What Did I Do to Deserve This, My Lord?, formerly known as Holy Invasion of Privacy, Badman! What Did I Do to Deserve This? is a dungeon defense sim/puzzle game by Acquire (Published by Nippon Ichi America in the US) for the PlayStation Portable.
What's an Evil Overlord to do? You just want to be left alone with your schemes to take over the world, but those pesky heroes keep attacking! There's only one answer: Spawn an army of bad guys to defend your home!
The game differs from other "defense" type games, in that it's more of an ecology sim: You dig through nutrient-filled ground to create "slimemosses", which then distribute more nutrients throughout your dungeon, allowing you to create omnoms (which eat slimemosses) and lizardmen (which eat omnoms and lay eggs), etc.etc. etc.
The game is also notable for its sense of humour, with plenty of Lampshade Hanging, ridiculousness and funny profiles.
A sequel was released for download and UMD in spring 2010. There's a third one, for $10.00 on PSN, under the title No Heroes Allowed! And then there is No Heroes Allowed: No Puzzles Either! for the PlayStation Vita, which is a puzzle game variant that is free to play, though small payments are required to increase inventory room and play more frequently per day.
This series provides examples of:
- Acrofatic/Kevlard: This is the Giant-class monsters' gimmick — They're big, they're fat, and they've got lots of extra HP.
- Anti Poop-Socking: No Puzzles Either! gives you Pickaxes, which are consumed upon entering a level. The first five are free (plus the three daily), but after that, Pickaxes have an eight-hour cooldown before you can get one, up to three per day. Of course, this can be remedied with cold hard cash.
- Cannibalism Superpower: Giant, fat monsters are able to slurp each other up to feed themselves if necessary.
- Blob Monster: Slimemosses, but like real-life slime molds, they can turn into blossoms to reproduce.
- Bribing Your Way to Victory: No Puzzles Either!. It's possible to beat the whole game without paying a dime, though considering how gloriously hard the game gets, you might be wishing you had more Pickaxes.
- Classic Cheat Code: L R L R L R L R L R features in every single installment of the series, generally used to unlock more levels.
- Damage-Sponge Boss: Every Boss Hero in No Puzzles Either!'s Hard Mode. They're still the exact same levels and have the exact same HP as in the normal scenario, except the damage your monsters deal to them is reduced to only a fraction of what they would normally take, which leads to a lot of losses.
- Defeat Means Enslavement/Eaten: In No Puzzles Either!, Heroes your monsters defeat in a dungeon may be captured and subsequently worked to death in your Mines or consumed by your monsters for levels.
- Disc-One Nuke: If you can manage to create a Dragon very early into one stage, and feed it enough, it'll be strong enough to destroy a hero on its own. The nutrients it gets will cause it to give birth to a stronger Black Dragon, and when it kills the next hero or group of heroes, it can keep upgrading to stronger and stronger versions of the dragon, right up to the deadly Shin Dragon, which is practically indestructible.
- Distaff Counterpart: Badmella for Badman. She first appears in a DLC story in the second game.
- Distressed Dude: Badman is helpless from kidnapping heroes without his god actively creating creatures to save his arse.
- Elaborate Underground Base: The entirety of the gameplay is digging this out. Where you dig is what matters.
- Embedded Precursor: The disc version of the second game allows you to unlock the first game by entering a code. (The same code used to unlock Hard Mode in the first game, no less) On the digital version or any European version of the game, entering the code just gets you a humorous rant from Badman.
- Encyclopedia Exposita: Contains humorous descriptions of many of the monsters and heroes.Her life hasn't exactly been all peaches and cream. Just days before she left her poverty-stricken town, her house burned down, her horse ran away, her cat died, she lost her favorite pair of shoes, and she stepped in a cow pie with her second favorite pair of shoes. But you know what Brad says, "Be content with the cards you're delt. *awkward stare* *nod* *lazy turn*"
- Evil Overlord: Badman, aka "Overlord"
- Evil Minions
- Evolutionary Levels: Present in most iterations of the game, though it resembles proper evolution better than other examples. Monsters will upgrade themselves in response to being killed, either by heroes, predation or starvation. The surviving members of a race, when under pressure, will adapt into forms that are better protected against however they died.
- The puzzle game simplifies this system into evolving a match of three or more monster tiles into a single tile of the next tier of monster. Monsters with stars on their tiles may also evolve into higher ranked monsters of the same class by feeding them a certain kind of Hero. The kind of Hero you need depends on the monster, but the game never really tells you anyway.
- Food Chain of Evil: Managing this is one of the big challenges of the game. Slimes roll around redistributing nutrients and occasionally blossom into flowers to reproduce. Omnoms (caterpillar things) eat the slimes, go into cocoons, turn into deadly killer moths and hunt more slimes to plop out omnoms. Lizardmen eat omnoms and lay eggs in a nest. Demons and dragons can eat Lizardmen (or heroes).
- Hold the Line: The objective. You're not able to take offensive action of any kind...which means if those dumb heroes didn't invade your netherworld, you'd never be able to take over the surface.
- I Know Mortal Kombat: The second hero, Chimli's profile says they know all their moves from "mangas and animes" and his weapon is a "video game replica"
- Law of Chromatic Superiority: The red skeletons are more powerful because they are red. Also the speed holes.
- Lizard Folk: Among the strongest of your troops.
- Luck-Based Mission: You're not going to be able to control much more than the shape of the tunnels you dig out. Everything else is up to the monsters.
- Man-Eating Plant: One of the late-game evolutions for slimes turns them into rampaging Rafflesia, flowers that can hold their own against heroes by eating them.
- Nintendo Hard: This game can be surprisingly hard for first time players. The tutorials help, but you still find yourself trying to figure out a good enough path in order to create some of the higher-level magical monsters.
- No Puzzles Either!'s Hard Mode. If you somehow managed to scrape by the final Hero and jump into Hard Mode straight away, you will see Badman get dragged off a lot as the game continuously humiliates you by kicking your maxed out monsters' butts with low level Heroes.
- Old Save Bonus:
- Uploading clear data from the first game into the second allows some of the heroes to make return appearances.
- The third game unlocks special picks with their own unique powers if you load up a save file from a completed version of the first and second game.
- Precision F-Strike: While mostly avoiding swearwords, the almanac entry for Rafflesias mentions the phrase, "That which we call a Rafflesia, by any other name, would still smell like shit." (And they do!)
- Pure Is Not Good: Well, Pure is Good, actually, but it's no good for you. Monsters that are under a lot of stress (but not quite enough to force evolution) will often give birth to "Pure" versions of themselves. Pure monsters are weak because they're too nice, and they don't reproduce—they're just a big waste of your time. The third game also introduces holy water which can turn your monsters pure.
- Reference Overdosed: The hero descriptions in the almanac are a hurricane of references to other media, though sometimes veiled properly enough you won't immediately recognize them.
- Retraux: The game has a distinctive 8-bit-to-early-16-bit style.
- RPG Elements: No Puzzles Allowed! throws these in via a monster fusion system where you feed your minions other monsters, Loot, or Heroes to level them up and boost their Attack. How your monsters are leveled affects your winning chances in the game itself.
- Shout-Out: The (original) title sounds like a very familar phrase, but we just can't think why...
- Simulation Game: Not as wide or long as some, but the game is based on sim elements more than strategy or RPG elements.
- Stylistic Suck: Everything's all blocky, in the vein of Half-Minute Hero or 3D Dot Game Heroes.
- The Last of These Is Not Like the Others: No Puzzles Either! is a fast-paced match-three game bearing elements from the series.
- Truly Single Parent: Monsters do not need to copulate to produce more of themselves. Even Lizardmen are able to lay eggs; the almanac for the second game even calls them "The single fathers of the Netherworld."
- Underground Monkey: Parodied with the Palette Swap upgraded units: You can upgrade from Slimemoss to "American Slimemoss", Lizardman to "Lizard Mage" and "Lizard Geisha", etc.
- Weak, but Skilled: The other main mutation monsters can undergo besides Acrofatic is this. "Abnormal" monsters have low HP and very low defense, so they die easily, but they inflict status ailments on heroes which work wonders against armored ones, and reproduce rapidly.
- Your Princess Is in Another Castle!: Badman 2 apparently ends this way after clearing Area 5. After an incredibly long stage, you've finally managed to take out the single most powerful hero in the game. There's a credit sequence and everything, and Badman walks the earth in a parade...then you may find yourself realizing there was still a lot of room left on the Almanac for heroes, and right during the credit sequence, Badman's castle gets bombed and the credits glitch out. Cue a devastated and exhausted Badman saying that now you have to re-conquer his own castle in three more stages.