Because it's considered that Bigger Is Better in Bed
, those men that have smaller genitalia are considered Acceptable Hard Luck Targets
. This is almost always Played for Laughs
, since Naked People Are Funny
It is often implied that people with a small penis are Compensating for Something
It is one of the few body image tropes that is Always Male
Possibly one of the reasons that Male Frontal Nudity
is not common, since Most Writers Are Male
. This is mostly a Take Our Word for It
trope. Can be a part of a Humiliation Conga
or Shameful Strip
. "It's cold in here!" may be invoked as a (Truth in Television
Inverse of Gag Penis
. Contrast Biggus Dickus
. A-Cup Angst
could be considered a Distaff Counterpart
No Real Life Examples, Please!
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Anime and Manga
- It is implied that 14-year-old Shinji has a small penis in Neon Genesis Evangelion. He runs out of the bathroom completely naked, having been scared by Misato's pet penguin while in the bath. As he runs out, his genitalia is covered by a small carton of toothpicks in the foreground. Misato asks him to "cover that up" and he quickly does so.
- While deliberately low-res, the final battle of Rebuild of Evangelion 1.0 does give us a brief monochrome shot of a naked Shinji that confirms his equipment is indeed unremarkable.
- Japan in Axis Powers Hetalia, according to Italy. "... Japanese people grower, not shower."
- Apparently, Takamura from Hajime No Ippo. It would certainly explain why he and the other boxers tease and bully Ippo, as well as his penchant for pranking people in the shower. (Which hilariously backfires when his victim is Sendoh of all people.)
- Kip McDowell of Green Blood. An entire arc is started after he kills a prostitute for calling him "cute."
- As Sanageyama challenges Ryuko to a rematch despite his present lack of clothing in the sixth episode of Kill la Kill, Mako decides to take measurements. She does not find impressive results◊.
- The producer who takes over Cherry Comics in "Cherry Gets It in the End (And Mom Does Too!)" is portrayed as having a comically small penis.
- There's one Underground Comics strip parodying ElfQuest. "Fluffer Nutter" lives with his family in the modern world, spends most of his time boozing and abuses his family. When Treestump's expy calls him out why he's so pissed despite being rich and famous, he shouts what the whole strip has been a build-up for, it seems: "I've got a teeny weeny pini!"
- In the furry comic Cruelty, Tobias is said to be pretty small—even for a feline! Whether or not that's true is not confirmed.
- In the 2000 remake of Bedazzled, Brendan Fraser's character is transformed into a huge sexy basketball player... who has laughably small equipment.
- Scary Movie
- Girls Will Be Girls: Evie's son, which she mentions to prospective girlfriends.
- The Swedish-made Penis Enlarger is a running gag in Austin Powers.
- Tank Girl is captured by one of the W & P soldiers, who intends to force her to fellate him at gunpoint.
Tank Girl: Well, okay. But I'm gonna need a microscope. And some tweezers.
- Porky's has a team of boys out to get laid. It's no secret that their equipment comes in varying size, with this end being taken by Pee Wee.
- Foxy Brown has the title character and a friend pose as High Class Call Girls to allow them to get upclose to a corrupt judge at a hotel sex party. After they strip him before sex, they immediately point and laugh at his genitals, asking him if there was a meat shortage. He laughs and plays along thinking this is all just part of the foreplay, until he's pushed out of the room naked into the hallway crowded with people, and they tell him to take his wet noodle somewhere else while they go find a real man to please them.
- The central gag of the mostly-disdained Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star.
- In No Holds Barred, a redneck wrestler mocks the miniscule manhoods of two of the Corrupt Corporate Executive's accomplices in the Bad-Guy Bar's bathroom.
- The tragic events in Unforgiven began when Delilah, a prostitute, laughed at Quick Mike's small penis, which enraged the cowboy enough to cut her up. This sets off a whole chain of Disproportionate Retribution steps which ultimately end in bloodshed.
- The main character's "tiny schmeckle" is a running gag in Click.
- As part of MacGruber's marketing some nude photos were released showing his tiny member.
- This is part-and-parcel with a Running Gag in Deuce Bigalow Male Gigolo, with the stubborn detective trying to out Deuce's prostitution. It also gets coupled with Insistent Terminology.
Detective: It's not small, it's thin!
- In the 2001 TV movie Wolf Girl, one of the bullies who has been tormenting the titular character (A sideshow freak) is glimpsed through a window as he stands naked in front of a full-length mirror. The trope applies: it's suggested that he could be a sideshow freak himself, by this measure alone.
- In Another Gay Movie main character Jarod has a small penis. He finds an almost steampunk-looking penis enlarger in a friend's dad's bathroom and tries it out, resulting in a comically stretched out member.
- This is the premise of the documentary Unhung Hero, wherein the star's ex-girlfriend rejected his marriage proposal on the grounds that his penis isn't big enough. The documentary itself strives to answer the question if size really matters, and the star goes on something of a journey of self-discovery and overcoming his insecurities.
- A man was trying to come up with a computer password, so he typed in "mypenis". The password creation failed, saying "Error: too small"
- A joke that involves knowing the name of a male member of your audience - let's use John Smith here:
Three Irish midgets were sitting in a bar, trying to figure out a way to make money. The first said "I have small hands - I'll write to the Guinness Book of World Records and see if I have the smallest hands!" The second said "I have small feet - I'll write to the Guinness Book of World Records and see if I have the smallest feet!" The first said "I have a small penis - I'll write to the Guinness Book of World Records and see if I have the smallest penis!" So they all wrote in. A week later they all received letters and they gathered at the bar to open them together. The first opened up his envelope and pulled out a big check exclaiming "I have the smallest hands!" The second opened up his envelope and pulled out a big check exclaiming "I have the smallest feet!" The third opened up his envelope and pulled out a letter. As he read it he got more and more red-faced and finally exclaimed "WHO THE HELL IS JOHN SMITH????"
- Dancer from the Dance: Sutherland's small penis is mentioned a few times.
- In Anne Lamott's Bird By Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life, she recommends that in order to avoid lawsuits when writing a Captain Ersatz of a real man who might want to sue, give the character a tiny penis and the real man will never step forward and claim that's him.
- In Behaving Bradley, one character acquires the nickname "Microdick" after the boys have to strip for swim class in the locker room. Later on, innocent Brainless Beauty Hopie asks Bradley what the nickname means, and he tells her that it's because the boy in question wants to become a disc jockey and use a microphone. Hopie responds, "Oh. I thought it had something to do with his penis."
- Sisterhood Series by Fern Michaels: John Chai in the book Vendetta, who is being used to represent Yellow Peril, is revealed to have this. Nikki and Alexis ask Yoko if it is true that Chinese men have a Teeny Weenie, and Yoko, giggling, confirms this.
- The working title of Piers Anthony's Pornucopia was 3.97 Erect for a reason.
- In Angry Lead Skies, when Garrett and his allies take some of the "silver elves" prisoner and remove their clothing to hinder them from escaping, the captured males are found to have extremely shrunken genitals, "like mummies". It's implied that the "silver elves" are aliens that reproduce by cloning, and restrict their reproductive systems' development to suppress sexual impulses which they consider atavistic.
- While most of his male characters were well-hung, Sidney Sheldon liked to make his pitiful ones suffer from this—the cuckolded husband of Eve, Keith (in Master of the Game) is said to have one.
- A one hit wonder artist known as Gillette did a song called Short Dick Man.
- At the end of the Hollywood Undead video "Everywhere I Go", the chorus of which repeatedly mentions Charlie Scene's "weenie" and how he loves to show it off, Mr. Scene is actually shown whipping it out. Similar to his face in the opening of the video, it's censored with a drawing of his mask which appears to take up just enough space to cover up a nickel.
- Slipped into the end of Kesha's "Thinking Of You," verbatim.
- Bob Rivers recorded "Three Inch Tool", a parody of Hootie & the Blowfish's "Only Wanna Be With You".
- The humor group "El Takititá" made a Spanish parody of the song "Rudolph the red-nosed reindeeer", only that instead of the red nose the problem of Rodolfo was having a cheese-poof sized dick. Santa Claus helped with his problem by gifting Rodoldo a corncob to use as a replacement, but then Rodolfo engages in a passionate affair and the corn becomes popcorn.
- Bill Engvall has a segment about surfing. The instructor, a typical Surfer Dude, tells him "We'll have you hanging ten in no time." "Not without elective surgery. Because the word 'hung' has never been associated with Engvall men." Later on, he says that when he puts on the wet suit, it looks like he's trying to smuggle a Slim Jim and two cherries.
- The Bible: The Complete Word of God (abridged) opens with the three players wearing nothing more than a fig leaf each. One of the fig leaves is noticeably smaller than the other two.
- The play The Irish Curse dealt with a support group for the condition.
- Madame Thenardier on her husband in her verse of "Master of the House": "Thinks he's quite a lover, but there's not much there!"
- In The Bare Pit, a male invites women over to his pool to skinny dip, while he's secretly recording them in order to upload the footage and sell it on the Internet. However the video is intercepted by someone else who splices the footage to remove all traces of the woman and leaves only the shots of him naked, and releases it over the Internet. The next day at school he's humiliated when not only is his reputation as a romantic playboy completely shot, he also has to deal with his new nickname "Inchworm."
- In Mac Hall, Micah's ex-girlfriend posts something embarrassing about his penis in her blog. His current girlfriend Helen tries to console him by saying "I think it's cute." (It doesn't help.)
- Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal:
- Cuthwald of NSFW Comix, two and a half inches when erect, orders every penis enlargement remedy he's e-mailed on 4Chan, mixes them together in a bathtub, summarily drinks it all and becomes so large it exits the universe, kills God, and skull fucks the reader. It's back to being tiny again later.
- According to Thor in this Brathalla, Balder has one.
- South Park has done this a few times:
- In one episode, Osama bin Laden is shown to have an absurdly microscopic penis.
Cartman: So that's what this is all about!
- "T.M.I." has the idea of compensating for a small penis as its entire premise. It turns out that all of the angry people in the world are just pissed off because they're below the average length. To fix the problem, the "average length" is shortened (although, ironically, Cartman still doesn't make the cut).
- In an early Pokémon-centric episode, the Japanese creators keep talking about how small their penises are as opposed the well-endowed Americans. One woman calls them out on this, saying that they're only saying this to distract the male Americans. While this is true, one of the creators proves that he's not lying about the size of his penis, either. One of said creators also uses the "your penis so big" line on a woman, causing the other creator to smack him upside the head for the screw up.
- In the episode "Ginger Cow", the appearance of a red cow leads to peace in the Middle East. To keep Cartman from revealing the truth that the cow is a fake and ruin everything, Kyle agrees to do whatever he asks. When Stan tries to maintain the charade by saying that it really was a miracle, a rabbi notes that the prophecy actually stated a fat child with a small penis would decorate a cow to look ginger, not that one would miraculously just fall from the sky. As everyone is ready to return to fighting, Kyle tells them that the prophecy really was fulfilled. When he tries to get Cartman to back him up, Cartman says he can't lie: he has a huge dick.
- Robot Chicken had a bit with two people standing in a hallway. The woman pulls a hotdog out of a bun and throws it at the door at the end.
Woman: Do ya see the problem here?
Man: Yeah, that hallway is like bizarrely huge.
- In the Beavis and Butt-Head episode "Sporting Goods," the duo tried to buy protective cups, but the smallest ones were still too big. The sporting goods owner gave them a couple of racquetball eyepatches for free, which fit them perfectly. Daria walked in, saw them walking out of the dressing rooms wearing the patches, did a double take, and snapped a photo for the school newspaper.
Daria: Wow! Even smaller than I thought!
- In the Futurama episode "Benderama", the crew has to deliver personal hygiene supplies to an ugly giant. He is 50 feet tall, and while most of his body parts are enormous, one part...isn't.
Amy: Colossal tooth whitener, mega deodorant, humungous acne cream...awwww...and one regular size condom.
Bender: All that and a small weiner? This guy's got it goin' on!