HATE..! HATE..! HATE..! HATE! HATE! HATE-HATE-HATE-HATEHATEHATEHATEHAAAATE!!!
— Suruga Kanbaru, Bakemonogatari
Time for school... a lesson in the school of life, eh?
Well a hush fell over the pool room, Jimmy come boppin' in off the street
And when the cuttin' was done the only part that wasn't bloody was the soles of the big man's feet
He'd been cut in 'bout a hundred places and he was shot in a couple more
And you'd better believe they sung a different kind of story when Big Jim hit the floor!
And when the cuttin' was done the only part that wasn't bloody was the soles of the big man's feet
He'd been cut in 'bout a hundred places and he was shot in a couple more
And you'd better believe they sung a different kind of story when Big Jim hit the floor!
— Jim Croce, "You Don't Mess Around With Jim"
Ah yes, I was wondering what would break first: your spirit, or your body!
You know, normally I hate to kick a guy when he's down on his luck, but... with you, I don't give a damn. You killed my friends and countless innocent bystanders, so don't expect any mercy.
—Jotaro Kujo to DIO, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders
Steely Dan: Please, I beg of you! Forgive me!
Jotaro: Ask for forgiveness from Enya, the woman you killed. But as for me, I never had the slightest intention of forgiving you.
Steely Dan: D-Dio paid me to cause this madness... you can have it all!
Jotaro: Good grief... I know this is blatantly obvious, but you really are a piece of work. What you owe me... can never be paid back with money!
Star Platinum: ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!
Jotaro: Ask for forgiveness from Enya, the woman you killed. But as for me, I never had the slightest intention of forgiving you.
Steely Dan: D-Dio paid me to cause this madness... you can have it all!
Jotaro: Good grief... I know this is blatantly obvious, but you really are a piece of work. What you owe me... can never be paid back with money!
Star Platinum: ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!
D'Arby: Please, mercy, I beg you! I've already given you back Kakyoin's soul, haven't I? It's like they say, no harm, no foul! We're good... right? Right? Right?
Jotaro: You want to know whether I'll forgive you, why don't you just do what you do best and read my mind? No! No! No! No! No! [...] Answer this. Will I hit you with my right fist or decide to deck you with my left? I'd love to know.
D'Arby: Well, since you're asking, you'll use... your right one?
Jotaro: No! No! No! No! No!
D'Arby: Then... your left?
Jotaro: No! No! No! No! No!
D'Arby: You're... not going to use both, are you?
Jotaro: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! YES!
D'Arby: Are you going to do the "ORA ORA" thing?!
Joseph: YES! YES! YES! Oh my God....
[Cue the beatdown]
Narrator: D'Arby Younger, out of commission!
Jotaro: You want to know whether I'll forgive you, why don't you just do what you do best and read my mind? No! No! No! No! No! [...] Answer this. Will I hit you with my right fist or decide to deck you with my left? I'd love to know.
D'Arby: Well, since you're asking, you'll use... your right one?
Jotaro: No! No! No! No! No!
D'Arby: Then... your left?
Jotaro: No! No! No! No! No!
D'Arby: You're... not going to use both, are you?
Jotaro: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! YES!
D'Arby: Are you going to do the "ORA ORA" thing?!
Joseph: YES! YES! YES! Oh my God....
[Cue the beatdown]
Narrator: D'Arby Younger, out of commission!
Giorno: You were close. I drew out my speech in order to buy myself time. The bullet that tore a hole through your head still had to mature before eventually making its way back to the initial wound. The shrapnel that drew it was lodged into your skull and returned to its original form as a beetle. One whose growth I happen to accelerate greatly with Golden Wind when I aimed for the propellers. I wanted to be certain that you were completely neutralized, meaning I had to finish you off. Whether or not I can still hear a heartbeat.
Cioccolata: (unintelligible) B-But you said... th-that if I just stayed still that I-I would still m-make it out of this alive.
Giorno: Oh, give me a break. If you thought I was being serious, then you're the worthless fool. I don't spare pieces of shit!
Cioccolata: Rah... What did you just call me?!
[Cue seven pages of Giorno beating the ever-loving tar out of Cioccolata]
Giorno/Gold Experience: MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA—
Cioccolata: No! No! Nonono! Nonono! Nono!
Giorno/Gold Experience: MUDAAAAAAAAA!
[Giorno smashes Cioccolata into the air and lands him right into a garbage truck.]
Cioccolata: (unintelligible) B-But you said... th-that if I just stayed still that I-I would still m-make it out of this alive.
Giorno: Oh, give me a break. If you thought I was being serious, then you're the worthless fool. I don't spare pieces of shit!
Cioccolata: Rah... What did you just call me?!
[Cue seven pages of Giorno beating the ever-loving tar out of Cioccolata]
Giorno/Gold Experience: MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA—
Cioccolata: No! No! Nonono! Nonono! Nono!
Giorno/Gold Experience: MUDAAAAAAAAA!
[Giorno smashes Cioccolata into the air and lands him right into a garbage truck.]
Tyler: Where'd you go, psycho boy?
Narrator: ...I felt like destroying something beautiful.
Narrator: ...I felt like destroying something beautiful.
I don't understand...! How can this be happening to me... when I've absorbed God?! How can a mere human... a meager Alchemist... with his bare hands?!?
— Father as he is receiving the beating of a lifetime from Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist
There's no escape this time, Basil!
— Professor Ratigan, The Great Mouse Detective
Don't fuck with THIS senator!
— Senator Armstrong, Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance
Bugs Bunny's Birthday Blowout! How about Bugs Bunny's Birthday BEATING?!
— The Angry Video Game Nerd during his review of The Bugs Bunny Birthday Blowout
Mr. Larson: (after Shooter takes the gold jacket) Hey, I believe that's Mr. Gilmore's! (slow-mo) Raaahrrr! I will get you, Shooter! (amidst beatings) Stay still!
Shooter McGavin: NOOOOO! (beatings continue)
Shooter McGavin: NOOOOO! (beatings continue)
Then all hell broke loose. It wasn't a trial. It wasn't even a lynching. It wasn't human.
— The Gibbon, Marvel Apes
Still... it hardly seems fair, being of my position, to take all my anger out on you. Which is why I promise up front not to murder you... No, I'll just beat you within an inch of your life!
— Ghirahim, The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
Chu: (trying to get up from the ground) Bastard...
Usopp: AH! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Rubberband! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! USOPP HAMMER!
Usopp: AH! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Rubberband! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! Usopp Hammer! USOPP HAMMER!
Hey, you know what really gets under my skin? Proverbially, of course? A century of wizards looking down their damn noses at me. Energy Drain!
I know people think I'm stupid. Because I'm not a wizard. Because I get bored easily. Because I have no interest in strategy or tactics or contingency planning. Energy Drain! But see, I've learned a lot over the years since I died. A lot more than I learned during my life. And now I see that planning doesn't matter. Strategy doesn't matter. Only two things matter: Force in as great a concentration as you can manage, and style. And in a pinch, style can slide. Energy Drain! In any battle, there's always a level of force against which no tactics can succeed. For example, all I need to do is keep smacking you with Energy Drains, and soon you won't be able to cast any of your fancy spells at all. Energy Drain! Because yes, I am a sorcerer - and this magic is in my bones, not cribbed off of "Magic for Dummies." And I can keep casting the same friggin' spell at you until you roll over and die. You can have your finely-crafted watch - give me the sledgehammer to the face any day. ENERGY DRAIN!
I know people think I'm stupid. Because I'm not a wizard. Because I get bored easily. Because I have no interest in strategy or tactics or contingency planning. Energy Drain! But see, I've learned a lot over the years since I died. A lot more than I learned during my life. And now I see that planning doesn't matter. Strategy doesn't matter. Only two things matter: Force in as great a concentration as you can manage, and style. And in a pinch, style can slide. Energy Drain! In any battle, there's always a level of force against which no tactics can succeed. For example, all I need to do is keep smacking you with Energy Drains, and soon you won't be able to cast any of your fancy spells at all. Energy Drain! Because yes, I am a sorcerer - and this magic is in my bones, not cribbed off of "Magic for Dummies." And I can keep casting the same friggin' spell at you until you roll over and die. You can have your finely-crafted watch - give me the sledgehammer to the face any day. ENERGY DRAIN!Then I find [the Engineer], hiding by teleporter. I take his gun away from him. He tries to hit me with wrench So I take wrench away from him. I take his wrench and shove it down his throat, all the way down to the handle. Then I rip off all his fingers, one by one! Let's see you build toys NOW! (laughs) There is blood everywhere! And he is crying! (laughs) I think he cries out for mother, but... the wrench is stuck in his throat! And it sounds like (imitates a choking noise). Is this not the funniest thing?
Looks like it's time for a sustained and brutal beating.
— Frank Castle, The Punisher MAX, "The Slavers"
Get up.
— Johnny Gat, repeatedly, Saints Row 2
If one of you try and violate me
You'll get a punch in your face with my front-door key
Punch in the neck with my back-door key
Box in the mouth with my X6 key
Box in the eye with the fob I use to log into my HSBC
Talk about banks, kill 'em with P's
Run up in yo girl's house with two of my G's
Get the money out, put the money in his mouth
Then suffocate man with about two G's
Suffocate man with about four G's
Suffocate man, then I might just breeze
I'll bury man two-foot shallow
Ain't got time to dig six feet deep
You'll get a punch in your face with my front-door key
Punch in the neck with my back-door key
Box in the mouth with my X6 key
Box in the eye with the fob I use to log into my HSBC
Talk about banks, kill 'em with P's
Run up in yo girl's house with two of my G's
Get the money out, put the money in his mouth
Then suffocate man with about two G's
Suffocate man with about four G's
Suffocate man, then I might just breeze
I'll bury man two-foot shallow
Ain't got time to dig six feet deep
—Jme, "Man Don't Care"
Ladies will tell you that fighting was only invented because men needed a way to measure their dongs when they were away from a ruler. But this fighting article is about something you can appreciate, girls: revenge. Sometimes combat is simply used as a way to tell your enemy that you thought about what they did and fuck them.
After a while, all I'm doing is pounding chunks of wet bone into the floorboards, so I stop.
— John Hartigan, Sin City
"I've taken a beating before, but never anything like this. Never like this. The sounds go wet. Maybe he keeps hitting me, I don't know. I'm gone. Gone to that place where there's no pain or thought. I wake up in mid air. The pavement rushes up to give me a big sloppy kiss."
—Dwight McCarthy gets the living shit beaten out of him by Manute, Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
Give me your face!
— Optimus Prime as he tears it off the Fallen, Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen
Your orders are simple: I punch, you suffer. Got it?
And with that, she cracked a blow to Kara's face that broke her nose.
The static-shriek of pain in the telepathic plug was a sonata to Satan Girl. Smiling for the first time in minutes, she followed with another wallop, and another, and another. Four unanswered blows. Kara tried to resist, but her defense was fading.
Satan Girl pounded her. Over and over again.
[...]
<Kara?>
Satan Girl hesitated. She had been laying into Supergirl like a butcher on a steer. But she had been so busy in her fantasy that she had taken no notice of what she had really done.
Supergirl was not moving.
Satan Girl smashed her a few more times, just to make sure. Then she listened for a heartbeat.
Nothing.
The static-shriek of pain in the telepathic plug was a sonata to Satan Girl. Smiling for the first time in minutes, she followed with another wallop, and another, and another. Four unanswered blows. Kara tried to resist, but her defense was fading.
Satan Girl pounded her. Over and over again.
[...]
<Kara?>
Satan Girl hesitated. She had been laying into Supergirl like a butcher on a steer. But she had been so busy in her fantasy that she had taken no notice of what she had really done.
Supergirl was not moving.
Satan Girl smashed her a few more times, just to make sure. Then she listened for a heartbeat.
Nothing.
"What's happening? Been away? Yeah! TEN FUCKING YEARS!"
—Morty, Layer Cake
"I'm going to start beating you now. I don't know when I'll stop."
—Vegeta, Dragon Ball Z Abridged
"I'm gonna break your arms. I'm gonna break your legs. I'm gonna break your neck. What you hear is excitement."
—Jack Reacher, Jack Reacher: Never Go Back
With that first blow on the elbow the nightmare had started... How many times he had been beaten, how long the beatings have continued, he could not remember. Always there were five or six men in black uniforms at him simultaneously. Sometimes it was fists, sometimes it was truncheons, sometimes it was steel rods, sometimes it was boots. There were times when he rolled around the floor, as shameless as an animal, writhing his body this way and that in an endless, hopeless effort to dodge the kicks, and simply inviting more and yet more kicks, in his ribs, in his belly, on his elbows, on his shins, in his groin, in his testicles, on the bone at the base of his spine. There were times when it went on and on until the cruel, wicked, unforgivable thing seemed to him not that the guards continued to beat him but that he could not force himself to lose consciousness... Sometimes he was beaten until he could hardly stand, then flung like a sack of potatoes onto the stone floor of a cell, left to recuperate for a few hours, and then taken out and beaten again.
— Winston Smith gets put through hell at the Ministry of Love, Nineteen Eighty-Four
In all my years of being a ninja, I've come close to death only twice. The first time, I broke one leg, both arms, and ruptured a handful of internal organs, that was when I was caught doing....'research'. Tsunade beat me like a drum.
— Master Jiraiya, Naruto
"I want him more than dead, I'll split his fricking head open!"
—Tetsuo, AKIRA
Kazuya Ryuuzaki: UUUUOOOOHHHH!!!! (Punch!) (Punch!)
Bright Noa: E-enough, Ryuuzaki!
Kazuya Ryuuzaki: I've had it with you, you warmonger piece of garbage!! (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!)
Trowa Barton: He's hitting all of his vital points with incredible precision.
Protagonist (in this case, Axel Almer): Ouch... It just hurts looking at it.
Duo Maxwelll: Uhhh, shouldn't we stop him?
Miwa Sakimori: Guuuuhh... Bleeeuurgh...
Kazuya Ryuuzaki: MIWAAAAAA!!!!
Kyoshiro Yuzuki: Cut it out, Kazuya, you're killing him!
Bright Noa: E-enough, Ryuuzaki!
Kazuya Ryuuzaki: I've had it with you, you warmonger piece of garbage!! (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!) (Punch!)
Trowa Barton: He's hitting all of his vital points with incredible precision.
Protagonist (in this case, Axel Almer): Ouch... It just hurts looking at it.
Duo Maxwelll: Uhhh, shouldn't we stop him?
Miwa Sakimori: Guuuuhh... Bleeeuurgh...
Kazuya Ryuuzaki: MIWAAAAAA!!!!
Kyoshiro Yuzuki: Cut it out, Kazuya, you're killing him!
You stupid, old man. You don't get to rush this.
—Abby Anderson, The Last of Us Part II
Don't go down, cocksucker. Don't go down, I want to hit you some more.
—Eliot, The Magician's Land
No! One more punch would kill you.
—Batman, Robot Chicken, remembering his one rule after having punched the Joker's face into a bloody mess
his one rule after having punched the Joker's face into a bloody messSuperman: "He's dead, Zod. You're going to have to pay for that."
Zod: "Forgive my not trembling, Kal-El... But what am I to fear, in light of your moronic code against killing?"
Superman: "You're right, Zod! I can't take your life— much as I'm tempted! But my code does not say a damn thing— about not battering you to within an inch of it!! Murderer!!" (thinking) And there are moments... When I think I should chuck that code altogether...!
Zod: "Forgive my not trembling, Kal-El... But what am I to fear, in light of your moronic code against killing?"
Superman: "You're right, Zod! I can't take your life— much as I'm tempted! But my code does not say a damn thing— about not battering you to within an inch of it!! Murderer!!" (thinking) And there are moments... When I think I should chuck that code altogether...!
Okay, that's enough! I'm not a punching bag!
—Jocelyn, It Lives Within, after being beaten half to death by Rowan Burke for misguidedly betraying them
