A Date With Rosie Palms is an old trope with a lot of wicks, and while its own description states that masturbation on its own is People Sit on Chairs, that's exactly what the vast majority of its wicks consist of. I did my best to seperate any kind of tropeworthy use into a category on its own, but while there were a few scattered examples of various masturbation-related things that could be tropeworthy, any new trope would need to be built essentially from scratch since there are so few meaningful examples to work with.

The wick check results:

What the description suggests are meaningful uses:

• Used for jokes about Hormone-Addled Teenager s : 4/75, or 5.3%
• Masturbation is indicative of being a loser, creepy, etc.: 1/75, 1.3%
• Masturbating due to lack of opposite-gender company: 1/75, 1.3%
• Artificial insemination and sperm donation: 2/75, 2.67%
• Viewer titillation/fanserverice: 0/75, 0%

Meaningful uses not in the description:

• Excessive masturbation causes problems in a character's life: 1/75, 1.3%
• Visual Innuendo involving masturbation: 2/75, 2.67%
• Character has trauma related to masturbation: 2/75, 2.67%
• Jokes about weird masturbation habits: 6/75, 8%
• Character masturbates due to some frustration in their life: 3/75, 4%
• Self-Abuse (aka Masturbation is evil): 1/75, 1.3%
• Characters squicked by someone's masturbation: 1/75, 1.3%

Not meaningful

• Masturbation exists: 48/75, or 64%
• ZCE (to such a degree that it couldn't be sorted into one of the other categories): 3/75, 4%

Because of how scattershot the use is and the vast majority being just 'masturbation exists', I don't think this can be fixed as a trope. 'Jokes about weird masturbation habits' (six examples) seems the best candidate to Yard if we wanted to try and salvage something from it.

Since it's already listed as the supertrope to a number of other masturbation-related tropes (and no masturbation index exists), I suggest just turning it into an index and dewicking.

1. ComicBook.Superman Secret Identity: Played for laughs. Clark sees his daughters using their superpowers, but decides not to discuss the situation with them. Lois is shocked at his passivity and says that what he witnessed isn't like "your mom walking in on you in the bathroom with a dirty magazine". Clark, embarrassed, replies "My mom told you about that?"
2. Film.Grandmas Boy 2006: Alex can no longer stay at Jeff's house after one of these goes VERY wrong.
   Jeff: I can't believe you came on my mom.
3. Radar.Saturday Night Live: One sketch about the Elf on the Shelf myth is about what happens when an elf has been stationed to the same shelf with the kid until he reaches a certain age...
4. Pantsless Males, Fully-Dressed Females: Chip: [having A Date With Rosie Palms on the spot] I, uhhhhhhhh, I'll be in my room with the door locked!

1. Series.What We Do In The Shadows 2019:
   • Jeff is shown pleasuring himself when Nadja takes the camera crew to spy on him to highlight how pathetic and single he is.

1. ComicBook.Y The Last Man:
   • Batteries for vibrators are suddenly a lot more valuable.

1. Characters.The Big Bang Theory Sheldon Cooper: Asexuality: He casually refers to Penny being beautiful and immediately recognizes Leonard is attracted to her, seems to (mildly) compete for her attention and when they visit a sperm bank, Leonard makes an off-hand comment that Sheldon is a "semi-pro", the implications in such a context should be obvious.
2. Series.The Red Green Show: In one episode, an old rich guy dies, and since he amassed his fortune by donating to the local sperm bank, everyone in town gets DNA tested hoping to get a match, and therefore be entitled to the inheritance.

1. Characters.Pastamonsters Enderman And His Allies: He was fired from his old job for masturbating constantly behind his desk.

1. Funny.Nick Bertke: In the "Perth Milks It" video, one guy has his back to the camera and looks an awful lot like he's masturbating, but then he turns around and shows that he was very vigorously and suggestively shaking a milk carton.
2. Series.Wildboyz: Does This Remind You of Anything?: Chris and Steve-O stroke sea cucumbers, causing them to release their stringy white innards.

1. ComicBook.Y The Last Man:
   • As a kid, 355 found out her family had been killed in a car crash immediately after one of these. It put her off masturbation for years.
2. Paralyzing Fear of Sexuality: Jacques is a virgin at heart, a wannabe Celibate Hero, and deeply believes sexuality is, oh dear, such a sin. Unfortunately, the UST between him and his, ahem, experienced master, keeps piling until Jacques succumbs to a DIY solution, and gets a huge moral hangover for it. The whole issue is played for light drama and fun, but in a darker work, it could have fueled worlds of angst.

1. Funny.The Cinema Snob 2016 Episodes: Well, that's what you think. Luckily I have my lotion and a dirty sock to help me out with that.
2. Film.Opera 1987: Marco tells Betty he masturbates before he films every scene to relieve tension. It's unclear if he's truly serious or not.
3. Characters.Starpocalypse: She simulates destroying the earth while masturbating.
4. Radar.Harry Hills TV Burp: Whenever women's underwear flies onto Harry's desk, he pulls out a briefcase and snatches them inside, mumbling that he'll "save them for later".
5. Testing the Editors: In An Itch in Time, Bob Clampett intentionally wrote the gag where Elmer's dog drags his butt in pain across the floor, stopping for a moment to mug to the audience "Hey, I better cut this out, I may get to like it" to see if the censors would tell him to change it or remove it. They didn't.
6. In Love with Your Carnage: The Major loves war so much that felt he was "blue balled" by the Cold War and gets burning loins while watching London on fire. He's just as in love with Integra's carnage as Alucard and Anderson are as well and admits to fantasizing about her at night alone "with a bottle of Chardonnay".

1. Fridge.Menage A 3: Zii, on the other hand, will either somehow stick to the lesson and be okay-ish with her girlfriend being away for long stretches of time, as she has been shown to at least be able to use A Date With Rosie Palms to vent her frustrations, or, worst case, will default back into borderline sexual predator territory, partly because, as shown, she like DiDi is incapable of maintaining a functional long term relationship, but mostly due to her being a Womanchild, unable to stick to her guns for longer than a strip or two.
2. VisualNovel.Melody: Melody is often seen masturbating in the early chapters to deal with her frustration.
3. WebVideo.Auralnauts Star Wars: Referenced by the song "In the Zone" as the downside of being Just Friends.
   Baby, I'm in the zone,
   like a king without a throne.
   I'd rather have you by my side,
   than play the skin trombone!

1. EyeScream.American Dad: In "A Smith in the Hand", an Anvilicious video on the dangers of masturbation begins with a boy coming home from school, entering the bathroom with a copy of National Geographic with an African tribeswoman on the cover, and shortly after coming out, his eyes melt and his palms become covered in hair as he lets out a Big "NO!".

1. PowerIncontinence.Fan Works: Later chapters have Harry Squicked out upon realizing he also sees all the people who've had sex there. When he enters Bellatrix's old room at Grimmauld Place, he mentions that he can't seem to touch anything without seeing an image of her "doing her thing".

1. WebVideo.Truthpoint Darkweb Rising: Dril thinks No Nut November refers to abstaining from eating semen.
2. Quotes.Mirror Match: So basically, Jack is ramming himself against himself...we are watching the most violent masturbation ever!
3. Webcomic.Terminal Lance: A common hobby of marines. You better believe that looking at normal porn is the one of the more normal things to happen in the strip.
4. ComicBook.Y The Last Man:

   P.J: Seriously, you've been the last cock on Earth for ages. How do you not bone one girl in that whole time?
   Yorick: (holds up his hand)

5. Mandatory Motherhood: However, many misinterpreted the text to mean that Onan preferred having A Date With Rosie Palms over actual sex, and in some cultures and languages, including Hebrew, his name has become the basis for the modern word for "masturbation".
6. Fanfic.The Dragon Of The Seventh Heaven: In Chapter 9, when Aika mentions having strange dreams and her hand hurting for no reason, Issei flatly asks her if it's her "happy hand".
7. Film.Emmanuelle: Both Marie-Ange and Emmanuelle herself do this in the same room in the original film. Emmanuelle also does this several times over the course of the film series.
8. Designated Love Interest: In the little-known book Shackleton's Stowaway, the main character, Perce, fantasizes (no, not like THAT...well, okay, maybe), about a young woman back home named Anna, who he believes he's in love with.
9. FormulaBreakingEpisode.Web Original: Cue rave-like video of Ego's cats while Jon and Ego start singing Space Jam songs. Oh, and Jon masturbating.
10. Webcomic.The Oatmeal: What to do when your boss starts masturbating at work. Eww…
11. Recap.How I Met Your Mother S 7 E 07 Noretta: Pork Authority's closed. Looks like it's Hand Central Station for you tonight, little buddy.
12. WebVideo.Wiiviewer: In the Netflix review, the Wiiviewr admits to having a secret that he hasn't told his friends or family, checks to see if the boys are asleep, then grabs a box of tissues from the bathroom.
13. Characters.The Platform: He masturbates at one point while on level 48.
14. Series.What We Do In The Shadows 2019:
    • Laszlo's ghost needs Laszlo's help (or at least his hands) to reach an an orgasm.
15. BLAM.Music: This song however, is a somewhat disturbing song about A Date With Rosie Palms (to Mary Kate And Ashley no less!) that ends abruptly for about a minute of silence, then the band just start goofing off on the microphone.... its out of left field to be sure.
16. The Roast: Greg Giraldo uses this joke regularly when mentioning female roasters.
    (about Farrah Fawcett) "That poster of you in the bathing suit ... That poster caused more seed to be spilled than a crime lab technician with Parkinson's Disease."
17. YMMV.Frozen Days: The masturbation scene, when you think about it too much.
18. Characters.Arby N The Chief: He decides to jerk off when he does well in his match against Chief.
19. RoleEndingMisdemeanor.News And Columns: Legal analyst Jeffrey Toobin of The New Yorker was suspended, and later fired, in October 2020 for masturbating during a Zoom call with co-workers without realizing his webcam was still on.
20. Characters.Paranormal Mystery Squad: All but outright stated to be what She was doing here.
21. Funny.Code Geass Cornelia Of The Defection: Well, yes, but I do masturbate sometimes.
22. WMG.Poison Oak Epileptic Trees Archive Two: Mr. Krabs masturbates to money.
23. WMG.El Goonish Shive: Maybe he's not educated about the topic either, maybe he just has the wrong assumptions.
24. Characters.Avenue Q: Considering he thinks The Internet Is for Porn, it should be obvious he's a masturbator.
25. WebVideo.Grumpy Tropers: Implied with MrCDean since he was playing Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball, of all things.
26. Potty Emergency: Sometimes a variant has the character(s) looking for a place to perform some non-potty-related but similarly private activity such as changing clothes, making out, or whatever.
27. Fanfic.To Aruverse Rewrite Project: At first readers were led to believe Maika won't let Index sleep on her brother's bunk bed due to A Date With Rosie Palms only to reveal that her brother farts a lot in bed.
28. AccidentalInnuendo.Music: Louis Armstrong's "A Kiss to Build a Dream On" is a sweet song about the singer remembering his lover while they're separated. Perhaps remembering her a bit too much.
29. WebAnimation.If The Emperor Had A Text To Speech Device: The Fab Custodes do something involving their fab bodies but "only on Thursdays".
30. Horrible.Video Games Other: Philly Flasher is Beat 'Em & Eat 'Em WITH THE GENDERS REVERSED! The only thing different about it is that besides playing two nude men moving across the building, instead of catching semen, the player will catch breast milk from an old witch - not even a Hot Witch. Once the breast milk is caught, the two men will then engage in masturbation.
31. Fridge.Homestuck Trolls: Could you say he is spilling seed?
32. Autonomous and Artificial Appendage Index: Breaking In Old Habits: Someone gets a hand replacement. They instantly decide to use it for... erm... something...
33. Seinfeld.Tropes O To Z: In the first half of the Grand Finale, the private plane bearing Jerry, George, Kramer, and Elaine seems to be dropping into a crash landing, and while they all panic, George confesses to Jerry that he cheated in their contest, which means Jerry was the real winner.
34. Characters.A Dance With Rogues: The Princess can do this, and it even counts as practice for her "special skill."
35. Bungled Hypnotism: Donnie's psychiatrist uses hypnotism to investigate what she thinks are his paranoid hallucinations. One of her questions causes him to fixate on his sexual fantasies instead, forcing her to wake him up in a hurry when he starts to reach into his pants.
36. Film.Happy Death Day: "Hi, I'm the so-called fine vagine, and if that's the way you refer to girls, you and your hand are going to have a very lasting relationship".
37. WesternAnimation.Beavis And Butt Head Do America: Beavis has one in Anderson's camper. And it's implied both of them have done this in Anderson's camper and tool shed in the past.
38. Film.Bubba Ho Tep: In the short story, Elvis takes advantage of the first erection he's had in decades. Also, we learn that sore really is probably just a sore...'cause it pops
39. Literature.The True History Of The Conquest Of Mexico: Gasshole: A Spanish soldier named Trujillo is flogged when Moctezuma complains that he could heard him doing traques (read: loudly farting) during his night guard, even after Moctezuma chastised him and gave him gold not to do it again. Amusingly, some versions of the text censor the action and replace it by "dishonest things", which has led some authors to wrongly believe Trujillo was having A Date With Rosie Palms with improper noises instead.
40. Recap.Freshy Kanal Walter White Vs Willy Wonka: Of course Walt has to make a masturbation joke based on Willy's name.
    Walt: Wonka was way too busy in the nut room fucking wanking his Willy!
41. Recap.Angel S 04 E 09 Long Days Journey
    Angel: How's Manny?
    Gunn: Gave him some magazines about half hour ago to keep him occupied.
    Gwen: Swimsuit Edition. (smiles) He's occupied.
42. Funny.The Cinema Snob 2019 Episodes: When Freddy says "Ready or not...here I come..." Snob adds a light slapping sound and a squirt.
43. Bishie Sparkle: We see Mari watching Isao, who is surrounded by sparkles throughout. This is in stark contrast to both the fact that she was watching Isao as he did things like enjoy A Date With Rosie Palms and in relation to nearly everyone else in this sequence looking like creatures out of Attack on Titan.
44. Characters.Todd And The Book Of Pure Evil: According to Atticus, he spends most of his free time jerking off.
45. Fanfic.The Prodigal Lincoln: Four Loud girls are seen/caught in the act at one point or another. It's almost the closest thing the fic has to a recurring joke. ALMOST.
46. Anime.Variable Geo: But V.G. is strictly an All or Nothing affair, meaning, the losers go home empty-handed and publicly humiliated, because they have to strip for the crowd. At a certain level of competition, they also have to... put on a show.
47. Awesome.Have I Got News For You: How bad are these people that they can't watch ten minutes of television without breaking into a wank?
48. Funny.Well Theres Your Problem: The "put out a fire via A Date With Rosie Palms" gag from the Texas City explosion episode returns, topped off by a mock commercial for BlueChews

1. Headscratchers.Code Geass Miscellaneous Two: Okay, here's a JBM: what's with all the hatred for Nina? Yes, she's an Axe-Crazy Psycho Lesbian who set off what is basically a nuke, (actually, said nuke was set off by Suzaku, who was acting under the influence of his 'Live' geass given to him by Lelouch, so those two are certainly at fault for its detonation as well, especially the latter), and of course the whole "Table-kun" incident, but...seriously, it's not like she's the only one who's done anything stupid/callous/evil in that show.
2. Music.The Horrors: “I Can’t Control Myself”.
3. Webcomic.Rage Comics: The Fap Guy.