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Video Game / Evony

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Readers are encouraged to avoid this game entirely. It is a spyware program in disguise.
Play now, my lord!

Evony is a Browser Game MMORPG where you start off in charge of a tiny village and presumably build it up into a mighty kingdom. It's best known as the source of those annoying banner ads with the random, mostly-naked women that you see on LiveJournal and FanFiction.Net (and, for that matter, TV Tropes).

The game has a strong social element. You are advised to join an Alliance, who can support you in war, can't attack you, and can communicate with you via chat. Alliances are composed of the Host, who is formally in charge of the alliance and has the power to dissolve it if necessary; the Vice Host, who is second in command and has the power to boot members; the Presbyters, who function as diplomats and can form alliances with other alliances; Officers, who serve as recruitment for the alliance and have only powers of recruitment; and finally Members, who have no special powers. As for those mostly-naked women, they won't be appearing.


The Evony developers have now launched a sequel, named Tynon. It uses the same advertising strategy. It's safe to assume it's also rife with spyware. Evony: The King's Return does not use sex in its advertisements, instead advertising it as a "pull the pin" puzzle game, but the puzzles are only present for the first few levels.

Again, readers are encouraged to avoid this game entirely. It is a spyware program in disguise.


This game, which should be avoided entirely as it is a spyware program in disguise, provides examples of:

  • Big Brother Is Watching: A game design student reverse engineered Evony's client, and discovered not only is it very poorly made, but it harvests massive amounts of data, including such things as your browser history, which websites you visit while the game is open, and what applications you run.
  • "Blind Idiot" Translation: At first, anyway, although as translation errors are reported by the playerbase it's been getting steadily better and better. It was still clearly written by someone for whom English is a twentieth language, though.
  • Bribing Your Way to Victory: You can buy in-game coins with real money, which allow you to purchase resources and helpful items. Can be a real Game-Breaker if you're willing to pay enough, but it's not cheap. Sadly for the human race, enough people are willing to shell out hundreds of dollars to make the game pretty much pointless if you don't spend money yourself.
  • The Cavalry: You will be very glad of your allies when they come to bail you out. Build relief stations to make the most of this, especially if you're a long way away from your allies.
  • Covers Always Lie: Ad Campaigns Always Lie in this case. Evony's entire marketing campaign is false advertising.
    • One ad did show a Civilization-like game. Granted, like nearly all of Evony's ads, this one also had a woman in the foreground.
    • Another ad has the slogan advertising for Evony II: "No more bullies! No need to farm! Free Forever!" Really? So what about Evony I?
    • Not quite a lie, but none too credible at all: one Evony ad boasts that someone (ostensibly, at first, a critic) claimed that Evony is the greatest MMORPG he'd ever played. The quote is attributed to, in much smaller font, an Evony player. His username was given, but no real name or credentials apart from "Evony player".
    • Another one on Facebook shows a screenshot from Counter Strike: Source, and has the title "Level 2 is impossible!"
      • There's another on Facebook with Gengar saying "Can you beat level 3?"
      • And another with art stolen directly from a DeviantArt user. Busted.
      • Still another used a (surprisingly tame) Crane courtier from Legend of the Five Rings without authorization.
    • Thankfully, later ads return toward a more traditional route.
  • Easy Communication: A particularly blatant example with how fast mail can reach other players. Consider that you're role-playing lords in a medieval setting. Averted, in how long armies take to reach distant destinations.
  • Lady Not-Appearing-in-This-Game: Evony game advertisments frequently feature scantily-clad women that do not appear in the actual game.
  • One-Word Title
  • Sex Sells: The game's (in)famous ad campaign showing increasingly unclothed pictures of women who don't appear in the game. Usually these ads will try as hard as they possibly can to make it look like a pornographic game. It's actually a clone of Chinese browser game Kingory, a Civilization ripoff where you build and fight ancient cities. These ads progressed from being standard pictures of armored warriors and the like (you know, things the game actually contains), then showed a woman with a sword pointing into her cleavage with the caption "Save your queen!". After that it just got worse and worse. it got to the point that they didn't even bother putting the name of the game on some ads; Evony had become so infamous for using softcore porn as ads, they could afford to assume that people who see these ads would know it was an ad for Evony. The same notoriety has led to a lot of parodies (web-based card game Alteil had "She is actually in our game, m'lord!", for example) from similar games and webcomics. And when your ads look like this (NSFW), when your actual game is a Civilization clone, there's something wrong.
  • Tactical Rock–Paper–Scissors: Though it's a bit more complicated than just matching up units, other units support each other in odd ways due to the range stat.
  • Tamer and Chaster: The still-misleading ads for The King's Return features little to no scantily clad women and more endorsements from A-list celebrities, and puzzles.
  • Zerg Rush: Due to unbalanced countering and bad AI, this is the preferred method. But never with cavalry, unless that's all you're sending — they're the dumbest cavalry ever coded and will set off every single trap in their way. The typical zerg rush with cavs entails sending a legion of footmen with some ballista backup, going to sleep, waking up, then firing off hundreds of thousands of horses.

Once more, in case you missed it, readers are encouraged to avoid this game entirely. It is a spyware program in disguise.