its special attacks more frequently than you, and its Desperation Attack with more health than you.
    • ... can deal more damage when using the same character and the same attacks you use under the same circumstances.
    • ... can do combos that are impossible for the player.
    • ... can dizzy/stun the player more often than he is allowed to do the same.
    • ... can revive itself after you went through hell to beat it.
    • ... beats you with ONE move (usually when it's actually about to lose).
    • ... reads your controller inputs and counters you immediately, when a human would have to predict/react.
    • ... is impossible to fake out.
  • In action games in general ...
    • ... touching an enemy damages you but does nothing to the enemy.
    • ... you've got two sticks and a rock, but the computer has Bottomless Magazines.
  • In pretty much any game, the computer ...

Notable Offenders:

Note: Since The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard is so incredibly common, only egregious examples should be listed here, otherwise this entry would take over the entire wiki. Aversions or subversions should probably be left out as well, since that's (hopefully) the default.

    open/close all folders 

     Civilization 

     Final Fantasy Tactics 

     F-Zero GX 

     Mario Kart 

     Pokemon 

Specific Examples:

Note: Since The Computer Is A Cheating Bastard is so incredibly common, only egregious examples should be listed here, otherwise this entry would take over the entire wiki. Aversions or subversions should probably be left out as well, since that's (hopefully) the default.

     Fighting Game 

     Puzzle/Board Games 

     Racing 

     Role Playing Games 

     Shooters 

     Sports 

     Strategy 

     Other 

     Real Life 

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