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Characters: Suburban Knights
A list of characters from the That Guy with the Glasses anniversary special Suburban Knights.
    open/close all folders 

     Group One 

The Nostalgia Critic as Link

Played by: Doug Walker

  • Becoming the Mask: After spending ages actively averting it, when he's had enough of everything he rants about all the crap that's happened to Link. Although, ranting about his life as the Critic would probably take up an episode of its own.
    • Also done at the end in a sadder way with Ma-Ti, he throws away his tie when he's rushing over and Ma-Ti knocks his glasses off. Those were the last two "Critic" identifiers left.
  • Break the Haughty: Done nicer than in Kickassia (he does get to be a good guy instead of just being willing to commit murder-suicide) but he still gets punished for being greedy. And with his reaction to Ma-Ti's death, it overlaps with Break the Cutie.
  • Call Back: He reviewed The Legend of Zelda cartoon in an earlier review.
  • Character Development: From being a greedy asshole to a capable leader who can boost morale with a Rousing Speech. Not only that, but he keeps himself relatively stable compared to how he was in Kickassia. At the end, he even considers going on another quest to resurrect Ma-Ti. He also seems to have gotten his greed under control as he decides to hide the Gauntlet rather than profit from it after seeing the magic it uses is real.
    • The development also seeps into his usual episodes, in both a good and bad way. Good news is that he's learned all actions have consequences and pain is necessary, bad news is that his Miles to Go Before I Sleep side has gotten worse.
  • Cool Sword: The Master Sword, in fact... which unceremoniously (and unexpectedly) breaks in part 6.
  • Despair Event Horizon: Starts ranting about in-character woes when he grows sick of all the magic he's encountering.
  • The Ditz: Although he gets some intelligence back in part five.
  • Face Death with Dignity: Maybe he was Genre Savvy to know he'd get saved, but he looked surprisingly okay with things when Jaffers was about to kill him both times.
  • Flat Earth Atheist: He refuses to believe in magic after meeting a lightning-spewing witch, but he still thinks a broken chain letter will bring bad luck.
  • Genre Savvy: He's aware of his Bad Boss tendencies in a crossover, and seems to be more receptive to other people's ideas and regrets having said Well, Excuse Me, Princess! to Lupa.
  • Hypocritical Humor: The Critic complains bitterly about the frequent spelling errors in the map. Note that Doug has, in the past, spelt "Nostalgia Critic" incorrectly in his reviews and manages to mess up the spelling in the credits of Suburban Knights.
  • Innocent Fanservice Boy: Until it was pointed out to him, he had no idea that he was wearing such a... revealing costume.
    • Reluctant Fanservice Boy: According to Iron Liz, Doug requested strongly on the first day that nobody look up his skirt. But due to wind and an apparently ungainly falling over, everyone did.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Film Brain, Ma-Ti and (to a lesser extent) 8-Bit Mickey get treated badly, but he listens to his team, sulkingly accepts the "lady lessons" Lupa teaches him and worries about the others when he realizes that the Big Bad is tracking them. He's also VERY upset about the death of his comrade.
  • Man in a Kilt: Yes, one more skirt trope.
  • Mean Boss: He starts off like this to everyone but he's nicer when he's with his team. But his treating Ma-Ti badly comes back to bite him in the ass. Hard.
  • Mr. Vice Guy: Oblivious, greedy, bitchy, bratty as hell... but still sympathetic and ultimately a good man.
  • Nice Hat: Link's hat in place of his regular cap.
  • Papa Wolf: After seeing Malachite effortlessly blow up people, he looks back at his team and is the first to confront him. It doesn't work, but it's the thought that counts.
  • Real Men Wear Pink: He claims that his outfit is "a manly costume."
  • Screams Like a Little Girl: Repeatedly, once the Witch shows her Red Eyes, Take Warning. Iron Liz and Linkara's commentary says that they were on the other end of the trail about half a mile away and could still hear him doing it.
  • Stripperiffic: That skirt is mini and the boots are short for no reason. Well, maybe one or two reasons...
    • According to the commentary, Doug was both freezing and sunburned everywhere. So it wasn't practical in real life either.
  • Throw the Dog a Bone: After his Despair Event Horizon, he gets to have a Eureka Moment about the map and then he's one of the happiest to see Suede back.
  • Well, Excuse Me, Princess!: Says this to Lupa, then promptly tells the party to never let him say it again.
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: He makes Chester search for the necronomicon because he really is desperate to a) not accept death and b) get Ma-Ti back.

The Nostalgia Chick as Arwen

Played by: Lindsay Ellis

  • Betty and Veronica: It's in the background, but she's (intentionally done, Lindsay said in the commentary) Ship Teased with Critic, Benzaie and Jew Wario. As we know, Critic's the femme, bratty, fucked up ball of need, while Jew Wario and Benzaie both prove to be men she can cling to and offer silent support. But in the end, those two seem to have lost.
  • Bilingual Bonus: In part one, the Chick says a line in gaelic- "pog ma thoin" (kiss my ass) which is translated as "it's cool".
  • Bishie Sparkle: More like Bishie White Flash.
  • Call Back; In her Top 11 Embarrassing and Nostalgic Dance Crazes video, she puts The Macarena in Number 1.
  • Confusion Fu: Her weaponized montages are this; she circles the enemy, waving her arms and babbling to sufficiently confuse them before punching them in the face. Lampshaded by Todd and Bennet.
  • Deadpan Snarker
  • Dull Surprise: It's especially obvious during the scenes in Doug's house and the elf montage sections (though the former was justified by Lindsay, as she felt the Chick would not care about the whole "being duped again" and be bored).
    • In the elf scenes, it's worth noting that the character she's playing was also noted for this, so it could be intentional.
  • Fun with Subtitles
  • Gratuitous Elvish
  • Innocent Fanservice Girl: In her first close-up inside Doug's house (before they all dress up), she showcases quite some cleavage, which Lindsay said to not have noticed before watching.
  • Must Have Caffeine: In all the pre-Arwen scenes, she's drinking coffee.
  • The Stoic: Most of the time she's not really bothered by anything.
    • Not So Stoic: She's visibly distressed by the idea of Malachite getting his gauntlet back ("From the sound of it, everyone's gonna be screwed if he gets a hold of it!"), and is clinging to Jew Wario and teary-eyed during Ma-Ti's funeral.
  • Vitriolic Best Buds: With the Critic. Although they're still snarky and Ship Tease-y, they're a lot less belligerent than they have been before.
  • Waxing Lyrical: While doing her "Arwen Montage" and speaking elvish, she inserts the line, "Chickity China/The Chinese Chicken/Have a drumstick/And your brain stops tickin'."
  • Woman in White: Which was an adaptation of a Fairytale Wedding Dress.

Linkara as King Arthur, as played by Sir Richard Harris

Played by: Lewis Lovhaug

  • Badass Beard: Though he runs out of Sharpie after his first appearance.
    • In the commentary, Doug intended for Linkara's make-up pen beard to last for the entire movie. Linkara was against it, due to both Harris' beard not being black in the movie, and the fact that he would have black smudges on his face on the crossover videos.
  • The Cast Show Off: Once again demonstrates his rather nice singing voice, but he keeps getting interrupted by the others in his group. He finally gets to sing a complete number at the end of Part 7.
  • Chekhov's Gunman: His persistence of a song inadvertantly leads to the Critic learning about the Necronomicon at the end.
  • Chest Insignia: The costume bears the Atop the Fourth Wall hat-brick-fire logo.
  • Combat Pragmatist: After fighting the Guardians for a while with his sword, he exclaims "Screw this!" and pulls out his gun.
  • The Glasses Come Off: Doesn't wear them when in costume.
  • That Reminds Me of a Song: To the annoyance of everyone else.
  • Unexpected Character: Much like Tom, his costume was up for debate and being King Arthur from a musical was never considered. However, this could also be considered a Call Back to his review of Power Rangers Zeo #1, wherein he states that Camelot is his "favorite movie & musical EVER!"

Phelous as Rockbiter

Played by: Phelan Porteous

  • Ax-Crazy: Believes his figurines are alive. 8-bit Mickey thinks he's a little too into character.
    • In Part 2 Mickey questions his belief that his "friends" are real... to which Phelous replies, "They're more real than you are!"
    • In Part 3 he talks to his "little friends" about killing Bennett... in front of Bennett.
  • Becoming the Mask: To a far greater extent than the others. He truly believes that he's the Rockbiter and that his action figures are alive.
    • Subverted in Part 6; he's just really good at staying in character.
  • Character Development: From Kickassia. He went from gleefully strangling the Critic and telling the others to "have fun" as return for all the idea-stealing, to coming out of a funk to protect him and calls him a friend.
  • Companion Cube: He starts treating a pair of action figures as being alive as soon as he puts on the costume.
  • Consulting Mister Puppet: His "little friends."
  • Heroic BSOD: "They look like big, good, strong hands, don't they?"
  • In the Hood
  • This Is Gonna Suck: When the Big Bad walks off an exploding car crash.

Benzaie as Conan the Barbarian

Played by: Benjamin Daniel

Obscurus Lupa as Snow White

Played by: Allison Pregler

Bennett The Sage as Aslan

Played by: Bennett White

Handsome Tom as Willow

Played by: Thomas Hanley

  • A Day in the Limelight: In Part 4 he defeats a witch by pepper-spraying her in the face as she rains down lightning bolts.
  • Demoted to Extra: He's had three lines, one spoken three times, in six episodes.
    • In the commentary, other cast members said he was to have gotten a slightly bigger role, but he begged off, saying "I'm just here to have fun" and doesn't think he's an especially good actor.
  • Fastball Special: Attempts to throw Mickey into battle. Emphasis on "attempts".
  • Gentle Giant
  • Hair Flip
  • Lampshade Hanging: His "I'm Willow" lampshades the fact that most viewers probably aren't familiar with the film.
    • Or that those who are familiar with it wouldn't expect him to be well over six feet tall.
  • Nerves of Steel: When everyone else is freaking out about he Witch, he calmly walks up and pepper sprays her.
  • Precision F-Strike: When the Critic reveals that they've been following a chain letter, he simply says "You fucker".
  • The Quiet One
  • Running Gag: "I'm Willow." (in a video, he even lampshades saying "Basically my only line in this is 'I'm Willow'")
  • Unexpected Character: In-universe and out. No fan even knew who he was, and the team didn't realize who he was until he told them. Mainly because Willow is played by a little person while Tom is incredibly tall.

8-Bit Mickey as Peter Pan

Played by: Michael Paradis

  • Ascended Extra / He Really Can Act: This movie gives him so many more lines, and showcases the emotions he goes through, than in Kickassia. His My Friends... and Zoidberg running jokes from the two first specials is all but forgotten.
  • Berserk Button: Don't point out how similar (i.e. short) he is to Peter Pan or comment on him never growing up.
  • Butt Monkey: In order to get rid of him, The Critic tells Mai-Ti that Mickey has erectile dysfunction and can only get off to goats.
  • Don't Explain the Joke:
    Lupa: [addressing The Critic] Listen here, you skirted little green fairy!
    Mickey: It's funny because she isn't talking about me.
  • Fastball Special: Tries to have Tom use him for this. It fails miserably.
  • Non-Action Guy: So much that after flying around the villain, he says "That's all I got". (though he tries to fight Jaffer's team with a dagger, but the Critic is forced to "borrow" it...)
  • Non Sequitur Thud: After the attempted Fastball Special with Tom.
    Mickey: The current time is 3:55. Thank you for flying Painful Airlines. *thud*

That Dude in the Suede

Played by: William DuFresne

     Group Two 

The Spoony One as Gandalf

Played by: Noah Antwiler

The Cinema Snob as Indiana Jones

Played by: Brad Jones

Angry Joe as Inigo Montoya

Played by: Joe Vargas

Marzgurl as San

Played by: Kaylyn Dicksion

Film Brain as Harry Potter

Played by: Mathew Buck

Luke Mochrie also as Harry Potter

Played by: Luke Mochrie

  • Canada, Eh?/Fake Nationality: He's a Canadian playing a Brit. Luke doesn't see the difference, but Film Brain...
    Film Brain: [Being Canadian]'s as British as being Turkish, you tit!
    Luke: What are you talking aboot?
    Film Brain: It's "about," you twat!
  • Costume Copycat: Debatable. If you look closely, Film Brain wears the costume seen in the first two films, Luke wears the uniform from the remaining films.
  • Professional Butt-Kisser
  • The Rival: For Film Brain.
  • You Would Do the Same for Me: Says this after saving Film Brain, marking the point where their relationship starts to thaw.
    Film Brain: Well now I would!

JewWario as Jareth

Played by: Justin Carmical

Paw Dugan as Profion

Played by: Paul Schuler

Todd in the Shadows as The Dread Pirate Roberts

Played by: Todd Nathanson

  • Blind Mistake: A common result of his mask.
  • Cool Mask: Which somewhat restricts his vision during the fight scene.
  • Dark Is Not Evil: Just as how it was in the original Princess Bride.
  • Deadpan Snarker: Like most of the cast, but he's pretty much the Only Sane Man on his team.
  • Playing with Fire/Pyro Maniac: Was the one who dealt with the cremation.
    Nostalgia Critic: We'd like to thank Todd for handling the cremation, even though I don't think any of us want to know how, or why he did it.
    Todd: *holding a lighter* Yeah, it's probably best you don't ask.
  • Recognition Failure: At first, he thinks the cast didn't know who he was dressed as (even though they have an Inigo Montoya). Then he notices that they aren't recognizing Todd. Presumably the hoodie was his sole identifying mark to them.
  • Translator Buddy: Translates Spoony's high-flown fantasy dialogue into mundane terms for the rest of the group.
  • Vitriolic Best Buds: Apparently with the entire cast. When the Cloaks attack, he tells them to stop because:
    Todd: I barely know these guys, I just do music reviews! I don't even like these people!

    Antagonists 

Malachite

  • Badass
    • Badass Longcoat: He might be evil, but he's got a kick ass coat- long, leather, and still manages to flap in the wind.
  • Berserk Button: His hatred of technology and all those who use and depend on it.
  • Big Bad
  • Black Eyes of Evil
  • Brought Down to Normal: A follow-up vid reveals he has been stripped of his powers and banished to a cafe in Wisconsin where he now works as a server.
  • Bullet Catch: Done with Linkara's gun.
  • Cast From Hitpoints: Magic drains his life force. He starts feeling the effects in Part 5.
  • The Cast Show Off: Orlando Belisle, Jr. is an accomplished martial artist and is able to showcase a lot of his moves in Part 7.
  • Catch Phrase: "What do you think of the 21st century?" Usually said whenever he's talking to someone who refuses to stop using their technological gadgetry.
  • The Chessmaster: Malachite set everything in the story into motion and everyone dances to his tune.
  • Cool Shades
  • Curb-Stomp Battle: Does this to both Jaffers and his group and the TGWTG crew. Of course, they're a bunch of geeks with barely a real weapon between them and he's an immortal Magic Knight.
  • Establishing Character Moment: He is walking in an open field and tries to hitch-hike. He is picked up by a very flighty, materialistic guy, which prompts him to complain about the effects of this century's modern technology on humanity, and eventually kills him with supernatural powers.
  • Evil Luddite: Given his backstory, it's no wonder he loathes all technology.
  • Evil Mentor: Malachite taught Jaffers magic when he tried to trick Jaffers into finding the gauntlet for him.
  • Fate Worse than Death: Malachite was not destroyed. Instead, he was banished to a little corner of Hell known as... the All Around Cafe, in Pleasant Prairie, Wisconsin, where he is a barista and the owner's resident Butt Monkey.
  • The Gift: according to Atop the Fourth Wall, normally any wizard who became evil would eventually lose all powers, but malachite is one of the few exceptions able to somehow ignore that weakness
  • Hellbent For Leather
  • Hidden Agenda Villain: For most of the story it's hard to tell just what his deal is, killing two people for relying on technology and walking around with an evil Leitmotif, but then helping Group 2 by returning their map. Turns out that Malachite couldn't find the gauntlet on his own, so he used the Channel Awesome crew to find it for him, sending the map as a chain letter and putting a tracking spell on it.
  • Home Run Hitter: A Megaton Punch throws Jaffers away, and a finger flick turns Spoony into A Twinkle in the Sky.
  • Hypocrite: He has an EVO 4G. Oddly, he specifically states he's not a hypocrite.
    • It's implied that he doesn't even know what the word 'hypocrite' actually means (and doesn't care to find out.)
  • Implacable Man: A car hits him and explodes as he crosses the street. It blows up and he continues on normally.
  • The Juggernaut
  • Knight of Cerebus: Any time he's onscreen, things get grim.
  • Ludd Was Right: His perspective is shown to lie here from the very beginning.
  • Meaningful Name: His name is a reference to a green crystal and probably what the crystal that powers the gauntlet is made of.
  • Mundane Utility: Occasionally uses his incredible, earth shattering magic powers to do things like... pick up his fallen hat.
  • Nice Hat: He sports a sweet fedora. It's also the only part of him that makes it.
  • Nietzsche Wannabe
  • No Body Left Behind
  • Offscreen Teleportation
  • Omnicidal Maniac: It's implied a few times that he may not be as hypocritical as Team TGWTG think he is and may have just been after the destruction of the world out of revenge for not being the founder of modern civilisation.
  • Really 700 Years Old
  • Scary Black Man
  • Simple Staff
  • Spell My Name with an "S": The special shows his name as both Malecite in the actor credit and Malachite elsewhere. Given Doug's propensity for misspelling words, it is unknown at this point which is the correct spelling (though probably "Malachite", which is an actual word and makes it a Meaningful Name.
  • Spin to Deflect Stuff: Done with the bullets shot by Joe and Lupa's machine guns.
  • The Stoic
  • The Unsmile: After he's banished to the All-Around Cafe he's forced to smile for the customers, but is only capable of giving one of these.
  • Vile Villain, Saccharine Show: The world of That Guy With The Glasses is by no means a happy-go-lucky land, and the special is no exception. But he's still a mar more imposing and sinister villain than you would expect from the site's productions, and a fair larger body count than other villains before the credits roll.
  • Would Hit a Girl: He's an equal opportunity bad guy. Though in Nostalgia Chick's case he allows a switch for a stunt double, Nella.
  • You Keep Using That Word: He apparently doesn't understand what a word "hypocrite" really means.

Chuck Jaffers

Played by: Rob Walker
  • Go Mad from the Revelation: He was heard raving about Malachite's Hand in the days leading up to his disappearance.
  • Harmless Villain: Ultimately. When you're so pathetic that you make the Critic look competent in comparison, you know you're in trouble.
  • Hero Antagonist: Jaffers just wants to keep Malachite from the gauntlet and thinks the reviewers aren't worthy guardians. Nevermind that he's blatantly incompetent and that the TGWTG crew massively outnumbers Jaffers' group, which means they might have a slightly better chance of guarding the gauntlet.
  • Hollywood Nerd
  • Imperial Stormtrooper Marksmanship Academy: He completely misses everyone in Team 1 at point blank range!
  • Knight in Shining Armor
  • Knight Templar: After hearing how The Internet Is for Porn, he decides Channel Awesome can't possibly be pure enough for his purposes.
  • Loners Are Freaks: Subverted, he is actually a perfect normal person(even if a little odd due to being from the past), who is perfectly aware Dungeons & Dragons is just a game, and even comments that he started to get suspicious when Malachite seemed to take the search for malachite's hand as real.
  • Madlibs Catch Phrase: "A little too <adjective>..."
  • New-Age Retro Hippie
  • Posthumous Character: Presumably; he's been missing for just over 30 years before the special began. Turns out he was just sealed in a book.
  • Sealed Good In A Book: Though technically a good guy in that he's against Malachite, he's an antagonist to the Channel Awesome crew for deciding they aren't worthy of finding the gauntlet.
  • Shadow Archetype: Personality-wise, he's Critic without the likability.
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: Critics deemed not worthy of protecting the Malachite Hand? Kill them all.
  • What Happened to the Mouse?: When Malachite sends Spoony flying into the air, he eventually falls back on the battlefield. Jaffers, meanwhile, never reappears. Then again, he did get shot up instead of at an angle...
    • Also, note that Spoony is only finger flicked into the air, while Jaffers is sent flying with a Megaton Punch.

The Last Angry Geek, Jim Jarosz, and Iron Liz as The Cloaks

Played by: Brian Heinz, James Jarosz, and Elizabeth Skochil

Cat

Played by: Dave Myers

Witch Warrior/The Good Witch Of The Woods

Played by: N. Cardena

The Voice of the Ancient World

Voiced by: James Rolfe

     Supporting Cast 

Ma-Ti (from Captain Planet)

Played by: Bhargav Dronamraju

Bill

Played by: James Troken

The Gate Cleaner

Played by: Noah Antwiler

Crom

Voiced by: Jason Pullara

  • The Cameo
  • Jerkass: Crom sees anyone who openly prays to him as a weakling. Benzaie is very lucky Crom didn't smite him on the spot, as Crom has done in those cases.
  • Unexpected Character: Not as much as Suede, but he did leave the site earlier in 2011 prior to filming the special, so it was unclear if he'd make an appearance or not.

Elisa

Played by Elisa Hansen

That Guy With the Glasses

Played by: Doug Walker

Aeon

Nella

Played by: Antonella Inserra
  • Butt Monkey: It's Nella, what do you expect?
  • Stunt Double: She'll gladly cover the Chick's stunts, even putting her own life on the line!
  • Written-In Infirmity: Lindsay said she would be "my Patsy", but as Nella couldn't get enough time off work, it was reduced to a cameo.

Larry Prince

Played by: Barney Walker

KickassiaCharacterSheets/Web VideoTo Boldly Flee

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