Funny / Sequinox

Arc 1: Scorpio

001: Sequinox Sequence Pt. 1

• The episode starts with Jake describing the new arc as “wet and wild”, which leads to a conversation on how a) things being described as anything wet is terrible, and b) how Jake describes almost anything he likes as wet.
  • Gets a callback when Caiden accidentally says the photo he took of the girls is for his "personal collection".
  Cassidy: This is where the wet and wild I was promised comes in!
• Syd does her eyeliner with a knife, which is both metal and terrifyingly stupid.
• Tellie takes on different forms when it appears to each girl. For Chell it's a fox wearing sunglasses and with bikini tan lines.
• When Caiden takes the girls' picture, Hannah tries to get out because she doesn't want to be seen with three losers, and Syd turns into a cryptid-style blur.
• Chell and Yuki try to invite Syd out for milkshakes.
  Yuki: Do you like milkshakes?
  Syd: Uh, is the Pope Catholic?
  Chell: Is he? *pulls out phone to check*
  Yuki: *shoves Chell's phone back in her pocket* Yes. Yes he is.
• Syd's Suspiciously Specific Denial about previously living in a city in a state that exists.
• Syd pulls a knife on Tellie as soon as it appears.
  Syd: No sudden movements!
  Tellie: I'm a fox! All my movements are sudden!
• After Tellie appears, Caiden tells the girls they're not allowed to have a cat in his family's diner, so the girls blame it on Syd being new. Syd isn't having it though.
  Syd: Hey, do I come in to your house and tell you where to put your animals? I don't!
  Caiden: But…you are in my place of employment…
• Syd and Hannah tell Tellie that it looks like a cereal mascot, despite it's protests that it serves an ancient and powerful deity.

002: Sequinox Sequence Pt. 2

• When Cassidy and Shannon hang out, apparently they either win Emmies or shut down Pokemon tournaments.
• The episode begins with Jake declaring that his southern accent for Chell is the best. Alan vehemently disagrees but Shannon and Cassidy are on his side.
  Alan: It was like being boiled alive in vitriol.
  Shannon: There are two other southerners here, and we have Emmies, and we have a southern accent, so I'm just saying…
  Cassidy: It was so good that my southern accent started to come out.
• Alan excitedly describes Yuki's Transformation Sequence, but neglects to mention she's wearing a shirt. He gets met by a chorus of “No shirt, titties out!”
  Shannon: It's the real way to fight as a woman!
• Chell finds it disrespectful that Earth is the last planet that the stars targeted, even though if they had done it earlier they likely would've destroyed everything.
• Spring and Antares are both wielding whips, but Spring isn't as experienced.
  Josh: It's my first day with a whip.
  Jake:You should've shown up with a nay-nay. Thank you! I'll be here all week!
  Josh: Like the song!
  Jake: Podcast is over, thank you. Josh had to shoot it in it's crib. It was a baby infant joke, and Josh smothered it with a pillow. Congratulations Josh, the baby joke smotherer.
  Josh: *Evil Laugh* I'm the villain!
  Jake: I'm glad you got whipped.
• One Scorpie that gives the group continued trouble due to either high-powered attacks or dodging all of theirs eventually gets named Kevin by the players, who decide that he's a Punch-Clock Villain and try to finish the fight without killing him. They fail, but he gets mentioned several times throughout the story much to Chell's chagrin.
• Antares declares that she doesn't know how to count because numbers don't exist in space. This dumbfounds everyone.
• Thanks to Hannah's last attack, Antares is still covered in pollen when she returns to space.
  Shannon: All the other stars now have allergies, good job.
  Hannah: I did it! I ruined space!
  • They then state that Spring's pollen is magic and disappears after a few minutes, unless for story reasons or pettiness.
  Hannah: Oh, I can be petty with the best of them.
  Chell: I'm the best of them.
• When the group tries to give Tellie a snack, it avoids the food and eats the plate. Thus begins the wonderful saga of Tellie eating anything but food.
  • This gets a call back when Tellie tells the girls it took a bite out of someone's car, and they remember Caiden wrecking his car in an earlier episode.
• The Stinger is the end of an apparently excited conversation between the five about cheese before they started the episode proper. When Jake prompts Josh to start the episode he calls it “the Cheese Kids Table”.

003: Between a Rock and a Hard Place Pt. 1

• The preamble this time involves the five of them making fun of the Soundtrack Dissonance on Sailor Moon's previously on segments, which usually involves happy music playing over scenes of death and destruction.
• Any time Chell goes out of her way to antagonize Hannah by making her hang out with “unpopular” kids.
• Chell believes that all street signs and traffic laws are just suggestions. As she tells this to her passengers, Yuki (who does not enter Chell's car unless forced to) has a sudden extrasensory moment where she's glad she walked to school that day.
• Josh asking about Hannah's gym clothes.
  Josh: On a scale of 1-10, how good do the pants make my butt look?
  Shannon: 10, it's a fantasy world.
• When Hannah hears that Chell is going to be one team captain for dodgeball, she demands that Harmony make her the other captain while declaring “NON-NEGOTIABLE!”
• Chell trying to assuage Yuki's fears that they're going to die.
  Syd: That's just Plan B. We gotta have a Plan A.
  Chell: Plan B, die violently. Plan A, win!
  Hannah: Can't that be something closer than Plan O or Q?
  Syd: Plan Q, die violently.
• Chell demanding to be able to hit Sargas with a chair, despite her actual magical powers being far more effective. Though to be fair she does manage to smack him around a little with it.
• Summer and Autumn awkwardly introduce themselves to Sargas, much to his surprise. Winter tries to say her In the Name of the Moon speech before Spring interrupts her. Then Summer wonders if Yuki's reading it off of her app, since she can't find it in hers. Then Sargas cordially allows them to check their apps for a few minutes, commenting he doesn't mind waiting since he's an ageless undying star. So Summer decides to stab him to test that theory. Sargas keeps talking, saying how it's nice to be humanized once in a while. And the whole while Autumn is being just as polite to him.

004: Between a Rock and a Hard Place Pt. 2

• Shannon states some character notes for Sargas: he has a nice garden, likes ice cream and the colour orange, and his strengths are his thighs and hair.
• The girls come up with a plan to freeze Sargas, then weaken him with fire, and then shatter him using Autumn's powers. Vivaldi awkwardly points out that they never retreated and Sargas probably heard the entire plan.
  Syd: Hey burly man, did you hear any of that?
  Sargas: Uh, yeah. I'm a magic space rock.
  Syd: Shit.
  Hannah: Do you think it'll work?
  Sargas: Uh, I don't think so?
  • Then they realize that nobody has the proper stats to pull a combination attack off.
  Jake: We got points when we started but we blew it on hitting people!
  • When they try to come up with a new plan they still haven't moved, so Vivaldi awkwardly asks if he should just start playing louder to drown them out.
• When trying to figure out how to get Tellie out of the school without attracting unwanted attention (already a difficult task after the fight since they were missing for most of it their friends are looking for them), Tellie just runs down the hall shouting “I'm a talking fox! Don't look at me!”
  • It then realizes all the stuff it could eat in the school, and the girls realize Vivaldi had a good reason for telling it not to come into the building unless necessary.
• Yuki and Chell get into an argument about the latter's driving skills. Chell argues that she must be fine because someone gave her a license. Yuki straight-up asks if that person was drunk.

005: First Strike Pt. 1

• The previously on segment gets derailed into the possibility that, if the team had followed Syd's plan to go in the vents, they would've ran into Vivaldi and become a human centipede. Alan is suitably disturbed.
• Spring starts the episode covered in Scorpie goo after a fight. Winter, offers to freeze it off, then suggests Summer wash it off with her Misirlou Beach Blast. Summer agrees and does that before Spring can say anything, leading to the latter getting soaked through and her hair getting ruined.
• Vivaldi announces that he has an idea to contact Tellie quicker. Syd asks if it's just teaching it to use a phone, but Vivaldi points out that Tellie would probably eat it.
  • Vivaldi desperately trying to explain his idea while the four girls continuously derail the conversation, and after a good five minutes Winter asks if he's going to explain.
  Vivaldi: I'm trying real hard to…
  • And Alan points out that these are the kind of shenanigans he has to deal with all the time.
• Tellie doesn't like being summoned by the girls…until they promise to give it treats when it does.
• Syd tells the group that she's never been to a fall festival, and that the only festivals they had in her old town was if they survived the winter. Shannon starts wondering if Syd comes from some sort of Mad Max-esque alternate world.
• Jake starts wondering if Chell can use her Sequinox magic to transform her car into a magical girl too, which leads to the mental image of all the Scorpies and the Star wondering where the girls are before they crash through them in Chell's 2003 Pontiac Firefly with a magical girl ribbon on its rear bumper.
• Shannon almost says "car things" because she forgot the word for roads, and Allen starts hyperventilating. "I think I made him spring a leak."
• Tellie finally explains that the reason it always eats trash and inanimate objects is that its cleaning up the Earth. When Hannah asks why it ate her dress then, Tellie answers that it was trash.
• Yuki puts Tellie in her bag so that it can come to the Festival with them without attracting unwanted attention. Whenever it manages to stick its head out, Yuki slowly pushes it back in while Tellie gives a tiny-yet-dramatic little “noooo!”. And whines about them being more boring than Vivaldi, who it refers to as “the bird”.
• Syd tells Yuki and Tellie that she knows how to throw and read chicken bones to tell fortunes. Tellie asks if she could do the same thing with a whole chicken, and Syd considers it.
  Tellie: I feel like it would be mean to take bones from chickens.
  Syd: I mean, they don't need them where they're going.
  Chell: Where we're going, we don't need bones!
• Yuki buys little glass sculptures for all the girls, including a bee for Hannah. Chell asks if it's because she's a pain in the ass.
• When Alan talks about getting apple cider with whipped cream and crushed up red hots at Dollywood, Jake and Shannon agree that he should be arrested for food crimes. Though Jake does admit that the all-seeing all-knowing Dolly Parton is allowed to do anything she wants.
  • Cassidy says that she's from the area, and Josh asks if she's from Dollywood itself. Cassidy tells him she was born on the roller coaster.
• The girls come across a group of children playing Sequinox. One of them, who turns out to be Caiden's sister Gel, is clearly Spring on account of she's beating the other three with a stick. Hannah declares that that means she's winning.
  • Second place goes to Fall, who is just straight-up punching her friends.

006: First Strike, Pt. 2

• The episode opens with the group talking about the festivals they've been to, and Cassidy complains that the one from her hometown no longer sells fried possum. Shannon asks her what cartoon world she comes from. Alan and Jake haven't had that, but they have had three-squirrel pie.
• In contrast to Antares, Tellie does know numbers. There are at least five.

007: Inferno Pt. 1

• Syd's mom is suspicious that her daughter knows exactly how to dispose of a broken fire alarm and considers talking to her teachers about her behaviour. Syd replies that they'd never believe her, which her mother accepts.
• Mrs. Diaz dresses as The Predator for Halloween, and ends up giving Yuki a Jump Scare.
• Shannon says that Tellie is dressed as a hotdog for Halloween, causing Alan to screech in delight.
• Syd's first plan for figuring out Vivaldi's secret identity is to get Tellie to bite him really hard so that the wound shows up. Her second one is to start killing people, and when Vivaldi doesn't show up they'll know who it is.
  • After the group hears Caiden's mom complain of a smoke alarm going off in the morning, which also happened to the four girls on the team, Syd jumps to the completely wrong conclusion: the Stars have taken over a fire alarm factory and sabotaged the fire alarms. Which are also Westbrook's main export.
  Tellie: That sounds fake and I'm from space.
• Caiden dresses as Peter Parker for Halloween. His little sister Gel dresses up as the Green Goblin. Everyone's a little concerned.
  • Gel also has a carton of eggs with her, claiming they're part of her costume. While Chell and Yuki tell her that if she does anything untoward she's on her own, by Syd encourages her to cause chaos.
• In this episode we discover that the one food Tellie will eat is Tootsie Rolls. When Hannah gets worried about Tellie having sugar in it, it cheerfully announces that it doesn't have organs.
• Despite the group being hidden behind a fence, Syd insists on transforming in a dog house to keep her identity a secret.

008: Inferno Pt. 2

• After Yuki and Hannah are killed, Syd begins to tear up. Cassidy states that despite the knives, she has a soft and nougaty centre. And if things keep going badly, everyone might get to see it.
• Jake insists that Chell didn't kill Syd, Syd was killed with Chel!
• Shannon again forgets a word (snowflakes) and calls them “things from the sky”.
• When the girls see Gaia's Staff form before them, they get ready to get back into the fight.
  Yuki: Together, guys?
  Chell: Let's do it!
  Syd: We've got nothing else to do I guess.
  Chell: That's the spirit!
  Tellie: I mean unless you guys wanna hang up here?
  Chell: Aw, but we look so pretty though.
  Syd: Heaven sounds boring though. I'm ready to fuck shit up.
• When they return to the battlefield and see their bodies have disappeared, but Caiden's is still there, Syd declares that he didn't get to go to heaven because he wasn't good enough.
• Shannon accidentally says “last but least” instead of “last but not least” when talking about Chell. Cassidy jokes it's because she murdered Syd.
• Yuki has a bit of a Heroic BSoD after dying and coming back. The others just want her to relax.
  Chell: You're allowed to repress for, like, a minute.
  Caiden: Yeah. We're processing it, then we're gonna repress it, and then we'll pretend everything's normal!
  Yuki: You realize how unhealthy that is?
  Syd: You know what else is unhealthy? Dyin'.
• As Shannon describes a scene with Harmony, she accidentally says that a few of her dads are there. The others immediately take this and run with it, declaring Harmony to be a dad collector.
• Hannah points out that, because she was hanging out with the other three this year, she's lost a lot of popular friends.
  Chell: Listen, the only reason y'all lost friends...is because you're very off-putting.

Bonus Comics

• Baby Harmony's terrible twos.
• Baby Caiden was a very messy boy.
• Harmony losing teeth: “I'm done with these”.
• Harmony's first day of school, which she has scheduled down to the minute (including the heartfelt moments).
• Caroline teaching Ethan how to drive.

Filler 001: In the Meantime

• Shannon's notes on Ethan's character sheet she tweeted prior to this episode.
• The filler episode features Sequinox going to each member's house to discuss their plans for fighting future constellations, only to declare that each house is a bad idea due to the antics of their families each time. What's more, the decision to go to someone else's house happens faster and faster each time, to the point where when they get to Hannah's house she just declares that she's not letting anybody from that group inside and they drive straight to the next one.
• The girls try to figure out what powers other constellations could have, and decide that Perseus will be easy because it's “just a guy”.
  Hannah: Pisces is…a fish.
  Chell: But it's double fish nunchucks!

Arc 2: Gemini

009: The Flip of a Coin

• Westbrook is helping fund repairs on the city by turning some of the battle-sights into tourist traps.
• The girls note that the Thanksgiving Day Parade is extra thankful this year considering everyone is still alive after the monster attacks.
  • There's also a slightly-singed sign in the park reading "days since last monster attack".
• When Shannon mentions that the Thanksgiving parade features a spot for the public school as well as Vertumnus, Hannah boos them.
• When discussing the high school obsession with sports teams, Cassidy mentions her high school not having any sports teams because to compete with other schools would be un-Christianly.
• When the girls start going off on a tangent, Shannon announces that Ethan has tearaway pants to reveal 80s gym shorts underneath. This gets things back on track.
• Harmony explains that her father Charles told the rest of her family not to show up for Thanksgiving. It's not because of the monster attacks on the town, but because he and his husband don't feel like hosting anything this year.
• Chell asks if Sid is part of any clubs, such as "knife club" or "murder journalism club".
• When discussing if anyone has been having weird dreams, Alan mentions that whenever Yuki has a remotely strange dream she sends a novel's worth of texts to Caiden. Conversely, Caiden dreamt that he fought zombies with Rosa from Brooklyn 99, and Chell dreamt about building a go-cart under water.
• After confirming that Gemini can't see them, Chell immediately calls over to her to get her attention.
• Then Gemini snaps her fingers and turns the team into cowgirls.
  Yuki: What in tarnation happened to us?
  Hannah: Did you just say "what in tarnation"?
  Yuki: I didn't mean to it just came out!
  Sid: Yuki y'all gotta warn us before you say that!
  • Vivaldi's violin has been replaced with a banjo.
  • And Alan's sign off is in a southern accent.
• In the stinger the dream conversation continues, with Cassidy talking about one where her sister's boyfriend finally moved to America only to reveal that he'd been a skeleton this entire time. And then he got a part in a musical.

010: Wild Wild Westbrook

• In the Previously on…, Jake states that the most important part of the last episode was Ethan tearing off his pants.
  Jake: I've read the Vivaldi comic, I know what his butt looks like.
  Shannon: I had to break a tangent, okay!
  Jake: No it's totally fair, but side effect: that butt tho!
  • For that matter, Jake’s description of the actual buckwild ending: "a giant woman became two less giant women and clapped us into cowboy times!"
• Alan points out that Cowboy!Vivaldi has a decent Southern accent, with Jake and Josh claiming that he sounds just as good as Chell does (to Alan's Chagrin).
• Chell claims they must be in a different dimension, since in the cowboy world everyone sounds normal.
• The girls first encounter with Southern Kindness, courtesy of Cowboy!Vivaldi, after they stumble around a few too many times.
  Vivaldi: Bless your hearts.
  Chell (aside): That's not good.
  Sid: That wasn"t one of the good "bless your hearts".
  Hannah: It sounded nice?
  Chell: That's the trick!
• Sid, covered in stardust-blood after a violent Gemmie beatdown, declaring that she feels much better than before.
  Vivaldi: That girls cheese, I wanna say it slid off her cracker, but I don't think it was ever on it.
• When they get clapped to Pop Idol! World, the whole team fail their rolls horribly and start to break their instruments, to the point that Pollux and Castor end this segment prematurely out of pity.
• In the Tuxedo and Martini Spy dimension, Vivalid is the Bond Girl and is only wearing skimpy blue swimming trunks during their girls' time there.
  • Vivaldi informs Autumn that her pen is a bomb that she can set by clicking it twice. Cassidy gleefully declares that she has Foley and begins clicking a pen on her end.
  • When they come across Pollux and Castor, Castor remains relatively unchanged, but Pollux has simply turned herself into a stuffed kitten for Castor to hold.
• In the 50s themed Greaser world, the girls summon their weapons by doing the hand jive. Spring gets a jump rope, Summer has a flaming butterfly knife. Sid ends up using a switchblade that she's just had on her the whole time, because she's Sid.
• At some point during this episode, Sid realizes that Castor and Pollux send them to other dimensions by clapping their hands together. So she starts trying to convince the rest of the team that they need to steal their hands.

011: The Trouble With Dames

• In the previously on segment, describing Sisqo's guest-appearance from the song "Wild Wild West".
  Shannon: He does all the high-pithced screeching at the end of the song.
  Jake: Every rap song needs some good high-pitched screeching. Just some good owl-yells.
  • It also has Alan trying to describe Namor as "the king of abs-lantis".
• When Sid reminds the team of her plan to take Gemini's hands:
  Yuki: Oh, I forgot when we had the giant conversation on how to get away with murder.
  Shannon: I mean...that's every conversation with Sid.
  • When the Yuki deduces that they're in a world where they gave themselves in to the Sky Queen, the other three immediately jump to the conclusion that they must've eaten Tellie.
  Hannah: I knew I felt full!
• Figuring that Castor and Pollux clap them into other worlds whenever they get to comfortable in one, they decide that their best plan is to annoy the two into doing so. Which they're great at.
• When they finally land back in their dimension (as far as they know) and agree to Caiden's plan to check if Gemini's gone to the parade, Caiden jokes that they might still be in another dimension because they're listening to him for once. Of course, this just sets off their Paranoia Fuel even more.
• Because she's so stressed, Chell starts Acting Unnatural, and doesn't understand why.
  Chell: Yuki is this just you all the time?! This is terrible!
  Yuki: Yes Chell, this is what I live with. This is anxiety.
• After they discover their Zords in the Sentai world, they joke that Vivaldi doesn't have one because he still wrecked it by crashing into Tellie.
• After getting clapped into a 1940s world where all the colours are washed out, Sid declares that colours weren't invented until the sixties.
  • When describing their outfits, Shannon tells Hannah she's dressed like her job is to have dead husbands.
  • Shannon tells them that they don't have to be smoking if they don't want to. Alan, Jake, and Josh all state their characters aren't. Cassidy has Sid pull out a fancy cigarette case…filled with candy cigarettes. Josh then decides that Hannah has a fancy cigarette lighter, but just as a prop.
  • Sid's over-the-top transatlantic accent.

012:...Is That Dames Are Trouble

• Upon realizing that Elena is essentially The Chief from Carmen Sandiego, the group tries to figure out how that could happen despite her being a chef. The many possibilities suggested are "food cops", "she's in the FDA", "she's a chopped judge", and "Kitchen Nightmares with Elena".
• After a very dramatic sequence where we see Ethan being held for ransom by his abusive father and the girls witnessing Gemini become darkly protective of Propus, we get whiplashed to a circus world and Chell immediately getting launched out of a cannon.
• Another world they land in is based on Mad Max, but when they see Harmony her car is perfectly clean and immaculate.
  • Shannon lets there be a turbo button in the car after Jake insists that, in his heart of hearts, he knows Chell would install one. She says it's underneath one of the dash buttons and just has "yes" written on it.
• In the mermaid world: "What is water but wet air?"
• The girls discover a variety of changes in the post-apocalyptic world at the end, from Hannah being pregnant, to Chell being covered in scars, to Sid having an eyepatch. Except when Sid checks, she realizes it's fake.

013: Yeah, I'm Thinking We're Back

• Cassidy asks if they can go to a Team Sonic Racing world, and then starts singing the theme song with Alan. Shannon rebuttals by suggesting a Sonic world where he has no shoes instead—then one-ups herself by suggesting a Sonic fetish world instead.
  • Cassidy later excitedly asks Shannon to throw out her existing plans and take them to a Santa Claus world. Shannon replies that her plans are already in shambles, so Cassidy presses her to "patch it up with some Santa Claus".
• Sid is momentarily afraid of knives, since in the circus world she was getting them thrown at her.
  Chell: Which knives are you gonna trust more, a stranger's knives or your knives?
  • They decide Tellie had to have been throwing the knives, with Josh saying Tellie couldn't have been a lion since no one was a lion tamer. Shannon bemoans missing such a good image and asks Gemini if they can go back because they thought of a better joke.
• When talking about Yuki having issues with being scared easily and being a superhero, Cassidy suggests Scoobie and Shaggy as people who are scared but still fight crimes. It devolves into Jake and Josh trying to figure out which one was on drugs.
• After deducing that they're around 22 in one world, Sid immediately demands to go drinking before they leave. Sh then appoints Hannah the designated driver.
  • Also in this world, Hannah remembers to use everyone's codename...only to be told by this Vivaldi that they no longer bother with them.
  • Sid tries to pass of the girls' awkwardness as "sympathetic pregnancy brain" from Hannah. Sid's mom Jenny thinks there's something else going on.
  Jenny: You're not pulling a John Woo today are you? I swear to god.
  Sid: No...
  Jenny: We're still finding doves, and I just don't want that to happen again.
  Sid: Never!...Love you mom. No more...doves.

  • The John Woo incident was Sid trying to bring a bunch of doves into the bunker just to see if she could. She's also tried to bring in skeletons and bones. Repeatedly.
  • Caiden tries to figure out what kind of world the girls came from by asking what their outfits looked like, and Sid draws him a picture. It's terrible. Caiden puts it on the fridge.
  • Chell's brother learned Korean to suck up to Sungjin. Unfortunately, Sungjin is super chill and doesn't need much to win over, whereas Elena now loathes him forever for not speaking Italian.

014: All Around the World

• Cassidy googles "easy skateboarding tricks for babies", then immediately complains that they all look lame.
• When a Screen Shake occurs in the 70s sci-fi show world, Hannah doesn't realize what's going on at first and takes a minute to start moving.
• Vivaldi explains that the computers are personalized to each member. Chell summons her weapon by pressing "1", because regardless of the dimension she never would've tried something more complicated.
• In the RPG world, Jake mishear's Spring's "crown of flowers" as "crown of flesh".
  Shannon: Just a bunch of teeth and ears, it's beautiful.
  Alan: Wait, Solvin's here?
  Shannon: Leave him alone he's doing great!
  • After Shannon describes Caiden's bard outfit, Josh comments that he sounds spoony. Jake complains that he didn't get a chance to make the joke first.
  • While searching for the Stars:
  Alan: Yuki is keeping her eyes and ears open for danger.
  Jake: Chell ain't!
• After transforming in the gothic monster world, and finding that they are the monsters:
  Sid: Chell, is this what it feels like to be you all the time? Just, like, really beefy and tall?
  Chell: Yes.
  Sid: It's pretty rad.
• In the stinger we get to hear Cassidy just making a chicken noise when they announce that they're recording.

015: The Monsters at the End of this Book

• In the previously on, Cassidy realizes that the difference between the "main" universe and the others is that they're all a little dumber.
• Jake describing the ending of the last episode:
  Jake: So we're like "okay, cool, we'll transform and be the heroes this city deserves", and then Oops! All berries, we're the monsters.
• Realizing that Monster!Caiden didn't want to transform because he becomes a Phantom and gets scarred on his face, the group determines that out of all the Caidens they've disappointed across the multiverse, this Caiden is the most disappointed.
  • Hannah pointing out the obvious way for her to sneak to the evil castle.
  Hannah: If nobody can see me, am I really naked?
  Everyone: Yes.
  • Vampire!Ethan says that he doesn't drink any liquids.
  Sid: Do you drink wine?
  Ethan: No.
  Sid: Well you answered that wrong...
  • Hannah confuses Let the Right One In with the Hokey Pokey.
  Hannah (singing): You let the right one in, you let the right one out...
  • Ethan explains that he recently moved to America from "Vaguely Europe".
  • Vampire!Ethan is much more mature than the girls' Ethan, so they determine that all the latter needs is a few more hundred years to bake.
  • While talking to Harmony in the castle.
  Shannon: You hear a knock at the door.
  Sid (casually): Oh the mob's here! Wait. Do mobs knock?
  • Anthony knocks on the door to the castle, and is greeted by the four monster girls. He takes it surprisingly well.
  Summer: You seem like you're in a little bit of shock but in like a cool, fun way.
  • Upon hearing that a pair of weirdo-twins have shown up in town recently:
  Autumn: Twins are actually Satan-babies, so we are here to fix that!

  • Then Summer quickly points out that Anthony's kids are probably not Satan-babies. Anthony responds "eh, they're okay".
  • Facing the new twin stars.
  Spring: If we can just break their hands...
  Autumn: Get their hands! Get their hands! Get their hands!
  
Spring: I mean break them apart, not smash them with a hammer or something.
  Autumn: Fine, I guess.
• After getting clapped to the next world, the team find themselves in the middle of an 80s high school prom. Yuki squees, Sid lets out an anguished moan because she's not a werewolf anymore, and Josh asks what Hannah's wearing.
  • Gemmies begin appearing in the crowd, but nobody notices because it's the 80s and somebody probably spiked the punch anyways.
  Autumn: It's only a matter of time before someone starts making out with a Gemmy.
  Summer: Yuki.
  Winter: Hey! Kevin was a special case.
  • Then they dance-battle them.

016: On the Flower Road

• After the cliffhanger of the previous episode, Josh figures that Gemini, who was the principal in the 80s Prom world, sent the team to the Detention Dimension.
• The team lands in a Sitcom World, complete with canned laughter and a title sequence that they are fully aware of.
  • During said opening titles, Yuki panics when she sees her full name displayed and tries to hide it.
  • The supporting credits continue after the theme song, still visible to the Sequinox girls. Jake comments that Tellie should be voiced by Keanu Reeves.
  • When Caiden asks the girls why they’re transformed, they don’t even bother with pretence and Yuki cries out “we have lost control of our bodies!”
  • While the credits are still rolling, Alan suggests that one of them is "Created by Shannon Manor".
  Autumn: Who is this?!
  Winter: She sounds really cool!
• In a pro wrestling world, Chell attacks Castor and Pollux who are in the audience, leaving Caiden to whimper "I don't think that's in the rules..."
• After they land in a world themed after Venice Carnivale (where everyone is wearing feathered masks):
  Autumn: We will never find Caiden here. Okay guys! We don't have him for this one—
  Vivaldi (offscreen): No, I'm here!
  Summer and Spring together: Who said that?!
  • Chell then lifts up the mask of a random stranger to check, but it’s Castor, who immediately claps them away.
• When Tellie asks Chell what wrestling is.
  Chell: I'm gonna pop on some wrestlin'! There’s an NXT takeover comin' up, we'll watch that together.
  Tellie: Yes! I'll eat it.
  Chell: Uh...we'll cross that bridge when we get there...can Tellie eat a television program?
  Sid: Just the concept?
  Tellie: I can eat a television.
  Chell: Yeah...
  Tellie: Actually I've never tried, but now I want to.
  Hannah: I believe in you Tellie!
  Tellie: I believe in me too.
  Yuki: Chell she's staying at your house next, right?
  Chell: Yeah no, definitely going back to Caiden.
  • The girls get caught up in trying to figure out how parades actually work, wondering where floats go when they're not being used and who plans them, and Chell asks how Macy plans her parade. As in, Macy, singular, and Macy's Day Parade is a day parade just for Macy.
• In the stinger, the group discusses plans for if things go wrong: die again to get the Gaia Spear.

017: Split Decisions

• The opening devolves into Cassidy and Shannon talking about their childhood crushes on Pinhead, much to Jake's confusion.
  Cassidy: I was like "who is Pinhead", and I looked him up, and I'm like "this makes sense".
  Shannon: This is why me and Cassidy are friends, because she understands me.
  Cassidy: Okay look at him, he's got this whole—a tight leather top—
  Jake: I've seen Pinhead and I think a lot of things, but “flay me daddy” is not one of them.
  • There's also Alan mentioning that he was afraid of Richard Simmons as a child.
• While trying to determine if they're in the right universe finally, Caiden suggests asking them questions about him that only they would know, then quickly realizes that they really don't know much about him.
• During the fight, Gemini stretches herself out like silly putty and smushes herself onto people.
  Shannon: She can make herself hard or make herself soft. And I just realized that's not a good sentence.
  Cassidy: So can lots of us!
• Caiden misses a defence roll while fighting Gemini, and everyone mutters "oh not again". He’s fine, but still.
• Spring is able to pull Frank out of Gemini, but just casually chucks him out. Vivaldi mutters that he should've just stopped playing so that Spring failed the roll.
• After the fight, the team telling Vivaldi everything they've had to deal with.
  Vivaldi: You punched a kid?!
  Spring: It was an evil kid!
  Autumn: It was a bad kid, you would've punched him too.
• Charles grabs Tellie to force Sequinox to tell him what's going on. When Chell tells him, he just hands the dog back because after everything he's seen, that's still too weird for him to handle.
• Sid texting her mom after the attack.
  Sid: hey prepare for influx at the hospital. gonna get wild!
  Shannon: Just text her "I'm not dead" and never respond again?
  Cassidy: And she'll be like "fair enough. At least she lets me know now."
  Jake: She just texts back "k".
  Shannon: "New phone, who dis?"
• Despite getting stuck inside Gemini for an extended length of time, Sungjin is fine. His response to these events is basically "this was weird. Maybe I'll paint about it?"
• Chell gleefully showing Caiden the picture she took of Evil!Vivaldi.
  Chell: But I do wanna show you as evil 'cuz I just wanna denote the abs you got goin' on here and the very tight leather pants!
  Yuki: And again—sleeves, but no shirt!
  Hannah: Very tight. There's no secrets in those pants.
  Caiden:...why are you saying abs like that's the part that's made up?
  Chell: I appreciate a good ab. Game recognize game!
  • While she shows all these pictures to him she comments that she's not sure how she got some of them, like selfies from the mermaid world and from the Gothic world.
  Chell: I took a weird selfie with a broach?
  • When Chell shows Caiden pictures of Pregnant!Future!Hannah, he suggests showing them to Ethan since he knows the situation now.
• While the girls explaining that they’re basically the worst at being Sequinox in the multiverse.
  Caiden: There's an evil world?!
  Sid: Yeah but they were very good at it.
  Hannah: Super efficient!

Filler 002: Fun and Games

• Josh levelled up Hannah's friendship with Tellie to 2, which means it won't eat her stuff as much. Shannon realizes that Tellie's friendship with Caiden is at 3 and it still eats his stuff, so who knows.
  Jake: Once you hit level three it's so familiar with you that it starts eating your stuff again.
• Shannon says they don't have to worry about new attack details until the proper arc begins because this is just filler—unless of course they just go extremely off the rails. Jake points out that statistically they're most likely to fight Harmony, much to Alan and Shannon's chagrin.
• Chell tries to keep her cool while talking to Charles about Sequinox and how he had to have blood work done on him because he was stuck inside an alien.
  Chell: Oh...bummer?
• Chell gets her multiverses mixed up and calls Marcus a tree because he called himself that in one of the more mundane ones.
• Charles double-checks that Chell being called "Chell" is alright and not harassment. Chell explains it's something she's trying out, and this way she can tell sooner when her mom is giving her a Full-Name Ultimatum and she can "jump out a window".
  Charles: Well, I'm just going to pretend that's part of youth culture.
• Hannah recounting what she's been threw over the past few months.
  Hannah: I died, I was pregnant, I was a fish...
• Hannah puts on a "Boy, Bye" sweater before she leaves, and Josh spends the next five minutes googling said sweaters to see which one he likes most.
• Yuki's mom tells Yuki to say hi to her new boyfriend, much to Chell and Hannah's shock. Despite Yuki's efforts to explain that he's just a friend who happens to go to the same therapist, Chell immediately begins razzing her. Then it turns out the person Mrs. Fuyutama is talking about is Ethan. Chell doubles down, Hannah is about to lose it.
  • It turns out Yuki's mom refers to all of Yuki's friends as "her girlfriend" or "her boyfriend" until proven otherwise.
• Sid is trying to imitate her future self's look by shaving her head, on account of she can't get rid of an eye. Jake points out that she could since Future-Sid wasn't missing an eye, she just had a fake eyepatch.
  Cassidy: She's not gonna bother with any therapy, but she's gonna shave her head and hope has the same effect.
• The three pull up and try to knock on Sid's door so they can see inside her house, but Sid beats them to the punch and jumps out the window.
  Sid: Look, you're not ready yet.
  Chell: Sid, what is inside that house that y'all don't want us to see? It's driving me crazy!
  Hannah: We've seen so many things, I think we can handle your house!
  Sid: You can't. Nobody can.
  Chell: We literally went to a Dracula house!
  Yuki: Well, I mean, respect privacy y'all?
  Chell: Never! Not once!
  Cassidy: Privacy: Not Even Once!
• When the four end up at an impromptu family reunion at the Park household.
  Cassidy: Sid's gonna look for snacks. Are there snacks out?
  Shannon: There's an Italian grandmother in the kitchen. You are going to get fed.
• Sungjin high on painkillers.
  Chell: You're on the good stuff, huh?
  Sungjin: Oh fuck yeah! Oops, sorry. They gave me the good shit. Dammit!
• Caiden and Chell ended up wearing the same outfit. He tries to escape the house before the family notices, but in his rush almost takes a baby he was holding with him.
  • As they're running out the door, Sid quickly says some stuff to the grandmother in Italian.
  Caiden: Oh shit, you know Italian?
  Sid: No.

  • To be fair, Sid is very sincere in the Italian-sounding gibberish she says.
  • The family notices anyway and starts loudly joking and laughing about it as the team tries to escape.
• Chell on carnival food:
  Chell: There's definitely some nasty sausage there that I am super-excited to get down on.
  Yuki: Just the way you say that is...not great.
• Alan drops the term "Dragon's Blood Snowcone" and throws everyone for a loop, Shannon because she's trying to keep the fair a normal Northeastern fall fair and Jake because he refuses to accept Dragon's Blood as an actual thing that exists.
• At the mention of a haunted house, Sid gets so excited that she makes a noise Caiden describes as "her soul leaving her body so it could go to the haunted house".
  Sid: It did! Which means we gotta go back and get it!
• Hannah sleeps through the whole haunted house ride. She tries to go around a second time for a longer nap, but Chell drags her off to get food.
• As the team sees Ethan in the distance and Yuki explains why everyone's making fun of her, she points out that her mom called Caiden her boyfriend too. Caiden doesn't react—he already knew because Mrs. Fuyutama told him to his face. Yuki almost flies off the handle.
• Chell tosses Ethan a peach because she'd heard that he'd never had a peach before. He misinterprets the gesture horribly. Yuki, Sid, and Caiden dip because they can't handle how awkward things are.
• The newest theory on  Sid's secret backstory: she's just a bunch of wolves in a trench coat.
• The girls joke that everything at the carnival, from the prizes to the food, was made in the mid-90s.
  Hannah: If you win at ring toss, you get a pair of JNCOs!
  Chell: I could make two skirts out of one of those...probably four skirts...probably seven skirts...
• Once the girls tell Ethan the deal with being Sequinox, he tries to guess who's who. He knows Hannah is Spring because she's the tallest. Chell is aghast.
  • Ethan also briefly thinks Sid is winter. Sid looks at him deadpan while wearing a pumpkin shirt and asks him to think about it a bit longer.
  Ethan: Wait, then what's Caiden? There's no fifth season?
  Chell: Toyota Truck Month.
  Ethan:...he did have a truck...
• Chell tries to exit the house of mirrors on her own but gets lost.
  Chell (in the distance): There's like nine of me! One of them is short and it's really upsettin'!

Arc 3: Virgo

018: Some Strings Attached

• They joke at the beginning that one day a Star is gonna show up in the filler arc and the girls will kick it out.
  Alan: This is our time!
  Shannon: Time doesn’t exist in space either.
• Chell is offended that Hannah rides to school with Ethan now that the two are official. Hannah just likes being able to relax on the drive there.
• When Shannon mentions the Winter Formal is coming up, Sid jokingly thinks that she can't go because she has a crush on every boy.
  Josh: I didn't know we were back to Yuki.
  Jake: Got 'em!
  Alan: Well it’s boys and girls.
  Shannon: I was gonna say, don't be rude. It's everyone.
• On top of people waiting for the next Star to show, the town is anxious for the first snowfall.
  Shannon: The sky goes a little grey and everyone just goes still for a minute.
  Jake: Yet nobody buys a shovel until it’s too late, New Hampshire.
• When Chell accidentally goes to Hannah’s house before remembering she's with Ethan, she has to turn around. It's described as still fast, but sad. After she picks everyone up she ends up getting in a text argument with Hannah. While driving.
  Yuki: Do not text and drive!
  Chell: It's talk and text Yuki, chill out!
  Caiden: Just tell Siri to message for you.
  Chell: I'm an expert at this.
  Caiden: I mean you're not, we've all been in this car with you.
  Chell: Excuse you! *runs a red light*
  • Hannah ends up getting the whole conversation because the phone picks everything up.
• A line of foot soldiers was prepared to stop Chell while she was driving, but because Chell was completely turned around when she came up to them nobody saw until she just drove through them.
• Chell and Sid are in favour of ramming into the foot soldiers with the car, but Yuki and Caiden are firmly against it.
  Caiden: Can we please not Hobbs & Shaw this? I don't wanna die. Or if I do I want the Rock to be there so I know it's a good death.
• Chell forgets the "Activate!" part of the transformation call because she's rusty.
• Caiden is so awkward and shy that he would rather sit on his own than join the others sitting with new kid Verrill.
  Chell: Where are you going to sit?
  Caiden: I've had no friends before, I can do it again.
• The girls introduce Verrill to Ethan, telling him that he's on the football team...though no one is sure what position he is, or what any of the positions do.
• Chell points out the last time they had a new kid was Sid.
  Chell:...who's house we can't go to because there’s dead bodies?
  Sid: *doesn't react, continues carving runes into the lunch table*
• When Verrill excuses himself and Caiden comes over, Chell immediately asks him if he thinks Verrill is cute.
  • After he returns and Caiden scurries away, the team explains his situation by saying that they’re his only friends and only because they bullied him into hanging out with him. Which is mostly true!
• Chell has a fear of large dolls and puppets, but she’s fine with regular-sized ones. “I could kick Chucky a football field and a half if I wanted to.” Which leads to a discussion about how Hannah has only seen the reboot, and how Tellie is too young to watch those movies (even if they insist that they would just eat Chucky).
  Chell: Anyway Tellie we’re almost at the diner so you gotta go silent.
  Tellie: Like a doll!
  Hannah: When did Tellie start punking us?
  Chell: I knew it was a mistake to let them watch John Wick.
• As they enter the diner, they hear "the distinct sound of Caiden giggling". Sid's immediate reaction? "Gross."
  • Turns out it's because he’s talking closely with Verrill and nobody knows how to respond to that. Even rolling a soul check makes them feel weird about it.
• Hannah asks the group to head to an empty hilltop, which Chell assumes is for finding make out points for her and Ethan. Then it turns out Hannah stole Caiden's notebook because she was suspicious.
  Chell: That's deceitful and—
  Tellie and Sid: Stealing! Stealing! Stealing!
• When listing the constellations still showing in the sky, Shannon pronounces Boötes as "booties". She also has Caiden's notes on some of them.
  Libra: Scales. Virgo: ???Virgin??? Ursa: oh god a bear
  Chell: Oh, I wanna fight a big bear.
• The girls prepare to head home, figuring out who's walking, who's driving, and who's teleporting.
  Yuki: I'll walk with you, Sid.
  Sid: Alright, but we're gonna get weird about it. You got any gloves to pick up possums?
  Hannah: Uh...I think I also live in that direction but Chell if you could bring me home that would be great.
  Chell: Yeah, yeah, we'll just—
  Sid: This is the perfect time!
  Chell: To what, wrangle possums?
  Sid: We don't have to wrangle them if they're dead!
  Hannah: Why do you need that?
  Chell: You're gonna kill possums? That's serial killing behaviour!
  Sid: I'm not killing any of the possums! Unless they need me to, like a mercy killing.
  Yuki: Oh my god Sid.
  Chell: Why are you dark avenging possums?!
  Sid: I'm cleaning up the streets!
  Yuki: Okay, I need to go with Sid to make sure she doesn't kill any possums.
  • We never find out what this is about.
• Chell doesn't know what Caiden's middle name is.
  Chell: Caiden Giorgio—
  Caiden: No.
  Chell: Giovanni—
  Caiden: I don't have a middle name!
  Sid: We'll give you one.
  Chell: It's Giorgio now.
• As the girls get more worried about Caiden, Shannon notes they probably know what Elena usually feels like now.
  • Speaking of which, when they can't track him down after school they call Elena to ask about him. She confirms that he came home early, and agrees to smack him on their behalf (twice for Chell).
  Elena: Oh he disappeared without saying anything like a little shit? Sounds familiar.

019: Like a Virgo

• During the previously on, Josh asks if he's being tricked into a twilight.
  Shannon: You know what I am. Say it.
  Cassidy: Stars.
  Jake: Hold on, spider monkey.
  Josh: Hey does anyone wanna go see Face Punch?
• The girls have no idea how bad the Caiden situation is, since him being cagey about stuff and avoiding them isn't any different from normal. But on the other hand, he did talk to a cute boy of his own volition. But on the other other hand, that might just be him finally coming out of his shell? It's very confusing.
• Sid accidentally calls Sungjin "Mr. Parker". He's still a little hopped up on painkillers, so he just happily accepts being part of the Spider-Man family.
• The girls make note that they have to take their shoes off in the Park household.
  Cassidy: I can roll to take my shoes off. *dice noises* Oh no. DM what happens.
  Shannon: What are you even rolling?
  Cassidy: My feet stat.
  • Jake asks not to add a foot stat to the game about young women, and everyone agrees that anyone responsible for the show ending up on Wikifeet is banned.
• Sid doesn't want to barge into Caiden's room because he might be naked. Chell is pretty sure he's a never-nude.
• Seeing Caiden's Ransacked Room, they wonder if this is suspicious or just a rebellion phase. When Shannon presses how exactly he would rebel against parents like Sungjin and Elena, the answer is be as boring as possible.
  Cassidy: Join a polo club, both the sport and the shirt.
• Talking about who even has a physical Porn Stash any more.
  Jake: It's a Men's Health with shirtless Idris Elba on the cover, we know what it's for.
  Cassidy: He reads it for the articles!
• Sid wonders if Tellie can track anything and asks it how it's nose works. It does not know.
• When looking for Caiden at the track meeting, Chell checks if Danny is there. They are.
  Chell: Here's the thing about Danny: they're super weird. Sid, you go talk to them.
  • As soon as Sid says she needs to find someone, Danny asks if she plans on killing them. When they go back to back to look less suspicious, Hannah starts wondering if they fell back into the noir world.
  Hannah: Sid what about the dames!
  Sid: The trouble with dames is dames are trouble! But we're not looking for a dame, we're looking for a...dandy?
  • As they prepare to part ways:
  Sid: My name is—
  Danny: I'll figure it out.
  Sid: Red Fox. Here is my number, call if you hear anything.
  Danny: Alright. Also, would you like to meet my chicken?
  Yuki: What?!
  • Danny proceeds to produce their live pet chick from their jacket, making the rest of the girls run over to them. The chicken's name is Samantha. At home they have Miranda, Carrie, and The Other One.
  • Danny declares themself to be the only one allowed to make fun of Caiden. Sid flexes by bragging about how many socks of Caiden's she owns (she grabbed them earlier to track him with), and Danny legitimately wants to know how many they need to best her.
• During the transformation, Cassidy makes banging noises and jokes that Autumn has guns now. Alan suggests hamhorns, and Jake is right there with whipping out his hamhorn app.
• Their ploy to get Caiden back is buy Spica (the actual star), rename it Caiden, and trick it. Sid wanted to rename it "Fuckface" just to spite it.

020: Down, Set, Fight

• Jake jokes that Spica-as-Caiden would use all the songs the girls asked him to learn against them now.
  Alan (as Chell): But..."Woman" was our song!
• Jake wonders how researching the constellations will help them, since Galileo wouldn't know about the Stars becoming people.
  Cassidy: Maybe the Church wanted to cover that up.
  Josh: The Church?!
  Cassidy: "Yo Galileo, you can't write about that."
  Alan: "Two things you can't write about: Heliocentrism and the Stars as people.
  Jake: They would've loved the Stars as people back then and you know it!
  Cassidy: No, they would've been too sexy!
  Alan: That's true.
  Shannon: His notes were just like "Gemini sexy" and they were like "no! It's stars!"
  Alan: "Throw yourself into a thorn bush right now young man!"
  Cassidy: "The Pope is upset!"
  • And this whole conversation is still more efficient than roleplaying the entirety of the girls going through their day like they tried last episode.
• As Yuki and Sid dream of a figure trapped underwater, Yuki recognizes it as Caiden and runs towards hims screaming. Sid does not, and plays on her phone in the dream. Later she says that she has weird dreams pretty regularly and doesn't pay it any attention now.
  Cassidy: She has dreams about death and the future all the time.
  Shannon: This isn't her first haunting.
  Jake: All her teeth stayed in this time, it's no biggie.
  • When Yuki tries to tell the group she dreamed about Caiden, everyone assumes the worst.
  Yuki: I'm telling you, this was a capital-D Dream!
  Hannah: Capital D? C'mon, Yuki...
  • Sid describes a dream where she got on a roller coaster to hell, and then woke up and got some water, then went back to bed.
  Sid: But then I had a similar dream—
  Chell: You went to Hell twice?
  Sid: Yes but that's something else.
• After Hannah razzes on Harmony for being excited to state the announcements and generally being type-A in homeroom (Shannon describes her as being a few steps away from taking over the class from Miss Diaz), Chell tries to apologize by asking her to read the announcements.
  Harmony: You don't deserve them.
• After Yuki's umpteenth time being the only successful Mind roll (stuff like perception and intelligence) this arc:
  Cassidy: Yuki has a sole braincell most days.
  Jake: She has enough anxiety to notice everything!
• The girls try to sneak out of class. Yuki and Hannah successfully bluff needing to use the washroom, but Chell and Sid try to sneak out without being noticed. Sid starts to trip, but Chell grabs her and just carries her out of the room.
• Spica taunts the girls by insulting their ability to protect their friends, tell them Ethan's transformation is inevitable, and...sitting on Chell's car. Which she takes the most offence to.
  Summer: Can y'all please get off my car? You're a star, you're dense, it's gonna cost a lot to get that dent out.
• After Spica deflects both Summer and Winter's attacks, Jake muses that at least Summer wasn't used as a human shield to block Winter's spear.
  Josh: Don't give him any ideas.
  Jake: That wasn't in my character voice!
  Josh: Don't give Shannon any ideas.
  Shannon (innocently): Whaaaat?
  Jake: She already stabbed me once and used me to kill Sid! I think the ideas are already on the table.
  Shannon: I'm offended. When have I ever pulled any punches? *Beat* Which reminds me.
  *team-wide Oh, Crap!*
• The girls teleport to Hannah's room to escape Spica and Vindemiatrix, even though they're supposed to be in school.
  Chell: How cool is your dad?
  Hannah: He's pretty cool, but if we all just skipped school and sneaked into my room I don't know how he'd feel about that.
  Chell: I mean we're not getting high in here or anything.
  Yuki: There was a monster attack.
  Tellie: We can.
  Hannah: That's true, we can just say there was a monster attack and he just did't hear us come in.
  Tellie: Yes, that part.
  Chell: Yes. That's what Tellie meant. *looks at Tellie in confusion*
  Yuki: I mean, Tellie takes "edibles" to a whole new level every day, so...
  Tellie: I'm made of stardust, bay-bey.
• Hannah gets mixed up trying to call her dad's office.
  Hannah: This is Hannah Flowers, I'm Rowan Flowers' dad.
  Phone: You're his dad?
  Hannah: I'm his daughter—
  Chell: Hannah I don't think you're your dad's dad, that's a whole can of worms.
  Hannah: Look I'm under a lot of stress!
• Sid tries witchcraft to try and find Verrill.
  Shannon: You trie to find V, and the water ripples, and turns black.
  Sid: I am excited!
• Shannon ends the episode on a sinister cliffhanger with a hand reaching out of Sid's bowl of water and tipping it to spill it all out and a knocking on Hannah's door, on account of Cassidy's real-life cats about to get in a fight in the background. Apparently everyone's laughter at this distracted them and they stopped.
  Shannon: I just wanted to avoid cat noises showing up in the background!
  • In the stinger: "I saw a hand go up and thought 'oh someone's about to throw these paws'".

021: Not Playing Fair

• Shannon suggests having Cassidy on a non-Sequinox episode just to mess with people.
• Virgo explains that while Gemini's Stars were killed, she herself is still alive, just "pathetic".
• While Virgo answered their call and asked what they wanted to know, he refuses to simply tell them his plan or just stop. So the girls resort to asking about strengths, weaknesses, his favourite class, and favourite food.
  Virgo:...I didn't fill out the rest of my character sheet.
  *beat*
  Shannon: Actually I did...he likes sweet potatoes.
• Team Sweater Weather try another scyring session, but this one fails because Sid got "MMMBop" stuck in her head.
• Hannah insists that Spica shouldn't be able to enter without being invited, not because he's a vampire, but because it's rude. Spica counters that she left the door open when the girls went back upstairs.
  • Spica at the very least promises not to turn back to his star form while inside Hannah's house because he doesn't want to damage the ceiling. After the ensuing shenanigans he transforms anyways.
  • Sid tries to bring Caiden back from possession using a Vulcan Mind Meld. Which is essentially just pressing her hand against his face.
  Spica: I know I'm a talking star but that's not real.
  • After Cassidy rolls Soul to see if she can mind meld, Josh decides that they can pull anything fictional into the game and asks to roll for shooting spider webs at him.
  Cassidy: We don't have a spider stat!
  Alan: And if we did, Sid's would be ten.
  • Sid gets permission to touch Spica's sweet abs. Cassidy rolls to mind meld with the abs. She fails.
  Sid: The soul is not located in the abs.
• Since everything else is failing, Cehll suggests just annoying the stars into submission.
• Hannah is limited by Josh's own knowledge, so when the subject of entering dreams comes up, she skips over Get Out (2017) and goes right to Dream Warriors. Also:
  Sid: We gotta take some naps!
• In order to encourage people to leave the mall for their own safety, Summer hauls out a huge fireball. Shannon points out that as soon as Sequinox was on the scene people started leaving.
• After Vindemiatrix through a car at the team last episode, Autumn believes that that's a skill the Star got from Ethan and not the other way around.
• Autumn compares the Stars putting each other in people as finding a house to live in. Vindemiatrix is lost because they don't have metaphors in space, either.
• After they determine a way to deal with Virgo's Stars, Sid wants to try it out again immediately.
  Sid: I'm summoning Caiden right now. *beat* Let's find a puddle.
• Hannah mishears Porrima's name has "Poor Rima".
  Hannah: I know, I feel bad for Rima too.
  • Porrima refers to Sequinox' emotional distress as them being in a "weird mood".

022: Play House Pt.1

• Josh describes the scrying mishap from last episode.
  Josh: We meant to send "U up?" but instead we sent "come over".
  • They also determine that if you teleport you're not breaking and entering, you're just entering.
  • The cast keeps calling Porrima "Purina" and joke that they'll get sponsored by them soon. The ad would be Tellie eating the bag and leaving the kibble behind.
  Alan: Purina: It's not trash!
  • Shannon's lost track of how much time has passed in-game due to the recording schedule and her notes not making sense. All they can determine is that maybe two days have passed, and they only get there because Josh is certain Hannah's only worn her school uniform.
  Shannon: All this happened over a week. Don't worry about what you heard.
  Jake: Those old usses? They're assholes! They don't know shit about time!
  Shannon: Remember when I said I was trying to do light notes this time? That means I didn't write any of it down, okay? So it's not canon.
  Alan: Time is not canon.
  Josh: Wait, wait, are you saying this arc isn't canon?
  Shannon: I have some stuff written down! Oh, I shouldn't show you that.
  Josh: Don't worry, I couldn't read it.
  Shannon: Yeah me neither.
• Sid dreams of Vindemiatrix and tries to heckle him. Cassidy rolls a heckle check.
• As soon as they notice there are Stars effecting the people in the park, Spring moves to tackle a random person and Summer has to restrain her. She then offers to trade parent punching duties with Yuki in case they become full Stars.
  • She punches a tree, then jokingly asks if anything happens. Shannon replies that it gets taller and somehow sexier.
  • The entire team roasts Porrima for not being able to read and try to make a deal with her to turn on the Night Queen in exchange for literacy.
  • After realizing that the entire town has been taken over, the girls skip over the angst and go right to realizing they can skip math class.
• As they leave, Chell asks Porrima to at least make sure she has the humans eat and go to the bathroom.
  Porrima: Like, everyone right now?
  Everyone: NO!
  • The exchange leaves both Sid and Cassidy Laughing Mad.
• Yuki gets choked up seeing Sid hug her possessed and autopilot mother. Hannah just compares it to the world's worst Chuck E. Cheese.
  Chell: And here I thought Chuck E. Cheese was the world's worst Chuck E. Cheese.
  Hannah: Nah, they have ski ball.
  • Hannah locked her possessed parents in their bedroom. Sid just puts a sheet over her mom.
• The girls are too uncomfortable staying in their own homes since their families sitting and staring are creeping them out too much. As such, they vote to sleepover at Sid's house. The idea of having to let people into her home causes Sid physical pain.
  • The dark secret of Sid's home is revealed: it's really boring and mundane.
• Xania is extremely comfy inside Kendra's body (it's comfy) and happily tells Chell that in Virgo, she's an elbow.
  • Chell convinces her to dye Kendra's roots while inhabiting her.
• Sid is clearly aggravated by the town being held hostage but reluctantly cheers up when Chell points out they can commit crimes since there are no adults around.
  Sid: (very grudgingly) I do love crime.

023: Play House Pt. 2

• "Saturday Night! Winter Formal! Uh, probably way less exciting when everyone's possessed!"
  Chell: Look, there's a good chance we all die today. I'm gonna look cute when it happens!
  • Chell also sneaks some alcohol in to deal with...everything.
• Josh has been extremely excited to describe Hannah's winter formal outfit.
  Josh: Look I know what people like about Hannah, and it's not the bubbly personality.
• After Vindemiatrix shows up to take the girls to the dance, Chell and Sid kick themselves for not thinking to ask the others Stars.
• They realize Tellie hasn't been addressed in several episodes, and realize that they've probably been taking chunks out of random objects over the past week. Tellie also declares that they will take all four girls as dates.
  Tellie: I have four hands!
  Hannah: I have a date?
  Tellie: I have three hands. *starts chewing off a hand to have only three*
  Yuki: I know we talk about the hand plan a lot but it shouldn't apply to you.
  Tellie: Fine. *starts chewing on foot*
• Shannon didn't think of a theme for Winter Formal, but for irony's sake she quickly decides on "night sky". It's still better than Josh and Jake's respective ideas of "Winter" and "Purple".
• Yuki made sure her dress had pockets so that she had access to her phone. Hannah kept hers in her clutch.
  Shannon: You can just make Ethan hold your purse while you pull out your phone to beat the shit out of him.
  Josh: What's his name? Vladimir?
  Alan: Vindemiatrix.
  Jake: The Animatrix.
  Hannah: Vindemiatrix, hold my purse. You're a peach! Look at you! I almost feel bad about what I have to do tonight.
  • Hannah ends up snatching her purse back after Chell makes another joke about Sequinox getting killed and Vindemiatrix happily agrees.
• The pre-programmed prom-goers are doing a basic two-step while leaving room for Jesus, and fast music is playing. Porrima sees the girls judging the scene and makes them loosen up again.
• Around this point they give up on calling it Winter Formal and switch to Cold Prom.
• Vindemiatrix admits that he should be helping the Stars, but something in the core of him would rather hang out with the girls.
  Yuki: Listen to that.
  Hannah: Yeah, we got a distraction.
  Chell: Follow that. Look at how hot Hannah is.
  Hannah: You thought you were gonna kill me but I'm so hot!
  Chell: Can't do it now!
  Shannon: Oh god it's gonna be like that scene from Austin Powers! You're just gonna make his head catch on fire!
  Josh: That's how we win! We'll just be hot at them!
• Spica and Virgo finally show up while the girls are in a photo booth. They use up the rest of their photos before addressing him.
  Spica: Don't stop on our behalf.
  Yuki: Actually, that would be the biggest behalf that we would stop on.
  Hannah: Your behalf is huge.
  Chell: You have a huge behalf. How did you even get it in this building?
  Sid: Ha! Your behalf!
  • Spica also shaved the sides of Caiden's head for Cold Prom, and the girls grimace at how Caiden will react.
• Yuki and Chell start transforming while Sid is taking photos with the other Stars and has a mouthful of cookie. Hannah has to dig through her clutch, just like she figured.
• Hannah and Chell spiked the punch before the fight. Shortly after, Chell gets double ones (the best roll in the system) on her first attack.
  Jake: Alcohol makes you strong everybody!
  Josh: Teens should drink alcohol! They'll be so strong!
  Jake: You'll be able to fight so good! *beat* Kids? Teens? Don't. This is jokes.
  Cassidy: Hey kids, we have a lot of fun here on Sequinox. But you know what's not fun? Alcohol poisoning.
  Josh: The filler this time is gonna have to be a Very Special Episode.
• Since Spica's violin has the opposite effect as Caiden's and weakens the team, Jake states that he's probably playing the worst song ever written: "Institutionalized" by Suicidal Tendencies.
• Shannon chooses to zoom out and end the episode before Yuki can call the police and break up cold prom.

024: Dance it Off

• Cassidy being genuinely surprised that Jake doesn't know all the Pokemon even though he has a podcast all about them.
• Chell probably tried to throw Yuki's phone in the punch when she tried to narc on them, but settled for just knocking it out of her hand.
• Shannon compares the wave that caused everyone to stop being possessed and fall over to the "yuppie wave" from the end of Power Rangers in Space.
• Alan can't believe Jake wears shorts in winter, though Jake points out basically everyone wears them in New England. Conversely, Cassidy hates basketball shorts even when people are playing basketball.
• The girls hear sirens outside and figure the cops, after recovering from recent events, just turned the sirens on reflexively.
• While Chell, Yuki, and Sid pretend that they also are waking up with no memory, Hannah and Ethan don't bother.
  Hannah: Oh no...*takes a drink from spiked punch*
  • She also decides, since Ethan is just standing around watching everyone, to start a rumour that he's a Sequinox.
  Ethan: It's me, I'm all four of them. One for each limb.
  Shannon: He's just gonna, like flex. I don't know how to flex legs. *Beat* He just does a squat.
  Chell: Ethan stop! You're gonna rip your pants!
• Caiden is slower to wake up because he was possessed for longer, and also he did get punched in the face a lot. And Hannah decides to expedite the process by throwing punch in his face.
  Hannah: I just wanted to make sure you were better!
  Caiden: Well I think I might be worse now?
  Shannon: He starts wiping the punch off his face—
  Alan: The extremely alcoholic punch that may have gotten to his eyes and sinuses?
  Josh: Character choice, Hannah's a wicked lightweight.
  Sid: That punch'll disinfect any wounds he has though, so that's good.
• Caiden trying to get his bearings can only ask "what...is it?" Chell and Sid tell him that they're at Winter Formal, but make sure he calls it Cold Prom so it doesn't sound weird, and also don't look in any mirrors.
  Josh: Can I go in for a selfie so he can see himself in my phone?
• Chell lets it slip that the punch is spiked and Harmony just takes the bowl and leaves.
• Chell and Hannah decides they're gonna act like the formal is going on like normal until the cops show up.
  Chell: And if they try to come in we'll just lock the door!
  Hannah: Just barricade the door!
  Yuki: Let's not barricade the doors...
  Sid: Actually, I think you just discovered my life philosophy.
  Chell: Lock them motherfuckers out!
  • They do end up enacting this plan, and only after realize that Harmony got locked out. Though Shannon's pretty sure she can find another way in easily.
  • Also, Chell re-spikes another punch bowl.
  Sid: Why do you have so much alcohol?
  Chell: Because we were coming to Cold Prom were I thought we were gonna die?
  Hannah: If we're gonna down we're going down drunk!
  Chell: We're going down with a warm belly!
  Caiden: I would've died with shitty hair...
  Yuki: I don't wanna die at all...again...
• After getting very drunk very quickly, Ethan decides to carry her off to get some water by piggy-backing her.
  Hannah: *suddenly sober* I love it when a plan comes together.
• When V is briefly seen separate from Virgo, but disappears when the girls are distracted, Sid's plan to find him is just storm into the boy's washrooms. Meanwhile, Hannah (who's gone from buzzed to drunk to hungover in the span of twenty minutes) bursts in the girls' room and immediately starts critisizing the dresses of everyone in there.
  Yuki: Sorry, you all look great.
  Hannah: I don't know if I would say "great"...
  Jake: Drunk Hannah is mean Hannah.
  Josh: I wanted to punch her up a bit to episode one Hannah for a minute!
  Jake: All the work we've done, gone!
• Chell apologizes for getting Caiden involved with V and being turned into a Star, and for getting a haircut he doesn't like. Caiden says it's fine and figures Danny probably has razors on them.
  Chell: I'm sure someone else has clippers, y'all don't have to do a razor job in the bathroom on your hair like you're in some sort of Alanis Morissette video.
  *stifled laughter from the others*
  Chell: Should've gone with Fiona Apple, missed opportunity.
• Everyone rolls to see if they're hungover, and the only one who fails is Yuki who barely had a sip.
  • She's on Tellie duty, and has to repeatedly push them back into the bag to stop them from making noise. It doesn't work very well.
  Tellie: Does anybody wanna hear the most annoying noise in the world?
  Yuki: No...
  Sid: Yes!
  *Tellie starts inhaling*
• The team figures Harmony should remember Sequinox taking her to the hospital, but also feel like she'll just remember them beating her up considering how things have gone with her in the past.
• Shannon declares that nobody is outside the day after cold prom due to "Citywide Holiday: Uh-Oh!".
• The girls trying to figure out where V's luggage went turns into them wondering how Virgo even registered them at the school without an address, and then into the players wondering who their principal is. Shannon rattles off a list of names she has set aside and decides he's Neil Breen.
  Shannon: That's why everything weird keeps happening, it's because he's here....now.
• Tellie starts eating snow out of boredom.
  Josh: Does Tellie get brain freeze from eating snow too fast?
  Shannon: Tellie doesn't have a brain.
• V asks Team Sweater Weather if they can do magic. Sid clarifies that they don't do it well, but they do have a lot of spirit. And also Hannah's house is probably haunted now.
  • They end up joining with him to try and tap into whatever he saw while possessed.
  Chell: Please don't Babadook my mom's van!
  Yuki: No, let the ghosts come.
  Chell: Jesus Christ, Yuki!
  Hannah: Yuki you are all over the map lately.
  • As soon as they start scrying, Tellie turns into their big form and Chell nearly crashes the car. Hannah and Caiden both have to assist her in steering properly.
  • When Yuki, Sid, and V's eyes turn solid gold, Hannah gets creeped out and says they all look like "gold Undertakers".
  • A moment after the scrying ends, Tellie shrinks back down to normal. They're disappointed.
  Tellie: I don't wanna be baby, I want power!
• The girls don't know where to hang since the diner is closed for the first time. Caiden mentions that his grandma is trying to convince his mom to leave...the country. The best argument Chell can come up with for staying is "the leaves are so pretty in the fall!".
• In the stinger, Cassidy states that she brought Caiden's socks with her to Cold Prom.

---