Funny / Critical Role Scattered

Critical Role's funny moments
Campaign 1 (Vox Machina): 1-23 | 24-38 | 39-83 | 84-99 | 100-115
Campaign 2 (The Mighty Nein): 1-25 | 26-47 | 48-69 | 70-91 | 92-112 | 113-141
Campaign 3 (Bell's Hells): 1-22 | 23-38 | 39-51 | 52-64 | 65-80 | 81-
Critical Role One-Shots

As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.

Episode 52: Far From the Others

• As Chetney, Imogen, F.C.G. and Fearne have been abruptly transported from the sweltering Hellcatch Valley to the arctic around Uthodurn, they are immediately freezing their asses off. Imogen tries to tuck her hand into her Taste of Tal'dorei pot holder, only to remember she gave that to the gatekeeper in the Feywild. Instead, she wraps her hands in her "Whitestone is for Lovers" T-shirt.
• Aabria Iyengar, as Chetney's ex Deanna, wastes no opportunity to roast Chetney based on their past together - Travis is visibly and comically mortified for large portions of the episode. Careful observation of the two following her introduction, before her name is mentioned, will show the moment she points out Deanna's name on her character sheet to Travis, who pulls a great Double Take before looking at Aabria, who smugly nods.
  Aabria: (as Travis giggles uncomfortably) I told you I was coming for your ass.
  • Imogen telepathically messages Chetney and asks if he was doing okay. Chetney squeaks a terrified, "help".
• Using Wild Shape for the first time to fly, Ashley specifies that rather than go as a giant eagle, Fearne becomes a giant shoebill.
• During a fight with an ice lizard, FCG pulls what probably is his most absurd Spiritual Weapon to date.
  FCG: I was told to hit it with something hot, so I will make my Spiritual Weapon in the form of Nick Jonas!
  • And then Matt making Nick Jonas canon in the lore of Exandria.
  Matt: He's a historical bard who came from the College of the White Duke, 40 years ago, in Tal'Dorei.
• Deanna casually going into her backstory of how she was brutally killed and then brought back to life. FRIDA tells Deanna she doesn't have to talk if it makes her uncomfortable, but Fearne interjets and insists Deannae tell them about her past.
  Deanna: Got better.
• FRIDA checks in on Deanna to see how she's doing.
  Deanna: I. Am. Freaking out.
• Thanks to Fearne's Pass Without A Trace and a Rogue multiclass, FRIDA rolls a 39 for stealth.
  Christian: I am the night.
• As the party notices Imogen's Volcanic Veins are turning red at her hands, and are now reaching up to her ears, they decide to check if they have spread to her breasts.
  Imogen: I have lightning titties!
• As Deanna learns about Chetney's werewolf situation, Aabria rolls and says she "laughs in monster fucker".
• Though the Chetney vs FRIDA fight is pretty grim, it does have a couple gems.
  • Just the concept of a robot vs werewolf fight is pretty over the top and hilarious.
  Sam: Robot versus werewolf! This is high fantasy!
  • FCG casts Calm Emotions on Deanna when she prepares to go murder Chetney, and though it works, it does not change how she feels, so she calmly states she is going to rip out his spine and chew on it.
  • After the fight, Matt instructs Christian to roll a constitution saving throw for FRIDA. The result is not stated, but him putting his head in his hands while Laura jumps out of her chair is pretty telling. The cast then wonders how it would even be possible to have an aeormaton werewolf, suggesting it would be something like a robot dog toy.

Episode 53: Ripples

• Imogen, concerned about Chetney's loss of control, asks what if he'd ran into other travelers into the night, and he responds with typical Chetney bluntness.
  Chetney: They're fucking dead.
• The group tries to pose as scholars and the guard questions their credentials. Deanna gets heated and calls him "young man", and Matt describes the guard as an old looking dude.
• Deanna apparently misheard the group when they talked about the Apogee Solstice, as she refers to it as "Applebees Soulcycle".
• In the throne room is a giant bull creature, and Fearne attempts to call it over so she can pet it. The bull runs her over for massive damage. Fearne still wants to pet it.
• After the group manages to lead the bull out of the city, Chetney is still in the throne room, raiding it for all its worth. He even carves his initials on the wooden throne.
• Then as soldiers come in, Chetney had clawed himself to have a cover story ready, and starts wailing for medical treatment. The guard has no reason to not believe him.

Episode 54: Treacherous Toys

• The group get a hero's welcome for stopping the bull, but one dwarf grandmother side-eyes them and tells her grandchild it had to have been a conspiracy and the group actually brought the bull into the city. The table makes a "there it is" comment.
  Christian: (laughing) That's like my Puerto Rican grandmother.
• In Deanna's home, Chetney tries to suggest they sleep in the same room, with Deanna curtly telling him to sleep on the couch. She shares her room with Fearne and Imogen, with Ashley joking they were having a pillow fight.
• As Matt goes to declare they have a long rest, Sam conveniently times revealing his gas can to show a picture of apparently Matt at a Chuck E Cheeses. Then Sam takes off his jacket to reveal he got a shirt made with the same image. The table loses it as Matt threatens to kill the heal bot as revenge.
  Christian: Before you do whatever you're gonna do with him, allow me to leave the bedroom.
  [...]
  Travis: Some people get a full night's rest. Some people get five levels of exhaustion.
• The Hell's meet Oltgar's benefactor (and the one who drove the wedge between Chetney and Oltgar in the first place), Drixlich — and they immediately hate him. Imogen purposefully says his name wrong as "dick lick" and the others do whatever they can to stealthily antagonize him.
• Sam has trouble telling the difference between horizontal and vertical movement and Aabria exasperatedly mutters "Child actors..." The whole table bursts out laughing.
  Matt: Careful, that's half the cast.
  Aabria: I said what the fuck I said!
• Fearne manages to polymorph the giant spider monster in Drixlich's room into its grub form, a cute little squishy thing with huge eyes and a mouth; it tries to bite Imogen but just ends up tickling her instead of damaging her. Fearne suggests they leave the grub here so when Drixlich comes back in thirty minutes, that will be his problem.
• As the time for the polymorph is running out, Fearne dashes out of town, with on-lookers thinking she's carrying a baby. Ashley then decides to slide the baby down a cliff side (she descibres it as "plinko it down the cliff") and then immediately dashes back towards the gates once it reverts back to its original form and gives chase. The guards are momentarily stunned at this rapid series of events to say the least.
  Fearne: Open the gates! Open the gates! (gates begin to close) Faster, faster! Close it faster!
  • As it gets shot down by the guards, Matt jokes that it weakly calls Fearne "Mom?" before it gets absolutely annihilated.
  • The others quickly point out that the people of Uthodurn just witnessed one of their "heroes" run out of the city with a baby, and come back with no baby and a giant spider chasing her.
• Fearne's reaction to it all is very Fearne.
  Fearne: I'm a terrible person! (beat) I walk back inside the city.
• A version of Santa is now canon in the Critical Role lore.
• We get a new Running Gag when Fearne points out that the people who help maintain FRIDA could get Fresh modded with proper robot legs like he always wanted, and Fresh brings up how their monowheel could retract if needed. Unfortunately the appearance of a monowheel hanging between the legs looks like something else...
  Matt: We're gonna have to censor that.

Episode 55: Hope Within History

• The entire Robo Romance between F.C.G and F.R.I.D.A, while also heartwarming, triggers some incredible reactions.
  • When F.R.I.D.A. kissess F.C.G., F.C.G. leans into the kiss. Cue Laura miming them reciprocating with a lot of tongue.
    Matt: THERE'S NO TONGUE!
    Aabria: Matt, let him have his art.
  • As F.C.G is being opened up for a tune-up in Uthodurn's workshop, they ask F.R.I.D.A to look away. F.R.I.D.A responds by removing their face plate, which F.C.G immediately stops.
  • This exchange:
    Imogen: What happened?
    FCG: More than what happened with you and Pretty.
  • Deanna, Fearne and Imogen listen in on them through her house's "thin walls". Sam trolls them hard by making as many Innocent Innuendo as he can. Aabria says that whatever they're doing, in Deanna's head it's extremely graphic.
  • F.R.I.D.A asks to draw F.C.G, so Sam "poses like one of your French Aeormatons". Matt loses it.
• Deanna takes her sweater off, revealing that she's built "like a Pixar mom".
  Aabria: Tiny upper body, absolutely dump truck ass.
• Fearne plays Shipper on Deck for Chetney and Deanna in a very Fearne way: by telling Chetney that if he doesn't make a move on her, she will.
• In the morning, Deanna makes breakfast with goat milk-based gravy. While not that ridiculous, Ashley then declares that Fearne provided the goat milk. The table loses it, and Matt has to walk away for a moment.

Episode 56: By Goat or By Boat

• During the recap, Travis leads the entire table into doing the Taylor Swift screaming goat meme.
• Imogen gains two points of exhaustion due to the chill of an ongoing blizzard, owing to the fact that despite buying a new outfit she is still dressed for Marquesian weather, which naturally isn't suitable for the climate of northern Wildemount. Also, Laura's explanation for such a strange fashion choice?
  Laura: I learned from Mica that if you're dressed hot, you can't get cold.
  Aabria: That's the truth. Hoes don't get cold!
• With a successful Con save, Fearne simply shakes off the blizzard and is sitting comfortably with the goats. According to Sam, she is also drinking milk — while he is miming Fearne squirting milk in her mouth through udders in a way that is very NSFW.
  • And then you remember that Fearne's goat is called Donnie Boy.
  Travis: Donnie Boy comes over and he asks, "Would you like some—" (laughs hysterically)
  Aabria: Is Donnie Boy the goat from The VVitch? (yes, she pronounces it with two Vs) "Wouldst thou like the taste of butter?"
• Deanna starts getting curious about what's been going on between Fresh and FRIDA, whereupon Sam realises that Fresh has every right to suspect the same between Deanna and Chetney.
  Fresh: Are you gonna love 'im and leave 'im? Are you gonna... bed 'm and dead 'im?
  Aabria: One more!
  Fresh: Are you gonna... fuck 'im and chuck 'im?
  (mass meltdown ensues)
• In the lead up to the goat killing in the next part, Matt describes that the raft they end up building was too small for their goats to ride on the boats. Imogen thought they were smaller goats like the ones you see at the zoo. Matt has to empphasis three times they were Riding goats. Imogen clearly needs her non existant glasses.
• Black Comedy ensues when the party realize they have to fit their giant riding goats onto a river raft, and Deanna's immediate reaction is to kill her goat. Imogen screams while the others worry if Chetney is a bad influence. Fearne then casts Speak With Animals and talks to the rest...
  • Deanna quickly assures Imogen that this wasn't the worst thing she's seen with a casual smile.
  Imogen: (horror stricken) WHAT THE FUCK?!
  Deanna: (cutting up her goat with a smile) This isn't the worst thing you've seen. Your dreams are bad.
  • This leads into an argument in and out of character when Deanna brings up they need meat. Laura argued they never had to worry about it at Matt's table. Doubly funny when you consider they had two robots with them that do not need to eat.
    Donny Boy: What happened to Jerry? He exploded! Is that gonna happen to me? (Matt corpses) I don't wanna explode...
  • If you pay attention, Deanna's decision to kill Jerry was after Chenteny suggested to her that they share a goat.
• They decide to leave the goats behind, Fearne trying to explain what to do if they're not back in a certain amount of time, but stops herself because...
  Donny Boy: What's time?
• FCG casts Commune and talks to the Changebringer, finally getting some information from his rather elusive goddess. However, Matt describes the vision as having weird perspective with the goddess being impossibly far away, which FCG takes as proof that Exandria is flat.
• Deanna sees both FCG and FRIDA intentionally launching themselves and getting grappled by the monster, respectively, and concludes that she wasn’t being reductive when she thought aeormatons had a death wish and angrily yells at them to get back on the raft.
• The group decides to have Fearne ask the fish if there's any danger around, and go through some fairly extensive deliberation over whether Fearne should turn into a fish, if they should hold her in place while she's a fish, how they should grab her as a fish, and finally decide that Fearne will just stay as herself and stick her face in the water and gesture if she starts drowning. Fearne then sticks her head in the water, persuades a fish to come over, and immediately forgets what she was supposed to ask.
  • After finishing the conversation, the fish tries to swallow Fearne's arm, resulting in everyone screaming while she flings it off.
• Aabria reminds Travis to roll his d100 to see if he died of old age in his sleep. He doesn't, but she's briefly terrified that she may have gotten Chetney killed.
  Travis: Burch kills Taliesin, you kill me.
• While it's utterly horrifying, Matt's description of the elk monster in Molaesmyr crosses into Black Comedy as his explanation of the beast goes from it being weird but relatively normal for the setting, to fairly freaky, to some kind of Lovecraftian horror with too many legs and no face.

Episode 57: The Sorrow of Molaesmyr

• We get a new Running Gag again when the party has to fight ghosts, and Chetney fails a save and gets possessed by what appeared to be a teen girl ghost - which leads to Travis Speaking Like Totally Teen. And then we find out that he had to look up something called "Teen Slang for Parents" just to keep the act going.
  Sam: Did Chetney just become an influencer?!
  Aabria: This is all just AAVE right now, so I understand it perfectly.
  • The DM's later reaction to Chetney as an Aging Would-Be Hipster:
  Matt: I will kill your character.
  Aabria: I'll race you.
  • When he later tries to make "no cap" a Pre-Mortem One-Liner, we get a very rare instance of Matt outright refusing to accept a player's How Do You Want To Do This.
  Matt: You kill it. [...] That's what you get.

Episode 58: Escape from the Past

• The group ends up evading the Wolf King without any real confrontation and end up fully free of having to deal with it at all. As the break begins, Matt decides to show off his specially made, absolute monstrosity of a figure for the Wolf King, which didn't get used at all.
• While looking through Ludinus' abandoned belongings, the group discovers a cylinder of wood, which they immediately decide is a dildo, much to Matt's ire.
  Matt: It's about the thickness of a dime.
  Laura: Oh, so it's a pretty useless dildo.
  Matt: It's not a dildo!
  • Matt after tries to describe them finding a strange, leather harness meant for a person to wear. It's clearly meant to be an important artifact, but the party has some very strong issues taking it seriously after the dildo.
• F.C.G. decides to Identify the staff.
  Imogen: In the morning, can you Identify something else?
  F.R.I.D.A.: In the morning he'll be identifying my staff.
  (laughter and groans)
  Aabria: Just a really loud "HEYOOO!" from on top of the notes.
• Chetney, in a soft, gentle tone, comforts Deanna when she's panicking over F.R.I.D.A. possibly leaving, and tells her he made something for her. In that same gentle tone, he describes pulling the thing out of his ass.
  Chetney: It's been really uncomfortable.
• Deanna, Chetney, and Fearne threesome with Chetney in his wolf form. Enough said.
  Deanna: Really quick question, is the werewolf thing only for fighting?
  Chetney: I mean... There's only one way to find out. But I might recommend... not in the Savalirwood?
  • How Deanna ropes Fearne into the threesome.
    Deanna: (fake-scared) Help! Chetney's gone crazy! Someone, anyone! Preferably Fearne if you're down for that! Help!
    Fearne: What's going on out here?
    Deanna: Run, Chetney's gone crazy and the safeword is "parmesean!"
• While the threesome is going on, Laura jokes that Imogen is having a thumb war with herself, complete with miming.
• The morning after, Deanna and Fearne joke that Deanna might turn into a were-faun when Imogen asks if any of them were bit. Travis then rolls to see if Chetney survived the night, with the table joking this would have been the perfect way for Chetney to go. Travis then confirms Chetney is still alive.
• The whole bit about revealing what Chetney's tattoo meant. First he described how he made magical furniture, which explains chapter 1's fight, which was made for the Cerberus Assembly. Next he recalls he got kicked out of the Rexxentrum Toy Authority, which is what his RTA tattoo actually stands for ^note Travis previously annoyed Matt by having Chetney claim it says "recognize the alpha". FCG and Deanna call him him out the BS after realize he was part of a toy union, which Chetney tries and fails to justify himself. While this is going on, Matt initially looks like he's regretting his life choices before breaking out in laughter with the rest of the table.
  FCG: The Rexxentrum Toy Authority?! That's- That was just your JOB?!
  Chetney: Look, it's-... They're very strict about their union policies, okay! I was just trying to show loyalty!
  FCG: How many other people have that tattoo?! How many other people have that tattoo?!
  Chetney: (demurely) Couple dozen...
• Matt decides to leave the dice roll to decide what happens with the Staff of Dark Odyssey up to Laura, who has to roll a D100 and the only bad outcomes are if it rolls anywhere between one and five. They decide she'll roll while Matt looks over and keep the result secret until the next session. They do not reveal what Laura rolled, but after doing so she reacts very strongly and immediately covers her mouth. Laura would later reveal that she rolled a five on episode 13 of Four-Sided Dive.

Episode 59: Somewhere Out There

• Sam dresses up as Link as part of his ad promoting Tears of the Kingdom, but he's covered in bandages. He eventually reveals that it's because he had a bad allergic reaction to the makeup. He takes off the bandages covering his face to reveal that he's been done up in makeup to make it seem like he's in hives, and it's very realistic looking. Cast and viewers alike were immediately grossed out. He promised to go home, but kept coming into frame during everyone else's parts of the ad segment.
• During what's otherwise a very tense scene, Marisha is revealed to have taken over map duty from Travis.
  Marisha: I've got the maps now, bitch.
• Aimee Carrero bringing out her playtest character Deni$e was pretty much a Open Secret, which makes it funny at the meta level when Laudna (played by Marisha) joins in the backhanded insulting of Dariax (played by her husband!)
  • Deni$e's numerous tattoos include a stereotypical banner heart, except that "instead of Mom it says Me." You really have to wonder if Ashton or Taliesin is laughing the hardest at that. Even better, she has hoop earrings that actually say Fuck and Off, just like Ashton's weapon!
• Bor'Dor. He's an ordinary farmer who got teleported to the middle of nowhere and got nine levels of sorcerer overnight. His meek attitude and appearance—a dark-skinned, long black-haired half elf in a green cloak—raised immediate comparisons to Encanto's Bruno. He spends most of his time freaking out over things that the other characters are desensitized to.
  Liam: We've been travelling with the Ring girl for months! These guys are new!!
  • His reaction to Laudna's form of dread is to scream and vomit all over himself. He even ends up wetting himself at one point.
• The three Hells remember that they had accidentally left some dead bodies in the hole and start tossing them out. Marisah spends the next few minutes miming Laudna going through the corpses that Ashton tosses out. When Orym notices something trying to sneak up on them, he pushes one corpse back into the hole with his foot, which Ashton grumbles over.
  • It's worth noting that they're taking the bodies out in front of their new traveling companions, and find themselves having to awkwardly explain that these guys totally deserved it.
    Ashton: Sorry, it did not occur to me what this would look like from the outside, but it's gonna make the cheese smell weird if we don't deal with it now.
• When they first meet Bor'Dor he shoots a crossbow bolt towards Orym. He rolls so low the bolt just falls out pathetically. Bor'Dor then tries to run.
  • Mona attempts to sneak up on him, and Bor'Dor gets a bit Trigger-Happy as he shoots a fifth-level lightning bolt towards her direction and hits. Orym is struggling to settle this as peacefully as he can before they end up killing each other.
• Prism's introduction is her coming out of the woods and asking the three Hells, Mona and Bor'Dor if they have time to complete a short survey about their experience with the Apogee Solstice.
  • She was also supposed to conduct her survey in a populated city, so her biggest concern after turning up in the middle of nowhere is that it doesn't give her a sufficent sample size.
• The group decides to take Prism's survey, which asks for them all to give one interesting fact about themselves. Prism could do a backwalk up until she was 10 years old, Orym can still do a backwalk, Deni$e's nails are very sharp, Bor'Dor is just scared and wants to go home, Laudna was born with magic, and Ashton has a dimensional nexus of infinite personalities in a hole in their head.
  • Pâté's interesting fact about himself, true to form, is that he's quite horny. Liam's follow-up quip sounds like Orym was channeling Vax or Caleb! ^note Funnier if you know that "the little death/la petite mort" is euphemistic for a sexual release.
    Prism: Do you have a means of release?
    Pâté: I did once.
    Prism: That's just tragic.
    Liam: (in the background) Death is the ultimate form of release.
• Mona ends up outing her real name and then reveals her name is actually Deni$e. She later clarifies the "s" is spelt with a dollar sign, and the interface immediately changes to accommodate that. Then Prism decides that her own name is also spelled with a dollar sign. The interface does not change.
• The new group discuss their abilities, with Laudna saying she was born with magical gifts whereas Bor'Dor literally got his right after he was teleported. Prism is noticeably irate when the others ask if she was born with her magic as well.
  Laudna: Does magic happen to you too?
  Prism: No, (through gritted teeth) I studied real fucking hard to get it. It's like ten years of apprenticship!
• Bor'dor apparently has good hearing to listen to the very quiet sheep. Cue nearly everyone at the table doing the Taylor Swift screaming goat meme. Deja vu, anyone?
  Liam The Other team did goats. We can't do that bit.
• Deni$e telling Orym about how her ex-fiancé left her, and Orym slowly starts piecing the clues together. However, he's in such disbelief, he looks back and forth between himself and Deni$e while muttering, "No, can't be". After confirming that Deni$e was in fact the woman Dariax left, the two start talking about him.
  Orym: He likes making jokes.
  Deni$e: Not very good ones.
• Prism admits she named her raven mother because it would be funny yelling "mother" during combat.
• True to form, this team gets their own Running Gag when they have to deal with dead bodies inside their Hammerspace while also setting up camp, and one by one they suggest that they set up the dead bodies into a fake decoy camp, complete with magic enchantments animating them, meaning that they could potentially remain active till campaign 4. And then Prism suggests adding artifical magic voices, with Liam suggesting that one yells "I don't like it!" in a distinctive accent.

Episode 60: Faith or Famine

• Much like the Chroma Conclave being used as a theme for spa facilities, the Cerberus Assembly has apparently reached this point in popular culture.
  Prism: You don't understand, I have playing cards with each of their faces on them. (Beat) Eight playing cards. Trading is VERY limited. (whole table melts down)
• Prism gets...very excited by the arcane field generated by the leylines as they get closer.
  Matt: The rising amount of general arcana energy that suffuses the space around a leyline nexus, and as you begin to grow closer and closer to where this nexus is, the hair on your skin stands a little on end.
  Prism: But it feels like arcane magic?
  Matt: A little bit.
  Prism: I come a little bit. That's awesome.
• The new kids continue the glorious tradition of mangling Matt's names for NPCs—this time, a fellow named Proleff.
  Bor'Dor: Yeah, let's go find Prolapse.
  • The abovementioned Proleff is a storeowner NPC, which leads to the following:
  Matt: It's 1 gold per vial, all 6 went into one massive laxative...
  Marisha: (breaking) One massive laxative!
  Taliesin: It's a good band name, Massive Laxative...
  Emily: (bro voice) I got the shit kicked out of me in the mosh pit at Massive Laxative.
• Prism, in addition to being excited about arcane magic, is very desperate for a Scry spell.
  Prism: And I'm looking for a Scry spell that I could copy down. I'm willing to do dirty stuff—[breaks] wait, no, I meant like thieving.
  [The table breaks]
  Laudna: She's got a high price tag, though.
  Matt: Abbadina's brow curls up.
  Prism: I meant things that I would get yelled at. [breaks again]
  Marisha: It's not getting better.
  Deni$e: Listen, don't pay any attention to her. She's 12.
• When the term missionary comes up in discussing the temple, Marisha pulls a Laura.

Episode 61: Crisis of Faith

• The episode starts with some Ripped from the Headlines humor, and some Dramatic Irony, when Sam's new NordVPN routine involves calling out Matt for not using NordVPD, after his Twitter actually got hacked and used by someone to run a Macbook scam - which Sam demonstrates by bringing out several Macbooks he allegedly bought as a result. Then it bites Sam in the ass a different way, when he realises he'd been stacking the Macbooks on his own script, and trying to pull it free just tears it up.
• Liam succinctly describes how the last episode ended, "Peace was never an option".
• Prism calls for Dynios by referring to him as "daddy". Dynios is not pleased by this and objects to it as he flies into the building where Prism is. Marisha then adds this brilliance.
  Marisha: Wait, if he's leather bound, does that make him a leather daddy?
  Dynios: Obscene! Foul! I object to this!
• Caught in a paralysis trap, Deni$e can barely do a thing besides struggling and swearing like a sailor at her opponents.
  • When Orym gets trapped in one as well, Liam jokes he's just in a squat like pose and isn't even feeling the burn yet.
• Matt jokes one of the Dawn Father's followers has the words "Dawn Daddy" tattooed across their fingers.
• After managing to get some spells off, Prism quickly runs into a room to hide. She's later stuck there with a guard who swings at her. She manages to successfully dodge the first roll, but on her second she gets hit. Emily jokes Prism basically Matrix rolled into the next attack.
• In the middle of this climactic battle, all of the guards that Bor'Dor fed laxatives to last time fail their constitution saving throws, double over, and violently shit themselves. Bonus points for Emily for pointing out that they're all wearing heavy armor, which takes 10 minutes to remove.
• Bor'Dor manages to get a HDYWTDT and Orym snarks, "Where's your god now?" Bor'Dor belatedly wishes he could have dropped that cool line.
• Bor'Dor gets the second HDYWTDT on the angel, and does so by holding its face, kissing its forehead and whispering "Enough." Prism tries to do the same with her summoned barlgura to send it back to where it came from... and immediately gets punched in the face.
• During the night after the battle Bor'Dor goes to look for Orym... for some reason being pantless.
• As the group offer items for the scrying spell, Bor'Dor appears to have absolutely nothing that can allow him to see his home and brother. When he finally offers up his dagger, the spell shows a home that could be similar to Bor'Dor's home, but it isn't.
  Marisha: Bor'Dor basically camera ringed another home.
  • When Deni$e gets a scry, they see Dariax and Dorian beside him.
  Ashton: That bag of dicks!!
  Deni$e: The dwarf guy is your bag of dicks?
  Ashton: (pointing to Dorian) No! That's our bag of dicks!
• Matt waited till the end of the episode to summon the wind cougar eidolon, which proves to merely be the tip of the iceberg considering how many jokes they wring out of it next week.
  Aimee: Wind Cougar was my nickname...
  Emily: Because I like younger men and I pass a lot of gas!

Episode 62: A Long Walk of Reflection

• During the Ad read, Sam uses the cast to recreate famous memes. After trying to get Matt to do two unrelated memes, Matt flips out and with Sam's cat mask recreates the woman yelling at cat meme
• We get another Running Gag courtesy of the wind cougar eidolon, when all the guys start calling it names of a different sort of cougar - Fran Drescher, Jennifer Aniston, Teri Hatcher...
• Matt just realises the hole he dug himself into, when Laudna and Prism call up all their assist characters (Pate, Mother and Dynios) and Matt is acting as all of them plus the wind cougar.
  Taliesin: Emily, stop making one-shots.
  Matt: It's just me at the table at this point. I hate this.
• Laudna points out that Mother may be growing softer towards Pate, since she was at the very least acknowledging his presence.
• Bor'dor tries to find some berries to eat, and Matt has him roll a survival check. It's a 9, and Matt starts to describe the very delicious looking black berries he'd found, when Utkarsh interrupts and tells him he forgot to add his modifier, meaning his roll is actually a 15. Matt immediately pivots to describing the delicious looking blue berries Bor'dor had found, and how he'd skipped the black berries because they looked toxic.
  • Deni$e shows up right after with a rabbit she'd caught with her bare hands. When Prism points out that it's still whimpering, Deni$e just slams it on the ground until it stops.
  • Matt has Aimee roll for the quality of her rabbit, but rather than make a survival check, she instead chooses to make an animal handling check. Matt tells her that while survival is for hunting, animal handling implies she coaxed it over in a friendly manner and got it to crawl into her lap before snapping its neck.
    • Aimee's roll is a twelve. Marisha immediately theorizes that the rabbit was so easy to catch because it had rabies.
  • Liam is amused at the fact that all everyone wants to do is craft, hunt, and look for berries, and can tell they've all been playing video games over the weekend.
    Emily: I wanna put a rocket on a Korok!
• Ashton asks Orym to teach them to meditate. It goes about as well as you'd expect.
  Liam: Roll a wisdom save.
  Taliesin: Eleven.
  Liam: You start thinking of waffles.
  Ashton: I'm hungry.
• While experimenting with his new powers, Bor'dor casts Calm Emotions on Ashton. Ashton tells him that nothing happened... and then starts giggling at nothing. The others immediately conclude that they just gave Ashton the equivalent of Xanax.
  Ashton: I'm gonna go over here and think about rocks!
• The next night, Ashton offers Prism his tobacco pipe, and asks if she smokes. Prism tells him that she's a student, of course she smokes... and then starts sucking on the unlit pipe while holding it like a cigarette.
  Ashton: It won't work if you don't light it.
  Prism: Oh, what? I was eating it.
  • It turns out Ashton's pipe is actually magical, and the smoke Prism exhales shows her greatest achievement: making herself indispensible to a visiting mage so that when it was time for him to leave, he offered to take her with him to the Cobalt Soul, facilitating her escape from the Shadowfell. Taliesin immediately snarks that she spelling bee'd her way out of her hometown.
• Bor'dor tries to fish, but the only fish he manages to catch is so tiny it wouldn't even feed one person. He gets Prism to cast Enlarge on it, and the group enjoys a nice meal of fish, until the Enlarge spell runs out and they're all suddenly hungry again.
• Prism tries cast Ray of Frost into a cluster of crystal to see what happens, but she decribes it as casting very close to it so it's very quiet. The others joke that only a little noise comes out...like a little queef...in fact, since it's cold, it's a shivering queef. And once again, everyone at the table breaks it for several minutes.
  Liam: (through strained laughter) I'm only a little sorry but I am sorry!

Episode 63: A Haunted Past

• The fight against Bor'Dor and the reveal that he's part of the Ruby Vanguard is played for its suitable drama in-character. Unfortunately, out-of-character, Utkarsh still has some trouble navigating his character sheet.
  Marisha: (incredulous) You want my help as you try and assassinate me?
  • Emily is also endlessly amused by the image of Utkarsh having to read out Bor'Dor's backstory from his phone before attacking the rest of the party, as if that's what the character actually did in-game.
  Liam: (holding up a little notepad as if giving a speech) And in closing, I cast disintegrate.
• Matt points out that Bor'dor has the Polymorph spell, which he could use to escape.
  Utkarsh: I would like to turn into... a tree sloth. No, I'm joking.
  (everyone cracks up)
  Taliesin: Curses! Foiled the fuck again!
  Liam: (very slowly) Heeere I gooooo....
• As he's pinned down, Bor'dor begs Laudna to kill him... but also turn into the "creepy spider" while she does it.
  Aimee: "I wanna go into the most painful way possible."
  Liam: "Step on meeeee..."
• Out of the items they loot off of Bor'Dor, Prism decides to keep his hat of disguise... and making it look like she's wearing a second beret on top of the beret she was already wearing.
  Prism: (proudly) I'm going to do the thing that Orym wasn't brave enough to do! I look like an idiot and I don't care!
• Deni$e shows Orym his wanted poster, with Aimee presenting Liam a sticker of the wanted poster saying, "Have you seen my child Nancy?" Deni$e remarks that Orym does look quite cute, but asks why he's being called Nancy.
• Prism tries to decide where to go after choosing to leave the Cobalt Soul. She initially decides on Whitestone, then changes her mind to Marquet, then decides to go with "dealer's choice", letting the elf decide where to take them.
  Dynios: That is atrocious. What is wrong with you? But so be it!
  Prism: I'm wearing two hats and I don't give a shit!
• Prism scries on the other Hells to find out where they are so they can teleport there. Matt points out to her that it's good she scried now and not the previous night, or she would have seen something she probably would not have wanted to see (the threesome between Fearne, Deanna and Chetney).
• Emily thought Prism was going a different way than the Hells, so when she attempts to create a grand send off for herself, the table has to point out she's going the same direction as them.

Episode 64: Reunited

• Sam's gas can returns, this time with a diorama of F.C.G. "serving bundt", with an actual bundt cake on a platter attached. The problem is that when he first lifts it, the cake falls off and onto the floor, where it immediately disintegrates. Despite this he keeps offering pieces to Emily, who doesn't even want to touch it.
  Emily: I need you to put that in a garbage bag, tie it up, throw it into hell.
• Coming back from the bad roll in episode 58, Laura's dice rolls for a good part of the episode are terrible, prompting the rest of Team Wildemount to yell that she should roll better.
  • When Laura rolled again, for fun Travis rolled a d100. They both rolled a 4, freaking everyone out.
  • When Team Wildemount finally mangages to land their teleportation for the first time, which unfortunately is not anywhere near their intended destination, FRIDA comes out of if speaking Spanish and has to be hard reset by Deanna.
• Team Isslrya's return to Jrusar goes tits up immediately when Prism comes gliding past them - apparently the random world location Prism settled on to start her grand adventure is Marquet, where Jrusar is.
  • When Orym tries to snatch her back with Seedling, Emily asks if he can have advantage on the dexterity check because Prism "has a nice tush" for a target. Matt actually accepts this.
    • After being asked whether or not the Cobalt Soul puts all its members through an intensive boot camp^note Because the only other member the Bell's Hells met was Beau, and recalled she "had abs for days"., she later declares that Prism has an 8-pack, but that her strength score is negative because her arms are weak.
• The guys' best bet to figure out what happened is to ask the locals, and they end up with a passing-through courier. Naturally Laudna can't get over the immediate need to creep him out. Business as usual.
  • Also when Laudna expresses the opinion that all couriers are shifty, Liam asks if Marisha has some long held grudge against the post service, since it's something that's been happening since Campaign Two.
• The addition of three guest characters means there's ten people at the table, making things extremely cramped. Travis especially is almost falling out of frame the entire time.
  Marisha: When you tell the waiter that you have four friends who are joining and they're gonna be here in 10 minutes.
• As the groups reunite, Orym leaps over to hug Fearne. Matt points out Ashley had not said if Fearne is back in her faun form or was still the raccoon dog, which leads to a hilarious image of Orym tackling said creature and ecstatically hugging it.
  Aabria: You just find a random raccoon dog and you're like "This is my friend!"
• Deanna and Chetney tell the other half of Bells Hells they had a threesome. Imogen for some reason has to inform Laudna that she took no part in it.
• FRIDA is happy to meet Laudna as they say Imogen told them so much about her. So they play back one of Imogen's conversations about her describing Laudna as creepy but beautiful. Imogen immediately hides her face in her hands as she realizes what FRIDA was doing.
• Fearne tries to steal Ashton's hematite ring... while they're wearing it and trying to show it to the rest of the group. Somehow, despite Ashton having advantage on his Perception check, she succeeds. The result of this is Ashton trying to show off his new ring, seeing that his hand is suddenly empty, and staring at Fearne until she gives it back.
  Ashton: I missed you too.
• Prism decides to give F.C.G. a cigarette, which he pretends to smoke for the rest of the session. Pretends to, because a) he doesn't breathe and therefore can't inhale, and b) Prism never actually lit it, she just used a Light cantrip to make it look like it was lit.
  • As this scene plays out, Ashton tries in vain to stop F.C.G., then gives up and just silently facepalms. Deanna sees this reaction and the two immediately share a moment to commiserate over being their respective aeormaton's Cloudcuckoolander's Minder.
    Deanna: We don't have time, but we're best friends.
    Ashton: I feel like I finally understand you a little better.
• The genius move of seating Emily Axford next to Sam Riegel results in some of the most chaotic energy yet seen on Critical Role.
  • Sam's gas can gag is a poster of F.C.G.'s new art with Serving Bundt written across it, unfortunately the accompanying bundt cake fell on the floor as he brought it up to the table and for the rest of the episode both Emily and Laura react with disgust whenever Sam tries to offer it to anyone.
  • F.C.G. unfortunately meets Mother. She immediately takes to attacking him and F.C.G. trying to swat her away.
  F.C.G.: It's like Shithead all over again.
  • As part of trying to get F.C.G. to trust her, Prism offers him one of her cigarettes, which she unfortunately can not light as the Light spell can't actually ignite anything. Later, Emily as Prism decides to give F.C.G. the whole pack in part because Christian had such a negative reaction to F.C.G. smoking.
  • When it comes time to part ways, F.C.G. makes Prism promise that they will bring FRIDA back to him when all is said in done. Prism agrees, but in return makes F.C.G. promise to bring back their new best friend...Orym, much to the bewilderment of Laudna and Ashton, who suddenly decide to lean in on their conversation. Laudna even makes a point in emphasizing how closely she and Prism had become, because they had killed Bor'Dor together. Meanwhile Ashley, in character as Fearne, makes a hilariously affronted face at Prism's assertion.
    • The background to this moment, which Emily revealed on 4-Sided Dive, makes it even funnier. She had Prism declare Orym was her new best friend, just because she thought it'd be the funniest option: he's the only one who wouldn't have been mad at not being picked.
• Several conversations during this episode actually take place telepathetically, which as Liam points out would look absolutely bizzare to an outside observer.
• As Prism is saying a heartfelt goodbye to Ashton, Sam/F.C.G. slowly reaches over with a piece of bundt cake.
  Prism: You taught me how to have fun. So I'm gonna go keep— get that shit away from me.
• As a parting gift from Prism, she casts enlarge on Orym until he's about 6'6" because that's how she sees him, metaphorically. With his new height Orym immediately starts doing pullups in the rafters.
  Deanna: It's funny, when he's bigger, this feels douche-y.
  Ashton: It got smug.