Guy in Blue Chair: I think it is.
Guy in Green Chair: Then why are we watching it?
Guy in Blue Chair: I don't know. I think we're watching it because it doesn't make any sense.
Guy in Green Chair: Oh.
Guy in Green Chair: Well it doesn't change the fact that this is crap.
Guy in Blue Chair: Nope.
Guy in Green Chair: You wanna watch some more?
Guy in Blue Chair: Yep.
The Demented Cartoon Movie! is a 2001 Flash cartoon written, directed, drawn, animated, created, recorded, conceived of, responsibility claimed, filmed, edited, converted to standard transport elephant zucchini format and converted back again by Brian Kendall.
It features a trailer, opening credits, stick figures, green and blue chairs, Qrrbrbirlbel, a kamikaze watermelon (DA-DA-DA-DA, Da-DAAAAA! Wheeeeee! *splat*), a production of Romeo and Juliet, a tidal wave, nucularnote explosions, a rocket to Mars, a car race, a superhero, a villain and an ending, among other things. If you have thirty minutes of your life to waste, you ought to check it out.
- Angrish: The director falls into this as Juliet keeps murdering Romeo.
- Anvil on Head: Mr. Weight On Head
- Ax-Crazy: Juliet can't keep herself from killing Romeo.
- Big Red Button: A few gags revolve around a big red button. Big red buttons are also seen on the Auto Romeo Maker and the Auto Damsel Maker.
- Blah! *BOOM*
- "Brian Ken- Blah, blah, blah"
- BFG: Mr. Blaster Ray Gun.
- Bile Fascination: In-Universe, the Chair Guys call the movie crap but keep watching anyway, likely for this exact reason.
- Bomb Whistle: Followed by *BOOM* - you guessed that, right?
- Brick Joke: "Blah." It's mostly been left behind by the time of Evil Blah and Super Blah's confrontation, but then Evil Blah kills Super Blah by having him read a sign that says "Blah."
- Buffy Speak
- The Cape: Super Blah.
- Card-Carrying Villain: Evil Blah. "Hahahaha! I feel very evil today!"
- Cartoon Bomb: Zeeky H. Bomb.
- The Chew Toy: Bloing Gloing! is almost always getting destroyed for whatever reason.
- Cloudcuckooland: Qrrbrbirlbel in a nutshell.
- Colony Drop: Too many times to count.
- Creating Life: The Auto Romeo and Generic Damsel Makers.
- Clone Degeneration: The last damsel created proves to be a complete nutcase.
- Curse Cut Short: "And furthermore whoever made this movie is a complete jacka—" )(BOOM)
- Damsel in Distress: The generic damsel.
- Deadline News: "Oh, Crap!, that's going to be broadcast all over the world!"
- Diabolical Mastermind: Evil Blah.
- The Ditherer: The car driver, to the point of being Too Dumb to Live.
- Doing In the Wizard: When the two Blah Guys go to Mars to find the secret of the Zeeky Words. Subverted; after they destroy the bomb launcher with its own H-Bomb, the Zeeky Words still blow the Blah Guys up.
- Earth-Shattering Kaboom: It's fun to count the number of times this happens.note
- Esoteric Happy Ending: "HAPPY END!" Guy in Green Chair: "Happy end"? What the hell is "happy end"?
- Every Car Is a Pinto
- Everything Explodes Ending: It ends with those two stick figures on the chairs being stuck to their faces and their chairs falling apart, causing their city to collapse, and finally unleashing a missile that knocks the Moon out of the sky, which destroys the Earth.
- Everything Makes a Mushroom: There are a lot of mushroom-generating explosions in this movie, either because of random H-bombs or someone saying "the Zeeky Words".
- Exactly What It Says on the Tin: Fooby the Kamikaze Watermelon, Auto Romeo Maker, Auto Damsel Maker, Make the World Blow Up Button, brick wall and Fooby Buttons, Mr. Blaster Ray Gun... practically everything.
- Don't forget the Crash Yourself Into a Brick Wall Race.
- Hell, the movie itself. Self-explanatory title indeed.
- GASP!: "gasp"
- Freeze-Frame Bonus: At the end of the bad dance act segment, just before the guy gets blown up.
- Gilligan Cut: "At least they don't have any words that make the world blow up!"
- "I stand thoroughly corrected."
- Giant Foot of Stomping: Mr. Big Shoe of Stomping
- Go Wait Outside: A rare non-video game use. Super Blah arrived to save the day too early, so Evil Blah tells him to come back in a few minutes.
- Greek Chorus: The two stick figures sitting in the chairs.
- The Igor: Several of Evil Blah's Nondescript Henchmen.
- Inherently Funny Words: We repeat: Zeeky Boogy Doog. Fooby, the Kamikaze Watermelon. Blah.
- Well at least there isn't any words to blow up the world.
- Gleeg Snag Zip! *BOOM!!!*
- Well at least there isn't any words to blow up the world.
- Inventional Wisdom:
- "Oops! I accidentally pressed the H-Bomb button!" "Wait, why the hell would there just happen to be an H-Bomb—" *BOOM*
- "Hey, you just pushed the Make-The-World-Blow-Up button!" "You know what, this movie sucks, I don't get it...."
- Keet: Bloing Gloing!
- Kill 'em All: Every character save one gets killed at least once, as is pointed out by the ending.
- Though that may just be the creator stringing the viewers along. Otherwise it's Mr. Weight.
- The credits challenge you to find the one person throughout the entire movie that didn't die or otherwise get maimed in some way. Answer: From the beginning, skip scenes seven times. One guy exits stage right just before the cars crash into the cliff.
- Kryptonite Factor: Super Blah, like many of the other Blah Guys, is prone to having his head blown off if he ever says the word "Blah".
- Lampshade Hanging: After the Earth blows up the second time, a guy watching it says, "How many times has the Earth blown up?".
- Lazy Artist - complete with an arrow noting this.
- Left the Background Music On: The Ominous Pipe Organ.
- Leitmotif: Evil Blah has an Ominous Pipe Organ piece that plays for him...to his annoyance.
- Letting the Air Out of the Band: Brian Kendall seems to love this effect, as it happens in many places during the movie:
- At the end of the "trailer".
- During the opening and end credits, to end both of them.
- The theme music for the news report trails off like this.
- Both times Evil Blah stops the Ominous Pipe Organ from playing.
- Made of Explodium
- Made of Indestructium: The Zeeky Causer is a tiny robot that is absolutely impervious to Zeeky explosions.
- Made of Plasticine: The typical Blah Guy can be decapitated by getting kicked in the head with a shoe.
- Mad Scientist: Crazy Scientist Blah.
- Magic A Is Magic A: Most of the time.
- Medium Awareness: "You fast-forwarded it wrong!"
- Minsky Pickup: Just before the Zeeky Boogy Doog/Gleeg Snag Zip song.
- Missing Episode: [invoked]The supposed "introduction sequence" has been "lost" which probably means it was never made.
- According to the animator, it was supposed to involve a spinning office chair.
- Mock Cousteau
- Negative Continuity: Most notably, the Earth explodes eleven times.
- The second time the Earth blows up, two guys are watching it and even acknowledge the fact.
- No Fourth Wall:
- Nothing Can Stop Us Now! - View quote on said page.
- Nothing Is Scarier: The actual appearance of The Dreaded Bubblefish is unknown, mainly because it lives deep in the ocean, where no light shines, and because both times they attempted to show the appearance of the Bubblefish, it turned out to be the Zeeky H. Bomb.
- Off with His Head!: Many of the characters lose their head to ridiculously easy decapitation by several means, including getting their head kicked off by a shoe.
- Oh, Crap!Scientist: Now it seems as though we have found ze bubblefish. We are close now. When we shine ze light on it—
Zeeky H. Bomb: ZEEKY BOOGY DOOG!
Scientist: Oh Crap.
Interviewer: What do you have to say in your defense?
- When Zeeky is being interviewed:
Zeeky H. Bomb: Ah... ZEEKY BOOGY DOOG!
Anchor: Oh, Crap!, that's going to be broadcast all over the world!
Cut to Earth which becomes covered in explosions
- Ominous Pipe Organ: Parodied! Evil Blah demanded one of his minions to shut off the organ, and proceeds to shoot the organ when it plays again because it annoyed him.
- Overly Long Gag:
- The trip to Mars. Conversed by the characters watching it.
- The bad dance act.
- The movie overall is half an hour long, which is miraculous considering that it doesn't take particularly long to load on most connections.
- Platform Hell: In movie form.
- Rage Against the Author / Who Writes This Crap?!: When the guy steps on the Make-The-World-Blow-Up button, he starts a rant about how the movie sucks and makes no sense. Before he can really lay into the author, the world blows up.
- Random Events Plot: Let's just sum it all up as this.
- Retroactive Wish: Someone said, "It would suck if an airplane randomly flew out of the sky and crashed into us." which is exactly what happened. His friend then said, "It would suck if a large, generic wad of cash randomly appeared in front of me that I could do whatever I wanted with." A shoe kicked his head off.
- Rule of Funny: This trope in its purest, most distilled form.
- Running Gag: 90% of the movie. The Zeeky words; the Kamikaze Watermelon; the rocket trip to Mars, "blah", the giant boot...
- Saying Sound Effects Out Loud:
- The "poof" and "splash" sound effects are also said out loud.
- The Scottish Trope: A nuclear explosion happens every time someone says "zeeky boogy doog" *BOOM* As a result everybody calls the phrase "the Zeeky Words".
- And the entire world breaks in half whenever anyone says "Gleeg snag zip". *World breaks in half*
- And if a Blah guy says "Blah"— *head pop*
- Or if someone mentions Fooby the Kamikaze Watermelon— *charge fanfare* "Wheeee" *splat*
- Screaming Woman: The Generic Damsel, who has to be replaced every time her head falls off.
- Shoot the Shaggy Dog: Early and often. Lampshaded after the Mars scenes.
- Shout-Out: The entire intro, and possibly the entire movie, is steeped with allusions to Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
- Speak of the Devil: Fooby, the Kamikaze Watermelon!
- *fanfare* WHEEEEEEEEE! *splat*Guy in Chair: At least there aren't any words that make the whole world blow up.
[Another guy appears on TV, holding a cannon to his grinning face, and stays perfectly still for several seconds, until:]
Guy on TV: Gleeg snag zip!
[The Earth immediately explodes.]
Guy in Chair: I stand thoroughly corrected.
- *fanfare* WHEEEEEEEEE! *splat*
- Stock Footage: You are going to see the same H-bomb explosion nearly twice a minute. With the movie going on for half an hour, that is a lot.
- Stuff Blowing Up: Nearly everything in the movie explodes, sometimes more than once.
- Tempting Fate: "And nothing is going to stop us!"
- That's No Moon!: "Wait a minute, that's not an ant..."
- The End of the World as We Know It: 14 times.
- Too Dumb to Live:
"Do you want to crash?" "Uh. Well, not really." "Then maybe you should steer." "But I'm baaaad at thaaaat!"
- The guy who presses the various buttons.
- The car driver.
- "Eeeeh, I'm bored." "Me too." "Eh-what are we going to do?" "I dunno." "Wanna play a game?" "Sure, what game?" "I dunno." "...Oh I know! Let's play catch the H-Bomb!" "Yeah!" "WHEEE!"
- Heck, virtually everyone in this movie.
- The Unintelligible: Bloing Gloing!
- The above is dragged out so much that after a while, he just gets crushed by Mr. Weight as soon as he starts speaking.
- Unreadably Fast Text
- Fortunately, the cartoon has a pause button built-in.
- Verbal Tic: "Nucular" explosions.
- It's pronounced "nuclear"!
- What Does This Button Do?: Within the first few segments, we see a guy walk up to a wall which has a big red button marked "!!!!!!!!" He looks at it while making curious noises, then pushes it, only to be crushed by Mr. Weight.
- Quickly followed by another guy showing up, pointing and laughing, only to get his head kicked off by a shoe on a stick.
- A later scene involves another "Hmm Guy" pressing a series of buttons. One causes a brick wall to pop up on the nearby road, causing several cars to crash behind him. The second causes Fooby the kamikaze watermelon to make an appearance. The last one causes the world to blow up.
- Your Head A-Splode: Every time a stick guy says "Blah!", their head pops off explosively.
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