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"The alphabet is terrifying. A bee sea? No thanks we're good."
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Sometimes languages have stupid rules or regulations that make you think "who the hell came up with this?"

This trope happens when a language is just plain lazy.

Puns are usually formed by taking two similar-sounding words and using them to subvert expectations. Some words, however, are so simple that they sound basically identical to something kids learn in preschool.

To make this joke, take a word that sounds like a letter and replace the word with that letter. Alternatively, this can work with words that sound like numbers as well (even 9/nein for some German flair). This kind of joke is much easier to pull off in media targeted at little kids, as their vocabulary is usually limited to just letters, numbers, and simple words, and therefore it's seen as peak comedy by them and more likely to get laughs.

Subtrope of Fun with Homophones. Compare Heh Heh, You Said "X".


Examples:

    open/close all folders 

    Comedy 
  • Jeff Foxworthy has a bit called "The Alphabet Story" where he uses each letter of the alphabet to replace a similar-sounding word or syllable. For example:
    "A there, dudes. I'm-a tell you a story you might not B-lieve. 'Cause you C...'bout a friend of mine, he's from D-troit. And I'm-a tell you somethin' 'bout him: E's crazy."

    Comic Strips 
  • Peanuts: In a Sunday Strip from the 1980s, Sally is writing letters of the alphabet and describing them to Linus. But she misinterprets his comments as letters: For instance, when Linus says, "I see," Sally says she's not writing I's and C's. At the end, Sally is writing U's, but Linus says, "They don't look like me at all," prompting Sally to throw her paper and pencil at him.

    Films - Live-Action 

    Jokes 
  • A classic joke plays on this phenomenon: "Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven Eightnote  Nine!"
  • A very common joke you'll often find among children is when someone says "two too" it sounds like "tu-tu", which to young kids is usually viewed as a terrible fashion choice and is therefore funny (most often heard when someone is expressing their want for two of something after someone else already has).
  • Another common little kid joke is being asked to spell "Icup".note 
    • A more adult version asks someone to look under their shirt and spell "attic".note 
  • Do you know why "A" is like a flower?
    Because a "B" is after it.
  • A woman is shown with a sore nose. A man asks her how she got it, and she replies that she got it smelling a "brose". He says, "There's no 'B' in 'rose'," and she replies, "There was in that one".
  • Why did the bee keep his legs crossed? Because he couldn't find a BPnote  station.
  • Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the "P" is silent.
  • One joke sign common at pools: "Welcome to the OOL. Notice there is no 'P'. Please keep it that way."
  • What's Fonzie's favourite vitamin? Anote .
  • My grandfather died before he could tell us his blood type. His last words were "Be positive".
  • Why couldn't the pirate take his kids to the movie? Because it was rated "Arr!"
  • Why can't pirates learn the alphabet? They always get lost at C.

    Literature 
  • The children's books CDB and CDC by William Steig are entirely composed of puns formed by letters that spell out a sentence (e.g., "see the bee" in the title).
  • Diary of a Wimpy Kid:
    • In the first book, a boy named Preston Mudd is named athlete of the month. However, his poster lists him as "P. Mudd", and it only took people about 5 seconds to figure out what that sounds like when you say it out loud.
    • Additionally, in Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules, a kid named Peter Uteger was said to be the only kid who broke the "last-name rule", a rule where kids with last names that started with letters earlier in the alphabet got called on more by the teacher, and therefore were smarter. However, once people found out what Peter's initials sounded like out loud, it was over for him. Nowadays, he doesn't raise his hand at all, and he's pretty much a C-student.
  • Dirty Bertie: In one book, Bertie tells Eugene to help him cheat during the spelling bee by giving him clues, "Like if the letter's I, point to your eye."
    Eugene: "But what if the letter's P?"
  • In the kids' book E-mergency, there are many such jokes due to the characters being anthropomorphic letters:
    • Y asks a lot of questions.
    • P is seen peeing twice.
    • E is heard exclaiming, "Ee!" and O exclaiming, "Oh!".
    • B once says, "Just be."
    • T says, "Gee!" to G.
    • At one point, the letters spell, "R U OK?"
    • N once tells P and U ("PU") not to sit together.
  • Roys Bedoys: In "Y is Not for Why, Roys Bedoys!", Roys forgets to bring something to school for a Y-themed Show and Tell, so he sings, "Why, why, tell me why" over and over again, to the annoyance of his classmates and teacher.
  • Treehouse: In the 9th installment of the series, The 117-Story Treehouse, the Filing Monster gets hired by Mr. Big Nose, to which the monster is happy since his new job starts with "P", one of his favorite letters. Then, Terry snickers, chuckling at what the letter "P" sounds like.

    Live-Action TV 
  • The Big Bang Theory: After Sheldon explains to Penny that "AFK" means "away from keyboard," she responds with, "Oh, I see," prompting Sheldon to ask, "What does that stand for?"
  • Blackadder The Third: In the episode Ink And Incapability, when trying to restore the seemingly destroyed Johnson's Dictionary, Baldrick only manages to write two definitions, one of which is "C". Definition: Big blue wobbly thing mermaids live in.
  • The Singing Off Catchphrase on Cool Kids Cooking is "CKC you soon!".
  • Get Smart: In "Mr. Big", Max asks a little boy if he's "99" since he's asked to meet up with Agent 99, but doesn't know what she looks like. The boy replies, "No; I'm six and a half".
  • The Mickey Mouse Club the "Alma Mater" version of the Mickey Mouse March has a pair of these in the final spelling of Mickey's name. "M-I-C (See you real soon) K-E-Y (Why? Because we like you.)"

    Music 
  • Songdrops:
    • One song goes, "I Love U, it's My Favourite Letter".
    • One of the Ruder and Cruder songs featured on the singer's other channel, Songzaps, is titled "Sofa Q" note  and another is "If You See Kay"note 

    Poetry 
  • The kids' poem "Swimming in the swimming pool is where I like to 'B'. Wearing underwater goggles so that I can 'C'. Yesterday, before I swam, I drank a cup of 'T'. Now the pool's a swimming 'ool, because I took a 'P'.”

    Puppet Shows 
  • Sesame Street often does this, since it does a lot of song parodies based around letters and numbers:
    • U/you is particularly common, including "I Get a Kick Out of U", "I'm in Love With U" (parodying "Indian Love Song"), "Thinking of U", "Like the Way U Does" (parody of "Like the Way I Do" actually performed by Melissa Etheridge) "U Really Got a Hold on Me" (actually performed by Smokey Robinson) and "What Makes U Useful" (parody of "What Makes You Beautiful" actually performed by One Direction).
    • In one skit, Ernie gets stung by a B instead of a bee.
    • Harvey Kneeslapper's main shtick is making some kind of pun on a letter or a number, and then sticking a sticker of that letter onto the other person. For instance, a "Knock Knock" Joke with the punchline "Deon you!" had him stick a D on the guy.
    • One Don Music sketch has him struggle to remember the alphabet song, only for people to come around and say things that remind him of it. For instance, when he forgets what comes after "F", Kermit says, "Gee, Mr. Music!".
    • In one cartoon skit, a little boy finds himself in a place themed around the letter B. He says, "Gee!", and someone tells him, "Not 'G'; it's B!".
    • In "Abby in Wonderland", an Alice in Wonderland parody, characters have a T party, where they eat the letter T.
    • In a "Salty and Pierre" skit, Pierre misunderstands "two twos" as "tutus" and starts dancing in a tutu.

    Theatre 
  • Hamlet: In Act 3 Scene 2, in a conversation filled with puns and Double Entendre, keep in mind that the word "Aye" is pronounced just like the letter I.
    Ophelia: You are merry, my lord.
    Hamlet: Who, I?
    Ophelia: Aye, my lord.
  • Matilda: "The School Song" phonetically works every letter of the alphabet into its lyrics, which becomes more obvious in the second verse when they begin emphasizing the letter sounds to mock the students for wanting to learn the alphabet, i.e. "So you think you're A-ble to survive this mess by B-ing a prince or a princess, you will soon C there's no escaping trageD."

    Video Games 
  • Moshi Monsters: At one point, Gabby mentions talking to Dr. Strangeglove "2 C" what he wants.
  • 3 in Three: The game takes place in a computer, and all the characters are Anthropomorphic Typography. This results in a Who's on First? routine when 3 meets the vowels.
    A: And, as you know, only the A can form a one letter word!
    I: Hey, what about I?
    A: What about you?
    U: Someone call me?
    A: Oh be quiet!
    O: I didn't say anything.

    Web Animation 
  • Alphabet Lore: Y's whole gimmick; it was literally her first line. When X died, Y screamed "YYYYYYYYY?!"
  • ASDF Movie: Provides the page image. One sketch has a guy shouting "Oh no, a giant B!" while pointing at a giant version of the letter "B". Then, a giant bee flies down and eats him whole.
  • Battle for BFDI: In the episode Enter the Exit, in an effort to bring back Four, Bottle dresses as a golfer, hits Golf Ball with a club, and shouts "FOUR!!!"note 
  • Battle for Dream Island: The Power of Two: In The Great Goikian Bake Off, when team Just Not exclaims to Golf Ball that they want to be big again, Golf Ball deduces that they "want TWO go back TWO normal". Then, on cue, Two shows up and scales Just Not back up to regular size.
  • Lucas the Spider: In the episode Lucas The Pirate, the intro has Lucas in his pirate outfit saying "What's your favorite letter? Mine's Rrrrrr!"

    Webcomics 
  • In one installment of The Perry Bible Fellowship, a doctor points to the big letter E on a vision chart, but there's a bee landed right next to his pointer, so the kid says "Bee." The doctor thinks his vision is beyond repair and takes him in for eye surgery.

    Websites 

    Web Videos 
  • Pokétuber MandJTV (the creator of Pokémon Talk)'s video of a competition with his friend PM7 where they have to catch a Pokémon for every letter of the alphabet has this joke, and it actually uses two examples. MandJTV asks PM7 "what's a pirate's favorite letter" and PM7 answers "Rrrrrr!" to which MandJTV responds with "One might think that, but a pirate's first love has always been the C!"
  • In a video by the YouTuber Oats Jenkins called I Fixed the Alphabet, he makes a rule where if a word is pronounced the same as a letter, just spell it as that letter (e.g. spell "tea" as "t").

    Western Animation 
  • Alphablocks:
    • In one episode, they try to sing the Alphabet Song, but when they sing, "A", "B", C says, "A bee? Where? I can't see a bee?". Then, when they get to "C", "D", B says, "Of course I can see D! He's right here!".
    • Several Running Gags involve I saying sentences that begin with "I" the pronoun, J thinking she's a jay, T drinking tea, and Y always asking why.
    • In one episode, S, U, and M spell out "SUM". S asks M what seven plus one is, and he replies, "Eight". However, they think he's saying he ate the blackboard, so they reply, "We know!".
  • The Amazing World of Gumball: In "The Skull", as Gumball, Darwin, and Clayton are chased by a hulking guy with the titular skull for a face, Clayton decides to do plan B... literally, as he puts it. He then turns into a swarm of bees to distract the skull guy.
  • Animaniacs: In one episode, Dr. Sratchansniff hosts a game of Bingo. Wakko, who's the only player, keeps mistaking letter combinations for words, and words for letter combinations.
    Scratchansniff: Stop! Now you're cheating.
    Wakko: G-10? Bingo!
  • Arthur: In "Jenna's Bedtime Blues", Jenna is sleeping in her friend Muffy's bed and is worried she'll wet the bed. To get her mind off her worry, she tries watching TV, but the programs she puts on remind her of urination. At one point, she sees a kids' show saying, "Can you say, 'P'?!".
  • In the Looney Tunes short Dumb Patrol, Bugs Bunny sent Sam a note with the word "Baron" being spelt with a little "b". He enclosed a big "BEE" in the flowers.
  • In the Futurama episode "Love and Rocket," Fry marvels at the rather basic wordplay written on candy hearts at a factory.
    "Whoa! Letters like U and R can mean words like 'you' and 'are!' Here, Leela—'U-R-2 Cute!'"
  • Numberjacks: One episode is titled "One Won".
  • Phineas and Ferb: In the song "Humiliating Stumblegimp Dance of Contrition" from the episode One Good Turn, the singer is yelling about how he will not speak French, and then he paints a big red number 9 on a poster and yells "Nein!"
  • Pinky and the Brain: In "Where No Mouse Has Gone Before", Pinky and the Brain are posing as scientists to get into a NASA space center so Brain can install a plaque of himself on a rocket. After Pinky makes an idiotic remark, Brain tells him, "From now on, Pinky, whatever anyone asks you, just say 'Ja' or 'Nein.'" Later, with the countdown at three, Brain has installed the plaque and is about to run under the rocket to rejoin Pinky.
    Brain: Did you hear the countdown, Pinky?
    Pinky: Ja!
    Brain: What number are they down to?
    Pinky: Nein!
    Brain: Nine?
    Pinky: Ja!
    Brain: Excellent! Plenty of time.
    [He runs under the rocket. It ignites, leaving Brain's entire body covered with ashes.]
  • Steven Universe: In "Uncle Grandpa," when the Crystal Gems decide to run away from Uncle Grandpa, the words "RUN AWAY!" appear in big letters at the bottom of the screen. Amethyst trips over the "y" in "away" and exclaims, "Whyyyyyyyyy?"
  • Wander over Yonder: Combined with T-Word Euphemism in "The Flower". Wander and Sylvia are looking for a safe planet to plant a flower, but each one they find is too dangerous, including numerous encounters with giant bees. This leads to this exchange when Lord Dominator appears.
    Wander: Is it another bee?
    Sylvia: Biggest Bnote  in the galaxy — Dominator!
  • What's with Andy?: In "Busting", Andy is having a Potty Emergency, and is bothered by a little boy struggling to remember what letter comes after "P" in the alphabet.
  • An episode of Yogi's Treasure Hunt has Top Cat give Yogi and his friends their assignment and the riddle that they'll find the treasure as easy as "ABC's". After nearly an entire episode of misadventure, including a battle with a swarm of bees, Yogi thinks over the riddle. He then realizes that they'll find the treasure as easy as "a bee sees". The treasure is in the tree with the beehive.

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